Let It Snow ... :) Shangy! >Here are the details on our Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com To UnSubscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com Group home page: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ShangyFunList Through no fault of my own we suddenly became an adult club in the love and romance directory so you will have to confirm that you are an adult when you go here. I still have no idea how to change this back as it sends me around in a circle when I try! or Web Site: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/ShangyFunList.html Group email address: ShangyFunList@yahoogroups.com or email me here: bcrsystems@earthlink.net ================ __,_,_,___) _______ (--| | | (--/ ),_) ,_) | | | _ ,_,_ | |_ ,_ ' , _|_,_,_, _ , __| | | (/_| | (_| | | || |/_)_| | | |(_|/_)___, ( |___, ,__| \____) |__, |__, | _...._ \ _ / .::o:::::. (\o/) .:::'''':o:. --- / \ --- :o:_ _::: >*< `:}_>()<_{:' >0<@< @ `'//\\'` @ >>>@<<* @ # // \\ # @ >@>*<0<<< __#_#____/'____'\____#_#__ >*>>@<<<@<< [__________________________] >@>>0<<<*<<@< |=_- .-/\ /\ /\ /\--. =_-| >*>>0<<@<<<@<<< |-_= | \ \\ \\ \\ \ |-_=-| >@>>*<<@<>*<<0<*< |_=-=| / // // // / |_=-_| \*/ >0>>*<<@<>0><<*<@<< |=_- |`-'`-'`-'`-' |=_=-| ___\\U//___ >*>>@><0<<*>>@><*<0<< | =_-| o o |_==_| |\\ | | \\| >@>>0<*<<0>>@<<0<<<*<@< |=_- | ! ( ! |=-_=| | \\| | _(UU)_ >((*))_>0><*<0><@<<<0<*< _|-,-=| ! ). ! |-_-=|_ |\ \| || / //||.*.*.*.|>>@<<*<<@>><0<<@>>>>>| ( ~~~ )/ (((((((()))))))) ~~~~~~~~ '""""`------' `w---w` `------------' >-->Hot Off The 'Shangy' Press :) Here's an interesting one sure to bring some smiles! It comes from a forward from our friend PatDeE! Check it out here... L E T I T .--._ S / (`{_} ) *\ N / | |* '. O /_...._* \ ;' ____ '.| W _ _ / .' `'. \ _ /` `| / `\ _ (_/ e e \_) _/ ` / | ' |_ | /) | ( '. _.-' '. .' ) \ // , / .' `._) `(_.' '. /'(/"""`_.;,_.'* / \ * './ `----`\.:\\ / \ * \ :: :: :| .|| * / '. ':: :: _/:'|' / '. * `````/` |* .' | * /.:'/ | \ * ,'` /* / .'._ / .:'| _.'. .' `"|.:' \ '. / \' .:. \ ; \ .:' '-._ ; " "-. _| ':' .:' = |- "`` --. | '. .:' = | ; `-:_= ; \ / jgs '. .' `"- ... -- "` Fun With Snow In Russia! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/russia.html --- ...What an amazing and amusing one! Thanks PatDeE! |"|")/"\<""|"\ / "|"| ||_" <"|\ |/"\| ||\/||\ |\ | | /|"|" |"|"\\_/_> | | | |"||_ _>| \|\_/|/\|| ||"\| \| |"\| | """""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""" .-"""-. / \ ___,---,__ | :| (/_/|\ \|_/) | .:| || \ | .-----. \ ..::/ ||\ \| |`"""`| .-` :-. || \ | /______ |_____| .' ':. `|\ \| `\ ) .-[____=]-. /' ':\ """"" / `"-------"` / ':\ <"/"|\ |")|" . ; :; _>\_|"\|"\|" /|\ | :| | | :| | .:| ,__ | ||\"|" | .::| |\ |"||"\| : .:::: \ |")/"\|"\\ / \ ..::::/ |")\_/|_/ | _,-`-.___ ..::::::-'-,_ ^ -" "~- /"|\ |")|")/"\"|" __ \_|"\|"\|"\\_/ | |--| /___ |")||")|_" ________| | `\ |" ||" |_ | `-----------' \|/ ' | | ||\/||")<" /"\|" /"/"\|\ | _____ '-. .--..,__ |_\_/| ||" _> \_/|" \_\_/|"\|_ ) ===->{::::.. _`:- / .-' `""""'` |/_ (@) ` <""|"|/"| /<" >==-=-=-=-=-==-< (@) (@) _> | |\_|"\_> (@) (@) >=-=-=-=-=-==-=-=< \ __, \______/| =======.==. _=-_-"-_|=_=`\_________________________ /___ |")|")/"\/"\|\/| _=_=-_-"| -=_=)========================` `\ |")|"\\_/\_/| | =_jgs=_|=_-./ ^ ======='=='` (J U S T B E C A R E F U L W H E R E Y O U P U T T H E C A R R O T !) (art by j.stark) ============================================================ >-->From The FunnyBone: Dr. Suess's Lost Tongue Twisters _.---,_ .' `'. \ __..-'\ }-"` \ This is this cat /__,,..---.._| \ | This is is cat |---..__ | / ``"-./ This is how cat .'---...__ | .' ``"-./ This is to cat ,--./...,,,__ / '--.'__ __```.-. /._ This is keep cat / ` ` ' `=/.-.|-._) | .-. .-. "\\ / This is a cat || O| | O| ""=='_\ .-' '-'o '-' ""=\` This is fool cat `''--/- ""=-,\--._ .---|- ( ""=-. \` This is busy cat \ /`)"=."=|'-. '. _.-' ' "=|\| This is for cat (`----` '="=|/ `-. "=/` This is forty cat '. =/ \ =| This is seconds cat .-. |` "=| ( ~._ | "==| _.-~`\ \ ~. |'"="| _.-~ ) ; ~-.|.-._|_.-~ / Now read the THIRD word, / _-( /-.__ ( in each line, from the '._..--~~`/`/-'\-._ `~~- ; start. jgs /"=| |" =\~-...___.-~ /=" / | "==\ / = (_ \ "==\ ;="= `\_) =="\ =============================================================== -------------- Bizarre December Holidays --------------- December 1 is National Pie Day and Eat A Red Apple Day December 2 is National Fritters Day December 3 is National Roof-Over-Your-Head Day December 4 is Wear Brown Shoes Day December 5 is National Sacher Torte Day December 6 is National Gazpacho Day and Mitten Tree Day December 7 is National Cotton Candy Day December 8 is Take It In The Ear Day December 9 is National Pastry Day December 10 is Festival For The Souls Of Dead Whales December 11 is National Noodle Ring Day December 12 is National Ding-A-Ling Day December 13 is Ice Cream and Violins Day December 14 is National Bouillabaisse Day December 15 is National Lemon Cupcake Day December 16 is National Chocolate Covered Anything Day December 17 is Underdog Day and National Maple Syrup Day December 18 is National Roast Suckling Pig Day December 19 is Oatmeal Muffin Day December 20 is Games Day December 21 is Look At The Bright Side Day, National Flashlight Day, National French Fried Shrimp Day, and Hamburger Day December 22 is National Date-Nut Bread Day December 23 is Roots Day December 24 is National Egg Nog Day December 25 is National Pumpkin Pie Day December 26 is National Whiners Day December 27 is National Fruitcake Day December 28 is Card Playing Day and National Chocolate Day December 29 is Pepper Pot Day December 30 is Festival Of Enormous Changes At The Last Minute and National Bicarbonate Of Soda Day December 31 is Unlucky Day ============================================================== >-->From Our Friend PatDeE :) __ [_ | _____||_____ .'` _ || .'`\ ,;;, / _[_]_ || / | _(\()/)___ | (") \/ | | /__(/\)___/| | >/ . \< | || || || | \_:_/ | _.'| || || '-----...----`\ |____||____|/ | | \ | | | '.__/ jgs | | >Merry Christmas! Your Christmas card has arrived!