Rattlesnakes, Tips And Obama Supports Trump... :) Shangy!
>Here are the details on our Yahoo ShangyFunList:
To Subscribe send a blank email to
ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
To UnSubscribe send a blank email to
ShangyFunList-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com
Group home page:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ShangyFunList
or Web Site:
http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/ShangyFunList.html
Group email address:
ShangyFunList@yahoogroups.com
or email me here:
bcrsystems@earthlink.net
================
*~* A REMINDER: PLEASE Send me sweet, interesting, funny,
inspiring, family type forwards ANY TIME here...
bcrsystems@earthlink.net
I Need them, Love them, Use them, and Share them! THANK YOU!!
AND For Facebook Users:
Please Friend Me / Like Me here...
http://tinyurl.com/cma6all
AND For Google Plus Users:
You can find me here... Shangy Bigham
https://plus.google.com/106648555948034085752/posts
AND Please Share This email with All Your Friends And Family!
^~^ May God SUPER BLESS You As You Do! THANK YOU! :)
-<>-
* NOTE: An easy way to adjust the size of print in email or
any page is to hold down the Ctrl tab while moving
the scroll button on the mouse.
You can also use the keyboard to change the font size in
your web browser or emails. Hold down the Ctrl key while
pressing the + key for larger text or the - key for
smaller text!
================
.a88a.
. a888888:..--.
\\\ 8888888:`\ \
\\\`Y888P' , \. \
=\\\_..' o/ . \ \
`c\`-' <\/| \. \
\ \ ( .'` )
\ \n .' ._/
a:f \__|).\ ._/
(--: .-)_/
`--'
>>> READER COMMENTS <<<
>From our EXTRA on July 24:
Clinton Chose Her VP
http://tinyurl.com/jctvemk
---
...I saw him on the news and heard them say he speaks Spanish to
the people being fluent in it as well as English.
This super offended and irritated me! I am tired of languages
being used to cater to those who live here who have not learned
English. OK for tourists but for voters? This is America not
Cuba, Puerto Rico, Spain or Mexico etc! I think it is fine if
you are speaking on C-Span or places such as that, but in the
general population, it is highly disrespectful to the American
people to be speaking a language to them other then English
during a campaign!
I also find it most offensive to be protesting in America, waving
the Mexican flag and burning or stomping on the American flag.
'America - Love it or Leave it' comes to mind!
Trump doesn't speak any foreign language but his son Barron
speaks Slovenian, English and French.
His wife, Melania, speaks Slovenian, English, French, Serbian
and German. McIver, wrote her speech that every one got up in
arms about, and also co-authored several books with Trump's
husband, said Mrs. Trump was inspired by Obama and read out
passages from her speech during a phone conversation. She then
included the phrases in a draft of the speech without checking
Obama's transcript.
Note: Biden's California speech had taken a phrase from the
1961 inaugural address of John F. Kennedy. But nobody got all
riled up about it.
The Trumps refused her offer to resign in the wake of the scandal.
"I am honoured to work for such a great family," she said.
'Although it's not surprising for a candidate's wife to back
her husband's policies, some were taken aback by Melania's
enthusiasm for Trump's tough rhetoric on migrants, having
immigrated to the US herself. "I follow the law," she told an
MSNBC interviewer. "I never thought to stay here without
papers." When pressed about her husband's questionable comments
on "criminals" crossing the border into the US, she was equally
unfazed. "I don't feel he insulted the Mexicans," she said. "He
said 'illegal immigrants.'"
So, how offended would their audience be if she started speaking
in German to folks Trump was speaking to in a part German
speaking area of America? Why should Spanish be any different?
English was her last language she learned. She wanted to be an
American so she learned it. As all who LIVE and WORK here should!
http://tinyurl.com/h58traj
/\
,'.'
','
_.,._ _,.-+`'+-._ .|.
_.+'` `.' \ (___)
,' \ \
\ \ \
\ \ \
\ \ \
\ \ \
\ \ \
\ \ \
\ \ \
\ _.-~`'~-._ _\_.-+'`'`+-._\
ag `,' `---`
>-->Our Friend Norma Sent us a response to this. She Wrote:
>My say about illegals
All these so called immigrants, I am so sorry to say they are NOT
immigrants, they are all ILLEGALS. My grandparents, parents, Uncle
and Aunt were all immigrants, not illegals. They all came to the
USA through Ellis Island with their proper paper work. None of
them spoke a word of English. My mother and aunt started school
not knowing a word of English, they had NO BILINGUAL, (which to me
is a bunch of crap, plus everything also written in their language).
