Cat Miracle Diet And More... :) Shangy! >Here are the details on our Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com To UnSubscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com Group home page: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ShangyFunList Through no fault of my own we suddenly became an adult club in the love and romance directory so you will have to confirm that you are an adult when you go here. I still have no idea how to change this back as it sends me around in a circle when I try! or Web Site: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/ShangyFunList.html Group email address: ShangyFunList@yahoogroups.com or email me here: bcrsystems@earthlink.net ================ :::::: .-~~\ :::::: |::::| / \ _ |::::| _ _ l~~~~! ~x .-~_)_ l~~~~! .-~ ~-. \ / ~x".-~ ~-. \ / _ / \ || _ ( / \ || || T o o Y || || T o o Y|| ==:l l < ! (3 ==:l l < !(3 \\ \ .__/ / /|| \\ \ ._/ / || \\ ,r"-,___.-'r.//|| \\,r"-,___.-'r/|| }^ \.( ) _.'//.|| }^\. ( ) _.-//|| / }~Xi--~ // || / }~Xi--~ // ||\ Y Y I\ \ " || Y Y I\ \ " || Y | | |o\ \ || | | |o\ \ || | | l_l Y T || | l_l Y T || | l "o l_j |! l "o l_j || ! \ || \ ||/ .--^. o .^||. .--^. o ||--. -Row " ~ `' " ~`' >-->Under The Gun... Many of our readers have been under the gun from the weather lately! We've had the blizzard of 2010 for the East Coast and flooding for California and our friends in Australia. We pray all of you are weathering well and are safe and sound through Christ Jesus our beloved Lord and Savior! >From Our Friend PatDeE :) Monday 27 December 2010 We have gotten through our first snowstorm/blizzard of the season. It looks to be about fourteen inches. An amazing amount of it accumulated in the backyard which is fenced in and provided a bit of shelter from the wind. I guess the snow here is eighteen inches or deeper. The top of the bird feeder was lifted and twisted by the wind and it is filled with snow! (I don't know how any snow landed because whenever I looked out the window it seemed to be going sideways.) BTW, one of the side effects I noticed is that our windows are sparkling clean. They were scoured by the snow which did a better job than me with Windex and paper towels! Not a smear in sight! It's not quite six a.m. so I'll have to wait a bit before I dig my way to the garage and fire up the snow blower. It's going to be a busy day...but God has given me the opportunity to exercise. Blessings, Pat --- o \ o `. o o o o \ ` -. .-.-. .---. .-.,-.,-. ..-. / )| | `'____\' o _____\|| ` `' | |-._--.| |----.| | o |o ||-.| ||,-. || | o o | ||_|| |/ oo\ || | | || || C ._)o || | o o| || ||o|\`-/ || | ,. o | ||_|| ,'\,\ || | _\('') | ||o||/\ \ .: o|| | (; .) | || |( \_\||___|| | _,.(|___)-. | o||_|||`-`,\)----' | o o | | ||..|.| o _ |-. _.-. `.-.|._|_.-:|__|_|-.-' `-'.__ o o '--`-` o - SSt ...Well, bless your heart PatDeE! I am pleased you noticed the windows. I always tell God it is His turn to water the plants in the extra dry of the summer so I think Father was taking 'His turn' at cleaning your windows. What a good job He did, huh? TeeHee! / / / .--. / / / / / \ / / / | /a / / / / / \ |/ / / / .-. / ) | / / / / __) / / / `. .--. / / / \| @( / | \ \ / // / / / / / .' \-/ / |\ \_|_\__ / -' / / / / | \' / | \___/)--) / / / / / \ \ / | | \ \ .-' / / / / \/) | | \.-' \ / (____\ /U\ _.---------'| `------._____________________/ \ \\__)-------._ -- '`--` VK Please take it easy with that snow cleanup. A little at time with that heavy load! I think it will wait for you. ;) ============================================================== >-->From TheFunnyBone: The Cat Miracle Diet _ Most diets fail because we are still thinking |\/(_ and eating like people. For those of us who / -`'. have never had any success dieting, well | =__-/= now there is the new Miracle Cat Diet! This / ( diet will also work on humans! Except for ; \ cats that eat like people -- such as getting / | lots of table scraps -- most cats are long and / , / lean (or tiny and petite). .' | | / --; | The Cat Miracle Diet will help you achieve | || __ the same lean, svelte figure. Just | /_;-` _`'. follow this diet for one week and you'll \ '-----' _.-` '._) find that you not only look and feel jgs `'-------'" better, but you will have a whole new outlook on what constitutes food. Good Luck! DAY ONE Breakfast: Open can of expensive gourmet cat food. Any flavor as long as it costs more the .75 per can -- and place 1/4 cup on your plate. Eat 1 bite of food; look around room disdainfully. Knock the rest on the floor. Stare at the wall for awhile before stalking off into the other room. Lunch: Four blades of grass and one lizard tail. Throw it back up on the cleanest carpet in your house. Dinner: Catch a moth and play with it until it is almost dead. Eat one wing. Leave the rest to die. `'. .'` Bedtime snack: Steal one green bean from your \_/ spouse's or partner's plate. Bat it around \ .;=;. / the floor until it goes under the --.'"-|-"'.-- refrigerator. Steal one small piece of /`-._|_.-'\ chicken and eat half of it. Leave the other / | \ half on the sofa. Throw out the remaining /_/ | \_\ gourmet cat food from the can you opened '----'`^`'----' this morning. DAY TWO Breakfast: Picking up the remaining chicken bite from the sofa. Knock it onto the carpet and bat it under the television set. Chew on the corner of the newspaper as your spouse/partner tries to read it. Lunch: Break into the fresh French bread that you bought as your part of the dinner party on Saturday. Lick the top of it all over. Take one bite out of the middle of the loaf. ,_ /) (\ _, Afternoon snack: Catch a large >> <<,_,>> << beetle and bring it into the house. // _0.-.0_ \\ Play toss and catch with it until \'._/ \_.'/ it is mushy and half dead. Allow '-.\.--.--./.-' it to escape under the bed. __/ : :Y: : \ _ ';, .-(_| : : | : : |_)-. ,:' Dinner: Open a fresh can of \\/.' |: : :|: : :| `.\// dark-colored gourmet cat food- (/ |: : :|: : :| \) tuna or beef works well. Eat |: : :|: : :; it voraciously. Walk from /\ : : | : : /\ your kitchen to the edge of (_/'.: :.: :.'