Hamlets Cat And More ... :) Shangy! >Here are the details on our Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com To UnSubscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com Group home page: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ShangyFunList or Web Site: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/ShangyFunList.html Group email address: ShangyFunList@yahoogroups.com or email me here: bcrsystems@earthlink.net ================ "We are each of us angels with but one wing, and can only fly by embracing each other" -Luciano Decrescenzo ~ CALLING ALL CARING ANGELS ~ _..---.._ .' .-'''-. '. / .' _..._'. \ __ : : /`;' ) : : _,="`\ ,--''` ``'.; : |; ,-; : ; __..==""==.,_| `-, `; .\; / ^\ _,.="// '-,_.--._ '.(;_.'__/`_.-'`\ ,.--''`` _..=. `'--.// `` \ `--, '` `- |_\ '-. | `-._ _.;--`-..___,.-'` `'-...-_:',;`==,| \ _.--',=" / /"=;="=, _.' ,=".-'` .' /| ,=" _.--' .-' "=, : .' | ", `;._ .--'.' .-' .' . ; ,;;\_ . '._.'--'` -' / ,;;;._ '-._ .''.__.' `\_ .' '._ / '._ .(` jgs '._ ';./ `;` *~* WE NEED MORE 2009 CARING And SHARING Angels *~* >Do You Want To Be A Shangrala Angel? If you'd like to help and be counted as a 2009 Shangrala Angel, please visit the site and click on the donate button. A Secure PAYPAL page comes up. Any amount is greatly appreciated and needed! PLEASE Visit Shangrala to Help: http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/index.html OR If you'd rather send us a donation, Please MAIL it here: Elrhea Bigham 502 S. Harrison Van Wert, OH 45891 *~* THANK YOU! MAY GOD BLESS ALL OUR ANGELS MOST ABUNDANTLY! ================ >-->3 Hot Off The 'Shangy' Press :) Our Latest Greatest Red Hot one comes from a forward from our friend Jo Ann. Like our next one, it is very beautiful! Be sure to check out the video on the page! _____,,,\//,,\\,/, /-- --- --- ----- ///--- --- -- - ---- o////- ---- --- -- !!//o/--- -- -- o*) !///,~,,\\,\/,,/,//,, o!*!o'(\ /\ | ! o ",) \/\ /\ / \/\ o !o! !!| \/ \/ / ( * ( o!'; |\ ` / o o ! * !` | \ , \ o | o 'o| | : ` / * o !*!': |[| , / (o''| `| : , / ! *|'` \|, \ ' !o!':\ \` \ ( ('| '\ `--------/ !*!' '`---------/ o ! * ! ' ` / !o!' ' ` / ( !'( ' ` \ ////\\\,,\///,,,,\,/oO._* o !*!' ' \ ---- -- ------- - -oO*OoOo (o''| ' / -------- ------ 'oO*OoO!*|'o!! ' \ ------- -- - ---- --* oO*OoO *!'| ' ' / --- - ----- ---- - oO*OoO!!':o!' / - - ----- - -- - *--oO*OoOo!`_________/ \\\\\,,,\\,//////,\,,\\\/,,,\,,ejm/AMC Niagara Falls Frozen! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/niagarafalls.html This next one comes from a forward from our friend Viv. It is one that will leave you dazed, it is so beautiful! Check it out here... \| //_ |y//| j `.| /\ \ / ;--'\ / ; :=\=\ / ; : =\=\ / ; : =\=\ /\ ; : .'\`.\ /`\\ ;/ \ `\ / /\`._.'/ \ \ `-/_ `---'| _\-' hjw `-.___|__.-' Northern Lights Over Teepees http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/teepees.html Our last hottie is from two forwards from our friend Sandi. We can never get enough of our sweet animal pictures and these from Sandi are no exception! Simply adorable for all our cat lovers PLUS at the end is an amazing YouTube video of a deer rescue. It took some innovation and quick thinking but the people figured out the perfect solution to freeing this little critter from the dangerously thin ice. Check it all out here... (`,---.') (\ (w,_,w) )) -=>_Y_<=- _,;' /`"'\.-'.' .' `<' | ; ; | |`, , | \ ;`; / pb ||,|| /|| ||\ (,|( )|,) (,,Y,,) Look Who's Talking 3! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/talking3.html --- ...Absolutely Wonderful Ladies! Thank You All So Much!! ======================================================== >-->From TheFunnyBone: _, // /)/) (\(\ || / ..\ ).. \ \\.----' ,_Y/ \Y_, '-. \ ( Map of the Cat's Brain ) '. l \_/ | | \/ \ | /`/| // \\ |\_ |_ jgs \_)_)\_)) ((_/(__/_,'. (,----' ` .--------------------+--------------------------+-----------. | Obsession with | Mysterious Adoration of | Barf Gland| | Imaginary Insects | just one spot on the bed | | +-------------+------+--------+-----------------+-----------+ | Search and | Inexorable | Short Circuit | | | Destroy | fear of | that makes purr-| Licking | | lobe for | Vacuum | ing kitty an | Gland | | Expensive | Cleaners | arm-shredding +-----------+ | Imported +---------------+ Maniac in Two | Total | | Textiles, | Can Opener | seconds | drive to | | Ceramics | sonar +-----------------+ be where | +-------------+---------------+ Asthmatic | they are | | Shedding on | * | person locator | forbidden | | vacuumed freshly +----------+-----------------+ to go | | surfaces cortex | Infatuation with people +-----------+ +------------------| who hate cats | Inability | | hatred of dogs +----------------------------| to get | '------------------' | along with| | new cat | * Commitment Spot (gets larger when can-opener '-----------' sonar is activated) (there should be an arrow between licking and barfing) =================================================================== +---------- Bizarre Friday the 13th Myths ----------+ 1. Fear of Friday the 13th is called “Paraskavedekatriaphobia”, derived from three Greek words. 2. Any month that begins on a Sunday will contain a Friday the 13th, and there is at least one Friday the 13th in every calendar year. 3. Few people are prepared to marry on Friday the 13th. But in 1913 a pastor in Middletown, New Jersey, decrying the superstition, offered to marry couples free on that date. 4. Rossini, the composer, regarded Friday as an unlucky day and 13 as an unlucky number. He died on Friday November 13, 1868. 