Christmastime... :) Shangy! >Here are the details on our Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com To UnSubscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com Group home page: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ShangyFunList or Web Site: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/ShangyFunList.html Group email address: ShangyFunList@yahoogroups.com or email me here: bcrsystems@earthlink.net ================ *~* A REMINDER: For Facebook Users: Please Friend Me / Like Me here... http://tinyurl.com/cma6all AND For Google Plus Users: You can find me here... Shangy Bigham https://plus.google.com/106648555948034085752/posts AND Please Share This email with All Your Friends And Family! ^~^ May God SUPER BLESS You As You Do! THANK YOU! :) -<>- * NOTE: An easy way to adjust the size of print in email or any page is to hold down the Ctrl tab while moving the scroll button on the mouse. You can also use the keyboard to change the font size in your web browser or emails. Hold down the Ctrl key while pressing the + key for larger text or the - key for smaller text! ================ >-->HOT Off The 'Shangy' Press :) This super hottie astonished me. It came from my son Victor. He had asked if I knew about it and then sent me a forward. I just love 3D art and these are ones we can have right in our own homes! Be sure to check this beauty out here: .--._.--.--.__.--.--.__.--.--.__.--.--._.--. _(_ _Y_ _Y_ _Y_ _Y_ _)_ [___] [___] [___] [___] [___] [___] /:' \ /:' \ /:' \ /:' \ /:' \ /:' \ |:: | |:: | |:: | |:: | |:: | |:: | \::. / \::. / \::. / \::. / \::. / \::. / jgs \::./ \::./ \::./ \::./ \::./ \::./ '=' '=' '=' '=' '=' '=' 3D Liquid Floors! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/3dfloors.html -<>- >AND From Our Friend Geniann :) She sent us an awesome video for one we already had. I love the video she sent for it so I updated the page with it! Gives even a more up close and personal experience with the elephants. Be sure to check it out here... Elephant Hotel! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/elhotel.html --- ...Awesome addition to our page! Thanks Geniann =========================================================== >-->From Heartwarmers: _ .-(_) / _/ .-' \ / '. ,-~--~-~-~-~-, {__.._...__..._} ,888, ,888, /\##" 6 6 "##/\ ,88' `88, ,88' '88,__ |(\` (__) `/)| __,88' `88 ,88' .8(_ \_____\_ '----' _/_____/ _)8. 8' 88 (___)\ \ '-.__ __.-' / /(___) 88 (___)88 | '--' | 88(___) 8' (__)88,___/ \___,88(__) __`88,_/__________________\_,88`__ / `88, |88| ,88' \ / `88, |88| ,88' \ /____________`88,_\88/_,88`____________\ /88888888888888888;8888;88888888888888888\ /^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^`/88\\^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^\ jgs / |88| \============, \ /_ __ __ __ _ __ |88|_|^ MERRY | _ ___\ |;:. |88| | CHRISTMAS! | | |;;:. |88| '============' | |;;:. |88| | |::. |88| | |;;:' |88| | |:;, |88| | '---------------------""""---------------------' Christmas gift suggestions: To your enemy, forgiveness. To an opponent, tolerance. To a friend, your heart. To a customer, service. To all, charity. To every child, a good example. To yourself, respect. You'll be laughing when you read today's story -- it's about a little mix-up that brought some surprise warmth to the hard workers at the VA Hospital. Thanks Kathe for making our holidays a little more cheerier! -<>- >PINK CHRISTMAS SURPRISE by Kathe Campbell The VA Hospital doctors and pharmacy had been waging war with my husband Ken's rheumatoid arthritis for years, providing the latest medicines as quick as they became available. His long monthly trips for checkups also necessitated serums specially packed in Styrofoam coolers surrounded by frozen ice bags. We stored the bags out in the small fridge-freezer on our back deck. He is a WWII Army Air Force vet, and had business near the VA Hospital just before Christmas. He decided to divest our burgeoning freezer of countless ice bags by returning them back to the pharmacy. It was just a nice way of telling the VA he was an appreciative veteran. Upon his return home that evening, I inquired as to his day with the doctors. All had gone well, but he looked tired and remarked that the pharmacy was very glad to have the cooler box and ice bags back. "One thing though," he mentioned offhandedly, "they wondered why all the freezer bags were pink." "Pink?" I queried. "What do you mean, pink?" "Yeah, pink," he adamantly muttered again. "But haven't you ever noticed, the pharmacy bags are always white?" I insisted. "Beats me. I thought they came in colors," as he heaved an unconcerned sigh and tilted his recliner back for a well-deserved snooze. While I stared unfocused into the fridge trying to conjure up a dinner idea, the deepest recesses of my mind kept wandering back to pink. Pink, pink, pink, why would those bags turn pink, I mulled over and over? Suddenly a light came on and the awful reality began setting in. Oh mercy no, it just couldn't be as I raced into the laundry room to check out the freezer, then downstairs to the old freezer in the basement where sure enough, the answer loomed before me. "Jumpin' Jehosafats, Pops, you gave away my stash of frozen strawberry daiquiris that I made last summer!" "Sorry dear, thought they looked a little different. You can whip up some more can't you?" Ken concluded as he tossed me a devilish grin. Our marriage was a good one. First, we kept faith with both our Christian upbringings, and secondly, we didn't hesitate to state our minds. Long ago a friend had advised that keeping it all in was best, even though her marriage failed. That wasn't going to happen to us for after fifty years we had amiably exchanged a few honest words uttered over a myriad of touchy subjects. But there are times, circumstances, and an old friend's well meaning advice when one keeps it all in, especially when a husband is unwell. Chagrined to the core, and finally slightly amused, I took the phone in hand to catch one of the VA pharmacists who seemed tickled pink when he heard my name. The jig was up and all I could say was... "Whatever you do, don't throw the pink bags out that my husband returned to you today. They were my stash of strawberry daiquiris, so treat them with care and enjoy your holiday on us." "Ma'am, we opened one up after hours in the back room, and are sharing it as we speak. They're the best. Thanks, Mrs. C., and tell that old man of yours he can cross our palms with strawberry daiquiris any time. He really knows how to liven up a long day." With little left to say, I sent my compliments to all and raised my cup of coffee in an appropriate toast... "Here's to you, VA Pharmacy. Divvy them up and have yourselves a merry little Christmas." -- Kathe Campbell __________________________________________________ Kathe lives her dream on a Montana mountain with her mammoth donkeys, a Keeshond, and a few kitties. Three children, eleven grands and three greats round out her herd. She is a prolific writer on Alzheimer's, and her stories are found on many ezines. Kathe is a contributing author to the Chicken Soup For The Soul and Cup of Comfort series, numerous anthologies, RX for Writers, magazines and medical journals. =========================================================== >-->From Our Friend Karen :) _.