Questions I Ask Myself... :) Shangy! >Here are the details on our Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com To UnSubscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com Group home page: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ShangyFunList Through no fault of my own we suddenly became an adult club in the love and romance directory so you will have to confirm that you are an adult when you go here. I still have no idea how to change this back as it sends me around in a circle when I try! or Web Site: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/ShangyFunList.html Group email address: ShangyFunList@yahoogroups.com or email me here: bcrsystems@earthlink.net ================ *~* A REMINDER: For Facebook Users: Please Friend Me / Like Me here... http://tinyurl.com/cma6all ^~^ May God SUPER BLESS You As You Do! THANK YOU! :) ================ >-->HOT Off The 'Shangy' Press :) This super hottie is from our friend Jo Ann. No wonder it won an engineering award! This airport is awesome! As always, Give it plenty of time to load and Check it out here... .------, =\ \ .---. =\ \ | C~ \ =\ \ | `----------'------'----------, .' LI.-.LI LI LI LI LI LI LI.-.LI`-. \ _/.____|_|______.------,______|_|_____) / / =/ / =/ / =/ / jgs /_____,' Madeira Funchal Airport http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/funchalairport.html --- ...Pretty amazing! Thanks Jo Ann! ======================================================= >-->From TheFunnyBone: _.._ /` `\ | | Ice Cream Is Good For The Soul \._ _./ / `""""` \ | | Last week I took my children to a restaurant. \._ _./ My six-year-old son asked if he could say \ `""""` / grace. As we bowed our heads he said, "God is \## / good. God is great. Thank You for the food, \### / and I would even thank you more if Mom gets us jgs \##/ ice cream for dessert. And Liberty and justice \/ for all. Amen!" Along with the laughter from the other customers nearby, I heard a woman remark, "That's what's wrong with this country. Kids today don't even know how to pray. Asking God for ice-cream. Why, I never!" Hearing this, my son burst into tears and asked me, "Did I do it wrong? Is God mad at me?" As I held him and assured him that he had done a terrific job and God was certainly not mad at him, an elderly gentleman approached the table. He winked at my son and said, "I happen to know that God thought that was a great prayer." "Really?" my son asked. "Cross my heart." Then in a theatrical whisper he added, indicating the woman whose remark had started this whole thing, "Too bad she never asks God for ice cream. A little ice cream is good for the soul sometimes." Naturally, I bought my kids ice cream at the end of the meal. My son stared at his for a moment and then did something I will remember the rest of my life. He picked up his sundae and without a word walked over and placed it in front of the woman. With a big smile he told her, "Here, this is for you. Ice cream is good for the soul sometimes, and my soul is good already." ======================================================= +------------ BIZARRE HOLIDAYS ------------+ August 5 is National Mustard Day August 6 is Wiggle Your Toes Day August 7 is Sea Serpent Day August 8 is Sneak Some Zucchini Onto Your Neighbor's Porch Night August 9 is National Polka Festival August 10 is Lazy Day August 11 is Presidential Joke Day ======================================================= >-->From GoodCleanFun: MMM88&&&, ,MMM8&&&. `'MMM88&&&, MMMMM88&&&& 'MMM88&&&, MMMMM88&&&&&& 'MMM88&&&, MMMMM88&&&&&& 'MMM88&&& MMMMM88&&&&&& 'MMM88&&& MMMMM88&&&& MMM88&&& 'MMM8&&&' MMMM888&&&& 'MM88&&& MMMM88&&&&& MM88&&& MMMM88&&&&& MM88&&& ,MMM8&&&. MM88&&& MMMMM88&&&& ,MM88&&& MMMMM88&&&&&& MMM88&&&' MMMMM88&&&&&& MMM88&&&' MMMMM88&&&&&& MMM88&&&' MMMMM88&&&& MMM88&&&' 'MMM8&&&' MMM88&&&' MMM88&&&' :-) >Hearing Aids During a medical assessment before moving into a retirement home, a nurse asked my grandparents, "Do you need hearing aids?" "Yes," my grandmother answered. "But he doesn't like his, never wears it and leaves it at home." Then she added, "I always carry mine in my purse." -<>- >Just Like Mommy A two and a half year old walked into the bathroom while her mother was putting on make-up. "I'm going to look just like you mommy!" she announced. "Maybe, when you grow up," her mother told her. "No mommy, tomorrow. I just put on that Oil of Old Lady you always use." -<>- >Last Name Sczyelski, my last name, is a mouthful, so I was thrilled when my three- year-old niece learned to spell it. That is until my cousin said, "You can spell it any way you like; who'll know if it's wrong?" -<>- >Mother's Day Gift The young mother loved the picture frame her five-year-old son bought her for Mother's Day. She found a photograph of him and replaced the cat photo that came with the frame. He became upset: "Why are you putting a picture of me in there when I bought you a picture of a cat?" -<>- >Taking You Out My friend's wife returned from a tour of duty in the Middle East. To celebrate, he decided to take her out for a night on the town. Proud of her service record, he suggested she wear her uniform. Not only did a patriotic taxi driver refuse to accept money from them, but an appreciative citizen paid for her meal at the restaurant, and the theater manager upgraded their balcony seats to the orchestra. At the end of the evening, my friend turned to his wife. "I still get credit for taking you out, right?" ========================================================= >-->From Our Friend PatDeE :) _____ /.