Happy President's Day! ... :) Shangy! >Here are the details on our Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com To UnSubscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com Group home page: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ShangyFunList Through no fault of my own we suddenly became an adult club in the love and romance directory so you will have to confirm that you are an adult when you go here. I still have no idea how to change this back as it sends me around in a circle when I try! or Web Site: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/ShangyFunList.html Group email address: ShangyFunList@yahoogroups.com or email me here: bcrsystems@earthlink.net ================ >-->In The 'Shangy' News :) Sue Hussein owner of the Mountain Meadow RV Park was kind enough to send us a correction and update for one of our pages. I got it done and you can view it here... _ (\\ _ ___ .-"`"(\\ _.""` `"-. / ` `-._ _.-" `\__ 6 6) `-.__.-' `", / `;-` / , | () / /` | `---`"~``\ | \ | \ \ / / /`, , | | / / "-.| | | /' / / | /,__ | /`\ jgs / /' | / `"'\ ( \ __/ /' | | `\ \ \ \ / | | `\ \ \ `-,/ / | / |-"` `"""^^^ `^^""""` Albino Bears http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/albinobear.html --- ...Thanks Again Sue! -<>- >2 Hot Off The 'Shangy' Press :) This first Hot page is from our friend RichardF. One of those truly awesome ones! Check it out here... ============|===============|===-- ejm ~~~~~|xx|~~~~~~~~~~~~~|x|~~~ ~~ ~ ~ The Moses Bridge! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/mosesbridge.html --- ...Wow! Amazing! Thank You RichardF! This next smokin' hottie comes from our friends Linda and PatDeE. It is an adorably cute one! Check it out here... _ .--'-/] O---\ '. \__ : .' :_ ..'._.-----'/ ( '. .'''.: ____'_ '' \ :: [ U ]'. \.' : _/ \__''' __\ (_)Honey | '---' '. '.____.' : : .''. : ''..: :.' : : : .' .'. : snd '..'.....: Kisses Sweeter Than Honey! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/kisses.html --- ...awww, so sweet! Thanks Linda and PatDeE! -<>- >-->From Our Friends at www.TruthOrTradition.com :) , , /////| ///// | ///// | |~~~| | | |===| |/| | B |/| | | I | | | | B | | | | L | / | E | / |===|/ jgs '---' >Mark February 22 at 8 pm ET We are now producing live video teachings that we hope will be a blessing to you! We want to start with 1 or 2 live teachings a month and see where it goes from there. You will be able to interact with John during the teaching via the live type chat feature. We will have a time for questions at the end of the teaching. We think you will enjoy this digital fellowship / interactive teaching! Stay tuned for more info! Whether you have a desktop or laptop, you can join us live from anywhere with an internet connection. View our live teachings on your iPhone or iPad with the free Live Stream app available in the Apple app store. Download Now! http://tinyurl.com/6optnd4 Have John Schoenheit teach your fellowship by tuning in Wednesday night with your whole group. Spirit & Truth Fellowship International | 180 Robert Curry Drive | Martinsville, Indiana 46151 ========================================================== >-->From TheFunnyBone: _____ Peace At Last .-' | '-. .' | '. / | \ A wise old gentleman retired and purchased ; | ; a modest home near a junior high school. He | | | spent the first few weeks of his retirement ; /|\ ; in peace and contentment. \ /` | `\ / './` | `\.' Then a new school year began. The very next '-.__|__.-' afternoon three young boys, full of youthful, after-school enthusiasm, came down his street, beating merrily on every trash can they encountered. The crashing percussion continued day after day, until finally the wise old man decided it was time to take some action. The next afternoon, he walked out to meet the young percussionists as they banged their way down the street. Stopping them, he said, "You kids are a lot of fun. I like to see you express your exuberance like that. Used to do the same thing when I was your age. Will you do me a favor? I'll give you each a dollar if you'll promise to come around every day and do your thing." The kids were elated and continued to do a bang-up job on the trash cans. After a few days, the old-timer greeted the kids again, but this time he had a sad smile on his face. "This recession's really putting a big dent in my income," he told them. "From now on, I'll only be able to pay you 50 cents to beat on the cans." The noisemakers were obviously displeased, but they did accept his offer and continued their afternoon ruckus. .---. A few days later, the wily retiree approached |#__| them again as they drummed their way down the =;===;= street. "Look," he said, "I haven't received / - - \ my Social Security check yet, so I'm not going ( _'.'_ ) to be able to give you more than 25 cents. .-`-'^'-`-. Will that be okay?" | `>o<' | / : \ "A lousy quarter?" the drum leader exclaimed. / /\ : /\ \ "If you think we're going to waste our time, .-'-/ / .-. \ \-'-. beating these cans around for a quarter, |_/ /-' '-\ \_| you're nuts! No way, mister. We quit!" /| | |\ (_| /^\ |_) And the old man enjoyed peace and serenity for | | | | the rest of his days. jgs | | | | '==='= ='===' =========================================================== *--------- Even More Bizarre February Holidays ---------* February 21 is Card Reading Day February 22 is Be Humble Day February 23 is International Dog Biscuit Appreciation Day February 24 is National Tortilla Chip Day February 25 is Pistol Patent Day (Samuel Colt) February 26 is National Pistachio Day February 27 is International Polar Bear Day February 28 is Public Sleeping Day February 29 is National Surf and Turf Day =========================================================== >-->From Our Friend PatDeE :) I particularly liked congress exempting themselves...as usual, from the laws they pass. .----. ===(_)== THIS WONT HURT A BIT... // 6 6 \\ / ( 7 ) \ '--' / \_ ._/ __) (__ /"`/`\`V/`\`\ / \ `Y _/_ \ / [DR]\_ |/ / /\ | ( \/ / / / \ \ \ / \ `-/` _.` jgs `=. `=./ `"` >Trump Explains Obamacare Let me get this straight . . . ... We're going to be "gifted" with a health care plan we are forced to purchase and fined if we don't, Which purportedly covers at least ten million more people, without adding a single new doctor, but provides for 16,000 new IRS agents, written by a committee whose chairman says he doesn't understand it, passed by a Congress that didn't read it but exempted themselves from it, and signed by a President who smokes, with funding administered by a treasury chief who didn't pay his taxes, for which we'll be taxed for four years before any benefits take effect, by a government which has already bankrupted Social Security and Medicare, all to be overseen by a surgeon general who is obese, and financed by a country that's broke!!!!! Hey - 'What the heck could possibly go wrong?' --- ...TeeHee! Thanks PatDeE! -<>- I wasn't sure that these funny statements were ambiguous. My dictionary defines it as a. Uncertainty b. capable of being understood in two or more possible senses or ways. Ergo, I guess that most of them qualify. My own creation of a double ambiguous statement is.."tend to indicate" - Pat ............. .... .... .. .. .. .. . ___ ___ . . / , \ / , \ . . \___/ \___/ . .. . .. . .. O . . | | . . \ / . . \ / . .. \______________/ .. .. \_____\ \ \/ .. .... | \ |.... ...... | | | Derek S. Tan \___/ >The Philosophy of Ambiguity FOR THOSE WHO LOVE THE PHILOSOPHY OF AMBIGUITY, AS WELL AS THE IDIOSYNCRASIES OF ENGLISH: 1. DON'T SWEAT THE PETTY THINGS AND DON'T PET THE SWEATY THINGS. 