-O-._ o_o_o_o_o \_`___`_/ } /. .\ { } | _c_ | { __}_\www/_{__ (((( { } )))) | |o { } o| | | |o {_} o| | |_\o _ o/_| \_/==L_I//\_/ \)-.__//-(/ | : //: | | :|/ : | | : | : | | : | : | |---|---| jgs |__ | __| (___|___) >A Christmas Story I had no Christmas spirit when I breathed a weary sigh, and looked across the table where the bills were piled too high. The laundry wasn't finished and the dinner I had to fix, The dishwasher wouldn't work, and now it's all in bits And so with only minutes till my son got home from school, I gave up on the drudgery and grabbed a wooden stool. The burdens that I carried were about all I could take, and so I flipped the TV on to catch a little break. I came upon a desert scene in shades of tan and rust, No snowflakes hung upon the wind, just clouds of swirling dust. And where the reindeer should have stood before a laden sleigh, eight hummers ran a column right behind an M1A. A group of boys walked past the tank, not one was past his teens, Their eyes were hard as polished flint, their faces drawn and lean. They walked the street in armor with their rifles shouldered tight, their dearest wish for Christmas, just to have a silent night. Other soldiers gathered, hunkered down against the wind, To share a scrap of mail and dreams of going home again. There wasn't much at all to put their lonely hearts at ease, They had no Christmas turkey, just a pack of MRE's. They didn't have a garland or a stocking I could see, They didn't need an ornament-- they lacked a Christmas Tree. They didn't have a present even though it was tradition, the only boxes I could see were labeled "ammunition". I felt a little tug and found my son now by my side, He asked me what it was I feared, and why it was I cried. I swept him up into my arms and held him oh so near and kissed him on the forehead as I whispered in his ear. There's nothing wrong, my little son, for safe we sleep tonight. Our heroes stand on foreign land to give us all the right, to worry about the things in life that really mean nothing at all, instead of wondering each day if we will be the next to fall. He looked at me as children do and said it's always right, to thank the ones who help us and perhaps that we should write. And so we pushed aside the bills and sat to draft a note, to thank the many far from home, and this is what we wrote, "God bless you all and keep you safe, and speed your way back home. Remember that we love you so, and that you're not alone. The gift you give, you share with all, a present every day, You give the gift of liberty and that we can't repay. -Author unknown --- ...Amen! Such an endearing one! Thanks Karen =========================================================== >-->From Archives InspiredBuffalo: _v __* (__) ff ff ff ff {\/ (_(__).-. ff <_\__, <_\__, <_\__, <_\__, __,~~.(`>|-(___)/ ,_) o<_\__, (_ ff ~(_ ff ~(_ ff ~(_ ff~~~~~@ )\/_;-"`` | (___)~~//<_\__, <_\__, <_\__, <_\__, | \__________/| // >> (___)~~(___)~~(___)~~(___)~~~~\\_/_______\_// // >> // >> // >> // >> jgs `'---------'` "True Story of Rudolph" A man named Bob May, depressed and brokenhearted, stared out his drafty apartment window into the chilling December night. His 4-year-old daughter Barbara sat on his lap quietly sobbing. Bobs wife, Evelyn, was dying of cancer. Little Barbara couldn't understand why her mommy could never come home. Barbara looked up into her dad's eyes and asked, "Why isn't Mommy just like everybody else's Mommy?" Bob's jaw tightened and his eyes welled with tears. Her question brought waves of grief, but also of anger. It had been the story of Bob's life. Life always had to be different for Bob. Small when he was a kid, Bob was often bullied by other boys. He was too little at the time to compete in sports. He was often called names he'd rather not remember. From childhood, Bob was different and never seemed to fit in. Bob did complete college, married his loving wife and was grateful to get his job as a copywriter at Montgomery Ward during the Great Depression. Then he was blessed with his little girl. But it was all short-lived. Evelyn's bout with cancer stripped them of all their savings and now Bob and his daughter were forced to live in a two-room apartment in the Chicago slums. Evelyn died just days before Christmas in 1938. Bob struggled to give hope to his child, for whom he couldn't even afford to buy a Christmas gift. But if he couldn't buy a gift, he was determined a make one - a storybook! Bob had created an animal character in his own mind and told the animal's story to little Barbara to give her comfort and hope. Again and again Bob told the story, embellishing it more with each telling. Who was the character? What was the story all about? The story Bob May created was his own autobiography in fable form. The character he created was a misfit outcast like he was. The name of the character? A little reindeer named Rudolph, with a big shiny nose. Bob finished the book just in time to give it to his little girl on Christmas Day. But the story doesn't end there. The general manager of Montgomery Ward caught wind of the little storybook and offered Bob May a nominal fee to purchase the rights to print the book. Wards went on to print, Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer and distribute it to children visiting Santa Claus in their stores. By 1946 Wards had printed and distributed more than six million copies of Rudolph. That same year, a major publisher wanted to purchase the rights from Wards to print an updated version of the book. In an unprecedented gesture of kindness, the CEO of Wards returned all rights back to Bob May. The book became a best seller. Many toy and marketing deals followed and Bob May, now remarried with a growing family, became wealthy from the story he created to comfort his grieving daughter. But the story doesn't end there either. Bob's brother-in-law, Johnny Marks, made a song adaptation to Rudolph. Though the song was turned down by such popular vocalists as Bing Crosby and Dinah Shore , it was recorded by the singing cowboy, Gene Autry. "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer" was released in 1949 and became a phenomenal success, selling more records than any other Christmas song, with the exception of "White Christmas." The gift of love that Bob May created for his daughter so long ago kept on returning back to bless him again and again. And Bob May learned the lesson, just like his dear friend Rudolph, that being different isn't so bad. In fact, being different can be a blessing. -<>- >NEVER TOO OLD by Stephen T. Banko It didn't look much like Christmas that December 23, 1969. The trees were lush, the countryside awash in green. There was no hint of snow in the sweltering heat. In fact, I was the only thing that looked like Christmas. I was perched in the open door of a helicopter hovering about fifty feet over the center of a dusty village in the III Tactical Corps area of Vietnam. Instead of the ubiquitous olive drab the cloaked everything military, I was clad in a bright red Santa suit, complete with hat and white beard. I had a sack of toys slung over my shoulder replacing the M-16 I usually carried. I wanted to make the entrance into the village square