Smiles For Thanksgiving ... :) Shangy! >Here are the details on our Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com To UnSubscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com Group home page: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ShangyFunList or Web Site: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/ShangyFunList.html Group email address: ShangyFunList@yahoogroups.com or email me here: bcrsystems@earthlink.net ================ *~* A REMINDER: PLEASE Send me sweet, interesting, funny, inspiring, family type forwards ANY TIME here... bcrsystems@earthlink.net I Need them, Love them, Use them, and Share them! THANK YOU!! AND For Facebook Users: Please Friend Me / Like Me here... http://tinyurl.com/cma6all AND For Google Plus Users: You can find me here... Shangy Bigham https://plus.google.com/106648555948034085752/posts AND Please Share This email with All Your Friends And Family! ^~^ May God SUPER BLESS You As You Do! THANK YOU! :) -<>- * NOTE: An easy way to adjust the size of print in email or any page is to hold down the Ctrl tab while moving the scroll button on the mouse. You can also use the keyboard to change the font size in your web browser or emails. Hold down the Ctrl key while pressing the + key for larger text or the - key for smaller text! ================ |_| _, _ _ ___ | |(_||_)|_)\_| .'=:-\ ___ | | ._| /.='( ` | |_ _ ,_ |/ , _ . .,_ _ /. ^=.'-._..---. | | |(_|| ||\/_)(_|||/|| |(_| | =^.'=.'^//"(_`\\)8, ._| ._| |^.'=' .=||/' `\||;8.-' \'.^,=^'.||; ; ||8/:_,_ give thanks... './-`\= \\\.-./;//,_/`- \ jgs \__/-/'-\888::((()),_ /:. .O__/ (_88:::(())):. `8':. ' *~* For Those Celebrating An Early Thanksgiving... Many will have early Thanksgiving Celebrations so here we have some Great Thanks Living Bible Teachings From our friends at www.TruthOrTradition.com: 1 of 2 Thanks: The Joy of Thanksgiving https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lifogbJpowo 2 of 2 Thanks: The Benefits of Thanks Living https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XRJVZ3wN2FU A Key to Being Thankful: You Can Never Go Back, Don't Live in the Past, Be Present Minded https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fJt78NfS69E --- ...I Thank God For ALL Of You! Blessings My Sweet Friends! :) -<>- >-->4 HOT Off The 'Shangy' Press :) Our first too hot to handle pages come from our friends LouiseAu and PatDeE. These photographers out did themselves. They give us a beautifully stunning look at the wild side of nature. Check these out here... Incredible Wildlife Photos! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/wildlife.html Incredible Wildlife Photos 2! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/wildlife2.html --- ...Simply mesmerizing! Thanks my friends! Our next red hot sizzler is from our friend Linda. This will give you some grins and chuckles with your Thanksgiving celebration. Turn up your sound and check this one out here... Maxine Thanksgiving! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/maxinethanksgiving.html --- ...Teehee! Hard to get enough of her witty humor! Thanks Linda! Last but certainly not least, our friend Bunni sent us a new recipe that looks so yummy, I'll be letting my three young grandsons help me with the baking and frosting of these. Check out this delight here under Desserts... Pumpkin Cookies W/Cream Cheese Frosting http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/easy.html --- ...These should be as fun to make as to eat! Thanks Bunni! ======================================================= >-->From TheFunnyBone: Mud Baths At The Spa .-""""""-. A guy goes to the doctor and the doctor .' '. tells him, "I have some very bad news / O O \ for you. I'm afraid that you're afflicted : ` : with a fatal and incurable disease." | | So the guy asks, "Well isn't there ANYTHING : .------. : I can do, doc?" \ ' ' / '. .' "Hmmm.... maybe you should go to a spa and jgs '-......-' start taking daily mud baths." The doctor tells the patient. "Mud baths? Will that help me, doc?" "Probably not.... But at least you'll get used to being covered in dirt!" _ _ (_'-----------------------------------------------'_) (_.===============================================._) Writings on Hospital Charts Actual writings on hospital charts ("Actual"? Mmmm...) She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year On the second day the knee was better and on the third day it disappeared The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993 Discharge status: Alive but without my permission Healthy appearing decrepit 68 year old male, mentally alert but forgetful The patient refused autopsy The patient has no previous history of suicides Patient has left white blood cells at another hospital Patient's medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only a 40 pound weight gain in the last 3 days Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch She is numb from her toes down While in ER, she was examined, x-rated and sent home The skin was moist and dry Occasional,constant infrequent headaches Patient was alert and unresponsive Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life, until she got a divorce I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical therapy Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation Examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized The lab test indicated abnormal lover function The patient was to have a bowel resection. However, he took a job as a stockbroker instead. Skin: somewhat pale but present. The pelvic exam will be done later on the floor Patient was seen in consultation by Dr Blank, who felt we should sit on the abdomen and I agree Large brown stool ambulating in the hall. Patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities. ======================================================= +------------ BIZARRE HOLIDAYS ------------+ November 21 is False Confession Day and World Hello Day November 22 is Go For a Ride Day November 23 is National Cashew Day November 24 is Thanksgiving - Eat, drink, and be thankful. November 25 is Black Friday, Buy Nothing Day, National Parfait Day and You're Welcome Day - the day after Thanksgiving November 26 is Shopping Reminder Day November 27 is Advent begins and Pins and Needles Day ======================================================= >-->From GoodCleanFun: .:. .:. \|/ .:. _ \\,/// \|/ | \|/ _/_\_ ___ \\|/// <#> | \|<#> | (") /.-.