Happy Poultry Day! ... :) Shangy! >Here are the details on our Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com To UnSubscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com Group home page: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ShangyFunList or Web Site: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/ShangyFunList.html Group email address: ShangyFunList@yahoogroups.com or email me here: bcrsystems@earthlink.net ================ *~* Please Consider Giving To ShangralaFamilyFun.com The cost of the website has gone up dramatically due to the ever increasingly wonderful pages and photos being added each week to entertain you and our fellow Christian families. While the ads on the website do help, I don't want to drag the site down with tons of them to pay for it. I need your help! "We are each of us angels with but one wing, and can only fly by embracing each other" -Luciano Decrescenzo ~ CALLING ALL CARING ANGELS ~ *~* WE NEED CARING And SHARING Angels *~* >Do You Want To Be A Shangrala Angel? If you'd like to help and be counted as a Shangrala Angel, the easiest way to do that is through online giving. It is easy to use, and most of all, it is secure. Please visit the site, scroll down and click on the donate button. A Secure PAYPAL form page comes up. NOTE: Paypal will generate a 'Quantity 1' and 'Price per item' form. Just ignore the price per item and put whatever it is you desire to give in there. With Paypal, you will have your normal receipt for your 'payment' donation in USD (United States Dollars). You can put a memo in there if you'd like. EVERY LITTLE BIT WILL HELP! Any amount is greatly appreciated and needed! PLEASE Visit Shangrala to Help: http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/index.html OR If you'd rather send us a donation, Please MAIL it here: Elrhea Bigham 502 S. Harrison Van Wert, OH 45891 *~* THANK YOU! MAY GOD BLESS YOU MOST ABUNDANTLY FOR YOUR GIFT! ================ *~* A REMINDER: PLEASE Send me sweet, interesting, funny, inspiring, family type forwards ANY TIME here... bcrsystems@earthlink.net I Need them, Love them, Use them, and Share them! THANK YOU!! AND For Facebook Users: Please Friend Me / Like Me here... http://tinyurl.com/cma6all AND For Google Plus Users: You can find me here... Shangy Bigham https://plus.google.com/106648555948034085752/posts AND Please Share This email with All Your Friends And Family! ^~^ May God SUPER BLESS You As You Do! THANK YOU! :) -<>- * NOTE: An easy way to adjust the size of print in email or any page is to hold down the Ctrl tab while moving the scroll button on the mouse. You can also use the keyboard to change the font size in your web browser or emails. Hold down the Ctrl key while pressing the + key for larger text or the - key for smaller text! ================ >-->HOT Off The 'Shangy' Press :) Our super hot new page is from our friends Linda and Bunni. With Spring right around the corner, it is one to lift our spirits and get us out of the gloomy gray of winter. Be sure to check this one out here... _._ .' '. / \ ___ _.. _.--. | / |.' `'. ;-._ .' `\ .' `\ \| / \ .' `\/ ; / _ \.=..=./ _.' / | `\.---._| '. .-'-.}`.<>.`{-'-. / .--; . ( .' '. \ .---.{ <>()<> }.--..-' / _ \_ './ _. `-./ _},'<>`.{_ `\ ( = \ )`""'\;--. .' .-'/ )=..=;`\`- \ {= (| ) /`. ( / /| \ ) ( =_/ )__..-\ .'-..___.' : '.___..-' \ }/ / ;.____.-;/\ | ` | '--' | .' | \ \ /'. _.' \ ' / |\.\ ; /`--.-' ) .'`-. / \ \ |`| /__.-' \_.'jgs \ \ |-| Beautiful Flowers 2 http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/bflowers2.html --- ...So vibrant! Thanks Ladies! ======================================================= >-->From SmileZilla: ,.,. ((((^)) d e_# b \._./ ,---i`-'i---. / | `-' | \ |__| |__| \ | | | \ \______ | | \/ ) \|| \ |- | |'//\ |___|___| | | | ( | ) {_ |__| (__|__} _>= | =<_ hjw (__._|_.__) A woman wanted to reach her husband on his mobile phone but discovered that she was out of credit, she instructed her son - to use his own phone to pass across an urgent message to daddy who is at work. After junior had called, he got back to his mother to inform her that it was a lady that picked up his Dad's phone the three times he tried reaching dad on the mobile. She waited impatiently for her husband to return from work, immediately she sighted him, she gave him a very hot slap, while the man was trying to ask why? She repeated the slap, people from neighborhood rushed around to know the cause of this. The man asked their son to tell everybody what the lady said to him when he called, the son said "The number you are trying to call is not reachable at the moment. Please try again later." -<>- A guy was lost on the Mall by the Washington Monument. He stopped a policeman and asked, "What side is the State Department on?" The cop answered: "Ours, I hope." -<>- >You Might be an Internet Hobo if 1. You spend more time online trying to find a way of making money than actually making money. 2. You have more than one degree from an online university. 3. Your little black book is full of usernames and passwords. 4. Your space is Myspace. 5. You think a vacation is Google Earth. 6. Your 15 minutes of fame is on Youtube. 7. Road rage means a dial up connection. 8. You hear your kids say "the snail man's here". ======================================================= +------------ BIZARRE HOLIDAYS ------------+ March 19 is Poultry Day March 20 is International Earth Day, Extraterrestrial Abductions Day, Proposal Day, National Agriculture Day, Spring (Vernal) Equinox and Tea for Two Tuesday March 21 is Credit Card Reduction Day and Fragrance Day March 22 is National Goof Off Day, Melba Toast Day, and National Chip and Dip Day March 23 is National Puppy Day and Near Miss Day March 24 is National Chocolate Covered Raisin Day March 25 is Feast of the Assumption, Pecan Day, Palm Sunday - date varies and Waffle Day ======================================================= >-->From GoodCleanFun: ,``'.' / \ \ \ / \ | | ''''''.| | | `````'` | | | /'''' - (| | | /'``` . | | | / ''''' / ./ / '```` / |/ / ''''`| \/ / ' |` / / / /| /| | / '. || | ) ++ | \ | | | | \ .. \ _/ \ ' ./ | / \ | \ \ | \ | | . | | | | | | | | | | | .