How are they ever going to learn English? Just as soon as they all
knew our language they applied for citizenship, all were so
thrilled to become AMERICAN citizens. Now this to me is when you
can be called an immigrant, you're now a citizen and you immigrated
from another country. In those days too you either were able to
make it here in our country or you went back to your homeland. NO
assistance AT ALL, like all these ILLEGALS get today. All of my
entire family that came to the USA make successful lives for
themselves, followed all the LAWS and WAYS of life, paid their
taxes etc. until they all passed away. My grandparents, my mother,
aunt and uncle were legal immigrates from Italy, my father was a
legal immigrant from Switzerland. I was the first child born to my
LEGAL IMMIGRANT parents that were proudly LEGAL AMERICAN CITIZENS.
I get so furious and very upset when these ILLEGALS are called
immigrants, they are NOT IMMIGRANTS by NO means of the word they
are ALL ILLEGALS!!!!, once getting their American citizenship,
then they become immigrants and NOT BEFORE!!
---
...I am so touched by your sharing this with us Norma! Thank you!
Brings tears to my eyes and takes me back to when I did a report
on the Statue of Liberty when I was in grade school. My cover
page was a hand drawn and colored picture of the Statue of Liberty.
That report was perhaps my first understanding of how important
our country is. We are the land of the free and the home of the
brave because we are a nation of hope. A country of immigrants. And
as you so beautifully pointed out, we are a nation of LEGAL
IMMIGRANTS. Many worked hard and proudly took their oath of
citizenship and America gladly took them in and made them part of
this great nation. That is who we are. 'A great melting pot' of
diverse immigrants that had one thing in common. All wanted freedom
and a better life for themselves and their children. We can all
trace our family trees back to another country where our relatives
originated from because, unless we are Native Americans, we are all
Legal Immigrants to this country. As you so rightly pointed out,
anyone else is simply an ILLEGAL ALIEN and not an immigrant.
================
>-->3 HOT Off The 'Shangy' Press :)
Our first too hot to handle new page comes from our friends
MohB and Deci. This is one that renews your faith in mankind.
You'll be surprised at how at risk the hero put himself to
save this little helpless one! Be sure to check out this
heartwarming story.
. ..
. . .. .
. .. ... .
. .. .. .
. ...... .
. ...... .
........
........
.... 0..
.........
........ .
. @...) ....
.. ....
... .......
........................
.......................
.......................
........................
........ ..... .....
....... ..... .....
... ... .... ....
... ... ... ...
... ...... ...
... .:.. ...
... ...:.. ...
... ... .. ..
.. .. gfj/ejm
Fawn Rescue 2!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/fawnrescue2.html
---
...Does ones heart good to see this! Thanks my friends!
Our Next sizzling hot new page is from our friends Bunni and
LouiseAu. It is one that will tickle your funny bone. Animals
are such wonderful actors just doing what they do naturally!
Be sure to check out the video here too!
._ _
| \ / |
|__/ |\
.' / `.
/
/ (/)
_.-------------------._ ()
.-' `-. \
.' O `. `.___
.' O `. `.
/ o \ /
| . /| | J
L . .-'' ''\/| _ _ j |
| < ' |/.\ /.\ | |
| __ '--. |../\|...\ /...\ | `.
L \ / ' /.....\ /.....\ J \
| \__/ _/ | | | | | )
\ \__/ | O |-'-'-'-| O | / /
`. __ \ ___ | . _ . .' /
`. \__\/ \ | . / \ . .' / /
`-. |_ | . | |.-' .' (
`-.___\_____||^||_|/iwO (______)
(rediddle by VK)
Animals And Windows!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/animalsandwindows.html
---
...A hilarious one! Thanks Ladies!
Our last smoking hot page comes inspired by our friend Fran
and my brother Del. I've been thinking about this page and
what to do with it since it is getting outdated. I decided
with such a wonderful RNC convention that it was time for
me to update it. Check it and the videos on it out here:
_____
/ \/_
//\__(\_\
|\ ^ ^ |
.//_O \O_ \
\_ (_) /
\ \_/ /
__/\ /\__
/ \ \ / / \
/ \/\/\/ \
/ | . | \
/ | . | \ JRO
Why Trump 2!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/whytrump2.html
---
...Thank you Fran and Del! Wonderful!
=======================================================
>-->From SmileZilla:
__
(`/\
`=\/\ __...--~~~~~-._ _.-~~~~~--...__
`=\/\ \ / \\
`=\/ V \\
//_\___--~~~~~~-._ | _.-~~~~~~--...__\\
// ) (..----~~~~._\ | /_.~~~~----.....__\\
===( INK )==========\\|//====================
__ejm\___/________dwb`---`______________________________________
When you write copy you have the right to copyright the copy you
write, if the copy is right. If however, your copy falls over,
you must right your copy. If you write religious services you
write rite, and have the right to copyright the rite you write.
Very conservative people write right copy, and have the right to
copyright the right copy they write. A right wing cleric would
write right rite, and has the right to copyright the right rite
he has the right to write. His editor has the job of making the
right rite copy right before the copyright can be right.
Should Jim Wright decide to write right rite, then Wright would
write right rite, which Wright has the right to copyright.
