Surfer Grandma and More... :) Shangy!
>Here are the details on our Yahoo ShangyFunList:
To Subscribe send a blank email to
ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
To UnSubscribe send a blank email to
ShangyFunList-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com
Group home page:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ShangyFunList
Through no fault of my own we suddenly became an
adult club in the love and romance directory so
you will have to confirm that you are an adult
when you go here. I still have no idea how to change
this back as it sends me around in a circle when I try!
or Web Site:
http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/ShangyFunList.html
Group email address:
ShangyFunList@yahoogroups.com
or email me here:
bcrsystems@earthlink.net
================
>-->In The 'Shangy' News :)
Our friend Kim alerted me to the fact that not all the
videos were working on one of our pages so I corrected
that. Check it out here...
___________
/___________\
| Tavern |
| ____ |
I'm a-callin you | | | |
out Pecos Pete | |##| |
` _n_ _m_ | | | |
O O ===========
<()\ /()>
/\ /\
/ / / \
In Days Past
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/dayspast.html
---
...Thanks Kim! These videos are important to the page!
If you find a page with a non-working video, please let
me know so I can correct it!
-<>-
>2 HOT Off The 'Shangy' Press :)
The first too hot to handy page is from a forward from
our friend PatDeE! It is amazing what this man can do
with scraps auto parts! Check it out here...
_
/_\
.'-'.
.' '.
'_________'
( )
|.---------.|
|: Blinker :|
|: Fluid :|
|'---------'|
(___________)LGB
Junk Car Parts Art!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/junkcarart.html
---
...Pretty cool Art work! Thanks PatDeE!
This next hottie is from our friend Linda. It's hard to
view but shows some of the awesome architecture of Venice
Italy. Most beautiful and sad at the same time. Check it
out here...
_==0_/ /_O ==C
\__ .@___/\______/\/_)__
\ \,----------------------I|_ejm98___________/~-~-~-~
~-~__|___~-~-~-~ ~-~-~-~ ~-~- ~-~-~-~
-~-~-~ ~-~-~-~ ~-~-~-~ ~-~-~-~-~~-~-~
~-~-~-~
Venice Winter Flood!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/venice.html
---
...This took me back to my childhood. My grandma had a
tapestry that totally captured my admiration as a child.
It was of wonderful Venice Italy. Thank You Linda!
=======================================================
>-->From TheFunnyBone:
Learning About The World
__T__I___...__7~
,_ `"|-=||==|==|==|
[_`'---...,____|"_||__|__|__|_
| `'---...__PHILOMENA D_______]
jgs~^~-~^-^~^'----~^~---~---------~^---'`~^-^~~^-^~^
A father and son went fishing one day. After a couple hours out in
the boat, the boy suddenly became curious about the world around him.
He asked his father, "How does this boat float?"
The father thought for a moment, then replied, "I Don't rightly know,
son."
The boy returned to his contemplation, then turned back to his
father, "How do fish breath underwater?"
Once again the father replied, "Don't rightly know, son."
A little later the boy asked his father, "Why is the sky blue?"
Again, the father replied. "Don't rightly know, son."
Worried he was going to annoy his father, he says, "Dad, do you mind
my asking you all of these questions?"
"Of course not son. If you don't ask questions,... you'll never
learn anything!"
=======================================================
*-- Bizarre April Holidays --*
April 1 is One Cent Day
April 2 is National Peanut Butter and Jelly Day
April 3 is Tweed Day and Don't Go To Work Unless It's Fun
Day
April 4 is Tell-A-Lie Day
April 5 is Go For Broke Day
April 6 is Sorry Charlie Day
April 7 is No Housework Day
April 8 is All Is Ours Day
April 9 is Winston Churchill Day and Name Yourself Day
April 10 is Golfers Day
===========================================================
>-->From Our Friend Brenda :)
-.--.
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`~---'
>Surfer Grandma!
The computer swallowed Grandma,
Yes, honestly it's true!
She pressed 'control and 'enter'
And disappeared from view.
It devoured her completely,
The thought just makes me squirm.
She must have caught a virus
Or been eaten by a worm.
I've searched through the recycle bin
And files of every kind;
I've even used the Internet,
But nothing did I find.