\ (")\\ \|<#>|/ \| / _ //U\\ |(")| //-\\\ | \| /<#>/ ( ) _ \|_|/ /)v(\ <#>_/|_|/\\ \ |/ |/ \| (_` )_('> | | \/~\/ |||\\\ \| | |/ (__,~_)8 ||| //_\\ ||| \\ |/ \| / \| / jgs _YY_ _[|]_ /_____\ _[|]_ \| |/ |/ """"""""'""'""'"""""'""""'""'"""'"""""''"'"""^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ >Reading Skills I once taught a junior-high reading-skills program. Each day my students received a page of the newspaper and we discussed the news, ads and photos. I encouraged them to share an item I would find interesting. One student, a shy young man, seldom joined the conversation, but he read his pages diligently. One day I asked him what he had found. He said, "Did you know that all the people in the obituaries die in alphabetical order?" -<>- >If I Die Once, when my two daughters were young the subject of death came up while we were sitting down for dinner. We talked about what each person in our family would be called if another passed away. The youngest, asked, "What would you be Mommy be if Daddy passed away?" "A widow," I told her "and if I passed away, Daddy would be a widower." Then she asked, "What would I be if my sister passed away?" My husband replied, "A suspect." -<>- >Oven Temperature Because the oven was overshooting the set temperature, I shaved a few minutes off the cooking time for my muffins, set the timer and asked my husband to keep an eye on them while he did the dishes and I dusted. Not long after, I smelled something burning and dashed into the kitchen. "Are those my muffins burning?" I asked him. "Yes," he said as he calmly wiped a dinner plate. "Then why are they still in the oven?" I cried. "Because," he replied, "the timer hasn't gone off yet." -<>- >Riders Three old men went into the pro shop after playing 18 holes of golf. The pro asked, "Did you guys have a good game today?" The first old guy said, "I had the most riders ever. I had five." The second old guy said, "I had 7 riders, the same as last time." The last old man said, "I beat my old record. I had 12 riders today." After they went into the locker room, another golfer who had heard the old guys talking about their game went to the pro and said, "I've been playing golf for a long time and thought I knew all the terminology of the game, but what's a rider?" The pro said, "A rider is when you hit the ball far enough to actually get in the golf cart and ride to it." -<>- >Forgive and Forget Once upon a time in their marriage, my Dad did something really stupid. Mom chewed him out for it. He apologized and they made up. However, from time to time, my mom mentions what he had done. "Honey," my Dad finally said one day, "why do you keep bringing that up? I thought your policy was 'forgive and forget.'" "It is," she said. "I just don't want you to forget that I've forgiven and forgotten." ========================================================= _,, _.-'` ',\ \ .-;`'(,____ \.-'\ _\-` __.-; \_.-'_.-'0 \/ / .'0 __ | /_.' .'o \ / .-. ,;--._\___/--. __./ | .-/ \ ^_> |\ /\ \ / <;/ \ \_/ |___/__\__|` <; | |) \ o ( <; |__.\ |o \ <; \ \ / o _\ <\.)-'`| =====""` \ /\__/__/^\____.-; | | | | | / \____|\____/ |===||===| jgs __/[](_||__l[]_ / || '. \ '-----'-''-'-.__/ >-->Thanksgiving SMILES >From rd.com - Thanksgiving Jokes | Reader's Digest After Thanksgiving dinner, the adults gathered in the living room to exchange reminiscences, while the children went into the family room to play. Suddenly our hostess noticed that an elderly relative was missing. “Where’s Aunt Florence?” she asked. From across the room came a masculine drawl, “Oh, she’s with the kids, bridging the generation gap.” Contributed by Florence M. Mortimer -<>- I worked on a toll road, answering the phone, collecting money and issuing toll tickets. One Thanksgiving Day, a woman called to ask about road conditions on the turnpike. After I said everything was A-okay, she told me a friend was coming for dinner. Then came the stumper. “If my friend just left from exit twelve,” she asked, “what time should I put the turkey in?” Contributed by Sandra Shields -<>- Our eldest daughter, Ann, invited her college roommate to join our large family for Thanksgiving dinner. As families sometimes do, we got into a lively argument over a trivial subject until we remembered we had a guest in our midst. There was an immediate, embarrassed silence. “Please don’t worry about me,” she said. “I was brought up in a family too.” Contributed by Garrison H. McClure -<>- The checkout clerk at the supermarket was unusually cheerful even though it was near closing time. “You must have picked up a ton of groceries today,” a customer said to the checker. “How can you stay so pleasant?” “We can all count our blessings,” the clerk replied. “The hardest part of this job is the turkeys and the watermelons. I just thank God that Thanksgiving doesn’t come in July.” Contributed by L. Proctor -<>- When a music student brought his French horn to my shop for repair, he complained that the instrument “felt stuffy” and he couldn’t blow air through it. It’s not unusual to find partial blockages in brass instruments if small items get lodged in the tubing, but when I tested the instrument, the horn was completely blocked. After much probing and prodding, a small tangerine dropped out of the bell. “Oh,” said the musician when I handed him the fruit. Seeing the bewildered look on my face, he explained, “My mom used the horn for a cornucopia in a Thanksgiving centerpiece.” Contributed by Mark L. Madden -<>- _,--"^^"-.,_ _.-"~^`~-. .-~`^~"-._ ,="`"-._ .----. _.-"`"=, ;_ "-. (0 )( 0) .-" _; .' `~"=,_ '.\ \/ /.' _,="~` `. ;_ "-. _.-) (-._ .-" _; : ^~"-.,___.' ( ) `.___,.-"~^ ; : _: `--' :_ : '._,-~"` :': :': `"~-,_.' '.,_.-`. .'`-._,.' jgs :__.-`-.______.-'`-.__; // \\ (((~ ~))) When a Butterball Talk-Line staffer asked a caller what state her turkey was in (meaning how thawed was it) the caller responded with, “Florida.” A woman in her seventies, cooking Thanksgiving dinner for the first time, called Butterball for help because her mother said she was tired of cooking and it was time her daughter learned how to prepare the Thanksgiving meal. A proud gentleman called to tell the Butterball staff how he wrapped his turkey in a towel and stomped on it several times, breaking the bones so it would fit in his pan. A gentleman called Butterball’s Thanksgiving Turkey Talk-Line to tell the operator he cut his turkey in half with a chain saw and wanted to know if the oil from the chain would adversely affect the turkey. A disappointed woman called Butterball’s Thanksgiving Turkey Talk -Line wondering why her turkey had no breast meat. After a conversation with an operator, it became apparent that the woman’s turkey was lying on the table upside down. One caller to Butterball’s Thanksgiving Turkey Talk-Line had always cut the legs off the turkey before putting it in the oven, thinking that was how you had to cook a turkey. She later learned that the only reason her mom had been doing that was because their oven had been so small that that was the only way to get the bird into the oven! “Thanksgiving dinners take 18 hours to prepare. They are consumed in 12 minutes. Half-times take 12 minutes. This is not coincidence.” —Erma Bombeck -<>- .========. .-| |-. .''-'`_.|__ __ __|._`'-''. / .--'` | [LI] | `'--. \ .' / _.--'''""""'''--._ \ '. /` .' .-' _.----._ '-. '. `\ | / / .' _ _ '. \ \ | | | | / `_ _` \ | | | / / '. | (o)(o) | .' \ \ | | '._| .-""-. |_.' | | | \ / | \ / | \ / | / / | / \ /\/\ / \ | \ \ | | / | '-.( ).-' | \ | | | | | / \`""`/ \ | | | \ \ / | _.-| |-._ | \ / / \ \ | / .' | | '. \ | / / '. './ | .' / \ '. | \.' .' '._| \/ \/ |_.' `'{` , , `}'` { } { } { } { } { } { } \,/ \,/ '. .' jgs '-.__ __.