Happy Frankenstein Day And Halloween! ... :) Shangy! >Here are the details on our Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com To UnSubscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com Group home page: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ShangyFunList or Web Site: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/ShangyFunList.html Group email address: ShangyFunList@yahoogroups.com or email me here: bcrsystems@earthlink.net ================ >-->OoooWEeeee!! oo 8 "} > @ < .8 .-._/| .'_'`')`_.' \| ) / (>'/ |_,_ | (,| .' ,'\| `._/ ) \| '`- -- ''-- --- VK/ejm I'm doing a 'Happy Angel' dance! Why? Because Shangrala has been blessed with another donation from our long time Shangrala Angel, Cloie from NH! May God Bless her abundantly! She is a loyal supporter contributing to help Keep Shangrala Alive! We sure do thank God for her and all our past most sweet and wonderful angels! If you'd like to help too and be counted as a Shangrala Angel, please visit the site and click on the donate button. A Secure PAYPAL page comes up. NOTE: Paypal will generate a 'Quantity 1' and 'Price per item' form. Just ignore the price per item and put whatever it is you desire to give in there. With Paypal, you will have your normal receipt for your 'payment' donation in USD (United States Dollars). You can put a memo in there if you'd like. EVERY LITTLE BIT WILL HELP! Any amount is greatly appreciated and needed! PLEASE Visit Shangrala to Help: http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/index.html OR If you'd rather send us a donation, Please MAIL it here: Elrhea Bigham 502 S. Harrison Van Wert, OH 45891 *~* THANK YOU! MAY GOD BLESS YOU MOST ABUNDANTLY FOR YOUR GIFT! ================ *~* A REMINDER: PLEASE Send me sweet, interesting, funny, inspiring, family type forwards ANY TIME here... bcrsystems@earthlink.net I Need them, Love them, Use them, and Share them! THANK YOU!! AND For Facebook Users: Please Friend Me / Like Me here... http://tinyurl.com/cma6all AND For Google Plus Users: You can find me here... Shangy Bigham https://plus.google.com/106648555948034085752/posts AND Please Share This email with All Your Friends And Family! ^~^ May God SUPER BLESS You As You Do! THANK YOU! :) -<>- * NOTE: An easy way to adjust the size of print in email or any page is to hold down the Ctrl tab while moving the scroll button on the mouse. You can also use the keyboard to change the font size in your web browser or emails. Hold down the Ctrl key while pressing the + key for larger text or the - key for smaller text! ================ *~* Our Hearts And Prayers go out to all affected by the shooting at the Synagogue massacre. May God uplift and bless them in the name of Jesus Christ our Lord. Anyone who chooses to go into a place of worship and kill as many innocent people there like he did is nothing but committing an act of pure evil and cowardice. No excuse for him except to say the devil was in control of him through his hatred. -<>- >-->HOT Off The 'Shangy' Press :) This flaming hot new page is from our friend Bunni. If you are like me and had no idea so many of these type of creatures existed, it will amaze you. I especially like the glass frogs - no need to dissect one when you can already see everything! Teehee. Check this cool one out here: _ _ __ ___.--'_`. .'_`--.___ __ ( _`.'. - 'o` ) ( 'o` - .`.'_ ) _\.'_' _.-' `-._ `_`./_ ( \`. ) //\` '/\\ ( .'/ ) \_`-'`---'\\__, ,__//`---'`-'_/ \` `-\ /-' '/ ` ' VK Transparent Critters! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/transparent.html ======================================================= >-->From SmileZilla: ______ ______ _/ Y \_ // ~~ ~~ | ~~ ~ \\ // ~ ~ ~~ | ~~~ ~~ \\ Original Unknown //________.|.