Happy Early Halloween! :) Shangy! >Here are the details on our Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com To UnSubscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com Group home page: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ShangyFunList or Web Site: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/ShangyFunList.html Group email address: ShangyFunList@yahoogroups.com or email me here: bcrsystems@earthlink.net ================ *~* Please Consider Giving To ShangralaFamilyFun.com The cost of the website has gone up dramatically due to the ever increasingly wonderful pages and photos being added each week to entertain you and our fellow Christian families. If every one would chip in $25 or more, we'd be good for the whole year! So Please - I need your help today! "We are each of us angels with but one wing, and can only fly by embracing each other" -Luciano Decrescenzo ~ CALLING ALL CARING ANGELS ~ *~* WE NEED CARING And SHARING Angels *~* >Do You Want To Be A Shangrala Angel? If you'd like to help and be counted as a Shangrala Angel, the easiest way to do that is through online giving. It is easy to use, and most of all, it is secure. Please visit the site, scroll down and click on the donate button. A Secure PAYPAL form page comes up. NOTE: Paypal will generate a 'Quantity 1' and 'Price per item' form. Just ignore the price per item and put whatever it is you desire to give in there. With Paypal, you will have your normal receipt for your 'payment' donation in USD (United States Dollars). You can put a memo in there if you'd like. EVERY LITTLE BIT WILL HELP! Any amount is greatly appreciated and needed! PLEASE Visit Shangrala to Help: http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/index.html OR If you'd rather send us a donation, Please MAIL it here: Elrhea Bigham 502 S. Harrison Van Wert, OH 45891 *~* THANK YOU! MAY GOD BLESS YOU ABUNDANTLY FOR YOUR GIFT! ================ __ __ | |_| |______ _,___ _,___ _ _ \--/ | _ |__ | __ | __ | |_| | /`-' '-`\ |__| |__|__-_,_| ,___| ,___|___, | / \ |_| |_| |_| /.'|/\ /\|'.\ __ __ _ _ \/ | |_| |______| | |______ __ _ __ ______ ______ _,____ | _ |__ | | | __ | | | | --__| --__| __ \ |__| |__|__-_,_|_|_|______|_______|______|______|_| |_| ___ \--/ .' `"-._ Since this is the time /`-' '-`\ / , `'-_.-. for goblins and bats, / \ / /`'. ,' _ | /.'|/\ /\|'.\ `-' `-. ,' ,'\\/ \/ \, ,' ee`-. Halloween spirits and / ./ ,(_ \ , ghosts and cats, (_/\\\ \__|`--' || ///\\| \ || ////||-./`-.} .--|| Weird happenings and / `-.__.-`_.-.| witches brew, | '._,-'`|___} `; / '. |/ || ,;'` | '.__,.-` || ':, These are the things | | || ,;' I wish for you: / / _,.||oOoO.,_ | | \-.O,o_O..-/ / / / \ May the only ghost | / / \ that comes to stay, | | | , | / | \ ) ( ) / Be the Holy Ghost jgs | \ ,'.(:, ),: (_.'. to guide your way. / /'.' ="`""="="=="= '. `'"---'-.__.'"""` ` "" "" `"" ,, , ,, ,\\//, .--') ,\\//, ,\\\///, ,, / / May the only spirit ,\\\///, \\\\//// ,\\//, | / you chance to meet, \\\\//// \\\/// ,\\\///, /'.\ (_.'\ \\\/// ###### \\\\//// \ / ###### ////\\\\ \\\/// '--. .---' Be the spirit of love ////\\\\ /////\\\\\###### ( " ) and warm friends sweet, /////\\\\\//////\\\\////\\\\ '-' //////\\\\\\/,///\\\/////\\\\\ _ ///////\_?_\\(_) //////\\\\\\, ( \ May the only tricks .'`---`'. _j_/////\\\\\(_) ) ) you are /.'a a \.'`---`'. jgs ( ( .-""-. A.-.A asked to do, |: ^ /.'d\ /b \ \ \/ \/ , , \ \' www |: ^ | \ \ =; t /= '._____.'\' VVV / \ |"". ',--' Be the trick '._____.' / // | || of getting /_,)) |_,)) a friend or two. >-->In The 'Shangy' News :) . . . . ,-,--. __| //``-, \ \_`\ )\a-a-? \ \ \_`(_=_/_-`__ \__, , \| | _ _,' ___7 ) | (_)(_`__(_,---' | ( _( ) | / /_| |________| __/__/__|__|_________) _________(__,_|)/ (__)|/____\(_______________ mic I am quite pleased to announce that we have a couple new sponsors for the website ShangralaFamilyFun.com This first company is great if you are seeking a lawyer and/or legal information About DUI and OVI in the State of Ohio: Check out these great resources... Columbus Ohio OVI and DUI Law Resource https://www.findlaw.com/dui/laws-resources/ohio-ovi-dui-laws.html Operating a Vehicle Under the Influence in Ohio https://www.criminalattorneycolumbus.com/drunk-driving-dui-ovi/ Our next company deals with Luxury Homes and Luxury Rehab Residential Treatment Facilities in Los Angeles CA: Visit them here: Are There Any Benefits of Luxury Rehab Centers? Those struggling with drug or alcohol addiction can turn to luxury rehab centers to assist with the detoxification, recovery, and rehabilitation processes. https://www.rehabs.com/treatment/luxury/ or Here: Addiction Detox and Residential Treatment Facility in Los Angeles: Over the years many have trusted us to offer expert guidance, support and the very best in clinical care. When you come to Harmony Place residential treatment center, you will have a dedicated team working with you on your behalf. Free Chatline: https://tinyurl.com/y6s7wz94 Be sure to check these out! ..::''''::.. .:::. .;'' ``;. .... ::::: :: :: :: :: ,;' .;: () ..: `:::' :: :: :: :: ::. ..:,:;.,:;. . :: .::::. `:' :: .:' :: :: `:. :: '''::, :: :: :: `:: :: ;: .:: : :: : : :: ,:'; ::; :: :: :: :: :: ::,::''. . :: `:. .:' :: `:,,,,;;' ,;; ,;;, ;;, ,;;, ,;;, `:,,,,:' :;: `;..``::::''..;' ``::,,,,::'' You can always be assured that I only go with the best for you! :) -<>- >3 HOT Off The 'Shangy' Press :) >AN UPDATE - From BizarreNews: *--- Hypercar breaks speed records in Nevada ---* A U.S. company captured the title of world's fastest production car when its latest model reached an average speed of 316.11 mph. SSC North America has announced that the Tuatara hypercar was tested outside Las Vegas in a pair of high speed runs on Nevada State Highway 160 in opposite directions, allowing for the company to account for factors like wind and road variations. The car averaged a top speed of 316.11 mph, capturing the title of the world's fastest production car. The vehicle reached a top speed of 331.15 during one of the runs, capturing a record for the highest speed ever achieved on a public road. SSC said the Tuatara is the second car made by the company to hold the title of world's fastest production car. The record was previously broken in 2007 by SSC's Ultimate Aero car. The company said it plan a production run of 100 Tuatara cars to be sold commercially. --- ... Check It And The Videos For It Out Here... . .. __..---/______//-----. (( ) .".--.```| - /.--. =: ( VROOM! )) (.: {} :__L______: {} :__; __--( __- -_= ) *--* *--* jnh I've updated this page - World's Fastest Cars! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/fastcars.html This next too hot to handle new page is from our friend Fran. It's a bit on the bizarre side but you should find it quite interesting as well. Human ingenuity never ceases to amaze me. This little town decided to use their wits to overcome nature. Instead of trying to deal with the extreme heat during an opal mining explosion, they went with the flow and used the mines to their advantage. Check out this amazing unique town along with its videos here... _,__ .: Darwin <* / | \ .