Halloween Smiles! ... :) Shangy! >Here are the details on our Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com To UnSubscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com Group home page: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ShangyFunList Through no fault of my own we suddenly became an adult club in the love and romance directory so you will have to confirm that you are an adult when you go here. I still have no idea how to change this back as it sends me around in a circle when I try! or Web Site: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/ShangyFunList.html Group email address: ShangyFunList@yahoogroups.com or email me here: bcrsystems@earthlink.net ================ * NOTE: An easy way to adjust the size of print in email or any page is to hold down the Ctrl tab while moving the scroll button on the mouse. You can also use the keyboard to change the font size in your web browser or emails. Hold down the Ctrl key while pressing the + key for larger text or the - key for smaller text! ================ __, ,____) __, ,____) (--| | (--| | |__| _, _ _ |__| _ || _ _ _ ,_ _| |(_||_)|_)(_| _| |(_|||(_)(_|_)(/_(/_| | ( | | ,_| ( |_, .:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:. >>> Halloween Pages/Links: <<< Fear: Feeling Kind Of Buggy http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/BibleStudy/fearfeelingkindofbuggy.html Haunting http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/BibleStudy/haunting.html Chapel With Bone Art! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/chapel.html Casa Batllo - House Of Bones http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/hbones.html Extreme Pumpkin Art http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/pumpkin.html Extreme Pumpkin Art 2 http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/pumpkin2.html Darvaza - Door To Hell! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/darvaza.html Farmers Gone Wild! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/farm.html Strange Tombstones! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/tombstones.html Sweet Baby Overload http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/sweetoverload.html Horse Costumes http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/horsecostumes.html Tricks For Treats http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/tricksfortreats.html Tricks For Treats 2 http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/tricksfortreats2.html Tricks For Treats 3 http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/tricksfortreats3.html Tricks For Treats 4 http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/tricksfortreats4.html Halloween Cakes http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/hcakes.html Halloween Cakes 2 http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/hcakes2.html Halloween Lip Art http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/lipart2.html Enter At Your Own Risk! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/risky.html Maxine On Fall http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/maxineonfall.html Maxine On Halloween http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/maxineonhalloween.html Crop Circle Mystery! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/mystery.html Crop Circle Mystery 2! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/mystery2.html Weird Rainy Days! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/rainyday.html Endangered Wolf! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/wolf.html Romantic Castles! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/castles.html World's Largest Web http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/web.html WORMS! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/worms.html Tech Horror Stories! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/tech.html Scientists Unveil New Species http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/newspecies.html ANIMATIONS: Bats, Bones, Boo, Devil, Dracula: http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/agifs.html Fall, Frankenstein, Ghost, Halloween, Haunted House http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/agifs_f-j.html Monsters http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/agifs_k-o.html Pumpkins http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/agifs_p-t.html The following page allows you to use the left hand side letters to display all the graphics at once on one page - [Word: = Comments Hal and Hallo = Halloween] Vampire, Vulture, Witch, Wolf, Words:Hal-boop, Words:Hallo http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/agifs_u-z.html -<>- >-->Hot Off The 'Shangy' Press :) This new scorcher is from our friends Linda and PatDeE. You never hear much about the old time invention ideas that didn't make it - perhaps when you see some of these vehicles you'll understand why! Some are just scary! .