Everyone Needs A Log And More... :) Shangy! >Here are the details on our Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com To UnSubscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com Group home page: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ShangyFunList or Web Site: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/ShangyFunList.html Group email address: ShangyFunList@yahoogroups.com or email me here: bcrsystems@earthlink.net ================ *~* A REMINDER: PLEASE Send me sweet, interesting, funny, inspiring, family type forwards ANY TIME here... bcrsystems@earthlink.net I Need them, Love them, Use them, and Share them! THANK YOU!! AND For Facebook Users: Please Friend Me / Like Me here... http://tinyurl.com/cma6all AND For Google Plus Users: You can find me here... Shangy Bigham https://plus.google.com/106648555948034085752/posts AND Please Share This email with All Your Friends And Family! ^~^ May God SUPER BLESS You As You Do! THANK YOU! :) -<>- * NOTE: An easy way to adjust the size of print in email or any page is to hold down the Ctrl tab while moving the scroll button on the mouse. You can also use the keyboard to change the font size in your web browser or emails. Hold down the Ctrl key while pressing the + key for larger text or the - key for smaller text! ================ >-->2 HOT Off The 'Shangy' Press :) W __ __ [ ] |::||::| 3 ._. |::||::| ._. /| |:| ._. |::||::| |/| \|// / |:|_|/| |::||::|_ |/| -( )-| |:|"|/|_|::||::|\|_|/| _ J V | |:|"|/|||::||::|\|||/||:| ___ ' / ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ \ \/ | ~~~ ~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~ We have two new 9/11 pages sure to warm your heart! This first one is from our friend Melinda. It is as heartwarming as it is heart-wrenching! You may want a tissue for this one. Don't miss the video - helps with the sadness... 9/11 Tribute! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/tribute.html This next one is from our friends Melinda and LouiseA. It is an eyeopener one that you may have seen before but is always timely. Also, be sure to watch the video. I didn't realize they played such a big part! So many heroes that day! 9/11 Where God Wants Me! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/wheregodwantsme.html --- ...These are so beautiful! Great additions! Thank you Ladies! -<>- You'll find this Interesting too... W __ __ [ ] |::||::| E ._. |::||::| ._. |\ |:| ._. |::||::| |/| \ \\|/ |:|_|/| |::||::|_ |/| |-( )- |:|"|/|_|::||::|\|_|/| _ | V L |:|"|/|||::||::|\|||/||:| \ ` ___ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ | \/ / ~~~~ ~~~~ ~~~ ~~~ Just when you thought God had forgotten... A Sign on 9/11/2015 http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/2015/9-11in2015.jpg More Info On this Here: http://tinyurl.com/o74py5f ======================================================= >-->From TheFunnyBone: ____ 3 _ ., _ ' `_ _______ ( ) --+-[---------.---(-)-----(@)----|-------|--.-----|-------------.-------|~-- | ] | |~ |~ (@) _ | | |} | | --+-[-----|---+---|-------|--|--(@)---------+-----|----------|}-+---|---|--- |/ | | | | | |~ (@) _ | | _| .. | | | | --Y-------|---+---|-------|--|--|---|---(@)-+-|>( )------|---|--+---|------- /|_ _| | `=_| | | |~ | ~ |>(@) | _| |-@-)---(@)---+-----------------|---|---|---+-------------------+-(@)------- \_|/ ~ | | | | | ~ --+-----------"-------------------------|---"-------------------"----------- | ._} --jw CHILDREN'S ANSWERS IN MUSIC EDUCATION. These are stories and test questions accumulated by music teachers in the state of Missouri, circa 1989. Source: Missouri School Music Newsletter. * It is important to be able to reach the brakes on any piano. * Just about any animal skin can be stretched over a frame to make a pleasant sound once the animal is removed. * It is easy to teach anyone to play the maracas. Just grip the neck and shake him in rhythm. * My favorite instrument is the bassoon. It is so hard to play people hardly ever play it. That is why I like the bassoon best. * I would like for you to teach me to play the cello. Would tomorrow or Friday be best? * The plural form of musical instrument is known as orchestra. * Tubas are a bit too much. * A contra-bassoon is like a bassoon, only the opposite. * The most dangerous part about playing cymbals is near the nose. * The flute is a skinny-shape-high-sounded instrument. * Instrumentalist is a many-purposed word used by many player-types. * Anyone who can read all the instrument notes at the same time gets to be the conductor. * The main trouble with a French horn is it's too tangled up. * For some reason, they always put a treble clef in front of every line of flute music. You just watch. * The concertmaster of an orchestra is always the person who sits in the first chair of the first violins. This means that when a person is elected concertmaster, he has to hurry up and learn how to play a violin real good. * Question: Is the saxophone a brass or a woodwind instrument? Answer: Yes. * Last month I found out how a clarinet works by taking it apart. I both found out and got in trouble. * A bassoon looks like nothing I have ever heard. * Cymbals are round, metal CLANGS! * Question: What are kettle drums called? * Answer: Kettle drums. * When electric currents go through them, guitars start making sounds. So would anybody. * The double bass is also called the bass viol, string bass, and bass fiddle. It has so many names because it is so huge. * While trombones have tubes, trumpets prefer to wear valves. * A trumpet is an instrument when it is not an elephant sound. * Another name for kettle drums is timpani. Or else you can just stick with the first name and learn it good. * Instruments come in many sizes, shapes and orchestras. * You should always say 'chili' when you mean there are two or more cellos. * A tuba is much larger than its name. * A harp is a nude piano. * My favorite composer is Opus. * My very best liked piece of music is the Bronze Lullaby. * Probably the most marvelous fugue was the one between the Hatfields and the McCoys. * Most authorities agree that music of antiquity was written long ago. * Morris dancing is a country survival from times when people were happy. * A good orchestra is always ready to play if the conductor steps on the odium. * Caruso was at first an Italian. Then someone heard his voice and said he would go a long way. So that's why he came to America. * I know what a sextet is but I'm not allowed to say. * Music sung by two people at the same time is called a duel. * When a singer sings, he stirs up the air and makes it hit any passing eardrums. But if he is good, he knows how to keep it from hurting. * In the last scene of Pagliacci, Canio stabs Nedda who is the one he really loves. Pretty soon Silvio also gets stabbed, and they all live happily ever after. * An opera is a song of bigly size. * Aaron Copland is one of your most famous contemporary composers. It is unusual to be contemporary. Most composers do not live until they are dead. * Henry Purcell is a well known composer few people have ever heard of. * Beethoven wrote music even though he was deaf. He was so deaf he wrote loud music. He took long walks in the forest even when everyone was calling him. I guess he could not hear so good. Beethoven expired in 1827 and later died from this. * Handel was half German, half Italian, and half English. He was rather large. * John Sebastian Bach