-' { _}""{_ } / \ / \ /=/=|=| |=|=\=\ \/\/\_/ \_/\/\/ >Thanksgiving Jokes! Q: If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? A: Pilgrims! Q: Why do turkeys always go, "gobble, gobble"? A: Because they never learned good table manners! Q: What key has legs and can't open doors? A: A turkey! Q: What happened when the turkey got into a fight? A: He got the stuffing knocked out of him! Knock Knock Who's there? Waddle Waddle who? Waddle I do if you don’t open the door? Q: What did the Turkey say before it was roasted? A: Boy, I'm stuffed! Q: Why did the police arrest the turkey? A: They suspected it of foul play! Q: Which side of the turkey has the most feathers? A: The outside! Q: Can a turkey jump higher than the Empire State Building? A: Yes. A building can't jump at all! Q: Why did the turkey cross the road? A: It was the chicken's day off! Q: What’s the key to a great Thanksgiving dinner? A: The TurKey! Q: What sound does a space turkey make? A: Hubble, Hubble, Hubble! Q: What’s the best dance to do on Thanksgiving? A: The turkey trot! Q: How do you keep a turkey in suspense? A: I’ll let you know next week! Q: Why can’t you take a turkey to Church? A: Because they use such fowl language! Q: Why did the turkey play drums in his band? A: Because he already had drumsticks! Q: Who is not hungry at Thanksgiving? A: The turkey, because he’s already stuffed! Q: What did the turkey say to the turkey hunter? A: “Quack, quack, quack!” Q: What’s blue and covered with feathers? A: A turkey holding its breath! Q: How do you send a turkey through the mail? A: Bird class mail! Q: Why didn’t the turkey eat dessert? A: He was already stuffed! Q: What do you get it you cross a turkey with an octopus? A: Enough drumsticks for Thanksgiving! Q: What are the feathers on a turkey’s wings called? A: Turkey feathers! Q: Why did the turkey sit on the tomahawk? A: To try to hatchet! Q: What’s the best way to stuff a turkey? A: Serve him lots of pizza and ice cream! A: If the Pilgrims were alive today what would they be most famous for? A: Their age! Q: What type of music did the Pilgrims like? A: Plymouth Rock! Q: Why did the Pilgrims eat turkey at Thanksgiving? A: Because they couldn’t fit the moose in the oven! Q: How did the Mayflower show that it liked America? A: It hugged the shore! Q: When the Pilgrims landed, where did they stand? A: On their feet! Q: When did the Pilgrims first say “God bless America”? A: When they first heard America sneeze! ========================================================= >-->From Our Friend LouiseA :) >WARNING - Not a joke - For Facebook users: Just got an email in and there's a ransomware attack on Facebook Messenger. If you get a message on it and only looks like a picture and ends in rvg, don't click on it or you'll be locked out of your phone forever. If you know anybody on your friend's list, let them know too. This is part of the headlines: This is very frightening! Facebook is the biggest force on the internet and hackers have broken into the service. A new form of ransomware is spreading now throughout Facebook. If you use Facebook on your phone or tablet, you are a target. And if you're hit, you'll be locked out of your device, maybe forever. This is an important security alert! --- ...Good to know! Thanks LouiseAu! -<>- .--. {\ / q {\ { `\ \ (-(~` { '.{`\ \ \ ) {'-{ ' \ .-""'-. \ \ {._{'.' \/ '.) \ {_.{. {` | {._{ ' { ;'-=-. | {-.{.' { ';-=-.` / {._.{.; '-=- .' {_.-' `'.__ _,-' jgs |||` .='==, >Stuffed Turkey! The turkey shot out of the oven and rocketed into the air, it knocked every plate off the table and partly demolished a chair. It ricocheted into a corner and burst with a deafening boom, then splattered all over the kitchen, completely obscuring the room. It stuck to the walls and the windows. It totally coated the floor, there was turkey attached to the ceiling, where there'd never been turkey before. It blanketed every appliance, it smeared every saucer and bowl, there wasn't a way I could stop it, that turkey was out of control. I scraped and I scrubbed with displeasure and thought with chagrin as I mopped that I'd never again stuff a turkey with popcorn that hadn't been popped. --- ...TeeHee! Thanks LouiseAu! -<>- A beautiful woman loved growing tomatoes, but couldn't seem to get her tomatoes to turn red. One day while taking a stroll she came upon a gentlemen neighbor who had the most beautiful garden full of huge red tomatoes. The woman asked the gentlemen, "What do you do to get your tomatoes red?" The gentlemen responded, "Well, twice a day I stand in front of my tomato garden and expose myself, and my tomatoes turn red from blushing so much." The woman was so impressed; she decided to try doing the same thing to her tomato garden to see if it would work. So twice a day for two weeks she exposed herself to her garden hoping for the best. One day the gentlemen was passing by and asked the woman, "By the way, how did you make out? Did your tomatoes turn red?" "No" she replied, "but my cucumbers are enormous...." -------- After church one Sunday morning, a mother commented, "The choir was awful this morning." The father commented, "The sermon was too long." Their 7-year-old daughter added, "You've got to admit it was a pretty good show for a dollar." -------- An overweight blonde consulted her doctor for advice. The doctor advised that she run ten miles a day for thirty days. This, he promised, would help her lose as many as twenty pounds. The blonde followed the doctor's advice, and, after thirty days, she was pleased to find that she had indeed lost the pesky twenty pounds. She phoned the doctor and thanked him for the wonderful advice which produced such effective results. At the end of the conversation, however, she asked one last question: "How do I get home, since I am now 300 miles away? -------- Last Sunday, the Gospel was the one about the ten bridesmaids. The five good bridesmaids remembered to take plenty of oil for their lamps; five bad bridesmaids did not. The priest at our church is always very fiery and his sermons always end on a high note. Last Sunday the priest ended with... "Where would you rather be? In the light with the five good bridesmaids or in the dark with the five bad bridesmaids?" Pete wasn't the only one who got it wrong! -------- Two college students, Frank and Matt, are riding on a New York City subway when a beggar approaches them asking for spare change. Frank adamantly rejects the man in disgust. Matt, on the other hand, whips out his wallet, pulls out a couple of singles and gladly hands them over to the beggar with a smile. The beggar thanks him kindly and then continues on to the other passengers. Frank is outraged by his friend's act of generosity. "What on earth did you do that for?" shouts Frank. "You know he's only going to use it on drugs or booze." Matt replies, "And we weren't?" -------- "Dad, will you help me with my homework?" "I'm sorry," replied the father. "It wouldn't be right." "Well," said the boy, "at least you could try." ------- "So tell me, Mrs. Smith," asked the interviewer, "have you any other skills you think might be worth mentioning?" "Actually, yes," said the applicant modestly. "Last year I had two short stories published in national magazines, and I finished my novel." "Very impressive," he commented, "but I was thinking of skills you could apply during office hours." Mrs. Smith explained brightly, "Oh, but that WAS during office hours." -------- KID: "Mother, doesn't God give us our daily bread?" MOM: "Yes, dear." KID: "And Santa brings us our toys at Christmas?" MOM: "Yes, dear." KID: "And the stork brings babies?" MOM: "Why certainly, dear." KID: "Then what's Dad hanging around