| | / / | / / / | | / / | | / / | | ==/ | | | | ==/ | | / | \ | Pru | | V | | V >Golf Couple "You think so much of your game that you don't even remember when we got married," complained the wife. "Of course I do honey," the husband said. "It was the day after I sank that 40-foot putt." -<>- >The Golf Bag About four or five years ago I was standing in a ticket line at LAX, and a fellow in a line parallel to mine had a golf bag slung over his shoulder. Since the line was long and airline ticketing is a slow process at best, we struck up a conversation. He brightened when I admired his golf bag, and he proudly stated that he was on the PGA Tour. Then he turned to me and asked the question all golfers ask: "Do you play?" I shook my head, "I used to, but I quit because I wasn't very good. I shot consistently in the lower seventies." There was a long, low in-take of breath, then "The lower seventies?" "Yes," I admitted. "Consistently?" he queried admiringly. "Every hole," I confessed. -<>- >Doctor Appointment I called my doctor's office and said, " I need an appointment with the doctor." Receptionist replied, "Let me check" ... (computer beeping noises) .... " How about 10 tomorrow." I said, "No thanks, I don't need that many." -<>- >Prenatal Visit A man and his pregnant wife took their six-year-old daughter with them for the wife's prenatal visit. Later, while leaving the doctor's office, the father told his daughter, "Everything is fine and you'll be having a baby brother in a few months." Not wanting to wait for her new sibling, she asked, "Daddy, if you pay for the baby now, can we take him home today?" -<>- >Tough Steak After sawing at his steak with no effect, a restaurant patron called the waiter over and complained about the tough piece of meat. The waiter looked at the customer's plate and announced, "I am very sorry, but I can't take it back because you have already bent it." ========================================================= >-->From BackYardChickenCoops: _ .-. .--''` ) _ | |/` .-'` ( `\ /` _) _. -'._ /` .' .-.-; `).' / \ \ (`, \_o/_o/__ / .-''` ``'-. { /` ,___.--''` { ; '-. \ \ _ _ { |'-....-`'.\_\ / './ '. \ \ `"` _ \ \ | \ \ ( '-.J \_..----.._ __) `\--..__ .-` ` `\ ''--...--. (_,.--""`/` .- `\ .__ _) | ( } .__ _) \_, '. }_ - _.' \_, '. } `'--' '._. ,_) / | / .' \ | _ .-' \__/;--.||-' _|| _||__ __ _ __.-` "`)(` `" ```._) jgs (_`,- ,-' `''-. '-._) ( ( / '.__.' `"`'--' >Happy Poultry Day :) Q: Did you hear about the chicken who could only lay eggs in the winter? A: She was no spring chicken. ------- ~-. ,,,; ~-.~-.~- (.../ ~-.~-.~-.~-.~-. } o~`, ~-.~-.~-.~-.~-.~-. (/ \ ~-.~-.~-.~-.~-.~-.~-. ; \ ~-.~-.~-.~-.~-.~-.~-. ; {_.~-.~-.~-.~-.~-.~-.~ ;: .-~` ~-.~-.~-.~-.~-. ;.: :' ._ ~-.~-.~-.~-.~- ;::`-. '-._ ~-.~-.~-.~- ;::. `-. '-,~-.~-.~-. ';::::.`''-.-' ';::;;:,:' '||" / | ~` ~"' mic A librarian was very sad and alone in the library one day as there was no one around for her to help. These two chickens came through the door screeching “bouk bouk.” The librarian quickly got up and gave them each 5 books. The two chickens left satisfied. Just a few minutes later the same two chickens come through the door with no books screeching “bouk bouk.” The librarian once again jumped up and gave each chicken 15 books this time. The chickens leave satisfied once again. Then for the third time the chickens returned screeching “bouk bouk”, but this time being suspicious the librarian gave each chicken only one book and explained that they could only borrow more books once that had returned the others. As the chickens left the librarian slowly followed behind to see where all the chickens and the books were going. The chickens came to a stop by a pond and started throwing the books into the water. Appalled the librarian ran forward to tell them to stop but she suddenly noticed there were some frogs in the pond grabbing the books and throwing them back croaking behind “red-it… red-it”. ------- ,~. ,-'__ `-, {,-' `. } ,') ,( a ) `-.__ ,',')~, <=.) ( `-.__,==' ' ' '} ( ) / `-'\ , ) | \ `~. / \ `._ \ / \ `._____,' / `-. ,' `-. ,-' `~~~~' //_|| __//--'/` hjw ,--'/` ' ' Q: Why does a chicken coop have two doors? A: Because if had four doors it would be a chicken sedan! ------- A man was driving along a freeway when he noticed a chicken running alongside his car. He was amazed to see the chicken keeping up with him, as he was doing 50 mph. He accelerated to 60, and the chicken stayed right next to him. He sped up to 75 mph, and the chicken passed him. The man noticed that the chicken had three legs. So, he followed the chicken down a road and ended up at a farm. He got out of his car and saw that all the chickens had three legs. He asked the farmer, “what’s up with these chickens?” The farmer said, “Well, everybody likes chicken legs, so I bred a three- legged bird. I’m going to be a millionaire.” The man asked him how they tasted. The farmer said, “don’t know, haven’t caught one yet.” ------- xx / .|_ /(_)_< --- cack cack! / ( ((____.-' ) \\ / \'-.-.-'`/ -Miss.Kitty- _ \______/ (_) _|_\_ '''''''''''''''' Psychiatrist: What seems to be the problem? Patient: I think I’m a chicken. Psychiatrist: How long has this been going on? Patient: Ever since I came out of my shell. ------- Q: What do you call a scary chicken? A: A poultrygeist. ------- A man runs to the psychiatrist and says, “Doctor, you’ve got to help me. My wife thinks she’s a chicken!” The psychiatrist asks, “How long has she had this condition?” “Two years,” says the man. “Then why did it take you so long to come and see me?” asked the psychiatrist. The man shrugs his shoulders and replies, “We needed the eggs.” ------- .-"-. / _ \ | / \ | _|_|_|_|_ "--...-". . "---...--jro"" . . . . (( // _ ('< <') _ . . . \ | /|) (|\ | / \|.'/: :\`.|/ . `._.' `._.' . . || . <| . . . ^^. ^ . . "Yeah, well, I couldn't take anymore, so I told the big bully he could just go and cluck himself." Q: Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in the mud and cross the road again? A: Because he was a dirty double-crosser! Q: What do you call a chicken in a shellsuit? A: An egg! ------- .".".". (` `) _.-=-. '._.--.-; .-` -' '. .-'`.o ) \ / .-_.--' `\ `;---) \ ; / / ;' _-_.-' ` `;"` ; \ ; . .' _-' \ ( ) | | / .-.-' -` '-.-' \ | .' ` '.-'-\` /_./\_.|\_\ ; ' .'-'.-. / '-._ \` / _;-, | .-=-.;-._ \ -'-, \ / `";`-`,-"`) \ \ '-- `\.\ '. '._ '-- '--'/ `-._ `'----'`; `"""--.____,/ \\ \ // /` ___// /__ jgs (`(`(---"-`) The farmer’s son was returning from the market with the crate of chickens his father had entrusted to him, when all of a sudden the box fell and broke open. Chickens scurried off in different directions, but the determined boy walked all over the neighborhood scooping up the wayward birds and returning them to the repaired crate. Hoping he had found them all, the boy reluctantly returned home, expecting the worst. “Pa, the chickens got loose,” the boy confessed sadly, “but I managed to find all twelve of them.” “Well, you did real well son,” the farmer beamed. “You left with seven.” ------ // __ ww_ ___./// W._`\._ o__ `._.-''''' // |/ \ `-._._._.-// |/ \ , / // _ \ `.__.' _// \ ``,,,' _// `v'\_`-. \--' _ `-. \--' .'`. .^.`.. \_/_/ <'\-_// \_/_/ `.,' .' `. '` // \\ `-.