________\\ Diddled by David Issel `----------`-'----------' >NEW DICTIONARY ADULT: A person who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the middle. BEAUTY PARLOR: A place where women curl up and dye. CANNIBAL: Someone who is fed up with people. CHICKENS: One of the only animals you eat before they are born and after they are dead. COMMITTEE: A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours. DUST: Mud with the juice squeezed out. EGOTIST: Someone me-deep in conversation GOSSIP: A person who will never tell a lie if the truth will do more damage. HANDKERCHIEF: Cold Storage. INFLATION: Cutting money in half without damaging the paper. MYTH: A female moth. MOSQUITO: An insect that makes you like flies better. RAISIN: Grape with a sunburn. SECRET: Something you tell to one person at a time. SKELETON: A bunch of bones with the person scraped off. TOOTHACHE: The pain that drives you to extraction. TOMORROW: One of the greatest labor saving devices of today. YAWN: An honest opinion openly expressed. WRINKLES: Something other people have. You have character lines. ======================================================= +------------ BIZARRE HOLIDAYS ------------+ October 29 is Hermit Day and National Frankenstein Day October 30 is National Candy Corn Day and Mischief Night October 31 is Carve a Pumpkin Day, Halloween and Increase Your Psychic Powers Day November 1 is All Saint's Day, 1-2 Dios Los Muertos and Men Make Dinner Day November 2 is All Soul's Day, Deviled Egg Day, Look for Circles Day and Plan Your Epitaph Day November 3 is Book Lovers Day, Housewife's Day and Sandwich Day November 4 is King Tut Day ======================================================= >-->From GoodCleanFun: __ __ /_ _^^_ _\ _____|________|______ `=====.'""""""'.=====` / /a /a \ .-. | /\ | <" ) \ / / \ .`\, _'. \/\/\/ .'_ \ \_\ ./,' '-.\\'-------' \`------'/ '--""---'//.-' ###'.-'/________ \/""""\/ ________\'-.'### '/` \ : / `\` | | \ : | | \ \_____:_____ / [I=I=[_]I=I] / | \ / |_ \ / /\ \ / /##\ \ | ,/ ## \, | \ \ ## / / \ \ ## / / \ \##/ / jgs \ /\/\ / __,\_/X##X\_/.__ '.'/|\\XX//|\'.` '/'|.\##/,|`\' ## ## ## \ ## / / \ , \ \\##// , / /, /. ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ >Military Computer Officers at a military installation were being lectured about a new computer. The training officer said the computer was able to withstand nuclear and chemical attacks. Suddenly, he saw that one of the officers had a cup of coffee and yelled, "There will be no eating or drinking in this room! You'll have to get rid of that coffee." The officer said meekly, "Sure, but why?" "Because a coffee spill could ruin the keyboard." -<>- >Proverbs A first grade teacher collected well known proverbs. She gave each child in the class the first half of the proverb, and asked them to complete each one. Here is what the kids came up with: Better to be safe than.................punch a 5th grader Strike while the.........................bug is close. It's always darkest before..............daylight savings time Never underestimate the power of............termites. You can lead a horse to water but ...........how? Don't bite the hand that.......................looks dirty. A miss is as good as a........................Mr. You can't teach an old dog.....................math. If you lie down with dogs, you........will stink in the morning. Love all, trust........................me. The pen is mightier than......................the pigs. An idle mind is......................the best way to relax. Where there is smoke, there's..............pollution. Happy is the bride who..................gets all the presents. A penny saved is.........................not much. Two is company, three's.....................The Musketeers. Children should be seen and not..........spanked or grounded. If at first you don't succeed.................get new batteries. You get out of something what you.......see pictured on the box. When the blind lead the blind................get out of the way. Laugh and the whole world laughs with you. Cry and.......you have to blow your nose. -<>- >Personal Fitness Two women who had just met at a health spa were talking about their lifestyles and how they hope to stay healthy. One asked the other to detail her daily routine. "I eat moderately," she replied, "I exercise moderately, I drink moderately, and I live moderately." "Is there anything else you do?" her new friend asked. "Yes," she said, "I lie extensively." -<>- College Book Store I'd been working on my business degree for about a year when I finally got to take a popular