died from 1750 to the present. * A virtuoso is a musician with real high morals. * Refrain means don't do it. A refrain in music is the part you better not try to sing. * Agnus Dei was a woman composer famous for her church music. ======================================================= +------------ BIZARRE HOLIDAYS ------------+ September 14 is National Cream-Filled Donut Day September 15 is Make a Hat Day September 16 is American Legion Day and Mayflower Day September 17 is National Apple Dumpling Day and Constitution Day September 18 is POW/MIA Recognition Day September 19 is National Butterscotch Pudding Day and Oktoberfest September 20 is National Women's Friendship Day ======================================================= >-->From GoodCleanFun: //////////////////////// ////////////////////////| //////////////////////// | ////////////////////////| | | _\/_ | _\/_ | | | )o(> | <)o( | | | _/ <\ | /> \_ | | | (_____) | (_____) | |_ | ~~~oOo~~~ | ~~~0oO~~~ |/__| _|====\_=====|=====_/====|_ || |_|\_________ O _________/|_||| ||//////////|_|\\\\\\\\\\|| || || || |\_\\ || || ||/|| \\_\\ ||/|| ||/|| \)_\) ||/|| || || \ o / || || || \ / || LGB || || ________ \________/====== / ( || ) \ >Egg Broke One morning my sister woke up to see her two-year-old son standing beside her bed. He said "Egg broke." She promptly scolded him. "How many times have I told you not to touch the eggs?" His immediate reply was "One, two, three..." as he pointed to a finger with each number. Of course, the scolding was immediately over as she tried to stifle the laughter! -<>- >Keeping Your Money Safe Dad is from the old school, where you keep your money under the mattress -- only he kept his in the underwear drawer. One day I bought my dad an unusual personal safe, a can of spray paint with a false bottom, so he could keep his money in the workshop. Later I asked Mom if he was using it. "Oh, yes," she replied, "he put his money in it the same day." "No burglar would think to look on the work shelf!" I gloated. "They won't have to," my mom replied. "He keeps the paint can in his underwear drawer." -<>- >NYC Directions I found New York City immense and confusing on my first trip there. One evening during the rush hour, I stopped at a newsstand in the heart of Times Square and asked the vendor which direction was north. "Look, buddy," he replied in a loud and annoyed voice. "We got uptown, we got downtown, and we got cross-town. We don't got north." -<>- >Saving Money Faced with hard times, the company offered a bonus of one thousand dollars to any employee who could come up with a way of saving money. The bonus went to a young woman in accounting who suggested limiting future bonuses to ten dollars. -<>- >Tell Me A businessman had a tiring day on the road. He checked into the local hotel and, because he was concerned the dining room might close soon, left his luggage at the front desk while he went immediately to eat. After a leisurely dinner, he returned to the desk to retrieve his luggage and realized he had forgotten to pick up his key. He also had forgotten his room number. So he said to the clerk on duty, "Hello, I'm Henry Davis. Can you tell me what room I'm in?" "Certainly, sir," replied the clerk. "You're in the lobby." ========================================================= >-->From Our Friend LouiseA :) ___ .-" "-. .' . ; `. / : . ' : \ | ` .-. . ' | | : ( ) ; ` | | : `-' : | \ .` ; : / hjw `. . ' .' `-.___.-' >SMILES After starting a new diet, I altered my drive to work to avoid passing my favorite bakery. I accidentally drove by the bakery this morning and, as I approached, there in the window were a host of goodies. I felt this was no accident so I prayed ... "Lord, it's up to you, if you want me to have any of those delicious goodies, create a parking place for me directly in front of the bakery." And sure enough, on the eighth time around the block, there it was! God is so Good! -------- A motorist was driving down the highway and all of a sudden he hit a sparrow. He pulled over, picked the poor sparrow who was still alive, but unconscious. He decided to take him home. When the motorist got home, he put the sparrow in a cage, leaving him some bread and water inside. When the sparrow came to, he looked around and said: "Bars, bread, water... Oh my goodness!! I have killed the motorist!!!" -------- A Ballerina goes to the doctor, "Doc I am having terrible trouble with the most awful wind. Every time I pirouette I fart", she cries. "Hmmm," says the Doctor, "I'd like to see that if possible" The ballerina get up, pirouettes and Phrrrt... farts loudly. "That's amazing, do it again." Again the pirouette is accompanied by a loud fart. "Hmmm," says the Doctor "I think I may be able to help" he bends down and picks up a long pole with a curious hook on the end. The ballerina starts back in alarm, "What the heck are you going to do with that?" she asks. "Open the window, it stinks in here for gosh sake!" -------- Ken sets up his friend Mike on a blind date with a young lady-friend of his. But Mike is a little worried about going out with someone he's never seen before. "What do I do if she's really unattractive?" says Mike. "I'll be stuck with her all night." "Don't worry," Ken says, "just go up to her door and meet her first. If you like what you see, then everything goes as planned. But just in case you need to escape, there's a 'Bad Date Rescue App' you can install on your smartphone. Schedule your phone to ring just after you meet her and answer with, 'Mom, what's the matter, are you okay?" It works every time. So that night, Mike knocks on the girl's door and when she comes out he is awestruck at how attractive and sexy she is. He's about to speak when the girl's phone rings and she answers with, "Mom, what's the matter, are you okay?" ------- A blonde is driving around in her red sports car and suddenly gets pulled over by the police. The policeman approaches the car holding the ticket and pen ready and says: "Young lady, you've been driving almost double the speed limit. Give me your name please." "Hmmph!" - says the blonde looking very irritated "And what am I going to be called then?" -------- A Filipino pilot who became well known for his absent-mindedness was invited to pilot a new flying boat. The pilot had a good time flying. After spending a couple of hours in the air, the pilot decided that it was time to land. He was about to make a landing on the ground when his assistant reminded that they were supposed to land on the sea. "Yes, I know. I was just testing you," answered the pilot. "I am not that absent-minded." So the flying boat made a safe landing on the water. Having accomplished this, the pilot, being proud for not committing a big mistake, opened the door and stepped into the sea. -------- The 75-year-old man sat down in the orthopedic surgeon's office. "You know, Doc," he said, "I've made love in more exotic cars than anyone I know. Must be at least a thousand." "And now, I suppose, you want me to treat you for the arthritis you got from scrunching up in all those uncomfortable positions," the medic said. "Heck, no," the old fellow replied. "I want to borrow your Lamborghini!" -------- Vandals had set fire to a farmer's haystack which then spread to his barn. While he surveyed the wreckage, his wife called their insurance company and asked them to send a check for £30,000 the amount of insurance on the barn. "We don't give you the