Happy May Day! ... :) Shangy! >Here are the details on our Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com To UnSubscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com Group home page: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ShangyFunList or Web Site: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/ShangyFunList.html Group email address: ShangyFunList@yahoogroups.com or email me here: bcrsystems@earthlink.net ================ *~* Please Consider Giving To ShangralaFamilyFun.com The cost of the website has gone up dramatically due to the ever increasingly wonderful pages and photos being added each week to entertain you and our fellow Christian families. While the ads on the website do help, I don't want to drag the site down with tons of them to pay for it. I need your help! "We are each of us angels with but one wing, and can only fly by embracing each other" -Luciano Decrescenzo ~ CALLING ALL CARING ANGELS ~ *~* WE NEED CARING And SHARING Angels *~* ,_ :`. .--._ `.`-. / ',-""""' `. ``~-._.'_."/ `~-._ .` `~; ;. / / / jgs ,_.-';_,.'` `"-;`/ ,'` >Do You Want To Be A Shangrala Angel? If you'd like to help and be counted as a Shangrala Angel, the easiest way to do that is through online giving. It is easy to use, and most of all, it is secure. Please visit the site, scroll down and click on the donate button. A Secure PAYPAL form page comes up. NOTE: Paypal will generate a 'Quantity 1' and 'Price per item' form. Just ignore the price per item and put whatever it is you desire to give in there. With Paypal, you will have your normal receipt for your 'payment' donation in USD (United States Dollars). You can put a memo in there if you'd like. EVERY LITTLE BIT WILL HELP! Any amount is greatly appreciated and needed! PLEASE Visit Shangrala to Help: http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/index.html OR If you'd rather send us a donation, Please MAIL it here: Elrhea Bigham 502 S. Harrison Van Wert, OH 45891 *~* THANK YOU! MAY GOD BLESS YOU MOST ABUNDANTLY FOR YOUR GIFT! ================ * NOTE: An easy way to adjust the size of print in email or any page is to hold down the Ctrl tab while moving the scroll button on the mouse. You can also use the keyboard to change the font size in your web browser or emails. Hold down the Ctrl key while pressing the + key for larger text or the - key for smaller text! ================ >-->HOT Off The 'Shangy' Press :) This red hot new page is from our friends Geniann and Linda. It's sure to give you plenty of smiles and perhaps a few hearty laughs for your day. Check this one out here... . \ | / _\|/_ .' ' ' '. ___ _.|.--.--.|.___.--'___`-. .'.'|| | ||`----'"` ``'` .'.' ||()|()|| .___..-'.' / \ `----'"` / .-. \ (.'.(___).'.) `.__.-.__.' jgs |_| |_| `.`-'.' `"` Morons At Work 5 http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/mwork5.html --- ...I get a kick out of this series! Thanks Ladies! -<>- *~* We Had A Spectacular Month Of Sharing And Caring Last Month! _..---.._ .' .-'''-. '. / .' _..._'. \ __ : : /`;' ) : : _,="`\ ,--''` ``'.; : |; ,-; : ; __..==""==.,_| `-, `; .\; / ^\ _,.="// '-,_.--._ '.(;_.'__/`_.-'`\ ,.--''`` _..=. `'--.// `` \ `--, '` `- |_\ '-. | `-._ _.;--`-..___,.-'` `'-...-_:',;`==,| \ _.--',=" / /"=;="=, _.' ,=".-'` .' /| ,=" _.--' .-' "=, : .' | ", `;._ .--'.' .-' .' . ; ,;;\_ . '._.'--'` -' / ,;;;._ '-._ .''.__.' `\_ .' '._ / '._ .(` jgs '._ ';./ `;` ~I Am Pleased To Announce That We Had A Donation For Shangrala~ * Florence (Cloie) L. from NH Praise God! Cloie again stepped up and gave a donation in April to help keep Shangrala Alive! She is indeed Our Sweet Angel! May God Bless Her Through Jesus Christ For Her Giving Heart! *~* Please Visit And Share All Of Our Newest Web Pages :) Old Stars And Their Cars! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/starscars.html Humor With Cooking! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/bookpaperart2.html Amazing Light Pillars! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/lightpillars.html Garage Door Art 2! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/garageart2.html Important Life Truths! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/lifetruths.html Through Daredevil Eyes! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/daredevil.html Metro Museum Of Art! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/metmuseumart.html Metro Museum Of Art 2! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/metmuseumart2.html Longest Glass Bridge! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/glassbridge.html Revenge Parking! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/revengeparking.html *~* May God Bless All Our Sweet Contributors! They Give Us A Bit Of The 'Spice Of Life' With Their Kind Forwards And Links! :) ======================================================= >-->Happy May Day! _o_o__o_o_ / /| |\ \ / / /| |\ \ \ / / / | | | \ \ / / / | | \ \ \ / / / | | \ \ \ / / / | | \ \ \ / / / | | | \ \ / / / | | \ \ \ | | \ | | \ | \ | \ \ | | | \ | / | \ | | / / / | \ | | | \ | | \ / \ | | | / \ / \ | | | / \ / \ | / | | | / | / | \ | | \ \ | | | |_o_ | | / | \ / \ | | | _o_\ _o_/ _o_| \_o_ /_o_ > > | | | /_\ /_\ | /_\ < < < < | | / \ | | Carl Erik Heiberg The Maypole The Maypole is certainly a symbol of courtship, and in many celebrations, of fertility. On constant theme is a dance with one or more virgin girls at the center of the rituals. My favorite celebrations is where the girls hold white ribbons, and dance clockwise, whereas the boys have red ribbons and dance counter-clockwise. -<>- Morris Dancing Although Morris Dancing is practiced at other times of year it has a special place in May Day celebrations. The ancient Morris Dance is of Moorish origin, in this ritual the May-pole represents the May Queen and the man on the hobby-horse represents the Moorish King. Other participants in the traditional Morris Dance are the Fool, the Lesser Fool, the Franklin (Gentleman), the Spaniard and a Friar. As they dance so the Morris Men make music with bells on the legs and also by banging sticks with fellow Morris Men. -<>- Jack-in-the-Green (The Green Man) The origin of Jack-in-the-Green can be traced to May Day celebrations in general, and chimney sweeps in particular. There is even a suspicion that Jack-in-the-Green goes back to the Normans and the Bayeux tapestry. Jack-in-the-Green has obvious associations with Robin Hood, and became a central character in 16th Century English May Day celebrations. About 1830 the chimney sweeps took Jack-in-the-Green as their mascot for their May Day parades. These sweeps made Jack-in-the-Green one of the most noticeable and feared characters in May Day parades. However, by late Victorian times chimney sweeps were in decline and moreover, the May Day celebrations became more sedate, for these and other changes in fashion, Jack-in-the-Green died out, until he was resurrected in Whitstable, Kent in 1976, and then in Hastings, by the Mad Jacks Morris Dancers in 1983. -<>- Two yokels were driving to the next village's May Day Fair. They came to a sign that said: May Day Fair Left. ... so they turned around and went home! -<>- A townie was looking for the May Day Fair, he stopped and asked Jethro. 