as quickly as possible before the beard turned gray with sweat and dust. I checked the harness of my rappelling gear, gave a thumbs-up to the chopper crew, and jumped out into space. I slid down the rope and made a soft landing in the center of the square. The helicopter departed in a final cloud of dust while I looked around the square. Dozens of kids were arrayed around me. Interpreters and Vietnamese-language slingers informing them that something joyful and wonderful would happen had summoned them. I could tell from the puzzled looks on their faces though that these kids still weren't too sure that my arrival was the "something joyful and wonderful." My silly "ho-ho-ho" didn't help much either. The kids kept shrinking farther away from this stranger in red, and I thought my Santa Claus routine would be just another failed attempt to impose western ideas on an eastern culture. I sat down in the middle of the square, wondering how I could let these kids know that Santa was one of the good guys. My mouth was still fuzzy with dust from my landing in the village, so I opened a butterscotch drop and popped it into my mouth to chase away the cobwebs. Instantly, the kids started inching closer. It took me a minute to realize they were drawn by the sight of food. I peeled the wrapper off another and held it out in my hand. Slowly, one little girl allowed the allure of the candy to overcome her reluctance. She came forward to take the butterscotch from my hand. She put it in her mouth, and the half-frightened look on her face blossomed into a beautiful flower of a smile. Then the dam broke and all the kids from all corners of the square were ionized to the magnet of the sweet stuff. They sat on me and touched me and laughed and giggled and smiled. I couldn't peel wrappers off fast enough so I just started throwing the candy into the air. The kids scrambled frantically for it at first, but then returned to their better nature when they realized there would be enough for all of them. Having captured their attention with the candy, I then broke out some small spiral notebooks and pens. As they marveled over their collective treasures, I went into the crowd of adults in the periphery with my fellow GIs and started handing out food from c-ration packs and from the packages we'd received from home. My mother's chocolate chip cookies were a big hit. The Vietnamese bowed and gestured and spoke their rapid-fire reactions but what I understood best were the smiles. We handed out Coke and Dr. Pepper and Pepsi and whatever else we'd scrounged for our gift-giving and, after a short while, everyone in the village had been given something in celebration of the birth of a little baby none of them had ever heard of. We didn't have much peace to spread beyond that precious hour of sanity in the asylum of Vietnam, but we did have an abundance of good will to share. Yes, I've studied at some great colleges in my life and I've been taught by some of the greatest minds of our time, but I've never learned a lesson quite like the one I did in that tiny village square on that special Christmas in 1969. Those Vietnamese knew nothing of Christianity and cared even less about it. They never heard of Christmas before that day and certainly have never celebrated it since, however I know with utter certainty that they taught me more about the real meaning of Christmas than I ever thought I'd learn. Christmas is not complicated. It rests in the hearts of people everywhere, all the time. Christmas is pure and it is simple. We can find Christmas ever day, in so very many ways. Christmas is love and when we show it, we get it back. The child born that first Christmas was never too young to teach that, and I pray that none of us are ever too old to learn it. -- Stephen T. Banko -<>- >Links for Your Enjoyment: Shangrala's Christmas Index http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/christmasindex.html The 23rd Psalm!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/psalm23.html Lean On Me!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/poems/leanonme.html Miracle Baby!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/smellofrain.html The Black Dot!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/blackdot.html 90/20 Principle!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/giving.html Love Thoughts!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/love.html Dreamy Ladies!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/dreamy.html What Is Love 1!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/wlove1.html Butterfly's Story!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/butterflystory.html When God Paints!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/gpaints.html Blind Woman Sees!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/blindsees.html Jesus Laughing Art!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/Jesusart.html -<>- >From Our Friend Melinda :) Too much Christianity'? Time to rebel, says group [Culture] A faith-based group in Mississippi is urging alumni and fans of Ole Miss to speak out against a decision to rename the campus's annual Christmas observance. http://tinyurl.com/qjel5mq SPREAD THE "CHRISTMAS" SONG & MESSAGE http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IAckfn8yiAQ --- ...Sweet! Thanks Melinda! -<>- >From Our Friend Bunni :) Funny Pugs Reaction To Christmas Song http://tinyurl.com/nl6uj7r --- ...So cute! Thanks Bunni! -<>- >From Our Friend LouiseA :) A random family in Englewood Cliffs, New Jersey gets treated to some Awesome Christmas Caroling. This epic Christmas caroling event was conducted by Improv Everywhere and featured a 20-person brass orchestra and a 13-member choir. The family looks like they enjoyed this surprise Christmas caroling event that took place in their front yard. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xnIQinb8ofk&feature=player_embedded Florence Baptist Temple in South Carolina got quite a surprise during its annual Christmas performance. A gospel quartet's van broke down nearby and the quartet took to the stage with this hilarious performance. https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=SzXJ3vuCzCc Don't you just love vocal music? I sure do, especially when it's as clever and creative as this! A cappella super group Pentatonix returns with a stunning rendition of the Christmas classic "Angels We Have Heard On High." https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VAMzAIH12yc&feature=player_embedded Kelly Clarkson singing one of my all-time favorite Christmas songs? But add in some Trisha Yearwood? Now I'm really getting excited! Wait, there's one even more famous singer coming in at the big finale? You've got to watch this incredible "Silent Night" rendition to find out who it is. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5BRVkgaIcaE&feature=player_embedded --- ...Wonderful! Thanks LouiseA! -<>- >From Our Friend Geniann :) A Christmas Card http://tinyurl.com/y857e4b It's hard to believe that the greatest message the world has ever heard is contained in one simple musical scale. Click below: The Christmas Scale https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rNDtHdG5mVk THESE STORIES WOULD TOUCH EVEN THE "SCROOGIEST" PERSON IN EXISTENCE. YES, IT'S AN OLDIE, BUT ONE YOU WILL SURELY PASS FORWARD. My Christmas Eve by Bob Welsh https://www.youtube.com/embed/WxjZB5S_g7s?rel=0 --- ...Awesome! Thanks Geniann! -<>- >From Our Friend Melody :) Cats Christmas http://www.fluffytails.ca/christmas.asp Mickey Mouse - Christmas (Santa Workshop) and Decorations - MUST Watch https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4CI6RTcf3ks --- ...Fun ones! Thanks Melody! Visit Melissa's Online Store You can get anything you want (except for Melissa ) at the online store http://pdhomes.net/mall/babylissa/mySTORES/ISELL4.html ========================================================== >-->From Our Friend Bunni :) _, .-"``'. _..-"`` \ / \ _.-" | \ /|\ \ .--...-' | '-' | | | \ :: | | | | | :: | / / | | :: | / / \ / .: | / / . '._ _.' .: | / / :: ``--`` .: / ; ;| :: .: / | | \ ':. ' / | | `. ':. .' | | _'. ': .' | | /` `\`-._ ____ ____ __,-;` ; ; \_/\ \.-'```'-._`""`_.-'```'-._\ \ __ \ \ / _.-'`'-._ '..' _.-'`'-. '. \ / `\ \ \ / .' '. .' /`\_) . \ \__ \ \ <.____________> <_____\____/_> '.__) | jgs '._ / `""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""` >Christmas 1989 Vince, my son, was A.W.O.L. from my life for some time. His birthday is December 13th. In the year 1985, I had not heard from him for some time and decided to drive to his house in Texas. There, I found my lost child, a man, but still a child to me. He sat on a wooden chair with a blanket around him, huddled in front of a kerosene heater in a home void of furniture (other than the chair), a home void of electricity, and normal heat. I took my son and brought him home for Christmas. I fed him well and nurtured him back to health. We developed a plan for him. That Christmas was filled with tears and joy, tears of what might have been. Joy of what was. I remember reading about another Father who took His Son home once when He was tired and alone. We should do the same when we can. B.J. Cassady Copyright ©2005 B.J. Cassady Guthrie, Oklahoma --- ...Good story! Thanks Bunni! =========================================================== >-->From Our Friend Linda :) .__. .==========. .(\\//). .-[ for you! ] .(\\()//)./ '==========' .----(\)\/(/)----. | ///\\\ | | ///||\\\ | | //`||||`\\ | | |||| | | |||| | | |||| | | |||| | | |||| | | |||| | jgs '------====------' >The Joy Of Christmas: Christmas Greetings I have a list of people All written in a book - And every year at Christmas time I go and take a look. And that is when I realize That those names are all a part - Not of the book they're written in But of my very heart. For each name stands for someone Who has crossed my path some time - And in that meeting they've become A treasured friend of mine. And once you've met some people The years cannot erase - The memory of a pleasant word Or of a friendly face. So when I send an email That is addressed to you - It's because you're on that 'Special List' Of folk that I'm indebted to. And you are one of several folk In times past that I've met - And happen to be one of those I don't want ever to forget. And whether I have known you For many years or few - In some way you have had a part In shaping things I do. So this the Spirit of Christmas That forever still endures - May it leave its richest blessing In the hearts of you and yours. -<>- _ _ ((\o/)) .-----//^\\-----. | /`| |`\ | | | | | | | | | jgs | | | | '------===------' >"Gold Wrapping Paper" I received this from a friend who had a choice to make. It said that I had a choice to make too. I've chosen. Now it's your turn to choose. The story goes that some time ago a mother punished her five year old daughter for wasting a roll of expensive gold wrapping paper. Money was tight and she became even more upset when the child used the gold paper to decorate a box to put under the Christmas tree. Nevertheless, the little girl brought the gift box to her mother the next morning and then said, "This is for you, Momma." The mother was embarrassed by her earlier over reaction, but her anger flared again when she opened the box and found it was empty. She spoke to her daughter in a harsh manner. "Don't you know, young lady, when you give someone a present there's supposed to be something inside the package?" She had tears in her eyes and said, "Oh, Momma, it's not empty! I blew kisses into it until it was full." The mother was crushed. She fell on her knees and put her arms around her little girl, and she begged her forgiveness for her thoughtless anger. An accident took the life of the child only a short time later, and it is told that the mother kept that gold box by her bed for all the years of her life. Whenever she was discouraged or faced difficult problems she would open the box and take out an imaginary kiss and remember the love of the child who had put it there. In a very real sense, each of us, as human beings, have been given a Golden box filled with unconditional love and kisses from our children, family, friends and GOD. There is no more precious possession anyone could hold. You now have two choices: 1. Pass this on to your friends, or 2. Delete it and act like it didn't touch your heart. As you can see, I took choice No. 1.Friends are like angels who lift us to our feet, when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly. If you receive this more than once in return just know that your friends have also thought of you. --- ...Awww, so sweet! Thanks Linda! =========================================================== >-->From Our Friend Fran :) [Politics] >The perfect day. January 20, 2017 1. President Donald Trump and Vice-President Ted Cruz are sworn into office. 2. In a rare event on inauguration day, Congress convenes for an emergency meeting to repeal the illegal and unconstitutional Socialist healthcare farce known as Obamacare. The new Director of Health and Social Services, Dr. Ben Carson, announces that an independent group of healthcare management professionals is hired to handle healthcare services for poor and low income people. They are also assigned the duty of eliminating Medicare and Medicaid fraud. Government’s costs for public healthcare are reduced by 90%. Healthcare insurance premiums for working Americans are reduced by 50%. The move saves billions of taxpayer paid dollars. Healthcare service in the U.S. improves 80%. 3. Newly appointed department of Homeland Security, General McChrystal, announces the immediate deployment of Troops to the U.S. Mexico border to control illegal immigration and the immediate deportation of illegals with criminal records or links to terrorist groups. New bio-encrypted Social Security ID’s are required by every American citizen. Birthright is abolished. All immigration from countries that represent a threat to the safety of American citizens is terminated indefinitely. The move saves American taxpayers billions of dollars. Several prisons are closed after deportation of the criminals serving time. 4. Newly appointed Secretary of Business and Economic Development, Mitt Romney, eliminates more than half of the Government agencies operating under the Obama administration saving taxpayers billions of dollars. Stocks rise 90%. 