money," a company official explained. "We replace the barn and all the equipment in it." "In that case," replied the wife, "cancel the policy I have on my husband." ------- Rodney walks into a bar and says, "Bartender, give me two shots. One for me and one for my best buddy here." The bartender says, "You want both drinks now or do you want me to wait until your buddy arrives to pour his?" Rodney says, "Oh, I want them both now. I've got my best buddy in my pocket here." With that he pulls out a little 3 inch man from his pocket. The bartender says, "Wow! And you mean to say he can drink that much?" "Oh, sure. He can drink it all, and then some," the man retorted. So the bartender poured the two shots. Sure enough, the little guy drinks it all up. "That's amazing," says the bartender. "What else can he do? Can he walk?" Rodney flicks a quarter down to the end of the bar and says, "Hey Al go fetch that quarter." The little guy runs down to the end of the bar, picks up the quarter, and runs back down and gives it to Rodney. The bartender is totally amazed by this display. "That's amazing," he says, "what else can he do? Does he talk?" Rodney looks up at the bartender with a look of surprise in his eye and squawks, "Talk? Sure he talks. Hey Al, tell him about that time we were in down in Africa on safari and you insulted that witch doctor. -------- Two weeks ago I read that smoking can kill you; the next day I stopped smoking. Last week I read that too much red meat can kill you; the next day I stopped eating red meat. Yesterday I read that drinking can kill you; this morning I stopped reading. -------- A monastery in Europe is perched high on a cliff several hundred feet in the air. The only way to reach the monastery was to be suspended in a basket, which is pulled to the top by several monks, who pull and tug with all their strength. Obviously the ride up the steep cliff in that basket was terrifying. One tourist got exceedingly nervous about halfway up, as he noticed that the rope by which he was suspended was old and frayed. With a trembling voice he asked the monk who was riding with him in the basket how often they changed the rope. The monk thought for a moment and answered brusquely, "Whenever it breaks." -------- A woman loses both ears in an accident. A plastic surgeon she consults tells her that ear transplants are still in the testing stage, but he will do what he can. The woman undergoes the operation, and after a time she returns to the surgeon's office to have the bandages removed and the stitches taken out. After examining her, the doctor tells her everything seems to have gone well, and she seems pleased with his work. The next day, however, she calls the plastic surgeon in a rage. "You know what you did?" she screams. "You gave me a MAN'S ears." "Well," says the surgeon, "an ear is an ear. What's wrong? Can't you hear?" "I hear everything," she says. "The problem is I don't understand anything I'm told." ------- _.-. _.----' `. / `. / `-._ .' __.----. `-._ .-' / `-._ = // / `-. = // .' `--.= // .' // VK >Blonde's Year in Review January Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight. February Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels..... Helllloooo!!!.......bottles won't fit in printer!!! March Got really excited.....finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months..... Box said ' 2-4 years!' April Trapped on escalator for hours ... Power went out!!! May Tried to make Kool-Aid.....wrong instructions.... 8 cups of water won't fit into those little packets!!! June Tried to go water skiing....... Couldn't find a lake with a slope. July Lost breast stroke swimming competition..... Learned later that the other swimmers cheated- they used their arms!!! August Got locked out of my car in rain storm..... Darn car filled up with water because convertible top was open. September The capital of California is 'C'.....isn't it??? October Hate M & M's.....They are so hard to peel. November Baked Thanksgiving turkey for 4 1/2 days ... Instructions said bake 1 hour per pound and I weigh 108!! December Couldn't call 911. 'Duh'.....there's no 'eleven' button on the stupid phone!!! ------- ._ .-' `-. .-' \ ; .-'\ ; `._.' ; | | | ; : ; : ; : / / ; : , ; | .-"7| .-'" : .-' .' : .-' \ .' .' `. .' `-. ""-.-'`"" `",`-._..--"7 ; . `-.J `-, ;"`.;|,_, ; _.' | `"" `. ."""--. o \:.-. _.' ."" : ,--`; , `--/}o,' ; ; .___.' / ,--.`-. `-..7_.- /_ \ : `..__.._; .'__; `---..__.-'-.`"-, .' `--. | \_; \' `-._.-") \\ `-, `. -.`_): `. `-"""`. ;__.' ;/ ; " `-.__7" `-..._.'`7 -._;' ``"-'' `--.,__.' fsc >How to Wash Your Cat Some people have the misconception that cats never have to be bathed - that somehow they "lick" themselves clean. Well, contrary to this popular belief, cats do NOT have some enzyme in their saliva that resembles Tide (with or without bleach). Cats, like their nemesis, the dog .... do get dirty and have a variety of odors... from smelling like the outhouse where you camped last year to the same odor as your dog's breath. (Remember... your dog will try to eat anything.) Now we all know that cats HATE water. And we know that giving the cat a sedative to ease this process of a bath is out of the question. So, the best approach is both sneaky and direct. Remember now, this is not the dumb dog who can be led to tub with lies and a trail of Kibbles and Bits. Although your cat has the advantage of smarts, quickness and total lack of concern for you .... you have the advantage of size, strength, and the ability to wear protective garments. 1. First .... dress for the occasion. A 4-ply rubber wet suit is suggested, along with a helmet, face mask and welders gloves. 2. A bathtub with a glass enclosure is preferred to the one with a shower curtain. A frenzied cat can shred one of these in about 3.5 seconds. 3. Have the Kitty Bubbles and towel in the enclosed bathtub area before hand. No ... blow-drying the cat after the bath is not suggested. 4. Draw the water, making it a little warmer than needed as you still need to find the cat. Position everything strategically in the shower, so you can reach it even if you are face down or prone in the tub. 5. Find your cat. Use the element of surprise. Pick the cat up, nonchalantly as if you were simply carrying him/her to the supper dish. No need to worry about the cat noticing your strange attire... the cat barely notices you anyway. 6. Once you and the cat are inside the bathroom .... speed is essential. In one single liquid motion, shut the door to the bathroom, step into the shower, close the sliding doors, and drop the cat into the water. While the cat is still in a state of shock, locate the Kitty Bubbles and squirt whatever part of him/her is above the water line. You have just begun the wildest 45 seconds of your life. Remember that cats have no handles and add the fact that he now has soapy fur. His state of shock has worn off and he's madder than a wet hornet. 7. As best you can, wearing welder's gloves, try to field his body as he catapults through the air toward the ceiling. If possible, give another squirt of Kitty Bubbles with his body now fully exposed. 8. During the 5 seconds you are able to hold onto him/her, rub vigorously. No need to worry about rinsing. As he slides down the glass enclosure into the tub, he will fall back into the water, rinsing him/herself in the process. 