-' \\\\ '`_'` -'` -'` '' AsH ,,','` AsH ' ` A kid was walking around his neighborhood trying to sell chocolate bars to raise money for his school. He walked up to the first house which was a beautiful Mansion, only to find an Orpington answering the door. The boy asked if the owners were home however the Orpington’s only reply was “buk-buk-buk”. The boy decided to move on to the next building which was a Penthouse at the top of an enormous skyscraper. The bellhop let the boy upstairs after he explained his cause, went up the elevator, knocked on the door and once again a small little Silkie chicken answered. The boy asked if the owners were home again but once again the silkie chicken went “buk-buk-buk” before quickly closing the door. Finally, the boy walked on to the next house which just happened the be the Taj Mahal. The boy walked along the beautiful gardens, amazed that he hadn’t seen this house on his street before. The boy knocked on the door and was greeted by a wise, old Rhode Island Red. The boy turned his back without saying a word, but the Rhode Island Red called out to him – “how can I help you young man”. The boy was stunned to be talking to a chicken and he mumbled, “why are there so many chickens living in the neighborhood”. The Rhode Island Red chuckled to himself before saying, “young man, these aren’t human houses, these are chicken coops”. ,. (\(\) ,_ ; o > {`-. / (_) `={\`-._____/` | `-{ / -=`\ | `={ -= = _/ / `\ .-' /` {`-,__.'===,_ //` `\\ jgs // `\= See them here https://www.backyardchickencoops.com.au/ ========================================================= >-->From Our Friend LouiseAu :) __________ / \ _ / \ //\./\ / \ || | / \ \\ / ~| |~~~~~~~~|| |~~~~~ /*| |*******/ | |****/ /*/ \------ / /***/ /*/ \_____/ /***/ /*/_______________________________/***/ /*************************************/ /*************************************/ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ -Kevin Ballard >SMILES "May I take your order?" the waiter asked. "Yes, how do you prepare your chickens?" "Nothing special, sir," he replied. "We just tell them straight out that they're going to die." -------- Learning that several of his employees were tanking up on no-trace vodka Martinis during lunch hours, a wise company president issued the following memo: To all employees: If you must drink during lunch, please drink whiskey. It is much better for our customers to know you're drunk than to think you're stupid. -------- One day I decided to take my three children to an ice skating party in a nearby town, but after several wrong turns and stops to ask directions, I pulled over to the side of the road, and suggested we all ask God to help us find the rink. When we finally arrived, we were nearly an hour late. The following week, as we got into the car to go skating again, my five-year-old son exclaimed, "Mom, let's pray now and save time!" -------- Alan and Sandra lived on a cove at Gull Lake Alberta. It was early winter and the lower portion of the cove had frozen over. Alan asked Sandra if she would walk across the frozen part of the cove to the general store, get him some smokes and beer. She asked him for some money, but he told her, "Nah, just put it on our tab. Old man Stacey won't mind." Sandra, being the good wife, walked across the ice, got the smokes and beer at the store, Then she walked back home across the cove. When she got home with the items she remarked, "Alan, you always tell me not to run up the tab at Stacey's store. Why didn't you just give me some money?" Alan replied, "Well, Sandra, I didn't want to send you out there with cash -- I wasn't sure how thick the ice was!" -------- A kindergarten teacher asked her students to bring something related to their religion class. At the appropriate time... she asked the students to come forward and share with the rest of the class. The first child said, "I am a Muslim and this is my prayer rug." The second student said, "I am Jewish and this is my Star of David." The third child said, I am a Catholic and this is my rosary." The final child said, "I am a Baptist and this is cross and my casserole dish!" -------- A blonde goes to the doctor with both of her ears and her right hand are burned. "Sit down and tell me how it happened," says the doctor. "I was ironing my clothes when I received a call. Instead of picking up the phone, I picked up the iron and burned my ear." "'What about the other ear and your hand?" "I tried to call for an ambulance." ---------- A man was on his way home with a new car, which was absorbing all his attention, when it struck him that he had forgotten something. Twice he stopped, counted his parcels, searched his pockets, but finally decided he had everything with him. Yet the feeling persisted. When he reached home his daughter ran out, stopped short, and cried: "Daddy, where's Mommy?" ---------- As the passengers settled in on a West Coast commuter flight a flight attendant announced, "We'd like you folks to help us welcome our new co-pilot. He'll be performing his first commercial landing for us today, so be sure to give him a big round of applause when we come to a stop." The plane made an extremely bumpy landing, bouncing hard two or three times before taxiing to a stop. Still, the passengers applauded. Then the attendant's voice came over the intercom, "Thanks for flying with us. And don't forget to let our co-pilot know which landing you liked best." ---------- The young boy was spending a Sunday afternoon with his grandpa. Looking at pictures of his grandpa in his military uniform, the boy asked, "Grandpa, did you ever kill anyone in the war?" "No champ, I never did." "That's a good thing." "You're telling me," began grandpa, "I was the cook!" ---------- Doctor Titus, who was known for miraculous cures for arthritis, had a waiting room full of people when a little old lady, completely bent over in half, shuffled in slowly, leaning on her cane. When her turn came, she went into the doctor's office, and, amazingly, emerged within 5 minutes walking completely erect with her head held high. A woman in the waiting room who had seen all this walked up to the little old lady and said, "It's a miracle! You walked in bent in half and now you're walking erect. What did that doctor do?" "Gave me a longer cane." ------- _\|/_ /--\ |[]| _] \/ [_ /_ `==' _\ \\| |// l\ __/j `|-'##| |#||#| |#||#| _|#||#|_ `==" "==` as >MEN BASHING Q. How many honest, intelligent, caring men in the world does it take to do the dishes? A. Both of them. Q. How does a man show that he is planning for the future? A. He buys two cases of beer. Q. What is the difference between men and government bonds? A. The bonds mature. Q. Why are blonde jokes so short? A. So men can remember them. Q. How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper? A. We don't know; it has never happened. Q. Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good-looking? A. They already have boyfriends. Q. What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night? A. A widow. Q. Why are married women heavier than single women? A. Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed. Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge. Q. What is the one thing that all men at singles bars have in common? A. They're married. --- ...Oh My! HaHa! Thanks LouiseAu! -<>- snow canon; `when snowmen rage' ' ( __ ) L_.) | | ` . | | *' __ _| | _ | ( "> ( | | _)_\_ | / \ \| | ___ ( "> | __ ( '.\ ________________________ )| | _________ / \_| / _________ `\\ ) ( '. ) \_<,--.____() /|`<' / . ( .o_ ( - )-' ( | | \ oOOO) `--' <|_+| `--- oOOOO() /| )- a:f ---.___ '-' >Snow Fun (in a PC world with snowflakes)! o \ o `. o o o o \ ` -. .-.-. .---. .-.,-.,-. ..-. / )| | `'____\' o _____\|| ` `' | |-._--.| |----.| | o |o ||-.| ||,-. || | o o | ||_|| |/ oo\ || | | || || C ._)o || | o o| || ||o|\`-/ || | ,. o | ||_|| ,'\,\ || | _\('') | ||o||/\ \ .: o|| | (; .) | || |( \_\||___|| | _,.(|___)-. | o||_|||`-`,\)----' | o o | | ||..|.| o _ |-. _.-. `.-.|._|_.-:|__|_|-.-' `-'.__ o o '--`-` o - SSt It's been snowing all night. So the morning goes like this; 8:00 I made a snowman. 8:10 A feminist passed by and asked me why I didn't make a snow woman. 8:15 So, I made a snow woman. 8:17 The nanny of the neighbors complained about the snow woman's voluptuous chest. 8:20 The gay couple living nearby grumbled that it could have been two snowmen instead. 8:25 The vegans at No. 12 complained about the carrot nose, as veggies are food and not to decorate snow figures with. 8:28 I am being called a racist because the snow couple is white. 8:31 The Muslim gent across the road wants the snow woman to wear a headscarf. 8:40 Someone calls the cops who show up to see what's going on. 8:42 I am told that the broomstick of the snowman needs to be removed because it could be used as a deadly weapon. Things get worse after I mutter : "Yeah, if it's up your a***" 8:45 Local TV news crew shows up. I am asked if I know the difference between snowmen and snow-women? I reply, "Snowballs" and am called a s@%ist. 8:52 My phone is seized and thoroughly checked while I am being blindfolded and flown to the police station in a helicopter. 9:00 I'm on the news as a suspected terrorist bent on stirring up trouble during this difficult weather. 9:10 I am asked if I have any accomplices. 9:29 A little known jihadist group has claimed it was their plot. Moral: There is no moral to this story. It's just the America we live in today! --- ...LOL! So much for freedom! Thanks LouiseAu! ========================================================= >-->From Our Friend Geniann :) ///"\ |6 6| \ - / .@@@. __) (__ @6 6@/ \./ \ @ = @ : : : \ _) (_'| : |) ) /' \./ '\ : |_/ / /\ _ /\ \=o==|) \ \ ) (/ /%|%%' '7/ \7%%|%%' | |`%%|%%' | |`%%|%%' | | %%|%% |_.._| /_|_\ pjb >Jokes After being married for 50 years, I took a careful look at my wife one day and said, "Fifty years ago we had a cheap house, a junk car, slept on a sofa bed and ...watched a 10-inch black and white TV, but I got to sleep with a hot 23-year-old girl every night. Now, I have a $500,000 home, a $45,000 car, a nice big bed and a large screen TV, but I'm sleeping with a 69-year-old woman. It seems to me that you're not holding up your side of things." My wife is a very reasonable woman. She told me to go out and find a hot 23-year-old girl and she would make sure that I would once again be living in a cheap house, driving a junk car, sleeping on a sofa bed and watching a 10-inch black and white TV. Aren't older women great? They really know how to solve an old guy's problems. ------- _ (_) H _ _ H (o)_(o) _ H ( ^_^ ) (_) H.---...__ ;---: H H| `-._ (_(.)_) H H`. `\ (O)_(O) H H--=============+----------------------------------------.H H%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%|Z7Z7Z7i _ _ _ i*_*_*_*i|L|L|L|i@_@_@_@i/ H H%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%|######i%%%%%%%i @ @ @ i*******i&&&&&&&/`-H H---------------|######i%%%%%%%i@ @ @ @i*******i&&&&&&/ @ H H_______________|######i%%%%%%%i @ @ @ i*******i&&&&&/@ @H H `~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`.@ H H `--H (_) (_) '-' kat '-' This woman decides to buy a new bed that you have to assemble yourself. Back home she reads the instructions carefully and assembles the bed in the bedroom. It looks really neat. Then, a train passes and the whole bed collapses. Thinking that she must have done something wrong she rereads the instructions and reassembles the bed. Then, a train passes and the bed collapses again. Now, fed up she calls customer service. She is told that this is quite impossible and that they'll send along a technician to have a look. The technician arrives and assembles the bed. Then, a train passes and the bed collapses. Completely baffled by this unexpected event, the technician decides to reassemble the bed and get inside it to see whether he can find out what causes the bed to collapse. At this point, the woman's husband comes home, sees the bed and says: "That's a nice looking bed", and pulls back the covers, discovering the technician there. "What are you doing?," the husband demands... The technician says. . . "You may find this hard to believe, but I'm just laying here waiting for the next train." ------- A Cajun named, Jean Paul, moved to Texas and bought a donkey from an old farmer named Ben for $100. The farmer agreed to deliver the donkey the next day. The next day, Ben drove up and said, "Sorry, but I have some bad news. The donkey died." "Well, then, just give me the money back," said Jean Paul "Can't do that. I went and spent it already." Replied Ben "OK, then. Just unload the donkey," said Jean Paul. "What ya going to do with him?" asked Ben. "I'm going to raffle him off," said Jean Paul. "You can't raffle off a dead donkey!" uttered Ben. "Sure can. Watch me. I just won't tell that he's dead," said Jean Paul. A month later Ben met up with the Cajun and asked, "What happened with that dead donkey?" "I raffled him off, I did. I sold 500-hunderd tickets at two dollars apiece and made a profit of $898," said Jean Paul. "Didn't anyone complain?" inquired Ben. "Just the guy who won. So I gave him his two dollars back,” said Jean Paul. ------- >What gender is 'computer'?" The men's group decided that "computer" should definitely be of the feminine gender because: 1. No one but their creator understands their internal logic. 