Happy Memorial Day Celebration! ... :) Shangy! >Here are the details on our Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com To UnSubscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com Group home page: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ShangyFunList or Web Site: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/ShangyFunList.html Group email address: ShangyFunList@yahoogroups.com or email me here: bcrsystems@earthlink.net ================ *~* Please Consider Giving To ShangralaFamilyFun.com The cost of the website has gone up dramatically due to the ever increasingly wonderful pages and photos being added each week to entertain you and our fellow Christian families. If every one would chip in $25 or more, we'd be good for the whole year! So Please - I need your help today! "We are each of us angels with but one wing, and can only fly by embracing each other" -Luciano Decrescenzo ~ CALLING ALL CARING ANGELS ~ *~* WE NEED CARING And SHARING Angels *~* >Do You Want To Be A Shangrala Angel? If you'd like to help and be counted as a Shangrala Angel, the easiest way to do that is through online giving. It is easy to use, and most of all, it is secure. Please visit the site, scroll down and click on the donate button. A Secure PAYPAL form page comes up. NOTE: Paypal will generate a 'Quantity 1' and 'Price per item' form. Just ignore the price per item and put whatever it is you desire to give in there. With Paypal, you will have your normal receipt for your 'payment' donation in USD (United States Dollars). You can put a memo in there if you'd like. EVERY LITTLE BIT WILL HELP! Any amount is greatly appreciated and needed! PLEASE Visit Shangrala to Help: http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/index.html OR If you'd rather send us a donation, Please MAIL it here: Elrhea Bigham 502 S. Harrison Van Wert, OH 45891 *~* THANK YOU! MAY GOD BLESS YOU MOST ABUNDANTLY FOR YOUR GIFT! ================ *~* A REMINDER: PLEASE Send me sweet, interesting, funny, inspiring, family type forwards ANY TIME here... bcrsystems@earthlink.net I Need them, Love them, Use them, and Share them! THANK YOU!! AND For Facebook Users: Please Like Me here... http://tinyurl.com/cma6all AND Please Share This email with All Your Friends And Family! ^~^ May God SUPER BLESS You As You Do! THANK YOU! -<>- * NOTE: An easy way to adjust the size of print in email or any page is to hold down the Ctrl tab while moving the scroll button on the mouse. You can also use the keyboard to change the font size in your web browser or emails. Hold down the Ctrl key while pressing the + key for larger text or the - key for smaller text! ================ ============;===========;() # # # #:::::: # # # #:::::: # # # #:::::: # # # #:::::: # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # jgs # # # # # # # *~* A Very Happy, Blessed And Safe Memorial Day Celebration! May God bless all our Gold Star Families through Jesus Christ. A special THANK YOU to all our veterans for their service. We do so owe you a debt of gratitude for your sacrifice for our country. -<>- >-->In The 'Shangy' News :) I am pleased to announced we have a new sponsor. Gabriel & Co. is one of the top jewelry designers on social media. Their website is viewed by millions of consumers a year. Gabriel & Co. has been featured in magazines such as: Vogue, Harper’s Bazaar, Elle, In-Style, and The Knot. They have jewelry for every type of woman, whatever her style and personality. Gabriel & Co. Fine Jewelry https://tinyurl.com/y3fwn7vq Anytime you click through their ad and buy something, you will be not only purchasing an excellent keepsake item, but you will be benefiting our website ShangralaFamilyFun.com so that I may continue to provide you with fun and inspirational emails and pages to add a little variety and SMILES for your day. So, if you see an ad on my website, please click through and check them out knowing I have chosen them for their quality of service and items. Why? Because I care About you! :) -<>- >HOT Off The 'Shangy' Press :) This flaming hot new page is from our friend Linda. If you are like me, you'll find these photos to be thought provoking and often even mesmerizing as you become lost in them. I especially had fun with the video and had to keep playing it over and over and over again - An old time favorite. So have some fun and check this out here... \\\ \\ \\ \ \\ \\\\ \\\ \\ \\\ \\ \ \\\\ \ \\\\\ \\\\\ \\ \\\\\ \\\ \\ \\\\ \\ \\ \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ \\ \\ \\\\\\\\\\ \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ \\ \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ ` \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ \ \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ . \\\\\\\\\\ \\\\\\\\\\\ \\ \\\wWWWWWWWww. \\\\\\\ ` \\ \\\WWW"""::::::""WWw \\\\\ , \ \\ \\wWWW" .,wWWWWWWw.. WWw. \\\ ` ` \\\\\wWW" W888888888888W "WXX. `\\ . `.\\wWW" M88888i#####888"8M "WWX. `\` \ \` wWWW" M88888##d###"w8oo88M WWMX. `\ ` \wWWW" :W88888####* #88888M; WWIZ. `` - -- wWWWW" W88888####42##88888W WWWXx . / "WIZ W8n889######98888W WWXx. ' '/"Wm, W88888999988888W >WWR" : ' "WMm. "WW88888888WW" mmMM" ' "Wmm. "WWWWWW" ,whAT?" ""MMMmm.. _,mMMMM""" ""MMMMMMMMMMMMMM"""" Mike Jittlov 12/95 The LOOK! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/thelook.html --- ...I do so Love this one! Thanks Linda! ======================================================= >-->From SmileZilla: ,-----. W/,-. ,-.\W ()>a a<() (.--(_)--.) ,'/.-'\_/`-.\`. ,' / `-' \ `. / \ / \ / `. ,' \ / / `-._.-' \ \ ,-`-._/| |=|o |\_.