-"""". / \ __ / .-. .\ / `\ / \/ \ | _ \/ .==.==. | ( \ /____\__\ \ \ (_()(_() \ \ '---._ \ \_ /\ |` (__)________/ / \| /\___/ | \ \||VV | \ \|"""", | \ ______) \ \ /` jgs \( Weird Old Vehicles! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/oldvehicles.html --- ...Wow! Amazing! Love these! Thanks Linda And PatDeE! ======================================================= >-->From TheFunnyBone: ___ (___) Carjacking Foiled: /` `\ / /"\ \ An elderly lady did her shopping and upon \_/o o\_/ return found 4 males in her car. She dropped ( _ ) her shopping bags and drew her handgun, `\ /` proceeding to scream at them at the top of /\\V//\ her voice that she knows how to use it and / /_ _\ \ that she will if required.... so get out of \ \___/ / the car. \/===\/ || || The 4 men didn't wait around for a second || || invitation but got out and ran like mad, ||___|| where upon the lady proceeded to load her |_____| shopping bags into the back of the car jgs ||| and got into the drivers seat. Small / Y \ problem, her key wouldn't fit the ignition. `"`"` Her car was identical and parked four or five spaces further down. She loaded her bags into her car and drove to the police station. The sergeant that she told the story to nearly tore himself in two with laughter and pointed to the other end of the counter where four pale white males were reporting a car-jacking by a mad, elderly, white woman......no charges were filed. _ _ (_'-----------------------------------------------'_) (_.===============================================._) The Six Phases of a Project in Any Organization 1. Enthusiasm 2. Disillusionment 3. Panic 4. Search for the Guilty 5. Punishment of the Innocent 6 Praise & Honors for the Nonparticipants ======================================================= +------------ BIZARRE HOLIDAYS ------------+ October 27 is National Tell a Story Day - in Scotland and the U.K. October 28 is Plush Animal Lover's Day October 29 is Hermit Day October 29 is National Frankenstein Day October 30 os National Candy Corn Day and Mischief Night October 31 Carve a Pumpkin Day and Frankenstein Friday ======================================================= >-->From GoodCleanFun: .:\:/:. .:\:\:/:/:. :.:\:\:/:/:.: :=.' - - '.=: '=(\ 9 9 /)=' ( (_) ) /`-vvv-'\ / \ / /|,,,,,|\ \ /_// /^\ \\_\ WW( ( ) )WW __\,,\ /,,/__ jgs (______Y______) >Generation Gap My five-year-old son and I were discussing some of the differences between his childhood and mine. I pointed out that when I was young, we didn't have things such as Nintendo, cellphones, computers or digital cameras. I realized just how huge the generation gap was when he asked me: "Did you have fruit?" -<>- >Live to 100? When my grandmother was in her eighties, she decided to move to Israel. As part of the preparations, she went to see her doctor and get all her charts. The doctor asked her how she was doing, so she gave him the litany of complaints -- this hurts, that's stiff, I'm more tired and I'm slower, etc., etc., etc. He responded with, "Mrs. Weiss, you have to expect things to start deteriorating. After all, who wants to live to 100?" My grandmother looked him straight in the eye and replied, "Anyone who's 99." -<>- >Loaner Car Saving for a new car on a teacher's salary takes a while. So while I was saving, a mechanic friend loaned me an old junker to use. It was so beat up, even its dents had dents. I came out of school one day to find a police officer and a woman examining it. "What's going on?" I asked. "I saw this lady hit your car," the cop explained. "But I can't figure out where." -<>- >Translation A company was doing an English-language movie where, at one point, an exhausted messenger was supposed to dash in, collapse, and gasp out a vital message in Swahili. They even found someone who knew the language, and the scene worked beautifully in the movie -- until it played in an African town where Swahili was well-known. A moment of high drama nose-dived into comedy as the panting messenger gasped out: "I don't think I am being paid enough for this part!" -<>- >Warranty A man came back to the dealer from whom he bought a new car. "I believe you gave me a guarantee with my car," he said. "That's right, sir," the salesman answered. "During the warranty period we will replace anything that breaks." "Fine, I need a new garage door." ========================================================= >-->HALLOWEEN SMILES , , /(.-""-.)\ |\ \/ \/ /| | \ / =. .= \ / | \( \ o\/o / )/ \_, '-/ \-' ,_/ / \__/ \ \ \__/\__/ / ___\ \|--|/ /___ /` \ / `\ jgs / '----' \ Q: Why don't witches like to ride their brooms when they're angry? A: They're afraid of flying off the handle. Q: Who won the skeleton beauty contest? A: No body. Q: What do skeletons say before they begin dining? A: Bone appetite! Q: Where do baby ghosts go during the day? A: Dayscare centers. Q: Who did Frankenstein take to the prom? A: His ghoul friend. Q: What monster flies his kite in a rain storm? A: Benjamin Frankenstein. Q: What do ghosts serve for dessert? A: Ice Scream. .