2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else. 3. Even the smallest mistakes are stored in long term memory for possible later retrieval; and 4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it. The women's group, however, concluded that computers should be masculine because: 1. In order to do anything with them, you have to turn them on. 2. They have a lot of data but still can't think for themselves. 3. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time, they ARE the problem; and 4. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you had waited a little longer, you could have gotten a better model. --- ...Oh Gee! HaHa! Thanks Geniann! ======================================================= >-->In The Worldly News: Joe diGenova: Obama Administration's "Brazen Plot To Exonerate Hillary Clinton" Is A Felony https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=2&v=aa95jLxZfc4 Latest From Justice With Judge Jeanine 3/17/18 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cFl5dQsXTVo Latest from Hannity https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dVP_xNT4axA Latest from Laura Ingraham https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L_zr6jgBG9o WhiteHouseNews: https://www.whitehouse.gov/1600daily/ Latest From AFA: http://tinyurl.com/j7lakqw Latest From RightAlerts: http://rightalerts.com Latest At FoxNews: http://www.foxnews.com/ Latest From MRC News: https://tinyurl.com/ya6uruck Latest From TrueDailyNews: http://truedaily.news/category/news/ Get your free digital Guide to the Constitution from The Heritage Foundation https://tinyurl.com/ycnjzfgg -<>- >From BizarreNews: Now here's a kid with a real future. Most 14-year-old boys are content to play video games, look for porn online and just be generally socially awkward. But one young man in California found a much more bizarre way to amuse himself. The Victorville Police Department have identified a 14-year- old who has been dressing up as a police officer and pulling over drivers. According to police he was driving a white Ford Explorer with red and blue emergency lights mounted on the inside of the front windshield. The Explorer had no law enforce- ment or another type of identifying markers other than the emergency lights and had no license plates. In one incident the boy pulled up to a residence with the lights flashing and exited the vehicle wearing a San Bernardino County Sheriff's Department uniform with a firearm in the belt holster. He went to the front door and told the occupants he was there to investigate a reported domestic disturbance. The homeowner informed him there was no problem and they had not placed a call to the police. The imposter tried to open the door but the homeowner had locked it. Finally he returned to his Explorer and left. Later, the homeowner notified the police of the suspicious encounter. In another incident the boy actually initiated a traffic stop. After obtaining the driver's information, he gave her a warning and let her go. That was nice of him. Remember, this kid is 14. Eventually an actual police officer saw a Ford Explorer matching the description of that involved in these bizarre incidents. He conducted a traffic stop on the vehicle and confirmed it was a match. During a search of the juvenile's home, detectives found the uniform worn during the incident as well as a large amount of counterfeit money, simulation firearms, ballistic vests, and other law enforcement related items. Detectives also learned the boy pulled over two additional people the same night, posing as a law enforcement officer. There are more questions to this story than answers. Where does a 14-year-old get counterfeit money and ballistic vests? Why was he posing as law enforcement in the first place? And how gullible are Californians that they are handing over their drivers licenses to 14-year-olds? Still, pretty impressive for someone who's not old enough to shave yet. -<>- A woman is suing a Florida restaurant for $1.5 million, alleging she suffered injuries as a result of an encounter with a drag performer's fake breasts. Neldin Molina's lawsuit against the Hamburger Mary's eatery in Tampa states she was dining with friends and family members at the eatery to celebrate a friend's birthday. The lawsuit alleges she was unaware of the drag show until it began during her meal and she watched for a short time before turning her back to the stage to eat and socialize with her fellow diners. The suit claims a performer identified as Amanda D'Hod pointed at Molina when she turned around again and began to walk toward her table. Molina alleges she turned her back to the performer to signal she did not want to draw attention to herself, but the drag queen allegedly grabbed her by the head and "wiggled her breast against the Plaintiff's face and head." The performer then "violently" pounded Molina's face against the fake breast "up to nine times." That's the risk you run when you go to those kinds of places. Molina said she felt an immediate headache and neck pain after the encounter and later visited the emergency room at Memorial Hospital of Tampa for "excruciating cervical pain and uncontrollable headaches." Which immediately makes me wonder what was in that fake breast; ball bearings? So the lesson here seems to be; never turn your back on a cross-dressing performer. They can smell fear. *----- Bobcat Seized in Illinois Gun Raid -----* Like Dante said in the movie 'Grandma's Boy', 'Dude, you can get past a dog. Nobody f**ks with a lion.' Police in Orland Park, IL said Lynxie the bobcat was found in a small office at a shuttered storefront where they seized a cache of guns and arrested the exotic animal's owner, Philip Giese, on a charge of unlawful possession of firearms by a felon and illegal possession of a wild animal. The Illinois Department of Natural Resources said the bobcat, which cannot be released back into the wild due to its front paws being declawed, is being kept at an undisclosed approved facility while the investigation is ongoing. Tammy Thies, founder and president of the Wildcat Sanctuary in Sandstone, Minn., said her facility, as well as similar rescue groups, are willing to take Lynxie in once a judge determines it is time to find the animal a permanent home. Thies said it isn't uncommon for exotic animals seized in similar investigations to be kept in "witness protection." She said most bobcats kept as pets end up homeless when they become adults. *- Till Death Do We Part Doesn't Need Any Help -* What was supposed to be the happiest day of her life turned into a nightmare for a bride in Arizona, and those people she injured. Police did not say why 32-year-old Amber Young, who was wearing her wedding gown, chose to drive herself to her own wedding. On her way to the wedding, Young lost control of her car and caused a three-vehicle crash on her way to her wedding. Officers who arrived at the scene discovered