\_) the living room rug. Promptly \\ `""`""` // throw up on the rug. Step in jgs \\ // it as you leave. Track foot- ':. .:' prints across the entire room. DAY THREE Breakfast: Drink part of the milk from your spouse's or partner's cereal bowl when no one is looking. Splatter part of it on the closest polished aluminum appliance you can find. Lunch: Catch a small bird and bring it into the house. Play with it on top of your down filled comforter. Make sure the bird is seriously injured but .--. not dead before you abandon __/ o ". it for someone else to deal ` ), "-._ with. |;;, "-._ ';;;,, ",_ "=-._ Dinner: Beg and cry until you ':;;;;,,..-``"-._`"-. are given some ice cream or milk /`/` `'"` in a bowl of your own. Take ///^\ jgs three licks/laps and then turn the bowl over on the floor. FINAL DAY Breakfast: Eat 6 bugs, any type, being sure to leave a collection of legs, wings, antennae on the bathroom floor. Drink lots of water. Throw the bugs and all of the water up on your spouse's or partner's pillow. Lunch: Remove the chicken skin from last night's chicken-to-go leftovers your spouse or partner placed in the trash can. Drag the skin across the floor several times. Chew it in a corner and then abandon it. Dinner: Open another can of expensive gourmet cat food. Select a flavor that is especially runny, like Chicken and Giblets in Gravy. Lick off all the gravy and leave the actual meat to dry and get hard. =============================================================== >-->From ArcaMax Jokes: _ ///-._ ////////-._ /////////////-. ////////////////`. //////////////// .'`. //////////////// . '.'`. '|`'//////////// . .'.::|` : `'/////// . '.':| | . . `'// ' _|- ::| |. .-._ . | . | .':: | |:|:| | ' ' '.::| | |:|:| :. . .'.':| | . |:|:| . | .._.::: : `':| | ' ////-:| |. . | '/////////-._ | . . : .//////////////-._ : : ///////////////////-._ |. |////////////////////////-._ | . . :`'//////////////////////////-._ | . _.-\\\\``'//////////////////////////-._ | /\\\\\\\\..``'//////////////////////////". : . . /. \\\\\\\\\. .``'///////////////////// .'`. : / _ \\\\\\\\\. ``'//////////////// . .'`. | . / (@) \\\\\\\\\. . . ``'/////////// . '.'::|. {`)._ '| _` .\\\\\\\-`:|#| . . ``'////// '. .'.:| `-{_/`| ||::. \\'`.:|:.|#| |#| . ``'/ ' .##:'::: `-| ||||| |`.'::|::|#| |#| |#| . . '| . .|##|'.:| pils | ||||| : .'::|:.'#| |#| |#| |#| | |##|'::| | ||||| .| .'.:|::.'' '#| |#| |#| . : ' |##|'.:| {`\:|||| : .'::|:_.:. . '#| |#| | .|##|'::: `-{_/'|_ |_.-'/}_/'-._ '#| :. |##:'.:| `'{._('}_)-' `-}_}(-._ . . | ' '` .'::| `-' `-.} /-._ . : .'.'_:-'\ `-}_}(-._ | . _.-')_(-' `-/_)`-.:.-{ \{-' `-{_'_)-'' ^ >Signs on Church Property: "No God-No Peace. Know God-Know Peace." "Free Trip to heaven. Details Inside!" "Try our Sundays. They are better than Baskin-Robbins." "Searching for a new look? Have your faith lifted here!" An ad for St. Joseph's Episcopal Church has a picture of two hands holding stone tablets on which the Ten Commandments are inscribed and a headline that reads, "For fast, fast, fast relief, take two tablets." When the restaurant next to the Lutheran Church put out a big sign with red letters that said, "Open Sundays," the church reciprocated with its own message: "We are open on Sundays, too." "Have trouble sleeping? We have sermons-come hear one!" A singing group called "The Resurrection" was scheduled to sing at a church. When a big snowstorm postponed the performance, the pastor fixed the outside sign to read, "The Resurrection is postponed." "People are like tea bags-you have to put them in hot water before you know how strong they are." "God so loved the world that He did not send a committee." "Come in and pray today. Beat the Christmas rush!" "When down in the mouth, remember Jonah. He came out all right." "Sign broken. Message inside this Sunday." "Fight truth decay-study the Bible daily." "How will you spend eternity-Smoking or Non-smoking?" "Dusty Bibles lead to Dirty Lives" "Come work for the Lord. The work is hard, the hours are long and the pay is low. But the retirement benefits are out of this world." "It is unlikely there'll be a reduction in the wages of sin." "Do not wait for the hearse to take you to church." "If you're headed in the wrong direction, God allows U-turns." "Looking at the way some people live, they ought to obtain eternal fire insurance soon." "This is a ch_ _ ch. What is missing?" "Forbidden fruit creates many jams." "In the dark? Follow the Son." -<>- \_/ --(_)-- . / \ /_\ |Q| .-----' '-----. __ /____[SCHOOL]___\ ())) | [] .-.-. [] | (((()) ..|____|_|_|____|..................................)(... ldb >Give Bubba a Chance It was graduation night at Cox High School and they were about halfway through the ceremony when the principal said, "Ladies and Gentlemen, we have a problem, Bubba is a few credits short and won't be able to graduate tonight." Well now, Bubba was the starting right guard for Cox's football team, and when the student body heard that he wasn't going to graduate, they all jumped up and started to chant, "Give Bubba another chance, give Bubba another chance!" Pat Dye and the principal had a quick conference and afterward, the principal announced that they have decided to give Bubba another chance. Bubba is told that he will be given a "One Question" math test and if he passes, he can graduate. The question is, "What is 2 plus 3?" Bubba thinks for about 20 minutes and finally says, "I have it! The answer is 5!" There is complete silence in the auditorium for a couple of seconds and then the entire Cox High School football team jumps up and begins to chant, "Give Bubba one more chance. Give Bubba one more Chance!" -<>- .... .: :..:::::' ..:.::'''' ''' .. . . .':: ::'' .. .. .::'' ''' ':::' .::.':: .'..::::::. ..:.::::: '.. :.'.:''' ...:''' '':'::':' '' :^ ^ 'o> .:''' :..' '. ''''':: ': ......... : :. ...::''' ' ' '''::. .:: ':::.:':''''' :::':. .::' ::: ::' ::. ...::. .::' . '''.' . :. '::. ::... . .'.''':::. ':. ....:::::':::::. ':::.. .:' .:'.:.'::::::' ' ':::.. ':::::. ....:::::.. .:::::::'' ' '':. '':' .':.:.:::::::'. ...:: '' .'