-. .' `. :g g : : o `. : ``. : `. : : . `. : : ` . `. `.. : `. ``; `:; `:' : `. jgs `. `. . `'`'`'`---..,___`;.-' Q: What's a monster's favorite play? A: Romeo and Ghouliet. Q: What do you get when you cross Bambi with a ghost? A: Bamboo. Q: What's a haunted chicken? A: A poultry-geist. Q: How can you tell when you're in bed with Count Dracula? A: He has a big D on his pajamas. Q: What's pink and gray and wrinkly and old and belongs to Grandpa monster? A: Grandma monster. Q: Why did the monster eat a light bulb? A: Because he was in need of a light snack. Q: Why are most monsters covered in wrinkles? A: Have you ever tried to iron a monster? Q: What kind of mistakes do spooks make? A: Boo boos. .-. ( " ) /\_.' '._/\ | | \ / \ /` (__) / jgs`.__.' Q: Why couldn't Dracula's wife get to sleep? A: Because of his coffin. Q: Why do mummies make excellent spies? A: They're good at keeping things under wraps. Q: What kind of cereal do monsters eat? A: Ghost-Toasties. Q: What kind of monster is safe to put in the washing machine? A: A wash and wear wolf. Q: What's the first thing ghosts do when they get into a car? A: They boo-kle their seatbelts. Q: What has webbed feet, feathers, fangs and goes quack-quack? A: Count Duckula. Q: What do you call a person who puts poison in a person's corn flakes? A: A cereal killer. Q: Why are monsters huge and hairy and ugly? A: Because if they were small and round and smooth they'd be M&Ms. Q: Why wasn't there any food left after the monster party? A: Because everyone was a goblin! .--. / ..\ ____.' _o/ .--. '--. |.__ /.. \ _.-' /--' \ o / _.--' / / \ ~'--....___.-' / \ (/ \) ,_ | \ |`\ \ '._ \ `'-._ '._ '-. \ '-._/) `'- ,~- _.` '. '.--. jgs `-., / ..`\ .--. //'-. o / /.. \ (/ '--' \o _ (____ __.| .--' '---\ '. , '. '-.___.-'/ '-.__ _.' ````` Q: How did the Great Pumpkin fix the hole in his pants? A: With a pumpkin patch. Q: What do witches use on their hair? A: Scare spray. Q: What is as sharp as a vampires fang? A: His other fang. Q: What do the birds sing on Halloween? A: Twick or Tweet. Q: What did the little ghost have in his rock collection? A: Tombstones. -<>- , , / \ / \ |/\ \ _,_ / /\| || \ |.-" "-.| / || || / -.\\ //.- \ || \\_ | /o`^'o\ | _// `--| `"/ \"` |--` ; |\__"__/| ; \\ \/^\/ // \\ // jgs \\-.-// \`"`/ `'` >Halloween Definitions Boogieman: The guy who passes time at a stoplight picking his nose. Coffin: What you do when you get a piece of popcorn stuck in your throat. Frankenstein: Hot dog and a mug of beer. Full Moon: What your repairman reveals when he bends over to fix your fridge. Goblin: How you eat the Snickers bars you got for Halloween. Invisible Man: What a guy becomes when there's housework to be done. Jack O' Lantern: An Irish Pumpkin. Jack the Ripper: What Jack does to his lottery tickets after losing each week. Mummy: The person who kisses the boo-boo after you scrape your knee. Pumpkin Patch: What a pumpkin wears when trying to quit smoking. Skeleton: Any supermodel. Vampire Bat: What Dracula hits a baseball with. Zombie: What you look like before that first cup of morning coffee. -<>- >Top Ten Reasons You Won't Win the Halloween Costume Contest 10. After your roommate insisted on being the front legs, you began to suspect that a burrito dinner wasn't such a good idea. 9. "Hey! Blue dress with a stain and a cigar! Why didn't I think of that?" 8. You can't get the zipper on your Bill Clinton costume to stay down. 7. Looks like "Viagra Man" will be spending Halloween in jail for indecent exposure. 6. Something in her eyes tells you there was an inherent flaw in your plan of dressing up as the hostess's dead husband in order to get laid. 5. The Bride of Frankenstein had big, pointy hair and a small round bottom, not the other way around. 4. 'Cause you should know that wearing a white sheet in Atlanta could only lead to getting your butt whupped, Homeboy. 3. Your "Naked Linda Tripp" costume is actually more nauseating than scary. 2. The judges wrongly interpreted your "Liposuction Byproduct" costume as a "Bowl of Tapioca Pudding" costume. 1. *Nobody* likes a farting clown. ======================================================= >-->From Our Friend LouiseA :) , , \'. .'/ ),\ /,( /__\'. .'/__\ \ `'.'-.__ __.-'.'` / `) `'-. \ / .-'` (' / _.--'\ '. , , .' /'--._ \ |-'` '. '-.__ / \ / \ __.-' .' `'-| \ _.`'-.,_'-.|/\ \ _,_ / /\|.-'_,.-'`._ / `\ .-' /'-.|| \ |.-" "-.| / ||.-'\ '-. /` )-'` .' :|| / -.\\ //.- \ ||: '. `'-( / .' / \\_ | /o`^'o\ | _// \ '. \ \ .-' .' `--| `"/ \"` |--` '. '-. / `) _.' .' .--.; |\__"__/| ;.--. '. '._ (' /_.' .-' _.-' \\ \/^\/ // `-._ '-. '._\ \ .'`_.--' \\ // `--._`'. / '-._' /` _ \\-.-// _ `\ '_.-' `< _,..--''`| \`"`/ |`''--..,_ >` _\ ``--..__ \ `'` / __..--`` /_ / '-.__ ``'-; / \ ;-'`` __.-' \ | _ ``''--.. \'-' | '-'/ ..