Go Fishing Day, Lost Dog And More... :) Shangy! >Here are the details on our Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com To UnSubscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com Group home page: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ShangyFunList or Web Site: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/ShangyFunList.html Group email address: ShangyFunList@yahoogroups.com or email me here: bcrsystems@earthlink.net ================ *~* Please Consider Giving To ShangralaFamilyFun.com The cost of the website has gone up dramatically due to the ever increasingly wonderful pages and photos being added each week to entertain you and our fellow Christian families. While the ads on the website do help, I don't want to drag the site down with tons of them to pay for it. I need your help! "We are each of us angels with but one wing, and can only fly by embracing each other" -Luciano Decrescenzo ~ CALLING ALL CARING ANGELS ~ ,-. / `. ,--_. \ \ \ `-_ `. \ ^-_ `. `. \ `. `. `. \ `. `. \ \ `. `-___/ | `. '--. \ ,--.--.' \ |* |* | \ `--' --. | --'\ | .~T--____/ / `~|_/\_/ ,' | ,' .--.| ,' ,- | | / ,' | | FRM *~* WE NEED CARING And SHARING Angels *~* >Do You Want To Be A Shangrala Angel? If you'd like to help and be counted as a Shangrala Angel, the easiest way to do that is through online giving. It is easy to use, and most of all, it is secure. Please visit the site, scroll down and click on the donate button. A Secure PAYPAL form page comes up. NOTE: Paypal will generate a 'Quantity 1' and 'Price per item' form. Just ignore the price per item and put whatever it is you desire to give in there. With Paypal, you will have your normal receipt for your 'payment' donation in USD (United States Dollars). You can put a memo in there if you'd like. EVERY LITTLE BIT WILL HELP! Any amount is greatly appreciated and needed! PLEASE Visit Shangrala to Help: http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/index.html OR If you'd rather send us a donation, Please MAIL it here: Elrhea Bigham 502 S. Harrison Van Wert, OH 45891 *~* THANK YOU! MAY GOD BLESS YOU MOST ABUNDANTLY FOR YOUR GIFT! ================ *~* A REMINDER: PLEASE Send me sweet, interesting, funny, inspiring, family type forwards ANY TIME here... bcrsystems@earthlink.net I Need them, Love them, Use them, and Share them! THANK YOU!! AND For Facebook Users: Please Friend Me / Like Me here... http://tinyurl.com/cma6all AND For Google Plus Users: You can find me here... Shangy Bigham https://plus.google.com/106648555948034085752/posts AND Please Share This email with All Your Friends And Family! ^~^ May God SUPER BLESS You As You Do! THANK YOU! :) -<>- * NOTE: An easy way to adjust the size of print in email or any page is to hold down the Ctrl tab while moving the scroll button on the mouse. You can also use the keyboard to change the font size in your web browser or emails. Hold down the Ctrl key while pressing the + key for larger text or the - key for smaller text! ======================================================= >-->From SmileZilla: /| |\ `__\\ //__' || || \__`\ |'__/ `_\\ //_' _.,:---;,._ \_: :_/ |@. .@| | | ,\.-./ \ ;;`-' `---__________-----.-. ;;; \_\ ';;; | ; | ; \ \ \ | / \_, \ / \ |\ |';| |,,,,,,,,/ \ \ \_ | | | \ / | \ \ | | / \ | | || | | | | | | || | | | | | | || | | | | | |_||_| |_| |_| /_//_/ /_/ /_/ valkyrie Because John was processing his first accident report at the transport company where he worked, he was being particularly attentive. The driver had hit a deer on the highway, and the result was a severely damaged hood and fender. John's serious mood was broken, however, when he reached the section of the report that asked, "Speed of other vehicle?" The driver had put, "Full gallop." -<>- The mother of three notoriously unruly youngsters was asked whether or not she'd have children if she had to do over again. "Sure," she replied, "but not the same ones." ======================================================= +------------ BIZARRE HOLIDAYS ------------+ June 18 is Go Fishing Day, International Panic Day, International Picnic Day, International Sushi Day and National Splurge Day June 19 is Juneteenth, National Kissing Day and World Sauntering Day June 20 is Ice Cream Soda Day and National Bald Eagle Day June 21 is Go Skate Day, International Yoga Day, National Selfie Day and Finally Summer Day / Summer Solstice - date varies June 22 is National Chocolate Eclair Day and Take Your Dog to Work Day June 23 is National Columnists Day and National Pink Day June 24 is Swim a Lap Day ======================================================= >-->From GoodCleanFun: \\ ///// | | (| _ _ |) |` | '| | __ | >>>___/\_^__/\___<<< / ||| \ Mike Hertz >Geology Degree My parents scoffed, but I knew my college degree in geology would come in handy one day. It was during Army Basic Training in Texas and I was pulling KP duty. When the sergeant asked me what I did in civilian life, I proudly said that I was a geologist. "Good. I'm looking for someone with your background," he said, while dropping a bulging sack onto the table. "You've got just the right qualifications to pick the rocks out of these potatoes before you peel them." -<>- >Feed the Baby I was explaining to our nine-year-old son some of the things he could do to help so he wouldn't feel left out of the activities involving our newly arrived baby daughter. I finished by telling him that when his sister was older, he could even feed her. "Oh, Mom," he replied in a plaintive voice, "I can't even remember to feed the dog!" -<>- >Ginzu Knives I bought a set of Ginzu knives for only three easy payments of $29.95 and they came with a lifetime guarantee. When the handles fell off, I returned the knives with my lifetime guarantee asking for a refund. They wrote back saying, "The guarantee was for the lifetime of the knives. Obviously, the knives are dead, so the guarantee is no longer valid." -<>- >Puberty My nine-year-old grandson, recently asked his mother about puberty. She explained that it occurs when children's bodies begin to change. "Boys," she said, "grow taller and develop muscles. Their voices deepen, and they start to grow hair, like facial hair." She paused. "Do you understand?" "Yes", he replied. "I just hope it happens on a Saturday, when I'm not in school." -<>- _.