===.\ \ // \\ \/\ \\ // \ \ ` //' \ \ ||' \ \/ || \/\ \ () >Questions I ask myself: 1. Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety-one? 2. Why do croutons come in airtight packages? Aren't they just stale bread to begin with? 3. If people from Poland are called Poles, then why aren't people from Holland called Holes? 4. Why is a person who plays a piano called a pianist, but a person who drives a race car is not called a racist? 5. If it is true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for? 6. If lawyers are disbarred and clergy defrocked, then doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed? 7. If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP? 8. Do Lipton tea employees take 'coffee breaks'? 9. What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men? Flesh? 10. Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we supposed to do...write to them? Why don't they just put their pictures on the postage stamps so the mailmen can look for them while they deliver the mail? 11. Is it true that you never really learn to swear until you learn to drive? 12. If a cow laughed, would milk come out of her nose? 13. Whatever happened to Preparations A through G ? --- ...HaHa! Thanks PatDeE! -<>- /\ //\\ // \\ // \\ // \\ // ,-''-.\\ // /'``'. \\\ //.-':' | |\\ /// /` / / \\ //| | ,:-' \\ // \ '.__,-/ \\ jgs // `-...-' \\ //___AMERICA__OFFLINE___\\ '--------------------------` >Attributed to Jeff Foxworthy: If you can get arrested for hunting or fishing without a license, but not for en tering and remaining in the country illegally — you might live in a nation that was founded by geniuses but is run by idiots. If you have to get your parents’ permission to go on a field trip or to take an aspirin in school, but not to get an abortion — you might live in a nation that was founded by geniuses but is run by idiots. If you MUST show your identification to board an airplane, cash a check, buy liquor, or check out a library book and rent a video, but not to vote for who runs the government — you might live in a nation that was founded by geniuses but is run by idiots. If the government wants to prevent stable, law-abiding citizens from owning gun magazines that hold more than ten rounds, but gives twenty F-16 fighter jets to the crazy new leaders in Egypt — you might live in a nation that was founded by geniuses but is run by idiots. If, in the nation’s largest city, you can buy two 16-ounce sodas, but not one 24-ounce soda, because 24-ounces of a sugary drink might make you fat — you might live in a nation that was founded by geniuses but is run by idiots. If an 80-year-old woman or a three-year-old girl who is confined to a wheelchair can be strip-searched by the TSA at the airport, but a woman in a burka or a hijab is only subject to having her neck and head searched — you might live in a nation that was founded by geniuses but is run by idiots. If your government believes that the best way to eradicate trillions of dollars of debt is to spend trillions more — you might live in a nation that was founded by geniuses but is run by idiots. If a seven-year-old boy can be thrown out of school for saying his teacher is “cute,” but hosting a sexual exploration or diversity class in grade school is perfectly acceptable — you might live in a nation that was founded by geniuses but is run by idiots. If hard work and success are met with higher taxes and more government regulation and intrusion, while not working is rewarded with Food Stamps, WIC checks, Medicaid benefits, subsidized housing, and free cell phones — you might live in a nation that was founded by geniuses but is run by idiots. If the government’s plan for getting people back to work is to provide incentives for not working, by granting 99 weeks of unemployment checks, without any requirement to prove that gainful employment was diligently sought, but couldn’t be found — you might live in a nation that was founded by geniuses but is run by idiots. If you pay your mortgage faithfully, denying yourself the newest big-screen TV, while your neighbor buys iPhones, time shares, a wall-sized do-it-all plasma screen TV and new cars, and the government forgives his debt when he defaults on his mortgage — you might live in a nation that was founded by geniuses but is run by idiots. If being stripped of your Constitutional right to defend yourself makes you more “safe” according to the government — you might live in a nation that was founded by geniuses but is run by idiots. What a country! /_How about we give God a reason to continue blessing America ! _/ --- ...Amazing huh? Thanks PatDeE! =============================================== >-->From Our Friend LouiseA :) __ / .