Duplicating that rite would copy Wright right rite, and violate
copyright, which Wright would have the right to right.
Right?
=======================================================
+------------ BIZARRE HOLIDAYS ------------+
July 25 is Culinarians Day and Threading the Needle Day
July 26 is All or Nothing Day and Aunt and Uncle Day
July 27 is Take Your Pants for a Walk Day
July 28 is National Milk Chocolate Day
July 29 is National Lasagna Day
July 30 is National Cheesecake Day, Father-in-Law Day and
International Day of Friendship
July 31 is Mutt's Day and System Administrator Appreciation Day
=======================================================
>-->From GoodCleanFun:
_.--....
_....---;:'::' ^__/
.' `'`___....---=-'`
/::' (`
\' `:.
`\::. ';-"":::-._ {}
_.--'`\:' .'`-.`'`.' `{I}
.-' `' .;;`\::. '. _: {-I}`\
.' .:. `:: _)::: _;' `{=I}.:|
/. ::::`":::` ':'.-'`':. {_I}::/
|:. ':' ::::: .':'`:. `'|':|:'
\: .:. ''' .:| .:, _:./':.|
jgs '--.:::...---'\:'.:`':`':./
'-::..:::-'
>Rattlesnakes
My husband was playing golf with our town's fire chief when he hit
a ball into the rough. As he headed for the brush to find his ball,
the chief warned him, "Be careful, the rattlesnakes are out."
The chief explained that calls had been coming in all week
requesting assistance with removing the snakes.
"You've got to be kidding," my husband replied in astonishment.
"People actually call the fire department to help them with
rattlesnakes? What do you say to them?"
"Well," said the chief, "the first thing I ask is, 'Is it on fire?'"
-<>-
>Collectibles
Fresh out of high school, I found a job cleaning the elegant home
of an older couple. Among other duties, I had to dust their many
imported carvings and petrified collectibles as well as pick up
after their pets.
One day I was astonished to find two ivory fossils lying on the
floor beside the bookcase. I quickly picked them up and put them
back on the shelf. The next week the same thing happened.
That afternoon my employer came into the parlor, her faithful
canine behind her. Looking around, she eyed the bookcase.
"Tippy," she asked the dog, "how do your bones keep getting up
there?"
-<>-
>Big Pill
I went to the doctor with a badly swollen leg. After a careful
examination, the doctor gave me a pill big enough to choke a
horse. Then he said, "I'll be right back with some water."
Well, the doctor was gone quite a while and I lost my patience. I
hobbled out to the drinking fountain, forced the pill down my
throat and gobbled down water until the pill got all the way down.
Then I hobbled back into the examining room.
Just then the doctor came back with a bucket of warm water. "Okay,
after the tablet dissolves, soak that leg for at least 30 minutes."
-<>-
>Two-Dollar Bills
When the U.S. Mint reissued two-dollar bills, I thought they might
someday become collectors' items. I went to the bank and picked up
a hundred, serially numbered and still in their original band.
On my next trip to my parents' house, I gave the $200 to my mother
and said, "Take good care of these. They might be worth something
someday."
Several months later I asked Mom if she was keeping the two dollar
bills safe. "Oh, yes!" she replied. "I deposited them in the bank
the day after you left."
=========================================================
>-->From Our Friend LouiseA :)
____
___|=--=/
\=--=| :(___.--.
.--.___): { __ ' )
( ` __ )= ""----'Ahas
'----"" ===='
>SMILES
A tourist driving through Little Rock, Arkansas. passes a young
boy walking along wearing only one shoe. The tourist stops his
car and asks the boy, "Did you lose a shoe?"
"Nope," the boy replies. "Found one."
--------
A woman goes to the police station to report that her husband
was missing.
"Can you give me a detailed description of him?" asked the
officer.
"He's short and bald, skinny and wrinkled and wears dentures,"
answered the wife. "Come to think of it, most of him was
missing before HE was."
--------
Everyone farts, admit it or not. Kings fart, queens fart. Edward
Lear, the 19th century English landscape painter, wrote
affectionately of a favorite Duchess who gave enormous dinner
parties attended by the cream of society.
One night she let out a ripper and quick as a flash she turned her
gaze to her stoic butler, standing, as always, behind her.
"Hawkins!" she cried, "Stop that!"
"Certainly, your Grace", he replied with unhurried dignity, "Which
way did it go?"
--------
Because our former small-town parish was not a wealthy one, our
pastor was dependent on parishioners for upkeep and maintenance
of the church.
Once he asked my husband, Sam, to rewire the confessionals.
The only way to reach the wiring was to enter the attic above the
altar and crawl over the ceiling by balancing on the rafters.
Concerned for my husband's safety, I waited in a pew.
Unbeknownst to me, some parishioners were congregating in the
vestibule.
They paid little attention to me, probably assuming I was praying.
Worried about my husband, I looked up toward the ceiling and yelled,
"Sam, Sam -- are you up there? Did you make it okay?"