--"""--._ .' '-. `. __/__ (-. `\ \ /o `o \ \ \ \ _\__.__/ )) | | ; .--;" | | \ ( `) | | \ _|`---' .' _, _| | `\ '`_\ \ '_,.-';_.-`\| \ \_ .' '--'---;` / / |\ |_..--' \ \'-'.' .--'.__/ __.-; `"` (___...---''` \ _/_ \ /jgs\ \___/ >Lost Dog An old farmer is inconsolable after his dog goes missing. His wife suggests he take out an ad in the newspaper, which he does. But two weeks later, there's still no sign of the pooch. "What did you write in the ad?" his wife asks. "'Here, boy,'" he replies. ========================================================= ,%&& %&& % ,%&%& %&%& %& %& %&% &%&% % &% % &%% %&% &% %&%&, &%&% %&%& %& &%& % %%& %&%& %&%&% %&%%& &%&% %&% % %& &% %%& && %&% %&%& %&% %&%' '%&% %&% %&&%&%%'% % %& %& %&% &%% `\%%.' /`%&' | | /`-._ _\\/ |, |_ / `-._ ..--~`_ |; |_`\_ / ,\\.~` `-._ - ^ |;: |/^}__..-,@ .~` ~ `o ~ |;: |(____.-' '. ~ - ` ~ |;: | \ / `\ //. - ^ ~ |;: |\ /' /\_\_ ~. _ ~ - //- jgs\\/;: \'--' `---` `\\//-\\/// >-->Happy Go Fishing Day! Max: What kind of music should you listen to while fishing? Nick: Beats me. Max: Something catchy! Matt: What do you get when you cross a fishing lure with a gym sock? Rick: I don’t know. What? Matt: A hook, line and stinker! Daffynition: Fishing - dock—A surgeon on vacation. Little Eddy and his mom were digging for fishing bait in the garden. Uncovering a many-legged creature, Eddy proudly dangled it before his mom. “No, honey, it won’t do for bait,” she said. “It’s not an earthworm.” “It’s not?” Eddy asked, his eyes wide. “What planet is it from?” Superboy: Why did Batman and Robin quit going fishing together? Superman: Why? Superboy: Because Robin kept eating all the worms! ,-. O / `. <\/ `. |* `. / \ `. / / `>')3s, --------. ,' apc / 7 Game warden: Didn’t you see the no-fishing sign, son? Boy: I’m not fishing, sir. I’m teaching these worms how to swim! Tom Swiftie: “Pass me the shellfish,” Tom said crabbily. A book never written: “How to Fish” by Will Ketchum. Ben: Where do goldfish go on vacation? Bob: Where? Ben: Around the globe! Aaron: How do fish get from place to place while playing golf? Pee Wee: I don’t know. How? Aaron: By golf carp! _H_ /___\ \888/ ~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~U~^~^~^~^~^~^~^ ~ | ~ o | ~ ___ o | _,.--,.'` `~'-.._ O | /_ .-" _ /_\'. | ~ .-';' (( ` \0/ `\ # /__; ((_ ,_ | , # .-; \_ / # _#, / ; .-' / _.--""-.\`~` `#(('\\ ~ ;-'; / / .' )) \\ ; /.--'.' (( )) \ | ~ \\ (( \ | )) ` ~ \ | ` \ | jgs .` `""-. .' \ ~ ~ | |\ | \ / '-._| \.' Jaylun: Why do fish swim in schools? Ray: I don’t know. Jaylun: Because they can’t walk! Allen: Why is it so easy to weigh fish? Neal: I don’t know. Why? Allen: Because they have their own scales! Mark: Where do fish keep their money? Kevin: Where? Mark: In a riverbank. ,///////. ./ -._ __,---//////////, ./// `-._ ,-' ) ) ) ) ) )''////_ ///// `-._ /) _,-' ))`. ) ) ) ) ) ) ) ) )`-.////// `-. ,-=([= / ()_)))))\ ) ) ) ) ) ) ) ) )//////// O/ \) \____ )))))) ) ) ) ) ) ) ) ) \\\\\\\\ \ _ Krogg `````.)))/ ) ) ) ) ) ) ) ),-`\\\\\\\ \ ) ___,')),') ) ) ) )_),,--' \\\\\\ \=(o)####HHF" (_______.\\)_),--'" `\\\\ -\\\ `\\\ \\\ `\ Thomas: How do you communicate with a fish? Russ: I don’t know. Thomas: Drop it a line! Diner: Waiter, waiter, what’s wrong with this fish? Waiter: Long time no sea, sir. ,......, | Clyde W. Watson | FF@ | | ,'======', | /----------\ | :;:(_/\_):;: | `:;\/""\/;:' | \\\/// | .--,____,''.____.--, | : | __ \ / __ | ; | | ||__| || |__|| | ,LL | :_____||_____: |/._; \ ;_____||_____; ./||Q \.. ||||[]|||| \./ [| || |] [: __ :] | || | ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ,_(\_(\\\___ | || | ___///)__/)_. (\/,:;:;:;:(( o`\ \___/\___/ /'o )):;:;:;:;.\/) (/\.______,,\\__( .| | | |. (___//.._______./\) (/ (/ (__)) ((__) \) \) Hey Vern, Let's tie his shoe laces together! From: https://fishing.boyslife.org/25-funny-fish-jokes/ ========================================================= >-->From Our Friend LouiseAu :) o o \__/,'`.,'`._, /,-. \ / <_, > - )/ / <_, \__,/ / ,' _/_(_/______/__ ( (_ ,,--'---^,\\ ___/ \ / ___,' /,---' \\ \_ `. ` / `. \ | \_ \ |/\/\/\| `. \ \ | /\ `.`. \( /\ \ `.`. | \ `.`._, `-\_, | /| `-' |/\( |(_\\_ | / \ ( /_/gnv\_\ >SMILES A couple had been married for 25 years and were celebrating their 60th birthdays, which fell on the same day. During the celebration a fairy appeared and said that because they had been such a loving couple for all 25 years, she would give them one wish each. The wife wanted to travel around the world. The fairy waved her hand, and Boom! She had the tickets in her hand. Next, it was the husband's turn. He paused for a moment, then said shyly, "Well, I'd like to have a wife 30 years younger than me." The fairy picked up her wand, and Boom! He was ninety. ---------- Two women, passing through the fragrance department of a big department store, were offered samples of new perfumes. One woman commented that her sample was much too strong. The clerk replied, "Oh, it'll be much softer once the alcohol wears off." "See!" chided her friend. "I told you not to have that second drink!" ---------- The two ladies were sitting in the living room, waiting for their hostess, who was slightly delayed. The daughter of the family was with them, on the theory that she would keep the visitors occupied during the wait. The child was about six years old, snub nosed, freckled, buck toothed and bespectacled. She maintained a deep silence and the two ladies peered doubtfully at her. Finally, one of them muttered to the other, "Not very p-r-e-t-t-y, I fear," carefully spelling the key