'Will this road take me to the May Day Fair?' 'Oh no,' said Jethro. 'You'll have to go by yourself!' -<>- Freddie was looking at the animals section at the May Fair when a dirty, scruffy man came running in the opposite direction. He stopped and asked Freddie, 'Have you seen a cart load of pigs go this way?' 'No', said Freddie, 'Why did you fall off?' -<>- Norman decides to take a balloon ride on offer at the local May Day Fair. The balloon and its customers drift along in the breeze, but eventually they are lost. Norman has no idea where he is, so when the gondolier takes the basket down to ten feet above ground he calls to a passer-by: 'Excuse me, sir, can you tell me where I am?' After looking Norman up and down, the passer-by says: 'You are in a red balloon, ten feet above ground.' The balloon's unhappy resident replied, 'You must be a lawyer' 'How could you possible know that?' asked the passer-by. 'Because your answer is technically correct but absolutely useless, and the fact is I am still lost'. 'Then you must be in management', said the passer-by. 'That's right! How did you know?' 'You have such a good view from where you are, and yet you don't know where you are and you don't know where you are going. The fact is you are in the exact same position you were in before we met, but now your problem is somehow my fault!' ======================================================= +------------ BIZARRE HOLIDAYS ------------+ May 1 is May Day, Loyalty Day, Mother Goose Day and Save the Rhino Day May 2 is Baby Day and Brothers and Sisters Day May 3 is Lumpy Rug Day and World Press Freedom Day May 4 is Bird Day, National Candied Orange Peel Day, Renewal Day and Star Wars Day May 5 is Cinco de Mayo, International Tuba Day, National Hoagie Day, Oyster Day and Space Day May 6 is Beverage Day, Free Comic Book Day, National Tourist Appreciation Day, National Nurses Day and No Diet Day May 7 is National Tourism Day ======================================================= >-->From GoodCleanFun: .---. ___ /_____\ /\.-`( '.' ) / / \_-_/_ \ `-.-"`'V'//-. `.__, |// , \ |Ll //Ll|\ \ |__// | \_\ /---|[]==| / / \__/ | \/\/ /_ | Ll_\| |`^"""^`| | | | | | | | | | | | | L___l___J jgs |_ | _| (___|___) ^^^ ^^^ >Post-Op Our patient in the hospital was a big, burly former military officer. Just after surgery, and still half out of it, he became agitated and confused, tearing at his IVs and trying to escape his bed. The nurses gamely attempted to keep him calm but were losing this battle. That's when my old military training came into play. "Colonel!" I commanded. "AT EASE." And with that, the colonel fell back to sleep. -<>- >Training Session At a training session in the fire station, the team was assembled around the kitchen table. The training officer was discussing the behavior of fire: "You pull up to a house and notice puffs of smoke coming from the eaves, blackened out windows and little or no visible flame. What does this tell you?" he asked. Expecting to hear that the house is in a possible back draft situation, a condition very dangerous to fire fighters, he instead heard from one quick wit, "You found the right place." -<>- >Gym Membership Everyone vows to join a gym and go three days a week. Yeah, right. A woman once called me at the health club where I used to work. "I got a note saying it was time for me to renew my membership," she said. "As much as I love to work out, I don't think I'll renew." "Fine," I said, "but you'll have to come down here to fill out cancellation forms." After a long pause - "Umm, where are you located?" -<>- >Impossibilities in the World 1) You can't count your hair. (even those who are bald have arm and leg hair - etc;) 2) You can't wash your eyes with soap. 3) You can't breathe when your tongue is out. Put your tongue back in your mouth, you silly person. Ten Things I Know About You: 1) You are reading this. 2) You are human. 3) You can't say the letter "P" without separating your lips. 4) You just attempted to do it. 6) You are laughing at yourself. 7) You have a smile on your face, and you skipped No. 5. 8) You just checked to see if there is a No. 5. 9) You laugh at this because you are a fun-loving person and everyone does it, too. 10) You are probably going to forward this to see who else falls for it. "Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many." -<>- >Fine Print The instructions and fine print in the manual for my new electronic humidity sensor intimidated me, so I delayed setting it up. Once I finally began, my fear was eliminated when I read the fifth hint in the four-page instruction manual, which stated: "Under no circumstances should you let it get to you! It's only a computer- like device and you cannot screw it up unless you throw it out the window, in which case it will not be under warranty!" ========================================================= >-->From Our Friend LouiseA :) .-. .' ... `. / ,'.. /. \ |o ' /` o| |88o.d8b.o88| \888ooo888/ |`-----'| | | | | | jgs/VK | |(/)| | a:f | |[_]| | `-.___.