9. Only attempt the lather and rinse process about 3 times. The cat will realize the lack of traction on the glass by then and will use the next attempt on the first available part of you. 10. Next, the cat must be dried. No...this is NOT the easiest part. By this stage, you are worn out and the cat has just become semi-permanently affixed to your right leg. We suggest here that you drain the tub and in full view of your cat, reach for the bottle of Kitty Bubbles. 11. If you have done step 10 correctly, the cat will be off your leg and hanging precariously from your helmet. Although this view of the cat is most disgusting, he will be in a much better position for wrapping the towel around him/her. 12. Be sure the cat is firmly wrapped in towel before opening tub enclosure. Open bathroom door .... put towel wrapped cat on floor and step back quickly into tub, if possible, and do not open enclosure until all you can see is the shredded towel. 13. In about 2 hours .... it will be safe to exit the bathroom. Your cat will be sitting out there somewhere looking like a small hedgehog, while plotting revenge. --- ...LOL! Got a kick out of these! Thanks LouiseA! My cat goes bizzerk just by me putting the flea medicine on the back of her neck once a month. Takes almost the whole month before she will trust me again! ========================================================= >-->In The Worldly News: >From ChristianPost: This is what common core is indoctrinating our children with: 7th Grade Students Required to Write 'Allah Is the Only God' in Tennessee Public Schools - Mother writes... "It really did bother me that they skipped the whole chapter on the rise of Christianity and they spent three weeks just studying Islam," Porterfield told Fox News. "But what really did bother me, because I understand that Islam needs to be discussed in history, was that they did this assignment where they wrote out the Five Pillars of Islam, including having the children learn and write the Shahada, which is the Islamic conversion creed." "I don't know if I would consider it an attack on Christianity, but they don't study any other religion to this extent," Porterfield continued. "I spoke with the teacher and the principal. They are not going to learn any other religion, doctrines or creeds and they are not going back over this chapter. Even though they discuss Christianity a little bit during the Middle Ages, they are not ever going to have this basis for Judaism or Christianity later." Read more at http://tinyurl.com/p68yzz5 -<>- >From AFA: If you rely on the mainstream media to inform you, there's a good chance you're in the dark on events of great importance to Christians. To find your way out, you need a news source that will shed light and share truth – and AFA has the answer: OneNewsNow.com. http://tinyurl.com/q42plv4 -<>- >From The Tea Party: Police: “If you’ve seen this before, I suspect it’s been on your mind. If you haven’t seen it, I recommend it,” wrote Rowe, current host of CNN’s Somebody’s Gotta Do It and former host of the Discovery Channel series Dirty Jobs. http://tinyurl.com/nbhb8ml After Iran's leader issued a chilling threat to Israel, Benjamin Netanyahu fired back in a MAJOR way ... In Part - 'Khamenei is not giving supporters of the agreement any room for illusion. He has made it clear that the US is the Great Satan and that Iran intends to destroy the State of Israel.' Read the rest here... http://tinyurl.com/pde3yj6 Sarah Palin just asked Donald J. Trump for a job. http://tinyurl.com/oomblwb The Philadelphia Eagles just cut Tim Tebow from their final roster despite him throwing and running for touchdowns during the preseason... but it's Tebow's very bold response that is gaining lots of attention. http://tinyurl.com/o6sc5w6 -<>- >From BizarreNews: [Why alcohol in excess is so dangerous] So a Detroit man was stabbed by his drunk father-in-law. Bizarre? Sort of. It is Detroit after all, and it was his father-in-law. How many fathers-in-law like their sons-in- law? But the reason he stabbed him... Police in Oakland County say a man was stabbed by his father- in-law after finding the 47-year-old man nude, in bed with his wife--the man's own daughter. The 25-year-old man told police that he had arrived home and discovered his wife and her father completely nude, laying together in bed. The man woke up his father-in-law and got into an altercation that continued outside of the home. That's when the older man, since identified by police as Henry Allen Michael of Detroit, allegedly stabbed the younger man in the back with a knife. After the stabbing, Michael got into his son-in-law's vehicle and fled the scene. After interviewing the victim, deputies located his wife. The 24-year-old woman told police that she and her father were out drinking and when she arrived back at the house, she passed out. She did not know what had happened until her husband woke her up, police said. The woman told police she had reason to believe that she was S assaulted. Michael, who was staying at the couple's home after being released from prison (for robbery and assault with a dangerous weapon), was later arrested and is lodged at the Oakland County Jail on pending charges. -<>- There is a stereotype that women are bad drivers. That may or may not be true, but a woman who was caught on video abandoning her vehicle in the middle of the street, in the middle of traffic, while in motion, is not helping the reputation of women drivers in general. The California woman caused a bizarre accident on a busy road by jumping from her car and allowing it to roll into oncoming traffic. The woman who was accused of being drunk, was identified as 22-year-old Jasmine Lacey. She was seen on video abruptly stopping her car on the busy highway. The driver behind her, who caught the incident on his dash- board camera, narrowly avoided hitting the car. After getting out of her car, the woman started to casually walk along the road while her car continued to roll and finally veered into traffic. The car hit two SUVs before going off the road, and stopped when it hit two trees. Lacey was arrested and booked for DUI, but she was released after police said that there was insufficient evidence to support the charge. Apparently you don't have to be drunk to abandon your vehicle in motion and let it wander by itself into oncoming traffic. It HELPS! But you don't have to be. *-- Man Stops Burglars with Samurai Sword --* An Arizona homeowner foiled two teen burglars with a samurai sword after coming home early in the morning and finding them inside his house. One of them, a 16-year-old male, fled the scene. The homeowner used the sword, known as a katana, to detain the other teen, forcing him to wait on the couch until police arrived. Deputies took the 15-year-old into custody and later arrested the second teen. One of the teens showed deputies where he discarded a backpack used during the burglary. The backpack contained about $900 worth of items taken from the house. "They are fortunate that this case ended with them just being arrested and that they were not injured by the homeowner who came home to find them burglarizing his home," a Pinal County sheriff said. *-- Police Pull Loaded Gun from Woman's P*!$& --* If this story sounds familiar to regular Bizarre News readers, it is because almost the exact same thing happened a couple of years ago. police in Waco, TX pulled a loaded handgun from a woman's v*!