that Young was intoxicated. She was arrested and on a DUI charge. Scott posted a photo on Twitter, showing the blonde-haired bride being placed in the squad car with her arms behind her back in handcuffs. The arresting officer posted: "Don't drive impaired, till death do we part doesn't need any help." *-------------------- Russia --------------------* A plane's cargo ramp was damaged during takeoff in Russia, causing gold, platinum and diamonds to be spread from the runway to up to 16 miles from the airport. The Investigative Committee of Russia said the Nimbus Airlines AN-12 cargo plane was carrying $378 million worth of gold, platinum and diamonds when it took off. The plane's cargo ramp was some- how damaged during takeoff, causing gold to litter the runway and precious materials to rain down behind the vehicle for up to 16 miles before the plane made an emergency landing. Police cordoned off the airport's runway and authorities began a search of the grounds and the plane's path to recover the missing materials. Investigators said they have detained the technical engineers who prepared the plane for takeoff. *---------------- Jesus Returns ----------------* A package that was initially thought to be suspicious at a New Jersey church turned out to be something surprising -- a baby Jesus statue stolen 90 years ago. The Rev. Alex Santora of the Our Lady of Grace Church in Hoboken said staff were concerned when a mysterious package showed up at the building without a return address, so he decided to contact police as a precaution. Once the box was found to be clear of heat readings, an officer opened the box and revealed the contents -- a baby Jesus statue and a note explaining the item. The note read: "To Whom it may concern, My Mom told me that the Baby Jesus had been stolen from the church Nativity display at Our Lady of Grace when she was a young girl of about twelve years of age in the early 1930's. It came into her father's possession somehow, and I don't know why he didn't return it. Instead, he gave it to my Mother after she was married, and she too kept it until her passing when it came to me. Knowing the story, I felt it should be returned to the rightful owner, and you will find it enclosed." Santora applauded the sender's drive to do the right thing. ========================================================= >-->From TheGroaner: /| |\ ; : : : | Y, ,P | | Yb. __ ,dP | l\ YMMb,_ _,/ \,_ _,dMMP /f j; `YMMP' `--' `YMMP' ;j : \ YP`-._ _.-'YP / ; \ `\, _,\_ _/,_ ,/' / `,_, \`o> Q and A Quickies Q: Why do dragons sleep during the day? A: So they can fight knights! Q: Why couldn't the pirate play cards? A: Because he was sitting on the deck! Q: What do 90 year old people smell like? A: Depends! Q: How does the man in the moon eat his food? A: In satellite dishes. Q: Why did the cow go in the spaceship? A: It wanted to see the mooooooon! Q: How do chickens get strong? A: Egg-cersize. -<>- /^\/^\ _|__| O| \/ /~ \_/ \ \____|__________/ \ \_______ \ `\ \ \ | | \ / / \ -Bob Allison- / / \\ / / \ \ / / \ \ / / _----_ \ \ / / _-~ ~-_ | | ( ( _-~ _--_ ~-_ _/ | \ ~-____-~ _-~ ~-_ ~-_-~ / ~-_ _-~ ~-_ _-~ ~--______-~ ~-___-~ >Snake Goes to the Doctor A old snake goes to see his Doctor. "Doc, I need something for my eyes... can't see well these days". The Doc fixes him up with a pair of glasses and tells him to return in 2 weeks. The snake comes back in 2 weeks and tells the doctor he's very depressed. Doc says, "What's the problem... didn't the glasses help you?" "The glasses are fine doc, I just discovered I've been living with a water hose the past 2 years!" -<>- >Playing Doctor Two married men are in a pub discussing their love life when one says, "Have you ever tried playing doctor?" His buddy says, "No. What's it like?" The man replies, "It's amazing. Me and my wife were playing for about 10 hours." His buddy, shocked says, "10 hours!? How the heck did you manage that long?" "I just left her in waiting room for 9 and a half hours." -<>- C (\. \ ,/) \( |\ )/ //\ | \ /\\ (/ /\_#oo#_/\ \) \/\ #### /\/ `##' Ojo >An Old Curse An old man goes to the Wizard to ask him if he can remove a curse he has been living with for the last 40 years. The Wizard says, "Maybe, but you will have to tell me the exact words that were used to put the curse on you." The old man says without hesitation - "I now pronounce you man and wife." ========================================================= >-->From CleanLaffs: () `.. .. `... `.. `.... `.. `.. ()-'`-. `.. `..`. `.. `.. `.. `.. `.. `.. `| |\\ `.. `.. `.. `..`.. `..`.. `. `.. ' |__| \) `.. `.. `.. `..`.. `..`.. `.. `.. . //\\__ `.. `.. `. `..`.. `..`.. `. `.. `.. (( `--( `.. `..`.. `. .. `.. `.. `. `. `.... . )\ `.. .. `.. `.. `.... `.. `.. ,--._ ` ,-'`- ;-. `.. `.. `. `.. `.. ,: , `. `. `.. `. .. `.. `.. /. ` ,-' . \ `. `.. `. `.. `.. `.. ( ; `. ) `... `. `.. `.. `.. `.. | ' , `. | `. `.. `...... `.. `.. `.. ( / . ( ) `. `. `.. `.. `.. `.. \ ) `/ `.... `.. `.. `..`........`........ `. / ' ,' `-:_ _,-' Consider yourself hit by a snowball !! `--' -shimrod Heavy snow had buried my van in our driveway. My husband, Scott, dug around the wheels, rocked the van back and forth and finally pushed me free. I was on the road when I heard an odd noise. I got on my cell and called home. "Thank God you answered," I said when Scott picked up. "There's this alarming sound coming under the van. For a minute I thought I was dragging you down the highway." "And you didn't stop?" -<>- I was waiting tables at a country club when an elegantly dressed woman spilled Manhattan clam chowder all over her white linen skirt. She began furiously dabbing at it with a napkin. Having plenty of experience with getting out feed stains, I asked, "Can I bring you some club soda?" "Young lady," she barked, "I'll be the judge of when I've had enough to drink. Bring me another martini!" -<>- Walking home one night, this guy hears a, "Psst! Psst!