.'' .':'::' LGB .::' .'':: ' ':':'.. . '''.' >Deer Hunting Two hunters were dragging their dead deer back to their car. Another hunter approached pulling his along too. "Hey, I don't want to tell you how to do something ... but I can tell you that it's much easier if you drag the deer in the other direction. Then the antlers won't dig into the ground." After the third hunter left, the two decided to try it. A little while later one hunter said to the other, "You know, that guy was right. This is a lot easier!" "Yeah, but we're getting farther from the truck," the other added. -<>- >Eight Iron Off the seventh tee, Joe sliced his shot deep into a wooded ravine. He took his eight iron and clambered down the embankment in search of his lost ball. After many long minutes of hacking at the underbrush, he spotted something glistening in the leaves. As he drew nearer, he discovered that it was an eight iron in hands of a skeleton! Joe immediately called out to his friend, "Jack, I've got trouble down here!" "What's the matter?" Jack asked from the edge of the ravine. "Bring me my wedge," Joe shouted. "You can't get out of here with an eight iron!" -<>- >Hair Cut Boss: You got your hair cut on company time. Susie: It grew on company time. Boss: Not all that hair. Susie: I didn't get it all cut. -<>- >Car Privileges The mother and father had just given their teenage daughter family-car privileges. On Saturday night she returned home very late from a party. The next morning her father went out to the driveway to get the newspaper and came back into the house frowning. At 11:30 AM the girl sleepily walked into the kitchen, and her father asked her, "Sweetheart, what time did you get in last night?" "Not too late, Dad." she replied nervously. Dead-panned, her father said, "Then, my precious one, I'll have to talk with the paperboy about putting my paper under the front tire of the car." -<>- >Inscribed in stone over doors of an old church ... Inscribed in stone over the great front doors of an old church being restored was: “This is the Gate of Heaven.” Just below it someone had placed a small cardboard sign which read: “Use Other Entrance.” ============================================================== >-->From Our Friend PaDeE :) I got twenty-one right. Aha! .-*'\: `-._/ .' .' ; .-' `._ .' / `-. `. / .-' `+. `. .' / .'\ `-. ; / / `. ` \ | _.' : \ \ | `-.-'/ _ '|\ \ ; ; `. : / / / .' `./.: ; ,|;: | \ \ . .-' .' .-'/ ;|| ::| | `. ; ; : / / .-' .' / :: ' :\ ,: | ,*"*-:' / /.'.-*' .'; ', / ; ; \ :.-*"*. |'TP' .-'.'' / .-' , //.' : ' . : '.s$P`| ; / .' .'/ .' .' <_.' ` |/ : '\ T$P : |/_.-*" /.'.-' ___ \ ___ |/ db. `. | .-'_.-' ; .' s$$$$$s ; s$$$$$s ; d$$ `-.+-; .'.-'_.-*' d$b T$$$$$P T$$$$$P/.d$$$b , /.'.-'\ \ ;/ $$ """ : """ ` $$ TP / : .' \ /, d$$ ; $$b / |/ [bug] ,:-. \ .-*' ' |; \__;`. ,' . `. / :__/ : | ; ; : | : `._ _.' ; "*--*" ` ` ' \ \ .-*--*-. / \ ;*""**""*: / `. :`. .'; .' \ `.`""'.' / `. `""' .' `.__.' >HOW OBSERVANT ARE YOU? CLICK ON THE BELOW LINK AND TAKE THE TEST. http://www.oldjoeblack.0nyx.com/thinktst.htm THE NORMAL RATE IS 7 OUT OF 25. GOOD LUCK! BE SURE TO FORWARD TO YOUR FRIENDS . NOT MANY PEOPLE SCORE MORE THAN 5. that would really be lame.....if you are in that range, keep it to yourself that you are a self centered wanker --- -="""--.._ ""--...._\ ,b:--....---. || //'""------"' _.l+----.// .&$""' .'"=.. '. / | | ) \ _.-'@_.' '@_/ | .' " \ -._,-'^"""^'-, `. ,\""---___ |.. _.--._, \ .-"(,_\_""" _.' ' _,-; '"` ` " """' """' | |__ ,+ |-.`o o'"/| #| oO Oo"./ (#| | "|_, | '|> \ / `l ,' |,-----||' pjy lj lJ o@o o@o " " ...You got me! Only 19 here. Thanks PatDeE! -<>- _.-""""-. ( ': '. .___.' : : _.."----".._ .-" "-. ." ". .":.".. .' `. : '.' : :" "": : .-" .'""-: .-"""-. :": : : ". .' `. : " '-._ : : _:" : : "" : : : : _ : : : '. : : : `#. ' : : _:. : '. ' `#. : grp : '._ .' : . ." .-" :"-._ _.-" (_. '. ""------"" (_.: . : '.:`-' .::"- .:::::. .':::::::: ' `::::' " Mr. Bounce >British hospitality An American tourist in London decides to skip his tour group and explore the city on his own. He wanders around, seeing the sights, occasionally stopping at a quaint pub to soak up the local culture, chat with the locals, and have a pint of bitter. After a while, he finds himself in a very nice neighborhood with big, stately residences...no pubs, no stores, no restaurants, and worst of all NO PUBLIC RESTROOMS. He really, really has to go, after all those Guinnesses. He finds a narrow side street, with high walls surrounding the adjacent buildings and decides to use the wall to solve his problem. As he is unzipping, he is tapped on the shoulder by a London police officer, who says, "I say, sir, you simply cannot do that here, you know." "I'm very sorry, officer," replies the American, "but I really, really have to go, and I just can't find a public restroom." "Ah, yes," said the policeman..."Just follow me". He leads the American to a back delivery alley to a gate, which he opens. "In there," points the policeman. "Go ahead sir, anywhere you like." The fellow enters and finds himself in the most beautiful garden he has ever seen. Manicured grass lawns, statuary, fountains, sculptured hedges, and huge beds of gorgeous flowers, all in perfect bloom. Since he has the policeman's blessing, he relieves himself and feels much more comfortable. As he goes back through the gate, he says to the police officer, "That was really decent of you... is that what you call English hospitality?" "No sir...", replied the police officer, "...that is what we call the French Embassy." --- ...HaHA! Thanks PatDeE! -<>- /\ / \ _-| ,' \ _,m; | d| L _mdMP' | dM| | ,dMMMF | dMM| | dMMMMF .' ,MMM| |-'""`-./`QMM| | |MMMJ | | `.RP"| ,' |MMMMl |,-;'`. |\`.| ,/ ,d| |MMMM'\,',' \ | `.|'/,MMF |MP"` / / \ | | q/ _t| /,' _____ | /___ | ,' -' `.| | / _._\ |'|,m.)|<:_ ,' ,-'| | \ |MMMD `^"'.| `. | / | |__`>`''-'"".\ | | |,'____\ `---'_--'" ` / \ `. /-' |--._ .__--"' (, ) \ |-'\ | \\-. //`-' `. /| || || \ __// | / | >``--[ | \_-""".,/`._\ | ,' | |-' `\ ,' / ,' |,' | |,----..' ( /`. ' `. ||____|| `-' `. > `-..._|.m. _.m| / `.._.qMMMMMMMD CMMM| / `VML. `V' | VMML..___.,-' | | ,mmm._ /| | ,dMMMMP""``-.___,-' | | ,dMMMMP"' / _.- | dMMMMMMb | | | dMMMMMMMb. / | | ' `"qMM| `. | _,-` `M` `-.