-' | | | | | | | | | | | | >SMILES John was driving down the street in a sweat because he had an important meeting and couldn't find a parking place. Looking up toward heaven, he said, "Lord, take pity on me. If you find me a parking place I will go to church every Sunday for the rest of my life and give up beer." Just then a parking place miraculously appeared! John looked up again and said, "Never mind. I found one!" ---------- Father to his six-year-old-son: "Words are very important. When you talk to our neighbors, just say your aunt likes to crochet. Don't call her the happy hooker!" ------------ Ok, it's official. I'm getting old. The other day I was walking back to my car from the grocery store. Coming into the store was this smoking hot 19, maybe 20 year old, blonde. Gee, she was hot. My thought? "I wonder what her mother looks like. ---------- An European, Australian and Asian guy went for a hike one day. It was very hot. When they came upon a small lake, they took off all their clothes and jumped into the water, since it was fairly secluded. Feeling refreshed, the trio decided to pick a few berries while enjoying their "freedom." As they were crossing an open area, suddenly a group of ladies from town appeared. Unable to get to their clothes in time, the European and the Australian quickly used their hands to cover their privates. But the Asian covered his face while they ran for cover. After the ladies had left and the men got their clothes back on. The European and the Australian asked the Asian why he covered his face rather than his privates. The Asian replied, "I don't know about you, but where I come from, it's the face that people recognize." ---------- A couple of hunters are out in the woods, when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn't seem to be breathing. His eyes are rolled back in his head. The other guy whips out his mobile phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator, in a calm, soothing voice, answers, "Just take it easy. First, let's make sure he's dead." There's silence, then a shot is heard. The guy's voice comes back on the line. He asks, "Okay, now what?" ---------- The company I work for has always had problems with interoffice communications. For instance, last week the Personnel Department sent around a memo on s#@ual harassment. Three people initialed it and six people signed up for it. ---------- A social worker was interviewing prisoners to gauge the effect of violence seen on TV carrying over to real life. One prisoner explained that he was only allowed to watch TV during the day, then locked in his cell at night because of his misconduct. "Well..." said the social worker, "while you are missing the best shows, at least it's nice that you can see daytime TV." "Nice ?!?!?" the prisoner exclaimed. "Lady, that's part of the punishment. ---------- A woman went into a hardware store to purchase a bale of peat moss. She gave a personal check in payment and said to the clerk, "I suppose you will want some identification." He replied, without hesitation, "No ma'am, that won't be necessary." "How come?" asked the woman. "Crooks don't buy peat moss." answered the clerk. ---------- Grandpa was always going on about the good old days, and the lower cost of living, in particular. "When I was a kid, my mom could send me to the store, and I'd get a salami, two pints of milk, 6 oranges, 2 loaves o' bread, a magazine, and some new blue jeans...all for a dollar!!" Then Grandpa said sadly, "You can't DO that anymore.....they got those video cameras everywhere you look." ---------- A Navy officer was cutting through the crew's quarters of his ship one day and happened upon a sailor reading a magazine, with his feet up on the small table in front of him. "Sailor! Do you put your feet up on the furniture at home?" the officer demanded. "No, sir," he responded, "but we don't land airplanes on the roof, either." ---------- A mother took her five-year-old son with her to the bank at a busy lunchtime. They got behind a very large woman wearing a business suit, complete with a pager. As they waited patiently, the little boy said loudly, "Gee, she's large!" The mother bent down and whispered in the little boy’s ear to be quiet. A couple of minutes passed by, and the little boy spread his hands as far as they would go and announced, "Her butt is this wide!" The large woman turns around and glares at the little boy. The mother gave him a good scolding, and told him to be quiet. After a brief lull, the large woman reached the front of the line. Just then, her pager began to emit a 'beep, beep, beep.' The little boy yells out, "Run for your life! She’s backing up!" ---------- The man looked a little worried when the doctor came in to administer his annual physical, so the first thing the doctor asked him was whether anything was troubling him. "Well, to tell the truth, Doc, yes," answered the patient. "You see, I seem to be getting forgetful. No, it's actually worse than that. I'm never sure I can remember where I put the car, or whether I answered a letter, or where I´m going, or what it is I'm going to do once I get there -- if I get there. So, I really need your help. What can I do?" The doctor mused for a moment, then answered in his kindest tones, "Pay me in advance." ------- ___ ===O. ,`\|/`. "|--+--| | "'./|\,' |-"---| _| [_] |) ()| .< >|) ~|< >_]|) | [_] |_) '=====' gpyy >FOR THOSE WHO LOVE THE PHILOSOPHY OF AMBIGUITY, AS WELL AS THE IDIOSYNCRASIES OF ENGLISH: 1. ONE TEQUILA, TWO TEQUILA, THREE TEQUILA...... FLOOR. 2. ATHEISM IS A NON-PROPHET ORGANIZATION. 3. IF MAN EVOLVED FROM MONKEYS AND APES, WHY DO WE STILL HAVE MONKEYS AND APES? 4. THE MAIN REASON THAT SANTA IS SO JOLLY IS BECAUSE HE KNOWS WHERE ALL THE BAD GIRLS LIVE. 5. I WENT TO A BOOKSTORE AND ASKED THE SALESWOMAN, “WHERE’S THE SELF-HELP SECTION?” SHE SAID IF SHE TOLD ME, IT WOULD DEFEAT THE PURPOSE. 6. WHAT IF THERE WERE NO HYPOTHETICAL QUESTIONS? 7. IF A DEAF CHILD SIGNS SWEAR WORDS, DOES HIS MOTHER WASH HIS HANDS WITH SOAP? 8. IF SOMEONE WITH MULTIPLE PERSONALITIES THREATENS TO KILL HIMSELF, IS IT CONSIDERED A HOSTAGE SITUATION? 9. IS THERE ANOTHER WORD FOR SYNONYM? 10. WHERE DO FOREST RANGERS GO TO “GET AWAY FROM IT ALL?” 11. WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN YOU SEE AN ENDANGERED ANIMAL EATING AN ENDANGERED PLANT? 12. IF A PARSLEY FARMER IS SUED, CAN THEY GARNISH HIS WAGES? 13. WOULD A FLY WITHOUT WINGS BE CALLED A WALK? 14. WHY DO THEY LOCK GAS STATION BATHROOMS? ARE THEY AFRAID SOMEONE WILL BREAK IN AND CLEAN THEM? 15. IF A TURTLE DOESN’T HAVE A SHELL, IS HE HOMELESS OR NAKED? 16. CAN VEGETARIANS EAT ANIMAL CRACKERS? 17. IF THE POLICE ARREST A MUTE, DO THEY TELL HIM HE HAS THE RIGHT TO REMAIN SILENT? 18. WHY DO THEY PUT BRAILLE ON THE DRIVE-THROUGH BANK MACHINES? 19. HOW DO THEY GET DEER TO CROSS THE ROAD ONLY AT THOSE YELLOW ROAD SIGNS? 20. WHAT WAS THE BEST THING BEFORE SLICED BREAD? 21. ONE NICE THING ABOUT EGOTISTS: THEY DON'T TALK ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE. 22. DOES THE LITTLE MERMAID WEAR AN ALGEBRA? 23. DO INFANTS ENJOY INFANCY AS MUCH AS ADULTS ENJOY ADULTERY? 