5. One recent survey conducted in Asheville, North Carolina, claimed that 17 million to 21 million people in the United States are affected by Friday the 13th, avoiding taking flights or, in some cases, even getting out of bed. 6. On Friday October 13 1307, officers of King Philip IV of France carried out mass arrests in a well-coordinated dawn raid that left several thousand Templars – knights, sergeants, priests, and serving brethren – in chains, charged with heresy, blasphemy, various obscenities, and homosexual practices. 7. One theory is that the Friday the 13th superstitions originated in a Norse myth about 12 gods having a feast in Valhalla. The mischievous Loki crashed the party as an uninvited 13th guest and arranged for Hod, the blind god of darkness, to shoot Baldur, the god of joy and gladness, with a mistletoe-tipped arrow. Baldur was killed and the Earth was plunged into darkness and mourning as a result. 8. Researchers in 1993 found that on Friday the 13th fewer people were driving than normal, because of superstition, yet there were more transport accidents even though there were fewer vehicles on the road. 9. One view is that the Friday the 13th taboo stems directly from the Bible. Thirteen ate at The Last Supper and so that number was seen as unlucky; and Christ was crucified on a Friday, so that day was regarded as fatal. 10. In 1908, a senator from Oklahoma defied superstition by introducing 13 bills on Friday the 13th. [From metro.co.uk] ========================================================== >-->From Our Friend Sandi :) _____ _.'_____`._ .'.-' 12 `-.`. /,' 11 1 `.\ // 10 / 2 \\ ;; / :: || 9 ----O 3 || :: ;; \\ 8 4 // \`. 7 5 ,'/ '.`-.__6__.-'.' ((-._____.-)) _)) ((_ '--'SSt '--' >It's a Pittance of Time Please take the 2 minutes...it could have been us... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_6djYPJBIK4 --- ...Awesome! I loved this! Thanks Sandi! -<>- .-""""-._.'| / '.| | / | / | -= | /| ( | |/`< ) ) ( ; -=| _| ) \ \ / ____ /) '._ _.-""-.< .' `\/) / / \ / _ .'`/| _ / | '-._( __\ (__/_/=, ( \| \ -=/ /--;==========` ._,;'\==='-,..__/__/__.' `'--/,/ || ' \ / | / || ' \ \/ . || ; jgs / / || | | . || | / '=------| / ' ; ; ;| `-.___.___.___.___._/ >Thanksgiving from Military... SEND TO YOUR FRIENDS, SO THEY CAN SEND IT ON BEFORE THANKSGIVING... Click your mouse here: Thanksgiving http://www.cpmsglife2.org/MSG/Pres/td/td1.html --- ...Very Sweet and Inspiring! Thank You Sandi! -<>- >The Wongs Su Wong marries Lee Wong. The next year, the Wongs have a new baby. The nurse brings over a lovely, healthy, bouncy, but definitely a Caucasian, WHITE baby boy. 'Congratulations,' says the nurse to the new parents. 'Well Mr. Wong, what will you and Mrs. Wong name the baby?' The puzzled father looks at his new baby boy and says, 'Well, two Wong's don't make a white, so I think we will name him... Are you ready for this? Check it out here... The Wongs ... http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ShangyFunList/files/ You know you laughed and are going to send this on!!! --- ...Oh Brother!! TeeHee! Thanks Sandi! -<>- . | \/| (\ _ ) )|/| (/ _----. /.'.' .-._________.. .' @ _\ .' '.._______. '. / (_| .') '._____. / '-/ | _.' '.______ ( ) ) \ '..____ '._ ) ) .' __.--\ , , // (( '.' mrf| \/ (_.'( ' \ .' \ ( \ '. \ \ '.) '-'-' >Parrots!! View this ET-AHEM!! Here... Parrots http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ShangyFunList/files/ --- ...TeeHee! A Good One! Thanks sandi! -<>- .---------------. / oLo \ O/_____/________/____\O /__________+__________\ / (#############) \ |[**](#############)[**]| \_______________________/ |_""__|_,-----,_|__""_| | | '-----' | | APC'97 '-' '-' >Woman Drivers! This morning on the Interstate, I looked over to my left and there was a Woman In a brand new Cadillac doing 65 mph With her face up next to her rear view mirror putting on her eyeliner. I looked away for a couple seconds And when I looked back she was Halfway over in my lane, Still working on that makeup. As a man, I don't scare easily. But she scared me so much; I dropped My electric shaver, Which knocked The donut Out of my other hand! In all the confusion of trying To straighten out the car Using my knees against The steering wheel, It knocked My Cell Phone Away from my ear Which fell Into the coffee Between my legs! Splashed, And burned Big Jim and the Twins, Ruined the dang phone, Soaked my trousers, And disconnected an Important call. Darn women drivers!!! --- ...LOL! What a funny! Thanks Sandi! -<>- | | | _ | | <_> | | | | | `-._ | |`-._| | | _________________________________|____ `-._ `-._ | `-._ `-._ | kat `-._ `-._ * WARNING: The Following Is Only For Those For The BUCKS - You Know Who You Are! - Michigan Folks Please Skip This - >The Creation of OHIO ... GO BUCKS! Here we go again GO BUCKS >The Creation of OHIO ... GO BUCKS! Once upon a time in the Kingdom of Heaven, God was missing for six days. Eventually, Michael the archangel found him resting on the seventh day. He inquired of God, "Where have you been?" God sighed a deep sigh of satisfaction and proudly pointed downwards through the clouds, "Michael, look what I've made." Michael looked puzzled and said, "What is it?" "It's a planet," replied God, "and I've put LIFE on it. I'm going to call it Earth and it's going to be a great place of balance." "Balance???" inquired Michael, still confused. God explained, pointing to different parts of earth, "For example, northern Europe will be a place of great opportunity and wealth while southern Europe is going to be poor; the Middle East will be a hot spot. Over here I've placed a continent of white people and over there is a continent of black people," God continued, pointing to different