In desperation, I asked Mr. Google
My searches to refine.
The reply from him was negative,
Not a thing was found 'online.'
So, if inside your 'Inbox,'
My Grandma you should see,
Please 'Copy, Scan' and 'Paste' her,
And send her back to me.
This is a tribute to all the Grandmas & Grandpas,
Nannas & Pops, who have been fearless and learned
to use the Computer.........
They are the greatest!!!
We do not stop playing because we grow old;
We grow old because we stop playing ..
---
...Too true! HaHa! Thanks Brenda!
-<>-
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; :. :
( 7: )
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>Nurse Pin
While visiting a friend who was in the hospital, I noticed
several of nurses were wearing a pin designed to look like
an apple. I asked one nurse what the pin signified.
"Nothing," she said with a smile. "It's just to keep the
doctors away."
---
...TeeHee! Thanks Brenda!
-<>-
>How Old?
On the first day of school, the teacher greeted the
children and asked their names and ages. When it
came Bennie's turn, he held up four fingers.
"Oh, you're 4," said the teacher. "And when will
you be 5?"
The child stared at her and after a few seconds
replied, "When I hold up the other finger."
---
...HaHa! Thanks Brenda!
-<>-
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>Sometimes we never stop long enough to think outside the box.
I have a friend who used her solar lights inside at night when
her current was off during the hurricane. She stuck them in a jar or
bottle and said they gave off plenty of 'free light'. She put one in
each room and would put them back outside in the daytime and bring them
in at night as long as the current was off. They are safe to use and
cheaper than batteries. Bring in a solar light one night and test it.
Due to a thunderstorm, we lost power for about 5 hours. We
were scrambling around in the darkness, looking for matches, candles,
flashlights, etc. We looked outside, and noticed our solar lights
shining brightly all around our patio, stairs, dock, etc. They were
beautiful. My wife walked outside, and brought several of the solar
lights inside.
We stuck the solar light pipes into plastic drink bottles
containers and they made the nicest, brightest, safest, lighting you
could ever imagine.
We put one in the bathroom, the kitchen, the living room, etc.
There was plenty of light. There are all types of solar lights
available. We bought ours at Harbor Freight. We put them all around
our yard. They look nice and they do not attract flying bugs like the
outdoor lights around our doorway.
The lights we have fit into the small (20 oz) water bottles and
they also fit into most of the larger liter bottles. If you need a
weight in the plastic bottle to keep them from tipping over, you can
put a few of the pretty colorful "flat marbles" that they put in
aquariums, and vases. (you can also use sand, aquarium gravel, etc.,
whatever you have available).
The lights we have were perfect inside our home. They burn all
night long if you need them.
The next day, you just take your solar lights back outside and
they will instantly recharge and be ready for you to use again any time
you need them.
Perfect for power outages, hurricanes, etc.
I never thought of it and now you don't have to.
---
...Great tip! Thanks Brenda!
-<>-
\ /
\ /
\.-./
(o\^/o) _ _ _ __
./ \.\ ( )-( )-( ) .-' '-.
{-} \(// || \\/ ( )) '-.
//-__||__.-\\. .-'
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MJP (' (' ')
>ANT AND THE GRASSHOPPER
This one is a little different.
Two Different Versions.
Two Different Morals.
OLD VERSION:
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his
house, and laying up supplies for the winter.
The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and
plays the summer away.
Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The grasshopper has no food
or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.
MORAL OF THE OLD STORY:
Be responsible for yourself!
***********************
MODERN VERSION:
The ant works hard in the withering heat and the rain all summer long,
building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.
The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and
plays the summer away.
Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and
demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well
fed while he is cold and starving.
CBC, CTV, Global and City TV show up to provide pictures of the
shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable
home with a table filled with food. Canada is stunned by the sharp
contrast.
How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor
grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?
Kermit the Frog appears on CBC News with Peter Mansbridge along with
the grasshopper and everybody cries when they sing, 'It's Not Easy
Being Green.'
People Against Poverty stages a demonstration in front of the ant's
house where the news stations film the group singing, We Shall
Overcome.
Then Olivia Chow has the group kneel down to pray for the
grasshopper's sake.