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! This is a lovely CHRISTmas card theme. Sound on and click link below http://www.animatronics.org/santa.htm --- ...Awesome! Thank You PatDeE! Thanks to sub-freezing temps here for the last forever, we've got our white Christmas locked in for Ohio! ;) -<>- My Morning Run! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sOOlUR9Cg1Q --- ...Wow! Like Spiderman in the making! Thanks PatDeE! Bet they had lots of 'it only hurts when I laugh' moments! -<>- >WHY ATHLETES CAN'T HAVE REGULAR JOBS... Chicago Cubs outfielder Andre Dawson on being a role model: "I wan' all dem kids to do what I do, to look up to me. I wan' all the kids to copulate me." New Orleans Saint RB George Rogers when asked about the upcoming season: "I want to rush for 1,000 or 1,500 yards, whichever comes first." And, upon hearing Joe Jacobi of the 'Skin's say: "I'd run over my own mother to win the Super Bowl," Matt Millen of the Raiders said: "To win, I'd run over Joe's Mom, too." Torrin Polk, University of Houston receiver, on his coach, John Jenkins: "He treats us like men. He lets us wear earrings.." Football commentator and former player Joe Theismann: "Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein." Senior basketball player at the University of Pittsburgh: "I'm going to graduate on time, no matter how long it takes." (Now that is beautiful) Bill Peterson, a Florida State football coach: "You guys line up alphabetically by height.." And, "You guys pair up in groups of three, and then line up in a circle." Boxing promoter Dan Duva on Mike Tyson going to prison: "Why would anyone expect him to come out smarter? He went to prison for three years, not Princeton." Stu Grimson, Chicago Blackhawks left wing, explaining why he keeps a color photo of himself above his locker: "That's so when I forget how to spell my name, I can still find my clothes." Lou Duva, veteran boxing trainer, on the Spartan training regimen of heavyweight Andrew Golota: "He's a guy who gets up at six o'clock in the morning, regardless of what time it is." Chuck Nevitt, North Carolina State basketball player, explaining to Coach Jim Valvano why he appeared nervous at practice: "My sister's expecting a baby, and I don't know if I'm going to be an uncle or an aunt." Frank Layden , Utah Jazz president, on a former player: "I asked him, 'Son, what is it with you? Is it ignorance or apathy?' He said, 'Coach, I don't know and I don't care.'" Shelby Metcalf, basketball coach at Texas A&M, recounting what he told a player who received four F's and one D: "Son, looks to me like you're spending too much time on one subject." In the words of NC State great Charles Shackelford: "I can go to my left or right, I am amphibious." Amarillo High School and Oiler coach Bum Phillips when asked by Bob Costas why he takes his wife on all the road trips, Phillips responded: "Because she is too darn ugly to kiss good-bye." --- ...TeeHee! Rich! Thanks PatDeE! ============================================================== >-->From Our Friend Wesley :) __ [_ | _____||_____ .'` _ || .'`\ ,;;, / _[_]_ || / | _(\()/)___ | (") \/ | | /__(/\)___/| | >/ . \< | || || || | \_:_/ | _.'| || || '-----...----`\ |____||____|/ | | \ | | | '.__/ jgs | | Merry Christmas to You and Yours and May The Good Lord continue to Shower Us With Blessings . Amen ! --- ...AMEN! Thanks Wesley! -<>- Wesley sent us the video from this page ... Christmas With Pets! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/christmaspets.html --- ...I just love that video! Thanks Wesley! -<>- ) _ \ ) (_) _ () \ .-'` \ ) {_} () .-'````'-. / ) \ / `'-. ___ /.------. \| \ () \ .-'`___`;/ __ `\ | __ () | .'.-'` __'.| o/__\o |/ / /| \/ / o /__\o\ \\// /; // / ._ \_| \\//|`-.__.-'|\ '; / / \ .' \-.___.'| || |/ \/ `._ '-/ | || '.___./ . '-.\_.-' __'-._||_.-' _ / .`""===(||).___.(||)(||)----'(||)===...__ `"jgs"`""=====""""========"""====...__ `""==._ `"=. `"=. `"=. >Christmas Songs: Bleached Yule ( White Christmas ) Castaneous-colored Seed Vesicated in a Conflagration ( Chestnuts Roasting over an Open Fire ) Singular Yearning for the Twin Anterior Incisors ( All I want for Christmas is my Two Front Teeth ) Righteous Darkness ( O Holy Night ) Arrival Time: 2400 hrs – Weather: Cloudless ( He came upon a Midnight Clear ) Loyal Followers Advance ( O Come All Ye Faithful ) Far Off in a Feeder ( Away in a Manger ) Array the Corridor ( Deck the Halls ) Bantam Male Percussionist ( The Little Drummer Boy ) Monarchial Triad ( We Three Kings ) Nocturnal Noiselessness ( Silent Night ) Jehovah Deactivate Blithe Chevaliers ( God Rest Ye Merry Gentleman ) Red Man En Route to Borough ( Santa Claus is Coming to Town ) Frozen Precipitation Commence ( Let it Snow ) Proceed and Enlighten on the Pinnacle ( Go Tell it on the Mountain ) The Quadruped with the Vermilion Probiscis ( Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer ) Query Regarding Identity of Descendant ( What Child is This ) Delight for this Planet ( Joy to the World ) Give Attention to the Melodious Celestial Beings ( Hark the Herald Angels Sing ) The Dozen Festive 24 Hour Intervals ( The Twelve Days of Christmas ) -<>- HO .----. HO .' ,_ \ _ HO /__ ( \| / ( . {___`'-.\{_} | `|_ /6)6`'-._} \_.'_} |/_ _7 | {_.'| |5-.' /( | \{\ /:'`} \ /.\__/ _.'`\ \ ; o ``` \ ; o \ \_ | o \.'` } ; o_ {__.'\ \==[_]=======|/) | `; .' /_/ / `- / / / /\ \ {`-._/ \ _.'`} ;-.__} {__.'\ __/ / \_ \ ( ` / / / jgs '.