countries. "This one will be extremely hot and arid while this one will be very cold and covered in ice." The Archangel, while impressed by God's work, pointed to some people standing around with their hands above their head, "What's up with that?" [PICTURES---Pictures Viewed HERE---] Ohio 1 - Ohio 2 - Ohio 3 - Ohio 4 http://tinyurl.com/qy8pjy "Ah," said God, "They are from Ohio, the most glorious place on earth. There are beautiful lakes, rivers, sunsets and rolling hills. The people from Ohio are modest, intelligent and humorous. They can be found traveling all around the world. They are sociable, hard working and high achieving. They will be known throughout the world as diplomats and carriers of peace and good will." Michael gasped in wonder, but then proclaimed, "What about balance, God? You said there would be balance ?!?!?!?" God replied wisely, "Wait until you see the idiots I'm putting in Michigan ! --- ...Oh My! You are Bad Sandi! LOL! Thanks! =============================================================== >-->From Both Our Friends Jo ann And Viv :) _,.,,_ ,~>v>><@()=, ->@>(_)<>>v<<. ,>>o>>@<<, `<<(_)<` '>>()>v, =<>@>~ <@<= '>v(/`"")_(""'\>\___/j\___/v<` ''>v/;|;`-.<` hjw / |\ `. /,'\| \ .--` \| >Twas The Month Before Christmas... *Twas the month before Christmas* *When all through our land,* *Not a Christian was praying* *Nor taking a stand.* *See the PC Police had taken away,* *The reason for Christmas - no one could say.* *The children were told by their schools not to sing,* *About Shepherds and Wise Men and Angels and things.* *It might hurt people's feelings, the teachers would say* *December 25th is just a ' Holiday '.* *Yet the shoppers were ready with cash, checks and credit* *Pushing folks down to the floor just to get it!* *CDs from Madonna, an X BOX, an I-pod* *Something was changing, something quite odd! * *Retailers promoted Ramadan and Kwanzaa* *In hopes to sell books by Franken & Fonda.* *As Targets were hanging their trees upside down* *At Lowe's the word Christmas - was no where to be found..* *At K-Mart and Staples and Penny's and Sears* *You won't hear the word Christmas; it won't touch your ears.* *Inclusive, sensitive, Di-ver-si-ty* *Are words that were used to intimidate me.* *Now Daschle, Now Darden, Now Sharpton, Wolf Blitzen* *On Boxer, on Rather, on Kerry, on Clinton!* *At the top of the Senate, there arose such a clatter* *To eliminate Jesus, in all public matter.* *And we spoke not a word, as they took away our faith* *Forbidden to speak of salvation and grace* *The true Gift of Christmas was exchanged and discarded* *The reason for the season, stopped before it started.* *So as you celebrate 'Winter Break' under your 'Dream Treee'* *Sipping your Starbucks, listen to me.* *Choose your words carefully, choose what you say* *Shout MERRY CHRISTMAS,not Happy Holiday!* Please, all Christians join together and wish everyone you meet during the holidays a MERRY CHRISTMAS Christ is The Reason for the Christ-mas Season! If you agree please forward, if not, simply delete. --- ...so true! I love the reworked poem! Thanks Jo Ann and Viv! ================================================================ >-->From Our Friend Viv :) ,--. //^\\\ ,;;;, . ((-_-))) (-_- ; /_\ )))((( >..'. .:. .--. |SSt| ((_._ ) /. .| :-_-; /-_-)) _))A ((_//| S || ,`-'. ))-(( `( )`' |___|),;, C \\_/,`I )) \ / | | |`' |___(/-'|___() ,-. )( | | | | | | | | | (-_-) _____ /__\ |_|_| |_|_| |_|_| (\I/\.__|A|R|T| `'' `-'-' `-'-' `-'-' `'-`' `o' `o' >HOW TO STAY YOUNG: 1. Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and height. Let the doctors worry about them. That is why you pay 'them' 2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down. 3. Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever. Never let the brain idle. 'An idle mind is the devil's workshop.' And the devil's name is Alzheimer's. 4. Enjoy the simple things. 5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath. 6. The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person, who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be ALIVE while you are alive. 7. Surround yourself with what you love , whether it's family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge. 8. Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help. 9. Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, even to the next county; to a foreign country but NOT to where the guilt is. 10. Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity. AND ALWAYS REMEMBER : Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away. And if you don't send this to at least 8 people - who cares? But do share this with someone. We all need to live life to its fullest each day!! Worry about nothing, pray about everything!!! --- ...Great advise! Thanks Viv! -<>- .-. o \ .-. .----.' \ .'o) / `. o / | \_) /-. '_.` \ \ `. | \ Look Out - I Think I May | \ | .--/`-. / / .'.-/`-. `. .\| Have Ta SNEEZE! /.' /`._ `- '-. ____(|__/`-..`- '-._ \ |`------.'-._ ` ||\ \ || # /-. ` / || \| || #/ `--' / /_::_|)__ `|____|-._.-` / ||`--------` \-.___.` | / || # | \ | | || # # | /`.___.'\ |.`|________| | /`.__.'|'.` __/ \ __/ \ /__.-.) /__.