--''`` _ | \ '-. / |/--|--\| \ .-' / '-._ '-._ / |---|---| \ _.-' _.-' `'-._ '/ / / /---|---\ \ \ \' _.-'` '-./ / / / \`---`/ \ \ \ \.-' `)` ` /'---'\ ` `(` jgs /` | | `\ / / | | | | \ \ .--' / | '. .' | \ '--. /_____/| / \._\ /_./ \ |\_____\ (/ (/' \) (/ `\) \) >Have y ou noticed.... Have you noticed that lately everything seems uphill from where you are? Stairs are steeper. Groceries are heavier. And, everything is farther away. Yesterday I walked to the corner and I was dumbfounded to discover how long our street had become! And, you know, people are less considerate young ones. They speak in whispers all the time! If you ask them to speak up they just keep repeating themselves, endlessly mouthing the same silent message until they're red in the face! What do they think I am, a lip reader? I also think they are much younger than I was at the same age. On the other hand, people who used to be my own age are so much older than I am now. I ran into an old friend the other day and she has aged so much that she didn't even recognize me. I got to thinking about the poor dear while I was combing my hair this morning, and I glanced at my own reflection... Well, REALLY NOW ... even mirrors are not made the way they used to be! Another thing -- everyone drives so fast today! You're risking life and limb if you just happen to pull onto the freeway in front of them. All I can say is, their brakes must wear out awfully fast, the way I see them screech and swerve in my rear view mirror. Clothing manufacturers are less civilized these days. Why else would they suddenly start labeling a size 10 or 12 dress as 18 or 20? Do they think no one notices that these things no longer fit around the waist, hips, thighs, and bosom? The people who make bathroom scales are pulling the same prank, but in reverse. Do they think I actually "believe" the number I see on that dial? HA! I would never let myself weigh that much! Just who do these people think they're fooling? I'd like to call up someone in authority to report what's going on -- but the telephone company is in on the conspiracy too: they've printed the phone books in such small type that no one could ever find a number in here! All I can do is pass along this warning: Maturity is under attack! Unless something drastic happens, pretty soon "everyone" will have to suffer these awful indignities. PLEASE PASS THIS ON TO EVERYONE YOU KNOW AS SOON AS POSSIBLE SO WE CAN GET THIS CONSPIRACY STOPPED! --- ...TeeHee! Thanks LouiseA! -<>- , , /( )\ \ \_/ / , /\ , /_ _\ /| || |\ | \> SMILES A patient was waiting nervously in the examination room of a famous specialist. "So who did you see before coming to me?" asked the important doctor. "My local General Practitioner, Dr. Cohen." "Your GP?" scoffed the doctor. "What a waste of time. Tell me, what sort of useless advice did Cohen give you?" "He told me to come and see you." -------- On their way home after celebrating their 25th. anniversary, she thanks him for a wonderful evening. "Oh. it's not over yet", says he. Once in the house, he gives her a little black velvet box. She opens it in anticipation, "But what are these two little pills?" "Aspirin", says he. "But I don't have a headache," says she. "There you are, I told you the evening wasn't over yet." -------- These two persons are discussing whether the state of Hawaii is pronounced "Havaii" or "Hawaii." So there they stood arguing and arguing, until they decided to ask a person that was walking by. So they asked a gentleman: "Excuse me sir, is Hawaii pronounced 'Hawaii' or 'Havaii?'" The gentleman said, "Havaii." So they both looked at each other, and as the gentleman was leaving, one of the two said to him, "Thank you." The gentleman replied, You're velcome." -------- >Don't Mess With Seniors A married couple are traveling by car from Victoria to Prince George. Being Seniors, after almost eleven hours on the road, they were too tired to continue, and decided to take a room. But, they only planned to sleep for four hours and then get back on the road. When they checked out four hours later, the desk clerk handed them a bill for $350.00. The man explodes and demands to know why the charge is so high. He told the clerk although it's a nice hotel; the rooms certainly aren't worth $350.00 for four hours! Then the clerk tells him that $350.00 is the 'standard rate'. He insisted on speaking to the Manager. The Manager appears, listens to him, and then explains that the hotel has an Olympic-sized pool and a huge conference center that were available for them to use. "But we didn't use them," the husband said. ''Well, they are here, and you could have," explained the Manager. The Manager went on to explain that the couple could also have taken in one of the shows for which the hotel is famous. "We have the best entertainers from New York, Hollywood, and Las Vegas perform here", the Manager says. "But we didn't go to any of those