- /.-' |/,-'` .--. // _.-'''-._ //~`_\//_ _.;.--._.--.;._ '--| // .|` /( O / \ O )\ ` |~~~~~| ; '-' '-' ; _|__' | | (_) | / __) '| | . . | | __) | | `-.___.-' | .-. _ | ___)' | ; \.-./ ; | | / | |~~| .| \ `-` / __| |/ /_ | |====;___'._ _.'__ (_ _) \ /\"""""/\ `\ `| .'` '----------.`-`\^/`-`. \ |~~| | /~\ |`\ \ | | | |\| | \ `y | jgs | |\| | \ / | |\| | '.__.' |___|\|___| |===\_/===| | | | L | | | | | | | < < | | | | |____|____| .---' / \ / /| | '.______.' | | \__/ A group of 40 something guys discuss where they should meet for dinner. Finally it is agreed that they will meet at the Black Forest Inn because they have the prettiest waitresses and low-cut blouses. Ten years later when the guys are 50 something, the group again discusses where to meet. Finally it is agreed that they will meet at the Black Forest Inn because the food there is very good and they have a good wine selection. Ten years later when the guys are 60 something, the group again discusses where to meet. Finally it is agreed that they should meet at the Black Forest Inn because it's quiet and smoke-free. Ten years later when the guys are 70 something, the group again discusses where to meet. Finally it is agreed that they should meet at the Black Forest Inn because because the restaurant is wheelchair accessible and they have an elevator. Ten years later when the guys are 80 something, the group again discusses where to meet. Finally it is agreed that they should meet at the Black Forest Inn because they've never been there before. --- ...TeeHee! Thanks LouiseA! -<>- __ .' `'. / _ | #_/.\==/.\ (, \_/ \\_/ | -' | ,\ = / /| .-'|`-. __.' / | / | `-.__.' .-\ /-. | | { _/ \_ } | | `| | | | | '. | | .' jgs '-.| |.' `"` >Brilliance in Three Parts Part I ....... A. Back off and let those men who want to marry men, marry men. B. Allow those women who want to marry women, marry women. C. Allow those folks who want to abort their babies, abort their babies. D. In three generations, there will be no Democrats. I love it when a plan comes together! Part II: 10 Poorest Cities in America and how did it happen? City, State, % of People Below the Poverty Level: 1. Detroit, MI 32.5% 2. Buffalo, NY 29.9% 3. Cincinnati, OH 27.8% 4. Cleveland, OH 27.0% 5. Miami, FL 26.9% 5. St. Louis, MO 26.8% 7. El Paso, TX 26.4% 8. Milwaukee, WI 26.2% 9. Philadelphia, PA 25.1% 10. Newark, NJ 24.2% What do the top ten cities (over 250,000) with the highest poverty rate all have in common? Detroit, MI (1st on the poverty rate list) hasn't elected a Republican mayor since 1961 Buffalo, NY (2nd) hasn't elected one since 1954 Cincinnati, OH - (3rd) since 1984 Cleveland, OH - (4th) since 1989 Miami, FL - (5th) has never had a Republican mayor St. Louis, MO - (6th) since 1949 El Paso, TX - (7th) has never had a Republican mayor Milwaukee , WI - (8th) since 1908 Philadelphia, PA - (9th) since 1952 Newark, NJ - (10th) since 1907 Einstein once said, 'The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.' It is the poor who habitually elect Democrats .. yet they are still POOR. Part III: "You cannot help the poor by destroying the rich. You cannot strengthen the weak by weakening the strong. You cannot bring about prosperity by discouraging thrift. You cannot lift the wage earner up by pulling the wage payer down. You cannot further the brotherhood of man by inciting class hatred. You cannot build character and courage by taking away people's initiative and independence. You cannot help people permanently by doing for them, what they could and should do for themselves." --Abraham Lincoln --- ...Great ones! Thanks LouiseA! -<>- __ .' `'. / _ | #_/.\==/.\ (, \_/ \\_/ | -' | \ '= / /`-.__.' .-'`-.___|__ jgs / \ `. >THE OTHER TEN COMMANDMENTS 1. Prayer is not a "spare wheel" that you pull out when in trouble, but is a "steering wheel" that directs the right path throughout. 2. Why is a car's windshield so large & the rear view mirror so small? Because our PAST is not as important as our FUTURE. So, Look Ahead and Move on. 3. Friendship is like a BOOK. It takes few seconds to burn, but it takes years to write. 4. All things in life are temporary. If going well, enjoy it, they will not last forever. If going wrong, don't worry, they can't last long either. 5. Old Friends are Gold! New Friends are Diamond! If you get a Diamond, don't forget the Gold! Because to hold a Diamond, you always need a Base of Gold! 6. Often when we lose hope and think this is the end, GOD smiles from above and says, "Relax, sweetheart, it's just a bend, not the end! 7. When GOD solves your problems, you have faith in HIS abilities; when GOD doesn't solve your problems HE has faith in your abilities. 8. A blind person asked St. Anthony: "Can there be anything worse than losing eye sight?" He replied: "Yes, losing your vision!" 9. When you pray for others, God listens to you and blesses them, and sometimes when you are safe and happy, it means that someone has prayed for you. 10. WORRYING does not take away tomorrow's TROUBLES, it takes away today's PEACE. --- ...More great ones! Thanks LouiseA! -<>- .