There was quite an outburst from the vestibule when Sam's hearty
voice echoed down, "Yes, I made it up here just fine!"
--------
When April and I went up to New England a couple of years ago we
decided to stay in one of those quaint little inns.
The clerk at the inn asked me if we wanted a room with a shower
or a tub.
"What's the difference?" I asked, wondering if the room with a
tub cost more than the one with just the shower.
"Well, sir, in a tub, you can sit down...." the clerk answered.
-------
A wealthy old man looked around the table at his two sons and
five daughters and their spouses gathered for Christmas dinner.
"Not a single grandchild," he said with a sigh. "Why, I'll give
a million dollars to the first kid who presents me with a little
one to bounce on my knee. Now, let's say grace."
When the old man lifted his eyes again, his wife was the only
other person at the table.
--------
A grandfather bought a hobby horse by mail order as a birthday
present for his granddaughter. The toy arrived in 189 pieces. The
instructions said that it could be put together in an hour.
However it took the old man two days to assemble the toy.
Finally, when it was all put together, he wrote a check, cut it
into 189 pieces and mailed it off to the company.
--------
One day, a father was reading his paper, when his son came in and
said, "Dad, will you take me to the zoo tomorrow?"
"No," said his father, "If they want you, they can come and get
you."
--------
A minister dies and is waiting in line at the Pearly Gates. Ahead
of him is a guy who's dressed in sunglasses, a loud shirt, leather
jacket, and jeans.
Saint Peter addresses this guy, "Who are you, so that I may know
whether or not to admit you to the Kingdom of Heaven?"
The guy replies, "I'm Joe Cohen, taxi-driver, of Noo Yawk City."
Saint Peter consults his list. He smiles and says to the taxi-
driver, "Take this silken robe and golden staff and enter the
Kingdom of Heaven."
The taxi-driver goes into Heaven with his robe and staff, and
it's the minister's turn. He stands erect and booms out, "I am
Joseph Snow, pastor of Saint Mary's for the last forty-three
years."
Saint Peter consults his list. He says to the minister, "Take
this cotton robe and wooden staff and enter the Kingdom of Heaven."
"Just a minute," says the minister. "That man was a taxi-driver
and he gets a silken robe and golden staff. How can this be?"
"Up here, we work by results," says Saint Peter. "While you
preached, people slept; while he drove, people prayed."
---
...LOL! Thanks LouiseAu!
-<>-
________
_jgN########Ngg_
_N##N@@"" ""9NN##Np_
d###P N####p
"^^" T####
d###P
_g###@F
_gN##@P
gN###F"
d###F
0###F
0###F
0###F
"NN@'
___
q###r
""
>Ponderisms
I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most
people die of natural causes.
Can you cry under water?
How important does a person have to be before they are considered
assassinated instead of just murdered?
Why do you have to "put your two cents in"...but it's only a "penny
for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going? (taxes)
Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you
were buried in for eternity?
Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
What disease did cured ham actually have?
How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it
would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies
wake up like every two hours?
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in
binoculars to look at things on the ground?
Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to
see you naked anyway.
Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a
horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a
coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours?
They're both dogs!
If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why
didn't he just buy dinner?
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from
vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from
morons?
Why Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the
same tune?
Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the ATMOSPHERE,
but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets
mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his
head out the window?
IF YOU GO TO HEAVEN AND HAVE WINGS, WHAT IF YOU ARE SCARED OF HEIGHTS?
---
...HaHa! Does make ya wonder! Thanks LouiseAu!
=========================================================
>-->From Our Friend Fran :)
>Tips:
b.
88b
888b.
88888b
888888b.
8888P"
P" `8.
`8. cgmm
`8
Coconut oil is known for having tons of health benefits which is
why it is a popular choice for cooking at high temperatures, such
as for searing, frying or baking. Outside of cooking, coconut oil
can be used in numerous ways to including to improve beauty or
help clean. Here are great DIY ways to use coconut oil in your
home.
Get Beach Wave Hair: In a spray bottle mix 1 cups of hot water
with 1 tsp. of sea salt, 1 tsp. of coconut oil and 1 tsp of hair
gel to get a homemade spray to give your hair beautiful beach wave
hair.
Treat Cold Sores: Dab a bit of coconut oil directly onto cold
sores to speed up healing times, and help prevent the virus’s
ability to reproduce.
>Puter Tip: 5 Things You Can Do With Your Smartphone
b.
88b
888b.
88888b
888888b.
8888P"
P" `8.
`8. cgmm
`8
It feels like smartphones can do pretty much anything these days.
Of course, most people will simply use their mobile devices to
text friends, browse the internet, and check their various social
media accounts. There are, however, a vast array of other
possibilities out there for those who really want to see what
their phones are capable of doing. If anything, the smartphone
can become a central hub of control for many different applications
and functions. Anyone who doesn’t know about this isn’t taking full
advantage of all that their smartphones have to offer. So check out
just a sampling of some of the things you can do and control from
today’s mobile devices.