___.,^----' | `. | |' | .' `-_ _| | | | `-._____,-' `\_J |md| |MMb |MM| ,mmMMMMMMMUD |MMMMMMSmr. hjm `"qMMMMP"' `"""^^^^^" >Paradoxical thought for the day "Fathom the odd hypocrisy that Obama wants every citizen to prove they are insured; but people don't have to prove they are citizens." - Ben Stein - Congressmen should wear uniforms like NASCAR drivers so we can identify their corporate sponsors. --- ...I like It! Thanks PatDeE! ================================================================= >-->In The Worldly News: >From Taipan Daily: Editor's Note: Happy Holidays! During this special time, Taipan Daily is bringing you an assortment of "best of" selections, looking back on the year 2010. For better or worse (mostly worse), 2010 was the year of the Federal Reserve. Fed Chairman Ben Bernanke probably got more face time -- and exerted more influence -- than any other public official. In keeping with that, our "best of" today takes a look back at "The Hollow Men." Exposing the Hollow Men by Justice Litle, Editorial Director, Taipan Publishing Group The hollow men are not here to serve you or me. They are here for their masters. And it has been that way since at least 1913. Read the rest... http://tinyurl.com/2fo3gwr -<>- >From BizarreNews: Here is the kind of story you love to read around Christmas. A bin had been sitting at Blue Grass Recycling in Kentucky for months, maybe even years, before Mike Rodgers started sorting the contents. When he got to the bottom what, to his wondering eyes should appear, but a small parcel of unusual looking papers. Further investigation revealed them to be 40-year-old U.S. Savings Bonds worth $22,000! So did he clap himself on his back for his good fortune and cash them in? No. He conducted a lengthy search on his own time which finally resulted in him finding the original purchaser, or rather her son, an 82-year-old man now living in Florida. Robert Roberts, the son of Martha Dobbins, had no idea his mother had accumulated the bonds. "I was totally surprised," he said. "I had taken care of my mother for several years before she died and she never mentioned anything about any bonds." How the bonds ended up at Blue Grass Recycling is something of a mystery, but the money is a much-welcomed Christmas surprise for Roberts. As a token of his gratitude Roberts offered a reward to Rodgers for his honesty and his effort, but Rodgers refused. "I didn't do it to get anything out of it," Rodgers said. "It makes you feel good to be able to do something like this, especially at Christmas." -- That's not Santa hanging from the eaves -------- WEST WARWICK, R.I. - A Rhode Island man, tired of hanging Christmas lights, is letting a dummy finish the job. Carlos Vargas of West Warwick stuffed clothes to make an effigy and hung it from his rain gutter at the point where the lights stop, making the figure look like it was fall- ing off a ladder, The Providence (R.I.) Journal reported Tuesday. It looks so realistic people stop their cars and come running to offer help, Vargas said. Some have left notes saying the apparent emergency could cause an accident. Vargas said people have told him they reported him to the police, but so far no one has asked him to remove the display. The police and town hall officials say they had heard no complaints. One motorist stopped, took pictures and asked Vargas how to copy the display on his own house. -- Collector buys card from nuns --------- HADDONFIELD, N.J. - A New Jersey collector said he bought a rare Honus Wagner baseball card from an order of Baltimore nuns after an auction winner reneged on a $220,000 bid. Nicholas DePace, 57, a Haddonfield cardiologist who owns one of the most valuable sports memorabilia collections in the country, said he was contacted by auction officials Monday after the original high bidder backed out of paying the School Sisters of Notre Dame for the card, The Philadelphia Inquirer reported. DePace, who said he originally stopped bidding on the card when the price became too high, said he changed his mind when he heard proceeds from the sale were destined for the order's ministries in 30 countries. "This is the most famous Honus Wagner card now because it's going to help thousands of people, and that's more than any other Honus Wagner card has ever done," DePace said. ============================================================== >-->From AndyChaps: Christmas Leftovers... ____ ___ _.--"""-, / ) / \ .' `\ / _\ / \/ \ / .-' / _ | /.-.--.-.-.)/ / ( )\_ .\|(_._.__._._) / \,' \/ \ \ / : , | 0 _ 0 |/ : \ _/ (_) |`\ ,' `; "\ \ / / | | | /'. '._.' .' / \_,' .( '-----'` .'-. '-._ .-'\ '. [ `''''') ) `\ { ( ( ,\ / /\ '-..-'/ ; .-' ( '. / | .' ) `;---'` | /' /__.-' } / / O ' '----' ; / ! ___ { ! }/ \ ( _--- / | ___----'(__ .-' !\___/ .---' / .-.--' '------'------ --( ____)/ _-' (;(;;---'' (_(_(;; miraculis /jgs ** Merry Christmas Dear Ladies ** If I were ol' Santa, you know what I'd do I'd dump silly gifts that are given to you. And deliver some things just inside your front door Things you have lost, but treasured before. I'd give you back all your maidenly vigor, And to go along with it, a neat tiny figure. Then restore the old color that once graced your hair Before rinses and bleaches took residence there. I'd bring back the shape with which you were gifted, So things now suspended need not be uplifted. I'd draw in your tummy and smooth down your back Till you'd be a dream in those tight fitting slacks. I'd remove all your wrinkles and leave only one chin, So you wouldn't spend hours rubbing grease on your skin, You'd never have flashes or queer dizzy spells, And you wouldn't hear noises like ringing of bells. No sore aching feet and no corns on your toes, No searching for spectacles when they're right on your nose, Not a shot would you take in your arm, hip or fanny, >From a doctor who thinks you're a nervous old granny. You'd never have a headache, so no pills would you take, And no heating pad needed since your muscles won't ache, Yes, if I were Santa you'd never look stupid, You'd be a cute little chick with the romance of a cupid. I'd give a lift to your heart when those wolves start to whistle And the joys of your heart would be light as a thistle. But alas! I'm not Santa, I'm simply just me, The matronest of matrons you ever did see, I wish I could tell you all the symptoms I've got But I'm due at my doctor's