5. Newly appointed Director of Government Finance, Rand Paul, announces the abolition of the IRS and displays a copy of the new Federal Tax Return form. It consists of one page. The instructions consist of two pages. The Federal Reserve is audited closley. The move saves American taxpayers billions of dollars and increases tax revenue. 6. Hillary Clinton is in jail. Her cell is directly across from Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton who are serving time for ‘Hate Crimes." She bitches at them constantly from behind the bars of her cell in what some might call cruel and unusual punishment. 7. Bernie Sanders is in a mental asylum. His room is directly across from Nancy Pelosi, Debbie Wasserman Schultz, Chris Matthews and Al Franken. They meet for tea every day at ten and discuss the success and benefits of Communism and Socialism throughout the world. They wonder when the “Mothership” is going to pick them up and return them to their home planets. 8. Windows 12 is released. It is designed for humans, doesn’t try to satisfy the needs of every person on the planet, doesn’t require a degree in nuclear physics to operate and looks just like Windows 10 except it is easier to use. 9. Barack Obama flees the United States under cover of darkness and returns to his homeland of Kenya before his trial for treason begins. He deplanes on a remote jungle airstrip. He was last seen wandering through the jungle singing “Hakuna Matata” with a chimp named Commie. 10. Oscar Meyer announces the introduction of a new cholesterol and fat free pepperoni that tastes just like regular pepperoni. Not to be outdone, Kraft Foods announces the introduction of several varieties of cholesterol and fat free cheeses that taste just like regular cheese. 11. A committee is not established to determine what is causing global cooling. Billions of taxpayer dollars are saved so are many species on the edge of extinction. 12. Dead people are no longer allowed to vote; this was a huge blow for the Democrat Party. And this, my friends, constitutes THE PERFECT DAY! * Season's Greetings * 11/96 __,_,_,___) _______ (--| | | (--/ ),_) ,_) | | | _ ,_,_ | |_ ,_ ' , _|_,_,_, _ , __| | | (/_| | (_| | | || |/_)_| | | |(_|/_)___, ( |___, ,__| \____) |__, |__, MERRY CHRISTMAS! --- ...Aww, pinch me! What a wonderful dream! Even better then our last 'perfect day'! No editing required! Thanks Fran! ============================================================ >-->From Our Friend Geniann :) ___ / __'. .-"""-. .-""-| | '.'. / .---. \ / .--. \ \___\ \/ /____| | / / \ `-.-;-(`_)_____.-'._ ; ; `.-" "-:_,(o:==..`-. '. .-"-, | | / \ / `\ `. \ / .-. \ \ \ | Y __...\ \ \ / / \/ /\ | | | .--""--.| .-' \ '.`---' / \ \ / / |` \' _...--.; '---'` \ '-' / jgs /_..---.._ \ .'\\_ `. `--'` .' (_) `'/ (_) / `._ _.'| .' ``````` '-...--'` >CHRISTMAS AT A GAS STATION The old man sat in his gas station on a cold Christmas Eve. He hadn't been anywhere in years since his wife had passed away. It was just another day to him. He didn't hate Christmas, just couldn't find a reason to celebrate. He was sitting there looking at the snow that had been falling for the last hour and wondering what it was all about when the door opened and a homeless man stepped through. Instead of throwing the man out, Old George as he was known by his customers, told the man to come and sit by the heater and warm up. "Thank you, but I don't mean to intrude," said the stranger. "I see you're busy, I'll just go." "Not without something hot in your belly." George said. He turned and opened a wide mouth Thermos and handed it to the stranger. "It ain't much, but it's hot and tasty. Stew ... Made it myself. When you're done, there's coffee and it's fresh." Just at that moment he heard the "ding" of the driveway bell. "Excuse me, be right back," George said. There in the driveway was an old '53 Chevy. Steam was rolling out of the front. The driver was panicked. "Mister can you help me!" said the driver, with a deep Spanish accent. "My wife is with child and my car is broken." George opened the hood. It was bad. The block looked cracked from the cold, the car was dead. "You ain't going in this thing," George said as he turned away. "But Mister, please help ..." The door of the office closed behind George as he went inside. He went to the office wall and got the keys to his old truck, and went back outside. He walked around the building, opened the garage, started the truck and drove it around to where the couple was waiting. "Here, take my truck," he said. "She ain't the best thing you ever looked at, but she runs real good." George helped put the woman in the truck and watched as it sped off into the night. He turned and walked back inside the office. "Glad I gave 'em the truck, their tires were shot too. That 'ol truck has brand new ones." George thought he was talking to the stranger, but the man had gone. The Thermos was on the desk, empty, with a used coffee cup beside it. "Well, at least he got something in his belly," George thought. George went back outside to see if the old Chevy would start. It cranked slowly, but it started. He pulled it into the garage where the truck had been. He thought he would tinker with it for something to do. Christmas Eve meant no customers. He discovered that the block hadn't cracked, it was just the bottom hose on the radiator. "Well, shoot, I can fix this," he said to himself. So he put a new one on. "Those tires ain't gonna get 'em through the winter either." He took the snow treads off of his wife's old Lincoln. They were like new and he wasn't going to drive the car anyway. As he was working, he heard shots being fired. He ran outside and beside a police car an officer lay on the cold ground. Bleeding from the left shoulder, the officer moaned, "Please help me." George helped the officer inside as he remembered the training he had received in the Army as a medic. He knew the wound needed attention. "Pressure to stop the bleeding," he thought. The uniform company had been there that morning and had left clean shop towels. He used those and duct tape to bind the wound. "Hey, they say duct tape can fix anything'," he said, trying to make the policeman feel at ease. "Something for pain," George thought. All he had was the pills he used for his back. "These ought to work." He put some water in a cup and gave the policeman the pills. "You hang in there, I'm going to get you an ambulance." The phone was dead. "Maybe I can get one of your buddies on that there talk box out in your car." He went out only to find that a bullet had gone into the dashboard destroying the two way radio. He went back in to find the policeman sitting up. "Thanks," said the officer. "You could have left me there. The guy that shot me is still in the area." George sat down beside him, "I would never leave an injured man in the Army and I ain't gonna leave you." George pulled back the bandage to check for bleeding. "Looks worse than what it is. Bullet passed right through 'ya. Good thing it missed the important stuff though. I think with time your gonna be right as rain." George got up and poured a cup of coffee. "How do you take it?" he asked. "None for me," said the officer.. "Oh, yer gonna drink this. Best in the city. Too bad I ain't got no donuts." The officer laughed and winced at the same time. The front door of the office flew open. In burst a young man with a gun. "Give