finance course. I went to the bookstore to buy the text and was shocked to find out that it would cost me $96. I asked how much it was worth if I sold it back at the end of the semester. "You'll get $24," said the clerk. "This is insane," I protested as I wrote out the check. "I know," replied the clerk sympathetically. "I've always thought that a person who buys a finance book for $96 and then sells it back for $24 should fail the course." -<>- >Remember Slow Food? Someone asked the other day, "What was your favorite fast food when you were growing up?" "We didn't have fast food when I was growing up," I informed him. "All the food was slow." "C'mon, seriously. Where did you eat?" "It was a place called 'at Home,' I explained. "Mom cooked every day and when Dad got home from work, we sat down together at the dining room table, and if I didn't like what mom put on my plate, I was allowed to sit there until I did like it." By this time, the kid was laughing so hard I was afraid he was going to suffer serious internal damage, so I didn't tell him the part about how I had to have permission to leave the table. But here are some other things I would have told him about my childhood if I figured his system could have handled it: Some parents NEVER owned their own house, never wore Levis, never set foot on a golf course, never traveled out of the country or had a credit card. My parents never drove me to soccer practice. This was mostly because we had never heard of soccer. I had a bicycle that weighed probably 50 pounds, and only had one speed (slow). We didn't have a television in our house until I was 11. It was, of course, black and white, and the station went off the air at midnight, after playing the national anthem; it came back on the air at about 6 a.m. And there was usually a locally produced news and farm show on, featuring local people. I was 19 before I tasted my first pizza, it was called "pizza pie." When I bit into it, I burned the roof of my mouth and the cheese slid off, swung down, plastered itself against my chin and burned that, too. It's still the best pizza I ever had. I never had a telephone in my room. The only phone in the house was in the living room and it was on a party line. Before you could dial, you had to listen and make sure some people you didn't know weren't already using the line. Pizzas were not delivered to our home, but milk was. All newspapers were delivered by boys. My brother delivered a newspaper, six days a week. It cost 7 cents a paper, of which he got to keep 2 cents. He had to get up at 6 AM every morning. On Saturday, he had to collect the 42 cents from his customers. His favorite customers were the ones who gave him 50 cents and told him to keep the change. His least favorite customers were the ones who seemed to never be home on collection day. Movie stars kissed with their mouths shut. At least, they did in the movies. There were no movie ratings because all movies were responsibly produced for everyone to enjoy viewing, without profanity or violence or most anything offensive. If you grew up in a generation before there was fast food, you may want to share some of these memories with your children or grandchildren -- Just don't blame me if they bust a gut laughing. Growing up isn't what it used to be, is it? MEMORIES from a friend: My Dad is cleaning out my grandmother's house (she died recently) and he brought me an old Royal Crown Cola bottle. In the bottle top was a stopper with a bunch of holes in it. I knew immediately what it was, but my daughter had no idea. She thought they had tried to make it a salt shaker or something. I knew it as the bottle that sat on the end of the ironing board to "sprinkle" clothes with because we didn't have steam irons. Man, I am old. How many do you remember? *Head lights dimmer switches on the floor. *Ignition switches on the dashboard.* *Heaters mounted on the inside of the fire wall. *Real ice boxes. *Pant leg clips for bicycles without chain guards. *Soldering irons you heat on a gas burner. *Using hand signals for cars without turn signals. Older Than Dirt Quiz : Count all the ones that you remember not the ones you were told about. Ratings at the bottom. 