2. ONE TEQUILA, TWO TEQUILA, THREE TEQUILA, FLOOR. 3. ATHEISM IS A NON-PROPHET ORGANIZATION. 4. IF MAN EVOLVED FROM MONKEYS AND APES, WHY DO WE STILL HAVE MONKEYS AND APES? 5. THE MAIN REASON THAT SANTA IS SO JOLLY IS BECAUSE HE KNOWS WHERE ALL THE BAD GIRLS LIVE. 6. I WENT TO A BOOKSTORE AND ASKED THE SALESWOMAN, "WHERE'S THE SELF-HELP SECTION?" SHE SAID IF SHE TOLD ME, IT WOULD DEFEAT THE PURPOSE. 7. WHAT IF THERE WERE NO HYPOTHETICAL QUESTIONS? 8. IF A DEAF CHILD SIGNS SWEAR WORDS, DOES HIS MOTHER WASH HIS HANDS WITH SOAP? 9. IF SOMEONE WITH MULTIPLE PERSONALITIES THREATENS TO KILL HIMSELF, IS IT CONSIDERED A HOSTAGE SITUATION? 10. IS THERE ANOTHER WORD FOR SYNONYM? 11. WHERE DO FOREST RANGERS GO TO "GET AWAY FROM IT ALL?" 12. WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN YOU SEE AN ENDANGERED ANIMAL EATING AN ENDANGERED PLANT? 13. IF A PARSLEY FARMER IS SUED, CAN THEY GARNISH HIS WAGES? 14. WOULD A FLY WITHOUT WINGS BE CALLED A WALK? 15. WHY DO THEY LOCK GAS STATION BATHROOMS? ARE THEY AFRAID SOMEONE WILL CLEAN THEM? 16. IF A TURTLE DOESN'T HAVE A SHELL, IS HE HOMELESS OR NAKED? 17. CAN VEGETARIANS EAT ANIMAL CRACKERS? 18. IF THE POLICE ARREST A MIME, DO THEY TELL HIM HE HAS THE RIGHT TO REMAIN SILENT? 19. WHY DO THEY PUT BRAILLE ON THE DRIVE-THROUGH BANK MACHINES? 20. HOW DO THEY GET DEER TO CROSS THE ROAD ONLY AT THOSE YELLOW ROAD SIGNS? 21. WHAT WAS THE BEST THING BEFORE SLICED BREAD? 22. ONE NICE THING ABOUT EGOTISTS: THEY DON'T TALK ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE. 23. DOES THE LITTLE MERMAID WEAR AN ALGEBRA? 24. DO INFANTS ENJOY INFANCY AS MUCH AS ADULTS ENJOY ADULTERY? 25. HOW IS IT POSSIBLE TO HAVE A CIVIL WAR? 26. IF ONE SYNCHRONIZED SWIMMER DROWNS, DO THE REST DROWN TOO? 27. IF YOU ATE BOTH PASTA AND ANTIPASTO, WOULD YOU STILL BE HUNGRY? 28. IF YOU TRY TO FAIL, AND SUCCEED, WHICH HAVE YOU DONE? 29. WHOSE CRUEL IDEA WAS IT FOR THE WORD 'LISP' TO HAVE 'S' IN IT? 30. WHY ARE HEMORRHOIDS CALLED "HEMORRHOIDS" INSTEAD OF "ASSTEROIDS"? 31. WHY IS IT CALLED TOURIST SEASON IF WE CAN'T SHOOT AT THEM? 32. WHY IS THERE AN EXPIRATION DATE ON SOUR CREAM? 33. IF YOU SPIN AN ORIENTAL PERSON IN A CIRCLE THREE TIMES, DO THEY BECOME DISORIENTED? 34. CAN AN ATHEIST GET INSURANCE AGAINST ACTS OF GOD? --- ...LOL! Thanks PatDeE! -<>- .-. / / /. / ) /c\/ ( /'\/ ) / / ( / / ) / / ( /. / .`.'.Pru `'`` >Only In America! This took place in Charlotte, North Carolina. A lawyer purchased a box of very rare and expensive cigars, then insured them against, among other things, fire. Within a month, having smoked his entire stockpile of these great cigars, the lawyer filed a claim against the insurance company. In his claim, the lawyer stated the cigars were lost 'in a series of small fires.' The insurance company refused to pay, citing the obvious reason, that the man had consumed the cigars in the normal fashion. The lawyer sued - and WON! Delivering the ruling, the judge agreed with the insurance company that the claim was frivolous. The judge stated nevertheless, that the lawyer held a policy from the company, in which it had warranted that the cigars were insurable and also guaranteed that it would insure them against fire, without defining what is considered to be unacceptable 'fire' and was obligated to pay the claim. Rather than endure lengthy and costly appeal process, the insurance company accepted the ruling and paid $15,000 to the lawyer for his loss of the cigars that perished in the 'fires'. After the lawyer cashed the check, the insurance company had him arrested on 24 counts of ARSON!!! With his own insurance claim and testimony from the previous case being used against him, the lawyer was convicted of intentionally burning his insured property and was sentenced to 24 months in jail and a $24,000 fine. This true story won First Place in last year's Criminal Lawyers Award contest. ONLY IN AMERICA --- ...LMAO! A lovely Touche' - Thanks PatDeE! -<>- >Story time... =====[Shotgun] ,______________________________________ |_________________,----------._ [____] ""-,__ __....-----===== (_(||||||||||||)___________/ "" | `----------' Krogg98[ ))"-, | "" `, _,--....___ | `/ """" It's not true but who cares - it's a really great story! ------------------------ At the 1994 annual awards dinner given for Forensic Science, (AAFS) President Dr. Don Harper Mills astounded his audience with the legal complications of a bizarre death. Here is the story: On March 23, 1994...... the medical examiner viewed the body of Ronald Opus, and concluded that he died from a shotgun wound to the head. Mr. Opus had jumped from the top of a ten-story building intending to commit suicide.. He left a note to the effect indicating his despondency. As he fell past the ninth floor, his life was interrupted by a shotgun blast passing through a window, which killed him instantly. Neither the shooter nor the deceased was aware that a safety net had been installed just below the eighth floor level to protect some building workers and that Ronald Opus would not have been able to complete his suicide the way he had planned. The room on the ninth floor, where the shotgun blast emanated, was occupied by an elderly man and his wife. They were arguing vigorously and he was threatening her with a shotgun! The man was so upset that when he pulled the trigger, he completely missed his wife, and the pellets went through the window, striking Mr. Opus. When one intends to kill subject 'A' but kills subject 'B' in the attempt, one is guilty of the murder of subject 'B.' When confronted with the murder charge, the old man and his wife were both adamant, and both said that they thought the shotgun was not loaded. The old man said it was a long-standing habit to threaten his wife with the unloaded shotgun. He had no intention to murder her. Therefore the killing of Mr. Opus appeared to be an accident; that is, assuming the gun had been accidentally loaded. The continuing investigation turned up a witness who saw the old couple's son loading the shotgun about six weeks prior to the fatal accident.. It transpired that the old lady had cut off her son's financial support and the son, knowing the propensity of his father to use the shotgun threateningly, loaded the gun with the expectation that his father would shoot his mother. Since the loader of the gun was aware of this, he was guilty of the murder even though he didn't actually pull the trigger. The case now becomes one of murder on the part of the son for the death of Ronald Opus. Now comes the exquisite twist. Further investigation revealed that the son was, in fact, Ronald Opus. He had become increasingly despondent over the failure of his attempt to engineer his mother's murder. This led him to jump off the ten-story building on March 23rd, only to be killed by a shotgun blast passing through the ninth story window. The son, Ronald Opus, had