-< <,--.) |_____| |o____| )_ \ `-)| |// _ \\| )/ || |' | `| || | | | || ( )|( ) || | | | || | | | || |_.--.|.--._| || /'""| |""`\ [] `===' `===' hjw >Wisdom from Grandpa - Whether a man winds up with a nest egg, or a goose egg, depends a lot on the kind of chick he marries. - Trouble in marriage often starts when a man gets so busy earnin' his salt, that he forgets his sugar. - Too many couples marry for better, or for worse, but not for good. - When a man marries a woman, they become one; but the trouble starts when they try to decide which one. - If a man has enough horse sense to treat his wife like a thoroughbred, she will never turn into an old nag. - On anniversaries, the wise husband always forgets the past – but never the present. - The bonds of matrimony are a good investment, only when the interest is kept up. - Many girls like to marry a military man – he can cook, sew, and make beds, and is in good health, and he's already used to taking orders. - Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age, and start bragging about it. - The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for. - Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people to know "why" I look this way. I've traveled a long way and some of the roads weren't paved. - How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are? - When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to your youth, remember about Algebra. - I don't know how I got over the hill without getting to the top. - One of the many things no one tells you about aging is that it is such a nice change from being young. - Ah, being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable. - Old age is when former classmates are so gray and wrinkled and bald, they don't recognize you. - If you don't learn to laugh at trouble, you won't have anything to laugh at when you are old. ======================================================= +------------ BIZARRE HOLIDAYS ------------+ May 27 is Memorial Day and Sun Screen Day May 28 is Amnesty International Day and National Hamburger Day May 29 is Learn About Composting Day May 30 is Mint Julep Day and Water a Flower Day May 31 is National Macaroon Day, Save Your Hearing Day and World No Tobacco Day June 1 is Dare Day, Flip a Coin Day and National Trails Day June 2 is National Bubba Day and National Rocky Road Day ======================================================= >-->From GoodCleanFun: _.._ .-" "-. / ,- -. \ : ' o o ` ; ; . , : : :-.__.-: ; \ :_: :_: / bug `-._ _.-' "" >Waterproofing The telephone solicitor selling basement waterproofing must have thought she'd died and gone to heaven when she got my very patient son on the phone. At the end of her very long sales pitch, she asked, "Do you mind if we send someone out to give you an estimate?" "Not at all," my son said. "When would be a good time?" "As soon as I dig a basement," he replied. -<>- >Punctuality A company owner was asked a question, "How do you motivate your employees to be so punctual?" He smiled & replied, "It's simple. I have 30 employees and 29 free parking spaces. One is paid parking." -<>- >High Blood Pressure Nurse: Your blood pressure is amazingly high. Is your job very stressful? Patient: Well, I work at a petting zoo. Nurse: That seems easy enough. Patient: I determine which animals are too vicious to be petted. -<>- >Baby Picture A 12-year-old girl asked her mother, "Mom, do you have a baby picture of yourself? I need it for a school project." Her mother gave her one without thinking to ask what the project was. A few days later she was in the classroom for a parent-teacher meeting when she noticed her face pinned to a mural the students had created. The title of their project was "The oldest thing in my house." -<>- >Personal Statistics I am five feet, three inches tall and pleasingly plump. Recently, after I had a minor accident, my mother accompanied me to the emergency room. The ER nurse asked for my height and weight, and I responded in a serious tone, "Five-foot-eight, 125 pounds." While the nurse pondered this information, my mother leaned over to me ... "Sweetheart," she gently chided, "this is not the Internet." ========================================================= >-->From Our Friend LouiseAu :) ___ ,-'" "`-. ,'_ `. / / \ ,- \ __ | \_0 --- | / | | | \ \ `--.______,-/ | ___) \ ,--"" ,/ | / _ \ \-_____,- / \__-/ \ | `. ,' \___/ < ´--------' \__/\ | Wny \__// >SMILES Two carrots were walking down the road when a huge transfer truck slammed into one of them. An ambulance was called and they rushed the little fellow off to the hospital where he immediately went into hours of surgery. Finally the doctor emerged and approached the other carrot who had been anxiously awaiting in the waiting room. "Tell me Doc, how is he?" The doctor replied, "I've got some good news and some bad news. The good news is he's going to live. The bad news is we're pretty sure he's going to be a vegetable for the rest of his life. ---------- The strong young man at the construction site was bragging that he could out do anyone in a feat of strength. He made a special case of making fun of one of the older workmen. After several minutes, the older worker had enough. "Why don't you put your money where your mouth is," he said. "I will bet a week's wages that I can haul something in a wheelbarrow over to that outbuilding that you won't be able to wheel back." "You're on, old man," the braggart replied. "Let's see what you got." The old man reached out and grabbed the wheelbarrow by the handles. Then, nodding to the young man, he