word. Whereupon the child piped up, "But awfully s-m-a-r-t!" ---------- Little Johnny's new baby brother was screaming up a storm. He asked his mom, “Where'd we get him?” His mother replied, “He came from heaven, Johnny.” Johnny says, “WOW! I can see why they threw him out!” --------- When we moved cross-country, my wife and I decided to drive both our cars. Hank, our eight-year-old, worried asked, "How will we keep from getting separated?" "We'll drive slow so one car can follow the other," I reassured him. "Yeah, but what if we get separated?" he persisted. "Then I guess we'll never see each other again," I quipped. "Okay," he said, "I'm riding with Mom. ---------- A little boy in a store had been pawing over a stock of greeting cards for some time when a clerk asked, "Just what is it you're looking for? A birthday greeting, message to a sick friend, anniversary or a congratulations to your mom and dad?" The boy shook his head and answered, "Got any like a blank report card?" ---------- "So tell me, Mrs. Smith," asked the interviewer, "have you any other skills you think might be worth mentioning?" "Actually, yes," said the applicant modestly. "Last year I had two short stories published in national magazines, and I finished my novel." "Very impressive," he commented, "but I was thinking of skills you could apply during office hours." Mrs. Smith explained brightly, "Oh, that was during office hours." ---------- Our neighbor used the word hypochondriac to describe the phase her teen-age daughter was going though. One day the girl was convinced that the pain on her left side was appendicitis. Her mother explained that the appendix is on the right. "So that's why it hurts to much," her daughter said. "My appendix is on the wrong side." ---------- Several days ago as I left a meeting at our church, I desperately gave myself a personal TSA pat down. I was looking for my keys. They were not in my pockets. A quick search in the meeting room revealed nothing. Suddenly I realized, I must have left them in the car. Frantically, I headed for the parking lot. My wife, Diane, has scolded me many times for leaving the keys in the ignition. My theory is the ignition is the best place not to lose them. Her theory is that the car will be stolen. As I burst through the doors of the church, I came to a terrifying conclusion. Her theory was right. The parking lot was empty. I immediately call the police. I gave them my location, confessed that I had left my keys in the car, and that it had been stolen. Then I made the most difficult call of all, "Honey," I stammered. I always call her "honey" in times like these. "I left my keys in the car, and it has been stolen." There was a period of silence. I thought the call had been dropped, but then I heard Diane's voice. "Ken" she barked, "I dropped you off!" Now it was my time to be silent. Embarrassed, I said, "Well, come and get me." Diane retorted, "I will, as soon as I can convince this policeman that I did not steal your car!!!" ---------- ./'. .'\. './ '. .' \.' _.--~~'--.._ './ '. .' \.' _..--'~~--._ .' ~~-._ './.'..'.\.' _.~~ `. .' ,;:::::;, ~-._ .--. _.~ ,;:::::;, `. '`. ,;.-' `-.:; \|~-._.-::::-._.-~;|/ ,;.-' `-.;, `. ' `. ;/ .--. \;' ' (::::::::) ` ,;/ .--. \:; .' `. ' ,;'`. ,;\ `--' /;, //; :::::::: ;\\ ;;\ `--' /;' .' `:, ' `._,;`-. ,;`-.__.-':;' \\; :::::: ;// ,;`-.__.-':;. '`;,_.' `.,;'`. `;::::' )/" :::::: '\( `;:::::;'.'`;.' `.,;'`. .::::. .'`;.' `.,;'`. .'::::::. .-'`;.' `.,;'`-. .' :::::: `. .-'`;..' `-._,;`--.___ .' :::::: `. _.-'`;_.-' `-.____.-' `::::' `-.'___.-' .'.;;::::;, \.::./ .;;::::;,`. .',::.-""-.::. \ / ,::.-""-.::.`. / ;:: (_) :;; \/ .:: (_) ::; \ / ;:`-.__.-';; \ ;:`-.__.-';; \ `.`. `::::::::' .' ;::::::::' .'.' `.`._ .'. _.'.' jro `-.;-._______.-' `-._________.-;.-' A woman was having a passionate affair with an inspector from a pest-control company. One afternoon they were carrying on in the bedroom together when her husband arrived home unexpectedly. "Quick," said the woman to her lover," into the closet!", and she pushed him in the closet, stark naked. The husband, however, became suspicious and after a search of the bedroom discovered the man in the closet. "Who are you?" he asked him. "I'm an inspector from Bugs-B-Gone," said the exterminator. "What are you doing in there?" the husband asked. "I'm investigating a complaint about an infestation of moths," the man replied. "And where are your clothes?" asked the husband. The man looked down at himself and said,... "Why, Those little pests!" ---------- My wife and I went to a "Dude Ranch" in Texas. The cowboy preparing the horses asked if she wanted a Western or English saddle, and she asked what the difference was. He told her one had a horn and one didn't, she replied, "The one without the horn is fine. I don't expect we'll run into too much traffic." ---------- A businessman on his deathbed called his friend and said, "Bill, I want you to promise me that when I die you will have my remains cremated." "And what," his friend asked, "do you want me to do with your ashes?" The businessman said, "Just put them in an envelope and mail them to the Inland Revenue and write on the envelope, "Now you have everything.'" ---------- Now that they are retired, my mother and father are discussing all the aspects of their future. "What will you do if I die before you do?" Dad asked Mom. After some thought, she said that she'd probably look for a house- sharing situation with three other single or widowed women who might be a little younger than herself, since she is so active for her age. Then Mom asked Dad, "What will you do if I die first?" He replied, "Heck, probably the same thing." ---------- A man on his deathbed requested that his wife gather up all his money and place it in the attic. He would pick it up on his way out of this life. Being the faithful, loving wife she had been for over 50 years, she did as she was told. Soon the man