for?" -------- There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer. When asked to define "Great" he said, "I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!" He now works for Microsoft, writing error messages. -------- A Blonde went into a store that sells curtains and tells the salesman, "I would like to buy a pink curtain for my new computer's screen". The surprised salesman replies: - "But madam, computers do not have curtains...". The Blonde says, "Well Helloooo.. I've got Windows!!!!!!!" -------- The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Christian elementary school for lunch . At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. A teacher had made a note, and posted on the apple tray. It said, "Take only one, God is watching." Moving further along the lunch line at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A child had written a note by the cookies that said, "Take all you want, God is watching the apples!" -------- Four married guys go fishing. After an hour, the following conversation took place: First guy: "You have no idea what I had to do to be able to come out fishing this weekend. I had to promise my wife that I will paint every room in the house next weekend." Second guy: "That is nothing, I had to promise my wife that I will build her a new deck for the pool." Third guy: "Man, you both have it easy! I had to promise my wife that I will remodel the kitchen for her." They continue to fish when they realized that the fourth guy has not said a word. So they asked him. "You haven't said anything about what you had to do to be able to come fishing this weekend. What's the deal?" Fourth guy: "I just set my alarm for 5:30 am. When it went off, I shut off my alarm, gave the wife a nudge and said, "Fishing or love" and she said, "Wear a sweater." --- ...LOL! Thanks LouiseAu! ========================================================= >-->From Our Friend Geniann :) ####### ##[_]## ,;###########;, <<:{{\|@___@|/}}:>> <<:{{| ( /___\\) \}}:>> <<:{{/\ \\___/( /\}}:>> <<<<:{{| \ _.| |(_\/ |}}:>>>> <<<:{{|`\,'| '-' |'./`|}}:>>> <<<:{{|`\/ \___/ \/`|}}:>>> <<<:{{ \// ) ~ ~ ( \\/ }}:>>> <<:{{`{///' ~ ^ ~ '\\\}`}}:>>> <<:{{,=`. ~ ^.~.^ ~ .`=,}}:>> `-,__.__,-' \ | / jgs // \\ .---'( )'---. `---'-` `-'---` An uncertain and nervous witness was being cross-examined... The lawyer thundered, "Have you ever been married?" "Yes, sir," said the witness in a low voice. "Once." "Whom did you marry?" "Well, a woman." The lawyer said angrily, "Of course you married a woman. Did you ever hear of anyone marrying a man?" The witness said meekly, "My sister did." -<>- Fresh out of high school, I found a job cleaning the elegant home of an older couple. Among other duties, I had to dust their many imported carvings and petrified collectibles as well as pick up after their pets. One day I was astonished to find two ivory fossils lying on the floor beside the bookcase. I quickly picked them up and put them back on the shelf. The next week the same thing happened. That afternoon my employer came into the parlor, her faithful canine behind her. Looking around, she eyed the bookcase. "Tricky," she asked the dog, "how in the world do you keep getting your bones up there...?" -<>- >Gun Owners & Logic 101 According to the left wing zealots we have in politics... We're not supposed to judge all Muslims by the acts of a few "crazies". But the acts of a few American “crazies” is enough to judge all Americans who own guns! -<>- >A FLORIDA SHERIFF An illegal alien, in Florida, who got pulled over in a routine traffic stop, ended up "executing" the deputy who stopped him. The deputy was shot eight times, including once behind his right ear at close range. Another deputy was wounded and a police dog killed. The murderer was found hiding in a wooded area. As soon as he took a shot at the SWAT team, officers opened fire on him. They hit the guy 68 times. Naturally, the liberal media went nuts and asked why they had to shoot the poor, undocumented immigrant 68 times. Sheriff told the Orlando Sentinel: "Because that's all the ammunition we had." Now, is that just about the all-time greatest answer or what? The Coroner also reported that the illegal alien died of natural causes. When asked by a reporter how that could be, since there were 68 bullet wounds in his body, he simply replied: (BEST QUOTE ever) . . .. "When you are shot 68 times you are naturally gonna die." --- ...LOL! Thanks Geniann! ======================================================= >-->In The Worldly News: WATCH: CNN Runs Horrifying Video of Attempted Murder While Talking About Trump http://conservativetribune.com/cnn-runs-video-murder-trump/ Latest From MRCtv http://www.mrctv.org/ Latest RightAlerts: http://rightalerts.com/ -<>- >From BizarreNews: A man in Canada, was jailed and he received a large fine for calling in a bomb threat to a Walmart store. 19-year-old Logan Richard Arsenault of Charlottetown, wanted to be a good boyfriend and give his girlfriend a break from work so he called in a bomb threat. The teenager went to a pay phone in Stratford, and called in the bomb threat. His plan worked as all the shoppers and employees of Walmart were evacuated. The store remained closed for six hours, as the Royal Canadian Mounted Police (RCMP) explosives unit and fire- fighters searched the store. As a result of the closure, Walmart suffered loss of business in the amount of approximately $100,000. Arsenault was arrested, and he pleaded guilty to calling in the bomb threat. Chief Judge Nancy Orr in the provincial court ordered him to pay Walmart $89,100 in restitution. Something tells me he's not going to be able to afford that. -<>- One of the more famous Vampire Legends in history is the strange case of Elizabeth Bathory. Countess Elizabeth Bathory was a serial killer from the Bathory family of nobility in the Kingdom of Hungary. The Countess, and some other collaborators, were accused of torturing and killing hundreds of young women between 1585 and 1609. One of the more persistent rumors was that she bathed in the blood of the girls to retain her youth. That accusation has never been proved - or disproved. But as it turns out, ol' 'Batty' Betty might have been on to something after all. The New York Post is reporting on a hot, new beauty trend that involves smearing your face with blood. German orthopedic surgeon Barbara Sturm is known as the mother of the "vampire facial". This treatment involves spreading a layer of the patient's plasma on the face, then using needles to inject it deeper into the skin, because drinking it just doesn't do the trick. She has also created a face cream called MC1 that is infused with proteins from each user's blood for a mere $950. And that is not the only expense. To get your own, personal MC1 you have to fly to Germany where Sturm will draw your blood in order to turn it into a personalized cream. For your convenience she can even do this in your own hotel room, because that doesn't sound like the opening scene of a horror movie. While the beneficial effects have not been clinically proven, Sturm does have a client list which includes names like Cher. But if you can't afford to fly to Germany and drop a thousand bucks on a skin cream, you can probably afford the 50 cents for a