-"""-. #. == \ ### _ _# (_""(a)=(a) \ _\ | '. = / __/`---;_ jgs /` \___| `\ >A-POLITICAL APHORISMS The problem with political jokes is they get elected. ~ Henry Cate, VII We hang the petty thieves and appoint the great ones to public office. ~ Aesop If we got one-tenth of what was promised to us in these State of the Union speeches, there wouldn't be any inducement to go to heaven. ~ Will Rogers Politicians are the same all over. They promise to build bridges even where there is no river. ~ Nikita Khrushchev Why pay money to have your family tree traced; go into politics and your opponents will do it for you. ~ Author unknown Politicians are people who, when they see light at the end of the tunnel, go out and buy some more and to tunnel. ~ John Quinton A politician is a fellow who will lay down your life for his country. ~ Tex Guinan I have come to the conclusion that politics is too serious a matter to be left to the politicians. ~ Charles de Gaulle Instead of giving a politician the keys to the city, it might be better to change the locks. ~ Doug Larson -<>- Wife: "Do you want dinner?" Husband: "Sure! What are my choices?" Wife: "Yes or no." ------------ Girl: "When we get married, I want to share all your worries, troubles and lighten your burden." Boy: "It's very kind of you, darling, but I don't have any worries or troubles." Girl: "Well that's just because you're not married yet." ------------ After being laid off from five different jobs in six months, my Uncle Joe was hired by a warehouse. A week in, he lost control of a forklift and drove it off the loading dock. The owner said he'd have to withhold 10 percent of Uncle Joe's wages to pay for the repairs. "How much will it cost?" asked my uncle. "About $4,500," said the owner. "Hey, that's great!" exclaimed Uncle Joe. "For once, I've got job security!" ------------ During a quarrel with his parents, young Michael cried, "I want excitement, adventure, money, and beautiful women. I'll never find it here at home, so I'm leaving. Don't try and stop me!" With that, he headed toward the door. His father rose and walked up to him, as he grabbed the doorknob. "Didn't you hear what I said?" asked Michael. "I don't want you to try and stop me!" "Who's trying to stop you?" replied his father. "I'm going with you!" ------------ Fred goes to his first show at an art gallery and is looking at the paintings. One is a huge canvas that has black with yellow blobs of paint splattered all over it. The next painting is a murky gray color that has drips of purple paint streaked across it. Stumpy walks over to the artist and says, "I don't understand your paintings." "I paint what I feel inside me," explains the artist. "Have you ever tried Alka-Seltzer?" ------------ Look at ME!" boasted the fit old man to a group of young people. "Every morning I do fifty push-ups, fifty sit-ups, and walk two miles. I'm fit as a fiddle! And you want to know why? I don't smoke, I don't drink, I don't stay up late, and I don't chase after women!" He smiled at them, teeth white, eyes glittering, "And tomorrow, I'm going to celebrate my 95th birthday!" "Oh, really?" drawled one of the young onlookers, How? ------------ "The thing that attracted me to my husband was his pride. I'll never forget the first time I saw him, standing up on a hill, his hair blowing in the breeze, and he was too proud to run and get it." --- ...LOL! Good ones! Thanks LouiseA! =========================================================== >-->From Our Friend KarenF :) __ ."` `;. / .---'. \ \| . . |/ ( > ) \ -- / __)----(__ /` <_\__/_> `\ / : \ jgs | \ : | | >Fair is fair A guy is looking for a place to sit in a crowded library. He asked a girl in a university library: "Do you mind if I sit beside you? The girl replied with a loud voice: "I DON'T WANT TO SPEND THE NIGHT WITH YOU!" All the students in the library started staring at the guy; he was truly embarrassed and moved to another table. After a couple of minutes, the girl walked quietly to the guy's table and said with a laugh "I study psychology, and I know what a man is thinking. I guess you felt embarrassed, right? The guy then responded with a loud voice: "$500 FOR ONE NIGHT...THAT'S TOO MUCH!" All the people in the library looked at the girl in shock. The guy whispered in her ear: "I study law, and I know how to screw people." ==================================================== >-->In The Worldly News: >From Our Friend Geniann :) IF THE AMERICAN PEOPLE DON'T WAKE UP SOON THERE WILL BE NO AMERICA! Look who's new in the white house! http://tinyurl.com/kbrrspu --- ...Man oh man! Thanks Geniann! -<>- >From Our Friend Linda :) What's The Dumbest Thing You Could Say To A Congresswoman Who Lost Her Legs In Battle? Um, THIS. http://tinyurl.com/pedts5u --- ...Oh my goodness - bless her heart and those like her! Thanks Linda! -<>- >From BizarreNews: In the absolutely most adorable incidence of moral corruption and social decay you will hear all month, authorities say a 12-year-old boy in Johnstown, PA used a BB gun to rob a 10- year-old who was running a lemonade stand. Johnstown Sgt. Patrick Goggin says the 12-year-old approached the stand with what