died. Weeks later, she remembered his request and went to the attic to see if he had followed through. There in the same place where she had left it, was the money. "I knew it," she exclaimed, "I should have put it in the basement. ---------- Most of us have a bad habit we are constantly trying to break. For me, it's biting my fingernails. One day I told my husband about my latest solution: press-on nails. "Great Idea, Honey," he smiled. "You can eat them straight out of the box." --- ...HaHa! Good ones Thanks LouiseAu! ========================================================= >-->From ArcamaxJokes: _________________________ || || || || || ||, , ,|| || || (||/|/(\||/ || || ||| _'_`||| || || || o o || || || (|| - `||) || || || = || || ScS || ||\___/|| || ||___||) , (||___|| /||---||-\_/-||---||\ / ||--_||_____||_--|| \ (_(||)-| S123-45 |-(||)_) |"""""""""""""""""""""""""""| The State of Vermont is trying to get people to move into their state, and to sweeten the deal they’re now offering each new resident up to $10,000. This is great, because until now the most popular way to become a Vermont resident was through the witness protection program. -<>- ..----..__ /_______/ ~~----~~/| /' /' /--- /'~~' /'/| /..----./__ /~~~~~/| || | .----._ ~~----~~|/' |/| | | | |~~----. |/| | | | | | | | |/' | | | |.----.| | | | /'/| | | | |~~----| |/' | | | | | | | | |/|/' | |.----.| | | | '/' |_..----..__~~----' |/' Ts97 ~~----~~' Microsoft is working on technology that removes the need for cashiers and checkout lines. This cutting-edge technology is known as shoplifting. -<>- Teacher: If you multiplied 50 by 8 and then divided by 4, what would you get? Student: The wrong answer. -<>- "Pardon me, lady", said the man trying to get back to his seat in the darkened movie theater, "but did I step on your toes a few minutes ago?" "You certainly did!!", said the woman in the aisle seat. "Good, then I'm in the right row!" the man said as he went back to his seat. -<>- /T /I / |/ | .-~/ T\ Y I |/ / _ /T | \I | I Y.-~/ I l /I T\ | | l | T / T\ | \ Y l /T | \I l \ ` l Y __ | \l \l \I l __l l \ ` _. | \ ~-l `\ `\ \ \\ ~\ \ `. .-~ | \ ~-. "-. ` \ ^._ ^. "-. / \ | .--~-._ ~- ` _ ~-_.-"-." ._ /._ ." ./ >--. ~-. ._ ~>-" "\\ 7 7 ] ^.___~"--._ ~-{ .-~ . `\ Y . / | <__ ~"-. ~ /_/ \ \I Y : | ^-.__ ~(_/ \ >._: | l______ ^--.,___.-~" /_/ ! `-.~"--l_ / ~"-. (_/ . ~( /' "~"--,Y -=b-. _) (_/ . \ : / l c"~o \ \ / `. . .^ \_.-~"~--. ) (_/ . ` / / ! )/ / / _. '. .': / ' ~(_/ . / _ ` .-<_ /_/ . ' .-~" `. / \ \ ,z=. ~( / ' : | K "-.~-.______// "-,. l I/ \_ __{--->._(==. //( \ < ~"~" // /' /\ \ \ ,v=. (( .^. / /\ " }__ //===- ` / / ' ' "-.,__ {---(==- .^ ' : T ~" ll -Row / . . . : | :! \\ (_/ / | | j-" ~^ ~-<_(_.^-~" "Did you see that?" "No," the second guy says. "Well, a bald eagle just flew overhead," the first guy says. "Oh," says the second guy. A couple of minutes later, The first guy says, "Did you see that?" "See what?" the second guy asks. "Are you blind? There was a big, black bear walking on that hill, over there." "Oh." A few minutes later the first guy says: "Did you see that?" By now, the second guy is getting aggravated, so he says, "Yes, I did!" And the first guy says: "Then why did you step in it?" -<>- ~"""~ /,/,/,/\\\ __ /,/,/,/,,\\`\ Y#b. /,/, \\\\D###D. d#\_/ \_/\####D d##\/, | | /,/####P d###\, (. .) ,_/####P d######\ ,v"v. ,#####P d########\ \"""/ / ###P" d########\_____/ \##P #b T########\ /##b ###b__)########`---=/###########b ############ || /#############b #######P" || // .###########H ####P || // T#########H #### || // T#######H #### ||// T#####H #### | / T###H #### |/ T#H Birgit Nietsch Q: What happened at the vampires race? A: It finished neck and neck! Q: What's a vampire's favourite drink? A: A bloody mary! Q: Why did the car stop when it saw a ghost? A: It had a nervous breakdown! Q: What do vampires sing on New Year's Eve? A: "Auld Fang Syne"! Q: In class when students say to me, "Are you Serious?" A: "Yes...like the brightest star in the night-time sky, I am Sirius!" ======================================================= >-->In The Worldly News: Justice With Judge Jeanine 6/16/18 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C6Ie5t2ARXM Trump Meets Kim and Sets the Stage for Fundamental Change in Asia -– Here's What His Critics Missed - Fox News https://tinyurl.com/y8dk5nkq Newt Gingrich: Trump Has Accomplished More Than Clinton, Bush, and Obama Combined - This Is Just the Beginning - Fox News https://tinyurl.com/y7qzbs5k Why President Trump Will Be the Greatest Civil Rights President in a Generation: Darrell Scott - Cleveland Plain Dealer https://tinyurl.com/y897k2qb WhiteHouseNews: https://www.whitehouse.gov/1600daily/ Latest From AFA: http://tinyurl.com/j7lakqw Latest From RightAlerts: http://rightalerts.com Latest At FoxNews: http://www.foxnews.com/ Latest From MRC News: https://tinyurl.com/ya6uruck Latest From TrueDailyNews: http://truedaily.news/category/news/ Students For Life https://tinyurl.com/yd5nxmu6 Latest From OperationRescue: http://www.operationrescue.org/ Move America Forward http://www.moveamericaforward.org/ Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity, Laura Ingraham, and Bill O'Reilly all are supporting Troopathon http://archive.skem1.com/csb/Public/show/b9gj-pwv8r--h4aax-2kqpjqf9 -<>- >From BizarreNews: Steer Clear of Target - A man was arrested for walking around a Target store with his genitals exposed. 