shows," the husband said. "Well, we have them, and you could have," the Manager replied. No matter what amenity the Manager mentioned, the husband replied, "But we didn't use it!" The Manager is unmoved, and eventually the husband gave up and agreed to pay. As he didn't have the check book, he asked his wife to write the check. She did and gave it to the Manager. The Manager is surprised when he looks at the check. "But ma'am, this is only made out for $50.00." ''That's correct. I charged you $300.00 for sleeping with me," she replied. "But I didn't!" exclaims the Manager.. "Well, too bad, I was here, and you could have." Don't mess with senior citizens. They didn't get there by being stupid! --- ...LOL! Good Ones! Thanks LouiseA! ========================================================= >-->In The Worldly News: >From Our Friend Melody :) Voter Fraud http://tinyurl.com/mp8u8r2 California Orders Churches to Pay for Abortions http://tinyurl.com/qj6ukh4 --- ...Stupid when Gov. thinks it can play God/god. Thanks Melody! -<>- >Top News From AFA http://www.afa.net/ -<>- >From BizarreNews: There are easier ways to make money than stabbing yourself in the eyes with pencils. Granted, the monetary potential of such an action may not be immediately apparent, and it probably wasn't the first thought of the woman who did it to herself, but you certainly can't argue that she had dollars in her eyes (if you'll pardon the expression) after the incident. It started after a California woman attempted to commit suicide by this extraordinarily bizarre method. While she was unsuccessful at suicide, she was subject to a curious photographer while being treated for her injuries. Now she is suing Los Angeles County, claiming the photo snapped at the hospital and went viral online. The suit was filed by the guardian of the woman, who was blinded by the attempt. The suit claims unauthorized disclosure of medical information. The woman, identified only as Jane Doe, was admitted to County-USC Medical Center about 2 years ago. The suit says someone, believed to be a nurse, took an unauthorized photo of her with pencils in her eyes and shared it with someone who posted it to the Internet, where it's been viewed some 200,000 times. *-- Firefighters free 18-month-old from claw machine --* MARYVILLE, Tenn. (UPI) - Firefighters in Tennessee freed an 18-month-old boy who climbed into stuffed animal claw machine while his grandmother's back was turned at a laundromat. Diane O'Neill, grandmother of Maryville toddler Colin Lambert, said she looked up from checking a text message Tuesday at the laundromat just in time to see the boy climbing into the machine through the prize slot. "All I could see was his feet. He had already crawled in," she told WBIR-TV. "I grabbed his feet and he kicked my hand and got in. Climbed up over the glass partition and sat down in the toys." The boy was rescued by firefighters within a matter of minutes and they allowed Colin to keep one of the stuffed animals from inside the machine. O'Neill told WATE-TV, Knoxville, her grandson is a "sweet little monster" with a tendency to climb his way into trouble. "Nothing surprises me with him. You just have to expect the worst and usually it happens," she said. Colin's mom, Bridget Lambert, said she wasn't at all surprised by the incident. "She tells me and shows me a picture and my husband and I started laughing, because we're not surprised. It was a matter of time before he did something like this," Lambert said. Colin is not the first toddler to need emergency assistance for an escape from a toy machine. Earlier this year, a 3-year-old in Nebraska wandered from home to a bowling alley across the street and was discovered playing with the stuffed animals inside a "Bear Claw" machine. *-- Man apologizes for double 'wet Willy' on policeman --* MANKATO, Minn. (UPI) - A U.S. Airman on leave in Minnesota said he was "sorely mistaken" when he "thought it would be incredibly funny to give a police officer a wet Willy." Riley Louis Swearingen, 24, of Goldsboro, N.C., pleaded guilty to a misdemeanor disruptive intoxication charge Monday in connection with a Saturday incident involving the defendant, two moistened fingers and both of a Mankato police sergeant's ears. District Judge Kurt Johnson heard Swearingen, who is visiting Minnesota while on leave from the Air Force, was boarding the "drunk bus" after the downtown bars closed early Saturday, when he decided to carry out a "wet Willy" prank when he spotted a uniformed police sergeant. Swearingen licked a finger on each hand and then inserted them into both of the sergeant's ears, the court heard. Cmdr. Jeremy Clifton said Swearingen was immediately arrested. A charge of assaulting a police officer with bodily fluids was dropped in exchange for Swearingen's guilty plea. "I thought it would be incredibly funny to give a police officer a wet Willy, to which I was sorely