-./ |. : :, / '-._/ \_ / ' \ .' *: Brisbane .-' ; | | \ / | / Perth \* __.--._ / \ _.' \:. | >__,-' \_/*_.-' Melbourne snd :--, '/ Australia's Dugouts http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/australia2.html --- ...Absolutely stunning! Thanks Fran! Our next hot new page is from our friends Fran and Linda. It is an astounding one showing just how powerful and unpredictable nature can be at times. For instance, what kind of damage can large hail do? Be sure to visit here and see for yourself! .-~*~--,. .-. .-~-. ./OOOOOOOOO\.'OOO`9~~-. .`OOOOOO.OOM.OLSONOOOOO@@OOOOOO\ /OOOO@@@OO@@@OO@@@OOO@@@@@@@@OOOO`. |OO@@@WWWW@@@@OOWWW@WWWW@@@@@@@OOOO). .-'OO@@@@WW@@@W@WWWWWWWWOOWW@@@@@OOOOOO} /OOO@@O@@@@W@@@@@OOWWWWWOOWOO@@@OOO@@@OO| lOOO@@@OO@@@WWWWWWW\OWWWO\WWWOOOOOO@@@O.' \OOO@@@OOO@@@@@@OOW\ \WWWW@@@@@@@O'. `,OO@@@OOOOOOOOOOWW\ \WWWW@@@@@@OOO) \,O@@@@@OOOOOOWWWWW\ \WW@@@@@OOOO.' `~c~8~@@@@WWW@@W\ \WOO|\UO-~' (OWWWWWW@/\W\ ___\WO) `~-~'' \ \WW=*' __\ \ \ \ \ __\ \ \ \ \ \ \ \\ \\ \ \ Weird Rainy Days 2 http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/rainyday2.html --- ...This was shocking to say the least! Thanks Ladies! I've never seen such widespread damage! Then, that night after making this page, a horrendous burst of lightening near our home thunders and shakes our house like an earthquake! Nature reminds us just how powerful it can be in an instant! Yet God is gazillion times more powerful! Amazing! I stand in awe of Him! ======================================================= >-->From SmileZilla: _"_ % (< ? ` " __||___ |\___//_\ (' | ') \\ __|\ , / |/ /: / \ :: \| ######o /| ######## \) ######## \ : / \: / -- %%% %% % /:\ |/|, b'ger A construction worker was whistling and verbally harassing a young girl as she walked by the construction site. She completely ignored him, and just kept on walking. Annoyed the worker yelled, "Well you're an ugly b anyway!" The girl turned around and replied, "Wow, It must be terrible when even an 'ugly b' won't give you the time of day?!" -<>- >Things Your Mother Would Never Say – Yeah, I used to cut class a lot too. – Go ahead and keep that stray dog, honey. I'll be glad to feed and walk him every day. – That outfit isn't skimpy enough, here, unbutton your blouse. – Why don't you hitchhike? It would totally be cheaper. – The curfew is just a general time to shoot for. It's not like I'm running a prison around here. – Don't clean your room so often. It makes the rest of the house look bad. – Can I borrow your new speed metal CDs? – Naw, you don't have to call me, I'll eventually figure it out if you're in trouble. ======================================================= +------------ BIZARRE HOLIDAYS ------------+ October 26 is National Mincemeat Day October 27 is Black Cat Day, National Tell a Story Day - in Scotland and the U.K. - and Navy Day October 28 is Plush Animal Lover's Day October 29 is Hermit Day and National Frankenstein Day October 30 is Frankenstein Friday - last Friday in October, National Candy Corn Day and Mischief Night October 31 is Carve a Pumpkin Day and Halloween ======================================================= >-->From GoodCleanFun: . . (>\---/<) ,' `. / q p \ ( >(_Y_)< ) >-' `-' `-<-. / _.== ,=.,- \ /, )` '( ) ; `._.' `--< : \ | ) \ ) ;_/ hjw `._ _/_ ___.'-\\\ `--\\\ >Hamster Care After buying her kids a pet hamster, after they PROMISED they would take care of it, Mom, as usual, ended up with the responsibility. One evening, exasperated, she asked them, "How many times do you think that hamster would have died if I hadn't looked after it?" After a moment, her youngest son replied quizzically, "Once?" -<>- >Diet Tips My sisters and I have weight problems and are always sharing diet tips. One day my oldest sister was showing us a low-fat cookbook and pointed out a chicken dish she had tried the night before. Reading the ingredients, I commented, "It looks like it would taste really bland." "It did," she replied, "until I added cheese and sour cream." -<>- >Subliminal Ads I would like to thank all of the folks who emailed me about the "subliminal" Pepsi ads in "Top Gun". As was pointed out more than once, here and in mail, the advertisements aren't really subliminal if you can perceive them consciously. [drink Pepsi] I know what "subliminal" means [drink Pepsi] as opposed to superliminal, or ultraliminal, or megaliminal, or liminal, or whatever the correct phraseology is. [you love Pepsi] This kind of advertisement, though, while not totally invisible [drink Pepsi] is still real hard to see ... I've seen Top Gun a total of six times now, and never noticed the Pepsi tray until my sixth time, on cable. After running the tape back thru again, I could tell that the Pepsi [drink drink drink Pepsi] logo was really there -- not just a red-white-and-blue [Pepsi] smear. Perhaps we need a new phrase for this half-overt advertising [bathe in Pepsi]. I propose the term "mood-advertising," or perhaps "musak-vertising" ... something which while there, you have to concentrate to perceive [Pepsi is good for you]. Once we put a name to this dread disease, we can set about finding a cure. Gosh, I'm thirsty. -<>- >Contact Lens The teenager lost a contact lens while playing basketball in his driveway. After a fruitless search, he went inside and told his mother the lens was nowhere to be found. Undaunted, she went outside and in a few minutes, returned with the lens in her hand. "How did you manage to find it, Mom?" the teenager asked. "We weren't looking for the same thing," she replied. "You were looking for a small piece of plastic. I was looking for $250." -<>- >Coupons I work as a cashier at a grocery store that was celebrating its grand re-opening. To draw customers, we were mailing out coupons for various free items, such as eggs, soda, chips, etc. The coupon for the chips was very specific: it had to be a 13-1/4 ounce bag of Lays Potato Chips. One lady was a bit confused. Upon handing me her bag of chips and the corresponding coupon, she said, "The coupon says thirteen and one fourth, but I guess this is close enough, right?" I checked. The net weight printed on the bag was 13.25 ounces. I looked up, certain she was joking. She wasn't. ========================================================= ___ ___ .'` `""--.._..--""` `'. / .-""-"-""-. \ | / \ | \, | .--.-.--. | ,/ (_'- |` > `| -'_) / | < | \ | (__..---..__) | | (`|\o_/ \_o/|`) | | \( > )/ | | [>=| --- |=<] | | ,\__\ /__/, | |.____.|\==='-'===/|.____.| \_____;_\=======/_;_____/ | _)'.===.'(_ | ; \-._\_/_.-/ ; /\_\_\_\ () /_/_/_/\ '-.._____.-'-._____..