-.) LGB >In Case Of H1N1 Emergency... In case we run out of masks during the H1N1 flu season, Here is a ‘homemade’ mask you can make yourself. It is even compatible with the wearing of glasses! One thing though......... MAKE SURE YOUR MASK IS CLEAN!!!!!!!! H1N1 Mask http://tinyurl.com/ya4frsn --- ...Oh No!!!! LOL! Thanks Viv! -<>- >[POLITICS - Viv Reports - You Decide ]... :) >Obama Admits He Is A Muslim I know a lot of you may not believe everything on YouTube... but in the voice of the president? YouTube - Obama Admits He Is A Muslim#t Be sure and watch ASAP -- no telling how soon it may be taken down, http://www.youtube.com/watch_popup?v=tCAffMSWSzY#t=28 Here also is some insight into the background of the "alleged" killer at FT Hood, TX. Watch. You won't regret it. Fort Hood suspect Nidal Malik Hasan seemed 'cool, calm, religious' - CNN.com http://www.cnn.com/2009/CRIME/11/06/fort.hood.suspect/index.html?ere -<>- >INTERNMENT CAMPS DOES CIVIL UNREST MEAN THOSE WHO DISAGREE? FEMA CONCENTRATION CAMPS: Locations and Executive Orders http://www.apfn.org/apfn/camps1.htm FEMA's 911 Concentration CIt is not a pretty site to see. http://freedomfiles.org/war/fema.htm Preparing for Civil Unrest in America Legislation to Establish Internment Camps on US Military Bases http://www.globalresearch.ca/index.php?context=va&aid=12793 ==================================================================== >-->In The Worldly News: [Politics] >From GrassFire: Grassfire has just learned that unprecedented power will be awarded to the president in a climate "carbon level" emergency! Such a move could potentially shut down American businesses and cost untold numbers of jobs and produce no environmental benefit. Senator John Barrasso (R-WY), an outspoken critic of the Cap and Trade legislation warns, “Emergency powers are granted to the President in times of natural disaster, war or after events like the 9/11 attacks. " President should not have the power to pick winners and losers in our already struggling economy." ++Obama's unprecedented presidential power As if the Federal Government doesn't have their hands in too much already what with high-jacking the banking, auto, healthcare, insurance and student loan industries, now they are plotting a climate take over! Folks, as citizens we cannot allow this kind of aggressive gutting of our country and its people to go unchallenged. Please sign and forward this message to 25-30 friends, urging them to take immediate action by signing our petition and taking a stand against unprecedented government control and skyrocketing taxes, by clicking here: http://www.grassfire.net/r.asp?u=23030&PID=16216415 I fully anticipate a vigorous Cap and Trade push, and am calling on you to help me rally and mobilize 100,000 grassroots citizens over the next ten days--citizens who... ...refuse to support any attempts to "fix" our environment without measureable results! ...object to another stifling tax--as much as $3,100 per family annually. ...will stand against self-serving lawmakers who think nothing of passing along an overpriced, overreaching ineffective legislation while ignoring the effects on American households and businesses! ...resist giving the President supreme power over climate control! I'm not standing for it, and I'm trusting you won't either. Thank you in advance for standing with me against this oppressive Cap and Trade legislation. Steve Elliott President, Grassfire.org -<>- >From BizarreNews: -– Police say homeowner set trap for burglar ——— SALT LAKE CITY – A Salt Lake City man victimized by one burglar set a trap that helped nab a suspect in an attempted break-in, police say. Police Lt. Craig Gleason said the unidentified homeowner, who lost jewelry and a laptop during a previous burglary, created a makeshift alarm device that alerted him a would-be burglar was attempting to enter his home Tuesday, The Salt Lake Tribune reported Thursday. Gleason said hearing the alarm, the homeowner chased a 50-year-old suspect and, thanks to the help of three other men, captured him. Gleason said in addition to his homemade alarm system, the homeowner also used information from police officers to lure in the unidentified suspect. “As it turns out, in the course of investigating the first burglary, the officers kind of mentioned to the homeowner that if you leave all your newspapers in the driveway and mail in the mailbox, that can make you a target for burglars,” he told the Tribune. “This homeowner, instead of removing the papers and mail, left the stuff there — specifically with the intent of luring the burglar back in.” -– Police: 911 caller made up potato attack ——— LARGO, Fla. – Police in Florida said they arrested a man who called 911 and falsely reported a man was “smashing potatoes” over a woman’s head. Largo police said Robert Turley, 51, called 911 three times Tuesday night, first saying a man armed with a knife was chasing a woman and then about 45 minutes later claiming the man was “smashing potatoes” over the woman’s head, the St. Petersburg (Fla.) Times reported Thursday. The man called a third time to claim the man was punching the woman in the face. Police found Turley, who was allegedly intoxicated, hiding in his neighbor’s yard, and he admitted to making up the story because he was angry with his roommates, a man and a woman, the report said. He was charged with false report of a crime and taken to the Pinellas County Jail in lieu of $250 bail. Turley has been arrested 12 times since 1991 and has served jail time for crimes including possession of drug paraphernalia, the newspaper said. ============================================================= >-->From our Friend Jo Ann :) _,._ __.' _) <_,)'.-"a\ /' ( \ _.-----..,-' (`"--^ // | (| `; , | \ ;.