24. HOW IS IT POSSIBLE TO HAVE A CIVIL WAR? 25. IF ONE SYNCHRONIZED SWIMMER DROWNS, DO THE REST DROWN TOO? 26. IF YOU ATE BOTH PASTA AND ANTIPASTO, WOULD YOU STILL BE HUNGRY? 27. IF YOU TRY TO FAIL, AND SUCCEED, WHICH HAVE YOU DONE? 28. WHOSE CRUEL IDEA WAS IT FOR THE WORD 'LISP' TO HAVE 'S' IN IT? 29. WHY ARE HEMORRHOIDS CALLED “HEMORRHOIDS” INSTEAD OF “ASSTEROIDS?” 30. WHY IS IT CALLED TOURIST SEASON IF WE CAN’T SHOOT AT THEM? 31. WHY IS THERE AN EXPIRATION DATE ON SOUR CREAM? 32. IF YOU SPIN AN ORIENTAL MAN IN A CIRCLE THREE TIMES, DOES HE BECOME DISORIENTED? 33. CAN AN ATHEIST GET INSURANCE AGAINST ACTS OF GOD? 34. WHY DO SHOPS HAVE SIGNS, “GUIDE DOGS ONLY,” THE DOGS CAN’T READ AND THEIR OWNERS ARE BLIND --- ...LMAO! Great Ones! Thanks LouiseAu! ========================================================= >-->From Our Friend Linda :) ,-`"-=') =/////// ,== _,_(((((-`6\ ==.| /,,...\\\C _| .--. ((((\\\\\` _, /;_| )9 )))))./ `. / } _\,_ ,-'))) \ / /=-. ,-./ \/ '))) . /\_/ / \ (,-.%\ / /-' ') \/\ / ( \ (/ \ ' /( ' `-/ \( \ ,- / ( `-' \ . / / \ \ &_) /\ \ | ( /--.- \ \----,------=;% | _/ _); `. ` `-. .`\ ) +++/ \ ,," %&-. ; \\| `-` `-=.;_,.__.__\_,/ )_/___+_/_________\,"(_//_(__)______:-._) gpyy >Seenager Life can't get better!!!! I just discovered my age group! I am a Seenager. (Senior teenager) I have everything that I wanted as a teenager, only 50-60 years later. I don't have to go to school or work I get an allowance every month. I have my own pad. I don't have a curfew. I have a driver's license and my own car. The people I hang around with are not scared of getting pregnant, they aren’t scared of anything, they have been blessed to live this long, why be scared? And I don't have acne. Life is Good! Also, you will feel much more intelligent after reading this, if you are a Seenager. Brains of older people are slow because they know so much. People do not decline mentally with age, it just takes them longer to recall facts because they have more information in their brains. Scientists believe this also makes you hard of hearing as it puts pressure on your inner ear.Also, older people often go to another room to get something and when they get there, they stand there wondering what they came for. It is NOT a memory problem, it is nature's way of making older people do more exercise. SO THERE!! I have more friends I should send this to, but right now I can't remember their names. So, please forward this to your friends; they may be my friends, too. --- ...TeeHee! Thanks Linda! -<>- _______________________________________________________________ TRP| | |DBL| | | |TRP| | | |DBL| | |TRP| WRD|___|___|LTR|___|___|___|WRD|___|___|___|LTR|___|___|WRD| |DBL| | | |TRP| | | |TRP| | | |DBL| | ____|WRD|___|___|___|LTR|___|___|___|LTR|___|___|___|WRD|___| | |DBL| | | |DBL| |DBL| | | |DBL| | | ____|___|WRD|___|___|___|LTR|___|LTR|___|___|___|WRD|___|___| DBL| | |DBL| | | |DBL| | | |DBL| | |DBL| LTR|___|___|WRD|___|___|___|LTR|___|___|___|WRD|___|___|LTR| | | | |DBL| | | | | |DBL| | | | | ____|___|___|___|WRD|___|___|___|___|___|WRD|___|___|___|___| |TRP| | | |TRP| | | |TRP| | | |TRP| | ____|LTR|___|___|___|LTR|___|___|___|LTR|___|___|___|LTR|___| | |DBL| | | |DBL| |DBL| | | |DBL| | | ____|___|LTR|___|___|___|LTR|___|LTR|___|___|___|LTR|___|___| TRP| | |DBL| | | |***| | | |DBL| | |TRP| WRD|___|___|LTR|___|___|___|***|___|___|___|LTR|___|___|WRD| | |DBL| | | |DBL| |DBL| | | |DBL| | | ____|___|LTR|___|___|___|LTR|___|LTR|___|___|___|LTR|___|___| |TRP| | | |TRP| | | |TRP| | | |TRP| | ____|LTR|___|___|___|LTR|___|___|___|LTR|___|___|___|LTR|___| | | | |DBL| | | | | |DBL| | | | | ____|___|___|___|WRD|___|___|___|___|___|WRD|___|___|___|___| DBL| | |DBL| | | |DBL| | | |DBL| | |DBL| LTR|___|___|WRD|___|___|___|LTR|___|___|___|WRD|___|___|LTR| | |DBL| | | |DBL| |DBL| | | |DBL| | | ____|___|WRD|___|___|___|LTR|___|LTR|___|___|___|WRD|___|___| |DBL| | | |TRP| | | |TRP| | | |DBL| | ____|WRD|___|___|___|LTR|___|___|___|LTR|___|___|___|WRD|___| TRP| | |DBL| | | |TRP| | | |DBL| | |TRP| WRD|___|___|LTR|___|___|___|WRS|___|___|___|LTR|___|___|WRD| Sue Teves Someone out there Must be "deadly" at Scrabble. Wait till you see the last one! It's going to be hard to top because It fits to a “T". When you rearrange the letters: You get... PRESBYTERIAN: BEST IN PRAYER ASTRONOMER: MOON STARER DESPERATION: A ROPE ENDS IT THE EYES: THEY SEE GEORGE BUSH: HE BUGS GORE THE MORSE CODE: HERE COME DOTS DORMITORY: DIRTY ROOM SLOT MACHINES: CASH LOST IN ME ELECTION RESULTS: LIES - LET'S RECOUNT SNOOZE ALARMS: ALAS! NO MORE Z'S A DECIMAL POINT: I'M A DOT IN PLACE THE EARTHQUAKES: THAT QUEER SHAKE ELEVEN PLUS TWO: TWELVE PLUS ONE AND FINALLY.... FOR THE GRAND FINALE: PRESIDENT BARACK OBAMA: An Arab Backed Imposter Bet your friends haven't seen this one! --- ...LOL! An awesome classic! Thanks Lind! ======================================================= >-->In The Worldly News: IF LOOK COULD KILLS: That Moment When Bill Maher Called Elizabeth Warren “POCAHONTAS” To Her Face [VIDEO] http://tinyurl.com/lyj4864 CBS News Dismayed DRUNK DRIVING ILLEGALS Are Getting Arrested For Such A Minor Offense http://tinyurl.com/kh6xgbp RED ALERT: House Votes On Whether Or Not To Allow Sharia Law In America - Here Is The HUGE Decision http://tinyurl.com/k8qnaeq ALERT: Trump Meets With Big Pharma Companies And DEMANDS They Lower Prices…Here Is Their SHOCKING Response http://tinyurl.com/kvwa4m8 Fox Business Host Lou Dobbs’ Assessment Of Trump’s First 100 Days – Gets Shout Out From The President [VIDEO] http://tinyurl.com/lbgejqk SPREAD THE WORD! The Media Is Hiding These 11 Unbelievable Things Trump Did In 100 Days [VIDEO] http://tinyurl.com/ksmehn3 First Lady Melania Trump dedicated a new garden for patients at one of America’s leading children’s hospitals on Friday as she grows more comfortable... http://tinyurl.com/lxw34hz KIDS CELEBRATE: Trump Plans To Roll Back Michelle Obama’s Disgusting School Lunch Program http://tinyurl.com/lh8htv4 -<>- >From BizarreNews: A famous playwright (who wasn't quite famous enough for me to remember his name) once wrote, "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned." And he wasn't kidding. Police in Oklahoma say a woman flew into a rage upon seeing her boyfriend's lover at a funeral home during a ceremony. 