-' | /`\ | |_ | | _| _.;____ | | ____;._ jgs /` `| |` `\ '------'--' '--'------' >-->Halloween SMILES: Michael: What treat do eye doctors give out on Halloween? Matthew: I don’t know. What? Michael: Candy corneas. A photographer goes to a haunted castle determined to get a picture of a ghost on Halloween. The ghost he encounters turns out to be friendly and poses for a snapshot. The happy photographer later downloads his photos and finds that the photos are underexposed and completely blank. Moral to the story: The spirit is willing, but the flash is weak. Brett: What do mummies like listening to on Halloween? Brent: I don’t know. Brett: Wrap music! Bill: Why did the policeman ticket the ghost? McKenzie: Why? Bill: It didn’t have a haunting license. .-. heehee /aa \_ __\- / ) .-. .-. (__/ / heehee _/oo \ _/ ..\ / \ ( \v /__ ( \ u/__ / \__ \/ ___) \ \__) \_.-._._ ) .-. / \ / \ `-` / ee\_ / \_ __/ \ __\ o/ ) \_.-.__ ) ( _._.-._/ hoho (___ \/ '-' jgs '-' / \ _/ \ teehee ( __.-._/ '-' Sarah: What are a ghost’s favorite rides at the fair? Brian: Tell me. Sarah: The scary-go-round and rollerghoster! Max: What would you find on a haunted beach? Sam: I’m stumped. Max: A sand-witch! Chris: What’s worse than being a five-ton witch on Halloween? Jill: No clue. Hit me with it. Chris: Being her broom! Daffynition: Pocahontas — A card game that comes back to scare you. Jake: Why couldn’t the ghost see its mom and dad? Philip: I don’t know. Jake: Because they were trans-parents! Brandon: Which ghost is the best dancer? Nolan: I don’t know. Brandon: The Boogie Man! , .--') / / | / /`.\ (_.'\ \ / '--. .---' jgs ( " ) '-' Everett: What’s a ghoul’s favorite game? Francisco: What? Everett: Hide-and-ghost-seek. Jerry: Why do ghosts like to ride in elevators? Woody: Why? Jerry: It raises their spirits. Joshua: What do you get if you cross Bambi with a ghost? Belia: What? Joshua: Bamboo. , \`-, , =- .-._/ \_____)\ (" / =- '-; ,_____.-' =- jgs /__.' Tim: What is a ghost’s favorite dessert? Tom: What? Tim: Booberry pie. Tom: What’s a ghost’s favorite room? Jerry: I dunno. Tom: The living room! Tom Swiftie: “That ghost movie was horrible!” Tom booed. Aidan: What is a ghost’s favorite Cub Scout event? Taylor: What? Aidan: Boo and Gold. Aidan: What is a witch’s favorite Cub Scout event? Taylor: I give up. Aidan: Brew and Gold. Aidan: What is a werewolf’s favorite Cub Scout event? Taylor: What? Aidan: Pack meetings, of course! A book never written: “Ghost Hunting” by E. Gadd. Jess: Why don’t ghosts like rain on Halloween? Thomas: Why? Jess: It dampens their spirits! , , /(.-""-.)\ |\ \/ \/ /| | \ / =. .= \ / | \( \ o\/o / )/ \_, '-/ \-' ,_/ / \__/ \ \ \__/\__/ / ___\ \|--|/ /___ /` \ / `\ jgs / '----' \ Race: What is a goblin’s favorite cheese? Nathan: What is it? Race: Monster-ella! Joker: Why did the monster’s mother knit him three socks for Halloween? Harvey: I have no clue. Joker: She heard he grew another foot! From: http://boyslife.org/home/23079/25-funny-halloween-jokes/ ========================================================= >-->From Our Friend LouiseAu :) ____, /.---| ` | ___ (=\. /-. \ |\/\_|"| | |_\ |;-| ; | / \| |_/ \ | )/\/ \ | ( '| \ | | \_ / \ | / \_.--\ \ | (|\` | | \ | | '. | / \ jgs \ \.__.__.-._) >SMILES Two brawny men came to my house to install some new floor covering in the kitchen. Once they had moved the stove and refrigerator out of the way, it was not long before the job was done. As they were getting ready to leave, I asked them to put the heavy appliances back in place. The two men demanded $45 for this service, stating it was not in their contract. I really had no choice but to pay them. As soon as they left, however, the doorbell rang. It was the two men. They asked me to move my car, which was blocking their van. I told them my fee: $45. ---------- The new girl friend asked the prospective beau, "Have you ever been married?" "As a matter of fact I've been married and widowed four times." "My goodness! What did they die from?" "The first three died from eating poison mushrooms and the last one fell off the roof." "Fell off the roof??? How did that happen?" "She wouldn't eat the mushrooms." ---------- There's a new health study that was just completed that claims making love decreases your chances of getting a cold. The more you have, the less chance you'll have of catching a cold. Can you just picture how it's gonna be in office's across the country this winter, every time a woman sneezes there'll be some guy saying, "Hey, I got something for that." ---------- A man realized he needed to purchase a hearing aid, but he felt unwilling to spend much money. "How much do they run?" he asked the clerk. "That depends," said the salesman. "They run from $2.00 to $2,000." "Let's see the $2.00 model," he said. The clerk put the device around the man's neck. "You just stick this button in your ear and run this little string down to your pocket," he instructed. "How does it work?" the customer asked. "For $2.00 it doesn't work," the salesman replied. "But when people see it on you, they'll talk louder!" ---------- I began thinking about my own mortality after I became a widower. One day my daughter called home from college, and I announced to her, "I think it's time for us to talk about where I would like to be buried." "It's way too soon to even think of anything like that," she snapped indignantly. Then there was a brief silence. "Wait a minute, did you say married or buried?" When I repeated buried, she said, "Oh, okay, sure." ------- Little Johnny was staying with his grandmother for a few days. He'd been playing outside for a while when he came into the house and asked her, "Grandma, what is it called when people are sleeping on top of each other?" She was a little taken aback, but decided to tell him the truth. "It's called making love, darling." Little Johnny just said, "OK" and went back outside to play. A few minutes later he came back in and said angrily, "Grandma, it is not called making love! It's called bunk beds!" ------- When hurricane Sandy struck the East Coast, even houses of worship were not spared. A local television station was interviewing a woman from New Jersey, and asked how the loss of churches in the area would affect their lives. Without hesitation, the woman replied, "I don't know 'bout all those other people, but we ain't gone to Churches in years. We gets our chicken from Popeye's." The look of disbelief on the interviewer's face was priceless. ---------- A family of mice were surprised by a big cat. Father Mouse jumped and said, "Bow-wow!" The cat ran away. "What was that, Father?" asked Baby Mouse. "Well, son, that's why it's important to learn a second language." ---------- "Say, Jim," Steve said to his pal, "how do you like your new job?" "It's the worst job I ever had." "How long have you been there?" "About three months." "Why don't you quit?" "No way. This is the first time in 20 years that I've looked forward to going home." --- ...LOL! Thanks LouiseAu! -<>- _ /\ )\ _ __)_)__ .'`--`'. )\_ .-'._'-'_.'-. / ^ ^ \ .'`---`'. .'.' /o\'/o\ '.'. \ \/\/\/ / / <> <> \ : ._: 0 :_. : \ '------' _J_ | A |: \\/\_/\// : | _/)_ .'`---`'. \ <\_/> / : :\/\_/\/: : / .'`----`'./.'b d \ _?_._`"`_.'`'-:__:__:__:__:-' /.'<\ /> \: 0 | .'`---`'.`` _/( /\ |:,___A___,|' V===V / /.'a . a \.'`---`'. __(_(__ \' \_____/ /'._____.' |: ___ /.'/\ /\ \ .-'._'-'_.'-:.______.' _?