Monitor Health
Wearable technology is one of the fastest growing industries in the
world. If you’ve seen a Fitbit, for example, then you get an idea
of what they’re capable of.
Smartphones can utilize this technology too, making wearables more
accessible and easy-to-use. Apps that are downloadable for your
smartphone can connect to other wearable devices dedicated to
monitoring your health. These wearables can have many functions,
from monitoring your blood pressure to recording your temperature.
All this data can be collected and stored, and if something looks
like it falls outside of the normal parameters, local health
officials can be alerted as well.
Start Car Engines
It can be quite the unpleasant experience to wake up in the middle
of winter, go to your car, and drive to work while your car slowly
warms up. Luckily with car apps like the Viper SmartStart, you can
start your car’s engine remotely, allowing the vehicle to warm up
before you ever step foot outside your door.
The app does require the SmartStart to be installed in your car,
but once that’s done, you can start the engine with just a press
of a button from your smartphone. The app also allows you to
perform other functions, like locking the doors or opening the
trunk.
Perform Car Diagnostics
Similar to starting a car’s engine, other devices can give your
smartphone even more capabilities. Modern automobiles come with a
computer unit that basically monitors all the car’s systems. After
plugging a device into that central computer, users can download
an app that will give them data about their car’s on-board
diagnostics. In this way, you can check on your car without having
to get into its systems, making sure that everything is running
smoothly. You can even receive alerts in case anything needs to be
repaired before things get out of hand.
Create Mobile Hotspots
This is a feature already available on smartphones that doesn’t
require downloading an app. With your smartphone, you can use your
carrier’s network to create a mobile hotspotfor Wi-Fi, allowing you
to connect other devices like tablets and laptops to the internet.
This is especially useful if you find yourself on the road a lot
and can’t locate a good local Wi-Fi network to connect to. Each
smartphone has different ways of creating a hotspot, so check
online for how to make it happen with your particular device. You
need to be careful with this though, because creating mobile
hotspots at work may compromise youremployer’s IT security.
Change Light Bulb Settings
While it may seem like a little thing, being able to change the
settings of your home's light bulbs represents something much
larger–mainly controlling items throughout your home from your
smartphone (usually called having a smart home). In the case of
light bulbs, an app available from Phillips allows you to change
the color and intensity of the lights within your home.
This can also be done remotely, giving you the power to do so even
if you’re far away from the house. In other smart home technology,
users can also control their thermostats, garage doors, locks, and
other household appliances, all with the ease of using a smartphone,
---
...Awesome tips! Thanks Fran!
=======================================================
>-->In The Worldly News:
[Politics]
>From Our Friend Geniann :)
Do you smell a rat?
http://tinyurl.com/j3jcdxh
---
...YEPPERS! I sure do! Way too many coincidences! Thanks Geniann!
-<>-
>From Christianity Today:
Endorsing Trump
http://tinyurl.com/zvdmawl
-<>-
>AmericanActionNews:
Obama Supports Trump!
b.
88b
888b.
88888b
888888b.
8888P"
P" `8.
`8. cgmm
`8
http://americanactionnews.com/articles/breaking-obama-supports-trump
On Cruz
http://tinyurl.com/gs8krjt
-<>-
>From BizarreNews:
A TSA agent was arrested on a charge of voyeurism after
allegedly recording up the skirt of a woman on an airport
escalator, according to police in Washington.
The Seattle Police Department said that they have arrested
29-year-old Nicholas Fernandez, after being seen using a
phone to record a video up the skirt of a woman who was
riding on an escalator.
Fernandez was charged with one count of voyeurism. He was
booked into jail, and his bail was set at $7,500. Fernandez
has been removed from screening duties, and he has been
suspended without pay.
According to the police, an investigation was launched
after a man spotted the TSA agent recording a video up the
skirt of a woman.
The man called the police, and officers began watching
Fernandez at the Seattle Tacoma International Airport.
An officer saw Fernandez taking a break from a checkpoint
around 11:30 a.m.
He then followed a woman up an escalator, where he activated
a cellphone flashlight and appeared to be taking a video of
the woman.
-<>-
A man told his aunt that he stole a human brain in order to
use it to produce strong marijuana that causes
hallucinations, according to police in Pennsylvania.
Carlisle police said that they have arrested 26-year-old
Joshua Long, after being accused of conspiring with his
friends to produce potent marijuana using the stolen human
brain.
Not sure how that would work, but you can't argue with
science.
Long was charged with abuse of a corpse and conspiracy to
commit abuse of a corpse. He was booked into the Cumberland
County Prison, and his bail was set at $100,000.
Police are still looking for Long's accomplices.
According to the police investigation, Long's aunt
discovered the human brain in a WalMart shopping bag under
the porch of a mobile home belonging to his friend.