25-year-old Shaynna Lauren Sims is then alleged to have cut body parts from the 38-year-old woman. Fortunately for the victim, she was deceased. According to the police investigation, the 38-year-old victim who dated the suspect's boyfriend, died of natural causes. During the funeral the victim's family members noticed that the body had been vandalized. The body had numerous cuts, hair had been missing, and body parts were missing, including the woman's breasts. Police were called to the scene, and family members told officers that they saw Sims standing next to the casket with her hands inside. When police arrested Sims, she was in possession of a knife that contained traces of the victim's hair. Sims has been charged with vandalizing a corpse, burglary and illegal dissection. Her bail has been set at $20,000. -<>- If your house was burning down and you could save one thing inside it; what would it be? One South Dakota man was faced with just such a decision, and he chose: beer. And he was put in jail for it, too. Sioux Falls police said that they have arrested 56-year-old Michael Casteel, after he obstructed the work of firefighters. According to the police investigation, after a fire broke out Casteel's building, firefighters and police were evacuating and treating the wounded. That is when Casteel insisted on going back into his apartment to get some beer. Firefighters told him that he cannot enter the building as it was too dangerous. Casteel pushed police officers aside and entered the building. A few minutes later, he emerged from the building with two cans of beer. But Casteel did not get a chance to drink his beer as he was immediately arrested by police. The Sioux Falls Police Department wrote on Twitter: "This incredibly poor judgement could have put many responders at risk. It is not advisable to push past police and fire- fighters in an attempt to save your beer." Casteel has been charged with one count of obstructing a firefighter or law enforcement official. His bail has been set at $300. And to add insult to injury, the beer he went back into a burning building to rescue? Bud Ice *- Boy, 12, Stopped Trying to Escape Australia -* Police in Australia said a 12-year-old boy managed to drive 800 miles across the country before he was stopped by suspicious officers. New South Wales police said officers pulled over a vehicle on the Barrier Highway because its bumper was dragging on the ground. Police said the boy was trying to drive from Kendall, New South Wales, to Perth, Western Australia, a total distance of 2,485 miles. Investigators said he had made it about 800 miles before he was caught. The boy was stopped and taken to the local police station. The investigation is ongoing, police said. Well, Australia is (or was) a prison after all. *-- Some People Have All The Luck --* A Washington state man who won a $1,000 prize years ago said he scratched off his $50,000 ticket at the same store and showed it to the same cashier. Washington's Lottery said the Bellingham man purchased his $40 Million Mega Multiplier scratch-off ticket recently from a supermarket in Bellingham and he decided to scratch the ticket in the store's parking lot. "I scratched my ticket in the parking lot of the grocery store and when I saw it was a winner, I immediately went back inside to check with a cashier," the man said. "When I walked up to the register, I realized the clerk was the same woman who confirmed my last big lottery win years ago!" The man said the woman had been working a few years ago when he asked her to check a ticket that turned out to be a $1,000 winner. *------- Yakety Yak (Don't Smuggle That) -------* Smugglers were trying to bring illegal yak meat and dung into the United States, hidden in sweaters. U.S. Customs and Border Protection (CBP) announced the seizure and destruction of a shipment of over 132 kilos of prohibited yak meat, dung pods, and seeds for propagation imported from Nepal at New York's JFK Airport. The prohibited items were hidden in sweaters, shawls, pants, and other items of clothing. Yak meat is prohibited from being imported into the United States from countries affected by foot-and-mouth disease, such as Nepal. The shipment was initially identified by the Commercial Targeting and Analysis Center based on a tip from the public. I guess it's pretty hard to hide that yak dung smell. *--------------- Xylophone Rage ---------------* Let's face it; there are some things that are just annoying as heck. Xylophones are one of them. So it's not too surprising that a Florida woman attacked her boyfriend when he refused to stop playing a xylophone. According to investigators, 43-year-old April Encarnacion was arrested on a domestic battery charge after police responded to a 911 call in Fort Walton Beach. Police say Encarnacion was in the kitchen with the male victim, who was playing a xylophone around 9:20 PM. When Encarnacion asked him to stop, the man refused. That was when Encarnacion "dumped a pot of cold cooking grease on him," according to a court filing. Encarnacion is being held in lieu of $3000 bond. Totally worth it. ========================================================= >-->From Our Friend Geniann :) Pearls to pigs: ,, ;;'} ,""", | \ \_ ^oo^,-----. | `--"` (..) ) )& |___| . ^oo^,-""""`.`| )( ) (( | (..) ) )&( ^..^,-"""-. || ) `--'.| )_( ) (..) ) )& ||_| . . |( )) `--'| )_( ) jrei LL-.> . .. |( )) >WHEN YOU FEEL STUPID, READ THIS Some of the people quoted here have actually been involved in the government of this country. No wonder we are in such trouble! If you ever feel a little bit stupid, just dig this up and read it again; you'll begin to think you're a genius... (On September 17, 1994, Alabama's Heather Whitestone was selected as Miss America 1995.) Question: If you could live forever, would you and why? Answer: "I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever," --Miss Alabama in the 1994 Miss USA contest. "Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that, but not with all those flies and death and stuff." --Mariah Carey "Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life," -- Brooke Shields, during an interview to become spokesperson for federal anti-smoking campaign "I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body," --Winston Bennett, University of Kentucky basketball forward. "Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country," --Mayor Marion Barry, Washington, DC. "That lowdown scoundrel deserves to be kicked to death by a jackass, and I'm just the one to do it," --A congressional candidate in Texas "Half this game is ninety percent mental." --Philadelphia Phillies manager, Danny Ozark "It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it.." --Al Gore, Vice President "I love California. I practically grew up in Phoenix.." --Dan Quayle "We've got to pause and ask ourselves: How much clean air do we need?" --Lee Iacocca "The word "genius" isn't applicable in football. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein." --Joe Theisman, NFL football quarterback & sports analyst. "We don't necessarily discriminate. We simply exclude certain types of people." -- Colonel Gerald Wellman, ROTC Instructor. "Your food stamps will be stopped effective March 1992 because we received notice that you passed away. May God bless you. You may reapply if there is a change in your circumstances." --Department of Social Services, Greenville , South Carolina "Traditionally, most of Australia's imports come from overseas." --Keppel Enderbery "If somebody has a bad heart, they can plug this jack in at night as they go to bed and it will monitor their heart throughout the night. And the next morning, when they wake up dead, there'll be a record." -- Mark S. Fowler, FCC Chairman Feeling smarter yet? Send it on to Your brilliant friends. I just did !! --- ...LOL! Another great classic! Thanks Geniann! ============================================================== >-->From CleanLaffs: _...._ .'.o' o.'. /o o .o' o'\ |'.o 'o. o'.o| |o. o' o 'o .| \ o .o.'o'./ '._o__o_.' \ / || || || || || jgs || \/ A golfer, now into his golden years, had a lifelong ambition to play one hole at Pebble Beach, California the way the pros do it. The pros drive the ball out over the water onto the green that is on a spit of land that juts out off the coast. It was something he had tried hundreds of times without success. His ball always fell short, into the ocean. Because of this he never used a new all on this particular hole. He always picked out one that had a cut or a nick. Recently he went to Pebble Beach to try again. When he came to the fateful hole, he teed up an old cut ball and said a silent prayer. Before he hit it however, a powerful voice from above said, "WAIT...REPLACE THAT OLD BALL WITH A BRAND-NEW BALL." He complied, with some slight misgiving, despite the fact that the Lord seemed to be implying that He was going to let him finally achieve his lifelong ambition. As he stepped up to the tee once more, the voice came down again, "WAIT...STEP BACK... TAKE A PRACTICE SWING." So he stepped back and took a practice swing. The voice boomed out again, "TAKE ANOTHER PRACTICE SWING." He did. Silence followed. Then the voice spoke out again. "PUT BACK THE OLD BALL." -<>- An urbanite retired and moved to the country. Every morning he put on his denims and a straw hat and made every effort to become a country gentleman. One day an old friend came to visit him from the city. As he was showing him around the farm they came to the gentle- man's pride and joy...a fine-looking horse. "Yes sir," said the gentleman, "I go for a buggy ride almost every morning. How about I hitch up old Sea Biscuit and we go for a ride?" "Suits me." answers the friend. The gentleman started to harness the horse, but the animal resisted having the bit put in his mouth. It was obvious that the new farmer had no idea how to harness a horse, and after the tenth attempt to get the horse to open its mouth, the guest said, "Why don't you wait until he yawns?" -<>- A man went to see an old friend of his who is an executive with a large corporation. Pulling out all the stops, the visitor said, "I'm at my wits end. I haven't worked for six months. My unemployment is about to run out, my wife is working two part-time jobs just to put food on the table and to top it all off the house is going into foreclosure!" His friend the executive said, "Stop! I can't take this." Pushing his intercom button he says to his secretary, "Jane, throw this man out. He's breaking my heart." -<>- Show me a man with both feet on the ground and I'll show you a man who can't put on his pants. ------------------------------------- Two fish are in a tank. One says to the other, "do you know how to drive this thing?" -<>- The professor of a graduate-school class of gifted students included a huge amount of material on the midterm exam. Tension in the room built, people were sighing and gasping aloud as they realized how much material they had covered and were expected to recall. The following week the professor tossed the graded papers on her desk and announced, "Class, after I left here last week, the Lord spoke to me. He said, "Thanks, professor. I haven't heard from some of those people in years!" -<>- A DJ was introducing a record. "This next one," he said, "is for Charlotte Burke, who is a hundred and eleven. Hey, Charlotte, congratulations on a ripe old age!" There was a short pause and then the DJ said in a somewhat more subdued voice, "I'm sorry, I got it wrong. This next one is for Charlotte Burke, who is ill." -<>- Needless to say, one of the most successful inventors of all time was the man who invented the hay-bailing machine. He made a bundle. -<>- I LOOVEEEE IIIIT... ..... C C / /< / ___ __________/_#__=o /(- /(\_\________ \ \ ) \ )_ \o \ /|\ /|\ |' | | _| /o __\ / ' | / / | /_/\______| ( _( < \ \ \ \ \ | \____\____\ ____\_\__\_\ /` /` o\ |___ |_______|.. . b'ger Hans and Stein were playing in their yard in Zurich when one of the boys accidentally swallowed a coin and started choking. Hans ran inside to get help, "Mamma! Pappa! Come quick! There's a franc in Stein!" -<>- Subject: Human Resources Dear Hiring Manager, Thank you for your letter of March 16. After careful consid- eration, I regret to inform you that I am unable to accept your refusal to offer me a position in your department at this time. This year I have been particularly fortunate in receiving an unusually large number of rejection letters. With such a varied and promising field of candidates, it is impossible for me to accept all refusals. Despite your companies' outstanding qualifications and previous experience in rejecting applicants, I find that your rejection does not meet my needs at this time. Therefore, I will assume the position in your department this August. I look forward to seeing you then. Best of luck in rejecting future applicants. Sincerely, Interviewee -<>- A priest walked into a barber shop in Washington, D.C. After he got his haircut, he asked how much it would be. The barber said, "No charge. I consider it a service to the Lord." The next morning, the barber came to work and there were 12 prayer books and a thank you note from the priest in front of the door. Later that day, a police officer came in and got his hair cut. He then asked how much it was. The barber said, "No charge. I consider it a service to the community." The next morning, he came to work and there were a dozen donuts and a thank you note from the police officer. Then, a Senator came in and got a haircut. When he was done he asked how much it was. The barber said, "No charge. I consider it a service to the country." The next morning, the barber came to work and there were 12 Senators in front of the door. ========================================================= >-->From TheMouth: ___ //))))) )))@_@) ((( = ) ))) -(_ __ / `-'\\ /,\\\` /__| )y | < \ (\_/ `.