said, "All right. Get in." ---------- Stuck in rush-hour traffic, I couldn't help but stare at a burly biker wearing a black leather jacket and chaps pulled up next to me on a shocking pink Harley. My first thoughts were, "Is that really a pink Harley? I wonder if he's..." Just then the traffic cleared, and he pulled up in front of me. On the back of his jacket were stenciled the words, "Yes, it is. No, I'm not." ---------- Two priests died at the same time and met Saint Peter at the Pearly Gates. St. Peter said, "I'd like to get you guys in now, but our computer's down. You'll have to go back to Earth for about a week, but you can't go back as priests. What'll it be?" The first priest says, "I've always wanted to be an eagle, soaring above the Rocky mountains." "So be it," says St. Peter, and off flies the first priest. The second priest mulls this over for a moment and asks, "Will any of this week 'count', St. Peter?" "No, I told you the computer's down. There's no way we can keep track of what you're doing." "In that case," says the second priest, "I've always wanted to be a stud." "So be it" says St. Peter, and the second priest disappears. A week goes by, the computer is fixed, and the Lord tells St. Peter to recall the two priests. "Will you have any trouble locating them?" He asks. "The first one should be easy," says St. Peter. "He's somewhere over the Rockies, flying with the eagles. But the second one could prove to be more difficult." "Why?" asked the Lord. "He's on a snow tire, somewhere in North Dakota... -<>- >Polish? Everyone seems to be in such a hurry to scream 'prejudice' these days................ A customer asked, "In what aisle can I find the Polish sausage?" The clerk asks, "Are you Polish?" The guy, clearly offended, says, "Yes I am. But let me ask you something. If I had asked for Italian sausage, would you ask me if I was Italian? Or if I had asked for German Bratwurst, would you ask me if I was German? Or if I asked for a kosher hot dog would you ask me if I was Jewish? Or if I had asked for a Taco, would you ask if I was Mexican? Or if I asked for some Whiskey, would you ask if I was Irish?" The clerk says, "No, I probably wouldn't." The guy says, "Well then, because I asked for Polish sausage, why did you ask me if I'm Polish?" The clerk replied, "Because you're in Ace Hardware." --- ...LOL! Thanks LouiseAu! ________ /________\ //( ( ( ( \\ || ((|| ||) ) ` ) )|| || (\___( ( || \|) ) \)_|/ / ((\_v_/ \ / /) x \ \ | | x | | | \ x / | | | x | | | |\ x /| | | |/\ x /\| | | | \x/ | | | | V | | /____\ /____\ | | | | / \ / \ | | | | `~~| |~~' >Daughter A man was telling his buddy : "You won't believe what happened last night. My daughter walked into the living room and said: Dad, cancel my allowance immediately, forget my college tuition loan, rent my room out, throw all my clothes out the window, take my TV and my laptop. Please take any of my jewelry to the Salvation Army or Cash Converters. Then sell my car, take my front door key away, and throw me out of the house. Then disown me and never talk to me again. And don't forget to write me out of your will and leave my share to any charity you choose." "Holy Smokes," replied the friend, "she actually said that?" "Well, she didn't put it quite like that. She actually said: "Dad, meet my new boyfriend, Mohammed. We're going to work together on Bernie Sander’s presidential campaign." --- ...Oh Gee! HaHaHa! Thanks LouiseAu! -<>- >Politics... Factual, fascinating, and chilling Let’s follow the trail. Everyone needs to read this slowly and patiently because it’s very important! Here's what it looks like when all the pieces are sewn together. It smells like conspiracy and treason. From 2001 to 2005 there was an ongoing investigation into the Clinton Foundation. A Grand Jury had been impaneled. Governments from around the world had donated to the “Charity.” Yet, from 2001 to 2003 none of those “donations” to the Clinton Foundation were declared. Hmmm, now you would think that an honest investigator would be able to figure this out. Guess who took over this investigation in 2002? None other than James Comey. Guess who was transferred in to the Internal Revenue Service to run the Tax Exemption Branch of the IRS? Your friend and mine, Lois “Be on The Look Out” (BOLO) Lerner. Full of this here: https://tinyurl.com/y94n932y --- ...Most Interesting! Thanks LouiseAu! Since we are on the topic of politics, many of you may recall that a long time ago, I said that the Left seemed to be blaming Trump for things that they themselves are guilty of. And I gave you the analogy from Psychologists of a cheating person accusing their mate of doing what they were doing and that 9 times out of ten if your mate accuses you of cheating it is because they have or are cheaters themselves. I've noticed this over and over with the Democrats and Liberals. It is called - Projection; the unconscious transfer of one's desires or emotions to another person. ... The person accusing you also could be a narcissist. They often accuse people of doing things that they themselves are doing as a form of deflecting To control the conversation. What is the definition of when someone accuses you of doing things they are guilty of doing? https://tinyurl.com/yyxjrhbu I just find it interesting that Fox News and others are seeing this now too by the Democrats and actually calling them out for it. Nice :) ========================================================= >-->From HandyHints: .----------. | ~ON~ | | ____ | | |.--.