1. Blackjack chewing gum 2. Wax Coke-shaped bottles with colored sugar water 3. Candy cigarettes 4. Soda pop machines that dispensed glass bottles 5. Coffee shops or diners with table side jukeboxes 6. Home milk delivery in glass bottles with cardboard stoppers 7. Party lines on the telephone 8. Newsreels before the movie 9. P.F. Flyers 10. Butch wax 11. TV test patterns that came on at night after the last show and were there until TV shows started again in the morning. (there were only 3 channels ... if you were fortunate) 12. Peashooters 13. Howdy Doody 14. 45 RPM records 15. S&H Green stamps (or Blue Chip stamps) 16. Hi-fi's 17. Metal ice trays with levers 18. Mimeograph paper 19. Blue flashbulb 20. Packards 21. Roller skate keys 22. Cork popguns 23. Drive-ins 24. Studebakers 25. Wash tub wringers *If you remembered 0-5 = You're still young. If you remembered 6-10 = You are getting older If you remembered 11-15 = Don't tell your age 16-25 = You' re older than dirt!* *I might be older than dirt but those memories are some of the best parts of my life. *Don't forget to pass this along!!Especially to all your really good **O**L**D** FRIENDS* ========================================================= I LOOVEEEE IIIIT... ..... C C / /< / ___ __________/_#__=o /(- /(\_\________ \ \ ) \ )_ \o \ /|\ /|\ |' | | _| /o __\ / ' | / / | /_/\______| ( _( < \ \ \ \ \ | \____\____\ ____\_\__\_\ /` /` o\ |___ |_______|.. . b'ger >-->Happy Frankenstein Day And Halloween! >A monster collection of Frankenstein jokes for you! Q: How does Frankenstein eat his dinner? A: He bolts it down! Q: What kind of book did Frankenstein’s monster like to read? A: One with a cemetery plot! Q: How does Frankenstein sit in his chair? A: Bolt upright! Q: Why did Frankenstein tiptoe past the medicine cabinet? A: He didn’t want to wake the sleeping pills! Q: Why did Frankenstein the monster give up boxing? A: Because he didn’t want to spoil his looks! Q: What did Frankenstein’s monster say when he was struck by lightning? A: Thanks, I needed that. Q: How does Frankenstein jump start his day? A: With a shock of lighting! Q: What did one of Frankenstein’s ears say to the other? A: I didn’t know we lived on the same block! Q: How do you know Frankenstein is tired? A: He’s dead on his feet! Q: What happened to Frankenstein’s monster on the road? A: He was stopped for speeding, fined $150 and dismantled for three months! Q: What should you do if you find yourself in the same room as Frankenstein? A: Keep your fingers crossed that it’s a fancy dress party! Q: Who brings the monsters their babies? A: Frankenstork! Q: Why did Frankenstein go to a psychiatrist? A: He thought one of his screws was loose! Q: What did Frankenstein get when he put his goldfish’s brain in the body of his dog? A: I don’t know, but it is great at chasing submarines! Q: How can I stop Frankenstein charging every time is out? A: Why not take away his credit card? Q: What did Frankenstein say when he was struck by lightning? A: Great! A jolt to the bolt! Q: What do you call a clever monster? A: Frank Einstein! Q: Someone told me Frankenstein invented the safety match. A: Yes, that was one of his most striking achievements! Q: What happened when the ice monster had a furious row with Frankenstein? A: He gave him the cold shoulder! Q: How did Dr Frankenstein pay the men who built his monster? A: On a piece rate! Q: Why is Frankenstein such good fun? A: Because he soon has you in stitches! Q: Who did Frankenstein take to the prom? A: His new dead ghoul friend! Q: Where does the bride of Frankenstein have her hair done? A: At the ugly parlor! Q: Why was the bride of Frankenstein a terrible liar? A: You can always read between the lines on her forehead! Q: What was the inscription on the tomb of Frankenstein’s monster? A: HERE LIES FRANKENSTEIN’S MONSTER. MAY HE REST IN PIECES! Q: Why was Frankenstein never lonely? A: Because he was good at bringing different parts of friends together! Q: What did the Frankenstein’s friend say when he introduced him to his girlfriend? A: Good grief! Where did you dig her up from? Q: Why was there a spark between