$& after a traffic stop led to a drug bust, officials said. During the stop, officers found 2.7 grams of methamphetamine and arrested the driver. While being trans- ported to jail, the suspect reportedly told an officer she had a Smith and Wesson .22-caliber semiautomatic handgun lodged inside her v*!$&. A female officer who retrieved the gun reported that the weapon had a round chambered and a full magazine of bullets. The woman was charged with unlawfully carrying a weapon. I would have to look it up, but if Texas is a concealed carry state she probably would have gotten away with it. You can't get much more concealed than that. Or maybe it was a rape prevention device? *-- Spanish police say seized pot plants are getting them high --* OLOT, Spain - Police in a Spanish town are complaining of feeling the "effects of smoking something illegal" as a result of smelling seized marijuana stored at their station. USPAC, the union representing police officers in the northeastern town of Olot, said the 2,000 marijuana plants seized during the summer are being stored in locations including the underground parking lot and some police offices due to lack of space and the smell from the plants have been making officers ill. The union said the "unbearable smell" from the plants has caused "discomfort" and "headaches" in some officers, while others reported "feeling the effects of smoking something illegal." "What will people who come to report incidents think when they enter the police stations and smell such a strong odor?" the union's complaint said. The union said police management has failed to address complaints from officers. The complaint called for specialized containers to be installed at the station to store the marijuana and other objects. *-- Massachusetts police: Officer shot own patrol car, staged crime scene --* MILLIS, Mass. - Police in Massachusetts said an officer is facing prosecution after he allegedly fired his gun at his own police cruiser and burned it to stage a crime scene. Millis Police said they launched a manhunt Tuesday after an officer reported a white man in a dark pickup truck had fired shots at him while he was driving, causing his patrol car to spin around, crash into a tree and catch fire. However, Sgt. William Dwyer said investigators determined the officer's own gun was used to shoot the holes in the police cruiser. "We have determined that the officer's story was fabricated," Dwyer told CNN. "Specifically that he fired shots at his own cruiser as part of a plan to concoct a story that he was fired upon." The officer was identified Friday as Bryan Johnson, a rookie part time officer who was scheduled to begin training soon for a position as a full-time Millis Police officer. "It's hard for me personally. Bryan was a friend, and when this is all over, I wish him the best," Dwyer told the Boston Globe. "But we are not going to allow anyone who violates the public trust or commits a crime to receive special treatment." Dwyer said Johnson was placed on on paid administrative leave pending his official termination. He said police are seeking charges of misleading a police investigation, providing false information to emergency services, malicious destruction of property and unlawful discharge of a firearm. ========================================================= >-->From Our Friend Melinda :) A _,-' `-._ _-'_________`-_ ``---\_ _/---`` (_ - _) \_._/ 8 __H__ 8 \ | / 8 |\ | /| 8 _|_|||_|_8 `-,/ \,-'8. | | `8< | | |-,-| gnv'-'-' >Chinese Doctor's Advise Q: Doctor, I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true? A: Your heart only good for so many beats, and that it... Don't waste on exercise. Everything wear out eventually. Speeding up heart not make you live longer; it like saying you extend life of car by driving faster. Want to live longer? Take nap. Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake? A: No, not at all. Wine made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine, that mean they take water out of fruity bit so you get even more of goodness that way. Beer also made of grain. Bottom up! Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio? A: Well, if you have body and you have fat, your ratio one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio two to one, etc. Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program? A: Can't think of single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No pain...good! Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you? A: YOU NOT LISTENING! Food are fried these day in vegetable oil. In fact, they permeated by it. How could getting more vegetable be bad for you?!? Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle? A: Definitely not! When you exercise muscle, it get bigger. You should only be doing sit-up if you want bigger stomach. Q: Is chocolate bad for me? A: Are you crazy?!? HEL-LO-O!! Cocoa bean! Another vegetable! It best feel-good food around! Q: Is swimming good for your figure? A: If swimming good for your figure, explain whale to me.. Q: Is getting in shape important for my lifestyle? A: Hey! 'Round' is shape! Well... I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets. And remember: Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO-HOO, what a ride!!" AND..... For those of you who watch what you eat, here's the final word on nutrition and health. It's a relief to know the truth after all those conflicting nutritional studies. 1. The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans. 2. The Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans. 3. The Chinese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans. 4. The Italians drink a lot of red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.. 5. The Germans drink a lot of beer and eat lots of sausages and fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans. CONCLUSION: Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently what kills you. --- ...LOL! Thanks Melinda! ========================================================= >-->From CleanLaffs: | | *tock* | | *tock* | <-*) | |(() | |"/ | |' PhS "The Log Song", from Ren & Stimpy (sung to the Slinky commercial tune.) "What rolls down stairs alone or in pairs Rolls over your neighbor's dog? What's great for a snack and fits on your back? It's Log, Log, Log! It's Log, Log, it's big, it's heavy, it's wood. It's Log, Log, it's better than bad, it's good! Everyone wants a log! You're gonna love it, Log! Come on and get your log! Everyone needs a Log!" Of course, it's funnier if you sing it. -<>- My wife had never been to a baseball game, so I took her to see the Los Angeles Dodgers one night. Our seats were right behind the third-base line. At the top of the first inning, the batter hit a foul ball. Miraculously, I managed to catch it on the fly. As I sat down, breathless with excitement, my wife turns to me and says... "That was nice! How many of those do you get a game?" -<>- I came home one night and my wife was crying. I said, "whats wrong?" She said, "I'm home sick." I said, "This is your home." And she said, "Yes, and I'm sick of it!" --Tommy Cooper -<>- Recently launched into the "real world" and shocked by the expenses that came with it, my brother was complaining about the high cost of auto insurance. "If you got married," teased my dad, "the premium would be much lower." My brother smiled and said, "Dad, that would be like buying an airline just to get free peanuts." -<>- As the horror movie was about to reach its terrifying con- clusion, the