razor blade. *-- 'Highlanders' Aren't What They Used to Be --* A woman in Scotland managed to ward off a sword-wielding attacker at a fast food restaurant armed with only a plastic fork. Julie Crighton, 23, chased the attacker, 20-year-old Arthur Rennie, with the plastic utensil after he entered Cowden's News and Fast Food Shop with a sword and demanded she empty the cash register. "This was a large sword and the incident must have been very frightening," Judge Lady Rae of the High Court in Glasgow said. "She is an extremely brave young woman who tackled Mr. Rennie despite the fact he had that sword." Crighton said the man entered the store brandishing a 2-foot sword and entered the store while an accomplice waited at the door. "He came towards me and pushed me and I pushed him back. I think he realised I wasn't going to give him anything. He went out and I went out the shop after him. I wasn't thinking of catching him. Just seeing where he was going." She was able to identify the weapon in court and Rennie was sentenced to four years in prison. *----- You Have to Appreciate the Ingenuity -----* A Cologne drinks vendor modified a bottle-recycling machine to swindle tens of thousands of euros from the German recycling system. The German bottle recycling system is simple enough. Place the bottle in the machine, press the button, take your receipt, and get a few cents back. But the 37-year-old drinks salesman manipulated a bottle-recycling machine in the cellar of his drinks shop to earn a lot more than a bit of spare change. Having installed a magnet sensor into the machine, the man was able to feed the bottle into the mechanism, receive the compensation, and retrieve the bottle without it being shredded. The vendor was able to extract 44,362.75 Euros from the machine by inserting the same bottle into the machine a staggering 177,451 times. He might not have gotten caught if he hadn't rigged a machine in the basement of his own business. Then again, standing around someone elses recycling machine for the days it must have taken to insert a single bottle 177,451 times might have looked suspicious too. *-- Texas Mom Kept Tigers in Home with Daughter --* A Texas woman was arrested on endangerment charges after she was found to be keeping at least three tigers and several monkeys inside her home. Court documents filed against Trisha Meyer allege Houston Police Department officers searched the woman's home when she was accused of receiving a $3,000 payment for a kitten she allegedly failed to deliver to the buyer. Police said Meyer's home had several exotic animals roaming freely inside, including three tiger cubs, an adult big cat variously reported to be a tiger or a cougar, a fox and a skunk. The suspect allegedly told game wardens "the tigers at their current ages were dangerous and could kill." Police said an endangerment investigation was opened due to Meyer's 14-year-old daughter living in the home. Police said the tigers were feeding on raw chicken and were being supervised by a 17-year-old. *------------ You Reap What You Sow ------------* An 82-year-old man from Germany found his lost wedding ring wrapped around a growing carrot after losing the band in his garden three years ago. The man said his wife reassured him the ring would reappear after it fell into the dirt while he was gardening shortly after they celebrated their 50th wedding anniversary. Six months after his wife's death, the ring surfaced. After finding the ring around the middle of the carrot, the man said that sometimes "you reap what you sow." ========================================================= >-->From Our Friend Bunni :) __________________ / _@___@___@___@_ \ |@/ \@| | | | | |@| ,;;;-, |@| | | /;/))))) | | |@| (;/ . .(( |@| .-;;;-. | | ):( > )) | | (((;(::(\ |@| (;)\ = /( |@| ).`\):):) | | )):) .'):) | | < (:(:( |@| .:(:\_(_)( |@| = `\:):\ | | /`::) `\ | | '--')(:(:) |@\_/___________\_/@| )(::)"( jgs \___@___@___@___@___/ .' (::)) / / ;;-` \/ / | >Ladies Bathroom When you have to visit a public bathroom, you usually find a line of women, so you smile politely and take your place. Once it's your turn, you check for feet under the stall doors. Every stall is occupied. Finally, a door opens and you dash in, nearly knocking down the woman leaving the stall. You get in to find the door won't latch. It doesn't matter, the wait has been so long you are about to wet your pants! The dispenser for the modern 'seat covers' (invented by someone's Mom, no doubt) is handy, but empty. You would hang your purse on the door hook, if there was one, but there isn't - so you carefully, but quickly drape it around your neck, (Mom would turn over in her grave if you put it on the FLOOR!), yank down your pants, and assume 'The Stance.' In this position your aging, toneless thigh muscles begin to shake. You'd love to sit down, but you certainly hadn't taken time to wipe the seat or lay toilet paper on it, so you hold 'The Stance.' To take your mind off your trembling thighs, you reach for what you discover to be the empty toilet paper dispenser. In your mind, you can hear your mother's voice saying, 'Honey, if you had tried to clean the seat, you would have KNOWN there was no toilet paper!' Your thighs shake more. You remember the tiny tissue that you blew your nose on yesterday - the one that's still in your purse. (Oh yeah, the purse around your neck, that now, you have to hold up trying not to strangle yourself at the same time). That would have to do. You crumple it in the puffiest way possible. It's still smaller than your thumbnail. Someone pushes your door open because the latch doesn't work. The door hits your purse, which is hanging around your neck in front of your chest, and you and your purse topple backward against the tank of the toilet. 'Occupied!' you scream, as you reach for the door, dropping your precious, tiny, crumpled tissue in a puddle on the floor, lose your footing altogether and slide down directly onto the TOILET SEAT. It is wet of course. You bolt up, knowing all too well that it's too late. Your bare bottom has made contact with every imaginable germ and life form on the uncovered seat because YOU never laid down toilet paper - not that there was any, even if you had taken time to try. You know that your mother would be utterly appalled if she knew, because, you're certain her bare bottom never touched a public toilet seat because, frankly, dear, 'You just don't KNOW what kind of diseases you could get.' By this time, the automatic sensor on the back of the toilet is so confused that it flushes, propelling a stream of water like a fire hose against the inside of the bowl that sprays a fine mist of water that covers your butt and runs down your legs and into your shoes. The flush somehow sucks everything down with such force that you grab onto the empty toilet paper dispenser for fear of being dragged in too. At this point, you give up. You're soaked by the spewing water and the wet toilet seat. You're exhausted. You try to wipe with a gum wrapper you found in your pocket and then slink out inconspicuously to the sinks. You can't figure out how to operate the faucets with the automatic sensors, so you wipe your hands with spit and a dry paper towel and walk past the line of women still waiting. You