for an estrogen shot. Even though we've grown older this wish is sincere, Merry Christmas to you and a Happy New Year! -<>- ** Short Takes ** An English professor announced to the class; "There are two words I don't allow in my class. One is gross and the other is cool." From the back of the room a voice called out, "Yeah? So, what are the words?" -<>- My wife and I were traveling on the Kansas Turnpike, fighting 35 to 45 m.p.h. crosswinds all the way... At a tollbooth, I asked the attendant, "What do you people do in Kansas when the wind quits?" She didn't miss a beat. She answered, "We take the rocks out of our pockets." -<>- Benny complained, "Doc, I've been to three other clinics and none of them agreed with your diagnosis." The doctor calmly replied, "Just wait until the autopsy, then they'll see that I was right." -<>- "I hate it when my foot falls asleep during the day, because that means it's going to be up all night." ~~- Steven Wright -<>- The tightened airport security has taken a saddening turn as they refused to let a 73-year old grandmother on a plane because she had two 7" knitting needles in her possession..... they feared she would make an Afghan! -<>- \o _ ___|\_ _____/_\-_ _____________ ,--. _____________________ mmm-. \ _________________________ ((\ )____________________________ )6(\ )__________________________ \ _`) )____________________________ _ =o= ) ))__________________________ ( (__/) ) )______________________ _/ ( ( \ \ ______________________ _(=.|\ |)=.|____________________ ___\ \ ) / |______________________ ____| / / |____________________ _____|_,/ (`;-. |\ ___________________ _______ / |\ `' \______ _,/)_____ _______ / ' ` \ ____/_/)/_________ _______ / \ _______/ \ ________________ ______ / \ ______/ \ ______________ __ / `. . \ ____; \ \ )____________ / ` \ \ ) ___; ' ` \ )________________ / : ; ,-. ,' ___;__,-. ; . . /"""`-='_______________ gpyy /_,`-=-.___,.__,-=-''"""'` _____________________________________________ >** Give ** (Author Unknown) The more you give, the more you get -- The more you laugh, the less you fret -- The more you do UNSELFISHLY, The more you live ABUNDANTLY . . The more of everything you share, The more you'll always have to spare -- The more you love, the more you'll find That life is good and friends are kind . . . For only WHAT WE GIVE AWAY, ENRICHES US FROM DAY TO DAY -<>- __,...__ _,-'::::::::`-. ,'::,----._::::::`. ,'::,' /\,-. \:::::::`. /::::| ; | |:::::::::`. |:::::`._ \ |:::::::::::\ __\,:--''--`_--':::::::::::::\ `'--::__:::::::`-:_:::::::::::::\ /--.`'--:_:::::`-::::::::::::\ /,-_.' _`-:_::::`:::::::::::\ / /o\| ,-_`-.`--:::`::::::::::) || \_/| / /o\\ `:,'''-:' (#__`-_/ | \_/| /##| ,-.\ ,'' `-. `.__/ ,'###| / || / \ , (##### / || | |___,-##\ /##/ \__,'/ \ /########) |#,'|__..-' `-..__..-'######) / \`.###'`""' / \\\__// ,' \`--' _,-' jrei `-..___..--'' >** Why Dogs Can't Use Computers ** #10. He's distracted by cats chasing his mouse. #9. SIT and STAY were hard enough; CUT and PASTE are out of the question. #8. Saliva-coated floppy disks refuse to work. #7. Three words: carpal paw syndrome. #6. Involuntary tail wagging is a dead give-away that he's browsing www.purina.com instead of working. #5. The fire hydrant icon is simply too frustrating. #4. He can't help attacking the screen when he hears "You've Got Mail". #3. It's too messy to "mark" every Web site he visits. #2. The FETCH command isn't available on all platforms. #1. He can't stick his head out of Windows MS. -<>- >** New Virus Afflicts Many ** Just got this in from a reliable source and I thought I should share it with all of you. It seems that there is a virus out there called the Senile Virus that even the most advanced programs from Norton cannot take care of, so be warned, it appears to affect those of us who were born before 1958! Symptoms of Senile Virus..... 1. Causes you to send same e-mail twice. 2. Causes you to send blank e-mail. 3. Causes you to send to wrong person. 4. Causes you to send back to person who sent it to you. 5. Causes you to forget to add the file. 6. Causes you to hit "SEND" before you've finished the ~~~ Just One Question from Andy... Do you have it??? I do, I'm Afraid says Andy. -<>- >** Your morning thought for the day: ** ,-.-. / ,-. \ ,-. ( |a a| ) ,-. : `( : o ; )' : ____|____(_.>-<._)____|____ (_| / \ |_) || : `.|,' : || '|___..--|_\_|_/_|-...___|' ; | /SSt\ | : / ; ;| ,'|`. |: : \ / /| /|;._____.:|\ |\ \ / ,' `' / ;| |: \ `' `. \ `' / / | | \ \ `' / / ; : \ \ / / /| |\ \ \ / / / | | \ \ \ / / / ; : \ \ \ / / / /| |\ \ \ \ ( / / / | | \ \ \ ) `(_ / / ; : \ \ _)' `'.(_./___\._).`' Christmas gift suggestions: To your enemy, forgiveness. To an opponent, tolerance. To a friend, your heart. To a customer, service. To all, charity. To every child, a good example. To yourself, respect. ~~ -- Oren Arnold -<>- ** Success in marriage is more than finding the right person, it is becoming the right person. ** "Often the difference between a successful marriage and a mediocre one consists of leaving about three of four things a day unsaid." - Ogden Nash -<>- >** Name That Baby ** When Diane found out she was pregnant, she told the good news to anyone who would listen. But her 4-year-old son overheard some of her parents' private conversations. One day when Diane and her 4-year-old were shopping a woman asked the little boy if he was excited about the new baby. "Yes!" the 4-year-old said, "and I know what we are going to name it, too. If it's a girl we're going to call her Christina, and if it's another boy we're going to call it quits!" -<>- [t][v][p][1] _.-`''`-._ ,` `. __________________________ | ,._-'''-. | | Ogladalnosc Serialu | | |,-. ,-.| | | "Plebania" wynosi 0,03% | |/' `-| < i nadal zajebiscie rosnie!| \ (_) / `--------------------------' \ ____ / \ `--` / _.--`/'|`-..-'|\''''`-. ,-' / |`._,' / \ \ | / \,/``\/ \ | \ | | '> |\,/| <' ,' \ | `/^)\ |/`\| / / \ / / / \ | | / | \ / / ,``, \ \ / / | \ ' | | \ \ / / |\_ \ / ,| _.' \ | | |__...-'` | \ / / `. | |````` | \ | / ,`') | |\ | | ,` ,/\ | _,:''`, | ---\,,.-'`---------| _/ ,` , \ ,'--gan---------- |_.