actually murdered himself. So the medical examiner closed the case as a suicide. --- ...A wonderful twist of Touche' - Thanks PatDeE! -<>- >Now here is a true story - Irena Sendler Died: May 12, 2008 (aged 98) Warsaw, Poland During WWII, Irena, got permission to work in the Warsaw ghetto, as a Plumbing/Sewer specialist. She had an ulterior motive. Irena smuggled Jewish infants out in the bottom of the tool box she carried. She also carried a burlap sack in the back of her truck, for larger kids. Irena kept a dog in the back that she trained to bark when the Nazi soldiers let her in and out of the ghetto. The soldiers, of course, wanted nothing to do with the dog and the barking covered the kids/infants noises. During her time of doing this, she managed to smuggle out and save 2500 kids/infants. Ultimately, she was caught, however, and the Nazi's broke both of her legs and arms and beat her severely. Irena kept a record of the names of all the kids she had smuggled out, in a glass jar that she buried under a tree in her back yard. After the war, she tried to locate any parents that may have survived and tried to reunite the family. Most had been gassed. Those kids she helped got placed into foster family homes or adopted. In 2007 Irena was up for the Nobel Peace Prize. She was not selected. In MEMORIAM - 65 YEARS LATER I'm doing my small part by forwarding this message. I hope you'll consider doing the same. It is now more than 65 years since the Second World War in Europe ended. This e-mail is being sent as a memorial chain, in memory of the six million Jews, 20 million Russians, 10 million Christians and 1,900 Catholic priests who were murdered, massacred, raped, burned, starved and humiliated! Now, more than ever, with Iran , and others, claiming the HOLOCAUST to be 'a myth'. It's imperative to make sure the world never forgets, because there are others who would like to do it again. This e-mail is intended to reach 40 million people worldwide! Join us and be a link in the memorial chain and help us distribute it around the world. Please send this e-mail to people you know and ask them to continue thememorial chain. Please don't just delete it. It will only take you a minute to pass this along. --- ...An amazing woman! Thank You PatDeE! What gets me is she was up for the Noble Peace Price, and didn't get it - but guess who did? http://tinyurl.com/6t3phcw I think she was just too good for it. :) ======================================================= >-->In The Worldly News: [politics] >From The TeaParty: Hey Barack - What the heck are you doing to America? http://tinyurl.com/7ewydeb -<>- >From AFA: Update: Movement on Pastor Youcef - Iranian Christian facing execution http://tinyurl.com/89v7tzm -<>- >From Godfather Politics: Obama Gestapo Arrests Group for Praying in Front of White House http://tinyurl.com/7q2futf I Support Income Inequality and So Should You http://tinyurl.com/75fakmd Obama Unemployment Figures Purposely Skewed http://tinyurl.com/7bvobx8 -<>- >From BizarreNews: Sometimes neighbors can have annoying habits, like playing music too loud, not bringing their garbage cans in...and slaughtering and eating the neighborhood cats. This little culinary curiosity happened in California, where things tend to be pretty liberal, but where eating someone else's family pet is apparently still crossing the line. The unusual dining habits of 35-year-old Jason Wilmert were discovered when neighbors said they had heard sounds of a shrieking cat. "I heard a cat cry," one neighbor said. "It was a weird cry, real loud." When he went outside to investigate, he saw Wilmert firing up a burner. "I smelled cooking. It smelled like some awful meat," he said. A deputy later told him that Wilmert had been skinning cats alive and eating them. The supervising deputy district attorney would not comment on the case, but he confirmed that, "the individual is being prosecuted for using cats as a food source." Which is apparently a crime. --- ...that guy has a couple screws loose! speaking of which... Here is a perfect Valentine's Day story. It seems an 18-year-old woman in northern Sweden has been charged with harassment after taping pictures of her ex-boyfriend's private parts on lampposts around his home. I guess that would be embarrassing enough, but the scorned teen also scrawled her 24-year-old ex-boyfriend's name and phone number on the pictures, along with an unflattering comment about the size of his sex organ. I guess there was nothing in the photos to give the poor guy's johnson any perspective. Appalled that her former lover had ended their short relationship, the 18-year-old peppered him with text messages imploring him to rethink matters. On hearing that he had met a 23-year-old woman and did not want anything more to do with her, the enraged girl re-directed her ire at her new love rival. She began hanging up pictures of the woman, her cleavage heavily exposed, with a note suggesting she was a "slut" who was only interested in the 24-year-old for sex. The 18-year-old also hurled eggs at, and affixed pictures to, her ex-lover's car. When she was eventually questioned by police, the woman confessed and said she realized that what she did was wrong. On the plus side, the man did get several promising phone calls from the posters. *-- Man gives Valentine's kidney --* NASHVILLE - A Chicago man is celebrating Valentine's Day by giving his girlfriend one of the most precious gifts he has -- his kidney. Terry Lee said his girlfriend, Trisha Beckwith, was diagnosed with the autoimmune disease Lupus after they had been dating for about four months and soon discovered her kidneys were not functioning, The (Nashville) Tennessean reported Tuesday. Lee said "the decision was easy" whey they found out his blood type was a match. "I care about her, love her, and want her to live a normal life," he said. "The way I measure love is this: If you take the person out of the equation, and don't like the way your life looks without them, you are probably in love." The couple traveled to Nashville for the Valentine's Day surgery at Vanderbilt University Medical Center. *-- Police: Suspect was hiding crack in mouth --* AMBRIDGE, Pa. - Police in Pennsylvania said a man seen with a bulging lip during a traffic stop turned out to have 23 pieces of crack cocaine in his mouth. Ambridge police said they pulled the pickup truck over at 2:38 p.m. because three men were inside but the vehicle only had shoulder belts for two, The Beaver County (Pa.) Times reported Tuesday. Police said a passenger, Frank Lee Turner, 56, of Ambridge, exited the vehicle during the traffic stop and was heard mumbling with a bulging lip when he was told to return to the truck. Officers said a piece of crack cocaine fell from Turner's mouth while he was struggling with them and he spat out 22 more individually wrapped pieces of crack cocaine when they used a Taser on him. Turner was charged with aggravated assault, resisting arrest and drug possession with intent to deliver. *-- Mickey Mouse spurs school lockdown --* CANFIELD, Ohio - Administrators at an Ohio elementary school said the facility was put on lockdown when a mysterious Mickey Mouse was spotted at the school. Superintendent