appeared to be a handgun in his pocket and threatened the younger boy. Goggin says the boys "got into a wrestling match over the money box" before the older boy took $30 and ran away. 30 bucks? That one heck of a lemonade business. Three other children chased the boy home and helped police track him down. That is when police determined the boy had a BB gun. Police aren't identifying the suspect because he'll be charged in juvenile court where most cases remain confidential. -<>- Have you ever heard the phrase, "One good turn deserves another"? This does not always apply. Maybe a better philosophy would be, "Don't bring home stray dogs, especially if you are a paraplegic who likes to sleep in the nude." This particular paraplegic apparently had a soft spot in his heart for a small, white, fluffy stray he had taken in about three weeks earlier. The dog repaid the kindness by eating one of his testicles while he slept. He was awakened by a "burning pain" in his mid-section, according to the initial police report. The 39-year-old man told police he sleeps in the nude and noticed the dog was between his legs. He also noticed the dog had blood on its muzzle and front feet. When the man looked further, according to the report, he noticed that "the dog had eaten one of his testicles." Police took the dog to a local veterinarian where it was euthanized and tested for rabies. The man, in a move that proves the universe has a perverse sense of humor, was taken to St. Bernards Regional Medical Center where he was treated for his injuries. *-- Raccoon steals woman's wallet on Florida beach --* FORT MYERS, Fla. - A Florida woman said a raccoon tried to run off with her wallet while she was visiting the beach with her two daughters. Danielle Araica said she and her daughters were visiting Bunche Beach in Fort Myers to see a Kemp's Ridley sea turtle named Tampa Red make her expected return home Monday and they were all in the water when Araica spotted a raccoon rifling through her bag, WZVN-TV, Fort Myers, reported Thursday. "I saw the raccoon in my bag, so I start running like a crazy woman," Araica said. Arairca said the raccoon ran off with her pink wallet in its mouth, but dropped it in some nearby woods. A young boy was able to recover the wallet and return it to Araica, she said. "I have some scratches and holes on my wallet now, but it's back and its safe," Araica said. Araica said she thinks the wallet theft was suspicious, as there was no food in her bag. "She knew what she wanted. She went right in there and got it," Araica said. "It was a trained raccoon to go steal money or wallets out of women's bags that was the theory we came up with at the beach." *-- Shark carcass dumped outside Massachusetts pub --* NANTUCKET, Mass. - Officials on Massachusetts' Nantucket Island said they do not know the identity or motive of a "prankster" who left a shark carcass on a pub's doorstep. John Smith, Nantucket's public works operations manager, said his office got a call at 7 a.m. Thursday to remove a dead shark from in front of the Sea Dog Brew Pub and he had to call in a front-end loader to cart away the 6-foot-long, 100-pound shark, the Boston Herald reported Friday. "In the summertime, there's always somebody who's a prankster," Smith said. He said a prankster filled a street with small "black back" tuna a few summers ago. "Fortunately this doesn't happen that often," he said. Sea Dog Brew Pub manager Jimmy Agnew said he was also perplexed by the shark. "It just made for an interesting day," he said. Agnew said a couple of people had to be removed from the bar before it closed at 3 a.m., but he didn't think any of the incidents were severe enough to result in a dead shark delivery. Smith said the carcass is being sent to be processed at a landfill and will eventually become topsoil. *-- World's first 'test-tube' burger to be on menu in London --* LONDON - A hamburger worth $380,000 -- or about $75,000 per ounce -- made with meat grown in a laboratory will be cooked and eaten in London next month, scientists say. The 5-ounce burger will include a patty of made of synthetic meat, grown in a laboratory from the stem cells of a slaughtered cow, the scientist behind the faux burger said. The costly patty, set for a public "proof of principle" consumption, will be made of about 3,000 strips of artificial beef, each the size of a rice grain, grown from bovine stem cells cultured in the laboratory, the Belfast Telegraph reported Monday. It is the result of years of research by Mark Post, a medical physiologist at Maastricht University in the Netherlands. Synthetic meat could help to save the world from the growing consumer demand for beef, lamb, pork and chicken, which could see the conversion of much of the world's remaining forests to barren, manicured pastures by the end of this century, Post said. Stem cells taken from just one animal could, in theory, be used to make a million times more meat than could be butchered from a single beef carcass. Post's research into synthetic meat, which ran up the $380,000 tab, has been funded by a wealthy anonymous backer who may reveal