__/ (__.' >Similarities Between Santa and Office Administrator : Santa is bearded, corpulent, and dresses funny. When you ask Santa for something, the odds of receiving what you wanted are infinitesimal. Santa seldom answers your mail. When you ask Santa where he gets all the stuff he's got, he says, "Elves make it for me." Santa doesn't care about your deadlines. Your parents ascribed supernatural powers to Santa, but did all the work themselves. Nobody knows who Santa has to answer to for his actions. Santa laughs entirely too much. Santa thinks nothing of breaking into your $HOME. Only a lunatic says bad things about Santa in his presence. -<>- A farmer got pulled over by a state trooper for speeding, and the trooper started to lecture the farmer about his speed, and in general began to throw his weight around to try to make the farmer uncomfortable. Finally, the trooper got around to writing out the ticket. As he was doing that, he kept swatting at some flies that were buzzing around his head. The farmer said, "Having some problems with circle flies there, are ya?" The trooper stopped writing the ticket and said, "Well, yeah, if that's what they are called -- I never heard of circle flies." So the farmer said, "Well, circle flies are common on farms. See, they're called circle flies because they're almost always found circling around the back end of a horse." The trooper said, "Oh," and went back to writing the ticket. Then after a minute he stopped and said, "Hey, wait a minute -- are you trying to call me a horse's reaar end?" The farmer said, "Oh no, officer. I have too much respect for law enforcement to even think about calling you such a name." The trooper said, "Well, that's a good thing," and went back to writing the ticket. After a long pause, the farmer said, "Hard to fool them flies, though." --- ...LOL! Thanks Wesley! =============================================================== >-->In The Worldly News: [Politics] >From Patriot Update: Obama's "Merry Christmas" Takes Away Internet Freedom TOMORROW http://tinyurl.com/2ag6h9b New Census May Complicate Obama 2012 Bid http://tinyurl.com/2a2eefe START Must Be Stopped http://tinyurl.com/2faramh DREAM Act Goes Down in Flames in Senate http://tinyurl.com/28qyxs6 Say Thanks to the heroes that defend us everyday http://tinyurl.com/27t2cpq -<>- >From Taipan Daily: China Is Waking Up to an Inflation Nightmare http://tinyurl.com/28xzat4 Done With It? Winter -- and Oil -- Are Just Getting Started! http://tinyurl.com/2e7o8ks -<>- >From BizarreNews: -- Skunk stinks up 800 Christmas presents ------- PURCELL, Okla. - An Oklahoma volunteer group said a skunk got into its storage facility and sprayed nearly 800 presents collected for children in low-income families. Peggy Christian with McClain County Operation Christmas said volunteers have been attempting to salvage as many of the smelly gifts as possible before the planned delivery run Friday, KOCO-TV, Oklahoma City, reported. "The ones laying out, they have been sprayed with Febreeze many, many times," Christian said. Christian said the volunteer group, which handed out 786 gifts in 2009, is accepting donations before 5 p.m. Thursday at the Purcell Multi- Purpose Center and after 5 p.m. at the Purcell Police Department. Christian told KOTV, Tulsa, Okla., support has been pouring in from the community since the incident with the skunk. "I've already had a lot of phone calls. People here locally that have called and said 'What can we do to help?'" she said. -- Record set at pie eating contest ---------- WIGAN, England - A British man participating in the World Pie Eating Championship set a world record by downing a saucer-sized meat pie in only 23.91 seconds. Organizers of the competition said Neil Collier, 42, bested the previous record of 35.86 seconds, set by former champion Barry Rigby, 37, at Tuesday's contest at Harry's Bar in Wigan, England, The Guardian reported Wednesday. "He just seemed to open his throat and down it went," organizer Tony Callaghan said. "He's from Bolton, mind, which is crying shame for a Wiganer to have to say, but he's certainly learned how to eat pies somewhere. Probably in Wigan." Official Iain Macauley said Collier narrowly avoid- ed disqualification by starting to eat his pie only a fraction of a second after the starting signal was given. =============================================================== >-->From Our Friend Sandi :) _..-"""---._ .-" '. .t __ '. /` .\_.--' ; | ' . ; __ __ ; \' ./`--' .`'---'. '--`\ '-'{ . ' .. ' . } \_.._._,.___..___..__/ \_.' / '. .' \ '._/ // \o) )( (o/ \\ \\ / \ // /\_, .\__/. ,_/\ / /(_.' '._)\ \ Oh MY! ; \ /\ / ; |) '---'`\/`'---' ) | | } { }| ; { ( ) ; \( ( / jgs '. } ) .' `"-...__...-"` >Blondes... Ventriloquist A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and one night he's doing a show in a small town in Arkansas. With his dummy on his knee, he starts going through his usual dumb blonde jokes, when a blonde woman in the 4th row stands on her chair. She starts shouting: "I've heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes. What makes you think you can stereotype women that way? What does the color of a person's hair have to do with her worth as a human being? It's guys like you who keep women like me from being respected at work and in the community and from reaching our full potential as a person. Because you and your kind continue to perpetuate discrimination against not only blondes, but women in general .... and all in the name of humor!" The embarrassed ventriloquist begins to apologize, when the blonde yells, "You stay out of this, mister…..I'm talking to that little nerd sitting on your knee!" --- ...LOL! Thanks Sandi! -<>- __ [_ | _____||_____ .'` _ || .'`\ ,;;, / _[_]_ || / | _(\()/)___ | (") \/ | | /__(/\)___/| | >/ . \< | || || || | \_:_/ | _.'| || || '-----...----`\ |____||____|/ | | \ | | | '.