----/ ,/ ) // / | |\ \ jgs \ \\`\ | |/ / \ \\ \ | |\/ Lamb Of God http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/poems/lamb.html --- ...Thank You Jo Ann For The Sweet Reminder! -<>- __ /,- ||) Helloooooooooo \\_, ) `--' ejm Free Hearing Test http://freehearingtest.info/ --- ...We all need to check now and then! Thanks Jo Ann! -<>- >Two Horses _,--''--,_ _,-'~~'-, ( '' {}{} }{ {}{} }{| {}{} }{}( ) ,__ , \ {}{} {}{) / \' ) '\ / ~/\ (\/) {}{/ / \ | | /| / \ }{ }{( ) ( ) ( ) ( ) | |} {}{\\ \\ (/ || | u|{ }{}{\\ \\ || || \ | |\ |\ |\ |\ (\o -- '' -'-' ~` "" ~` ~`' ~` '"' "' -- '' -'-' miK There is a field, with two horses in it. From a distance, each horse looks like any other horse. But if you stop your car, or are walking by, you will notice something quite amazing. Looking into the eyes of one horse will disclose that he is blind. His owner has chosen not to have him put down, but has made a good home for him. This alone is amazing. If you stand nearby and listen, you will hear the sound of a bell. Looking around for the source of the sound, you will see that it comes from the smaller horse in the field. Attached to the horse's halter is a small bell. It lets the blind friend know where the other horse is, so he can follow. As you stand and watch these two horses, you'll see that the horse with the bell is always checking on the blind horse, and that the blind horse will listen for the bell and then slowly walk to where the other horse is, trusting that he will not be led astray. When the horse with the bell returns to the shelter of the barn each evening, it stops occasionally and looks back, making sure that the blind friend isn't too far behind to hear the bell. Like the owner of these two horses, God does not throw us away just because we are not perfect or because we have problems or challenges. He watches over us and even brings others into our lives to help us when we are in need. Sometimes we are the blind horse being guided by the little ringing bell of those who God places in our lives. Other times we are the guide horse, helping others to find their way.... Good friends are like that... you may not always see them, but you know they are always there. And remember...be kinder than necessary - everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle. Live simply, Love generously, Care deeply, Speak kindly..... Leave the rest to God... --- ...Aww, a sweet one! Thanks Jo Ann! ======================================================= >-->From CleanLaffs: .--. {\ / q {\ { `\ \ (-(~` { '.{`\ \ \ ) {'-{ ' \ .-""'-. \ \ {._{'.' \/ '.) \ {_.{. {` | {._{ ' { ;'-=-. | {-.{.' { ';-=-.` / {._.{.; '-=- .' {_.-' `'.__ _,-' jgs |||` .='==, After all the help I received on my turkey weekend, I felt compelled to pass some of it along when I read this note from a reader... "Hey Joe! I'm attempting my first turkey this year, I could use some gravy & stuffing recipes, how about passing some along?" --Charlene Smith Actually, Charlene, the gravy turned out to be quicker and easier than I expected. The first thing is to pour off several cups of juice from the turkey and let the fat separate. Then, I diced up a small onion very fine, the finer the better in this circum- stance. Finally, I dissolved a heaping tablespoon of flour in a cup of cold water. With these components, plus a can of chicken broth, you are ready to make your gravy. First, lightly brown the onions in a large pan with several tablespoons of turkey fat. The fat will add the flavor. When the onions are slightly brown (don't burn 'em, mind you!) add the chicken broth. Bring this up to a very low simmer. Once you get some bubbles coming up start slowly adding the flour solution while whisking constantly until the desired consistency is reached. A very little salt and some black pepper and you have a delicious gravy. There are several options to these directions: * Split your chicken broth with turkey juice to add more turkey flavor. * Add a half a can of mushroom slices if you're into that. * If you made your turkey in a roasting pan, you can pre- pare the whole thing in that by placing the pan right on the stove. By scraping the bottom of the pan while you're stirring the tasty bits and pieces get mixed into the gravy. Just make sure you pour off ALL the juice and fat before you begin this method. -<>- My husband is wonderful with our baby daughter, but often he turns to me for advice. Recently, I was in the shower when he poked his head in to ask, "What should I feed Lily for lunch?" "That's up to you," I replied. "There's all kinds of food. Why don't you pretend I'm not at home?" A few minutes later, my cell phone rang. I answered it to hear my husband asking, "Yeah, hi, Honey. Uh...what should I feed Lily for lunch?" -<>- My friend's preparations for a visit from her children in- cluded a trip to the bank. Waiting in line at the teller's window, she lamented to the middle-aged man behind her, "My children are in their 20s, and I'm still giving them money. When does it end?" "I'm not sure I'm the one to ask," the man said while glancing uncomfortably at a paper in his hand, "I'm here to deposit a check from my mother." -<>- "Armstrong," the boss bellowed, "I happen to know that the reason you didn't come to work yesterday was that you were out playing golf! What do you have to say for yourself?" "That's a rotten lie!" Armstrong protested. "And I have the fish to prove it!" -<>- . , * , ` *~.