When the aunt asked Long about the brain, he admitted that
he and Zoller use it to produce strong marijuana. Police
believe that the brain was used as a specimen for teaching.
*-------- When Dinner Comes to Your Door --------*
Residents of a Baltimore apartment complex received a visit
from a pair of bulls that escaped from a local slaughterhouse
on Friday morning. The bulls escaped from the Old Line Custom
Meat Company and found their way into the parking lot of a
nearby apartment complex around 7 a.m. Baltimore police
arrived on the scene and used portable gates along with the
complex's "natural barriers" to temporarily trap the bulls.
"They were able to get some fencing over here to fence them
in and we had them contained," Baltimore Police spokesman
reported. "However, the bulls knocked over the fencing a
couple of times, so we had to move people back." The bulls
were finally captured by about 10:30 a.m., before temperatures
reached nearly 100 degrees. No one was hurt in the incident.
*---- It Seemed Like a Good Idea at the Time ----*
Authorities in Missouri arrested a man and a woman accused
of taking a naked ride on a stolen lawn mower in the early
morning. The Jasper County Sheriff's Office said deputies
made contact with a 55-year-old man and a 40-year-old woman
inside the house. The couple told deputies they had been
skinny dipping in a creek earlier that morning and they rode
the lawn mower home in the nude after their clothes were
stolen. Deputies said the couple were arrested on suspicion
of stealing when deputies determined the lawn mower didn't
belong to either of them. The sheriff's office said theft
charges are being pursued by the Jasper County prosecutor's
office.
*---------- "So, what are you in for?" ----------*
RIO DE JANEIRO - Here is a criminal charge you don't hear
very often. A man armed with a fire extinguisher attempted
to put out the Olympic flame, the second time someone tried
to douse the flame on its trip to the 2016 Summer Games.
Video shows a man running from the crowd as the torch
bearers passed through Joinville and attempting
unsuccessfully to spray the flame with a fire extinguisher
before being apprehended by security. According to Fox
Sports, the man's motivations were unknown but he was
arrested for attempting to put out the flame symbolizing
the spirit of the competition at the games. A similar filed
attempt at extinguishing the Olympic flame was made in June
when a 27-year-old man acting on a dare flung a bucket of
water at the torch, but missed and doused security guards.
=========================================================
>-->From CleanLaffs:
,-. Life keeps rolling along......
( O )` ~ - . _ . - ~ ` ~ - . _ . - ~ ` ~ -
|`-'| : : : : : : : :
| | : : : : : : : :
`-'` ~ - . _'. - ~ ` ~ - .'_ . - ~ ` ~ -
cww
As the lone female in our house, I find that certain male
habits have really begun to get on my nerves. One day, I
emerged from the bathroom completely exasperated when I
bumped into my husband.
"What is it with guys that they won't replace the toilet
paper?!" I raged.
"I know," he said, nodding in agreement. "I noticed that
when I was in there earlier."
-<>-
A man picks up his golf-indifferent girlfriend after he has
come from the links. While he's driving the tees in his
pocket fall out. His girlfriend asks, "Harry, what are those
things that just fell out of your pockets?"
"Oh, those are called tees. I put my balls on them when I'm
driving."
"Oh, well. Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer."
-<>-
According to a news report, a certain private school in
Washington was recently faced with a unique problem. A
number of 12-year-old girls were beginning to use lipstick
and would put it on in the Bathroom. That was fine, but
after they put on their lipstick they would press their
lips to the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints.
Every night the maintenance man would remove them and the
next day the girls would put them back. Finally the
principal decided that something had to be done.
She called all the girls to the bathroom and met them there
with the maintenance man. She explained that all these lip
prints were causing a major problem for the custodian who
had to clean the mirrors every night (you can just imagine
the yawns from the little princesses).
To demonstrate how difficult it had been to clean the
mirrors, she asked the maintenance man to show the girls how
much effort was required.
He took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it in the toilet,
and cleaned the mirror with it.
Since then, there have been no lip prints on the mirror.
-<>-
I was traveling through Georgia last summer and stopped at a
little backwoods country store. In the men's room there was
a handwritten sign above the malfunctioning potty which said,
"Please Wiggel Handel".
Below that some wit had written, "If I do, will it wiggel
Bach?"
-<>-
In order to make the world a better place, the following
rules will take immediate effect across the planet.
1. It is no longer permitted to be stupid and slow. You
must choose one or the other.
2. If in the course of parking your car you are not able
to maneuver the vehicle into a space in less time than it
takes to undergo and recover from open heart surgery, it
is not permitted to park in that space.
3. If you are waiting for an elevator that is slow to come
and you are the sort of person who pushes the call button
repeatedly in the belief that it will make a difference,
you are no longer permitted to use elevators.
4. Boxes of Christmas cards that carry messages like "May
your holidays be wrapped in warmth and touched with wonder"
must bear a label on the outside of the box saying: "Do Not
Purchase - Message Inside Is Embarrassing and Sentimental."