Frankenstein and his bride? A: He couldn’t resistor! Q: Why does Frankenstein’s Monster Frankenfurters have a long shelf life? A: Because they have no expiration date. They are already dead. Q: Who will Frankenstein’s Monster take to the dance? A: Oh, any old girl he can dig up! Q: Why is online dating perfect for Frankenstein the Monster? A: Because he can hide behind a fake profile picture! Q: Why does Frankenstein’s Monster love Facebook? A: Because he wants friennnds!!! Q: Why did Frankenstein squeeze his girlfriend to death? A: He had a crush on her! Q: What did Frankenstein say to his sweetheart? A: It was love at first fright! Q: What’s Frankenstein’s Monster’s favorite word? A: Synergy. Because he’s greater than the sum of his spare parts! Q: Why was Frankenstein built taller than the average guy? A: So people did not see him as just another zombie! Q: Why was Frankenstein green? A: He was made from old dead green body parts! Q: Why did Microsoft buy Frankenstein? A: They where looking for a new mobile hardware platform! Q: What is Frankenstein’s favorite dance song? A: The monster mash! Q: Why did the doctor create Frankenstein? A: He was looking for a green form of transport! Q: Why was Frankenstein always being arrested? A: He was so easy to charge! Q: How did Frankenstein stay so firm and fit? A: He bolts about 20 miles a day! Q: Why did Frankenstein turn to solar? A: For the free charge! Q: Why does Frankenstein love Halloween? A: He gets to eat his favorite treat nuts and bolts! Q: Why does Frankenstein hate flying in America? A: His bolts always set off the alarms at the airports! Q: How much did little Frankenstein win the running race by? A Frankfoot! Q: Why did Frankenstein take up professional surfing? A: He was sponsored by lighting bolt surf wear company! More Here: http://halloweenjokes.com/halloween-jokes/frankenstein-jokes ========================================================= >-->From Our Friend LouiseAu :) __ __ | |_| |______ _,___ _,___ _ _ \--/ | _ |__ | __ | __ | |_| | /`-' '-`\ |__| |__|__-_,_| ,___| ,___|___, | / \ |_| |_| |_| /.'|/\ /\|'.\ __ __ _ _ \/ | |_| |______| | |______ __ _ __ ______ ______ _,____ | _ |__ | | | __ | | | | --__| --__| __ \ |__| |__|__-_,_|_|_|______|_______|______|______|_| |_| ,-"-._ _.-"-, )'. `-. _,,,_ .-` .'( | `'. `-"` `"-` .'` | \ .-' '-. / _ .' .--. .--. '. '-(-' _ / (.=.| |.=.) \ _ . '._(_) : \_o/ .-. \_o/ : ( )_.' \ : ( ) :.-' ,-''-.; .___ .-`Y`-. ___. ;_.'-, \ '-.\ \ .--( .'. )--. / _./_| '._.-'`'-., _;-'\_/'-;_ ,.-'`'._`/ jgs_.',_.-' / `'''` `.___.' `'''` \ '-.__`-, '. -'/_.-| ; ; | \ _/ ';'` \ / \ /'---', / . '._,__,_,' ',_,__,_,' \ / . .'\ .'\ : \ ; \\\ \\\ ; | : /'._.' \\ /'._.' \\ ' | | ( ______/ ) ( ______/ ) | | : `~~~~~~~` .-. `~~~~~~~` : | | : / `\\ : | | _, ( __/ ) _, : | | : \ : `~~~` : .' | | `-._ _,' | | . \`--._ __.--'// : | | \ `'\\ /` .'/ | ; : `. `~~~~` _.'.' ' ; \ . `-._ _____.'.-' / \ . . `'~~~~~'` . ' / `._ _._ '_._ _._' _.___.' `""` `"""` `""""` `"""` >An Oldie... An airplane was about to crash, and there were 5 passengers left, but only 4 parachutes. The first passenger, Barack Obama said, "I am President of the United States, and I have a great responsibility, being the leader of nearly 300 million people, and a superpower, etc. I am also the smartest president ever." So he takes the first parachute, and jumps out of the plane. The second passenger, said, I'm Antoine Walker, one of the best NBA Basketball players, and the Boston Celtics need me, so I can't afford to die." So he takes the second parachute, and leaves the plane. The third passenger, Hillary Clinton, said "I am the wife of the former President of the United States, and a New York Senator, and I am the smartest woman in the world." So she takes the third parachute and exits the plane. The fourth passenger, the Old man, says to the fifth passenger, a 10 year old boy scout, "I am old and frail and I don't have many years left, so as a Christian gesture and a good deed, I will sacrifice my life and let you have the last parachute. "The boy scout said, "It's OK, there's a parachute left for you. The world's smartest woman senator took my backpack." ------- Mrs. Santa