_ \' \_/ |: ^ | .'.' (o\'/o) '.'. .'`"""`'. '._____.'\' 'vvv' / / :_/_: A :_\_: \ / ^.^ \ '.__.__.' | : \'=...='/ : | \ `===` / jgs \ : :'.___.': : / `-------` '-:__:__:__:__:-' >My Dog Love My parents told me I could name my new pet dog anything I wanted and since I was a mischievous little boy, I decided to name the dog Love. It seemed funny at first until you understand all the confusion that this caused me in my later life. Like the day that I went to the town hall to get a dog license for Love. The clerk asked me what I wanted. I told him I wanted a license for Love. He said, “I’d like to have one, too.” Then, I said, “You don’t understand. She’s a dog.” He replied, “Look man, I don’t care how she looks.” “No no, I ’have had Love since I was 5!” He replied, “You must have been an early bloomer.” When I decided to get married, I told the minister I wanted to have Love at the wedding. He told me I’d have to wait until after the wedding. When I protested that Love had played a big part in my life and that my whole life revolved around Love, he said he did not want to hear about my personal life. After my wife and I got married, I took the dog with us on the honeymoon. When I checked into the hotel, I told the clerk that I wanted a room for my wife and wanted one for Love. She replied, “Sir, every room in the hotel can be used for Love.” I said, “You don’t understand. Love keeps me awake at night.” The clerk said, “Me too!” When my wife and I separated, we went to court to fight for custody of the dog. When I told the Judge I had Love before I was married, he grinned and said, “Me too.” One day my dog Love and I took a walk and he ran away from me. I spent hours looking for that dog. A policeman came by and asked what I was doing in this alley at midnight. I told him, “I’m looking for Love!” My case comes up next Tuesday. Now that I have been thrown in jail, married, divorced and had more trouble with that dog than I ever imagined, I’m in counseling. My psychiatrist asked me what my problem was. I said, “Love has left my life. It’s like losing a best friend and I’m so lonely.” He said, “Look, you and I both know that love is not man’s best friend. Why don’t you just go get yourself a dog...” --- ...Oh My! HaHa! Thanks LousieAu! -<>- |\-/| =( )= / \ | | / \ _\ _/._ .' `))` '. / (( , \ ; , \) , ; ; /c\ , /c\ | | /_\ | | |\ , , , , /| | \ \_`.`.`.`.`_/ / jgs '.____.___.____.' >Excerpts from classified sections of city newspapers: Illiterate? Write today for free help. Auto Repair Service. Free pick-up and delivery. Try us once, you'll never go anywhere again. Our experienced Mom will care for your child. Fenced yard, meals, and smacks included. Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children. Man wanted to work in dynamite factory. Must be willing to travel. Stock up and save. Limit: one. Semi-Annual after Christmas Sale. Year old teacher needed for pre-school. Experience preferred. Mixing bowl set designed to please a cook with round bottom for efficient beating. Girl wanted to assist magician in cutting-off-head illusion. Blue Cross and salary. Dinner Special -- Turkey $2.35; Chicken or Beef $2.25; Children $2.00 For sale: antique desk suitable for lady with thick legs and large drawers. Now is your chance to have your ears pierced and get an extra pair to take home, too. We do not tear your clothing with machinery. We do it carefully by hand. For sale. Three canaries of undermined s%x. Great Dames for sale. Have several very old dresses from grandmother in beautiful condition. Tired of cleaning yourself. Let me do it. Vacation Special: have your home exterminated. Get rid of aunts. Zap does the job in 24 hours. Toaster: A gift that every member of the family appreciates. Automatically burns toast. For Rent: room hated apartment. Man, honest. Will take anything. Used Cars: Why go elsewhere to be cheated. Come here first. Christmas taxable. Handmade gifts for the hard-to-find person. Wanted: Hair cutter. Excellent growth potential. Wanted. Man to take care of cow that does not smoke or drink. Our bikinis are exciting. They are simply the tops. Wanted. Widower with school age children requires person to assume general housekeeping duties. Must be capable of contributing to growth of family. Teacher Strikes Idle Kids Lawyers Give Poor Free Legal Advice Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant Killer Sentenced to Die for Second Time in 10 Years Croupiers On Strike - Management: "No Big Deal" Queen Mary Having Bottom Scraped Women's Movement Called More Broad-Based Antique Stripper to Display Wares at Store Prostitutes Appeal to Pope 20-Year Friendship Ends at Altar If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last A While Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures And now, the Superstore unequaled in size, unmatched in variety, unrivaled inconvenience. We will oil your sewing machine and adjust tension in your home for $1.00. --- ...Oh My! Teehee! Thanks LouiseAu! ========================================================= >-->From HandyHints: __ __ /_ _^^_ _\ _____|________|______ `=====.'""""""'.=====` / /a /a \ .-. | /\ | <" ) \ / / \ .`\, _'. \/\/\/ .'_ \ \_\ ./,' '-.\\'-------' \`------'/ '--""---'//.-' ###'.-'/________ \/""""\/ ________\'-.'### '/` \ : / `\` | | \ : | | \ \_____:_____ / [I=I=[_]I=I] / | \ / |_ \ / /\ \ / /##\ \ | ,/ ## \, | \ \ ## / / \ \ ## / / \ \##/ / jgs \ /\/\ / __,\_/X##X\_/.__ '.'/|\\XX//|\'.` '/'|.\##/,|`\' ## ## ## \ ## / / \ , \ \\##// , / /, /. ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ Don't you hate it when you open up the vegetable drawer and spot that plastic produce bag at the bottom that's filled with green slime that used to be herbs? You can extend the lifespan of washed herbs and greens by several days by rolling them up in damp paper towels and placing them in zipper-lock bags with the seals left slightly open. -<>- * Don't toss your old cell phones in the trash! With the average consumer replacing their cell phones every eighteen months, 130 million cell phones are being disposed of each year. If these go into landfill sites, the toxins from the cell battery leak into the soil and pollute the ground. Use a recycling program. An added bonus to this is many of these programs contribute to charities. * Save energy and money You don't need to light up a room no one is using. Save energy and money by getting into the habit of switching off the lights when you leave the room. For standard bulbs, do this each time you leave. For energy savers, do this if you are leaving the room for more than fifteen minutes. You can also buy Motion Sensing Light Switches for as little as $13! You will also save on your cooling costs, as lights can make your rooms hotter! -<>- >Freezing Tips * freeze things flat and stack them. Whether it's soups, stews, or ground meat, the flatter and wider you can get them, the faster they'll freeze and defrost, which not only makes you more efficient, it also improves the quality of the food (the longer