are no longer able to smile politely to them. A kind soul at the very end of the line points out a piece of toilet paper trailing from your shoe. (Where was that when you NEEDED it??) You yank the paper from your shoe, plunk it in the woman's hand and tell her warmly, 'Here, you just might need this.' As you exit, you spot your hubby, who has long since entered, used, and left the men's restroom. Annoyed, he asks, 'What took you so long, and why is your purse hanging around your neck?' This is dedicated to women everywhere who deal with a public restrooms (rest??? You've GOT to be kidding!!). It finally explains to the men what really does take us so long. It also answers their other commonly asked questions about why women go to the restroom in pairs. It's so the other gal can hold the door, hang onto your purse and hand you Kleenex under the door! This HAD to be written by a woman! No one else could describe it so accurately! --- ...LOL! Thanks Bunni! And Target and Obama would have us go through all this AND Have to worry about what man pervert might be lurking in there with some up-skirt camera or whatever! =============================================================== >-->From CleanLaffs: .-. ,-"""-, / \__ \ | / `\ | \( ^.^ )/ \ - / .-'|;---;|-. (\/ ||___|| `\ \\__/ \__| C|`----`|D __//| | | |====( | | | | _/_/___.---- .===| |====\ /===. | ('------') ( '----' ) | jgs | | En route to Hawaii, I noticed one of my passengers in the coach section of the airplane dialing her cell phone. "Excuse me. That can't be on during the flight," I reminded her. "Besides, we're over the ocean you won't get a signal out here." "That's okay," she said. "I'm just calling my daughter. She's sitting up in first class." -<>- I spent 20 minutes explaining life insurance options to one of our employees. After reviewing the different plans and monthly deductions, he decided to max out, choosing $100,000 worth of life insurance. But he had one last question. "Now," he said, "what do I have to do to collect?" -<>- Sometimes when I reflect on all the beer I drink I feel ashamed. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery and all of their hopes and dreams. The people who produce the bottles. The truck drivers who deliver the beer and the retailers who sell it. If I didn't drink this beer, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, "It is better that I drink this beer and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver." -<>- Paraprosdokians (Winston Churchill loved them) are figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected, frequently humorous. 1. Where there's a will, I want to be in it. 2. The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on my list. 3. Since light travels faster than sound, some people appear bright until you hear them speak. 4. If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong. 5. We never really grow up; we only learn how to act in public. 6. War does not determine who is right--only who is left. 7. Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad. 8. To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research. 9. I didn't say it was your fault; I said I was blaming you. 10. In filling out an application, where it says, 'In case of emergency, Notify:' I put 'DOCTOR.' 11. Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut and still think they are sexy. 12. You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice. 13. I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not so sure. 14. To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target. 15. Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car. 16. You're never too old to learn something stupid. 17. I'm supposed to respect my elders, but it's getting harder and harder for me to find one now. -<>- I volunteered recently to perform a parachute jump for charity. On our first day of training, the instructor made an important point about preparing for landing at 300 feet. "How do you know when you're at 300 feet?" asked one woman. "A good question," replied the instructor. "At 300 feet you can recognize the faces of people on the ground." The woman thought about this for awhile before saying, "What happens if there's no one there I know?" -<>- My boss is without peer when it comes to the rules and regulations that customs officials must follow. But when it comes to the law, well, that's a different story. We were attending a court case in which we were prosecuting a smuggler. The judge asked the court, "Who is making these allegations?" My boss stood up and proclaimed, "I am the alligator, your honor." ========================================================= >-->From AndyChaps: _ _ / ) ( | ____|__ ./ \. ./) (\. (_______________) (((((((((( )))) )))) ^ ^ (((( (((( )))) )))) c b(((( ((((\ ___, /))))) ))))\_`-' _/((((( jgs (((((( `--' )))))) )))))) (((((( >Holiday Parking Rules For Goobers It's almost that time of the year again -- the Holiday Shopping Season. So, for the dingbats out there, here's your list of parking rules. For the non-dingbats, be aware that the dingbats will be out in full-force, and here are their rules: Rule No. 1: When waiting for a parking spot, stop in the middle of the road, don't signal, and orient your car diagonally to prevent others from passing. Rule No. 2: Always park on the lines, taking up as many spots as possible. Diagonal parking is preferred. Rule No. 3: In a crowded parking lot, if you find a spot and have the opportunity to pull through to an adjacent one, drive up halfway and stop on the line, taking both. Rule No. 4: As you pull into a spot, if you see that the space ahead of you is empty and you see another driver signaling to take it, pull though and take it from him. Rule No. 5: Always park close enough to the adjacent car so that the other driver must grease up with Vaseline to squeeze into his or her car. Rule No. 6: When getting out of your car, hit the adjacent vehicle with your door really hard. Rule No. 7: When driving through the parking lot, ignore the painted lanes and drive diagonally from one end to another at a high rate of speed. Rule No. 8: When stopped in front of a store and waiting for a friend/ relative to make a purchase, make sure that you are stopped in the middle of the road. The same rule applies to picking up and discharging passengers. Rule No. 9: When a vehicle from the opposite direction is signaling and waiting for a parking space, position your car so that you are in his way and let the car behind you take it. Rule No. 10: If you have handicapped license plates, use up a regular parking spot. Rule No. 11: If you hit the adjacent car with your door and leave a dent, wait for a car, which is painted the same color as yours, to drive down the aisle looking for a place to park. Then back out, giving up your spot like "Mr. Good Guy," and park somewhere else. Rule No. 12: If the vehicle in front of you stops to let a pedestrian cross or another vehicle turn, pull into the lane of opposite traffic and attempt to pass him. Rule No. 13: When exiting a shopping center into a busy road, exit through the narrow "ENTER ONLY" driveway, stick the nose of the car into traffic, and wait. Rule No. 14: When driving through a parking lot with alternating one-way aisles and angled parking