young woman began fidgeting in her seat next to her date. The man sitting behind her leaned forward and inquired, "Excuse me. Are you feeling hysterical?" "No," she whispered. "He's feeling mine." -<>- The teenager lost a contact lens while playing basketball in his driveway. After a fruitless search, he told his mother the lens was no where to be found. Undaunted, she went outside and in a few minutes returned with the lens in her hand. "How did you manage to find it, Mom?" the teenager asked. "We weren't looking for the same thing," she replied. "You were looking for a small piece of plastic. I was looking for $150." -<>- The young suitor was determined to win the heart of the woman he wanted to marry, in spite of her rejection of his proposal. He began what can only be called a "Campaign" and sent her a token of his affection every day for a month to her house. The plan was successful too -- the young lady fell in love with the UPS man. -<>- On my first day working at the gas station, I watched a senior co-worker measure the level of gasoline in the under- ground tanks by lowering a giant measuring stick down into them. "What would happen if I threw a lit match into the hole?" I joked. "It would go out," he replied very matter-of-factly. "Really?" I asked, surprised to hear that. "Is there a lack of oxygen down there or some safety device that would extinguish it before the fumes ignited?" "No," my co-worker continued. "The force from the explosion would blow out the match." -<>- We were discussing the "don'ts" of public speaking in the PR class I teach. "Don'ts" include a man reaching into his pants pocket and jangling change as he speaks, which is very distracting. To illustrate my point, I asked for a student volunteer, saying, "I need a man with coins in his pocket." What I got instead was a girl yelling out, "Honey, so do I!" ========================================================= >-->From AndyChaps: .--. .--. / ' .\ |'. ( .-. \ \ . ` /\. /`. / ) ( `.' .' '--'` (\ \.' .' ) \`. \ _/ _..--' `. \ /`'<_/ : )"'``..`-3 : :. `"'. ) / |-.'' (_.-._ | / ( .'`--..J ' |-'( |_| | : >` '. .'' : | Y | < | : > ' \ `_ : '` \ / :- ' || : / ./: | \ .'J /_ ) : | '% | a:f /.-.`). : I | / ( \ ) : .^) `-' `..-' (`"' / ===' ** It only takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them, and in your entire lifetime, you will never forget them! Now... says Andy... That's real friendship! ** Keep your eyes on Jesus* "Let nothing disturb you, nothing frighten you, all things are passing, God is unchanging. Patience gains all; nothing is lacking to those who have God: God alone is sufficient." (St. Teresa of Avila) ** "The harsh and violent pain of the trial disappears, it seems almost to dissolve in the presence of prayer and contemplation. It is precisely this attitude of trusting abandonment that elicits divine intervention." (Pope John Paul II) ** Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it. Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing. --Helen Keller -<>- ** Andy Says... Just Think About This! ** ___ ____ ___ ____( \ .-' `-. / )____ (____ \_____ / (O O) \ _____/ ____) (____ `-----( ) )-----' ____) (____ _____________\ .____. /_____________ ____) (______/ Joe Reiss `-.____.-' \______) ** Our God IS an AWESOME God! HE IS! ** This is almost overwhelming when you think about it. Except He Is ... GOD Moses and the people were in the desert, but what was he going to do with them? They had to be fed, and feeding 2 or 3 million people requires a lot of food According to the Quartermaster General in the Army, it is reported that Moses would have to have had 1500 tons of food each day. Do you know that to bring that much food each day, two freight trains, each at least a mile long, would be required! Besides you must remember, they were out in the desert, so they would have to have firewood to use in cooking the food. This would take 4000 tons of wood and a few more freight trains, each a mile long, just for one day. And just think, they were forty years in transit. And Oh yes! They would have to have water. If they only had enough to drink and wash a few dishes, it would take 11,000,000 gallons each day and a freight train with tank cars, 1800 miles long, just to bring water! And then another thing! They had to get across the Red Sea at night. Now, if they went on a narrow path, double file, the line would be 800 miles long and would require 35 days and nights to get through. So there had to be a space in the Red Sea, 3 miles wide so that they could walk 5000 abreast to get over in one night. But then, there is another problem...............each time they camped at the end of the day, a campground two-thirds the size of the state of Rhode Island was required, or a total of 750 square miles long..... think of it! This much space for camping. Do you think Moses figured all this out before he left Egypt? I think not! You see, Moses believed in God. God took care of these things for him. Now do you think God has any problem taking care of all your needs? Asked the Lord to bless you As You pray today. To guide you and protect you as you go along your way.......... His love is always with you, His promises are true, And when we give Him all our cares, You know He will see us through. Our God is an Awesome God!! So when the road you're traveling on seems difficult at best, just remember .... pray and God will do the rest. On That you CAN depend! -<>- ** Blonde One Line Jokes ** _ _ / _ (o\-~-/o) _ (o\ ( 9 9 ) /o) \ \( (Y) )/ / \ ) ( / / \ _____/ )_( \____ hjw =_==( (===) )=_= `97 | \ ) ( / | \|vVv(__/,v#\__)V/|/|#.. ~~~(It may be your turn in the barrel next! Andy) 1.Why does it take longer to build a blonde snowman as opposed to a regular one? (You have to hollow out the head.) 2.Why won't they hire blondes as pharmacists? (They keep breaking the prescription bottles in the typewriters.) 3.Hear about the blonde that got an AM radio? (It took her a month to realize she could play it in the afternoon.) 4.What happened to the blonde ice hockey team? (They drowned during Spring Training.) 5.Why did the blonde scale the chain-link fence? (To see what was on the other side.) 6.How did the blonde die drinking milk? (The cow stepped on her.) 7.How did the blonde burn her nose? Bobbing for French fries.) 8.Why do blondes have more fun? (They're easier to amuse.) 9.What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer? (Frosted flakes.) 10.Why can't blondes put in light bulbs? (They keep breaking them with their hammers.) 11.Did you hear about the blonde that shot an arrow into the air? (She missed.) 12.What is it when a blonde blows into another blonde's ear? (Data transfer.) 13.Why did the blonde resolve to have only three children? (Because she read that one child out of every four born was Chinese.) 14.Why did the blonde put make-up on her forehead? (She wanted everyone to know that she was able to make up her mind.) 15.Why did the blonde ask her friends to save their burned-out light bulbs? (She needed them for the darkroom she was building.) 16.Why are Asians so smart? (No blondes.) 17.What is the biggest advantage to marrying a blonde? (You get to park in the Handicapped Zone) -<>- _____ .---...-. ,' -. `. ,' _____...' / - _ - \ : .' _ _ \\ : ' _)' : | :-(_).(_):: (_ ;) | | -' || \ _ / ; | _ || `..___..' `-'..____.'