his identity publicly by volunteering to be the first to taste the test-tube burger, a source told the Telegraph. *-- Woman wants lions back, doesn't care for gnome --* RACINE, Wis. - A Wisconsin woman targeted by pranksters said she does not consider the gnome left by her door to be a fair trade for her missing lion statues. Liza Michna, 37, of Racine said she was at the hospital with her daughter, who was in a diabetic coma, about two weeks ago and returned home to find one of the lion statues that used to guard her front door was missing, The (Racine) Journal Times reported Monday. Michna said the second lion was taken two days later and replaced with a lawn gnome. Michna said the lions were a gift from her husband and five children on Mother's Day last year. "I love those things," she said. Michna said she won't press charges against the pranksters if the lions are returned unharmed. "They can have their gnome," she said. ========================================================= >-->From Our Friend Bunni :) .---. / \ | - - | (| ' ' |) | (_) | `//=\\' (((())) )))(( (()))) ))(( (() jgs )) ( >The Young Within When you see an old person hobbling along Don't frown and then turn away For inside that withered old body Dwells a heart that's still young and gay You may see hair that's turned silver And age-spotted wrinkled old skin But take a longer, deeper look To see the young person within A person who's known joy and happiness And perhaps has cried bitter tears Who has shared times of youthful laughter And knowledge that has come with the years So don't laugh at them with derision Reach out and take them by the hand. For someday when at last time has touched you You'll know the young inside and understand ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Growing old is something that touches most of us. As we grow older we tend to look back on all our years, sometimes with sadness and sometimes with happiness. But always remembering. Those memories are a part of our very essence. It is difficult for the young to realize the feelings we have inside and that though we look aged, we still have that young person inside our hearts. The one who still wants to run and play even though our aged bodies hold us back. For the young ones who do understand that, we can only say Thank You. --- ...So true! Thanks Bunni! -<>- _.-"""-. ." \ `". / .-"---._ \ |_/ _ _ `\_| / | o o | \ \/ 7 \/ \ .___. / '._ _ _.' jgs ) ( >Do Ya Wanna Box? Each day, when I would come home from work, I would drop to my knees and ask my four-year-old son if he wanted to box. I wanted him to learn how to protect himself. We would spar around for a few minutes before supper. One day, my wife and I took our son to get new shoes. The shoe salesman was friendly and allowed my son to try on several pairs of shoes before we decided on a particular pair that he liked. We asked if he wanted to wear them home and he replied, "Yes!" The salesman, who was kneeling on the floor in front of our son, held the old shoes in his hands and asked, "Do you want a box"? --- ...HaHA! Famous last words! Thanks Bunni! ========================================================= >-->From CleanLaffs: >Think you're a genius? .-"""""""-. .-""``"""-. .-"""""-. / _____/\_ \ / _______ \ / _____/\_\ / /`__ __ \ \ / /`__ __`\ \ //`__ __ \\ |/ (a) (a) \| \/ (o) (o) \/ // (e) (e) \\ (_ (___) _) (_ _ (___) _ _) (_ (_) _) \ \_____/ / \ \_ _/ / \ ,___ / `-._ _.-' `-._'-'_.-' `-._ _.-' __.-)_(-,__ __.-)_(-,__ __.-)_(-,__ ./'/ |_| \`\. ./'/ |_| \`\. ./'/ |_| \`\. / `""""""""""` \ jgs / `""""""""""` \ / `""""""""""` \ Take the below quiz. Passing requires 4 correct answers. 1) How long did the Hundred Years War last? 2) Which country makes Panama hats? 3) From which animal do we get cat-gut? 4) In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution? 5) What is a camel's hair brush made of? 6) The Canary Islands in the Pacific are named after what animal? 7) What was King George VI's first name? 8) What color is a purple finch? 9) Where are Chinese gooseberries from? All done, genius? Check your answers below. 1) How long did the Hundred Years War last? 116 years 2) Which country makes Panama hats? Ecuador 3) From which animal do we get cat gut? Sheep and Horses 4) In which month do Russians celebrate the October revolution? November 5) What is a camel's hair brush made of? Squirrel fur 6) The Canary Islands in the Pacific are named after what animal? Dogs 7) What was King George VI's first name? Albert. 8) What color is a purple finch? Crimson. 