mistaken," Swearingen told Johnson. "I'm incredibly sorry for what I did. I never thought I would be going to jail for the weekend." Swearingen was sentenced to the three days he had already spent in jail and ordered to pay $77 in court costs. *-- Alleged drunk driver thought jail was a bar --* PAW PAW, Mich. (UPI) - Police in Michigan said an alleged drunk driver pulled into the county jail parking lot and thought she had arrived at another bar. The Van Buren County Sheriff's Office said the 39-year-old Hartford woman, whose name was not released, pulled into the county jail parking lot just after 2 a.m. Sunday and was seen trying to convince her boyfriend to get back into her vehicle. Deputies said the woman smelled heavily of alcohol and a breathalyzer test indicated her blood alcohol content was more than twice the legal limit of .08. Police said the woman admitted to investigators she had been out drinking at a bar and she had believed the parking lot was for another bar. The sheriff's office said the woman is expected to face drunken driving related charges. *-- Lawsuit: Man awoke from surgery in pink panties --* DOVER, Del. (UPI) - A Delaware man's lawsuit alleges he awoke from anesthesia after a colonoscopy procedure to find he had been dressed in a pair of pink panties. The New Castle County Superior Court lawsuit, filed by attorney Gary Nitsche on behalf of Andrew Walls, 32, said Walls was employed by the Delaware Surgery Center in Dover when he underwent a colonoscopy procedure at the facility in 2012. Nitsche said his client was put under anesthesia during the procedure and he awoke after surgery to find someone had dressed him in pink women's underwear. "When the plaintiff initially presented for his colonoscopy he had not been wearing pink women's underwear and at no time did the plaintiff voluntarily, knowingly or intentionally place the pink women's underwear upon himself," the lawsuit states. Jennifer Anderson, director of the Delaware Surgery Center, declined to comment Wednesday. "We just found out about this yesterday afternoon," she told the News Journal. The lawsuit, which also names the Eden Hill Surgical Group of Dover, alleges Walls suffered "severe emotional stress," and Nitsche wrote his client is seeking compensation for mental anguish, lost wages and loss of earning capacity. ========================================================= >-->From Our Friend PatDeE :) ###, ,##, ,##, # # # # # # ### # # # # # # # # # # ###' '##' '##' .--, / ( / \ / \ / 0 0 \ ((() | () | ())) \ () ( .____. ) () / |` \_/ \ `""` / \_/ `| | `.'--'.` | \ `""` / \ / `. .' , jgs |` | _.'| | `-' / \ .' `.____________.-' [politics] A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote pasture when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust. The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses and YSL tie, leaned out the window and asked the cowboy, "If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, Will you give me a calf?" Bud looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, Why not?" The yuppie parks his car, whips out his iPad, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo. The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany... Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses an MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response. Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet printer, turns to the cowboy and says, "You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves." "That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says Bud. He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on with amusement as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car. Then Bud says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?" The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?" "You're an aide in the Obama Administration", says Bud. "Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?" "No guessing required." answered the cowboy. "You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked. You used millions of dollars worth of equipment trying to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don't know a thing about how working people make a living - or about cows, for that matter. This is a herd of sheep! Now give me back my dog! --- ...LOL! Thanks PatDeE! ========================================================= >-->From CleanLaffs: .--. .-, .-..-.__ .'(`.-` \_.-'-./` |\_( "\__ __.>\ '; _;---,._| / __/`'--) /.--. : |/' _.--.<| / | | _..-' `\ /' /` /_/ _/_/ >_.-``-. `Y /' _;---.`|/)))) '` .-''. \|: \.' __, .-'"` .'--._ `-: \/: /' '.\ _|_ /.'`\ :; /' `- `-|-` -` | | | :.; : | .-'~^~`-. |: | .' _ _ `. |:. | | |_) | |_) | :. : | | | \ | | | .jgs. : ; | | -."-/\\\/:::. `\."-._'."-"_\\-| |///."- " -."-.\\"-."//.-".`-."_\\-.".-\\`=.........