something takes to freeze, the more cellular damage it will suffer). * When freezing raw meat, soups, and stews, if you have a vacuum sealer, use it! Otherwise, place foods in heavy-duty freezer bags, squeeze out all the air, lay the bag flat, and use your hands to work the contents into as flat and even a shape as possible. * When freezing vegetables, cut them into pieces 1-inch or less and blanch any green vegetables. Place them on a large plate or sheet tray spaced apart from each other and freeze them solid before transferring to a plastic freezer bag and storing flat. * Take the time to chop a few stalks of celery and a few onions. After sauteing them in margarine or butter, spoon them into ice cube trays, freeze, then pop the frozen veggie cubes into a labeled airtight freezer container to store. They are an invaluable addition to soups or casseroles when you're in a hurry. * When I cook fresh broccoli, which I do often, I prefer eating the tender florets rather than the thick stems. So I slice these stems into thin rounds, then place them in freezer bags, just like with the celery and onions. When I make vegetable soup, I simply pull some of them out to help the flavor. I also do this with the thick stems of cauliflower. This way, no part of the vegetable is wasted. * If you're frying bacon always fry an extra pounds or two. Drain the slices well, then freeze them in freezer bags. The slices don't stick together, so it's easy to remove a few from the bag for a sandwich or to crumble small amounts for a recipe. * Before shredding soft cheeses like mozzarella, put the cheese in the freezer for about 30 minutes. This makes it easier to shred, and the cheese doesn't stick to the grater. * Make Your Freezer More Efficient Freezing used plastic bottles or jugs (milk and orange juice work great) full of water will help keep your freezer at a level temperature and use less energy to maintain it. If your power ever fails the extra ice will keep your freezer cold longer, and you can always throw them in a cooler in you're short of ice! ======================================================= >-->In The Worldly News: Justice W/ Judge Jeanine, Full Episode! 10/24/20 https://www.bitchute.com/video/Bh7VG9TLNlaC/ ChiComms Furious at Trump’s Quick Recovery, Plotting New Attack https://tinyurl.com/y5um94zg Hunter Biden’s Companies Sold US Stealth Tech to the Chicomms / Brexit Talks Continue / Does Joe Even Know Who the President is? / Biden Shuts Down Reporter Asking About Hunter / Messages Show Joe Was Lying, He was Working with Hunter / Schumer Obstructs Biden Investigation / Biden Babbles and Wanders Stage in PA Rally / CA Government Cuts Power to a Million People / Biden Brags About Putting Together Huge Voter Fraud Organization - MORE: https://reliablenewsnow.com/ Burn It Down: Soros Planning Nationwide Chaos if Trump Wins / Everything You Missed From the Last Presidential Debate - MORE" https://americanactionnews.com/ Former Trump Foe Megyn Kelly Declares Trump Winner in Debate With Biden / Fox News Host Neil Cavuto Rips Biden for Disastrous Remarks on Fracking / German Globalist Think Tank Calls for Suppression of Conservative Media in US - MORE: https://mediaalert.news/ Westwing News: https://www.whitehouse.gov/westwingreads/ WhiteHouseNews: https://www.whitehouse.gov/1600daily/ Latest From AFA: http://tinyurl.com/j7lakqw Students For Life https://tinyurl.com/yd5nxmu6 Latest From OperationRescue: http://www.operationrescue.org/ Latest Product Alert: Fish Recall Impacts 19 States http://www.emergencyemail.org/products/?fmt=text Latest Health Alert: Listeria Outbreak Linked to Meats http://www.emergencyemail.org/health/?fmt=text Click to Give Free https://tinyurl.com/y2abb8d2 -<>- >From BizarreNews: An idiot in Seattle narrowly avoided strengthening the gene pool when he survived being stuck head-first down a chute attached to a railroad car for 18 hours. Emergency crews responded to the scene after receiving 911 calls from people who heard someone yelling for help, said the Seattle Fire Department. "We don't see these very often," spokesman Kyle Moore said. "Apparently overnight he had crawled into a hole in a void space of the car and slid head-first at a 45 degree angle down this little chute and was stuck. He could not move, and he was stuck in this very small confined space." "If he actually successfully made it through the small hole at the end he would have just been underneath the train car," he said. Firefighters were able to rescue the man by pulling him out by his feet. It was unclear why the man crawled into the chute. The man was very stiff by the time firefighters got him out, but appeared not to have suffered any serious physical injury. Any preexisting brain damage is subject to speculation. -<>- A Florida Man is accused of striking his girlfriend with a pumpkin and its innards during a 2 AM confrontation in the couple's apartment, police report. According to a criminal complaint, Nathan Garisto, 26, was arrested on a domestic battery charge. Garisto, free on $1000 bond, has been ordered to have no contact with the 29-year-old victim. Police say that when they responded to the couple's Largo residence, the victim was "covered in pumpkin seeds and pulp." Garisto, police noted, was "heavily intoxicated while engaged in a verbal argument with his girlfriend." After refusing his girlfriend's requests to leave the home, Garisto allegedly "threw a pumpkin and all insides of the pumpkin at the subject," the complaint alleges. When questioned by police, Garisto claimed that he only "threw the pumpkin at the sliding doors," and not at the victim. Garisto has pleaded not guilty to the misdemeanor count. A judge ordered him to wear an alcohol monitor as part of his bond conditions. Court records show that Garisto's rap sheet includes convictions for drunk driving, marijuana possession, careless driving, and probation violation. *--- Space Station air leak repaired with tea ---* The crew of the International Space Station plugged a longstanding air leak after locating the source with the help of a tea bag. Russian space agency Roscosmos said the station had been experiencing a mysterious air leak since September 2019, but the leak was minor enough that fixing it wasn't considered a priority until the leak rate increased in August. Roscosmos said the source of the leak was finally found when cosmonaut Anatoly Ivanishin broke open a tea bag, allowing leaves to float free in the transfer chamber of the Zvezda Service Module area of the station. The crew sealed off the area and monitored the leaves on video cameras, noting that the tiny tea fragments were floating toward a scratch in the wall that was then confirmed to be the source of the leak. The leak was patched Monday using Kapton tape. *--- This sounds like good prenatal care (NOT!) ---* A California athlete's speed is going viral for an unusual reason after she ran a mile in under 6 minutes -- while 9 months pregnant. Makenna Myler, 28, said her doctors cleared her to continue