me all your cash! Do it now!" the young man yelled. His hand was shaking and George could tell that he had never done anything like this before. "That's the guy that shot me!" exclaimed the officer. "Son, why are you doing this?" asked George, "You need to put the cannon away. Somebody else might get hurt." The young man was confused. "Shut up old man, or I'll shoot you, too. Now give me the cash!" The cop reached for his gun. "Put that thing away," George said to him, "we got 1 too many in here now." He turned his attention to the young man. "Son, it's Christmas Eve. If you need money, well then, here. It ain't much but it's all I got. Now put that pea shooter away." George pulled $150 out of his pocket and handed it to the young man, reaching for the barrel of the gun at the same time. The young man released his grip on the gun, fell to his knees and began to cry. "I'm not very good at this am I? All I wanted was to buy something for my wife and son," he went on. "I've lost my job, my rent is due, my car got repossessed last week." George handed the gun to the cop. "Son, we all get in a bit of squeeze now and then. The road gets hard sometimes, but we make it through the best we can." He got the young man to his feet, and sat him down on a chair across from the cop. "Sometimes we do stupid things." George handed the young man a cup of coffee. "Bein' stupid is one of the things that makes us human. Comin' in here with a gun ain't the answer. Now sit there and get warm and we'll sort this thing out." The young man stopped crying, and looked at the cop "Sorry I shot you. It just went off. I'm sorry officer." he said. "Shut up and drink your coffee " the cop said. George could hear the sounds of sirens outside. A police car and an ambulance skidded to a halt. Two cops came through the door, guns drawn. "Chuck! You ok?" one of the cops asked the wounded officer. "Not bad for a guy who took a bullet. How did you find me?" "GPS locator in the car. Best thing since sliced bread. Who did this?" the other cop asked as he approached the young man. Chuck answered him, "I don't know. The guy ran off into the dark. Just dropped his gun and ran." George and the young man both looked puzzled at each other. "That guy work here?" the wounded cop continued. "Yep," George said, "just hired him this morning. Boy lost his job." The paramedics came in and loaded Chuck onto the stretcher. The young man leaned over the wounded cop and whispered, "Why?" Chuck just said, "Merry Christmas boy ... and you too, George, and thanks for everything." "Well, looks like you got one doozy of a break there. That ought to solve some of your problems." George went into the back room and came out with a box. He pulled out a ring box. "Here you go, something for the little woman. I don't think Martha would mind. She said it would come in handy some day." The young man looked inside to see the biggest diamond ring he ever saw. "I can't take this," said the young man. "It means something to you." "And now it means something to you," replied George. "I got my memories. That's all I need." George reached into the box again. An airplane, a car and a truck appeared next. They were toys that the oil company had left for him to sell. "Here's something for that little man of yours." The young man began to cry again as he handed back the $150 that the old man had handed him earlier. "And what are you supposed to buy Christmas dinner with? You keep that too," George said. "Now git home to your family." The young man turned with tears streaming down his face. "I'll be here in the morning for work, if that job offer is still good." "Nope. I'm closed Christmas day," George said. "See ya the day after." George turned around & found the stranger had returned. "Where'd you come from? I thought you'd left?" "I have been here. I have always been here," said the stranger. "You say you don't celebrate Christmas. Why?" "Well, after my wife passed away, I just couldn't see what all the bother was. Puttin' up a tree and all seemed a waste of a good pine tree. Bakin' cookies like I used to with Martha just wasn't the same by myself and besides I was gettin' a little chubby." The stranger put his hand on George's shoulder. "But you do celebrate the holiday, George. You gave me food and drink and warmed me when I was cold and hungry. The woman with child will bear a son and he will become a great doctor. The policeman you helped will go on to save 19 people from being killed by terrorists. The young man who tried to rob you will make you a rich man and not take any for himself. "That is the spirit of the season and you keep it as good as any man." George was taken aback by all this stranger had said. "And how do you know all this?" asked the old man. "Trust me, George. I have the inside track on this sort of thing. And when your days are done you will be with Martha again." The stranger moved toward the door. "If you will excuse me, George, I have to go now. I have to go home where there is a big celebration planned." George watched as the old leather jacket and the torn pants that the stranger was wearing turned into a white robe. A golden light began to fill the room. "You see, George ... it's My birthday. Merry Christmas." George fell to his knees and replied, "Happy Birthday, Lord Jesus" This story is better than any greeting card. .:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:. . * . . /.\ . . /..'\ . . /'.'\ . . /.''.'\ . . /.'.'.\ MERRY CHRISTMAS AND GOD BLESS! . . /'.''.'.\ . . ^^^[_]^^^ . . . . . .jgs . .:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:. Now clear the lump from your throat, blow your nose, and send this along to a friend of yours or someone who may need a reminder as to why we celebrate Christmas. Tomorrow is not promised, - Cherish today! --- ...An inspirational Classic! Thanks Geniann! ========================================================= __ [_ | _____||_____ .'` _ || .'`\ ,;;, / _[_]_ || / | _(\()/)___ | (") \/ | | /__(/\)___/| | >/ . \< | || || || | \_:_/ | _.'| || || '-----...----`\ |____||____|/ | | \ | | | '.__/ jgs | | >The Christmas Perpetrator Story Editor: by "Mom to Six" Joyce Schowalter Washington, USA In December 2007, my husband had been out of work for six months and was attending Seminary to become an ordained minister. He intended to go back into the Army as a Chaplain. During his school money was tight, to say the least. Of our six children, the oldest was 19 and usually pretty handy with electronics. Dad had told him, "I wouldn't open that DVD player if I were you." Well, he wasn't dad, he did open it: It quit working. A new DVD player wasn't on our list to buy, not with car repairs, utility bills and a mortgage company wanting money. That Christmas didn't seem likely to be very present heavy, but I determined to make it happy. We did cheap things -- parades, community fun days, baking cookies, making candy and homemade gift baskets. Perhaps those things weren't as exciting as loading the tree with gifts, but hopefully my children would learn that family togetherness and traditions are more important than "stuff". One evening after dinner I was standing in the kitchen when the doorbell rang. I went to answer it and opened it to find no one there. Aargh, I hate it when