=`//-". I was faced with a difficult decision recently and asked my friends what I should do. This is what I got... Beware of Greeks bearing gifts. Don't look a gift horse in the mouth. A silent man is a wise one. A man without words is a man without thoughts. Look before you leap. He who hesitates is lost. Many hands make light work. Too many cooks spoil the broth. Actions speak louder than words. The pen is mightier than the sword. Clothes make the man. Don't judge a book by its cover. It's the squeaky wheel that gets the grease. The nail that sticks out gets hammered. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. Better safe than sorry. Now what do I do??? -<>- At the end of a busy week, my 17-year-old daughter - eldest of my four kids -- asked me why I had had children. I could never imagine my life without them, I replied. "But, Mom," she said, "you don't have a life." [Reader's Digest.] -<>- A young man confided to his mother that he had proposed to his girlfriend and they were going to get married. "Whatsa dis?" screamed Mother. "Who's a-gonna love you like a Momma? Who's a gonna starch-a you socks? Who's a gonna make-a you lasagna?" "Please, Mom, calm down," pleaded the son. "Why are you talking like that? We aren't even Italian!" -<>- "Pour you a beer, Mr. Peterson?" "All right Woody, but stop me at one... make that one-thirty." -<>- Two fish are in a tank. One says to the other, "do you know how to drive this thing?" -<>- An old man in Phoenix calls his son in New York and says, "I hate to ruin your day, But I have to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing; forty-five years of misery is enough." "Pop, what are you talking about!" the son screams. "We can't stand the sight of each other any longer, " the old man said. "We're sick and tired of each other, and I'm sick of talking about this, so you call your sister in Chicago and tell her." And he hangs up. Frantic, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone, "Like heck they're getting a divorce," she shouts. "I'll take care of this." She calls Phoenix immediately, and screams at the old man, "You are NOT getting divorced! Don't do a single thing until we get there. DO YOU HEAR ME?" And she hangs up. The old man hangs up his phone and turns to his wife. "Okay," he says, "It worked. They're coming for Thanksgiving and paying their own way." -<>- I have five siblings, three sisters and two brothers. One night I was chatting with my Mom about how she had changed as a mother from the first child to the last. She told me she had mellowed a lot over the years: "When your oldest sister coughed or sneezed, I called the ambulance. When your youngest brother swallowed a dime, I just told him it was coming out of his allowance." -<>- Two blondes were walking down the road and the first blonde says, "Look at that dog with one eye!" The other blonde covers one of her eyes and says, "Where?" -<>- A little rural town had one of the highest birth rates in the country and this phenomenon attracted the attention of the sociologists at the state university. They wrote a grant proposal; got a huge chunk of money; moved to town; set up their computers; got squared away; and began designing their questionnaires and such. While the staff was busy getting ready for their big research effort, the project director decided to go to the local drugstore for a cup of coffee. He sat down at the counter, ordered his coffee, and while he was drinking it, he told the druggist what his purpose was in town, then asked him if he had any idea why the birth rate was so high. "Sure," said the druggist. "Every morning the six o'clock train comes through here and blows for the crossing. It wakes everybody up, and, well, it's too late to go back to sleep, and it's too early to get up." -<>- A group of expectant fathers sat nervously in the hall. A nurse beckoned to one of them and said, "Congratulations, you have a son!" Another man dropped his magazine, jumped up and cried, "Hey, what's the idea? I got here two hours before he did!" -<>- ________ ________ ` \ / ` ` \ / ` (____) (____) || .-"""""""""""""""""""""-. || <__> / \ <__> || |--LI-------------------LI--| || || (| === -|- === |) || || | | | || || |___________________________| || || `||"""""""""""""""""""""""||` || jgs _||_ ||-----------------------|| _||_ /____\ _||_ _||_ /____\ While making rounds, a doctor points out an X-ray to a group of medical students. "As you can see," she says, "the patient limps because his left fibula and tibia are radically arched. Michael, what would you do in a case like this?" "Well," ponders the student, "I suppose I'd limp too." ========================================================= >-->FUN Places To Net Visit :) High Tech Toys http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/techtoys.html Day and Night! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/dayandnight.html Here's Your Frog! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/frog.htm Animal Moms http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/animalmoms.html Amazing Dog Houses http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/doghouses2.html Paper Sculpture Art http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/paper.html There's Something About Mona! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/monalisa.html Amazing Street-Legal Airplane http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/transition.html Nigerian Dwarf Goat http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/goat.html World's Best Husbands http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/husbands.html -<>- >From Our Friend Melody :) Pumpkin Dreamboat Dessert http://tinyurl.com/ms82yfe Click To Give @ The Veterans Site http://theveteranssite.greatergood.com/clickToGive/vet/thank-you ROBOPLOW - YouTube http://www.youtube.com/embed/tPg1ZMiC9pA Archie Bunker at the VA http://videos2view.net/doctor-bunker.htm --- ...LOL! I get a kick outta him! Thanks Melody! -<>- >From Our Friend LouiseA :) Put to perfect music, the hilarious courtship dances of some of our bird friends will have you in stitches, as they display any number of bizarre moves to impress the opposite sex. http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=lMbDjNDD4cM Darcy Oake is a young magician that just flabbergasted everyone on the famous 'Britain's Got Talent' show, taking dove magic to whole new levels of excitement. I wonder, how many doves DOES he keep on his person? Whatever the answer is, this is one performance I enjoyed immensely, especially the big finish. http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=gO_KyTtJg10 Anyone who owns a cat knows how amazing they are. But why is it that cats seem to want to get our attention the most when we are trying to get some work done? Working from home when you own a cat https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=bDuLeXx2Gv0 --- ...LOL! Thanks LouiseA! My one cat is a long one who stretches up and uses his paw to tap me gently a couple times on top of my shoulder while I am typing and working on the computer. This normally startles me as I think there is a human in the room! He wants me to reach down and pet him of course! -<>- >From Our Friend PatDeE :) Three ways to load your stuff: http://www.chonday.com/Videos/bubikelo2#.U8aw81P6J0U.email http://www.chonday.com/Videos/biketruload2#.U8avtmaMqKk.email http://www.chonday.com/Videos/movetaiwn2#.U8awGf2e7Rg.email --- ...Oh Yeah! Thanks PatDeE! ======================================================= >-->Quotes & Thunkers: "Sometimes people ask me: 'Dave, what is the essence of parenthood?' I always answer: 'Lowering your standards.'" --Dave Barry "I was scared of the headmaster. He had incredible aim with an eraser. He could sit in front of the classroom, and if you were just leaning a little bit to the side as if to talk to the person next to you, he could hit you with an eraser upside your head from, like, 40 feet." - Actor KEVIN KLINE "I won't say our school was tough, but we had our own coroner. We used to write essays like: What I'm going to be if I grow up." -Lenny Bruce "My school days were the happiest days of my life; which should give you some indication of the misery I've endured over the past twenty-five years." -Paul Merton "Then the insurance man told me that the accident policy covered falling off the roof but not hitting the ground." --Tommy Cooper "Electricity can be dangerous. My nephew tried to stick a penny into a plug. Whoever said a penny doesn't go far didn't see him shoot across that floor. I told him he was grounded." -Tim Allen "I know that you believe that you understood what you think I said, but I am not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant." --Robert McCloskey, State Department spokesman >Updated FUN STUFF URLS - Oh Yeah :) Shangy! ------------------------------------------------------------------------ http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/urls.html FUN URLS ------------------------------------------------------------------------ -->FULL LENGTH - FREE On line AUDIO MP3 Christian Foundational Class http://www.truthortradition.com/modules.php?name=News&file=article&sid=61 NEW LIFE IN CHRIST! ------------------------------------------------------------------------ -->This is for all you who love food and DARE to make it at home Yep. You guessed it - Recipes. These are Tried and True, Yummy to the Tummy, good old fashioned home cooking recipes that are EASY to do :) Visit Shangy's Easy-Does-It Home Recipes: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/easy.html Home Recipes >Got A good Recipe? SHARE IT HERE: Share A Recipe ************************************************************************ >TO SUBSCRIBE: Visit Here This Weeks regular Shangy emails OR For the Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com ************************************************************************