running with the Valor Track Club in Orange County five to six times a week while pregnant. Myler's husband, Mike, bet her $100 that she could not run a mile in under 8 minutes, and she decided to take on the challenge only one week before her due date. The runner crushed the goal, finishing with a time of 5 minutes, 25 seconds. The average time for a female runner to complete a mile is 10 minutes, 40 seconds. "I think pregnancy is a beautiful thing and it's not an injury or a sickness, that you're still really capable," Myler told Good Morning America. "Someone check the Guinness stats. My wife is an absolute champion," Mike Myler wrote. *--- German man sets body modification record ---* A German man set a Guinness World Record for most body modifications -- and he says he isn't finished altering his body. Rolf Buchholz said his enthusiasm for body modification didn't awaken until he got his first tattoo at age 40, but he soon became addicted and now has 516 body modifications, including tattoos, piercings and subdermal implants. Buchholz previously set the world record for most piercings when they were officially counted at 453 -- including 158 around his lips alone. Buchholz said he has added more body modifications since they were officially counted at 516, and he is still considering further modifications. --- ...Sorry - Here is a video of him... (warning on the gross side) https://tinyurl.com/y5dclvly ========================================================= >-->From TheGroaner: .-. _)/ (0,0) .\ (u) () .-. _\) .-="=-.// (o,o) \,//==\=== (e) () ===== .-. .-="=-. \(_ .-. _____ =,= (a.a) //==I==\\,/ (d.b) ()--___(0V0) (/_ (=) () ="= () (u) ||()----' \, ___.="==-._ \`(0V0) .-="-. |' \\ ()---` ==\==\\ /|) ||\\ //==/=\\ ==" \' ="= () || \\ ==. () ==== ()_/_ ==" ____(0V0) \` jgs () () \, `\"= ` ()---` // (|\ // // \\ ___(0);` \)/ .-. || // '/ '/ ()---' \\ /,(o,o) |' () "== "== \\ () (w) ==" \\ () /_ ___ \\,=", \` .-. // '-()-() =/=\\ ==" (o.o) '/ //\\|| ==== () .-. \(_ (n) "== /` \\| ="= `| (-.-) ,/ .-="=-. \) ==" `(0V0) '-- (-) () // =T= \\,/ joan stark .-="=.// >Trick or Treat? The door bell, rings, and a man answers it. Here stands this plain but well dressed kid, saying, "Trick or Treat!" The man asks the kids what he's dressed up like for Halloween. The kid says, "I'm an IRS agent." Then he takes 28% of the man's candy, leaves, and doesn't say "Thank You". -<>- >The Top 10 Least Popular Halloween Handouts 1. Spinach flavored Rice Cakes 2. Teeth removing Taffy 3. Metamucil in a straw 4. Ex-Lax Brownies 5. Caramel Covered Zucchini 6. Colored Crisco on a Stick 7. Hot steaming bowl of pumpkin guts 8. Chocolate Covered Prunes 9. A Handful of Red Man 10. Used underwear -<>- _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ .' ___...-'. /__......-----``` \ /`---...._________......---'\ : : | )\ )\ | | ( `-. `. -. | | `-. .'` ~ `. | \ / ` .-.` \ / \ | `( @ ) ~| / \ \~ .``-' `/ / `._ `-.___.-` _.' `-._ _.-' `-.-=-.-' ((o)) LGB // \\ .---/ \_/ \---. ( '._____.' ) `-------------' >Q and A Quickies Q: What do you get if you divide the circumference of your jack-o'-lantern by it's diameter? A: Pumpkin pi. Q: Why don't witches like to ride their brooms when they're angry? A: They're afraid of flying off the handle! Q: Who won the skeleton beauty contest? A: No body. Q: Who protects the shores where spirits live? A: The Ghost Guard! Q: What do you call a skeleton who won't work? A: Lazy Bones! Q: What happened when the werewolf swallowed a clock? A: He got ticks! Q: What kind of car does a ghost drive? A: A Boo-ick. Q: Who did Frankenstein take to the prom? A: His ghoul friend. Q: When does a ghost have breakfast? A: In the moaning. Q: When does a skeleton laugh? A: When something tickles his funny bone. Q: Why did the monster eat a light bulb? A: Because he was in need of a light snack. Q: Why are graveyards so noisy? A: Because of all the coffin! ========================================================= >-->From CleanLaffs: __ __ __ \ \ / / ,'__`. \ ` / / / \ \ ___ | | \ \__/ / /:;'` |_| `.__,' :::\ _________ ;:::\ _.-'',' : `.``-._ _..::::::::.._ ,-'___ ; : : ___`-. `'::::::::::'' ,',',---`. : ,'---.`.`. _):::::(_ / /,'::::::\ ,^. /::::::`.\ \ |:::::::::: / ,`--...___/ /:::\ \___...--'. \ |:::::::::| / : : /_____\ : : \ ::::::::::: : : : : : : : ;::::::::::: | : : ___ : ___ : ; | ::::::::::::| | _:..-'_'.-.\__:__/,-.`_`-..:_ | ::::::::::::: : :.--'''::::::`---'::::::```--,; ; \:::::::::;' \ \\:::::::::::::::::::::::::// / :::::::::| \ \\:::___:::::::::::___:::// / |::::::::: \ `::|--:\:::::::::/;--|:;' / ;:::::::::\ `. `' \\_______// '' ,' ::::::::::::\ `-._`. ``-----'' ,'_.-' |::::::::::::: `-.._`.___,'_..-' ;::::::::::::| ____ _ _ __ __ ____ _ _ _ __ _ ::::::::::::::| | _ \ | | | || \ / || _ \ | |/ /| || \ | | |:::::::::::::| | |_) )| | | || . ` , || |_) )| ' / | || . \| | |:::::::::::::| | __/ | |_| || |\_/| || __/ | . \ | || |\ ' | |:::::::::::::: |_| `.___,'|_| |_||_| |_|\_\|_||_| \__| ;::::::::::::::\ _ _ _____ _ ____ ::::::::|\:::::::\ | | | || ___| / \ | _ \ |:::::::||\:::::::: | |_| || |_ / _ \ | | \ \ |:::::::|| :::::::| | _ || _|_ / ___ \ | |_/ / ::::::::|| |::::::; |_| |_||_____|/_/ \_\|____/ SSt `:::::;'' ::::::/ \::;' I was walking past an alley last night, when I heard, "Help! Help!" coming from behind a dumpster. Two thugs were trying to steal an old lady's handbag, but she was putting up a heck of a fight and wouldn't let go. I wondered if I should get involved, or keep walking and pretend I didn't see anything. I finally decided that I should help. She was one tough old lady, but the three of us finally got that handbag. -<>- So you want a day off. Let's take a look at what you are asking for: There are 365 days per year available for work. There are 52 weeks per year in which you already have 2 days off per week, leaving 261 days available for work. Since you spend 16 hours each day away from work, you have used up 170 days, leaving only 91 days available. You spend 30 minutes each day on coffee break, which counts for 23 days each year, leaving only 68 days available. With a 1 hour lunch each day, you used up another 46 days, leaving only 22 days available for work. You normally spend 2 days per year on sick leave. This leaves you only 20 days per year available for work. We are off 5 holidays per year, so your available working time is down to 15 days. We generously give 14 days vacation per year, which leaves only 1 day available for work and I'll be darned if you are going to take that day off! -<>- A seven-year-old boy is sitting at the dinner table with his parents. Suddenly he announces, "Me and Janie next door are gonna get married!" "Oh?" says the mother, amused. "And how old is Janie?" "Six," replies the boy. "Well," says the father, "what are you going to do for money?" "I get 5 dollars a week allowance," says the son, "and Janie gets 2. We figured that if we put them together, we'll be okay." "I see," says the father. "But what are you going to do if you have any children?" "Well," says the boy, "so far we've been lucky." -<>- A woman said to her friend, "I don't know what to do. My husband is such a mess maker that you can't imagine. He doesn't put anything in its place, I am always going around the house organizing things." The friend says, "Take a tip from me. The first week after we were married I told my husband firmly, 'Every glass and plate that you take, wash when you are done and put back in its place.'" The first woman asked, "Did it help?" Her friend said, "I don't know. I haven't seen him since." -<>- "My invention can detect human stupidity. It has a very simple interface. All I do is point it at people." "Then what does it do?" "Why would it need to do anything else?" --Dogbert, Dilbert ========================================================= _...