------''/ /; ,` |/ `' ```''' >** Today's Stock Market Report ** Helium was up, feathers were down. Paper was stationary. Fluorescent tubing was dimmed in light trading. Knives were up sharply. Cows steered into a bull market. Pencils lost a few points. Hiking equipment was trailing. Elevators rose, while escalators continued a slow decline. Weights were up in heavy trading. Light switches were off. Mining equipment hit rock bottom. Diapers remain unchanged. Shipping lines stayed at an even keel. The market for raisins dried up. Coca Cola fizzled. Caterpillar stock inched up a bit. Balloon prices were inflated. Scott Tissue touched a new bottom. And batteries exploded attempting to recharge the market. Mergers: In the wake of the Exxon/Mobil deal and the AOL/Netscape deal, here are the latest mergers we can expect to see: 1. Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush, and W.R. Grace Company merge to become Hale Mary Fuller Grace. 2. Polygram Records, Warner Brothers, and Keebler Crackers merge to become Polly-Warner-Cracker. 3. 3M and Goodyear merge to become MMMGood. 4. John Deere and Abitibi-Price merge to become Deere Abi. 5. Zippo Manufacturing, Audi Motors, Dofasco, and Dakota Mining merge to become Zip Audi Do Da. 6. Honeywell, Imasco, and Home Oil merge to become Honey I'm Home. 7. Denison Mines, and Alliance and Metal Mining merge to become Mine, All Mine. 8. Knott's Berry Farm and the National Organization for Women merge to become Knott NOW ========================================================== >-->From CleanLaffs: .-----. / '. ' .\ |_.__'_.|} (=(_)^(_)=) ;, > ,; ;;;~~~;;; ___.';;;;;'.__ /'`\ `\ /` /`'\ / | | | | \ jgs( | |\_/| | @~ ) | | | | | | | /| | | |\ | \ || | | || / ( || | | || ) | || |___| || | \ ||___|[_]|___O| / | | / \O| | Stuck in rush-hour traffic, I couldn't help but stare at a burly-looking biker wearing a black leather jacket and chaps pulled up next to me on a shocking pink Harley. My first thoughts were, "Is that really a pink Harley?" and, "I wonder if he's gay." Just then the traffic cleared, and he pulled in front of me. On the back of his jacket were stenciled the words, "Yes, it is. No, I'm not." -<>- A man by the name of Tates designed the very first compass for large-scale production and sale in the United States. It was a very significant achievement, but alas, it proved not to be too reliable and many people who relied on it became hopelessly lost. It did however, cause a saying which is very much in use today to be developed... He who has a Tates is lost. -<>- .-""""-. ////||\\\\ |/ \| ( @ @ ) | C | \ == / `|--|` .--`\__/`--. / \ / , , \ /`-./| |\.-'\ There is an old story about a mother who walks in on her six-year-old son and finds him sobbing. "What's the matter?" she asks. "I've just figured out how to tie my shoes." "Well, honey, that's wonderful. You're growing up, but why are you crying?" "Because," he says, "now I'll have to do it every day for the rest of my life." -<>- Speedy Morris was the basketball coach at LaSalle and they were having a pretty good season. One morning he was shaving and the phone rang. His wife answered it and called out to him that Sports Illustrated wanted to talk to him. Coach Morris was excited that his team was apparently about to receive national recognition in this famous sports maga- zine. As a matter of fact, he was so excited that he cut himself with his razor. Covered with blood and shaving lather and running downstairs to the phone, he tripped and fell down the stairs. Finally, bleeding and bruised, he made it to the phone and breath- lessly said, "Hello?" The voice on the other end asked, "Is this Speedy Morris?" "Yes, yes!" he replied excitedly. Then the voice continued, "Mr. Morris, for just seventy-five cents an issue, we can give you a one-year subscription to Sports Illustrated." -<>- Although this married couple enjoyed their new fishing boat together, it was the husband who was behind the wheel operating the boat. He was concerned about what might happen in an emergency. So one day out on the lake he said to his wife, "Please take the wheel, dear. Pretend that I am having a heart attack. You must get the boat safely to shore and dock it." So she drove the boat to shore. .-. ,-"""-, / \__ \ | / `\ | \( ^.^ )/ \ - / .-'|;---;|-. (\/ ||___|| `\ \\__/ \__| C|`----`|D __//| | | |====( | | | | _/_/___.---- .===| |====\ /===. | ('------') ( '----' ) | jgs | | Later that evening, the wife walked into the living room where her husband was watching television. She sat down next to him, switched the TV channel, and said to him, "Please go into the kitchen, dear. Pretend I'm having a heart attack and set the table, cook dinner and wash the dishes." -<>- A lawyer walks into his client's death row cell and says, "I've got good news, and bad news for you.. " The prisoner says. " Okay. What's the bad news? " "The bad news is that the Governor won't issue a stay of your execution...you go to the chair at 7 PM tonight." "Oh, that's horrible. What possibly could be the good news?" "The good news is that I got your voltage reduced!" ========================================================== >-->From JokeCentral: _._ /.-.\ /(/~\)\ \\>-- >It's A Vocational Thing A pipe burst in a doctor's house. He called a plumber. The plumber arrived, unpacked his tools, did mysterious plumber-type things for a while, and handed the doctor a bill for $600. The doctor exclaimed, "This is ridiculous! I don't even make that much as a doctor!" The plumber waited for him to finish and quietly said, "Neither did I when I was a doctor." -<>- sSSSSSSs SSS'\\\\SS SSS` - -'SS SS(, a \a S SSSSS -' |S 'SSS\ '= /S/| 'S|`-. __.' / | .-'| `-.__.' .-\ / /-. | | { _/ \_ } | | `| | | | | '. | | .' jgs '-.| |.' `"` >The Irish Surgeon An Irish surgeon who had couched a cataract and restored the sight of a poor woman in Dublin, observed in her case what he deemed a phenomenon in optics; on which he called together his professional brethren, declaring himself unequal to the solution. He stated to them that the sight of his patient was so perfectly restored, that she could see to thread the smallest needle, or to perform any other operation, which required particular accuracy of vision; but that when he presented her with a book, she was not capable of distinguishing one letter from another! This very singular case excited the ingenuity of all the gentlemen present, and various solutions were offered, but none could command the general assent. Doubt crowded on doubt, and the problem grew darker from every explanation, when at length, by a question put by the servant who attended, it was discovered that the woman never learned to read! -<>- __________ |DAILY NEWS| |&&& ======| |=== ======| |=== == %%$| |[_] ======| |=== ===!