|,~* ' ' ,~*~~* ` _ ,* / \`* ' // ,* ; \,O. // ,(:::)=// ( `~(###) %---'`"y \ / \ / __)(__ hjw '------` Five years after my wife, Bridgid, and I were married, we received our final wedding gift -- an ice-cream maker. In an attempt to cover procrastination with humor, the friend who sent it included a note: "I wanted to make sure the marriage would last." Bridgid wasn’t amused, but she thought the present deserved a thank-you note anyway, which she dutifully sent five years later. Her note read: "I wanted to be sure the ice-cream maker would last." [Thanks to Reader's Digest.] -<>- Bill and his fiancee Mary met with the to discuss their marriage vows. "Pastor," said Mary, "I wonder if we could make a change in the wording of our ceremony." "Yes, Mary," replied the pastor, "it is sometimes done. What do you have in mind?" "Well," said Mary, "I'd like to alter the 'until death do us part' section to read, 'Substantial penalty for early withdrawal.'" -<>- ,,_ {'%|=, )< < ,\ )( | | )` |( |/ pb =' Clean Laffs Joe took a girl out on their first date. When they pulled off into a secluded area, the girl said, "My mother told me to say no to everything." "Well," Joe said, "do you mind if I put my arm around you?" "No," the girl replied. "Do you mind if I put my other hand on your knee?" "N-n-no," the girl replied. "You know," Joe said, "We're going to have a lot of fun if you're serious about this." ============================================================= >-->From JokeCentral: _|_ | .-'''''-. .-' '-. .-' :::::_::::: '-. ___/ ==:...:::-:::...:== \___ /_____________________________\ ':'-._________________________.-'_ ':::\ @-,`-[-][-^-][-]-`,-@ / _| |_ '::| .-------------------. ||_ @ _| ::|=|* ___ _ ___ *|=|'.| | ':| |' ))_) )) ))_) '| |::.^| _:|=|' ((`\ (( (( '|=|::::::. _| || |' _ '| |:::::::. |_ |=|'1634 _( )_ 1789'|=|':::::. | || |' ( (_ ~ _) ) '| | ':::' |^||=|* ) (_) ( *|=| '::' | '-------------------' .::::' |_____________________.::::::' .'___________________.::::::'' |_______________.::::'':::''' .'_____________.::::::''::::'' .:::'''' LGB .'::::' .:::::''':. .:::::' Here are some funny epitaphs from real tombstones: On the grave of Ezekial Aikle in East Dalhousie Cemetery, Nova Scotia: Here lies Ezekial Aikle Age 102 The Good Die Young. In a London, England cemetery: Ann Mann Here lies Ann Mann, Who lived an old maid But died an old Mann. Dec. 8, 1767 In a Ribbesford, England, cemetery: Anna Wallace The children of Israel wanted bread And the Lord sent them manna, Old clerk Wallace wanted a wife, And the Devil sent him Anna. Playing with names in a Ruidoso, New Mexico, cemetery: Here lies Johnny Yeast Pardon me For not rising. Memory of an accident in a Uniontown, Pennsylvania cemetery: Here lies the body of Jonathan Blake Stepped on the gas Instead of the brake. In a Silver City, Nevada, cemetery: Here lays Butch, We planted him raw. He was quick on the trigger, But slow on the draw. A widow wrote this epitaph in a Vermont cemetery: Sacred to the memory of my husband John Barnes who died January 3, 1803 His comely young widow, aged 23, has many qualifications of a good wife, and yearns to be comforted. A lawyer's epitaph in England: Sir John Strange Here lies an honest lawyer, And that is Strange. Someone determined to be anonymous in Stowe, Vermont: I was somebody. Who, is no business Of yours. Lester Moore was a Wells, Fargo Co. station agent for Naco, Arizona in the cowboy days of the 1880's. He's buried in the Boot Hill Cemetery in Tombstone, Arizona: Here lies Lester Moore Four slugs from a .44 No Les No More. In a Georgia cemetery: "I told you I was sick!" John Penny's epitaph in the Wimborne, England, cemetery: Reader if cash thou art In want of any Dig 4 feet deep And thou wilt find a Penny. On Margaret Daniels' grave at Hollywood Cemetery Richmond, Virginia: She always said her feet were killing her but nobody believed her. In a cemetery in Hartscombe, England: On the 22nd of June - Jonathan Fiddle - Went out of tune. Anna Hopewell's grave in Enosburg Falls, Vermont has an epitaph that sounds like something from a Three Stooges movie: Here lies the body of our Anna Done to death by a banana It wasn't the fruit that laid her low But the skin of the thing that made her go. More fun with names with Owen Moore in Battersea, London, England: Gone away Owin' more Than he could pay. Someone in Winslow, Maine didn't like Mr. Wood: In Memory of Beza Wood Departed this life Nov. 2, 1837 Aged 45 yrs. Here lies one Wood Enclosed in wood One Wood Within another. The outer wood Is very good: We cannot praise The other. On a grave from the 1880's in Nantucket, Massachusetts: Under the sod and under the trees Lies the body of Jonathan Pease. He is not here, there's only the pod: Pease shelled out and went to God. The grave of Ellen Shannon in Girard, Pennsylvania is almost a consumer tip: Who was fatally burned March 21, 1870 by the explosion of a lamp filled with "R.E. Danforth's Non-Explosive Burning Fluid" Oops! Harry Edsel Smith of Albany, New York: Born 1903--Died 1942 Looked up the elevator shaft to see if the car was on the way down. It was. In a Thurmont, Maryland, cemetery: Here lies an Atheist All dressed u And no place to go. --- _ /) mo / ) |/)\) /\_ \__|= ( ) __)(__ _____/ \\_____ | _ ___ _ || | | \ | | \ || | | | | | | || | |_/ | |_/ || | | \ | | || | | \ | | || | | \. _|_. | . || | || | name goes here || | || * | * ** * ** |** ** \))ejm97/.,(//,,..,,\||(,,.,\\,.