9) Where are Chinese gooseberries from? New Zealand. -<>- In one of K.C.'s classes, they were discussing the qualifications to be president of the United States. It was pretty simple - the candidate must be a natural born citizen of at least 35 years of age. However, one girl in the class immediately started in on how unfair was the requirement to be a natural born citizen. In short, her opinion was that this requirement prevented many capable individuals from becoming president. KC and the class were just taking it in and letting her rant, but everyone's jaw hit the floor when she wrapped up her argu- ment by stating, "What makes a natural born citizen any more qualified to lead this country than one born by C-section?" -<>- The father of a teenage daughter was concerned with the amount of time she spent on the telephone; not so much for the time she wasted (he had given up on that long ago), but because nobody else could use the phone. So, as a happy solution, he had a telephone installed for her with her own private number and directory listing. Two or three days after her telephone had been installed, he came home to find her stretched out on the floor with her feet on the living room couch and chatting away on the family telephone. Her own telephone was resting silently on her dresser. "Why are you using our telephone," he yelled. "Why aren't you talking on your own telephone?" "I can't," she said, "I'm expecting an important call on my phone." -<>- Out in space two alien forms are speaking with each other. The first spaceman says, "The dominant life forms on the earth planet have developed satellite-based weapons." The second alien, who looks exactly like the first, asks, "Are they an emerging intelligence?" The first spaceman says, "I don't think so...They have them aimed at themselves." -<>- A noted psychiatrist was a guest at an academic function, and his hostess naturally broached the subject in which the doctor was most at ease. "Would you mind telling me, Doctor," she asked, "how you detect a mental deficiency in somebody who appears completely normal?" "Nothing is easier," he replied. "You ask a simple question which anyone should answer with no trouble. If the person hesitates, that puts you on the track." "What sort of question?" "Well, you might ask him, 'Captain Cook made three trips around the world and died during one of them. Which one?'" The hostess thought a moment, then said with a nervous laugh, "You wouldn't happen to have another example would you? I must confess I don't know much about history." -<>- Curious when I found two black-and-white negatives in a drawer, I had them made into prints. I was pleasantly surprised to see that they were of a younger, slimmer me, taken on one of my first dates with my husband. When I showed him the photos, his face lit up. "Wow, look at that!" he said with appreciation. "It's my old Plymouth!" ========================================================= >-->From TheMouth: | / / / / / \ | / / / / / \ _ _ \ \ / \/ \ .-\ \o/\o/_ ( ( \ '- ,____/ | | | '--;-' Late Show Top Ten | __/ jgs | / / `--.`\ <__ '-'. `"""""``` >Top Ten Worst Summer Jobs 10. Octomom babysitter 9. Mel Gibson divorce lawyer 8. Assistant in charge of applying sunscreen to Rush Limbaugh 7. Susan Boyle groomer 6. Second assistant in charge of applying sunscreen to Rush Limbaugh 5. Dick Cheney hunting buddy (4th year on the list) 4. 'Jon & Kate Plus 8' marriage counselor 3. No number 3 - writer left to work for Conan 2. General Motors CEO 1. Proofreader for George W. Bush's memoir -<>- _.-"""""-._ .' '. / \ ## .--. .--. ## ##_ ___ ___ __## _ ##-// \\=// \\-## _ / \# \\_0// \\_0// #/ \ \( \ '-;' ';-' / )/ |) | | (| \_/| / \ |\_/ | \__.-.__/ | \ .==.==. / '. \`---`/ .' jgs `. `"""` .' '-...-' >BOSSES BASIC RULES Rule 1: The Boss is always right! Rule 2: In the impossible hypothesis that a subordinate may be right, Rule 1 becomes immediately operative. Rule 3: The boss does not sleep; he/she rests. Rule 4: The Boss is never late; he/she is delayed else- where. Rule 5: The Boss never leaves his/her work; his/her attention is required elsewhere. Rule 6: The Boss never reads the paper in his/her office; he/she studies. Rule 7: The Boss never takes advantage of his/her secretary with extra work. He/she educates her. Rule 8: The Boss is always chief, even in his/her bathing togs. Rule 9: Whomsoever may enter the boss's office with an idea of his own must leave the office with the boss's ideas. Rule 10: If, in your lamentable ignorance, you fail to grasp the truth, fear not; return to rule 1. -<>- ,/////\\, ,/////////\\\ ,///////////\\\\ //// __ _\\ /// // \ // \ /, \\_O/ \\_O/ \_ \ | \ ,__> / |\ ,____ / | \ \__| / REALLY? | '._____/ | | /``"--._ \/`\ jgs / \| /`--. /```""--..__;.' `\ >Real Signs In Shop Windows Signs In a clothing store: "Wonderful bargains for men with 16 and 17 necks." In the window of an Oregon general store: "Why go elsewhere to be cheated, when you can come here?" In a Pennsylvania cemetery: "Persons are prohibited from picking flowers from any but their own graves." On a Tennessee highway: "Take notice: when this sign is under water, this road is impassable." >From the safety information card in America WestAirline seat pocket: "If you are sitting in an exit row and can not read this card, please tell a crew member." On a Maine shop: "Our motto is to give our customers the lowest possible prices and workmanship." On a delicatessen wall: "Our best is none too good." ========================================================= >-->FUN Places To Net Visit :) Akiane Child Prodigy! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/prodigy.html Mouse Vs Leopard! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/mouse.html Last Day! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/lastday.html Friends And Health http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/friendhealth.html Greetings! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/greetings.html Love Test! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/lovetest.html Daily With The Troops 3! http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/daily3.htm Chapel With Bone Art! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/chapel.html Chalk Art 5! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/chalkart5.html Awesome Bikes! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/awesomebikes.html Beautiful Flowers! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/bflowers.html Celebrities Then And Now http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/celebrities.html -<>- >From Our Fiend LouiseA :) The 'N' Family! - Such a funny video! http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=-I7JJChM6IQ --- ...LMAO! Oh My! Only in America! Thanks LouiseA! -<>- >From Our Friend Linda :) Have you ever wondered why our great grandparents all had such fond memories of their youth? Well... I'm surprised they remembered anything at all !!! Forget Tums & Tylenol. Forget Aleve & Benedryl. Look at the cool stuff they had back then! She sent us one we have here... In Days Past! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/dayspast.html --- ...A shocker for sure! Thanks Linda! -<>- Back to the 50's cars! http://tinyurl.com/l2ynsm7 --- ...Wowsers! Thanks Linda! -<>- >From Our Friend Melody :) Jeanne's http://www.youtube.com/watch_popup?v=-YFRUSTiFUs#t=65 Supercook: recipe search by ingredients you have at home http://www.supercook.com/ Sleepy Man Banjo Boys - YouTube http://tinyurl.com/n2324zk ========================================================= >-->Quotes & Thunkers: "Facebook has a new feature that allows you to see what you were posting a year ago. You just log on to Facebook and click on the 'I'm wasting my life' button." -Conan O'Brien "It's rumored that AMC's show 'The Walking Dead' is adding a zombie baby to the cast for next season. That's right, a drooling, hungry creature that can't talk or listen to reason - most people just call that a baby." -Jimmy Fallon "Hawaii has a new service that they hope will reduce the homeless population. What they do is buy the homeless people a one-way ticket back home. If homeless people don't want to fly, they will pay for them to go home on a cruise. That is just what the cruise industry needs - 'Now with homeless people.'" -Jimmy Kimmel "The inventor of the world's first artificial test-tube hamburger said that 'It looks, feels, and hopefully tastes like meat.' He was immediately sued by Arby's for stealing their slogan." -Conan O'Brien "I think we look back at times past with fondness because we were younger. Life had not yet begun pecking away at our innocence like buzzards on fresh road kill." -Craig Ferguson "A woman in Britain said that her pet goldfish survived for seven hours in the open air outside of his tank, which is a world record for goldfish torture. In the fish world, that's known as 'airboarding.'" -Jimmy Fallon "There is a big movie opening today - 'Wolverine.' In the new movie, Wolverine goes to Japan. Over in Japan, they don't call him Wolverine, of course. They call him 'Big Fuzzy-Head Man.'" -Craig Ferguson "A new study found that kids have better relationships with their parents if they are friends with them on Facebook. That's good because if you're a kid who's friends with your parents on Facebook, chances are you're not really friends with anyone else." -Jimmy Fallon "In a speech about the economy, President Obama said we've all been distracted by phony scandals. It's time we started getting distracted by the phony recovery." -Jay Leno >Updated FUN STUFF URLS - Oh Yeah :) Shangy! ------------------------------------------------------------------------ http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/urls.html FUN URLS ------------------------------------------------------------------------ -->BECOMING A CHRISTIAN HOW TO BE A CHRISTIAN! ------------------------------------------------------------------------ -->FULL LENGTH - FREE On line AUDIO MP3 Christian Foundational Class http://www.truthortradition.com/modules.php?name=News&file=article&sid=61 NEW LIFE IN CHRIST! ------------------------------------------------------------------------ -->This is for all you who love food and DARE to make it at home Yep. You guessed it - Recipes. These are Tried and True, Yummy to the Tummy, good old fashioned home cooking recipes that are EASY to do :) Visit Shangy's Easy-Does-It Home Recipes: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/easy.html Home Recipes >Got A good Recipe? SHARE IT HERE: Share A Recipe ************************************************************************ >TO SUBSCRIBE: Visit Here This Weeks regular Shangy emails OR For the Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com ************************************************************************