__/ jgs | | >HOLY HUMOR: A father was approached by his small son who told him proudly, "I know what the Bible means!" His father smiled and replied, "What do you mean, you 'know' what the Bible means? The son replied, "I do know!" "Okay," said his father. "What does the Bible mean?" "That's easy, Daddy..." the young boy replied excitedly," It stands for Basic Information Before Leaving Earth.' -- There was a very gracious lady who was mailing an old family Bible to her brother in another part of the country. "Is there anything breakable in here?" asked the postal clerk. "Only the Ten Commandments." answered the lady. -- "Somebody has said there are only two kinds of people in the world there are those who wake up in the morning and say, "Good morning, Lord" and there are those who wake up in the morning and say, "Good Lord, it's morning." -- A minister parked his car in a no-parking zone in a large city because he was short of time and couldn't find a space with a meter. Then he put a note under the windshield wiper that read: "I have circled the block 10 times. If I don't park here, I'll miss my appointment. Forgive us our trespasses." When he returned, he found a citation from a police officer along with this note "I've circled this block for 10 years. If I don't give you a ticket I'll lose my job. Lead us not into temptation." -- There is the story of a pastor who got up one Sunday and announced to his congregation: "I have good news and bad news. The good news is, we have enough money to pay for our new building program. The bad news is, it's still out there in your pockets." -- While driving in Pennsylvania, a family caught up to an Amish carriage. The owner of the carriage obviously had a sense of humor, because at the back of carriage was a hand printed sign... "Energy efficient vehicle: Runs on oats and grass. Caution: Do not step in exhaust. -- A Sunday School teacher began her lesson with a question, "Boys and girls, what do we know about God?" A hand shot up in the air. "He is an artist!" said the kindergarten boy. "Really? How do you know?" the teacher asked. "You know - Our Father, who does art in Heaven... " -- A minister waited in line to have his car filled with gas just before a long holiday weekend. The attendant worked quickly, but there were many cars ahead of him. Finally, the attendant motioned him toward a vacant pump. "Reverend," said the young man, "I'm so sorry about the delay. It seems as if everyone waits until the last minute to get ready for a long trip.." The minister chuckled, "I know what you mean. It's the same in my business." -- People want the front of the bus, the back of the church, and the center of attention. -- Sunday after church, a Mom asked her very young daughter what the lesson was about. The daughter answered, "Don't be scared, you'll get your quilt." Needless to say, the Mom was perplexed. Later in the day, the pastor stopped by for tea and the Mom asked him what that morning's Sunday school lesson was about. He said "Be not afraid, thy comforter is coming." -- The minister was preoccupied with thoughts of how he was going to ask the congregation to come up with more money than they were expecting for repairs to the church building. Therefore, he was annoyed to find that the regular organist was sick and a substitute had been brought in at the last minute. The substitute wanted to know what to play. "Here's a copy of the service," he said impatiently. "But, you'll have to think of something to play after I make the announcement about the finances." During the service, the minister paused and said, "Brothers and Sisters, we are in great difficulty; the roof repairs cost twice as much as we expected and we need $4,000 more. Any of you who can pledge $100 or more, please stand up." At that moment, the substitute organist played "The Star Spangled Banner." And that is how the substitute became the regular organist! -- Give me a sense of humor, Lord, Give me the grace to see a joke, To get some humor out of life, And pass it on to other folk! --- ...LOL! Good ones! Thanks Sandi! ============================================================= >-->From Our Friend Johanna :) .-""""""""""-. / `\ / .--.---.-.-.--.-;. ; { ' . ' . ' . '} | {__'_,__.__'__.__'_} | / _ _ \ | ; / \ / \ ; | | |0| |0| | \ | \_/ \_/ | .-'\; \ / ; |. ' \ '. .' / \ ` / '. '-.__.-' .' '--' '-._ _.-' jgs '''' With the rise of social media, more and more senior citizens are texting and tweeting. Here is a guide to some of the common codes modified so Seniors can use them communicating with their peers: ATD: At The Doctor's BFF: Best Friend Farted BTW: BringThe Wheelchair BYOT: Bring Your Own Teeth CBM: Covered By Medicare CUATSC: See You At The Senior Center DWI: Driving While Incontinent FWB: Friend With Beta Blockers FWIW: Forgot Where I Was FYI: Found Your Insulin GGPBL: Gotta Go, Pacemaker Battery Low! GHA: Got Heartburn Again HGBM: Had Good Bowel Movement IMHO: Is My Hearing-Aid On? LMDO: Laughing My Dentures Out LOL: Living On Lipitor LWO: Lawrence Welk's On OMMR: On My Massage Recliner OMSG: Oh My! Sorry, Gas. ROTFL- CGU: Rolling On The Floor Laughing And Can't Get Up SGGP: Sorry, Gotta Go Poop TTYL: Talk To You Louder WAITT: Who Am I Talking To? WTFA: Wet The Furniture Again WTP: Where's The Prunes? WWNO: Walker Wheels Need Oil --- ...LOL! Good Ones! Thanks Johanna! ========================================================== >-->From Our Friend PatDeE :) HO .----. HO .' ,_ \ _ HO /__ ( \| / ( . {___`'-.\{_} | `|_ /6)6`'-._} \_.'_} |/_ _7 | {_.'| |5-.' /( | \{\ /:'`} \ /.\__/ _.'`\ \ ; o ``` \ ; o \ \_ | o \.'` } ; o_ {__.'\ \==[_]=======|/) | `; .' /_/\ _\8/_ ,;;, / `- / / \ \ _(7_|o o o|.-\;;/-. / /\ \ \ \ |\ \\| o o ||__||__| {`-._/ \ _.'`} \ \ __|\\ \|o o o||""||""|____ ;-.__} {__.'\ /(_\ _\/ |_\\_|-----'|__||__| /__ __/ / \_ \ '---'.|\________________________/---` ( ` / / / /(___`\_/|_________________/|_______ jgs '.__/ (__.' '-----------------------------------` >Marine Stabbed by Suspected Shoplifter November 27,2010 Associated Press AUGUSTA, Ga. - A U.S. Marine reservist collecting toys for children was stabbed when he helped stop a suspected shoplifter in eastern Georgia. Best Buy sales manager Orvin Smith told The Augusta Chronicle that man was seen on surveillance cameras Friday putting a laptop under his jacket at the Augusta store. When confronted, the man became irate, knocked down an employee, pulled a knife and ran toward the door. Outside were four Marines collecting toys for the service branch's "Toys For Tots" program. Smith said the Marines stopped the man, but he stabbed one of them, Cpl. Phillip Duggan, in the back. The cut did not appear to be severe. The suspect was transported to the local hospital with two broken arms, a broken leg, possible broken ribs, assorted lacerations and bruises he obtained when he fell trying to run after stabbing the Marine. The suspect, whose name was not released, was held until police arrived. The Richmond County Sheriff's office said it is investigating. Hmmmmmmmmmm ! --- ...Hmmmmmm indeed! Thanks PatDeE! -<>- >Ironic... This next year, both Groundhog Day and the State of the Union address occur on the same day. As Air America Radio pointed out, "It is an ironic juxtaposition of events; one involves a meaningless ritual in which we look to a creature of little intelligence for prognostication while the other involves a groundhog." --- ...Wow! another ... Hmmmmm. TeeHee! Thanks PatDeE! -<>- >Mensa Invitational The Washington Post's Mensa Invitational once again invited readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition. Here are the winners: 1. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period of time. 2. Ignoranus : A person who's both stupid and an asshole. 3. Intaxicaton : Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with. 4. Reintarnation : Coming back to life as a hillbilly. 5. Bozone ( n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future. 6. Foreploy : Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid. 7. Giraffiti : Vandalism spray-painted very, very high 8. Sarchasm : The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it. 9. Inoculatte : To take coffee intravenously when you are running late. 10. Osteopornosis : A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.) 11. Karmageddon : It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer. 12. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you. 13. Glibido : All talk and no action. 14. Dopeler Effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly. 15. Arachnoleptic Fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web. 16. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out. 17. Caterpallor ( n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating. The Washington Post has also published the winning submissions to its yearly contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for common words. And the winners are: 1. Coffee, n.. The person upon whom one coughs. 2. Flabbergasted, adj. Appalled by discovering how much weight one has gained. 3. Abdicate, v. To give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach. 4. Esplanade, v. To attempt an explanation while drunk. 5. Willy-nilly, adj. Impotent. 6.. Negligent, adj. Absentmindedly answering the door when wearing only anightgown. 7. Lymph, v.. To walk with a lisp. 8. Gargoyle, n. Olive-flavored mouthwash. 9. Flatulence, n. Emergency vehicle that picks up someone who has been run over by a steamroller. 10. Balderdash, n. A rapidly receding hairline. 11. Testicle, n. A humorous question on an exam. 12. Rectitude, n. The formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists. 13. Pokemon, n. A Rastafarian proctologist. 14. Oyster, n. A person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms. 15. Frisbeetarianism, n. The belief that, after death, the soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there. 16. Circumvent, n. An opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men. --- ...HaHa! Thanks PatDeE! =================================================================== ___ / __'. .-"""-. .-""-| | '.'. / .---. \ / .--. \ \___\ \/ /____| | / / \ `-.-;-(`_),____.-'._ ; ; `.-" "-:_,(o:==..`-. '. .-"-, | | / \ / `\ `. \ / .-. \ \ \ | Y __...\ \ \ / / \/ /\ | | | .--""--.| .-' \ '.`---' / \ \ / / |` \' _...--.; '---'` \ '-' / jgs /_..---.._ \ .'\\_ `. `--'` .' (_) `'/ (_) / `._ _.'| .' ``````` '-...--'` "A Visit From St. Nicholas" by Clement Clarke Moore (ASCII art by joan stark) `'`;, ___H_ _(`) _ _ 'Twas the night before Christmas _/\ \ ( ) ) (o\_/o) and all through the house... /\__\\____\( )_) |. .| Not a creature was stirring, ||""||''''| |`| =\ /= not even a mouse. ~~~`""""`""""`~~~~~~ ^ _ _ _ _ The stockings were hung |=| |=| |~| |=| o _ by the chimney with care, | | | | | | | | |(')---.| In hopes that St. Nicholas /(| /(| /(| /(| |~~|o _ | would soon be there. (_/ (_/ (_/ (_/ |===|(')---.| |~~| | The children were all nestled _,_ o _|=======| all snug in their beds, _,_(( ) |(')---.| While visions of sugar plums (( )`-`_,_ |~~| | danced in their heads. '-' (( ) |=======| `-` o _ And Mamma in her 'kerchief, ___, |(')---.| and I in my cap, /(__\ .---. |~~| | Had just settled our brains |__)__| / \_\ |=======| for a long winter's nap. ,@@. .@@, |_____|\| ,@@ ^ @@, //. .\\ (IIIIIIIIIII) When out on the lawn `"\_=_/"` ( ^ ) ) ; ( there arose such a clatter, \_=_/ ( ;|; ) I sprang from my bed ( ;`|`; ( to see what was the matter. * ____ . * ) ;' | '; ( .'_ '. (=@'--|--'@=) Away to the window ' ` `)a \ . ' ) '; | ;` ( I flew like a flash, . * /_ | ( ;___|___; ) Tore open the shutters ,__.=' / + ' ),;=======;,( and threw up the sash. + '.____.' . ~ ~ ' . . The moon on the breast ' * . _\/ \/_ of the new-fallen snow _\/\/_ Gave the lustre of mid-day . * _\_\_\/\/_/_/_ to objects below. _ _H_ + / /_/\/\_\ \ + [_] (_)_ _/\/\_ When, what to my wondering |=( : ) . /\ /\ eyes should appear, ' |( : ) * : * ' But a miniature sleigh, `~~`~~`"""`~~`~ . _\/ \/_ . and eight tiny reindeer. * \ \ / / * __. .--, -=>: X :<=- With a little old driver, .=,{\/ _/ /`) * / _/ \_ \ * so lively and quick, . ' (`._(_.;` / ' /\ /\ ' I knew in a moment . ' \_________/ * ' * it must be St. Nick. (___Y_____Y___, .-/___,-/___,-/___,-/___, . ' .-/___,-/___,-/___,-/___, ) More rapid than eagles `\ _ )`\ _ )`\ _ )`\ _ )< his coursers they came. /< <\ ()<_{:' /_____\ He had a broad face `'//\\'` {`_______`} and a little round belly, // \\ // . . \\ That shook when he laughed, /' '\ ( (__O__) ) like a bowl full of jelly. {[]==u `-'} { } He was chubby and plump, ____ /{ }\ a right jolly old elf, .'` `\ / '. .' \ And I laughed when I saw him, ;---.._ \ /_/ `"` \_\ in spite of myself; ,=,==, \_...__\ | {__}###[_]###{__} __\|_/__ | a - '.| (_/\_________/\_) A wink of his eye | || |--.o.--'(_) |___|___| and a twist of his head, | || |-' = '-` )-. jgs |--|--| Soon gave me to know |___||___| ) \ (__)`(__) I had nothing to dread. |"""||"""| ) | |__ || _| ) | He spoke not a word, /` )||__\'\;'--.-' | but went straight to his work, \ /`-;( / .' / And filled all the stockings; '-.; '--| ; .