Claus was seeking a divorce in court from an incredulous judge who asked her to explain her marital problems. "Judge, it's that happy jolly stuff all year long," she said. "It drives me CRAZY!" "All year? Why I thought Santa's work was only in the winter." said the judge. "Sure, but in summer he takes up gardening," Mrs. Claus replied, and then... it's hoe, hoe, hoe, all over again!" ---------- Two guys are out hunting, and as they are walking along they came upon a huge hole in the ground. They approach it and are amazed at the size of it. The first hunter says, "Wow, that's some hole; I can't even see the bottom. I wonder how deep it is?" The second hunter says," I don't know. Let's throw something down there, listen and see how long it takes to hit bottom." The first hunter says, "Hey, there's an old automobile transmission over there. Give me a hand, we'll throw it in and see." So they pick it up and carry it over and count one, two, three and heave it in the hole. They are standing there listening, looking over the edge, when they hear a rustling behind them. As they turn around, they see a goat come crashing through the underbrush, run up to the hole and, without hesitation, jump in headfirst. While they are standing there staring at each other in amazement, trying to figure out what that was all about, an old farmer saunters up. "Say there," says the farmer, "You fellers didn't happen to see my goat around here anywhere, did you?" The first hunter says, "Funny you should ask, but we were just standing here a minute ago and a goat came running out of the bushes doing about a hundred miles an hour and jumped headfirst into this here hole!!" The old farmer said, "Naw, that's impossible...I had him chained to a transmission. ---------- Two hunters, Paul and Kurt, were in a lodge, making small talk. Paul asked Kurt, "So, what do you hunt?" Kurt answered "I hunt unicorns." Paul was startled, but said "Really? How do you do that?" Kurt replied, "I find a virgin and hire her to help me. The virgin sits around in the woods until a unicorn comes to her. When it does, it sets off a snare." Paul said, "Boy, they must be hard to find. I've heard of them, but I've never seen one." Kurt said "Yeah, and there aren't many unicorns around, either!" ---------- For thirty years, Johnson had arrived at work at 9 A.M. on the dot. He had never missed a day and was never late. Consequently, when on one particular day 9 A.M. passed without Johnson's arrival, it caused a sensation. All work ceased and the boss himself, looking at his watch and muttering, came out into the corridor. Finally, precisely at ten, Johnson showed up, clothes dusty and torn, his face scratched and bruised, his glasses bent. He limped painfully to the time clock, punched in, and said, aware that all eyes were upon him, "What a morning. I tripped and rolled down two flights of stairs entering the subway. When I was on the ground two punks grabbed my wallet. I had to borrow subway fare from a stranger to get here." The boss raised an eyebrow and responded, "And this took an hour?" ------- A wild eyed woman walked into a crowded bar in downtown Washington, D.C. waving an un-holstered pistol and yelled out: "I have a .45 caliber Colt 1911, with a seven round magazine, plus one in the chamber. I want to know who's been sleeping with my husband?" A female voice from the back of the room called out: "You'll Need More Ammo, Mrs. Clinton." ------- I was talking to my dad yesterday. he's getting a little older and complaining about joint pain. I was worried and asked "Is it your hip?" He said no, "I burned my lip smoking pot." ---------- On a visit to my wife's native England for our honeymoon, we arrived at London's Gatwick Airport. Tania headed for the British passport control line while I, an American, waited in the foreigners' line. When my turn came, the customs officer asked me the purpose of my visit. "Pleasure," I replied. "I'm on my honeymoon." The officer looked first to one side of me, then the other. "That's very interesting, sir," he said as he stamped my passport. "Most men bring their wives with them." ---------- Three boys were