((// ...View More Funny Ones Here... http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/tombstones.html -<>- Golf A foursome of senior golfers hit the course with waning enthusiasm for the sport. "These hills re getting steeper as the years go by," one complained. "These fairways seem to be getting longer too," wheezed a second. "And somehow, the sand traps seem to be bigger than I remember 'em too," said the third. Hearing just about enough from his buddies, the oldest, and the wisest of the foursome at 87-years-old, piped up and said, "Oh my friends, just be thankful we're still on THIS side of the grass!" -<>- Surely, Goodness and Mercy ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A pastor was giving a lesson to a group of children on the 23rd Psalm. He noticed that one of the little boys seemed disquieted by the phrase "Surely, goodness and mercy will follow me all the days of my life..." "What's wrong with that, Johnny?" the pastor asked. "Well," answered Johnny, "I understand about having goodness and mercy, for God is good. But I'm not sure I'd like Shirley following me around all the time." Posted From [Bill's Punch Line] -<>- >Corporate Decisions There was a boss who was told by his boss that he had to get rid of at least one employee. So he narrowed the decision to one of two new employees, Jack or Mary. He then decided to speak to each one privately, and let their reactions help guide his decision. So he called in Jack, explained the situation and, of course, Jack said he didn't want to lose his job, but he understood the boss's situation. Then he called in Mary, and said, 'Mary, I've got a problem; By the end of the day, I've got to lay you or Jack off...' And Mary says, 'Then you're gonna have to jack off, buster, I've got a headache!' -<>- >A Blonde's Diet A blonde is terribly overweight, so her doctor put her on a diet. "I want you to eat regularly for 2 days, then skip a day, and repeat this procedure for 2 weeks. The next time I see you, you'll have lost at least 5 pounds." When the blonde returned, she shocked the doctor by losing nearly 20 pounds. "Why, that's amazing!" the doctor said, "Did you follow my instructions?" The blonde nodded, "I'll tell you though, I thought I was going to drop dead that third day." "From hunger, you mean?" asked the doctor. "No, from skipping." -<>- _____ _____ ,ad8PPPP88b, ,d88PPPP8ba, d8P" "Y8b, ,d8P" "Y8b dP' "8a8" `Yd 8( " )8 I8 8I Yb, ,dP "8a, ,a8" "8a, ,a8" "Yba adP" `Y8a a8P' `88, ,88' "8b d8" Normand "8b d8" Veilleux `888' " Forgive Is your heart heavy laden with anger; are you wounded by the pierce of a word that was spoken with thought unregarded; are you hurt by the things that you heard? Do the sun and its rays all elude you; do your eyes never light in a smile? Are you plagued with a need to get even; are your feelings as bitter as bile? Then it's time to let go of emotions that afflict your mind and your soul, and it's time to start mending some fences, with forgiveness your ultimate goal. You may think that it's hard to accomplish, that your pride is too great to give in, but the one who hangs on to resentment is the one who never will win. For the person who is the big winner and the person who's learned how to live is not one who harbors ill feelings but the one who has learned to forgive. © 2000 Ruth Gillis mailto:ruthgill@worldnet.att.net First published in the April 2000 issue of: The Inspirational Poet. -<>- * * __ * ,db' * * ,d8/ * * * 888 `db\ * * `o`_ ** * * * _ * * / ) * (\__/) * ( ( * ,-.,-.,) (.,-.,-.,-.) ).,-.,-. | @| ={ }= | @| / / | @|o | _j__j__j_) `-------/ /__j__j__j_ ________( /___________ | | @| \ || o|O | @| |o | |,'\ , ,'"| | | | hjw vV\|/vV|`-'\ ,---\ | \Vv\hjwVv\//v _) ) `. \ / (__/ ) ) (_/ >Hamlet's Cat's Soliloquy To go outside, and there perchance to stay Or to remain within: that is the question: Whether 'tis better for a cat to suffer The cuffs and buffets of inclement weather That Nature rains on those who roam abroad, Or take a nap upon a scrap of carpet, /\____/\ __ .' """" `,-' `--.__ __,- : - - ; " :: `-. -.__ ,-sssss `._ `' _,'" ,'~~~::`.sssss-. |ssssss ,' ,_`--'_ __,' :: ` `.ssssss| |sssssss `-._____~ `,,'_______,---_;; ssssss| |ssssssssss `--'~{__ ____ ,'ssssss| `-ssssssssssssssssss ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ssss.-' `---.sssssssssssssssssssss.---' Susie Oviatt And so by dozing melt the solid hours That clog the clock's bright gears with sullen time And stall the dinner bell. To sit, to stare Outdoors, and by a stare to seem to state A wish to venture forth without delay, Then when the portal's opened up, to stand As if transfixed by doubt. To prowl; to sleep; To choose not knowing when we may once more Our readmittance gain: aye, there's the hairball; For if a paw were shaped to turn a knob, Or work a lock or slip a window-catch, And going out and coming in were made As simple as the breaking of a bowl, What cat would bear the household's petty plagues, _.---. |\---/| / ) ca| ------------; |-/ /|foo|--- ) (' / `---' ===========( ,'========== || _ | | || o/ ) | | o || ( ( / ; || \ `._/ / || `._ /| || |\ _/|| __||_____.' ) |__||____________ ________\ | |_________________ \ \ `-. `-`---' hjw The cook's well-practiced kicks, the butler's broom, The infant's careless pokes, the tickled ears, The trampled tail, and all the daily shocks That fur is heir to, when, of his own free will, He might his exodus or entrance make With a mere mitten? Who would spaniels fear, Or strays trespassing from a neighbor's yard, But that the dread of our unheeded cries And scratches at a barricaded door No claw can open up, dispels our nerve And makes us rather bear our humans' faults Than run away to unguessed miseries? Thus caution doth make house cats of us all; _..---...,""-._ ,/}/) .'' , ``..'(/-< / _ { ) \ ; _ `. `. < a( ,' ( \ ) `. \ __.._ .: y ( <\_-) )'-.____...\ `._ //-' `. `-' /-._))) `-._))) `...' hjw And thus the bristling hair of resolution Is softened up with the pale brush of thought, And since our choices hinge on weighty things, We pause upon the threshold of decision. -shakespaw -<>- _ / } /'.