Dante Zambrini said the mother who dressed as Mickey Mouse to surprise her daughter's class at C.H. Campbell Elementary School in Canfield during a Tuesday Valentine's Day party followed procedure when she signed in at the office, but she did not tell officials of her plans to change into the Disney character costume in a restroom and change back after making her party appearance, The Youngstown Vindicator reported Thursday. "It was a case of, Mickey Mouse was here, and then he was missing," Zambrini said. "Our building principal called our school resource officer and the building went into lockdown as a precaution." Zambrini said the lockdown was executed perfectly and ended when officials and police spoke to the mother and determined she had no ill intent. *-- Suspect bummed a smoke from alleged victim --* LEOMINSTER, Mass. - Police in Massachusetts said an accused purse snatcher was arrested after he bummed a cigarette from his alleged victim two days later. Leominster police said the woman, whose purse was taken at knifepoint Saturday at the Heritage Gardens apartment complex, recognized Malek Matos, 25, of Fitchburg, when he asked her for a cigarette Monday outside the Registry of Motor Vehicles, the Worcester Telegram reported Thursday. The woman told RMV employees and they called police. Matos was arrested and charged with armed robbery. He was ordered held in lieu of $5,000 bail. =========================================================== >-->From Our Friend Linda :) ____________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________ ______________________________.-"-._________________ _____________________________.-"""-.________________ _____________________________."-_-".________________ _____________________________.-" "-.________________ ______________________________.-"-._________________ ______________________________.---._________________ _____________________________.-"""-.________________ _______________________.-""-"""""""""-""-.__________ _______________________.-."".-.""".-."".-.__________ ______________________."-.".-"-.".-"-.".-"._________ ______________________.--." .-. " .-. ".--._________ _____________________.--._." """ "._.--.________ _____________________.--._.-"""""""""-._.--.________ ____________________.-".___.""""""""".__.--.________ ____________________.--.___.-"""""""-.__."-.________ _____________________.-.___.--"""""--.__.--.________ _____________________.-.____.-"""""-.___.-._________ _____________________.-"._.---"""""---._.-._________ _____________________.._._.--"""-"""--._."-.________ ______________________.__.--""""-""""--..-._________ _________________________.""""-"""-"""".-.__________ _________________________.-"""--"--"""-.____________ _________________________.-""""---""""-.____________ _________________________.-""""-.-""""-.____________ _________________________.--"""-.-"""--.____________ _________________________.--"""-.-"""--.____________ __________________________.-"""-.-"""-._____________ __________________________.-"""-.-"""-._____________ ___________________________.-""-.-""-.______________ ___________________________.--"-.-"--.______________ ____________________________.-"-.-"-._______________ ____________________________.-"-.-"-._______________ ____________________________.-"".""-._______________ ____________________________.-"-.-"-._______________ ___________________________.-""-.-""-.______________ ___________________________.-""-.-""-.______________ _____________o!O____________.-"-.-"-._______________ _____________________________.--.--.________________ _____________________________.--.--.________________ _____________________________.--.--.________________ _____________________________.-"."-.________________ _______________________________._.__________________ ____________________________________________________ >Spectacular Tricks to Teach Your Body One of the complex machine in the world is nothing but Our human body. There are lot of amazing things that are yet to be learned from the human body. Not all things are know to our body, there are few cool tricks that we can teach our body. So, let's see those cool tips... 1.) If you've got an itch in your throat, scratch your ear. When the nerves in the ear get stimulated, they create a reflex in the throat that causes a muscle spasm, which cures the itch. 2.) Having trouble hearing someone at a party or on the phone? Use your right ear it's better at picking up rapid speech. But, the left is better at picking up music tones. 3.) If you need to relieve yourself BADLY, but you're not anywhere near a bathroom, fantasize about RELATIONS. That preoccupies your brain and distracts it. 4.) Next time the doctor's going to give you an injection, COUGH as the needle is going in. The cough raises the level of pressure in your spinal canal, which limits the pain sensation as it tries to travel to your brain. --- ...just don't cough right before or you could get a bad poke! 5.) Clear a stuffed nose or relieve sinus pressure by pushing your tongue against the roof of your mouth then pressing a finger between your eyebrows. Repeat that for 20 seconds it causes the vomer bone to rock, which loosens your congestion and clears you up. 6.) If you ate a big meal and you're feeling full as you go to sleep, lay on your left side. That'll keep you from suffering from acid reflux it keeps your stomach lower than your esophagus, which will help keep stomach acid from sliding up your throat. 7.) You can stop a toothache by rubbing ice on the back of your hand, on the webbed area between your thumb and index finger. The nerve pathways there stimulate a part of the brain that blocks pain signals from your mouth. 8.) If you get all messed up on liquor, and the room starts spinning, put your hand on something stable. The reason: Alcohol dilutes the blood in the part of your ear called the cupula, which regulates balance. Putting your hand on something stable gives your brain another reference point, which will help make the world stop spinning. 9.) Stop a nose bleed by putting some cotton on your upper gums right behind the small dent below your nose and press against it hard. Most of the bleeding comes from the cartilage wall that divides the nose, so pressing there helps get it to stop. 10.) Slow your heart rate down by blowing on your thumb. The vagus nerve controls your heart rate, and you can calm it down by breathing. 11.) Need to breathe underwater for a while? Instead of taking a huge breath, HYPERVENTILATE before you go under, by taking a bunch of short breaths. That'll trick your brain into thinking it has more oxygen, and buy you about 10 extra seconds. 12.) You can prevent BRAIN FREEZE by pressing your tongue flat against the roof of your mouth, covering as much surface area as possible. Brain freeze happens because the nerves in the roof of your mouth getextremely cold, so your brain thinks your whole body is cold. It compensates by overheating which causes your head to hurt. By warming up the roof of your mouth, you'll chill your brain and feel better. 