##| ejm97 |__________| >Strange Headlines & News Bloopers The Door is the Window to the Home. Air Force to Get New Uniforms: New Camouflage Really Stands Out We're offering the best hearing aid money can buy at unheard of low prices. Tight End Returns After Colon Surgery. (In the Sports Section). Weather Conditions to Determine When Rain Will Stop. MAN MINUS EAR WAIVES HEARING (Richard Lederer) BE SURE TO EAT RIGHT BEFORE SURGERY (Richard Lederer) ALZHEIMER CENTER PATIENTS PREPARE FOR "AN AFFAIR TO REMEMBER" (Tom Deno) LAWMAKERS BACK TRAIN THROUGH IOWA (Richard Lederer) HALF OF U.S. HIGH SCHOOLS REQUIRE SOME STUDY FOR GRADUATION (Richard Lederer) Mrs. Marion Parker who is chairwoman of the County Breeders Association announced plans for a livestock show. She will show her own cows and heifers and will also show her calves to interested farmers. (Newscaster, Kermit Schafer) From a medical Report: This 54-year-old female is complaining of abdominal cramps with BMs on the one hand and constipation on the other. (Richard Lederer) From a Medical Report: This patient has been under many psychiatrists in the past. (Richard Lederer) Today, crowds of thousands cheered as Pope Pius XII stood at his bedroom window in St. Peters Square and exposed himself. (Don Smith, WBAL, Baltimore) Midget Sues Employer for Belittling Remarks. -<>- _..-,--.._ ,`. ,',',' `. `. `,/`/ \ :'.`: : ____ _ _ __ | |`| | _( `.) ( ( )`. : `-' ; _ ( ( ) )) ( ( )) ,\_ _/. (`',' ( ( ) _) `-(__.' '. ```------''' .` '.__)--' .-.. |``-...____...-''| (_)_)) | | ,'`. ___...---| |--..._ ,'`. ,'`. ,' _`.---''' | | " -'..._`. `. /`-._ " " | _ | ```-..`./:::::) `-...||______...-' " /:::_.' " " " _.:.''' " " SSt (I am so December.......................Joke Master) Pick the month that you were born and put it in the subject line. Then forward it to everyone you know including the person that sent it to you. They might understand you better! JANUARY: Ambitious and serious. Loves to teach and be taught. Hardworking and productive. Smart, neat and organized. Sensitive and has deep thoughts. Knows how to make others happy. Highly attentive. Resistant to illnesses but prone to colds. Loves children. Has great social abilities. Very stubborn and money cautious. FEBRUARY: Loves reality. Intelligent and clever. Changing personality. Humble. Honest and loyal. Determined to reach goals. Loves freedom. Rebellious when restricted. Loves aggressiveness. Daring and stubborn. Ambitious. Realizing dreams and hopes. Sharp. Loves entertainment! and leisure. Romantic on the inside, not on the outside. Superstitious and ludicrous. Spendthrift. MARCH: Attractive personality. Affectionate. Secretive. Naturally honest, generous and sympathetic. Loves peace and serenity. Sensitive to others. Loves to serve others. Revengeful. Loves to dream and fantasize. Loves traveling. Loves attention. Hasty decisions in choosing partners. Loves special things. Moody. APRIL: Decisive and haste but tends to regret. Strong mentality. Diplomatic. Consoling, friendly and solves people's problems. Brave and fearless. Loving, caring, generous. Emotional. Aggressive. Good memory. Moving, motivates oneself and others. Sickness usually of the head and chest. MAY: Stubborn and hardheaded. Strong willed and highly motivated. Sharp thoughts. Easily angered. Attracts others and loves attention. Deep feelings. Beautiful mentally.. Firm standpoint. Needs no motivation.. Easily consoled. Systematic (left brain). Loves to dream. Understanding. Sickness usually in the ear and neck. Good imagination. Weak breathing. Loves traveling. Dislikes being at home. Restless. Hardworking. High spirited. Spendthrift. JUNE: Thinks far with vision. Polite. Having lots of ideas. Sensitive. Active mind. Funny and humorous. Loves to joke. Good debating skills. Talkative. Daydreamer. Friendly, knows how to make friends. Abiding. Able to show character. Easily hurt. Prone to getting colds. Easily bored. Fussy. Seldom shows emotions. Takes time to recover when hurt. Executive. Stubborn. JULY: Fun to be with. Secretive. Quiet unless excited or tensed. Takes pride in oneself. Has reputation. Honest. Concerned about people's feelings. Tactful. Friendly. Approachable. Emotional, temperamental and unpredictable. Moody and easily hurt. Witty and sparkly. Forgiving but never forgets. Guides others mentally. Sensitive and forms impression scarefully. Caring and loving. Treats others equally. Strong sense of sympathy. Wary and sharp. Judges people through observations. Hardworking. Waits for friends. Not aggressive unless provoked. Prone to having stomach and dieting problems. Loves to be loved. Easily hurt but takes long to recover. AUGUST: Loves to joke. Caring, brave and has leadership qualities. Knows how to console others. Too generous and extraordinary spirit. Observant. Careful and cautious. Independent thoughts. Loves to lead and to be led. Loves to dream. Sensitive, romantic. Loving and caring. Loves to make friends. SEPTEMBER: Careful, cautious and organized. Concerned and detailed. Trustworthy, loyal and honest. Does work well. Sensitive. Thinking generous. Good memory. Clever and knowledgeable. Loves to look for information. Must control oneself when criticizing.. Able to motivate oneself. Understanding. Fun to be around. Secretive. Loves leisure and traveling. Tends to bottle up feelings. Systematic. OCTOBER: Loves to chat. Inner beauty. Does not lie or pretend. Sympathetic. Treats friends importantly. Always making friends. Easily hurt but recovers easily. Daydreamer. Emotional. Decisive. Loves to travel. Loving and caring, romantic. Touchy Concerned. Loves outdoors. Just and fair. Spendthrift. Loves children. NOVEMBER: Has a lot of ideas. Difficult to fathom. Thinks forward. Unique and brilliant. Extraordinary ideas. Sharp thinking. Fine and Dynamic in personality. Secretive. Inquisitive. Always thinking. Less talkative but amiable. Brave and generous. Patient. If there is a will, there is a way. Determined. Never give up. Get angry very quickly. Sharp-minded. Motivates oneself. High-spirited. Deep love and emotions. Romantic. Hardworking. Trustworthy. Honest and keeps secrets. Unpredictable. DECEMBER: Loyal and generous. Patriotic. Ambitious. Influential in organizations. Fun to be with. Loves to socialize. Loves praises. Loves attention. Loves to be loved. Honest and trustworthy. Not pretending. Changing personality. Hates restrictions. Loves to joke. Good sense of humor. Logical. --- ...I am April, Paul is September :) -<>- >-->Fun Places To Net Visit :) New Year Animations... http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/agifs_k-o.html Words: New Year Animations http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/agifs_u-z.html When Sandman Attacks http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/sandman.html Up Close And Personal! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/personal2.html Look Who's Talking 4 http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/talking4.html Best Playmate! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/playmate.html World's Largest Rodent! http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/caplin.html TSA's Calendar Gals! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/tsa.html Playboy Bunny Calendar! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/calendar.html -<>- >From Our Friend PatDeE :) Twas The Night Before Christmas - IN BROOKLYN http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TPK-Kjf-mQo --- ...LOL! Thanks PatDeE! -<>- >From Our Friend GaimLdy :) my aunt sent to me........... Nobody Can Make This Stuff Up! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OAQ8NGnS3Ds --- ...Oh My! And We PAY that dude! Amazing! Thanks GaimLdy! -<>- >From Our Friend Wesley :) ripped : customize your IKEA furniture | Mykea http://tinyurl.com/2a8d55c Read your Favorite Books by e-mail http://xrl.in/2o1e Auto-Forward your E-Mails to Your Cellphone as Text Messages ! http://xrl.in/2o1g Free Games for Mobile Phones ! http://xrl.in/1umx --- ...Wonderful! Thanks Wesley! -<>- >From LynnLynn's Links: Ping Pong http://www.buffaloschips.com/jlkfd.htm Ping http://www.buffaloschips.com/fjdks.htm Piscina http://www.buffaloschips.com/fgdw.htm Rabbit VS Snake http://www.buffaloschips.com/asdasc.htm Rally Flip http://www.buffaloschips.com/dasms.htm Eskimo Dating Hazards http://www.buffaloschips.com/sdlksdkjs.htm Ever Notice http://www.buffaloschips.com/sdflkfkss.htm Exercise http://www.buffaloschips.com/lkdskllksdf.htm Financial Planning http://www.buffaloschips.com/lijjh.htm If You haven't joined LynnLynn's mailing List yet, send a blank e-mail to LynnLynns-links-subscribe@Yahoogroups.com ==================================================== >-->Quotes & Thunkers: "Scientists say they have located the gene that causes obesity. Yeah. His name is Gene Millman and he invented Krispy Kreme douighnuts." -Conan O'Brien "Here's a great story: A guy in Alaska goes fishing and he catches a 90-year-old fish, a 90-year-old fish. You know, I look at it this way — if I want a 90-year-old fish, I'll just order the seafood platter at Red Lobster." -Dave Letterman "I was in McDonald's and I saw this kid take his Happy Meal toy and throw it on the ground. His mom said, 'Hey, you play with that. There are children in China who are manufacturing those!'" --Laura Silverman "I have a Y chromosome that makes me ask, Why get married? But I wouldn't want to put down marriage as a whole - which it is." --Kevin Hench "I like hip-hop. I'm working with Ice Cube, Ice-T, and Herb Tea. I'm changing my name to Snapple." --Paul Mooney "Ummm... a malt Glen Garry for me and my friend here. And if you tell that bartender to go extra easy on the water, this 50 cent piece has your name on it." --Vince Vaughn in SWINGERS "Bad cholesterol is the kind that clogs arteries, shoplifts lipstick and lies under oath." A peculiar posting appeared one day on the company bulletin board. It read: Used tombstone for sale. Ideal for Person Named "Murphy." What did one skunk say to the other skunk when they were cornered? "Let us spray." Each day comes bearing its own gifts. Untie the ribbons. - Ruth Ann Schabacker "Why should people go out and pay good money to see bad films when they can stay at home and see bad television for nothing?" (Samuel Goldwyn) I wear my wife's eyeglasses because she wants me to see things her way. My wild oats have turned to shredded wheat. "Prayer is not a way of making use of God; prayer is a way of offering ourselves to God in order that He should be able to make use of us." - William Barclay >Updated FUN STUFF URLS - Oh Yeah :) Shangy! ------------------------------------------------------------------------- http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/urls.html FUN URLS ------------------------------------------------------------------------- -->BECOMING A CHRISTIAN HOW TO BE A CHRISTIAN! ------------------------------------------------------------------------- -->FULL LENGTH - FREE On line AUDIO MP3 Chriistian Foundational Class http://www.truthortradition.com/modules.php?name=News&file=article&sid=61 NEW LIFE IN CHRIST! ------------------------------------------------------------------------- -->This is for all you who love food and DARRE to make it at home Yep. You guessed it - Recipes. These are Tried and True, Yummy to the Tummy, good old fashioned home cooking recipes that are EASY to do :) Visit Shangy's Easy-Does-It Home Recipes: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/easy.html Home Recipes >Got A good Recipe? SHARE IT HERE: Share A Recipe ************************************************************************ >TO SUBSCRIBE: Visit Here This Weeks regular Shangy emails OR For the Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com ************************************************************************