spots, drive the wrong way. Then when you see a parking space, take 20 minutes to do a 12-point turn to pull into it. Rule No. 15: Always leave your shopping cart behind or tightly between parked vehicles. Rule No. 16: Empty your ashtrays on the ground in shopping center parking lots. While you're at it, dump out all the garbage, too, including that Wendy's or McDonald's bag sitting in the back seat from breakfast. Rule No. 17: If you are forced to change an infant's diaper in a parking lot, leave the soiled diaper under the car next to you. Rule No. 18: When another vehicle is waiting for you to pull out of a spot in a crowded parking lot, take your time. Adjust the mirrors, your seat, and the radio. Roll down your window, light a cigarette, and eat your lunch. Feel free to go through your shopping bags and look at what you just bought. Rule No. 19: When pulling into a parking spot, if there is a shopping cart in the way, lightly tap it with your bumper and send it rolling into another car. Then, when you step out, if the cart is still too close, push it down the parking lot aisle and let it go. While the cart is flying solo, turn around and walk toward the stores. Rule No. 20: When walking back to your car in a busy shopping center, gesture to other drivers waiting for a spot to make them think that you are getting in the car and leaving. Then walk between the cars to the next aisle and do it again. -<>- .-""""-._.'| / '.| | / | / ( | -= | /| ) ( | |/`< ) ) ; -=| _| ______ \ \ / .' `. /) '._ _.-""-.< .' `\/) / / \ / ___ .--'`/| _ / | '-._( ____\ (____/_/=, ( \| \ -=/ /--;==============` ._,;'\==='-,..__/__/__.' `'--/,/ || ' \ / | / || ' \ \/ . || ; jgs / / || | | . || | / '=------| / ' ; ; ;| `-.___.___.___.___._/ >A THANKSGIVING POEM TWAS THE NIGHT OF THANKSGIVING, I JUST COULDN'T SLEEP I TRIED COUNTING BACKWARDS, I TRIED COUNTING SHEEP. THE LEFTOVERS BECKONED - THE DARK MEAT AND WHITE BUT I FOUGHT THE TEMPTATION WITH ALL OF MY MIGHT TOSSING AND TURNING WITH ANTICIPATION THE THOUGHT OF A SNACK BECAME INFATUATION. SO, I RACED TO THE KITCHEN, FLUNG OPEN THE DOOR AND GAZED AT THE FRIDGE, FULL OF GOODIES GALORE. I GOBBLED UP TURKEY AND BUTTERED POTATOES, PICKLES AND CARROTS, BEANS AND TOMATOES. I FELT MYSELF SWELLING SO PLUMP AND SO ROUND, 'TIL ALL OF A SUDDEN, I ROSE OFF THE GROUND. I CRASHED THROUGH THE CEILING, FLOATING INTO THE SKY WITH A MOUTHFUL OF PUDDING AND A HANDFUL OF PIE. BUT, I MANAGED TO YELL AS I SOARED PAST THE TREES.... HAPPY EATING TO ALL - PASS THE CRANBERRIES, PLEASE. MAY YOUR STUFFING BE TASTY, MAY YOUR TURKEY BE PLUMP. MAY YOUR POTATOES 'N GRAVY HAVE NARY A LUMP, MAY YOUR YAMS BE DELICIOUS MAY YOUR PIES TAKE THE PRIZE, MAY YOUR THANKSGIVING DINNER STAY OFF OF YOUR THIGHS. MAY YOUR THANKSGIVING BE BLESSED -<>- _..----...__ .-" `"-. | | |__.==========.____| | | .======. | | ____ | | | | | | _.-' ""--.._ |__| '======' |___ | .' '-. _.-'`` '==========' ``""'--.._ / \' '. / ,,,,,,,,, |._.,,;;;''''''''';;;;;;;;;, | ; .;;;;;;;;;;;\ | ,;;;;;| .) .) `;;;;;;;;, / | /;;;;;;;;;;;;;;| ;;;;;/ (_ ';;;;;;;-'` | /;;;;;;;;;;;;;;|| ;;;;;| `;;;;;; | |;;;;''' '/| ';;;;\ '----' ;;;;;' | |;;;' (' (' \\ `''''`---.___.- __;;''` ; |;;' _) \`) |~\ .-' '---'` ``"-. \ |;;;, .___. |/ / \_/__ _/\ _..,/`\ '-._ \"` `-' .'--"----"; `; '-..-/ \| `;;,--`-._____...-' ; ; ; `; \| || / `\ ; ' . ; \ || / / .-""-.\ . ; ; . ; || /`-./ // \\ ; ' . ; | || ; | `'--./| \'. ; ; ' | || | | | \-' ' ; | || | \ \ \ _ ; ' . | |/ \ >--------'. ` `''-._ , ; ; ;'-. _/' \/ '-._ \`'--. / `, / `'---...___/ / ,/---. /\ / \ ; `"""` ; \`- / / \ / \ ; ,-' /-' \ / \'----'----{ .' \ / \ `""` __..-' / \'----..------'''`` / / \ | .-' / \ | | \ / / \ ) '. .'----; ;------; '-._ _.-'___ | |____ | `'--..._______...--'` //__//__| //__//__| jgs | _| _|_ .--'`---` .--'`---` \ |__.\|___.\\_\ ( ( | / / `""\_____..__'.______..___/ \___.-\___.-._____/ >"How To Be A Good Husband" * He consistently spills things in the same location as to avoid making more than one stain in the carpet. * He sees to it that he doesn't always sit in the same place on the couch, to avoid making those unsightly twin-divots. * He masters the art of halfway-communication so that he can watch TV and still answer: uh huh, oh, I see what you mean, etc. at the right time. * He is able to avoid use of the same excuse two-times-in-a-row. * He has learned that a new vacuum cleaner, iron, etc. do not make acceptable anniversary presents. * Admits with only minor prodding that watching Monday Night Football together does not constitute a "date" or family home evening (where applicable). * Has learned all of the childrens' names so that he doesn't have to refer to them as, "Hey, you there". * Knows the proper time to give a sincere compliment and also the proper time to say something such as, "Its definitely an interesting dress." -<>- _.-/`) // / / ) .=// / / / ) //`/ / / / / // / ` / || / \\ / )) .' jgs // / / >Signs In Front Of Churches * Life is fragile, handle with prayer. * We're all invited to a heavenly feast but we must R.S.V.P.! * But St. Peter-- what about my civil rights?" * Don't put a question mark where God put a period. * God loves everyone, but probably prefers 'fruits of the spirit' over 'religious nuts'! * God grades on the cross, not the curve. * God doesn't want shares of your life, He wants controlling interest! * His pain is your gain! * WARNING: Exposure to the Son may prevent burning! * GOD is like Hallmark cards: HE cared enough to send the very best. * "Rapture-- the only way to fly"! * God gives every bird its food, but He does not throw it into its nest. * For all you do, his bloods for you! * T.G.I.F.-- Thank God I'm Forgiven. * Jesus, don't leave earth without Him! * Christ's return is near-- Don't miss it for the world! * Seven days without prayer makes one weak. * Patience is a virtue which carries a lot of wait. * WARNING! In case of rapture this car will be unmanned. * Get Right or get Left! * Read the bible. It's user-friendly plus we offer tech support here on Sundays * GODISNOWHERE (now read it again) * If your bible is falling apart, chances are your life is staying together. * God's last name is not "Darn - It". * In case of nuclear attack-- the ban on praying in school is lifted. * Don't forget, Judas also left early. * Free Life & Fire Insurance, Inquire with-in. * Lord, help me get up when I fall. I can fall by myself. * Christians are the light of the world, but the switch has to be turned on. * This is a Sign from God. * Wise men still seek Him. * Sleep peacefully, God is awake. ========================================================= >-->FUN Places To Net Visit :) Give Praise http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/poems/praise.html Jesus Clinic http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/clinic.html Thank You Lord http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/thanks.html Ohio Indians http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/ohioindians.html Old Barns, Old People, Old Friends http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/barns.html Pay It Forward http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/payitforward.html The Blue Ribbon http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/blueribbon.html Rich VS Poor