13.) If your hand falls asleep, rock your head from side to side. That will wake your hand or arm up in less than a minute. Your hand falls asleep because of the nerves in your neck compressing so loosening your neck is the cure. If your foot falls asleep, that's governed by nerves lower in the body, so you need to stand up and walk around. 14.) Finally, this one's totally USELESS, but a nice trick. Have someone stick their arm out to the side, straight, palm down. Press down on his wrist with two fingers. He'll resist, and his arm will stay horizontal. Then, have him put his foot on a surface that's half an inch off the ground, like a stack of magazines, and do the trick again. Because his spine position is thrown off, his arm will fall right to his side, no matter how much he tries to resist. 15.) Got the hiccups? Press thumb and second finger over your eyebrows until the hiccups are over - usually shortly. --- ...Interesting Info! Thanks Linda! ========================================================= >-->From Our Friend Johanna :) ___ /L|0\ / | \ / \ / | \ / \ / __ | __ \ / __/ \__ \ / /__ | __\ \ /___________________\ / | \ / _|_ \ / ____/___\____ \ ___________[o0o]___________ O O O Paul Tomblin >THANK YOU AMERICA ! TY101 Dear American Taxpayer For only the second time in my adult life, I am not ashamed of my country. I want to thank the hard working American people for paying $242 thousand dollars for my vacation in Spain . My daughter Sasha, several long-time family friends, my personal staff and various guests had a wonderful time. Honestly, you just haven't lived until you have stayed in a $2,500.00 per night private 3-story villa at a 5-Star luxury hotel. Thank you also for the use of Air Force Two and the 70 Secret Service personnel who tagged along to be sure we were safe and cared for at all times. By the way, if you happen to be visiting the Costa del Sol , I highly recommend the Buenaventura Plaza restaurant in Marbella ; great lobster with rice and oysters! I'm ashamed to admit the lobsters we ate in Martha's Vineyard were not quite as tasty, but what can you do if you're not in Europe, you have to just grin and bear it? Air Force Two (which costs $11,351 per hour to operate according to Government Accounting Office reports) only used 47,500 gallons of jet fuel for this trip and carbon emissions were a mere 1,031 tons of CO2. These are only rough estimates, but they are close. That's quite a carbon footprint as my good friend Al Gore would say, so we must ask the American citizens to drive smaller, more fuel efficient cars and drive less too, so we can lessen our combined carbon footprint. I know times are hard and millions of you are struggling to put food on the table and trying to make ends meet. So I do appreciate your sacrifices and do hope you find work soon. I was really exhausted after Barack took our family on a luxury vacation in Maine a few weeks ago. I just had to get away for a few days. Cordially, Michelle (Moochelle) Obama P.S. Thank you as well for the $2 BILLION dollar trip to India P.SS.Thank you, too, for that vacation trip to Martha's Vineyard; it was fabulous. P.SSS. Oh, I almost forgot to say thanks also for our two-week trip to Hawaii at Christmas. That 7,000 square foot house was great! That only cost you guys $4m. !!The Mr. wanted to do Camp David! Boring !!!!!!!! P.SSSs don't forget my ski trip to Vail this winter and now the girls and I are in Africa with my mom. All this while Barack golfs and campaigns to keep our trips coming for the next 4 years ! Love ya! Remember, we all have to share the pain of these economic times equally! Love to -redistribute- share- the wealth. SEND THIS TO EVERY AMERICAN NOW STAND UP, SPEAK UP. --- ...Yeah, thanks Johanna! ============================================================== >-->From CleanLaffs: ? WARNING! ! /_\ |C_,_/_____| ejm98 | ||:::::f| O+ _/\ f /| | \~\ As scientists and concerned citizens, we applaud the recent trend towards legislation which requires the prominent placing of warnings on products that present hazards to the general public. Yet we must also offer the cautionary thought that such warnings, however well-intentioned, merely scratch the surface of what is really necessary in this important area. This is especially true in light of the findings of 20th century quantum physics. We therefore propose that the following list of warnings appears on every product offered for sale in the United States. WARNING: This Product Warps Space and Time in Its Vicinity. CAUTION: The Mass of This Product Contains the Energy Equivalent of 85 Million Tons of TNT per Net Ounce of Weight. HANDLE WITH EXTREME CARE: This Product Contains Minute Electrically Charged Particles Moving at Velocities in Excess of Five Hundred Million Miles Per Hour. CONSUMER NOTICE: Because of the "Uncertainty Principle," It Is Impossible for the Consumer to Find Out at the Same Time Both Precisely Where This Product Is and How Fast It Is Moving. (Note: This one is optional on the grounds that Heisenburg was never quite sure that his principle was correct) ADVISORY: There is an Extremely Small but Nonzero Chance That, Through a Process Know as "Tunneling," This Product May Spontaneously Disappear from Its Present Location and Reappear at Any Random Place in the Universe, Including Your Neighbor's Domicile. The Manufacturer Will Not Be Responsible for Damages or Inconvenience That May Result. ATTENTION: Despite Any Other Listing of Product Contents Found Hereon, the Consumer is Advised That, in Actuality, This Product Consists Of 99.999999999% Empty Space. PLEASE NOTE: Some Quantum Physics Theories Suggest That When the Consumer Is Not Directly Observing This Product, It May Cease to Exist or Will Exist Only in a Vague and Undetermined State. HEALTH WARNING: Care Should Be Taken When Lifting This Product, Since Its Mass, and Thus Its Weight, Is Dependent on Its Velocity Relative to the User. -<>- American idioms don't travel well. Case in point, this email my boss received from a Chinese businessman... "I apologize for taking so long to get this pricing to you, but I had to get all my ducts in the road." -<>- Torrential rainstorms were knocking down power lines all over town. That meant, as a customer service rep for the electric company, I was dispatching repairmen right and left. When one lineman called a customer to get her exact address, he was told, "I'm at Post Office Box 99." The weary lineman replied, "Ma'am, I'll be coming to you in a truck, not an envelope." -<>- .----. | | MOOK! MOOK! | __ |/ . |[ 8]| ) `(.