21-year-old Richard Kuhn of Florida told police that he was in the store with some friends when they offered to give him $20 if he exposes himself. Kuhn decided to take the challenge and exposed himself to at least 3 women who then reported him to store employees. The employees at the Target found Kuhn and held him down until police arrived. The first woman told police that she was in the home decorating section when she noticed the man with his genitals exposed next to her. A second woman said she was in the food section when she turned around and saw a man exposing himself. A third woman was near the women's clothing area when he approached and exposed himself. All three women gave the officer a similar description of the suspect. Target officials told the officer they wanted an intrusion warning against Kuhn. The officer received an arrest warrant for Kuhn and picked him up for the misdemeanor charge. Kuhn was arrested for indecent exposure. It was not reported whether he was just double dared, or double-dog dared. -<>- A man managed to record a video of the moment a young woman got her head stuck in the tailpipe of a truck. The video shows rescue workers trying to free the woman from the tailpipe of a red pickup truck. Billy Little posted the video to Facebook with the caption: "How much alcohol does it take to get your head stuck in a diesel pickup exhaust tip?" After the video went viral, the woman came forward and shared her side of the story. 19-year-old Kaitlyn Strom said that she was at the Winstock Music Festival in Minnesota, where she drank alcohol. She explained that she was having fun with her friends when she spotted the big exhaust pipe and thought: "Hey, my head could probably fit into that." [Yeah, that sounds like alcohol, alright.] Her head did go in but it became stuck and she was unable to get out. Firefighters cut the tailpipe, and after 45 minutes, she was finally freed. She immediately apologized to the owner of the truck, Tom Wold, who she did not know. The man told her he was glad she was okay. According to Storm, the truck owner did not ask her to pay for the damages "because he was absolutely wonderful." However, the police were not so forgiving. The McLeod County Sheriff's Office cited the 19-year-old woman for underage drinking. The now-famous sawed off tailpipe is now on display in a bar. *---- High School S%x Comes with Sprinkles ----* While this story isn't exactly 'bizarre' in this day and age (more's the pity), I couldn't resist using it just for the headline. A former teacher in North Carolina is accused of having s%x with a student. 26-year-old Kayla Sprinkles, of Hayesville, was arrested for s%xual assault charges. Investigators began looking into reports that Sprinkles had engaged in s%x acts with a student while working as a high school teacher in the Cherokee County Schools System. The sheriff's office said multiple students were interviewed during the investigation. Authorities say Sprinkles left the county after learning of the indictments, possibly through social media. She later turned herself in to the Mecklenburg County Detention Center, where she was served with the indictments and released on a $25,000 unsecured bond. *--------- Cunning Escape Plain Foiled ---------* A man suspect of assaulting someone with an axe and then swimming through MacArthur Park Lake in Los Angeles to avoid police was taken into custody. The situation unfolded around 2 p.m., when authorities said a man armed with an axe threatened someone and then assaulted them with it. That suspect then swam to a small island in the middle of the lake, refusing to leave. Eventually, the man got into the water and swam around for a while before he came to shore. Firefighters hosed off the man before he was taken into custody. The victim who was attacked is expected to survive. *----------------- Spider-Coon -----------------* The saga of a raccoon that spent hours climbing the side of a 25-story Minnesota building culminated with the animal reaching the roof. The story of the raccoon, which was dubbed the MPR raccoon after first being spotted by Minnesota Public Radio workers, began when it was spotted spending more than a day apparently trapped in a niche over the first floor of the Town Square building in St. Paul. Workers attempted to rescue the raccoon by leaning a 20-foot length of lumber against the building, but the raccoon fled to the roof of the building and made its way to the neighboring UBS Tower. The raccoon captivated social media users as it began to climb the tower, one of the tallest buildings in St. Paul. The raccoon was spotted by employees of the Paige Donnelly Law Firm, located on the 23rd floor, taking a nap outside an office window as afternoon turned into evening. The raccoon was caught on video reaching the roof of the UBS Tower, where city animal control had placed live traps. MPR reporter Tim Nelson confirmed the traps succeeded in capturing the raccoon. *----- World Record-Breaking Paper Airplane -----* A Massachusetts museum is hoisting a 64-foot-long paper airplane into the air to break a Guinness World Record. The Revolving Museum in Fitchburg announced the paper plane, created under the supervision of "Project Soar" leader and local artist Jerry Beck, will be lifted by a crane at the Fitchburg Municipal Airport. A Guinness World Records adjudicator will be on hand to verify whether the 1,500- pound plane beats the previous record for a paper airplane, which was created by students and faculty at Germany's Braunschweig Institute of Technology in 2013. Beck said the project has been four years in the making and involved contributions from more than 4,500 people. "We're doing something that's never been done in the world before," Beck told the Boston Globe. "It's a beautiful montage of artwork from all ages, from a 2-year-old to a 92-year-old." ========================================================= >-->From HandyHints: _.-------------. .-'' .;'| ;==============;+' | | | | | (} (} {) (} | | | | | | .==========. | | | | _ .'"