5. In office buildings and retail premises in which entry
is through double doors and one of those doors is locked
for no reason, the door must bear a large sign saying:
"This Door Is Locked for No Reason."
6. Liver and goat cheese will no longer be regarded as
foods. In fancy restaurants, salads may no longer contain
anything that can be found growing at the side of any
public highway.
7. When standing in line at a retail establishment, it is
not permitted to engage the sales assistant in conversation
regarding the weather, the health or personal relationships
of mutual acquaintances or other matters not relevant to
the purchase.
7a. Anyone who reaches the front of a line and says, "Now
what do I want?" and purses his lips thoughtfully or drums
his fingers on his chin while studying the ordering options
as if for the first time will be taken outside and shot.
8. Any electronic clock on which the time is set by holding
down a button and scrolling laboriously through the minutes
and hours is illegal. Also, when you are trying to set the
alarm for, say, 7:00 a.m. and the numbers get to about 6:52
and then suddenly speed up and you discover that you have
gone past the desired hour and have to start all over, that
is extremely illegal.
9. All Americans will appreciate irony. Britons will under-
stand that two ice cubes in a drink is not nearly enough.
[This list was written by Bill Bryson in his book I'M A
STRANGER HERE MYSELF. The original list contained several
other items, but that would have made it too long for
publication here, and to tell you the truth the other items
weren't really that funny anyway.]
-<>-
>SOMETIMES...
Sometimes...
when you cry,
no one sees your tears.
Sometimes...
when you are in pain,
no one sees your hurt.
Sometimes...
when you are worried,
no one sees your stress.
Sometimes...
when you are happy,
no one sees your smile.
.
z$$$$$e.
.$$$$$$$$$c -r d
$$$$$$$$$$$. *c. 'L
4$$$$$$$$$$$F 4c "*e. "%c
^$$$$$$$$$$$F "b ^b "*
*$$$$$$$$$$ .. P $ J"
^*$$$$$$$$\e$$$e. d" .F z"
"*$$$P".$$$$$$$c d% J" .d" .P
$$$$$$$$$$e. $ P z*" .d"
$$$$$$$$$$$$b. ^*ee... " zP"
"*$$$$$$$$$$$$$ee.. ^""* .d"
.$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$eee......eeedec. e* .ze
z$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$b. .P" .z@*"
z$$$$$""*$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$c ^ eP""
d$$$$$" "*$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ "
.d$$$$P" ^"*$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ ****$eee
.$$$$$* ^"$$$$$$$$$$*$$$$$$$$$$$" ec.
.z$$$$$" "*$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$*" ""**ec.
.zed$$$$$$$" "*$$$$$$$$$$*" ""
.d$$$$$$$P"
.d$$$$$$$*"
z$$$$$$$$"
.$$$$$$$*"
d$$$$$*"
z$$$$"
.$$$$$ Gilo94'
But fart just ONE TIME!
=========================================================
>-->From TheMouth:
.-.
_.--"""".o/ .-.-._
__' ."""; { _J ,__ `.
; o\.-.`._.'J; ; / `- / ;
`--i`". `" .'; `._ __.' |
\ `""" \ `; :
`."-. ; ____/ /
`-.` `-.-' `"-..'
___ `;__.-'" `.
.-{_ `--._ /.-" `-.
/ ""T ""---...' _.-"" """-. `.
; / __.-"". `. `, _..
\ / __.-"" '. \ `.,__ .'L' }
`---"`-.__ __." .-. j `. : `. .' ,' /
"""" / \ : `. | F' \ ;
; `-._,L_,-""-. `-, ; ` ; /
`. 7 `-._ `.__/_ \/
\ _; \ _.' `-. /
`---" `.___,, ;"" \ .'
_/ ; `"
.-" _,-'
{ "";
;-.____.'`.
fsc `. \ '. :
\ : : /
`':/ `
>Things you would never know without the Movies
[Edited]
- During all police investigations, it will be necessary
to visit a strip club at least once.
- If being chased through town, you can usually take cover
in a passing parade or festival - at any time of year.
- The Chief of Police will almost always suspend the star
detective - or give them 48 hours to finish the job.
- The Chief of Police will almost always be a woman or a
person of color.
- All grocery bags contain at least one stick of French
Bread.
- The ventilation system of any building is the perfect
hiding place - no one will ever think of looking for you in
there and you can travel to any other part of the building
undetected.
- The Eiffel Tower can be seen from any window in Paris.
- If you need to reload your gun, you will always have more
ammunition, even if you haven't been carrying any before
now.
- If your town is threatened by an imminent natural disaster
or killer beast, the mayor's first concern will be the
tourist trade or his forthcoming art exhibition.
- When paying for a taxi, don't look at your wallet as you
take out a bill; just grab one at random and hand it over.
It will always be the exact fare.