(o==o).) " " _ O'>) / f< \ // / / | | \ \\ / \ ejm/a:f A guy was hitchhiking on a very dark and stormy night. The night was getting on and no cars went by. Suddenly he saw a car roll slowly toward him and stop. Without thinking about it, the guy jumped into the back seat and closed the door when he suddenly realized there was nobody behind the wheel! Just then the car started slowly rolling forward again. He was beginning to get really freaked out when he noticed a curve in the road ahead. He was just thinking about climbing into the front seat when a hand mysteriously appeared through the window and moved the wheel. The guy, paralyzed in terror, watched how the hand appeared every time right before a curve. Gathering his courage, the guy finally jumped out of the car and ran to the nearest town. Wet and in shock, he went to a restaurant and started telling everybody about the horrible experience he just went through. About half an hour later, two guys walked into the same rest- aurant. They were looking around for a table when one said to the other, "Hey, look, isn't that the jerk who got in the car when we were pushing it?" -<>- I'm sure if the customer had taken two seconds, he probably would have come up with the answer to his question on his own. But instead he called information. "I'm looking for the number of a business," he said when I picked up his call. "What's the name of the business?" I asked. "1-800-FLOWERS." -<>- A nurse noticed a man in golf attire pacing up and down out- side the operating room where another golfer who had a golf ball driven down his throat, was being treated. "Is he a relative of yours?" the nurse, stepping outside the room, asked the pacing golfer. "No," replied the man, "That's my ball!" -<>- | | _ | _/=\_ | _/=====\_ | '-\-' / \ ' , ' /(o)| __)-(____ /|^^^| / <\/> __/_|\/^| / /| : | /__|^^^| / / | : |/___|^^^| /_/ }===={)___|^^^|\ .-. ((' |) (| )__|^^^|_\ ______/o ) \\ | | )_|^^^|/ \----- ( / _____ '\ | | | \|^^^| \ / \ // ||||| ___\| | |____|^^^|__________\ / \\\\///__||||| /___)| | |___///|\\\_____=____\_/(___\\)/___|()|| /___( |__|_|__////|\\\\ __ ___-______| | \____||||| /__=__)(___)__)^^^^^^^^^( ;__________| |______||||| /_____(___________________)___________" "____=__||||| ________________________________________________||||| ||||| _________ |OOShy When I was a child my family used to sometimes take our vacations, in British Columbia. In those days all Canadians appreciated their American neighbors. We had a favorite place to visit, mostly because of the fine fishing. It was at a Lake that was about 30 miles long and a 1/2 mile wide. While we were around our campfire in the evening the local Indians would go from camp to camp selling their wares. They would also tell of the Legends of the area. This one Legend always stuck in my mind. It seemed that on this particular Lake two Indian Tribes made their homes. They were, however, at War, with one another from years before. There was an Indian Maiden in one Camp who was in love with a young Brave in the other Camp. They used to stand, on the shore, each on their respective side of the Lake, and chant Indian love calls to each other...even though they were warned by their Chiefs that nothing could ever come of it. One day they just could not stand being apart any longer. That evening, on a cold Fall night, they each jumped into the Lake and swam towards each other in the Moonlight. When they reached each other in the center of the Lake, they embraced and, very quickly, froze to death. This act so im- pressed the Brave's Tribe that they named the Lake after the young man. I will never forget those wonderful vacations that we spent at "Lake Stupid". ========================================================= ,-`"-=') =/////// ,== _,_(((((-`6\ ==.| /,,...\\\C _| .--. ((((\\\\\` _, /;_| )9 )))))./ `. / } _\,_ ,-'))) \ / /=-. ,-./ \/ '))) . /\_/ / \ (,-.%\ / /-' ') \/\ / ( \ (/ \ ' /( ' `-/ \( \ ,- / ( `-' \ . / / \ \ &_) /\ \ | ( /--.- \ \----,------=;% | _/ _); `. ` `-. .`\ ) +++/ \ ,," %&-. ; \\| `-` `-=.;_,.__.__\_,/ )_/___+_/_________\,"(_//_(__)______:-._) gpyy >-->ACTUAL EXCERPTS FROM STUDENT SCIENCE EXAM PAPERS: Charles Darwin was a naturalist who wrote the organ of the species. Benjamin Franklin produced electricity by rubbing cats backwards. The theory of evolution was greatly objected to because it made man think. Three kinds of blood vessels are arteries, vanes and caterpillers. The process of turning steam back into water again is called conversation. The Earth makes one resolution every 24 hours. To collect fumes of sulfur, hold a deacon over a flame in a test tube. Algebraical symbols are used when you do not know what you are talking about. The pistol of a flower is its only protection against insects. Dew is formed on leaves when the sun shines down on them and makes them perspire. A super-saturated solution is one that holds more than it can hold. A triangle which has an angle of 135 degrees is called an obscene triangle. When you haven't got enough iodine in your blood you get a glacier. For fractures: to see if the limb is broken, wiggle it gently back and forth. To remove dust from the eye, pull the eye down over the nose. For asphyxiation: apply artificial respiration until the patient is dead. When you smell an odorless gas, it is probably carbon monoxide. ========================================================= >-->From JokeCentral: , `.-- .,-"" . ._,' . _,. `. , / .'.oo`.. `. `- .__.-' :: .; "-()-"`. \.-. / doida ; /'". ,"`'. "-- "-" .': : `----' "-" ' >GROANERS: "Oh, I sure am happy to see you," the little boy said to his grandmother on his dad's side. "Now maybe mother will do the trick she has been promising us." The grandmother was curious. "What trick is that?" she asked. "I heard her tell daddy," the little boy answered, "that she would climb the walls if you came to visit." (Kevin Rayner) "Alpha sector, this is Tango sector. How you doing out there, Alpha?" "Tango, Alpha. Its cold, I'm hungry, and I'm sick of this whole thing.When will there be peace in South Africa?" "It takes Tutu, Tango." (Jason Dias) Marcel Marceau owned a fabulous restaurant on the coast of Maine that specialized in the local seafood. Theirparticular speciality was their superb version of "Filet of Sole". Customers came from to enjoy the fine food and be greeted by the owner in pantomime. The kitchen staff were also masters of the art of pantomime. A sign over the kitchen entrance read, "These are the mimes that fry Maine's soles." (Ken Pinkham) A beautiful blonde woman and her husband were at home one night. The husband notices his wife standing in front of the fridge with the freezer section open. She is standing there with a dead pan look on her face STARING into the freezer. Her husband watches her awhile she continues standing not moving not blinking just staring into the freezer compartment! Finally after 10 minutes of witnessing her staring and staring straight into the freezer he can take no more. He says to his beautiful blonde wife "Honey, What in the hell are you doing?" She says, "making orange juice". "Making orange juice", he asks her, baffled. "Yes", she says, "It says, 'concentrate'." (William Brabant) This woman was talking to her friend when she got back from her recent trip to Spokane, Washington. Her friend asked her how she liked Spokane. She answered, "I don't know, I never got there." So the friend says, "You never got there...what do you mean?" She answers, "You know me, I have to stop at every rest area and they all say 'clean bathrooms', well, it takes longer that you think!" (Doug Helsel) I went to this bar in San Francisco. There was a small stage where a girl was dancing. Since there was no other customer there, the bartender was in a talkative mood. He told me he employed twin girls named Shelly and Jan to dance on the stage. Since they were working their way through college, they took turns dancing. One day Shelly danced there and the next day Jan danced there. I asked him which one was on the stage that day and he replied, "It