+_/)| | | | |( \( (`( | | | | | \- `. -)| | | | | ( ( _ )| | | | | `--' `' | | ; | `----------' | .' | |.' `--------------' ko1 Baking soda is by far the simplest oven cleaner I have found. Baking soda can tackle tough stains in your oven as well as stuck on grease and residual odors. Baking soda is simple to use. Make sure your oven is completely cooled down before spreading a layer of baking soda in the bottom. I like to use a water bottle to spray the baking soda until it is damp but not saturated. Repeat every few hours and watch as the particles of food in your oven begin to dissolve. -<>- You may have seen the volcano science experiment for what happens when you pour vinegar onto baking soda. Beyond entertaining you, however, baking soda can make a huge difference in the smell and the efficiency of your drains. Try adding baking soda under hot running water to freshen the drain. Baking soda can even be used in combination with hot water to unclog a drain. -<>- Do a quick clean of your bathroom every few days right after your shower. Why? This is like the kitchen tip with the boiling water in the microwave. The steam that condenses on all the surfaces in your bathroom after the shower makes it easier to wipe everything down. -<>- Regularly clean out your washing machine. Why? If you use a lot of detergent, you are going to get a buildup of soap scum over time. This stuff can get into your pipes. Run an empty cycle now and again with just a cup of white vinegar. This will help to remove soapy residue from your pipes. -<>- _ ( | | __,--./|.--,__ .` \ \ / / `. .` \ | / `. / / ^|^ \ \ / / | |o | \ \ /===/ | | | \===\ /___/ | |o | \___\ | | | | |o | | | | | |o | | | | | |o | jgs |_____/\_____| Always immediately hang clothing you take off when you walk in the door. If you need to wash it, toss it straight in your laundry basket. Don't just throw it on the bed or a chair. Once that starts, it gets right out of control! ============================================================ >-->From TheGroaner: .======================================. | ___ ___ ___ _ _ _ | | \_/ \_/ \_/ C|||C|||C||| |-| |-| |-| | | _|_ _|_ _|_ ||| ||| ||| |_| |_| |_| | '===================================== ,sSSSs DUFFY'S WATERING HOLE SSSS "( .:. SSS@ =/ \~/ C|||' SSSS_(_ _Y_ ___|||______________________________SS/ _)_) /.- [____________________________________] \ /\// | ____ ____ ____ ____ | \|==(\_/ | (____) (____) (____) (____) | (/ ; | | | | | | | | | | |____| | | | | | | | | | | \ |\ | | | | | | | | | | ) ) ) | |____| |____| |____| |____| | ( |/ | I====I I====I I====I I====I | /\ | jgs | | | | | | | | | /.(=\ Y\_\ >Is It A Spirit? A guy walks into a bar and approaches the bartender, "Can I have a pint of Less, please?" "I'm sorry sir," the bartender replies, looking slightly puzzled, "I've not come across that one before. Is it a spirit?" "I've no idea," replies the guy, "The thing is, I went to see my doctor last week and he told me that I should drink less." -<>- >The Worm Sermon A minister decided that a visual demonstration would add emphasis to his Sunday sermon. Four worms were placed into four separate jars. The first worm was put into a container of alcohol. The second worm was put into a container of cigarette smoke. The third worm was put into a container of chocolate syrup. The fourth worm was put into a container of good clean soil. At the conclusion of the sermon, the Minister reported the following results: The first worm in alcohol - Dead The second worm in cigarette smoke - Dead Third worm in chocolate syrup - Dead Fourth worm in good clean soil - Alive. So the Minister asked the congregation, "What did you learn from this demonstration?" A woman sitting in the back, quickly raised her hand and said, "As long as you drink, smoke and eat chocolate, you won't have worms!" -<>- >3 Days in the Army Fifty-one years ago, Herman James, a North Carolina mountain man, was drafted by the Army. On his first day in basic training, the Army issued him a comb. That afternoon the Army barber sheared off all his hair. On his second day, the Army issued Herman a toothbrush. That afternoon the Army dentist yanked seven of his teeth. On the third day, the Army issued him a jock strap. The Army has been looking for Herman for 51 years. -<>- === === === === ___===____________oooo___________oooo____________===___ |___===___________________________________________===___| === | /O O\ | === dwb || || jrb === || || === ( | _ | ) || ( ) || _ || _/_-_\_ || \ ooooO /___|___\ Ooooo == ((( )|____^____|( ))) / \ (|)MMMMM| |#####(|) |MILK| (_)MMMM/ \####(_) |____| --------------------------------------------------------------------- __ ____ ___ __ ___ ___ ( )(_ _) ( \ / \( _)/ __) )( )( ) ) )( () )) _)\__ \ (__) (__) (___/ \__/(___)(___/ ____ _ _ ___ ___ __ ___ _ _ __ __ __ ___ _ (_ _)( )( )( _) ( ,) / \( \( \/ ) / _) / \ / \( \ / \ )( )__( ) _) ) ,\( () )) ) )\ / ( (/\( () )( () )) ) )\_/ (__) (_)(_)(___) (___/ \__/(___/(__/ \__/ \__/ \__/(___/ (_) >At the Dairy Bar Two cartons of yogurt walk into a bar. The bartender, who was a tub of cottage cheese, says to them, "We don't serve your kind in here." One of the yogurt cartons says back to him, "Why not? We're cultured individuals." -<>- >Q and A Quickies Q: What happened to the sun burnt banana? A: It started to peel. Q: Why did God make only one Yogi Bear? A: Because when he tried to make a second one he made a Boo-Boo. Q: Why do hens lay eggs? A: If they dropped them, they'd break. Q: Why do elephants have trunks? A: Because they would look silly with glove compartments. ========================================================= >-->From CleanLaffs: `, ___ # /_,/\ |/ ? /" ( | , )\ .Y___ / /__/\ \____ \(__ ,- / \_/ \ / (\ |/| / < _____ _> \ |. ||\ -|.