| | | || || | | ||__|| | | ||\ \| | | |\ \_\ | | |_\[_] | | | jgs | ~OFF~ | '----------' >Reverse your ceiling fan Most ceiling fans have a switch to reverse the direction. It might not be obvious, but run your hand along the fan's main body and you should be able to find it. From your point of view looking up at it, you want the fan to run counter clockwise at a higher speed during the summer. This forces room air down towards you and creates the cool wind feeling. When you run it clockwise at a low speed, it pulls the air in reverse, drawing the room air up to the ceiling, cycling air near the ceiling back down, and pushing air towards the walls. Since heat rises, this means warm air near your ceiling is moved back into the main part of the room. -<>- >Wash on cold rather than hot or warm water This makes a big difference, and most modern washers do an equally fine job of getting clothes spic and span in cold. Likewise, try to hang dry items when you can - skipping the tumble dryer can nix around 60% of energy used on laundry. -<>- Vinegar is strong enough to kill weeds, as well as plants you actually like, so instead of spraying it recklessly around your yard or garden, try painting it directly on the leaves of whatever plant you're trying to get rid of. Of course, if you're attacking weeds that sprout up from cracks in your asphalt, fire at will. For best results, use white vinegar on a day of dry, sunny weather; vinegar needs some time in the sun to work its deadly magic on weeds. -<>- >Vinegar and Pet Care Dogs and cats can often be bothered by itchy, scaly ears, especially if you have a dog with floppy ears like a retriever. Dilute white vinegar in a 1-to-4 ratio (1 tablespoon vinegar to 4 tablespoons water, for example), and let it soak into a clean rag. Then use the rag to wipe out the inside of your pet's ears. And if your pet gets sprayed by a skunk, vinegar is an easier acid to use than ketchup for getting rid of the smell, since ketchup itself doesn't rinse off all that easily. Finally, if unwanted cats are creeping around your yard, spray or pour vinegar onto their favorite litter box; felines can't stand the stuff! -<>- >Vinegar and Car Care Still sporting a bumper sticker you'd rather not display any longer? Remove it with a few squirts of undiluted white vinegar. You may need to reapply the vinegar a few times to completely loosen the bumper sticker. Additionally, vinegar can be used as a glass cleaner and deodorizer in your car; you can even add it to your wind- shield wiper reservoir to keep your glass shiny if your car's owner's manual suggests it. Vinegar is acidic enough to ruin some motor parts, so don't add it to your windshield-washer fluid if your owner's manual advises against it. You can also wipe down your windows with diluted vinegar in winter to keep them frost-free. -<>- >Strike Oil You cook with oil when you're making something on your stove, so why would outside be any different? Often times, leaner cuts of protein, like fish, tend to stick to the grates of your grill. Defend against it by using a pair of tongs to rub a paper towel soaked in cooking oil over the grates. An alternative method is to brush your food with olive oil and season it with sea salt before it goes on the grill. -<>- >'Go Green' Hints: Avoid waste Consider using reusable dishes and silverware, rather than disposable. Say no to paper plates and plastic cutlery. If you re having a small gathering, use your own plates (reusable ones) and your own cutlery. It's not a big deal having to wash up a few bits after the event. If the event is so big that using your own plates is not an option, make sure you opt for biodegradable utensils and plates for the guests. Another important consideration is avoiding prepackaged waste and buying fruit and vegetables from a produce stand, rather than in a package. ---- Cut down on all water use Turn off the faucet while you're brushing your teeth; only wash full loads of laundry (in cold water - it saves energy). Start to drink tap water instead of bottled. Try washing dishes by hand a few days a week. Scrape rather than rinse dishes before loading into the dishwasher. Keep a pitcher of water in the fridge as opposed to letting the faucet run until it's cold. ---- House Cleaning With Vinegar Vinegar is one of the world's best all-purpose green cleaners with dozens of cleaning uses. Diluted white vinegar is excellent for cleaning windows, hardwood floors, carpet stains, fireplace bricks and irons, CDs and DVDs, shower curtains, upholstery, mattresses, wood furniture (when combined with olive oil), and glassware. If it's in your house, you can probably clean it with vinegar. Warning: The one exception is marble and other stone surfaces. The acid in vinegar (and lemon and wine) can permanently damage these surfaces, so keep vinegar away from these stones. ======================================================= >-->In The Worldly News: Graham on Trump's presidency, declassification of 2016 election intel https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=617p5fPjIx8 The Whitehouse: https://www.whitehouse.gov/ Westwing News: https://www.whitehouse.gov/westwingreads/ WhiteHouseNews: https://www.whitehouse.gov/1600daily/ Latest From 1600daily: http://1600daily.com/ Latest From AFA: http://tinyurl.com/j7lakqw Students For Life https://tinyurl.com/yd5nxmu6 Latest From OperationRescue: http://www.operationrescue.org/ Latest Product Alert: Sausages, Soups, Sports Equipment http://www.emergencyemail.org/products/?fmt=text Latest Health Alert: http://www.emergencyemail.org/health/?fmt=text Click For Free to Give: https://www.greatergood.com/emails/2019/reminder-052619-THS-w.html Survival Update Latest: http://survivalupdate.com/ -<>- >From BizarreNews: Sometimes people die for a reason; Maybe they are a soldier, or maybe they overdose on drugs. Some people just get sick and die for no reason at all. Then there are the people who get run over while doing pushups, naked in the street. The unfortunate fitness enthusiast was 43-year-old James Earl Hunter of Oregon. Portland Police were called to a report of a man running naked in traffic at 4 a.m. As officers responded, a second report came in that the naked man was doing push-ups in the street. Then, a third report that he'd been struck by a vehicle. Officers and emergency medical workers found the man, deceased, according to the Portland Police Bureau. The driver of the vehicle that struck the man remained at the scene and was cooperative. The driver was not impaired by alcohol or drugs, according to police. -<>- 27-year-old Washington resident Cameron Jeffrey Wilson had a pistol tucked into his front pocket when the gun discharged, sending a bullet through his testicles and into his thigh, according to a probable cause affidavit. That's bad enough, but Mr. Wilson was only beginning to make bad decisions. Instead of heading directly to a hospital, Wilson instructed his girlfriend to first drive to Lincoln Park in Wenatchee, where he gave the pistol to a friend, since he is a 13-time convicted felon and it is illegal for him to possess a firearm. With that little legal landmine avoided, Wilson finally went to the hospital, where things got much, much worse. As doctors and nurses performed surgery at Central Washington Hospital, a balloon containing marijuana slipped out of his anus, the affidavit said. Chelan County sheriff's detectives were notified that Wilson had suffered a gunshot wound and then responded to the hospital. They searched the car and found a bag of methamphetamine inside a pair of blood-stained jeans he'd taken off before entering the hospital. Detectives declined to arrest Wilson at the hospital and instead issued an arrest warrant. Like the genius he is, Wilson turned himself in at which point he was given a strip search. During that search ANOTHER balloon of marijuana slipped from Wilson's anus. Either he forgot it was up there or he was planning on smoking it IN jail. Either way, this guy has one loose anus. He was arrested and then charged with possession of a controlled substance in a correctional facility, but his legal troubles would continue. From the jail, Wilson made multiple calls to his girl- friend asking her not to cooperate with investigators. Authorities listened to the calls and subsequently charged him with four counts of tampering with a witness. *--- Intruder Cleans Home, Takes Nothing ---* A Massachusetts man said he arrived at his family's home to find someone had broken in and given the residence a good cleaning without stealing anything. Nate Roman, 44, said he returned to his Marlborough home last week with his 5-year-old son and the boy was the first to notice the back door was open. The homeowner said he was shocked to go inside and discover nothing had been taken, but instead the house had been cleaned. "You could smell the cleaning chemicals," he told told local news. "I could tell something was wrong so I started looking around the house, and I found that my bathrooms had been cleaned." Roman said every room had been cleaned -- except for the kitchen. Roman said a clue left behind -- toilet paper folded into origami roses -- lead him to suspect a pro- fessional cleaning service had visited the wrong address. "It was really the roses that really got me thinking that some professional cleaner had accidentally stumbled into my house," Roman said. "If I was going to judge the quality of a toilet paper rose I would call this high quality." *--- 'Shut Up and Drive' ---* It's the nature of technology to evolve, but not all change is good. Take the latest innovation to the Uber app. The new "conversation" allows riders to choose 'quiet preferred', 'happy to chat' or 'no preference' before ordering a car. In a forum for Uber drivers, some categorically decried the change as a violation of free speech, while others said determining a rider's needs can be a source of anxiety. Still others worried about how the feature would affect their ratings. "It feels like they are just turning us into robots," one driver said. "This feature is telling us to just shut up and drive, and as a human being, I don't like being told how to do my job." *--- Couple Finds 80,000 Bees In Their Bedroom Wall ---* A couple in Spain discovered a buzzing sound that was keeping them up at night was caused by 80,000 bees in their bedroom wall. The couple had been mystified by the low humming sound emitting from their wall for two years, until the sound became louder as temperatures in the area rose and they called a local beekeeper for help. "From about three months ago there was an unbearable noise and they didn't know what to do," beehive relocation expert Sergio Guerrero said. "Just imagine!" The experienced beekeeper was shocked that the couple managed to live with the noise for so long. "With a hive that big it's a wonder they didn't have a constant buzz in their ear," he said. "I can't understand how they've been able to live with them for the past two years." *--- When It Pays To Have Spider Insurance ---* Nobody likes spiders, but which would you like less; dealing with a spider in your lap or losing your vehicle in a river? For this Georgia woman the choice was easy. The woman told