\ \ {>>>` | /`-'\____| / c \\ / (C \_ _))\ `-'-._/ \ / /\ \ / ,' `. \ / / \ \ <\_\_ \ \ `---` (_`-\_ `---' hjw >For The Guys - While your lady takes her own sweet time shopping at the mall, here's a few things you can do to pass the time: 1. In house wares, set all the alarm clocks to go off at 10 minute intervals. 2. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, "I think we have a code 3 in domestics," and see what happens. 3. Go to Customer Service and put some M&M's on layaway. 4. Move CAUTION WET FLOOR sign to the carpeted areas. 5. Set up a tent in the camping department.... tell others you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows from the bedding department. 6. When someone asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask "Why won't you people leave me alone?" 7. Look right into the security camera and use it as a mirror while you pick your nose. 8. Dart around the aisles suspiciously while humming the theme from 'Mission Impossible.' 9. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through whisper "Pick me!! Pick Me!!." 10. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, any announcement, assume the fetal position and scream "NO, NO! It's those voices again!" -<>- _ _.-'`-._ _ ;.'________'.; _________n.[____________].n_________ |""_""_""_""||==||==||==||""_""_""_""] |"""""""""""||..||..||..||"""""""""""| |LI LI LI LI||LI||LI||LI||LI LI LI LI| |.. .. .. ..||..||..||..||.. .. .. ..| |LI LI LI LI||LI||LI||LI||LI LI LI LI| ,,;;,;;;,;;;,;;;,;;;,;;;,;;;,;;,;;;,;;;,;;,, ;;jgs;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; >GOVERNMENT *Ten civil servants standing in a line, One of them was downsized -- then there were nine. *Nine civil servants who must negotiate, One joined the union -- then there were eight. *Eight civil servants thought they were in heaven, 'Til one of them was redeployed -- then there were seven. *Seven civil servants, their jobs as safe as bricks, But one was reclassified -- then there were six. *Six civil servants trying to survive, One of them was privatized -- then there were five. *Five civil servants ready to give more, But one golden handshake reduced them to four. *Four civil servants full of loyalty, Their jobs were all advertised -- then there were three. *Three civil servants under review, One left on secondment -- then there were two. *Two civil servants coping on the run, One went on stress leave -- then there was one. *The last civil servant agreed to relocate, Replaced by 10 consultants at twice the hourly rate. -<>- . |\ /| \ / | \ .'. | \ '.|_(())))) ((((/.( ,))) _/ ((((_( )/ \\ \__/-) /\__ \_\(\ .'\ \ '. )\ \\\ ___..' o \ \.' / \ \\\ ''---. \_\ / '.\\\ . ' , '--.'\_ /. .| \-'---- O - \/O'. (_/ \ \| ) ' . ' |O O \___ /.'.__.'._.' | O|_O O/ /.'. .'. | |O |O O/) / O '._.' '.| |_O|_O'/ / O | ||/ / /'._________.'| \ )_/ /''.-.-.-.-.-.-| '. \ '.____________.' \ _\ |/ /mrf __'\\ __(,\_\_ _______ ____ __ ____(_'--_)__ >NOSE JOKES Steve Martin plays a fireman with a big nose in the movie "Roxanne", (also starring Daryl Hannah). After a man in a bar makes a wisecrack about his nose, Steve Martin claims he can do better than that. He's challenged to come up with 20... and ends up coming out with no less than 25 nose jokes! Here they are, in their full glory: 1. Obvious: Excuse me. Is that your nose or did a bus park on your face? 2. Meteorological: Everybody take cover. She's going to blow. 3. Fashionable: You know, you could de-emphasize your nose if you wore something larger. Like ... Wyoming. 4. Personal: Well, here we are. Just the three of us. 5. Punctual: Alright gentlemen. Your nose was on time but you were fifteen minutes late. 6. Envious: Ooooh, I wish I were you. Gosh. To be able to smell your own ear. 7. Naughty: Pardon me, Sir. Some of the ladies have asked if you wouldn't mind putting that thing away. 8. Philosophical: You know. It's not the size of a nose that's important. It's what's in it that matters. 9. Humorous: Laugh and the world laughs with you. Sneeze and it's goodbye Seattle. 10. Commercial: Hi, I'm Earl Schibe and I can paint that nose for $39.95. .--"-. Where's the fire? / " LEmme use my hose to put it out! : (o"""| / ,- `-._| ,'-" `,-' /--.( / . \ > ) : |\ .\ T `.\ ` Y : \ !. Ojo 11. Polite: Ah. Would you mind not bobbing your head. The orchestra keeps changing tempo. 12. Melodic: Everybody! "He's got the whole world in his nose." 13. Sympathetic: Oh, What happened? Did your parents lose a bet with God? 14. Complimentary: You must love the little birdies to give them this to perch on. 15. Scientific: Say, does that thing there influence the tides. 16. Obscure: Oh, I'd hate to see the grindstone. 17. Inquiry: When you stop to smell the flowers, are they afraid? 18. French: Say, the pigs have refused to find any more truffles until you leave. 19. Pornographic: Finally, a man who can satisfy two women at once. 20. Religious: The Lord giveth and He just kept on giving, didn't He! 21. Disgusting: Say, who mows your nose hair. 22. Paranoid: Keep that guy away from my cocaine! 23. Aromatic: It must be wonderful to wake up in the morning and smell the coffee ... in Brazil. 24. Appreciative: Oooo, how original. Most people just have their teeth capped. 25. Dirty: Your name wouldn't be Dick, would it? ========================================================= >-->FUN Places To Net Visit :) Hot Air Balloons! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/hotair.html Extreme Camping! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/camp.html Most Expensive Cars! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/expensivecars.html Super Rare Muscle Cars! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/musclecars.html All Occasion Cakes 2! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/aocakes2.html Back In Time! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/backintime.html Beautiful Artistic Stairs! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/artisticstairs.html World's Tallest Tunnel Slide! http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/tallestslide.html World Of Squirrels http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/worldofsquirrels.html Beautiful Australia! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/beautifulaustralia.html Beautiful Rare Flowers 3! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/rareflowers3.html Keukenhof Gardens! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/kgardens.html Designer Toilets! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/designertoilets.html Fun With Statues! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/funstatues.html Kids With Animals! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/kidswithanimals.html Only One Job! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/onejob.html -<>- >Please Visit/Follow Me On StumbleUpon Here: http://tinyurl.com/kf3smgn -<>- >From AFA: AFA is joining the National Day of Prayer Task Force for the annual observance of the National Day of Prayer this Thursday, May 4, 2017, where you and I join with government leaders and people in communities all around the country to lift our needs and concerns for America before the Lord. Now more than ever before, it is imperative that we as God's people remain on our knees for our nation and fellow citizens. The critical challenges facing the United States and the culture at large call for faithful, persevering intercession - not only on the National Day of Prayer, but throughout the year. Visit National Day of Prayer to find an event in your area and to learn more about National Day of Prayer. http://tinyurl.com/l2bqtjj -<>- >From Our Friend Melody :) The Amish and Taxes | Amish 365: Amish Recipes – Amish Cooking http://www.amish365.com/the-amish-and-taxes/ --- ...TeeHee! Of Course! Thanks Melody! -<>- >From Our Friend LouiseAu :) Magician Mac King demonstrates to us how to perform The Rope Trick that will leave you baffled and confused. He is so good at this that other magicians like Teller from the Penn and Teller duo have never been able to spot how Mac pulls this off. It’s knot easy to perform a magic trick with a rope so I have to imagine that many a magician would like to be as good as Mac is. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xmI9uwYzH9o You won't believe this voice is coming out of a 9-year-old! You have to hear this incredible little girl sing her little heart out for the Lord as she expresses the true spirit of worship. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_tblemYoSWE&feature=player_embedded There are so many ways that thieves can use ATMs to steal your money. Click here to see one of the scary, subtle ways they can do it, and the best way to protect yourself. http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=JbDdsUh_sTg --- ...Wowsers! Great ones! Thanks LouiseAu! =========================================================== >-->Quotes & Thunkers: "I called a temp agency looking for work and they asked if I had any phone skills. I told them, I called you didn't I?" -Zach Galifianakis "I can't understand why I should give a cut crystal serving tray as a wedding gift to a guy who I knew only yesterday as Snot Boy." -Paul Provenza "Caucasians do things differently at their weddings than Mexicans do. Like, they send out invitations ahead of time. See, we pull up to the corner, "Hey Chuy! My cousin Carlos is getting married. Follow me!'" -Debi Gutierrez "At first I thought that my life was going around in circles. Then I realized it's actually a downward spiral." -Tom Ryan "I was high on life, but eventually I built up a tolerance." -Arj Barker He was a brilliant attorney. The other day he got a parking ticket reduced to involuntary manslaughter. "I went to an authentic Mexican restaurant. The waiter poured the water and then warned me not to drink it." - Brad Garrett "Who ever thought up the word "Mammogram"? Every time I hear it, I think I'm supposed to put my breast in an envelope and send it to someone." --Jan Kingsley "For Christmas I bought my brother a combination fax machine and paper shredder. Either we hooked it up wrong or a lot of people are faxing him confetti." - Anthony Clarke I tell you, with my doctor, I don't get no respect. Well, I told him I've swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills. He told me to have a few drinks and get some rest. - Rodney Dangerfield "I saw a woman wearing a sweatshirt with 'Guess' on it. I said, 'Thyroid problem?'" - Emo Philips "If I ever had twins, I'd use one for parts." - Steven Wright "The airlines are working much harder to deal with the problem of lost luggage. This morning I saw a picture of my suitcase on a milk carton." - Unknown "According to a recent study in 'Bride' magazine, women who are engaged say they have sex on the average of 2.9 times a week. And they say that .9 is really frustrating." - Jay Leno "When I'm at a Chinese restaurant having a hard time with chopsticks, I always hope that there's a Chinese kid at an American restaurant somewhere who's struggling mightily with a fork." - Rick Budinich (from Ruminations at topfive.com) >Updated FUN STUFF URLS - Oh Yeah :) Shangy! ------------------------------------------------------------------------ http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/urls.html FUN URLS ------------------------------------------------------------------------ -->FULL LENGTH - FREE On line AUDIO MP3 Christian Foundational Class http://www.truthortradition.com/modules.php?name=News&file=article&sid=61 NEW LIFE IN CHRIST! ------------------------------------------------------------------------ -->This is for all you who love food and DARE to make it at home Yep. You guessed it - Recipes. These are Tried and True, Yummy to the Tummy, good old fashioned home cooking recipes that are EASY to do :) Visit Shangy's Easy-Does-It Home Recipes: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/easy.html Home Recipes >Got A good Recipe? SHARE IT HERE: Share A Recipe ************************************************************************ >TO SUBSCRIBE: Visit Here This Weeks regular Shangy emails OR For the Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com ************************************************************************