heading home from school one day when one started the time-honored game of paternal one-upmanship. He said, "My dad's way faster than any of yours, he can throw a 90-mph fast ball from the pitcher's mound and run and catch it just after it crosses the plate!" One of the other boys said, "Oh yeah? Well, my dad can shoot an arrow from his bow and run to the target and hold it up to make sure the arrow hits the bulls eye!" The last boy said, "Your dads don't even come close to being faster than mine. My dad works for the government, and even though he works every day until 4:00 he gets home at 3:30!" ---------- The Wolf Man comes home one day from a long day at the office. "How was work, dear?" his wife asks. "Listen! I don't want to talk about work!" he shouts. "Okay. Would you like to sit down and eat a nice home cooked meal?" she asks nicely. "Listen!" he shouts again. "I'm not hungry! I don't wanna eat! All right! Is that all right with you? Can I come home from work and just do my own thing without you forcing food down my throat? Huh?" At this moment, the wolf man started growling and throwing things around the apartment in a mad rage. Looking out the window, his wife sees a full moon and says to herself, "Well, I guess it's that time of the month." --- ...LOL! What a howl! Thanks LouiseAu! ========================================================= _____ . . . . . _.-"" ""-._ !-!-!-!-! .' '. !_!_!_!_! .' '. |_=- =| / .-.. \ !_ ,;,-_]/ |__H _ .-\_)`-. \ ,/`,/'_`\,`\, [____|_] /.-. .-,_\ ; ,/',/'/_|_\`\,`\,|= |=| \( ; ,/' |/ ||"""|| \| `\, = | | ` | | #| ||___|| | # |= | | | ,/' # | [_____] | #`\, |=| ; ,/',-----' = '-----,`\--'---,/\,--, / `""| .;;;,= ,;;;, |# # ,// \\,'\, / | =//___\\ = //___\\ =| # ,//',;;,'\\,#\, | ||-. || || || |#,//' //||\\ '\\,`\, | ||..\|| || || |-|/| ||_||_|| |\|_ _| | || || = || || |= | |.----.|=|___] |= ||___|| = ||___|| =| =| || || | || | [_______] [_______] |--.| ||____|| | || ;_______=______=_____ __; |[________]| || ,/'# # # # # '----------''\| ,/' # # # # # # '\, ,/'___#____#__#_____#___#_______#_______#____#___#'\, `""[____________________________________________]|""` _[_| .-----. =- ___________ ||_]_|| | _| .",-"|"-,', () = |.--..-..--.| = |_ ||| |_/ |/ /_\_|_/_\ \ /__\ ||__||_||__|| | \_|\\ (_) || .-------. | | | |.--..-..--.| =| (_) || / \ || | | | |()| ||__||_||__|| | / \ || \_/ || '-------' | )( |___________| | \_/ || (_) ||.---------.| \/ |.---------.|= | (_) || / \ ||| ___ || = || || | / \ || \_/ ||| {___} || || || | \_/ || (_) ||| ((_)) || -= =||_________|| = |_(_)_// / \ ||| '-' || _ .-'-----------'-. | / \__\ \_/_||| ()|| [_]"""""""""""""""""[_]\_/\\\\ [ __ ]|| || =| |==.==.==.==.==.==| |__]||||| j| |||| || | | | | | | | | | |====| g|__|||;). ||--|_|=='=='=='=='=='==|_| |||||| _s____/`---`\ ____||_.____._____._____.____.|__|//// | | 9.9 |=====' | | / \ \ | |-' '------\ www /---'----'----'---'----'---'---'----' `---' >-->From HandyHints: >Remove stains using potatoes...really! Potatoes are excellent stain removers and they can safely be used in a lot of ways around the house. Use them on your hands to remove the stains left behind by beets or berries or blot them into carpet or other fabrics to clean up stubborn spots. Add some salt for extra scrubbing power for particularly troublesome stains. >Clean silverware using potato water Want to clean up your fine silver without all of the chemical scrubbing? Boil a few potatoes in water until they're soft and ready to eat. Set the potatoes aside (for dinner, perhaps?) and place the silverware in the potato water. Allow it to sit for at least an hour. Remove the silver and wipe dry to remove the tarnish. >Freezer trick: freeze things flat and stack them. Whether it's soups, stews, or ground meat, the flatter and wider you can get them, the faster they'll freeze and defrost, which not only makes you more efficient, it also improves the quality of the food (the longer something takes to freeze, the more cellular damage it will suffer). >Freezing raw meat, soups, and stews: if you have a vacuum sealer, use it! Otherwise, place foods in heavy-duty freezer bags, squeeze out all the air, lay the bag flat, and use your hands to