a state trooper she was trying to back her Kia van down a boat launch on the Etowah River to put her kayak in the water when a spider jumped in her lap. Naturally, she jumped out of the van. The van then rolled into the river, the Georgia State Patrol said. The agency sent a trooper to the boat launch, but by the time the trooper arrived, the van had long slipped out of sight. "She stated that it floated downstream a few feet," a GSP spokesman said. "And within seconds, it was totally submerged." The woman's insurance company will foot the bill for a dive team to locate the van and tow it out of the river. ========================================================= >-->From TheGroaner: dentist: /-----| \-' | Q | )C ~\/\ | \\_ \ | \_77 |\ | ejm 96 |`` \ \ | """ ~ ~ === >This Will Hurt A Little Dentist: "This will hurt a little." Patient: "OK." Dentist: "I've been having an affair with your wife for a while now." -<>- >Only 10 to Live Doctor: "I'm sorry but you suffer from a terminal illness and have only 10 to live." Patient: "What do you mean, 10? 10 what? Months? Weeks?!" Doctor: "Nine." -<>- >What'll Ya Have? I just opened a new restaurant called Karma. There's no menu, we just give you what you deserve. -<>- >Pirate and the Wheel A pirate walks into a bar with a ship's steering wheel hanging from his crotch. The Bartender says, "What the heck is that?" The Pirate says, "Arrrrr, I don't know, but it's drivin' me nuts!" -<>- ________ _jgN########Ngg_ _N##N@@"" ""9NN##Np_ d###P N####p "^^" T#### d###P _g###@F _gN##@P gN###F" d###F 0###F 0###F 0###F "NN@' ___ q###r "" >Q and A Quickies Q: What's the difference between ignorance and apathy? A: I don't know, and I don't care. Q: What did one DNA strand say to the other? A: Does my bum look big in these genes? Q: What's the best part about living in Switzerland? A: Not sure, but the flag is a big plus. Q: Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? A: Because the "P" is silent. Q: Why didn't the lifeguard save the hippie? A: Because he was too far out man! Q: How did the hipster burn his tongue? A: He drank his coffee before it was cool. ========================================================= >-->From CleanLaffs: ('.'''. ()/ ..) o'.__.> _ || _ |\ Oh My (_|\/|_)\ / //| |\\// (( |()\ \/ \\| \ _/_| () \ | \ \_._._.' \\// mrf ))\ // \\ (x\_/x) (_(___) English professors love to catch the errors students make in their term papers, and they love nothing better than to catch mixed metaphors. The "friends and survivors" of Calvin College English department collected this list of mixed metaphors and posted them on their web site: "He swept the rug under the carpet." "She's burning the midnight oil at both ends." "It was so cold last night I had to throw another blanket on the fire." "It's time to step up to the plate and cut the mustard." "She's robbing Peter to pay the piper." "He's up a tree without a paddle." "Beware my friend...you are skating on hot water." "Keep your ear to the grindstone." "Sometimes you've gotta stick your neck out on a limb." "Some people sail through life on a bed of roses like a knife slicing through butter." -<>- Tommy had reached school age. His mother managed with a blast of propaganda to make him enthusiastic about the idea. She bought him lots of new clothes, told him of the new friends he'd meet, and so on. When the first day came, Tommy eagerly went off and came back home with a lot of glowing reports about school. The next morning when his mother woke him up, he asked, "What for?" She told him it was time to get ready for school. "What?" he asked. "Again?" -<>- Marvin found the following ransom note slipped under his front door. "Bring $50,000 to the 17th hole of your country club tomorrow at 10:00 AM if you ever want to see your wife alive again." But it was well after 1:00 PM by the time he arrived at the designated meeting spot. A masked man stepped from behind a bush and demanded, "You're three hours late. What took you so long?" "Give me a break!" said Marvin, pointing to his scorecard. "I'm a 27 handicap." -<>- When a customer left his cell phone in my store, I scrolled through his saved numbers, stopped at "Mom" and pushed send. His mother answered, and I told her what happened. "Don't worry," she said, "I'll take care of it." A few minutes later, the cell phone rang. It was "Mom." "Martin," she said, "you left your cell phone at the convenience store." -<>- .-. __/ ( , '-.____\ u=='/ \ /_/ \ .-'' | ( ____/_____ _>_/.-------- \/// // snd // Hunter was 5-years-old and was staying with his grandfather for a few days. He was playing outside with the other kids when he came into the house and asked, "Grandpa, what's it called when two people sleep in the same bedroom and one is on top of the other?" His Grandpa was a little uncomfortable with the question, but he decided honesty was the best policy. "Well, Hunter, that's called s%xual intercourse." "Oh," Little Hunter said, "OK," and went back outside to play with the other kids. A few minutes later he came back in and said, "Grandpa, it isn't called s%xual intercourse. It's called bunk beds. And Jimmy's mom wants to talk to you." -<>- A classics professor tears his favorite pair of trousers, so he takes them to the Greek tailor in his neighborhood to get them mended. The tailor asks: "Euripides?" The professor replies: "Yes. Eumenides?" ========================================================= >-->From ScreamOfTheCrop: >Quotes: Life is a first draft...with NO rewrite. -- Unknown The Seven Ages of Man Are: spills, drills, thrills, bills, ills, pills, & wills. -<>- ____________________________________________________ |____________________________________________________| | __ __ ____ ___ || ____ ____ _ __ | || |__ |--|_| || |_| |||_|**|*|__|+|+||___| || | | ||==|^^||--| |=||=| |=*=||| |~~|~| |=|=|| | |~||==| | || |##|| | | || | |JRO|||-| | |==|+|+||-|-|~||__| | ||__|__||__|_|_||_|_|___|||_|__|_|__|_|_||_|_|_||__|_| ||_______________________||__________________________| | _____________________ || __ __ _ __ _ | ||=|=|=|=|=|=|=|=|=|=|=| __..