http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/richvspoor.html Thanksgiving Through The Years http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/thanksgiving.html Thanksgiving Story http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/alices.html Seven Wonders Of The World http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/wonders.html That's God http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/thatsgod.html True Heroes http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/trueheroes.html Love Stories http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/lovestories.html Short Life Stories http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/lifestories.html Value What You Have http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/valuewyh.html More Abundant Life http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/abundantlife.html Yummy DESSERTS http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/easy.html Thanksgiving Animations http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/agifs_p-t.html Thanks and Thank You Animations http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/agifs_u-z.html -<>- >Please Visit This Link to Get New Traffic For Shangrala :) Fun Pages http://www.funpageexchange.com/go.php?uid=3559 -<>- >Please Follow Me On StumbleUpon: http://tinyurl.com/hqz8g5y -<>- >From Spirit & Truth Fellowship: God bless you! Wondering what resources you may have missed from STF recently? New Audio Teachings: Begin with the End in Mind (Nov 2016) Live teaching by Jeff Tyler http://tinyurl.com/j4qeawz Unity (Oct 2016) Live teaching by Dan Gallagher http://tinyurl.com/gvrgp35 Father Figures (Sep 2016) by Dave Hanson http://tinyurl.com/jgd9ftm Living Behind Enemy Lines (Aug 2016) by Dan Gallagher http://tinyurl.com/hwgunt8 Love Your Neighbor As Yourself (July 2016) by John Schoenheit http://tinyurl.com/htsrm7p -<>- >From LynnLynns Links {archive} Melva/A Blessed Thanksgiving http://www.silverandgoldandthee.com/Holiday2/ADayOf.html Rick w/ Thanksgiving Prayer~ http://www.wtv-zone.com/Cruise_2000/r/ThanksPrayer.html Rick w/ Thanksgiving Time~ http://www.wtv-zone.com/Cruise_2000/ram/ThanksgivingTime.html -<>- >From Our Friend LouiseAu :) Clyde McPhatter - The Way I Feel https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z7N7OvTI8nA Spaniels - Stormy Weather http://www.youtube.com/embed/NQo3B5_KzA0?autoplay=1 The Four Lads - No Not Much https://www.youtube.com/embed/-7pvvaIxMec?autoplay=1 G Clefs - 'Cause Your Mine https://www.youtube.com/embed/ejh3RX-Qmh8?autoplay=1 --- ...More super oldie goldies! Thanks LouiseAu! A lot of people can dance and many can do magic but very few can dance and perform magic tricks at the same time. Chinese performer Ma Yan Yan wows the crowd with her dancing moves as well as her sleight of hand as she seems to have an endless supply of cards, ribbons, flags and other objects up her sleeve. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kyBVG_npWug --- ...Fun one! Thanks LouiseAu! -<>- >From Our friend Melody :) games.sallini.com: RoofDrop http://sallini.com/games/thegames/challenge/roofdrop/index.html --- ...Great! Thanks Melody! -<>- >From Our Friend Geniann :) She sent us one we have here... Jesus on the beach - Sand Art! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/sandart.html --- ..Sweet! Thanks Geniann! Saved Pennies: http://tinyurl.com/z98vvo2 --- ...Thanks Bunni! Reminds me of this one... Most Expensive Cars! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/expensivecars.html ======================================================= >-->Quotes & Thunkers: "A new scientific study shows rats are capable of laughter if they are tickled the correct way. The rats were like, 'Why aren't you trying to cure cancer?'" -Seth Meyers "In the U.K., they're launching an official Quidditch League, with eight teams competing across the country. It's the first sports league where everyone has an equal chance of being a loser." -Conan O'Brien "McDonald's is unveiling something called a Nutella burger at its locations in Italy. This goes against the traditional way of eating Nutella, which is with two fingers in the dark while crying at 3 a.m." -James Corden "Apple just released a new app that lets you read books with your kids on your TV. Or as dads put it, 'Yeah, this 'book' is about the Patriots-Seahawks game, and it's a thriller.'" -Jimmy Fallon "According to scientists, the moon is the closest it's been to the Earth since 1948. Apparently, the moon is worried and wants to know what the heck is going on down here." -Conan O'Brien "Last night, the moon appeared larger than normal because it was closer to the Earth. Astronomers call it a super moon. Famed astronomer Neil deGrasse Tyson mocked the hype and said if you had a 15-inch pizza that became a 16-inch pizza, would you call that a super pizza? And I think I speak for everyone when I say, that depends what's on it." -James Corden "Trump received congratulations from Russian President Vladimir Putin. They spent two minutes on the phone discussing politics, then an hour saying, 'No YOU hang up!' 'No YOU hang up first.'" -Jimmy Fallon "Donald Trump will be the first U.S. president ever to have appeared in an ad for Pizza Hut. In fact, some pundits are predicting Trump will run in 2020 against Flo from Progressive." -Conan O'Brien "Vice President Joe Biden got together with incoming Vice President Mike Pence. Biden went over the primary responsibilities of being vice president, which are: not falling asleep at the State of the Union address... and that's about it. So they covered that." -Jimmy Kimmel __ / \ _/=Ll=\_ [________] ___ ||/""\|| .'___`. ( 6. 6 ) / /"""\ \ __, ,__, \_--_/ |( 6 6 )| (--| | .-[\~--~/]-. ~\_-_/~ |--| _ _ _ / \ / \ .-' '-. _| | (_||_)|_)\_| / _, `----' ,_ \ /\_____/\ ( |_, | | ,_| \ \| |/ / / ,_/^\_, \ \ >==[]==< / \_(_|-|_)_/ _______, \/__.''.__\/ //=====\\ (--| _, (_, | TT | // \\ | |_ _ ._ |__, , _ ' ',_ _ | || | // \\ _| | |(_|| || \ /_)(_||\/|| |(_| | || | /'---,___,---'\ ( |_, \_, ,_| ,_| |__||__| / / \ \ [__][__] '--,_________,--' jgs |_ || _| |_ | _| (__)(__) (__)__) >Updated FUN STUFF URLS - Oh Yeah :) Shangy! ------------------------------------------------------------------------ http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/urls.html FUN URLS ------------------------------------------------------------------------ -->FULL LENGTH - FREE On line AUDIO MP3 Christian Foundational Class http://www.truthortradition.com/modules.php?name=News&file=article&sid=61 NEW LIFE IN CHRIST! ------------------------------------------------------------------------ -->This is for all you who love food and DARE to make it at home Yep. You guessed it - Recipes. These are Tried and True, Yummy to the Tummy, good old fashioned home cooking recipes that are EASY to do :) Visit Shangy's Easy-Does-It Home Recipes: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/easy.html Home Recipes >Got A good Recipe? SHARE IT HERE: Share A Recipe ************************************************************************ >TO SUBSCRIBE: Visit Here This Weeks regular Shangy emails OR For the Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com ************************************************************************