|--/___/ ,___/___\------'-----' '-' |\/ b'ger Eric is sitting at the bar staring morosely into his beer. Tom walks in and sits down. After trying to start a conversation several times and getting only distracted grunts he asks Eric what the problem is. "Well," said Eric, "I ran afoul of one of those trick questions women ask. Now I'm in deep trouble at home." "What kind of question?" asked Tom. "My wife asked me if I would still love her if when she was old, fat and ugly." "That's easy," said Tom. "You just say 'Of course I will.'" "Yeah," said Eric, "That's what I did, except I said, 'Of course I DO....'" -<>- I was recovering from surgery when a charity representative phoned asking me to take part in a door-to-door fund-raising effort. "Sorry," I replied, "but I've been incapacitated." Undaunted, the caller kept trying to convince me to change my mind and volunteer. I interrupted and said, "I'm incapacitated. Do you know what that means?" She hesitated. "It means your head was cut off?" -<>- One day, an employee received an unusually large paycheck. She decided not to say anything about it. The following week, her check was short the overpayment she received the previous week. So she confronted her boss about it. "How come," her boss inquired, "you didn't say anything when you were overpaid?" Unperturbed, the employee replied, "Well, I can overlook one mistake - but two in a row is getting unacceptable!" -<>- "What's your father's occupation?" asked the school secretary on the first day of the new academic year. "He's a magician, ma'am" said Little Johnny. "How interesting. What's his favorite trick?" "He saws people in half." "Wow! Now, next question. Any brothers or sisters?" "One half brother and two half sisters." -<>- Five surgeons are having drinks together at a surgical convention and making jokes... The first, a Florida surgeon, says: "I like to see accountants on my operating table, because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered." The second, a Michigan surgeon, responds: "Yeah, but you should try electricians. Everything inside of them is color coded." The third, a California surgeon, says: "No, I really think librarians are the best; everything inside of them is in alphabetical order." The fourth, an New York surgeon, chimes in: "You know, I like construction workers. Those guys always understand when you have a few parts left over." But the fifth, from Washington D.C. shut them all up when he observed, "You're all wrong. Politicians are the easiest to operate on. There's no guts, no heart, no brains, no spine, and the head and the ass are interchangeable." -<>- While at a marine-supply store stocking up on equipment for my boat, I also purchased an inflatable life preserver. "It was my wife's idea," I explained to the grizzled salesman at the counter. "She's buying it for me as a gift." "Lucky you," he said as he started to write up the order. "My wife got me a length of chain and a cement block." ========================================================= >-->From TheMouth: ,-`"-=') =/////// ,== _,_(((((-`6\ ==.| /,,...\\\C _| .--. ((((\\\\\` _, /;_| )9 )))))./ `. / } _\,_ ,-'))) \ / /=-. ,-./ \/ '))) . /\_/ / \ (,-.%\ / /-' ') \/\ / ( \ (/ \ ' /( ' `-/ \( \ ,- / ( `-' \ . / / \ \ &_) /\ \ | ( /--.- \ \----,------=;% | _/ _); `. ` `-. .`\ ) +++/ \ ,," %&-. ; \\| `-` `-=.;_,.__.__\_,/ )_/___+_/_________\,"(_//_(__)______:-._) gpyy >The Top 10 Signs You Have A Bad History Teacher 1. Constantly gets Indonesia and Outdonesia confused. 2. As incentive for learning, when you name a state capital, you get to take a shot. 3. Insists that one of Popes during the Roman empire was Pope Bubba. 4. Thinks that Mussolini was Hitler's favorite pasta. 5. Counts Puerto Rico, Mexico and Canada as "technically" U.S. States. 6. Tells you that it's Napoleon that's the ice cream that comes in 3 flavors in one box. 7. Insists that the Great Depression could have been stopped with the right amount of Lithium. 8. Threatens to reenact Salem Witch Trials/Burnings if homework is not turned in on time. 9. Claims that it was Martin and Lewis that were the great explorers of the West. 10. Credits David Hasselhoff and not Democracy for the fall of the Berlin Wall. (From Aha!Jokes) -<>- __ __------ __/o `\ ,~ _~~ . .. pb. .. ~ -. ,' _~----- `\ ~~~--_'__ `~-==-~~~~~---' >Thoughts for today 1. Birds of a feather flock together and crap on your car. 2. There's always a lot to be thankful for if you take time to look for it. For example I am sitting here thinking how nice it is that wrinkles don't hurt. 3. When I'm feeling down, I like to whistle. It makes the neighbor's dog run to the end of his chain and gag himself. 4. If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague. 5. Don't assume malice for what stupidity can explain. 6. A penny saved is a government oversight. 7. The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right time, but also to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment. 8. The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat are really good friends. 9. The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement. 10. He who hesitates is probably right. 11. If you think there is good in everybody, you haven't met everybody. 12. If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame. 13. The sole purpose of a child's middle name is so he can tell when he's really in trouble. 14. Did you ever notice: When you put the 2 words "The" and "IRS" together it spells "THEIRS" ========================================================= >-->FUN Places To Net Visit :) Just Thinking http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/thinking.html Let's Dance http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/dance.html Real Old West http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/oldwest.html Think Positive http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/positive.html Bruno's Fantasy Art http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/fantasyart.html Chalk Art 6 http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/chalkart6.html Incredible Finger Painter http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/fingerpainter.html Animal Friends3 http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/animalfriends3.html Cat Owner Tips http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/catowners.html Incredible Animals http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/incredibleanimals.html