-'| [IIIII] then turned with a jerk, `'--.;--'...-' [IIIII]=| |=====|=| And laying his finger |=====| | aside of his nose, | | | And giving a nod, _/\_ __/\__ | | | up the chimney he rose; ) (_ _) .' ( | | \ `) '.( ) .' (` | ; \ He sprang to his sleigh, `-._\()/__(~` |`'. \ \ to his team gave a whistle, ()() \ ; \ \ And away they all flew / |`\ \' \.'| like the down of a thistle. ) : ( \ .'|_/ `)_/` '._:_/ But I heard him exclaim, Ere he drove out of sight, "Happy Christmas to all, and to all a Good Night !" __. .--, .-/___,-/___,-/___,-/___, _.-.=,{\/ _/ /`) .-/___,-/___,-/___,-/___, ) _..-'`-(`._(_.;` / `\ _ )`\ _ )`\ _ )`\ _ )<`--''` (__\_________/___, /< <\ -->From The Mouth: _ {_} / \ / \ /_____\ {`_______`} // . . \\ (/(__7__)\) |'-' = `-'| | | /\ /\ / '. .' \ /_/ `"` \_\ {__}###[_]###{__} (_/\_________/\_) |___|___| jgs |--|--| (__)`(__) ---------- Twenty Ways to Confuse Santa Cllaus ---------- 1. Instead of milk and cookies, leave him a salad, and a note explaining that you think he could stand to lose a few pounds. 2. While he's in the house, go find his sleigh and write him a speeding ticket. 3. Leave him a note, explaining that you've gone away for the holidays. Ask if he would mind watering your plants. 4. While he's in the house, replace all his reindeer with exact replicas. Then wait and see what happens when he tries to get them to fly. 5. Keep an angry bull in your living room. If you think a bull goes crazy when he sees a little red cape, wait until he sees that big, red Santa suit! 6. Build an army of mean-looking snowmen on the roof, hold- ing signs that say "We hate Christmas," and "Go away Santa." 7. Leave a note by the telephone, telling Santa that Mrs. Claus called and wanted to remind him to pick up some milk and a loaf of bread on his way home. 8. Throw a surprise party for Santa when he comes down the chimney. Refuse to let him leave until the strippers arrive. 9. While he's in the house, find the sleigh and sit in it. As soon as he comes back and sees you, tell him that he shouldn't have missed that last payment, and take off. _____________,--, | | | | | | |/ .-.\ HANG IN THERE |_|_|_|_|_|_/ / `. SANTA |_|__|__|_; | \ |___|__|_/| | .'`} |_|__|__/ | | .'.'`\ |__|__|/ ; ; / / \.-"-. ||__|_; \ \ || /`___. \ |_|___/\ /;.`,\\ {_'___.;{} |__|_/ `;`__|`-.;| |C` e e`\ |___`L \__|__|__| | `'-o-' } ||___|\__)___|__||__|\ ^ /`\ |__|__|__|__|__|_{___}'.__.`\_.'} ||___|__|__|__|__;\_)-'`\ {_.-; |__|__|__|__|__|/` (`\__/ '-' |_|___|__|__/` | -jgs---|__|___|__/` \------------------- -.__.-.|___|___;` |.__.-.__.-.__.-.__ | | || | | | | -' '---' '---' \ /-' '---' '---' '-- | | '. .' | | | | '---' '---' '---' `-===-'`--' '---' '---' '---' | | | | | | | | -' '---' '---' '---' '---' '---' '---' '---' '-- | | | | | | | | '---' '---' '---' '---' '---' '---' '---' '---' 10. Leave a plate filled with cookies and a glass of milk out, with a note that says, "For The Tooth Fairy. :)" Leave a nother plate out with half a stale cookie and a few drops of skim milk in a dirty glass with a note that says, "For Santa. :(" 11. Take everything out of your house as if it's just been robbed. When Santa arrives, show up dressed like a police- man and say, "Well, well. They always return to the scene of the crime." 12. Leave out a copy of your Christmas list with last- minute changes and corrections. 13. While he's in the house, cover the top of the chimney with barbed wire. 14. Leave lots of hunting trophies and guns out where Santa's sure to see them. Go outside, yell, "Ooh! Look! A deer! And he's got a red nose!" and fire a gun. 15. Leave Santa a note, explaining that you've moved. Include a map with unclear and hard-to-read directions to your new house. 16. Set a bear trap at the bottom of the chimney. Wait for Santa to get caught in it, and then explain that you're sorry, but from a distance, he looked like a bear. 17. Leave out a Santa suit, with a dry-cleaning bill on it. 18. Paint "hoof-prints" all over your face and clothes. While he's in the house, go out on the roof. When he comes back up, act like you've been "trampled." Threaten to sue for personal injury. 19. Instead of ornaments, decorate your tree with Easter eggs. 20. Dress up like the Easter Bunny. Wait for Santa to come and then say, "This neighborhood ain't big enough for the both of us. (Copyright 2010 Aha! Jokes) -<>- .------. ( #-....'`\ \ # | _ )"====="| _ (_`"======="`_) /`"""""""""`\ | o _o\ | (_>| \ '.___/--# '. ;-._:'\ )`===| <)_/ __ .---""`====`--'\__.' `| / ()\ / \___..--' \_.-' | () | ; ; \ ()/ \ '. / _.'`\ `; ( `\ \_ \ .-`\ `\ jgs \___) `.______.' ** ALL I NEED TO KNOW I LEARNED FROM A SNOWMAN ** ** It's okay if you're a little bottom heavy. ** Hold your ground, even when the heat is on. ** Wearing white is always appropriate. ** Winter is the best of the four seasons. ** It takes a few extra rolls to make a good midsection. ** There's nothing better than a foul weather friend. ** We're all made up of mostly water. ** You know you've made it when they write a song about you. ** Accessorize! Accessorize! Accessorize! ** Avoid yellow snow. Don't get too much sun. ** It's embarrassing when you can't look down and see your feet. ** It's fun to hang out in your front yard. ** There's no stopping you once you're on a roll. ** It's not the size of the carrot, but the placement that counts. =========================================================== >-->From SermondFodder: , ------- . : . | | '.:.' {}} | .-'|'-. =========== * _ _ (( @ @ )) ..' ( \ / ))) o (( '. \ V / (( <=======[] (= ) ))`. ,. '(( `\ \_(( \___/ ))_\ \_ / | \ (____) / \/^\/ \ / `"` \ ( * ) Weird Snowman `. * .' gfj/98 *_**_*_**_*_**_*_**_* A Large What? I volunteered to be in charge of visitors at our local art gallery. After three hours, I was tired and hungry, so I visited MacDonalds on the way home. I ordered a large Butterfingers Slurry and a nine pack of chicken Mcnuggets. I brought them home and enjoyed them. The next morning as I was clearing my kitchen counter I noticed the sales slip from MacDonalds. It told me that I had received "9 nugs " and a "lgbutt". I had to wonder whether the latter was a threat or a promise since I am a rather slender person. -- Elizabeth Lewis -<>- .