must be Shelly 'cause Jan don't shake like that." (Jack Darcy) Penny dropped in on her neighbor and found her sitting at the kitchen table, staring blankly at a half-empty cup of coffee; her three kids squabbling loudly in the other room. "What's wrong?" she asked. The neighbor told her that she had "morning sickness." Surprised, the neighbor said, "I didn't even know you were pregnant again!" "I'm not," the harried young woman replied, "I'm just sick of mornings." (William Brabant) My grandson, Chris, has worn glasses since the age of three. When he was in the first grade he came home one day very distressed. Wanting to find out what was the matter, his mother asked, "Chris, what happened today to upset you so much?" He answered, "It's not fair -- I'm not allowed to go to the library." His mother became very concerned and asked, "Why aren't you allowed to go to the library?" With a tearful reply he said, "Because, in order to go to the library you have to have supervision, and I wear glasses!" (William Brabant) Jimmy was sent to prison for his crimes but he told the warden he wasn't worried at all about serving his full term. The warden asked him why, since most prisoners immediately start planning how they can get out early. Jimmy replied, "Well, my wife has never let me finish a sentence the whole time I've been married!" (Tim Davis) I have high blood pressure. And I hate talking about it. And I hate, most of all, going to the doctors' office. My doctor required that I come to see him twice monthly for blood pressure monitoring and, of course, I tried to get out of it. "I really don't want to come here that often," I said. He replied, "Get used to dis appointment." (Jason Dias) "Give me a sentence about a public servant," said the teacher. Little Johnny answered: "The fireman came down the ladder pregnant." The teacher took the lad aside to correct him. "Don't you know what pregnant means?" she asked. "Sure," said Johnny confidently. - "It means carrying a child." There was a man in Florida who raised "see cows" or manatees. He soon had so many of them that he stopped giving them names and just assigned them letters of the alphabet. A, B, C, etc. He let them all swim free in the lagoon beside his house. Except for "U", which he kept in a special pen. I guess he was afraid of losing his "U" manatee. (William Brabant) -<>- ___ ,-'" "`-. ,'_ `. / / \ ,- \ __ | \_0 --- | JOKE - Get It? / | | | \ \ `--.______,-/ | ___) \ ,--"" ,/ | / _ \ \-_____,- / \__-/ \ | `. ,' \___/ < ´--------' \__/\ | Wny \__// >Blondes - this is a J-O-K-E; therefore, do not read! - J.R. *********************************************************** New viruses out there..... Be on the lookout for the following viruses CLINTON VIRUS Gives you a 7 inch Hard Drive with NO memory VIAGRA VIRUS Makes a new hard drive out of an old floppy LEWINSKY VIRUS Sucks all the memory out of your computer, then e-mails everyone about what it did RONALD REAGAN VIRUS Saves your data but forgets where it is stored MIKE TYSON VIRUS Quits after two bytes OPRA WINFREY VIRUS Your 300MB hard drive suddenly shrinks to 100MB, then slowly expands to 200MB DR. JACK KEVORKIAN VIRUS Deletes all old files ELLEN DEGENERES VIRUS Disks can no longer be inserted TITANIC VIRUS(A strain of Lewinsky virus) Your whole computer goes down DISNEY VIRUS Everything in your computer goes Goofy PROZAC VIRUS Screws up your RAM but your processor doesn't care JOEY BUTTAFUOCO VIRUS Only attacks minor files LORENA BOBBIT VIRUS Reformats your hard drive into a 3.5 inch floppy, then discards it - through Windows OBAMA VIRUS Redistributes your hard drive so large files are allocated less disk space and gives smaller files more allocated space confusing the FAT system so the hard drive cannot boot up. -<>- >It's PUNny TOM SWIFTIES .-----. ()() / \ .'() |__...__|/ |_....._| .-' ___ '-. \_.-`. .`-._/ __ .--. _ (|\ (_) /|) .-;.-"-.-;`_;-, ( \_=_/ ) .(_( `)-;___),-;_), _(_ _)_ (.( `\.-._)-.( ). ) /` ||'-'|| `\ ,(_`'--;.__\ _).;--'`_) _ /_/ (_>o<_) \_\ // )`--..__ ``` _( o )'(';,)\_//| || : || |\\ \;' ````` `\\ '.\\--' |`"""""""`|// / ':.___// \___,___/\_( | '---'| |__|__| ; ; ;""|""; \ / [] | [] '. .' .' / \ '. jgs'-,.__ __.,-' `--' `--' (___/`````````\___) "That leprechaun is not telling the truth," Tom implied.. (Simon Champion) "I'm going to expand my formal garden," Tom said morosely. (E. J. Carter) "I need to be careful not to add too much water," Tom said with great concentration.. (Simon Champion) "I'm getting a television job holding cue cards," Tom answered promptly. (Lawless) "I just married a lioness - look at my wedding ring!" roared Leo, with wild abandon.. (Simon Champion) "The bar was out of drinks," said Tom dispiritedly. (Davie Crocket) "I'll cast myself in plaster," Tom said, hoping to make a good impression.(M I E) "I hate grape beverages," Tom whined with clarity. (Simon Champion) "Let's stay ahead of the other boat," the captain said sternly. (Paul Dickson) "I upholstered this chair using only Velcro," Tom said tactlessly. (Stan Kegel) "You gave me two less than a dozen," he said tensely. (Paul Dickson) "I love hot dogs," said Tom with relish.. (Simon Champion) "I let her in without a ticket," Tom admitted. (Stan Kegel) OTHERS Did you hear about the guy who wouldn't go to an Eagle's concert becausehe was afraid of heights! (Dunjan Seraf) Did you hear about the guy who wouldn't go see Hole because he was claustrophobic. (Jason Dias) Did you hear about the guy who wouldn't go see the Moody blues because he got enough of those from his teenagers at home. (Jason Dias) A site selling 80 kinds of cookies and a beverage to go with: 80 & TEA (Cynthia MacGregor) Warning on a bottle of drain cleaner: "If you do not understand, or cannot read, all directions, cautions and warnings, do not use this product." (Irene A. Mystery) "Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!" "Ah, we've cornered him at last." (Paul Dickson) "Waiter, what is this fly doing in my alphabet soup?" "Learning to read?" (Paul Dickson) “Waiter, there's a hair in my soup.” “That's not soup, it's rabbit stew!” (Norman Gilbert) "Waiter, there's a twig in my soup!" "I'll inform the branch manager." (Martin Flack) "Waiter, there's a dead fly swimming in my soup!" "Nonsense, sir, dead flies can't swim." (Paul Dickson) "Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!" "If you wanted him with dessert, why didn't you say so" (Paul Dickson) "Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup?" "Dunno, sir, looks like the breaststroke." (Paul Dickson) -<>- m / \C \ _ /`--|)---- \_ O__/ \`\ `\/_\ `` /_ \\ ` \ BP -' fencers >Rules of Combat [this works for some spiritual battles too] If the enemy is in range, so are you. Incoming fire has the right of way. Don't look conspicuous, it draws fire. There is always a way. The easy way is always mined. Try to look unimportant, they may be low on ammo. Professionals are predictable, it's the amateurs that are dangerous. The enemy invariably attacks on two occasions: - When you're ready for them. - When you're not ready for them. Teamwork is essential, it gives them someone else to shoot at. If you can't remember, the claymore is pointed at you. The enemy diversion you have been ignoring will be the main attack. A "sucking chest wound" is natures way of telling you to slow down. If your attack is going well, you have walked into an ambush. Never draw fire, it irritates everyone around you. Anything you do can get you shot, including nothing. Make it tough enough for the enemy to get in and you won't be able to get out. Never share a foxhole with anyone braver than yourself. If you are short of everything but the enemy, you are in a combat zone. When you have secured an area, don't forget to tell the enemy. -<>- .