Orang-Utan Hospital http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/orang.html Underwater Life Of Eliat http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/underwater.html Antique Automobiles http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/antiquecars.html Amazon Warehouses http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/amazoncenter.html Humorous Signs 2 http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/hsigns2.html Only ONE Job 3 http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/onejob3.html -<>- >Please Visit/Follow Me On StumbleUpon: https://tinyurl.com/y9fngu9 -<>- ROAD FOOD Taking a road trip? Wouldn't you like to know the unique kinds of foods that line the highway? Well, Roadfood.com is the only cool web site devoted exclusively to finding the most memorable local eateries along the highways and back roads of America. https://roadfood.com/ Dear Hollywood: These Are The Movies Fans ACTUALLY Wanted Cracked.com: It's great how movie studios are cranking out tons of deep dives into specific characters and details of cinematic universes. What's not so great is that they never seem to focus on the characters and stories fans actually want to hear about. We're nothing but helpful, here at Cracked, so we asked readers to show us the movies the studios should have made, instead of the ones they did make. https://tinyurl.com/yckgh846 Learn How to draw Captain Underpants, Create your own superhero cape, do a Robo-Boxers word challenge and more! http://www.whenhamstersattack.com/fun-stuff FLOWER MAKER Make your own beautiful flowers with this fun web site. Choose different petal styles and colors to make a creation all your own. http://www.zefrank.com/flowers/ Animals Can Be Jerks! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZMel6h2jywk Best Fails of the Year 2017: Part 2 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bf2ASh5vS-s -<>- >From Our Friend LouiseAu :) Adrien Wild performs his amazing magic with his beautiful assistant Roxanne at the French television show 'The World's Greatest Cabaret.' https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0REB81gmzbY Martin Daniels, son of magic legend Paul Daniels, performs his dad's all-time favorite trick. Music: "Phantom of the Opera" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aCZLdDnAHyU In honor of Father's Day, here are some of the most memorable dad moments from Disney films. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OwxukOAXKl8 --- ...Love These! Thanks LouiseAu! ======================================================= >-->Quotes & Thunkers: "Nordstrom is launching a new home and wellness collection that features a marijuana-scented candle. You can use it to cover up the smell when you get stoned on vanilla." -Seth Meyers "This Sunday is Father's Day. With the big day coming up, a lot of people are shopping for the perfect Father's Day card, and while there are lots of good choices, there are also some very unpopular cards out there. For example, this card says, 'Dad, you taught me everything I know.' Open up, it says, 'That's why I'm so messed up.'" -Jimmy Fallon "Last week, a 90-year-old letter to Santa Claus was found in a chimney. On the bright side, the 96-year-old who wrote the letter is still alive and finally got that tricycle." -Conan O'Brien "There is a Japanese pop band whose members are all over 80 years old. The band is known for their No. 1 hit song, 'Where Am I?'" -Conan O'Brien "A plane in Holland was forced to make an emergency landing after a passenger's body odor was so bad that it caused others to vomit and faint. You know it's bad when people are going into the airplane bathroom for some fresh air." -James Corden "Facebook has announced a new page called 'Memories' that will show users photos from the past. It's better than the original title for the page, 'When You Were Thinner.'" -Seth Meyers "Italian chefs recently set a new world record after making a mile-long pizza that took five ovens and over 11 hours to bake. It got weird when the person who ordered the pizza was like, 'Ooh, I said no pepperoni.'" -Jimmy Fallon "Here's some strange fashion news. According to The New York Times, the monocle is back in style. Unless you're a Batman villain or a giant salted peanut, you should not wear a monocle." -Jimmy Kimmel "I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it." --Groucho Marx "My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met." --Rodney Dangerfield "A hypocrite is a person who--but who isn't?" --Don Marquis "I hate quotations. Tell me what you know." - Ralph Waldo Emerson "As a matter of principle, I never attend the first annual anything." - George Carlin "Any fool can make a rule, and any fool will mind it." - Henry David Thoreau >Updated FUN STUFF URLS - Oh Yeah :) Shangy! ------------------------------------------------------------------------ http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/urls.html FUN URLS ------------------------------------------------------------------------ -->FULL LENGTH - FREE On line AUDIO MP3 Christian Foundational Class http://www.truthortradition.com/modules.php?name=News&file=article&sid=61 NEW LIFE IN CHRIST! ------------------------------------------------------------------------ -->This is for all you who love food and DARE to make it at home Yep. You guessed it - Recipes. These are Tried and True, Yummy to the Tummy, good old fashioned home cooking recipes that are EASY to do :) Visit Shangy's Easy-Does-It Home Recipes: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/easy.html Home Recipes >Got A good Recipe? SHARE IT HERE: Share A Recipe ************************************************************************ >TO SUBSCRIBE:Visit Here This Weeks regular Shangy emails OR For the Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com ************************************************************************