---. /.-. `\ {} /_____| {_______} (/e) (e\) (_.-^-._) /` ~ `\ ,-| |-, .' \ / '. / '._.' \ | / _{{\8/}}_ \ | | \_|:::::::|_/ | \ { }`\:::/`{ } / '.{_}_/:::\_{_}.' \__|:::::::|__/ > `"""""""` < | Y | | | | \ _ | _ / \ | / /___|___\ {___T___} | | | jgs / | \ (__/ \__) >Godly Giving "But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, so that your giving may be in secret. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you." - Matthew 6:3-4 How many people do you know who truly give just for the sake of giving because they know it is good and right to do? How many folks do you know who offer their services, time and emotions, simply because they have a real heart to help a fellow man? I wish I could say I knew many such people, but, the reality is, few individuals I know give out of a cheerful and loving heart expecting nothing from man or God in return. Even in my own life, while my heart may be acting in love, a small subtle part of me sometimes hopes that God will offer me something in return, such as a prayer answered. Unfortunately, God does not work this way. When a prayer is answered or a blessing bestowed, our Creator does not issue it as some sort of reward system or trophy for a job well done. No, my friends, God is above such juvenile behavior, and when the Lord gives, He gives because it is good and right to do so. The next time you are moved to reach out and give to someone, whether it be volunteering some time to help feed the homeless, work with cancer patients, or offering a supportive shoulder to a friend in need, do so expecting nothing in return, and the simple yet profound joy of knowing you did the right thing because it was the godly thing to do, and not because you would receive earthy recognition, will be all the reward you will need! God knows, not only our every word and deed, but He knows our true motives behind our actions. Show God what is in YOUR heart today! Contributed by Melanie Schurr -<>- _ ,;;{ }.._, _,;;;;;{ } a j-,_ {}`"""';{_}``};_ __/ `/( `'--.._,_ /, `'---;--'-;` / /'. _,\ | | )-'` _} |-\ {_,,;;;;\ `" \;;;;;;\ /;;/\;-'`} {___}',-"`\ .-"\ / | `-. \.__.-" / - . | / _..-`""` _,`~ ~- `~, -~ ^`- ~^ jgs `~ _/;-"" , = -~ ~- ^ ` ` ~^ ` ~-"` =~ =~ =~^ ~^ - ~ ~^- ~ `^ - ` -. ` ^ - ^- `~,_ ,`==,_ _,~``'` ~, ,=. ^ ~^ - ~ - ~- ` ~ "~ ~ =~^ `~ ` `,_ , ` ~-^ ` ~^ ~^ -~^ ^~ -~^ -~ `^ ~~ -~ >Fractured Christmas Carols No one can fracture a Christmas carol better than a kid. Sing along with these new takes on old favorites: Deck the Halls with Buddy Holly We three kings of porridge and tar On the first day of Christmas my tulip gave to me Later on we'll perspire, as we dream by the fire. He's makin a list, chicken and rice. Noel. Noel, Barney's the king of Israel. With the jelly toast proclaim Olive, the other reindeer. (From the Popeye version maybe?) Frosty the Snowman is a ferret elf, I say Sleep in heavenly peas In the meadow we can build a snowman, Then pretend that he is sparse and brown You'll go down in listerine Oh, what fun it is to ride with one horse, soap and hay O come, froggy faithful You'll tell Carol, "Be a skunk, I require" Good tidings we bring to you and your kid =========================== _v __* (__) ff ff ff ff {\/ (_(__).-. ff <_\__, <_\__, <_\__, <_\__, __,~~.(`>|-(___)/ ,_) o<_\__, (_ ff ~(_ ff ~(_ ff ~(_ ff~~~~~@ )\/_;-"`` | (___)~~//<_\__, <_\__, <_\__, <_\__, | \__________/| // >> (___)~~(___)~~(___)~~(___)~~~~\\_/_______\_// // >> // >> // >> // >> jgs `'---------'` >THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS, Legally Speaking Whereas, on or about the night prior to Christmas, there did occur at a certain improved piece of real property (hereinafter "the House") a general lack of stirring by all creatures therein, including, but not limited to a mouse. A variety of foot apparel, e.g., stocking, socks, etc., had been affixed by and around the chimney in said House in the hope and/or belief that St. Nick a/k/a/ St. Nicholas a/k/a/ Santa Claus (hereinafter "Claus") would arrive at sometime thereafter. The minor residents, i.e. the children, of the aforementioned House were located in their individual beds and were engaged in nocturnal hallucinations, i.e. dreams, wherein vision of confectionery treats, including, but not limited to, candies, nuts and/or sugar plums, did dance, cavort and otherwise appear in said dreams. Whereupon the party of the first part (sometimes hereinafter referred to as ("I"), being the joint-owner in fee simple of the House with the party of the second part (hereinafter "Mamma"), and said Mamma had retired for a sustained period of sleep. (At such time, the parties were clad in various forms of headgear, e.g., kerchief and cap. Suddenly, and without prior notice or warning, there did occur upon the unimproved real property adjacent and appurtenant to said House, i.e., the lawn, a certain disruption of unknown nature, cause and/or circumstance. The party of the first part did immediately rush to a window in the House to investigate the cause of such disturbance. At that time, the party of the first part did observe, with some degree of wonder and/or disbelief, a miniature sleigh (hereinafter "the Vehicle") being pulled and/or drawn very rapidly through the air by approximately eight (8) reindeer. The driver of the Vehicle appeared to be and in fact was, the previously referenced Claus. Said Claus was providing specific direction, instruction and guidance to the approximately eight (8) reindeer and specifically identified the animal co-conspirators by name: Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner and Blitzen (hereinafter "the Deer"). (Upon information and belief, it is further asserted that an additional co- conspirator named "Rudolph" may have been involved.) The party of the first part witnessed Claus, the Vehicle and the Deer intentionally and willfully trespass upon the roofs of several residences located adjacent to and in the vicinity of the House, and noted that the Vehicle