---..._ ,'_ _`. / / `. ,' \ \ : \___`._,'___/ : _ | .. /_\ ,, | _ / \ : \`-.___.-'/ : /,\ /,' \ \ `._____,' / /: \ |O) | `.__..---..__.' || ,| _ || .| _ _ _ || O| _ _ _ |' || _ /,\ |'| | /.\ /;\ /,\ |' ;| /'\ /.\ /,\ | ,O| /`\ _|_|_|___|_|_|_|_|_|_|_|_'_|_|_|_|_|_|_|_|___|_|_|_ -=o===-. __ -___/___\___ ,-==O==-' _ -.__ --- _ ___,-___-___`_| |___.__-o__'_________-.__ |,| | ; | |||| HAPPY || | | |,| |'| | ,|| |`| |o| | | | |'|| HALLOWEEN!|| |;| ||| |,| | |'| |;| _|_|_|___|_|_||___________||_|_|_|_|_|_|_|___|_|_|_ __,--. -.__,--. `-==O=-._ ._ ,- -- _ --=o=-._ ____-o_______-__-'___`_-________.___-______,-._____ |,| |,-'| |,| |;| |o| |'-.| |,| |(| |`| |,-'| |,| SSt/jrei >-->From AlphaJokes: >What is it??? Schwartzenegger has a big one Michael J. Fox has a small one Madonna doesn't have one The Pope has one but doesn't use his Clinton uses his all the time Mickey Mouse has an unusual one George Burns' was hot Jerry Seinfeld is very, very proud of his We never saw Lucy use Desi's So What is it? . . . . . . . . "A Last Name." -<>- >Tap Tap A passenger in a taxi wanted to ask the driver something and tapped him on the shoulder. The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went onto the sidewalk and stopped centimeters from a shop. For a second everything was quiet in the car then the driver said: "Mister, don't ever do that again. You scared the living daylights out of me." The passenger apologized and said he didn't know that a little tap would scare him so. The driver replied: "Sorry sir, it's really not your fault. Today is my first day as a cab driver. I've been driving a hearse for the last 25 years!" -<>- The stockbroker received notice from the IRS that he was being audited. He showed up at the appointed time and place with all his financial records, then sat for what seemed like hours as the accountant pored over them. Finally the IRS agent looked up and commented, "You must have been a tremendous fan of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle." "Why would you say that?" wondered the broker. "Because you've made more brilliant deductions on your last three returns than Sherlock Holmes made in his entire career." -<>- >Near the ocean A couple lived near the ocean. One summer, they noticed a girl at the beach regularly. They watched as she approached people, spoke quietly, then walked away. They speculated about what she was doing, but were not sure. Then they realized she only approached people with boom boxes. So the husband took his boom box to the beach. Sure enough, the girl approached him. When he went home, his wife anxiously asked what the girl was doing. "She sells batteries," he told her. "She sells C cells by the seashore." -<>- >Energy Output An average person puts out about 100 watts of energy. Here's the math: 2000 kilocalories/day in food (approximate) 4.16 kilojoules/kilocalorie 60 seconds/minute 60 minutes/hour 24 hours/day ((4160 x 2000) / (24 * 60 * 60)) ==> 96 joules/second This is a useful rule of thumb: When you host a group of twenty people, you should expect your room to warm up as if it contained two one-kilowatt electric heaters, and plan to cool the room appropriately. Energy throughput is the bread and butter of engineering and technology. I cannot imagine how anyone at MIT can avoid viewing other people as 100 watt light bulbs. -- Source unknown -<>- _______ ,,--'' ''--,, ,-' '-, / \ | | | | | |\ /| | |\ | | \ / | | /| | \ | | '-, ,-' | | / | | '-| | '-, ,-' | |-' | | | \ / | | | | ,-;;/ \;;-, | | | ,' \__|;;;/ , , \;;;|__/ ', | \/ | | \/ / ,-| |-, \ ; \ / ; \ '-, ,-' / '-,, ' ,,-' '-, \'-, ,-' ', \ ''--,, ,' \ ''--,, / / |\ /| |( )| |'-, ,-'| low ''-,-'' >Reality Rules for Teens Rule #1. Life is not fair. Get used to it. The average teen uses the phrase "it's not fair" 6 times a day. You got it from your parents, who said it so often, they may have been the most idealistic generation ever. When your parents started hearing it from their own kids, they realized Rule #1. Rule #2. The real world won't care as much about your self-esteem as your school does. This may come as a shock. When inflated self-esteem meets reality, it doesn't seem fair. (See Rule No. 1) Rule #3. If you think your teacher is tough, wait 'till you get a boss. He doesn't have tenure, so he tends to be a bit edgier. When you screw up, he is not going to ask you how feel about it. Rule #4. It's not your parents' fault. If you screw up, you are responsible. This is the flip side of "It's my life" and "You're not the boss of me." When you turn 18, it's on your dime. Don't whine about it or you'll sound like a baby boomer. Rule #5. Television is not real life. Your life is not a sitcom, nor a soap opera. Your problems will not all be solved in 30 minutes, and your friends will not be as perky and cute as Jennifer Aniston. Rule #6. Be nice to nerds. You may end up working for them. Most of us do. Rule #7. Enjoy it. Sure, parents are a pain and school's a bother, but someday you'll realize how much fun it was to be teenager. Why not start now? -- Original source unknown ,-"-._ _.-"-, )'. `-. _,,,_ .-` .'( | `'. `-"` `"-` .'` | \ .-' '-. / _ .' .--. .--. '. '-(-' _ / (.=.| |.=.) \ _ . '._(_) : \_o/ .-. \_o/ : ( )_.' \ : ( ) :.-' ,-''-.; .___ .-`Y`-. ___. ;_.'-, \ '-.\ \ .--( .'. )--. / _./_| '._.-'`'-., _;-'\_/'-;_ ,.-'`'._`/ jgs_.',_.-' / `'''` `.___.' `'''` \ '-.__`-, '. -'/_.-| ; ; | \ _/ ';'` \ / \ /'---', / . '._,__,_,' ',_,__,_,' \ / . .'\ .'\ : \ ; \\\ \\\ ; | : /'._.' \\ /'._.' \\ ' | | ( ______/ ) ( ______/ ) | | : `~~~~~~~` .-. `~~~~~~~` : | | : / `\\ : | | _, ( __/ ) _, : | | : \ : `~~~` : .' | | `-._ _,' | | . \`--._ __.--'// : | | \ `'\\ /` .'/ | ; : `. `~~~~` _.'.' ' ; \ . `-._ _____.'.-' / \ . . `'~~~~~'` . ' / `._ _._ '_._ _._' _.___.' `""` `"""` `""""` `"""` ========================================================= >-->FUN Places To Net Visit :) Maxine On Halloween! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/maxineonhalloween.html Ricochet And Jose http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/ricochetjose.html US Presidents And The Queen! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/queenofengland.html Dogs And Little ones http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/dogslittleones.html High Tech Toys http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/techtoys.html Day and Night! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/dayandnight.html Here's Your Frog! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/frog.htm Animal Moms! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/animalmoms.html Amazing Dog Houses! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/doghouses2.html Amazing Street-Legal Airplane! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/transition.html World's Best Husbands http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/husbands.html Kangaroos And Wallabies! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/kangaroos.html Kennel Club Dog Contest! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/kennelclubdog.html Lion And Tiger Sheep Herders! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/lionandtiger.html Sgt.Stubby War Dog Hero! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/stubbywardog.html Maxine On Jesus! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/maxineonjesus.html FALL/HALLOWEEN INDEX! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/halloweenindex.html -<>- >From Our Friend LouiseAu :) 'Duo Transcend' Mary and Tyce Nielsen amaze at the Finals of America's Got Talent 2020 with their mind-blowing acrobatic performance. https://youtu.be/kVzDK2vMdbY Take a short break from your day to watch a blind cat playing fetch and more cool and interesting videos. I’m guessing that since the cat is blind, it has really good hearing and can detect where the paper ball is thrown. I do love that frog telling the bug to take a hike. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X8NXfguS7Lw See a trail runner in Utah have a close encounter of the scary kind with a mountain lion and more cool and interesting videos as you get your Daily Dose Of Internet. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gxoYFTixjBo Take a short break from your day to see the cutest kitten ever waiting for some coffee and more cool and interesting videos. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xN5wZtrpuo0 See a really cool video of a C-17A Globemaster from the Royal Australian Air Force flying low over Brisbane, Australia. The Royal Australian Air Force C-17A Globemaster was doing rehearsal runs for the Brisbane Festival Sunsuper Riverfire. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vrz30nRONqY --- ...WOW! Fun Ones! Thanks LouiseAu! ======================================================= '. `~~`~`~~^`~~`~^~^`~~`~~`~^~`. .` / `> ' . ' ". _ '-"` . ` ' . | . ' / .' ,'~^~^~^`^~~^`^~`~~~^~~~^; ' ' | DON'T TEXT AND FLY! .-' \ ` : ` . "|_ | | , | : | \ | " ` | \ | , : | | /~--,__ | ` , | \__,--~' ("-,_ |" ` | `, | / "-,_"-,|, _ , |__/ "-,| \\______/ \ |, | / _\___/ \ /| " \ \/\ || \ / | \ \,|| \ __.--~\ |` ` \__/ || ),_ `~--.__/ | , | :/ \ /-,_"-,_ __ \ | `, /=,'/ (' `-,_"-,/_ /~=,_ \_| | __/=/ | \ "-/-,//~=,_~=,_ / |` (__ / (' \ \_//_~=,_~=, / \\______// \ ) '=,_~=,_~= / ___/_ \ | .| `\__( ~=,_~ / | /\/ /" | _.( | ./ / | __ _.-"_.-\ /|_ \__/ ' '| _.=~\ _\.-"_.-' `) \ \: | . | _.=~_.=~\\.-\-" / `.=\ .' | .=~_.=~_\\_/ / | \=\__ | | =~_.=~_.=` ( `) \ __) '| ~_.=~ )__/'| ' " '| | . " | ' .| '-"_'"-'_"'-_'"-_''_"-"-_"-\ \/' ' . '`\/"/- '"-_-"'_ _-"'__-"'_ -_ --"-"_jgs_""-_'"--"'_-"-'\\/.\\' / /"".\,//\//'-"-_'"-"'_'"-"''"-"'_ -"-'_-"_-"-_"-"'_'-"-"_``"-`"_`'""-`''""'-_'"-"-_"'"- '"- _'"- _ >-->Quotes & Thunkers: "According to a new study, men are naturally programmed to want more than one woman even when in monogamous relation- ships. And the scientists who conducted the study want to know if they can crash on your couch for a while." -Seth Meyers "The NYPD is apparently teaching its officers how to be more polite. It's true last time I got frisked, the cop was like, 'Have you lost weight?'" -Jimmy Fallon "The TSA is cracking down on the so-called comfort animals, the ones people bring on the plane because they claim to be too nervous to fly alone. The airlines have had enough and they only want trained service animals to be allowed on the planes. I don't blame them. Have you been on an airplane recently? It's like a Noah's Ark of Chihuahuas and Maltipoos. If you're so emotionally unstable that you need to hold a poodle to get on a plane, maybe you shouldn't get on a plane." -Jimmy Kimmel "A new study finds that having acne could be a good thing because it protects your skin from aging. And then teenagers were like, 'Right now it just feels like it's protecting me from girls.'" -Jimmy Fallon "Over the weekend, a 102-year-old woman got herself arrested so she could check that off of her bucket list. Now, it all seems like a cute story until you learn that the arrest was for triple homicide." -Conan O'Brien "Paris Hilton just bought an $8,000 Chihuahua. The dog weighs 12 ounces. I've eaten hot dogs that weigh more than 12 ounces. That's not even officially a dog, that's a hamster; she spent eight grand on a hamster." -Jimmy Kimmel "Medical marijuana users are now lobbying for the right to carry firearms. Because no one is a better shot than a stoned old man with glaucoma." -Conan O'Brien "A new study found that dogs can actually feel genuine love for their owners. While cats just keep a journal of all the things they hate about you." -Jimmy Fallon "China has overtaken the United States as the world's biggest food and grocery market. That means they buy and consume more food than we do. Which when you think about it of course they do. A half hour after they eat, they're hungry again. It's Chinese food." -Jimmy Kimmel >Updated FUN STUFF URLS - Oh Yeah Shangy! ---------------------------------------------------------------------- http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/urls.html FUN URLS ---------------------------------------------------------------------- -->ShangyFunList AD RATES: $20 will get your a message (of up to 40 words) out to all self-subscribed readers and $5 more will give you the same message also put up for all web site readers. Email me to secure dates. Ad Request ---------------------------------------------------------------------- -->FULL LENGTH - FREE On line AUDIO MP3 Christian Foundational Class http://www.truthortradition.com/modules.php?name=News&file=article&sid=61 NEW LIFE IN CHRIST! ---------------------------------------------------------------------- -->This is for all you who love food and DARE to make it at home Yep. You guessed it - Recipes. These are Tried and True, Yummy to the Tummy, good old fashioned home cooking recipes that are EASY to do Visit Shangy's Easy-Does-It Home Recipes: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/easy.html Home Recipes >Got A good Recipe? SHARE IT HERE: Share A Recipe ********************************************************************** >TO SUBSCRIBE:Visit Here This Weeks regular Shangy emails OR For the Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com **********************************************************************