+. @ /' \. .: _______ )) ( _:::.__.'_ `:::::: ~ / ,\ .::' :::::' \` \ .'::' :::' ('.\ `-.. :. __::'_______`-.\ ))::._ .'``::::::::: `-'~' `:::' a:f >What about The Queen? We were celebrating the 100th anniversary of our church. Several former pastors and the bishop were in attendance. At one point, our minister had the children gather at the altar for a talk about the importance of the day. He began by asking them, "Does anyone know what the Bishop does? There was a long silence. Finally, one little boy slowly raised his hand and answered gravely, "He's the one you can move diagonally." By way of Reader's Digest (www.rd.com) -<>- How many Russians does it take to change a light bulb? 21. One to change the bulb and 20 to shoot down the electrician -<>- .-. ## ) * _.-+*'`*+-._ ,## _ _ #. ;### ((.;;.)) ##: .=._.; ,-*:;;:*-. *##:._.=, >##; *-')_@@_(`-* ;###< ---------------`****------(o `` o)-----*****'-------------e:l `-""-' >Bigger Piece One night at the dinner table, the wife commented, "When we were first married, you took the small piece of steak and gave me the larger. Now you take the large one and leave me the smaller; You don't love me any more..." "Nonsense, darling," replied the husband, "you just cook better now." ========================================================= >-->FUN Places To Net Visit :) Boys To President http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/boystopres.html Bible: Which Parts are Written To You? http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/BibleStudy/whichparts.html Fawn Rescue http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/fawnrescue.html Lets Dance! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/dance.html Who Is WE? http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/whoiswe.html Flower Dog Art http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/flowerart2.html Awesome Photos http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/awesome.html Amazing Bike Car http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/bikecar.html Celebrities Then And Now http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/celebrities.html Look Who's Talking 5 http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/talking5.html -<>- >From Our Friend Linda :) Why there were no Fitness centers in the 50s http://tinyurl.com/ybd9oet --- ...Cool! Thanks Linda! Notice the ladies aren't wearing stupid stilts - they can move it! It's called GLASS http://www.youtube.com/watch_popup?v=6Cf7IL_eZ38&vq=medium --- ...WoW! Indeed! Thanks Linda! -<>- >From Our Friend PatDeE :) (Dang -- my tablet won't do that) http://www.20min.ch/ro/videotv/?vid=229397&cid=138 --- ...Wow - pretty neat! Yhanks PatDeE! -<>- >From Our Friend Sharon :) She sent us one we have here... Lily And Maddison http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/greatdanes.htm --- ...A heartwarming reminder! Thanks Sharon! -<>- >From Our Friend JDR :) The music is so perfect with this. Dog and Horse http://www.wimp.com/puppyhorse/ --- ...Such a cute one! Thanks JDR! -<>- >From Our Friend Brenda :) Lady Juggler http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N914iZJwMq0 --- ...Geesh! Good stuff! Thanks Brenda! -<>- >From Our Friend Bunni :) Wow this broke my heart ....we are doomed !! You'll need a hanky 4 sure The End Of Civilization http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JIgIWL-qElM --- ...So sad! And It works both ways too! Thanks Bunni! -<>- >From LynnLynn's Links: Break.Com http://www.break.com Learn to draw and more http://www.drawspace.com Maxine Humor! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/maxinehumor.html Army In Iraq http://www.youtube.com/watch?NR=1&feature=fvwp&v=3OykPqYPugs Army-Beach Boys http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VWmOaBqy8Qo Visit Melissa's Online Store You can get anything you want (except for Melissa ) at the online store http://pdhomes.net/mall/babylissa/mySTORES/ISELL4.html If You haven't joined LynnLynn's mailing List yet, send a blank e-mail to LynnLynns-links-subscribe@Yahoogroups.com ============================================================== >-->Quotes & Thunkers: "Jet Blue has apologized now for stranding thousands of passengers and today, Jet Blue's president introduced a passenger bill of rights. First on the list is 'You have the right to fly Delta and United.'" -Conan O'Brien "There's an asteroid heading toward the earth and we're all going to die. There is! Scientists are saying there's a 1 in 45,000 chance of an asteroid hitting the earth in 2036. Now an asteroid is a giant rock. It's headed toward the earth. We should send up a giant piece of paper. We couldn't send scissors; that would be impractical." -Craig Ferguson "We have a new recipe for an exotic gourmet dinner. First, take two credit cards..." --Bessie and Beulah "I'm really upset with the restaurant parking attendants. They won't validate my feelings." --Scott Wood "Our four-year-old Candice inquired, 'When our goldfish die could we take them out and eat them?'" --Bobbi Bourbonnais "I have a friend whose life is so boring, he has a bumper sticker on his car that says, 'Hit me. I need the excite- ment.'" --Bill Jones "I hate waking up every morning to my alarm. I always bang my head on the steering wheel." --Scott Wood "Some say the glass is half empty, some say the glass is half full, I say, are you going to drink that?" --Lisa Claymen >Updated FUN STUFF URLS - Oh Yeah :) Shangy! ------------------------------------------------------------------------- http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/urls.html FUN URLS ------------------------------------------------------------------------- -->BECOMING A CHRISTIAN HOW TO BE A CHRISTIAN! ------------------------------------------------------------------------- -->FULL LENGTH - FREE On line AUDIO MP3 Christian Foundational Class http://www.truthortradition.com/modules.php?name=News&file=article&sid=61 NEW LIFE IN CHRIST! ------------------------------------------------------------------------- -->This is for all you who love food andd DARE to make it at home Yep. You guessed it - Recipes. These are Tried and True, Yummy to the Tummy, good old fashioned home cooking recipes that are EASY to do :) Visit Shangy's Easy-Does-It Home Recipes: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/easy.html Home Recipes >Got A good Recipe? SHARE IT HERE: Share A Recipe ************************************************************************ >TO SUBSCRIBE: Visit Here This Weeks regular Shangy emails OR For the Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com ************************************************************************