-give me a hand with this pig would you?" Looking into the shadows the guy sees his neighbor holding onto a restless and agitated pig. "What are you planning to do with that?" he asks. "I'm carrying it indoors and putting in the bath tub." "Why do you wanna' do a thing like that?" "Well, you see, it's my wife. She is one of those women who knows EVERYTHING! I tell her that the price of petrol has shot up again...she says I know! I tell her there is more trouble in the East again ... she says I know! I tell her Francis down the street is getting a divorce and she knows that, too. Well, tomorrow morning, since she always gets up before me, I'll wait for her to come running to me screaming 'THERE'S A PIG IN THE BATH! THERE'S A PIG IN BATH!'" And I'll just turn to her and say, "Yeah, I know!" -<>- >Marriage Definitions BACHELOR: A nice guy who has cheated some nice girl out of her alimony. BRIDE: A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her. COMPROMISE: An amiable arrangement between husband and wife whereby they agree to let her have her own way. DIPLOMAT: A man who can convince his wife she would look fat in a fur coat. GENTLEMAN: A husband who steadies the stepladder so that his wife will not fall while she paints the ceiling. HOUSEWORK: What the wife does that nobody notices until she doesn't do it. HUSBAND: A man who gives up privileges he never realized he had. JOINT CHECKING ACCOUNT: A handy little device which permits the wife to beat the husband to the draw. LOVE: An obsessive delusion that is cured by marriage. MOTHER-IN-LAW: A woman who destroys her son-in-law's peace of mind by giving him a piece of hers. MRS.: A job title involving heavy duties, light earnings, and no recognition. SPOUSE: Someone who will stand by you through all the trouble you wouldn't have had if you'd stayed single in the first place. WIFE: A mate who is forever complaining about not having anything to wear at the very same time that she complains about not having enough room in the closet. -<>- Caller: 'Hi, can you connect me with Jack?' Operator: 'I'm sorry, sir, I don't understand who you are talking about.' Caller: 'On page 1, section 5, of your user guide it clearly states that I need to unplug the fax machine from the AC wall socket and telephone Jack before cleaning. Now, can you give me the number for Jack?' Operator: 'I think it means the telephone plug on the wall.' -<>- : ;; / | / | .' : .-' ' _.-' / .-*" / _ .-' .' _.-*?' .' .' .-" .' __ .' , .-' .-+. .' _.-*".' / \ .-' _.--**""**-. .-' _.y-:-" .' : `+. .*""*. `. :-. -. \ .' ; .--*""*--. / __ ` _.--. \ |$| -.` -.;/ _.-+. : .' :*" "*..*" y`-' $| ;*" _( \ / +----/ / .'.-'---+ .-._.+' `. -'_.--. :- "_( `*-: | \/\/\/ | /) ` .'___ ' "_( ; `._| | \ )` .'.' `./_" ( : \| SIGNS | (`._..--**" : .- ; `"' \ | | `----**"T"" " `+. | `. | OF THE | ' .' : _.-*"*- | | / / ' .-*" _ | TIMES | __..-'\ / bug "+,'___..--| |--**"" `-.__.' "" +----------------+ >Signs of the times SIGN IN A SHOE REPAIR STORE: "We will heel you We will save your sole We will even dye for you." Sign over a Gynecologist's Office: "Dr. Jones, at your cervix." In a Podiatrist's office: "Time wounds all heels." On a Septic Tank Truck: "Yesterday's Meals on Wheels" At an Optometrist's Office: "If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place." On a Plumber's truck: "We repair what your husband fixed." On another Plumber's truck: "Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber." At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee: "Invite us to your next blowout." On an Electrician's truck: "Let us remove your shorts." On a Maternity Room door: "Push. Push. Push." In a Veterinarian's waiting room: "Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!" In a Restaurant window: "Don't stand there and be hungry; come on in and get fed up." In the front yard of a Funeral Home: "Drive carefully. We'll wait." In a Chicago Radiator Shop: "Best place in town to take a leak." ========================================================= >-->From TheMouth: _...._ .'.o' o.'. /o o .o' o'\ |'.o 'o. o'.o| |o. o' o 'o .| \ o .o.'o'./ '._o__o_.' \ / || || || || || jgs || \/ >Top Ten Caddy Comments Golfer: "Think I'm going to drown myself in the lake." Caddy: "Think you can keep your head down that long?" Golfer: "I'd move heaven and earth to break 100 on this course." Caddy: "Try heaven, you've already moved most of the earth." Golfer: "Do you think my game is improving?" Caddy: "Yes sir, you miss the ball much closer now." Golfer: "Do you think I can get there with a 5 iron?" Caddy: "Eventually." Golfer: "You've got to be the worst caddy in the world." Caddy: "I don't think so sir. That would be too much of a coincidence." Golfer: "Please stop checking your watch all the time. It's too much of a distraction." Caddy: "It's not a watch - it's a compass." Golfer: "How do you like my game?" Caddy: "Very good sir, but personally, I prefer golf." Golfer: "Do you think it's a sin to play on Sunday?" Caddy: "The way you play, sir, it's a sin on any day." Golfer: "This is the worst course I've ever played on." Caddy: "This isn't the golf course. We left that an hour ago." Golfer: "That can't be my ball, it's too old." Caddy: "It's been a long time since we teed off, sir." -<>- .-=-. ////"\\ .=. ( 6 6 ) //"\\ \ - / (/6 6\) _.) (._ )\ = /(-` `:` `\ _(_ ) ( _)-| : |\ \ (_/ `\_/` \ | : |/ / / (_ @ _) \\_ : _/ / \ \)___(/ / |===|_) \/`"""`\/ | L | | | | | | | | | | | |_____| | | | ||| | | | ||| | | | ||| |_|_| jgs / Y \ / T \ `"`"` `"`"` >What NOT To Say To Your Date * I really don't like this restaurant that much, but I wanted to use this 2-for-1 coupon before it expired. * I refuse to get cable. That's how they keep tabs on you. * I used to come here all the time with my ex. * I never said you NEED a nose job. I just said it wouldn't hurt to consider it. * Could you excuse me? My cat gets lonely if he doesn't hear my voice on the answering machine every hour. * I really feel that I've grown in the past few years. Used to be I wouldn't have given someone like you a second look. * And I won that trophy in the inter-fraternity belching contest. * I know you said you don't eat anything with a face. But a good butcher will cut that part off for you if you ask. * It's been tough, but I've come to accept that most people I date just won't be as smart as I am. -<>- __. /-7 k .-' o.-'/ / .; \ ( [ ) \ [.---. ;/ \ ) \ (/ ) | AsH / \ ( [_' \_~ >The Top Signs You're Out of Shape 1. You've ever torn something just trying to turn off the alarm clock. 2. People at work only refer to you by saying, "Hey fatso!" 3. You've thrown your back out by carrying a bag of groceries. 4. Random strangers come up, poke you in the stomach and expect you to giggle. 5. Your record is 34 Pushups and you could have done more if the Ice Cream Man would have taken plastic. 6. You get the Christmas gift of Jigglin' To The Oldies. 7. You cramp up while watching the New York City Marathon. 8. Watching Rocky 5 is your idea of a workout video. ========================================================= >-->FUN Places To Net Visit :) Shilin Stone Forest!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/stoneforest.html Recycling Ideas 3!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/recycling3.html Rainbow Art!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/rainbowart.html Junkyard Art!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/junkart.html Tree Trunk Art!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/trunkart.html 3D Liquid Floors!