\ _/ ) (`- ( ,) |/ /| ' ` Elb >Supermodel Wisdom ON COURAGE "They were doing a full back shot of me in a swimsuit and I thought, Oh my God, I have to be so brave. See, every woman hates herself from behind." -- Cindy Crawford ON SELF-KNOWLEDGE "Everywhere I went, my cleavage followed. But I learned I am not my cleavage." -- Carole Mallory ON POVERTY "Everyone should have enough money to get plastic surgery." -- Beverly Johnson ON FATE "I wish my butt did not go sideways, but I guess I have to face that." -- Christie Brinkley ON PSYCHOLOGY "I loved making 'Rising Sun'. I got into the psychology of why she liked to get strangled and tied up in plastic bags. It has to do with low self-worth." -- Tatjana Patitz ON ARRIVING "Because modeling is lucrative, I'm able to save up and be more particular about the acting roles I take." -- Kathy Ireland, star of 'Alien From L.A.' and 'Danger Island' ON INNER STRENGTH "I love the confidence that makeup gives me." -- Tyra Banks ON DEATH "Richard doesn't really like me to kill bugs, but sometimes I can't help it." -- Cindy Crawford ON INTRODUCTIONS "I think most people are curious about what it would be like to be able to meet yourself -- it's eerie." -- Christy Turlington ON COURTSHIP "The soundtrack to 'Indecent Exposure' is a romantic mix of music that I know most women love to hear, so I never keep it far from me when women are nearby." -- Fabio ON THE GRIEF PROCESS "When my Azzedine jacket from 1987 died, I wrapped it up in a box, attached a note saying where it came from and took it to the Salvation Army. It was a big loss." -- Veronica Webb ON TRAGEDY "The worst was when my skirt fell down to my ankles -- but I had on thick tights underneath." -- Naomi Campbell -<>- What is an Eponyms you may wonder? No, I didn't make this one up, eponyms are words we use in everyday life that are based on peoples names, like: Bobbies - Sir Robert(Bobby) Peel, a British politician in 1850 organized a police force in England called bobbies. Braille - Named for Louis Braille of France, who invented it to teach his blind students. Cardigan - No joke! This type of sweater was first worn by none other than the Earl of Cardigan, in Great Britain. Derby - A stiff felt hat favored today by rappers is credited to Edward Stanley, twelfth Earl of Derby. Guillotine - Marie Antionette's favourite little toy came to be in 1789, by Dr.Joseph Guillotin of France. Leotards - In the 1800's a french gymnast, Julius Leotard, designed these little beauties. =================================================================== >-->Fun Places To Net Visit :) Humor In Religion 2 http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/hreligion2.html Best Bed Positions http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/bed.html Amazing Cop Cars http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/copcars.html Maxine On Jesus http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/maxineonjesus.html Ten Life Tips http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/lifetips.html World's Largest Holes http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/holes.html -<>- >From Our Friend John-Paul :) A Very Useful Website, still tasty.com (t/Mitsie) Keeping Food Fresh http://www.stilltasty.com/ --- ...Thanks For The great Tip Site John-Paul! -<>- >From Our Friend Wesley :) Reviews of Cheap Products | Cheapism http://www.cheapism.com/ Allmyapps Application Store for Windows and Linux - Install All Your Apps in 1 Click http://www.allmyapps.com/index.php The Easy Way To Build Your Vocabulary http://www.vocabsushi.com/ Free Textures For Artists & Designers http://www.texturevault.net/ --- ...Great Ones! Thanks Wesley! -<>- >From LynnLynn's Links: Visit Duncan Hines http://www.duncanhines.com/ The Why Files http://whyfiles.org/ Tonebee http://www.tonebee.com/ Rules of Thumb http://www.rulesofthumb.org/ Worse Than Locking Keys In Car http://www.buffaloschips.com/72206.htm Worst Seats http://www.buffaloschips.com/72207.htm WoW http://www.buffaloschips.com/72208.htm Wrong Ball http://www.buffaloschips.com/72209.htm Wrong Gift http://www.buffaloschips.com/72210.htm Hama Rat http://www.buffaloschips.com/72211.htm If You haven't joined LynnLynn's mailing List yet, send a blank e-mail to LynnLynns-links-subscribe@Yahoogroups.com ============================================================= >-->Quotes And Thunkers: "Julia [Roberts], I miss our phone calls. But it seems like ever since you got Caller ID you're never home." --Steve Martin "Male sexual response is brisker and more automatic than the female. It is triggered easily by things -- like putting a quarter in a vending machine." --Dr. Alex Comfort "I have property in LA. A hotel is holding two of my suit- cases." --Soupy Sales If a man is in the forest, and there isn't a woman around, is he still wrong? You know you're old if you can remember when bacon, eggs and sunshine were good for you. >Updated FUN STUFF URLS - Oh Yeah :) Shangy! ------------------------------------------------------------------------- http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/urls.html FUN URLS ------------------------------------------------------------------------- -->This is for all you who love food and DAARE to make it at home Yep. You guessed it - Recipes. These are Tried and True, Yummy to the Tummy, good old fashioned home cooking recipes that are EASY to do :) Visit Shangy's Easy-Does-It Home Recipes: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/easy.html Home Recipes >Got A good Recipe? SHARE IT HERE: Share A Recipe ************************************************************************ >TO SUBSCRIBE: Visit Here This Weeks regular Shangy emails OR For the Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com ************************************************************************