- Kitchens don't have light switches. When entering a
kitchen at night, you should open the fridge door and use
that light instead.
- If staying in a haunted house, women should investigate
any strange noises in their most revealing underwear.
- Mothers routinely cook eggs, bacon and waffles for their
family every morning even though their husband and
children never have time to eat it.
=========================================================
>-->FUN Places To Net Visit :)
Police Dogs!-
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/policedogs.html
Pet Helpers!-
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/pethelpers.html
Bizarre Nature 2!-
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/bizarrenature2.html
Nanny Animals 3!-
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/nannyanimals3.html
Animal Friends 5!-
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/animalfriends5.html
Awww Animals 10!-
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/animals10.html
Big Baby Big Dogs 2!-
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/bigdogs2.html
Look Who's Talking 9!-
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/talking9.html
Amazing Albino Animals!-
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/albino.html
Adorable Baby Elephants!-
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/babyelephants.html
Hand-Sized Baby Animals!-
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/babyanimals2.html
Kisses Sweeter Than Honey!-
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/kisses.html
Sweet Animals With Flowers!-
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/animalswithflowers.html
-<>-
>Please Visit This Link to Get New Traffic For Shangrala :)
Fun Pages
http://www.funpageexchange.com/go.php?uid=3559
-<>-
>From Our Friend LouiseAu :)
26 magic tricks you don't want to miss. This magician has some
really great tricks up his sleeve.....literally.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6xcSsPFWXb4
---
...Sweet! Thanks LouuiseAu!
-<>-
>From Our Friend PatDeE :)
Some Funny Stuff - Boys!
http://tinyurl.com/qx7pmpt
---
...Oh My! HaHa! Thanks PatDeE!
-<>-
>From Our Friend Linda :)
Jaguar Fishing
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NCIP--MsqnM
This is amazing … you have not seen a dolphin show like this one
https://www.youtube-nocookie.com/embed/pRFq7K4vCSk?rel=0
---
...Wowsers! Love dolphins! Thanks Linda!
Ride a bike?
http://viewpure.com/MFzDaBzBlL0?ref=bkmk
Weightlifting Video
http://tinyurl.com/goy99j5
---
...Oh Yeah Linda! I can see us there! TeeHee!
=======================================================
>-->Quotes & Thunkers:
"Donald Trump Jr. spoke at the Republican Convention and
said his dad was his best friend, which is sweet and a
little sad. I was imagining if my dad was running for
president, and I thought about it for a long time. I think
my speech would say, 'My dad taught me the most important
thing - when someone offers you his finger and asks you to
pull it, don't. Nothing good comes of it.'" -Jimmy Kimmel
"A 91-year-old woman in Germany is under investigation for
destruction of property after she tried filling in words
on a crossword puzzle on display at an art museum. If
charged, the woman could face time in a four-letter word
for enclosure." -Seth Meyers
"Scientists have discovered that men are genetically
programed to look at other women. So sorry, ladies, it's
science. I've got to do what I've got to do." -Conan O'Brien
"A math blogger says he's figured out 'the world's favorite
number.' It turns out that it's 7. The least popular
number? The fake phone number you get when you tell a girl
you're a math blogger." -Jimmy Fallon
"A 94-year-old man from Indiana just became the oldest
person to get a six degree black belt in taekwondo. While
nobody has the heart to tell him the wooden board he
chopped through was just a graham cracker." -Jimmy Fallon
"The game Pokemon Go is actually making people visit
remote, potentially dangerous areas. On the bright side,
they finally found a way to get people to attend the Rio
Olympics." -Conan O'Brien
"At my age I do what Mark Twain did. I get my daily paper,
look at the obituaries page and if I'm not there I carry on
as usual."
-Patrick Moore
"In Florida, a woman who's a special needs teacher by day,
has been arrested for working as a prostitute at night.
When asked about it, the woman said her clients at night
also have "special needs."
-Conan O'Brien
"The trouble with heart disease is that the first symptom is
often hard to deal with - sudden death."
-Michael Phelps
>Updated FUN STUFF URLS - Oh Yeah :) Shangy!
------------------------------------------------------------------------
http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/urls.html
FUN URLS
------------------------------------------------------------------------
-->FULL LENGTH - FREE On line AUDIO MP3 Christian Foundational Class
http://www.truthortradition.com/modules.php?name=News&file=article&sid=61
NEW LIFE IN CHRIST!
------------------------------------------------------------------------
-->This is for all you who love food and DARE to make it at home Yep.
You guessed it - Recipes. These are Tried and True, Yummy to the Tummy,
good old fashioned home cooking recipes that are EASY to do :)
Visit Shangy's Easy-Does-It Home Recipes:
http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/easy.html
Home Recipes
>Got A good Recipe? SHARE IT HERE:
Share
A Recipe
************************************************************************
>TO SUBSCRIBE:
Visit Here
This Weeks regular Shangy emails
OR
For the Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to
ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
************************************************************************