\/ | |_| ||#||==| / /| || | | | | | | | | | | |/\ \ \\|++|=| || ||==| / / | ||_|_|_|_|_|_|_|_|_|_|_/_/\_.___\__|_|__||_||__|/_/__| |____________________ /\~()/()~//\ __________________| | __ __ _ _ \_ (_ . _/ _ ___ _____| ||~~|_|..|__| || |_ _ \ //\\ / |=|__|~|~|___| | | | ||--|+|^^|==|1||2| | |__/\ __ /\__| |==|x|x|+|+|=|=|=| ||__|_|__|__|_||_|_| / \ \ / / \_|__|_|_|_|_|_|_|_| |_________________ _/ \/\/\/ \_ _______________| | _____ _ __ |/ \../ \| __ __ ___| ||_____|_| |_|##|_|| | \/ __| ||_|==|_|++|_|-||| ||______||=|#|--| |\ \ o / /| | |~| | | ||| ||______||_|_|__|_|_\ \ o / /_|_|__|_|__|_|_||| |_________ __________\___\____/___/___________ ______| |__ _ / ________ ______ /| _ _ _| |\ \ |=|/ // /| // / / / | / ||%|%|%| | \/\ |*/ .//____//.// /__/__/ (_) / ||=|=|=| __| \/\|/ /(____|/ // / /||~|~|~|__ |___\_/ /________// ________ / / ||_|_|_| |___ / (|________/ |\_______\ / /| |______| / \|________) / / | | >Words You Should Know BLAMESTORMING: Sitting around in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed, and who was responsible. CUBE FARM: An office filled with cubicles. PRAIRIE DOGGING: When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm, and people's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on. MOUSE POTATO: The on-line, wired generation's answer to the couch potato. SITCOMS: (Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage) What yuppies turn into when they have children and one of them stops working to stay home with the kids. STRESS PUPPY: A person who seems to thrive on being stressed out and whiny. SWIPED OUT: an ATM or credit card that has been rendered useless because the magnetic strip is worn away from extensive use. IRRITAINMENT: Entertainment and media spectacles that are annoying but you find yourself unable to stop watching them. The O.J. trials were a prime example. Bill Clinton's shameful video Grand Jury testimony is another. PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE: The fine art of whacking the heck out of an electronic device to get it to work again. YUPPIE FOOD STAMPS: The ubiquitous $20 bills spewed out at ATMs everywhere. Often used when trying to split the bill after a meal, 'We each owe $8, but all anybody's got are yuppie food stamps! GENERICA: Features of the American landscape that are exactly the same no matter where one is, such as fast food joints, strip malls, subdivisions. OHNOSECOND: That miniscule fraction of time in which you realize that you've made a BIG mistake. WOOFYS: Well Off Older Folks. -<>- .-..-. (-o/\o-) /`""``""`\ \ /.__.\ / \ `--` / `) (' , /::::\ , |'.\::::/.'| _| ';::;' |_ (::) || (::) _. "| || |" _(:) '. || .' /::\ '._||_.' \::/ /::::\ /:::\ \::::/ _\:::/ /::::\_.._ _.._ _.._ _.._/::::\ \::::/::::\/::::\/::::\/::::\::::/ jgs `""`\::::/\::::/\::::/\::::/`""` `""` `""` `""` `""` >WORD & PHRASE ORIGINS Column Carl Leonard did the research on his own question and got back to us with a fascinating, complete history, from http://www.word-detective.com/012000.html I then received a similar answer from our Lee Daniel Quinn. TOP NOTCH: Since about 1848 this phrase has meant "first rate" or simply "the best." Evidently, the term "top notch" originated in some sort of game or competition where the score was kept by moving markers upward on a notched board or stick. The winner, presumably would be the one whose marker reached the top notch first, making "top notch" a fitting metaphor for "the best." Ordinarily I'd apologize for the vagueness of that explanation, but it's the best anyone can do today, and the fault really lies with the slackers back in 1848 who neglected to write down precisely what game they were playing. As a sort of consolation prize (I do feel your frustration, I really do), allow me to offer the origin of another term for "the highest quality" or "first class," namely "top drawer." This term, which appeared in its figurative sense around 1900, refers to the top drawer in a bedroom dresser, where society folks usually kept their jewels and other valuables. "Top drawer" as an idiom first described people of high social standing ("Muffy's beau Teddy is from a top drawer family"), but today is usually simply used to denote a thing or service considered the best of its kind." --- ...For More, See our Word/Phrase Origins! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/origins.html ========================================================= >-->FUN Places To Net Visit Chapel Oak http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/oakchapel.html Chevy: American Pride http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/chevypride.html Let's Dance! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/dance.html Hand Painting Art 2 http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/hpaint2.html Naval Fleet Art http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/navalart.html Japan Manhole Cover Art http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/japanart.html Baby Thoughts http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/babythoughts.html Enter At Your Own Risk http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/risky.html Luxury Yacht http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/luxyacht.html Pandas After The Earthquake http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/pandae.html ten Life Tips http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/lifetips.html Taking A Cat Bath http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/catbath.html Dogs As Best Friends http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/bestfriend.html Ocean Exploration http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/ocean.html Pink The Pig-Puppy http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/pigpuppy.html 9/11 And Troops INDEX!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/911andtroopsindex.html -<>- >From LynnLynn's Links: Create printable flyers online http://www.band-flyers.com/ Watch Horror Movies Online For Free http://www.fearnet.com/ -<>- >From Our Friend Linda :) So cute! How they produced this is beyond me......so creative! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=341rybZ42vA --- ...BIG SMILES Here! So darling! Thanks Linda! Just goes to show ya - ya can't believe everything you see! This video is about a song called "Angel Flight." This airplane brings our fallen military home. Listen to the words of the pilot and the tower, and make sure you sit quietly and listen to the very end. You will understand why one of the singers said he would be glad to help with the song... if he could stop crying. Angel Flight http://www.youtube.com/watch_popup?v=70Ikj1hZDnw&feature=related --- ...A sweet One! Thanks Linda! -<>- >From Our Friend PatDeE :) You won’t believe what happens after you draw a stickman! I wish I knew how this works!!! http://www.drawastickman.com/ --- ...LOL! Oh Boy - do I ever draw bad! Fun! Thanks PatDeE! -<>- >From Our Friend KarenF :) A Prediction From 47 Years Ago by Paul Harvey Interesting - Listen to the whole thing http://youtu.be/H3Az0okaHig --- ...Amazing - Thanks KarenF! -<>- >From Our Friend LouiseAu :) 10-year-old Issy Simpson is ready to amaze the judges and audience with her magic on America’s Got Talent 2019 - The Champions. https://youtu.be/EzN0Z2BXcVs Watch 20,000 performers from the Henan Shaolin Tagou Martial Arts School perform the most beautiful and amazingly coordinated moves. https://youtu.be/7x3NZmB8LFQ --- ...Wowsers! Thanks LouiseAu! -<>- >From Our Friend ======================================================= >-->Quotes & Thunkers: "I have tried to know absolutely nothing about a great many things, and I have succeeded fairly well." --Robert Benchley "Standing ovations have become far too commonplace. What we need are ovations where the audience members all punch and kick one another." --George Carlin "There exists a widespread myth that humans should learn about s%x from their parents. My relationship with my father nearly ended when he tried to teach me how to drive. I can't imagine our relationship having survived his instructing me how to have s%x." --Bob Smith "Parents at a Florida school are reportedly outraged after a video surfaced of students in a classroom twerking and giving lap dances. Or as it's called in Florida, Career Day." -Seth Meyers "Yesterday, a brawl broke out at a Florida airport after Spirit Airlines canceled several flights. To restore control, airport police were forced to fire Cinnabons into the crowd." -Conan O'Brien "I read about a coffee shop in Toronto that doesn't have any Wi-Fi to encourage customers to talk to each other. Although all the customers talk about now is how they should really get Wi-Fi in this coffee shop." -Jimmy Fallon "A group is suing Quaker Oats saying their oatmeal is not 100 percent natural. And it gets worse: The guy on the box? He's Jewish." -Conan O'Brien "Scientists have discovered a species of fish that surrounds itself with uglier fish in order to look more attractive. However, scientists could not identify which sorority it belongs to." -Jimmy Fallon "A man in Ireland has created a working Batman outfit with 23 different features. So now he just has to sit back and wait for somebody to murder his parents." -Seth Meyers >Updated FUN STUFF URLS - Oh Yeah Shangy! ---------------------------------------------------------------------- http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/urls.html FUN URLS ---------------------------------------------------------------------- -->ShangyFunList AD RATES: $20 will get your a message (of up to 40 words) out to all self-subscribed readers and $5 more will give you the same message also put up for all web site readers. Email me to secure dates. Ad Request ---------------------------------------------------------------------- -->FULL LENGTH - FREE On line AUDIO MP3 Christian Foundational Class http://www.truthortradition.com/modules.php?name=News&file=article&sid=61 NEW LIFE IN CHRIST! ---------------------------------------------------------------------- -->This is for all you who love food and DARE to make it at home Yep. You guessed it - Recipes. These are Tried and True, Yummy to the Tummy, good old fashioned home cooking recipes that are EASY to do Visit Shangy's Easy-Does-It Home Recipes: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/easy.html Home Recipes >Got A good Recipe? SHARE IT HERE: Share A Recipe ********************************************************************** >TO SUBSCRIBE:Visit Here This Weeks regular Shangy emails OR For the Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com **********************************************************************