was heavily laden with packages, toys and other items of unknown origin or nature. Suddenly, without prior invitation or permission, either express or implied, the Vehicle arrived at the House, and Claus entered said House via the chimney. Said Claus was clad in a red fur suit, which was partially covered with residue from the chimney, and he carried a large sack containing a portion of the aforementioned packages, toys, and other unknown items. He was smoking what appeared to be tobacco in a small pipe in blatant violation of local ordinances and health regulations. Claus did not speak, but immediately began to fill the stocking of the minor children, which hung adjacent to the chimney, with toys and other small gifts. (Said items did not, however, constitute "gifts" to said minor pursuant to the applicable provisions of the U.S. Tax Code.) Upon completion of such task, Claus touched the side of his nose and flew, rose and/or ascended up the chimney of the House to the roof where the Vehicle and Deer waited and/or served as "lookouts." Claus immediately departed for an unknown destination. However, prior to the departure of the Vehicle, Deer and Claus from said House, the party of the first part did hear Claus state and/or exclaim: "Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!" Or words to that effect. From: jmh@magicnet.net (Joseph M. Hillebrandt) This post is brought your way by Sermon Fodder and Joke A Day Ministries. To subscribe go to http://www.sermonfodder.com or drop an email note to Sermon_Fodder-subscribe@yahoogroups.com. Please leave this if you forward this to friends. ================================================================ >-->FUN Places To Net Visit :) Maxine On Jesus! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/maxineonjesus.html Bailey's Jesus http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/bailey.html God's Little Love Notes http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/notes.html Proud Of Our Troops 3 http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/troops3.html Life's Little Oops 7 http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/whoops7.html Jobs That Suck! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/jobs.html Parenting No-Nos http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/parenting.html Top Ways To Stay Healthy http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/stayhealthy.html World's Best Husbands! http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/husbands.html -<>- >From LynnLynn's Links: Melva/Most Wonderful Time www.silverandgoldandthee.com/Christmas/MostWonderful.html Marlene/New Christmas Page/Alan Jackson http://summerhoosier.250free.com/HTML3/Silent-Night.html Christmas Wishes Via Carol http://www.spiritisup.com/christmaswishescc.html carolyn w/ Santa Claus Is Back In Town ~ Elvis Presley http://carolynspreciousmemories.com/elvis/santaback.html Disney Christmas! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/disneychristmas.html Extreme Homes! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/exhomes.html If my nose was running money http://www.buffaloschips.com/huyu.htm Important Message http://www.buffaloschips.com/jkjhjgh.htm Impossible http://www.buffaloschips.com/hjkhyui.htm Jet Engine http://www.buffaloschips.com/kjki.htm John McCain http://www.buffaloschips.com/hjjhiu.htm Complaint http://www.buffaloschips.com/5l6k7j65.htm Complaint Dept01 http://www.buffaloschips.com/lk45j677.htm Complaint Dept02 http://www.buffaloschips.com/com.htm Complaints http://www.buffaloschips.com/poiiop.htm Complaint Dept http://www.buffaloschips.com/1231k.htm If You haven't joined LynnLynn's mailing List yet, send a blank e-mail to LynnLynns-links-subscribe@Yahoogroups.com ============================================================== >-->Quotes & Thunkers: "The best ideas come as jokes. Make your thinking as funny as possible." - David M. Ogilvy "I have learned that to be with those I like is enough." - Walt Whitman "Reading is to the mind what exercise is to the body." - Sir Richard Steele "I never know how much of what I say is true." - Bette Midler "I dote on his very absence." - William Shakespeare "Worry is a misuse of imagination." - Dan Zadra "I know nothing about sex because I was always married." - Zsa Zsa Gabor "I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception." - Groucho Marx "TV is chewing gum for the eyes." - Frank Lloyd Wright "Great. I just beat up Santa Claus." - Denis Leary as Gus in "The Ref" "I want an official Red Ryder, carbine action, two-hundred shot range model air rifle!" - Peter Billingsley as Ralphie in "A Chrisstmas Story" "Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas, kiss my ass. Kiss his ass. Kiss your ass. Happy Hanukkah." - Chevy Chase as Clark Griswold in "Christtmas Vacation" >Updated FUN STUFF URLS - Oh Yeah :) Shangy! ------------------------------------------------------------------------- http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/urls.html FUN URLS ------------------------------------------------------------------------- -->BECOMING A CHRISTIAN HOW TO BE A CHRISTIAN! ------------------------------------------------------------------------- -->FULL LENGTH - FREE On line AUDIO MP3 Chhristian Foundational Class http://www.truthortradition.com/modules.php?name=News&file=article&sid=61 NEW LIFE IN CHRIST! ------------------------------------------------------------------------- -->This is for all you who love food and DDARE to make it at home Yep. You guessed it - Recipes. These are Tried and True, Yummy to the Tummy, good old fashioned home cooking recipes that are EASY to do :) Visit Shangy's Easy-Does-It Home Recipes: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/easy.html Home Recipes >Got A good Recipe? SHARE IT HERE: Share A Recipe ************************************************************************ >TO SUBSCRIBE: Visit Here This Weeks regular Shangy emails OR For the Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com ************************************************************************