those rotten neighbor kids "ring and run." I was determined to find them this time! In slippers, I headed out to the sidewalk to find the perpetrator and give them a good tongue-lashing. Heading toward the mailbox, I heard someone near the house and called out. "OK, you may think it's funny to ring the doorbell and run, but I don't!" Then I saw movement. Ha! I had them now. Someone moved behind my car, probably thinking they could scoot around the back of the truck and be home free. But I had parked so you couldn't get in between the garage and the garbage cans. I stood at the end of the driveway. "Come out," I said, in my biggest, scary Mom voice. "I can see you there!" A muffled, disguised voice replied, "Hey lady, go check your door!" Huh? I stopped short -- what was up? "I checked, there isn't anything at my door," I replied. "Not at your door, on your door," came the same muffled, somewhat familiar voice from behind the garbage. "Oh." I said, as light dawned. (Oops!) Embarrassed, I sheepishly left the confrontation at the end of the driveway and went to the door. There, right under the porch light was a red envelope taped to the door. I took it inside and the "Christmas Perpetrator" slunk away in the darkness, his identity still a mystery. Inside the envelope was a department store gift card for $250, with a note that said "This card will explode at the checkout if you purchase a DVD-VCR, so don't do it." And to think I imagined that Christmas might be boring. Wherever you are, Christmas Perp, I hope your days are jolly and that you know: at our home we're still grateful to you. Visit the author here: http://www.scrappermarylu.blogspot.com/ =======HeroicStories======= >-->From Kidwarmers: >THE FUNNIEST THINGS KIDS SAY _ J I N G L E \ (__ '.__`'-. B E L L S `'. \ __ .--._) | __..--''__``--../ \_/\.' .'`__..--`` ``--..\ \ / | ( '--' \ ;--. /\_/ \__ .--. \ \ /__`'--/\_/ \ '--' `'--\ / /----. '--`-----.`\ __) | .'__.' jgs /_( Carol's grandson, Matthew, 5, was on his way to Carol's house. He was singing Jingle Bells. When he came to "Jingle bells all the way" he was singing, "Jingle bells half the way." When his mom corrected him, he said,"Mommy, I don't feel good today, so I'm not going all the way, just half the way." -- Carol Davis of Winona, West Virginia Grandma Edie was taking 2-year old Stella for a walk. The neighbor has a blow up Santa and snowman on his roof. Stella said, "Look, there's Santa, but he's laying down." (He wasn't blown up!) Then she said, "Look, there's his underwear!" She was referring to the snowman that wasn't blown up. It was just a white puddle. -- Grandma Edie of Springfield, Oregon Jacob, 3, was leaving Mrs. Cathy's (his babysitter) house. He opened the door and quickly closed it. His mom said to go on out but he told her it was "too dusty out there." It was actually very foggy. -- Cathy (babysitter of Jacob) of Dillard, Georgia _____ .-"` `'. /, \ / /``'--..--'``\ | \__.__.__,___/ \_ {/ e e \} { `}() (__) ()| `/,_.-")("-._,\ { `--`==`--` } .'{ } }'. .' { } } '. / { { } \ ; , '-..____..-' , ; | ; : ; | | <`;._ _:_ _.> | | | `'|.-.|'` | | \_.'`}`'-.._||_||_..-{`'._/ {_.'`_) '-;-' (_`'._} | \--..__ : __..-/ | \___/ ``` \___/ '-;-..._____...-;-' | | | \ _ _ _|_ _ _ / /` ` ` | ` ` `\ \_._._/ \_._._/ |= | | =| jgs .-'-. | | .-'-. / | | \ \____,__/ \__,____/ Zach was riding with Nana, aunt and mother in the car. They saw a truck with a piece of marble for counter tops. The women remarked that it was "a pretty piece of marble." After a couple of minutes Zach said, "That's not a marble, marbles are round." -- Cathy (mother of Zach) of Dillard, Georgia On the same trip Zach was being a little wild in the car as it had been a long day with travel and visiting the Biltmore House. Zach was asking his mom a question. She just ignored him as she was a little frustrated. He then said, "If you don't answer me I am going to yodel!" Claire, 3, was up in Pap-pap's arms and spotted her mother's wedding portrait. She quickly said, "Mommy has a big old doughnut head!" Her mom's hair was in an up-do. -- Claire's Gigi of Garner, North Carolina _.-"""-. .' \ `\ .' .-' '. _ | /.__ ) C, ^ \ .' `'-. ( ;-.-' / '. ) | / \ / _., ; . ';-"`;_.'\ | '. \ | / .* ** *, |___ `'-..___.|__/--' * .--. * | ```"""-----'/ '*/_ _`\*'`\ )"""----....___.; _.`.|^.^ ?;` .' .' '.`'. .;-.-'\_- /-.',( / '. \ /_.' ;.| |'--....___ ___..--` \ .;' .-' .; L.._ __ ```` __..-' /; / `.' / ;._`__````""--""`` \ .'( _.'`.' /` 7 | ``""";--.._ | /`,'`'"".`"` '.' .' | 7 | | `' | \__.` '. _`;.' .' \__| .--'._; / |_`""-'` | .' \__/` jgs `'-.___.; .-; `\...._/-' {_}-' \ \ `-.._ | / `"-' Before her two grandsons returned to South Carolina following Thanksgiving weekend with their grandparents in Indiana, they wanted their favorite pizza. Zachary kept asking for more "Papa John's." His grandmother explained to him they weren't at that restaurant. Then it dawned on her. He wanted "Parmesan" to sprinkle on his pizza! -- Judy Lomax (grandmother) of Sellersburg, Indiana When driving on the Beltway in Houston the traffic was very busy. Kaylea, 6, said, "They look like a bunch of ants, going in and out with each other." -- Jean Felfe (grandmother of Kaylea) of Spicewood, Texas Stella, 2, has been saying the blessing on the food for more than a year now. In the past few months she has started praying to Heavenly Food instead of Heavenly Father. Her grandmother Suzy gently corrects her each time and she continues on with her blessing. Saturday she had been watching Dora the Explorer, Diego, etc. She started her prayer with "Heavenly Food." Suzy again gently corrected her to "Heavenly Father." Stella paused and said, "Handy Manny, Thank you for this food." (Handy Manny is a bi-lingual children's program.) -- Suzy Payne (Stella's Nana) of Springfield, Oregon /\ //\\ //||\\ // || \\ //\ || /\\ //'.\||/.'\\ //___> <___\\ //------------\\ // \\ // .-"-. \\ // ( (`\) \\ // '-/| `\ \\ // .-"-. / | || \\ // (.-. ) / | || \\ || / /)-' =`-.| || || ||/ / '-| .-""-. | =\| || |/ |'./ (__()__) | | || / /\====\ /==| |=|| /_.-' | >--< |-.-| || jgs |----' `-.-' || Alton, 4, was having a sleepover at Grandma's. At bedtime he peered out the window and then asked, "Grandma, was it a sunny day today?" She replied that it was overcast all day and it was not a sunny day. Alton said, "Well, it's a moony night!" -- Diane Schlemmer (grandmother of Alton) of LaGrange Koen, 4, has a Hispanic friend named Diego. Koen told his father Diego is "a funny name." His father replied that it is a Spanish name. Koen then asked if Koen is a Spanish name. His father said, "No, your name is German." Koen replied, "No, my name is Koen!" -- Dennis Smith (Koen's PawPaw) of Oak Ridge, North Carolina Koen was reciting the days of the week for his Nanna and PawPaw. He started with Monday and ended with Friday. When PawPaw asked him, "What comes next?" Koen replied, "Mommy and Daddy day." Koen and Lark, his little sister, were spending the night. Koen sat on the kitchen stool, and as his grandfather, Dennis, started things moving toward supper, they were talking about the bedtime songs his Mom sings to him. When Dennis asked him what songs she sang, Koen replied, "BLAH BLAH black sheep!" Andre was visiting his grandparents when he asked Great-Grandma Reese where Grandad was. She told him he was fixing supper. So he went running to the kitchen and then ran back to her to say, "Grandma, he is not fixing dinner, he is cooking dinner." -- Amy (mother of Andre) of Butler, Pennsylvania j. ':| g::. | s '::.