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/3dfloors.html High Tech Toys 2!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/techtoys2.html Playing With Food!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/food.html Mountain Folk Art!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/folkart.html Amazing Stairways!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/stairs.html Junk Car Parts Art!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/junkcarart.html Redneck Innovations!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/redneckinnovations.html Fairy Garden Pot Art!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/potart.html Awesome Tree Houses!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/treehouses.html Thoughts Into Action 8!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/action8.html God's Ice Creations!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/gice.html Animals First Snow!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/animalsfirstsnow.html Snow Fun!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/snowfun.html Polar Bear!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/polar.html Ice Bubbles!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/bubbles.html Frost Flowers!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/frostflowers.html Albino White Moose!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/albinomoose.html -<>- >Please Visit/Follow Me On StumbleUpon: https://tinyurl.com/ydhk2o74 Some of Shangrala's Best Pages http://www.amazfamily.com/index.html -<>- ROAD FOOD Taking a road trip? Wouldn't you like to know the unique kinds of foods that line the highway? Well, Roadfood.com is the only cool web site devoted exclusively to finding the most memorable local eateries along the highways and back roads of America. http://www.roadfood.com Livermore's Centennial Light Bulb This site celebrates the longest working light bulb in history, now in its 108th year. Learn about the bulb's history, facts about the bulb and all of the media attention it has accumulated. http://www.centennialbulb.org/ REFLEX GAME Test your response time with this reflex game. Click start to change the background color and click "stop" as soon as it changes. http://www.reflexgame.com/ 4 Movie Props You Never Noticed Popped Up Everywhere In fact, people don't often realize how often old movie props get recycled. So here's a list of some inanimate objects with IMDb pages longer than those of most actors. https://tinyurl.com/ybpddmdm U2's 'The Joshua Tree': 10 Things You Didn't Know How a Georgian mansion, a roadie's death, an "Infinite Guitar" and more played into the band's career-defining 1987 album https://tinyurl.com/y7glpoag Meet Pickles The Surfing Pig! Meet the pig who can surf waves! https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=142&v=CmA3s5zgpx8 A Woman Found This Furball Crying In Her Backyard https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QTZJNnGYrCM -<>- >From Our Friend LouiseAu :) She sent us ones we have here... Mug Shots! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/mugshots.html IRONIC, Isn't It? http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/irony.html --- ...Always good for smiles! Thanks LouiseAu! Amazing Grace is one of my favorite songs and this version by Rhema Marvanne was a joy to listen to. Rhema is a Gospel singer and was 7 years old at the time of this music video being created. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DDDlxmsciqY --- ...Awesome! Thanks LouiseAu! ======================================================= >-->Quotes & Thunkers: "A nightclub in Miami has lost its business license after a woman brought a horse onto the dance floor. In the nightclub's defense, the horse's ID looked real." -Conan O'Brien "Every appliance with a clock should have a Daylight Savings button to push. You'd only use it twice a year, but that's more than I use the 'Potato' button on my microwave." -Jimmy Kimmel "It's Daylight Savings Time. Why does it have to happen on the weekend? Why can't they do it on a Wednesday at 4:00? 'Hey look, now it's 5:00. Time to go home!'"-Stephen Colbert "A town in Israel is building an amusement park that some are calling 'the Jewish Disneyland.' The Jewish Disneyland still has Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, except Doc is the chief of cardiology at Cedars-Sinai." -Conan O'Brien "Researchers just unveiled a robot that can play Scrabble. It's pretty realistic. It even gets bored halfway through and stops playing." -Jimmy Fallon "A recent study suggests that it is harder to concentrate in the winter. Said researchers, 'For example, this study was supposed to be about traffic accidents.'" -Seth Meyers "Climate change could eventually wipe out crops like strawberries and grapes. Even worse, that means edible arrangements will soon be 100 percent cantaloupe." -Jimmy Fallon "In honor of International Women's Day, McDonald's is flipping its golden arches to resemble a W instead of an M. And we can't even show you what they did over at Hooters." -Seth Meyers "Apple's new futuristic headquarters, Apple Park in Cupertino, California, is having some problems. The building is filled with so much clear glass that employees have reportedly been walking into glass walls. I guess Apple shouldn't have installed windows." -James Corden "Throw your heart over the fence and the rest will follow." --Norman Vincent Peale "Beware of the young doctor and the old barber." --Benjamin Franklin "The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don't." --Douglas Adams >Updated FUN STUFF URLS - Oh Yeah :) Shangy! ------------------------------------------------------------------------ http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/urls.html FUN URLS ------------------------------------------------------------------------ -->FULL LENGTH - FREE On line AUDIO MP3 Christian Foundational Class http://www.truthortradition.com/modules.php?name=News&file=article&sid=61 NEW LIFE IN CHRIST! ------------------------------------------------------------------------ -->This is for all you who love food and DARE to make it at home Yep. You guessed it - Recipes. These are Tried and True, Yummy to the Tummy, good old fashioned home cooking recipes that are EASY to do :) Visit Shangy's Easy-Does-It Home Recipes: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/easy.html Home Recipes >Got A good Recipe? SHARE IT HERE: Share A Recipe ************************************************************************ >TO SUBSCRIBE:Visit Here This Weeks regular Shangy emails OR For the Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com ************************************************************************