`' ;._: _; :_ / \ SSt ,' `' `. SSt ** KIDS IN THE FIFTIES ** Were you a kid in the Fifties or so? Everybody makes fun of our childhood! Comedians joke. Grandkids snicker. Twenty-something's shudder and say "Eeeew!" But was our childhood really all that bad? Judge for yourself: * In 1953 The US population was less than 150 million... Yet you knew more people then, and knew them better... And that was good. * The average annual salary was under $3,000... Yet our parents could put some of it away for a rainy day and still live a decent life... And that was good. * A loaf of bread cost about 15 cents... But it was safe for a five-year-old to skate to the store and buy one... And that was good. * Prime-Time meant I Love Lucy, Ozzie and Harriet, Gunsmoke and Lassie... So nobody ever heard of ratings or filters... And that was good. * We didn't have air-conditioning... So the windows stayed up and half a dozen mothers ran outside when you fell off your bike... And that was good. * Your teacher was either Miss Matthews or Mrs. Logan or Mr. Adkins... But not Ms Becky or Mr.Dan... And that was good. * The only hazardous material you knew about... Was a patch of sandburrs around the light pole at the corner... And that was good. * You loved to climb into a fresh bed... Because sheets were dried on the clothesline... And that was good. * People generally lived in the same hometown with their relatives... So "child care" meant grandparents or aunts and uncles... And that was good. * Parents were respected and their rules were law.... Children did not talk back.... and that was good. * TV was in black-and-white... But all outdoors was in glorious color....And that was certainly good. [only cartoons were on Saturday] * Your Dad knew how to adjust everybody's carburetor... And the Dad next door knew how to adjust all the TV knobs... And that was very good. * Your grandma grew snap beans in the back yard... And chickens behind the garage... And that was definitely good. * And just when you were about to do something really bad... Chances were you'd run into your Dad's high school coach... Or the nosy old lady from up the street... Or your little sister's piano teacher... Or somebody from Church... ALL of whom knew your parents' phone number... And YOUR first name... And even THAT was good! ~~~Andy Says... This is the truth as I am a product of that era~~~ -<>- ____, "||||.W.|| // "| ||||^T^|| || /^^\\ \\/^\\ /^^\\ //^^|| /^^\\ || ,-'|| || || ,-'|||| || ,-'|| \\___/\\_/\;_||_ _||_\\_/\;\\__/|,\\_/\; m1a ** HOW TO IDENTIFY WHERE A CANADIAN DRIVER IS FROM ** * One hand on wheel, one hand out window: TORONTO * One hand on wheel, one hand on horn: MONTREAL * One hand on wheel, one hand out window, cutting across all lanes of traffic: OTTAWA * One hand on wheel, one hand on newspaper, cradling cell phone, balancing Tim Horton's coffee on knee, foot solidly on accelerator: CALGARY * Both hands on wheel, eyes shut, both feet on brake, quivering in terror: SASKATOON, but driving in TORONTO * Both hands in air, gesturing, both feet on accelerator, head turned to talk to someone in the back seat: QUEBEC CITY * One hand on 12 oz. double shot latte, one knee on wheel, cradling cellphone, foot on brake, mind on radio game, banging head on steering wheel while stuck in traffic: VANCOUVER * One hand on wheel, one hand on hunting rifle, alternating between both feet being on the brake and both feet on the accelerator throwing McDonald's bag out the window: RED DEER * Four wheel drive pick-up truck, shotgun mounted in rear window, raccoon tails attached to the antenna: MOOSE JAW * Two hands gripping wheel, blue hair barely visible above windshield driving 40 km/hr on Hwy 1 in the left lane with the left blinker on: VICTORIA * One ski-doo mitt on steering wheel, one ski-doo mittscraper in hand out front window scraping frost, Guess Who on DVD playing Share The Land, hockey equipment smelling up car interior, waiting at lights for snow removal equipment to finish clearing intersection: EDMONTON -<>- ,-`'-. / , \ ( ((_))) ) / a a / C > ( \ =( / ) ( ) ( .--'. ;-. ) ' `'' ` / | , .--\|-(| ( | |' ` `( | | ) ) `.| | .' | | || ( () || \ \ \| \ \ ` / \ \ \ ' \ \ ` / | )> \ ** Dial "L" for Loser ** According to the U.K. Sunday People, thousands of English men are getting the brush off when women they're interested in hand them their phone number, which turns out to be a recording that, when called tells the hapless Romeo: "The person you are calling was obviously not interested. For advice on personal hygiene, improving your dress sense or better ways of approaching females, please hold." After a short pause, the message continues: "I'm sorry, all our operators are busy washing their hair." -<>- ~ TRIVIA: Kuantan, Malaysia (Ananova): Malaysian firefighters had to carry a woman to an ambulance after she got her foot stuck in a toilet's sewage pipe. They smashed the bowl, but couldn't remove the pipe so they sawed it and the 65-year-old went to hospital with part of it still attached. Ee Yeng Moi from Kuantan had been standing on the toilet cleaning when she slipped and got her foot stuck. Doctors managed to free Ee's leg and she was treated for cuts and bruises, the New Straits Times reports. District fire chief Mohamad Osman said: "Our men could not pull her foot out. We then broke the toilet bowl and found that her foot was stuck firmly in the connecting pipe." He said his men had even tried applying coconut oil to help lubricate the foot but it didn't work. -<>- ** THE SULTAN AND HIS SON ** Some years ago, a sultan was becoming angry as he had six children, all girls, and therefore had no son and heir. Imagine his joy when one of his wives finally presented him with his only son and heir. Just before his son's sixth birthday, the Sultan took him to one side and said, "Son, I am very proud of you. Anything you want, I shall get for you." His son replied, "Daddy, I would like to have my own airplane." Not wanting to do anything halfway, his father bought him American Airlines. Just before his son's seventh birthday, the Sultan took him to one side. "Son, you are my pride and joy. Anything you want, I shall get for you." His son replied, "Daddy, I would like a boat." Not wanting to do anything halfway, his father bought him The Princess Cruise Lines. Just before his son's eighth birthday, the Sultan took him to one side. "Son, you bring so much happiness into my life. Anything you want, I shall get for you." His son replied, "Daddy, I would like to be able to watch cartoons." ,n888888n, .8888888888b 888888888888nd8P~''8g, 88888888888888 _ `'~\. .n. `Y888888888888. / _ |~\\ (8"8b ,nnn.. 8888888b. | \ \m\|8888P ,d8888888888888888b. \8b|.\P~ ~P8~ 888888888888888P~~_~ `8B_| | ~888888888~'8' d8. ~ _/ ~Y8888P' ~\ | |~|~b,__ __--~ --~~\ ,d8888888b.\`\_/ __/~ \_ d88888888888b\_-~8888888bn. \8888P "Y888888888888"888888bn. /~'\_"__) "d88888888P,-~~-~888 / / ) ~\ ,888888/~' / / / 8' ( / / / |) ) / '"88(/ ~ / / | ( /_/ /~ \( _/ / (_(_ ( /~~\/ , O,/~\___/_/' ~~~ | \_ ( )( \_| -- by Gordon M"uller __--~"mb ,g8888b. _/ 8888b(.8P"~'~---__ / ~~~| / ,/~~~~--, `\ ( ~\,_) (/ ~-_`\ \ -__---~._ \ ~\\ ( )\\ )) `\ ) "-_ `| \__ __/ ~-__ __--~ ~~"~ ~~~ Not wanting to do anything halfway, his father bought him Disney Studios and their theaters, where he watched all his favorite cartoons. Just before his son's ninth birthday, the Sultan took him to one side. "Son, you are an inspiration to us all. Anything you want, I shall get for you." His son, who had really gotten into the Disney cartoons, replied, "Daddy, I would like a Mickey Mouse outfit." Taking what his son said literally, the father bought him AOL!! ========================================================= >-->FUN Places To Net Visit :) Noah's Ark! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/noahsark2.html Autumn World! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/autumn.html Amazing Photos 2! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/amazingphotos2.html Amazing Photos 3! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/amazingphotos3.html Animals In Fall! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/animalsinfall.html Thoughts Into Action 6! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/action6.html Cockatoo Story! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/cockatoos.html Extreme Pumpkins 2! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/pumpkin2.html Bucket List! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/bucketlist.html Venice Of Holland! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/gvillage.html Attitude Is Everything 3! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/attitude3.html Sweet Wooden Car! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/woodcar.html Life's Little Oops 8! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/whoops8.html -<>- >Visit me at StumbleUpon: http://tinyurl.com/pen8f6m -<>- >From Our Friend PatDeE :) Ravel wrote it for the world but it took the blokes from "Down Under" to make it such a joy to listen to. Music is so good for the soul.....adults and children can really carry the "beat"! This was made in Brisbane on the South Bank of the Brisbane River where the Cultural Centre is. Suggest full screen and speakers on to enjoy this wonderful rendition. https://www.youtube.com/embed/xn7CYzPMf2o --- ...Sweet! Thanks PatDeE! -<>- >From Our Friend Linda :) This is one of the most beautiful and meaningful streaming videos ever created. Be sure your speakers are on. http://www.andiesisle.com/creation/magnificent.html --- ...Quite Nice! Thanks Linda! -<>- >From Our Friend Melinda :) I’ve received many remarkable nature photographs over the years but this photo of a nesting Falcon is perhaps the most remarkable Nature shot that I’ve ever seen. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did . . . nature is truly breath-taking! I've sent this to most of my older friends. The younger ones probably have never seen a falcon and wouldn't recognize it. http://i.imgur.com/YW6Fufm.jpg Trunk Monkey videos http://www.suburbanautogroup.com/trunk-monkey-videos/ --- ...Love these! Thanks Melinda! -<>- >From Our Friend Melody :) Ping Pong 3D http://flash.pcastuces.com/jouer.asp?Id=26 The Tattletale http://www.sermonillustrator.org/illustrator/sermon3b/tattletale.htm Old school talent. [VIDEO] http://www.wimp.com/oldschool/ 6 Ways To Pack A Better Lunch - YouTube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OJP6fPcyQf0 --- ...Good ones! Thanks Melody! -<>- >From Our Friend Geniann :) A Typical Ride on a New York Subway… https://www.youtube.com/embed/47e3vjA_4uc?feature=player_embedded --- ...What a riot! Thanks Geniann! All Gods creatures got a place in the Choir https://www.youtube.com/embed/-iP27eatYxE --- ...YeeeeHaaa! Great fun! Thanks Geniann! Love this one too... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VBW4bZTRE4M&feature=youtu.be -<>- >From Our Friend LouiseA :) Everyone knows that magic tricks are brilliant illusions that use sleight of hand, engineering, psychology and more to amaze and astound us. But every once in awhile, you see a trick that really makes you believe in magic. Check out the card trick that made crotchety judge Simon Cowell believe. https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=f0m9QtYWTIE When Jamie Raven walked up on stage, the judges seemed skeptical, but once he started showing them his magic tricks, they couldn't believe their eyes. https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=f0m9QtYWTIE --- ...Awesome! Thanks LouiseA! ======================================================= >-->Quotes & Thunkers: [from 2006!] "A recent study has found that some girls start to learn cruelty and manipulation as young as three years old – or as Martha Stewart calls them - 'late bloomers'." --Conan O'Brien "This week, the State Board of Education in Kansas is continuing its hearings on how evolution should be taught in public schools...In other news, besides the evolution debate in Kansas, eight players from the Chicago White Sox were accused of throwing the World Series, flappers everywhere are getting their knickers off by sitting on flagpoles, and the stock market crashed. And that's this week's installment of 'Things I Thought Already Happened in the 1920s.'" --Dennis Miller "The International Air Guitar Championships are going on in Finland. I hear the winner gets an imaginary check of $1 million." --Jay Leno "The L.A.P.D. says they are not going to release Paris Hilton's arrest report and mug shot. They also said it was too late to stop the release of her album." --Conan O'Brien "Doctors and hospitals have gone back to literally the Middle Ages for a cure they say works better than anything they have in modern medicine for post-operative blood coagulation. They are going back to flesh-eating maggots and blood-sucking leeches. Or as most people know them, HMOs." --Bill Maher "A mild earthquake shook Mexico City. Fortunately no citizens of Mexico City were hurt because they're all living in Los Angeles." --Conan O'Brien "Oh, sure, you can have snakes on a plane, but shampoo and toothpaste...forget it." --David Letterman "David Hasselhoff was arrested for driving under the influence. Cops thought Hasselhoff could be under the influence when they noticed his talking car was slurring its words." --Conan O'Brien "The Emmy Awards were last night. It was a very tough night for me. I will admit I got a little carried away with the acceptance speech and started going on and on. But they didn't have to kick me out of Hooters." --Dave Letterman "Now they're saying all this terrorist activity could lead to higher oil prices. When asked why, the oil companies said, 'Cause everything leads to higher oil prices.' In fact, the price of crude oil could hit $80 a barrel. That's not crude -- that's obscene." --Jay Leno >Updated FUN STUFF URLS - Oh Yeah :) Shangy! ------------------------------------------------------------------------ http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/urls.html FUN URLS ------------------------------------------------------------------------ -->FULL LENGTH - FREE On line AUDIO MP3 Christian Foundational Class http://www.truthortradition.com/modules.php?name=News&file=article&sid=61 NEW LIFE IN CHRIST! ------------------------------------------------------------------------ -->This is for all you who love food and DARE to make it at home Yep. You guessed it - Recipes. These are Tried and True, Yummy to the Tummy, good old fashioned home cooking recipes that are EASY to do :) Visit Shangy's Easy-Does-It Home Recipes: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/easy.html Home Recipes >Got A good Recipe? SHARE IT HERE: Share A Recipe ************************************************************************ >TO SUBSCRIBE: Visit Here This Weeks regular Shangy emails OR For the Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com ************************************************************************