| |. ':| '-...-' _....._ .-::. ':::-. .:. '::. '::. '. /'::. _::._::. :\ ;. '::'` `:' .::\ |::. / \.::'| | '::.| |' .| |. ':| |.::/ |::. | /__.' | '::.| |. ':| |::. | /`""-._ |_'::.| _.-''`\ | .__'/ `\'_. | | .-| |--. | | _.\ /._ | \_..-' /`\--'\ `-.._/ / | \ | | | / ; \ / \ \ | ;-.____/ \____/::.| |. ':| j::. | g '::.| s. ':| |::. | | '::.| '-..:-' When Andre was 4, he was staying with his grandparents. Grandad was working on the deck while Andre played in the house. Andre was desperate to get Grandad's attention. He started knocking on the glass door calling, "Grandad," but there was no response. So he got a bit more adamant and started calling his name, "Jim." Still no response, so he reverted to what Grandma called him, "Honey!" Here is another Andre story. When he was 4 while taking a walk with Grandma, after a rain, told her he had to walk around the "muddle puds!" Nolan, 4, was riding down the road with his mom and said, "Mom look at the tractor." Of course, she didn't see it because it was in a field. So Nolan said, "Aww, you missed it, you need to pay more attention." -- Lisa Billingsley (mother of Nolan) of, Scaly Mountain, North Carolina .... .::\:::. ::::)`\::: :::/ /::: ::| |::: ':\_/::' /`"'-:___ | _`\ | .-. ( \ ; , , , , \_) '--' | ( |\_.'/ )`-'\__,| \_)|\_/ .`(_ / `. (| _| . '_.-'` '--. `'. | (_)_' ( /.-. `\______(_)(_)`--' ` \/ jgs _). '-. '--._ _.-' . `) : ( `-. < ) . <'-. ' .-', _'._'. '-. '.-'` )'/ \/ \( `\( `; Mimi gives her grandchildren piano lessons. Eight-year-old Timmy played one piece well, so Mimi told him, "You've got that one down pat." Going on to another piece, Timmy said, "I've got this one patted down, too!" -- Carol Guise (Mimi) of Ocala, Florida Another Timmy story. When singing the hymn "Near the Cross" Timmy got a few words confused. Instead of "When my raptured soul shall find rest beyond the river," Timmy sang, "When my ransom note shall come just beyond the river." Sandi was babysitting her grandson, Max, 5, and ran his bath water. Then she hurried to the kitchen for a glass of cold water to drink before heading back to help him shampoo his hair. Suddenly Max called out down the hall, "Nana, hurry in here FAST! Some ants are in the bath tub!" Sure enough, a few tiny ants were crawling around on the side of the tub, so Sandi smushed them with her finger and told Max they were just sugar ants and wouldn't hurt him... they were only looking for something sweet to nibble on." His reply? "But I'm sweet; you always tell me I am. They might try to bite me!" -- Sandi Pound in Lehigh, Florida | _...._ \ _ / .::o:::::. (\o/) .:::'''':o:. --- / \ --- :o:_ _::: >*< `:}_>()<_{:' >0<@< @ `'//\\'` @ >>>@<<* @ # // \\ # @ >@>*<0<<< __#_#____/'____'\____#_#__ >*>>@<<<@<< [__________________________] >@>>0<<<*<<@< |=_- .-/\ /\ /\ /\--. =_-| >*>>0<<@<<<@<<< |-_= | \ \\ \\ \\ \ |-_=-| >@>>*<<@<>*<<0<*< |_=-=| / // // // / |_=-_| \*/ >0>>*<<@<>0><<*<@<< |=_- |`-'`-'`-'`-' |=_=-| ___\\U//___ >*>>@><0<<*>>@><*<0<< | =_-| o o |_==_| |\\ | | \\| >@>>0<*<<0>>@<<0<<<*<@< |=_- | ! ( ! |=-_=| | \\| | _(UU)_ >((*))_>0><*<0><@<<<0<*< _|-,-=| ! ). ! |-_-=|_ |\ \| || / //||.*.*.*.|>>@<<*<<@>><0<<@>>>>>| ( ~~~ )/ (((((((()))))))) ~~~~~~~~ '""""`------' `w---w` `------------' Kathy was preparing dinner, chicken in a nice sauce. As she was preparing the sauce, Jacob, 3, came wandering into the kitchen and asked her what she was doing. After she had told him, he remarked, "Don't forget to make me a peanut butter sandwich for supper, please!" -- Johanna Methot (Oma) of Peterborough, Ontario, Canada Here is another Jacob story: Somehow, somewhere, the car had encountered a nail and suffered a flat tire. Dad was busy replacing it, putting snow tires on the car in the process. Jacob was busy observing. Growing a bit tired of all the observing he asked his dad to please get him his "ride in jeep" from the shed. His father said no. Jacob replied, "Well, you are not my best buddy any more. I'll go and ask Mom!" Note: You are welcomed to use, copy and share these stories, but please reference http://www.funnykids.com as the source. ========================================================== >-->From Our Friend LouiseA :) .-----------------------------------------------------. | __ ___________________ | _________________ __ | || / / '.|.' \ \ || ||/ / ___ -= + =- \ \|| | / ******* .'|'. ___ \ | | / /-====) | ******* \ | || | / -( | (_.- )) || || / / _/ )- ) )) || || | |-( _ \_( (( || || / | \ //| _ )) ) ) || || / \ \/\/ |\\ /'-( ( || || | |\ / *** \/\/ / ) ) || || `-;./==;-' .=. \ / ( ( || || | \ _\/(_)\/_ '-;==) ) || || | \ |'---'| / ( ( || || | \ _| |_ / ) ) || || _/ | /\ /\ | ( ( || || .-/ / '=' \ ( )-. || |jgs `""---`-----` `----`----`""` || >Christmas Blessing Lord, bless those we love This Christmas day, Be they near... Or far away. Bless those good friends Who mean so much And those with whom We're out of touch. We bring them all To you in prayer And ask You to keep them In Your care. May you celebrate this beautiful season with love in your home, joy in your world, and peace in your heart! --- ...Amen! So nice! Thanks LouiseA! | | . , |_ . ,_ \_/ _,_, |__) _ _ _ _ / \,_ |_|_|_|_/_)| |_|_| |_\_| | (_) |_|_ | _(/_(_|_(__(/_ \__/| |_ __/ __ ___ (_ _ ,_-|-|_ _ ,_ _| | ,_ \_/ _,_, ,_ |__| _ _ ,_-|- (__(_|_|(_|_| |_ (_|_| |_(_|_ _|_| |_ | (_) |_|_|(_ | |_(/_(_|_|(_|_ _..._ _..._ .' _ '. .' _ './ (a) .-'-. / (e) .-'-. '-,-'` | '-,--'` / ; / ; | _ / |/ .\ _ (_\ __..;__ \ ::\ ,/_)._ _;\;``""----...___...---:"`` .-'_ `'. \ '::.()\__) (\())(`._'- `-._ ,:-" '. '. - : ; '::\--;__ _\()`''----...__ `-._ '-. '._ .' | .:::|()\_) (_/`;-. jgs _ ()`-. `""--...____..-'` ;_ .:::| `. \_) _;/_)/).;()'._ (`\.-();/_).__ .::::/().-./`) (_\`;(()(_/(()/(. __.--;();`\_)()\__) .::()--;__:() '-;---()_;\_/()"-._ (_/ (/ /()';();--._\_::'`.();\_)` ,() (_.-(); \._ ``""(_.();_().(`\.-();__)`(_/ `--.__ (_/ (_/() \_) __/(_/|\();__\_)` \_) ` (_/ \_)`-._); >Updated FUN STUFF URLS - Oh Yeah Shangy! ------------------------------------------------------------------------ http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/urls.html FUN URLS ------------------------------------------------------------------------ -->FULL LENGTH - FREE On line AUDIO MP3 Christian Foundational Class http://www.truthortradition.com/modules.php?name=News&file=article&sid=61 NEW LIFE IN CHRIST! ------------------------------------------------------------------------ -->This is for all you who love food and DARE to make it at home Yep. You guessed it - Recipes. These are Tried and True, Yummy to the Tummy, good old fashioned home cooking recipes that are EASY to do Visit Shangy's Easy-Does-It Home Recipes: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/easy.html Home Recipes >Got A good Recipe? SHARE IT HERE: Share A Recipe ************************************************************************ >TO SUBSCRIBE: Visit Here This Weeks regular Shangy emails OR For the Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com ************************************************************************