Dalton McGuinty condemns the ant and blames Prime Minister Harper,
former Premier Mike Harris, Bill Davis, Joe Clarke, Harold Ballard,
and Conrad Black for the grasshopper's plight.
Ed Broadbent and John Sewell explain in an interview with Wendy
Mesley that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper
and both call for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his
fair share.
Finally, the Provincial Liberal/NDP coalition drafts the Economic
Equity and Anti-Grasshopper Act retroactive to the beginning of the
summer.
The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green
bugs and having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes his home is
confiscated by the government Green Czar David Miller and given to the
grasshopper.
The story ends as we see the grasshopper and his free-loading friends
finishing up the last bits of the ant's food while the government
house he is in, which, as you recall, just happens to be the ant's old
house, crumbles around them because the grasshopper doesn't maintain
it.
The ant has disappeared in the snow never to be seen again.
The grasshopper is found dead in a drug related incident, and the
house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who
terrorize and ramshackle the once prosperous and peaceful
neighbourhood.
The entire Nation collapses bringing the rest of the free world
with it.
MORAL OF THE STORY:
Be careful how you vote.
I've sent this to you because I believe that you are an ant!
You may wish to pass this on to other ants, but don't bother sending
it on to any grasshoppers because they wouldn't understand it, anyway.
---
...Okidoki then! Thanks Brenda!
========================================================
>-->In The Worldly News:
[Politics]
>From Our Friend Johanna :)
Malia Obama Vacations In Mexico With 25 Secret Service Agents
http://tinyurl.com/7ggjd7s
Snopes verifies this:
http://www.snopes.com/politics/obama/maliamexico.asp
---
...Isn't it nice what we pay for. Thanks Johanna!
-<>-
>From The TeaParty:
New Must See Video: This Hoax Affects Everyone
http://tinyurl.com/88yddo7
---
...Very disheartening
Breaking News: "Bill Clinton Told Me Obama Not Eligible"
http://tinyurl.com/7fkgc7t
The Clintons were the original “birthers,” Viviano told WND
in an interview in Los Angeles.
http://tinyurl.com/6wcad8p
-<>-
>From BizarreNews: Some People MUST Have Rocks For Brains!
Say you are driving along the Interstate in Vermont and
you come across an unconscious, 30-pound, wild bobcat
lying on the side of the road. What would you do?
Well, if you are a tourist you just might stop, pick the
thing up and put it in the back of your car. But when he
wakes up you better have a taser handy.
A driver from out-of-state pulled this very stunt, picked
up an injured bobcat from the highway, placed it into his
car and drove to the nearby Vermont Welcome Center, state
police said.
Once at the Welcome Center the bobcat woke up. The bobcat
was gravely injured and there was concern about how to
remove it from the vehicle safely.
A veterinarian from the Vermont-New Hampshire Veterinary
Clinic responded to a police call for help. She said that
even though the bobcat wasn't demonstrating or speaking
at a political event, authorities determined the safest
way to deal with it was to incapacitate it with the use
of a hand-held Taser.
The bobcat was Tased through the open car window and while
it was incapacitated the vet administered the sedative.
The bobcat was too seriously injured to be rehabilitated
and was euthanized.
"Never handle a large bird of prey, raccoon, skunk, deer,
opossum, bobcat or bear," a state police spokesperson said.
"While they may appear to be cute and harmless these animals
have particularly powerful talons, teeth, legs, and claws.
All animals are unpredictable, especially when injured or
protecting babies."
*-- Wedding postponed to buy chemo for lizard --*
LONDON - A British woman said she had to postpone her
wedding after spending more than $4,700 on chemotherapy
for her pet lizard. Lizzie Griffiths, 25, of London said
she adopted George, her bearded dragon, last year and
decided to postpone her wedding to Chris Fisher so she
could spend their saved cash to treat the reptile's cancer,
The Sun reported Thursday. "Chris knows George will always
come first," Griffiths said. "I fell in love with George
the minute I saw him and knew I'd do anything to look after
him properly. So right now we can't afford a wedding."
Griffiths said George, who became the first bearded dragon
in Britain to undergo chemotherapy, is now in remission.
Fisher said he understands that George will always be
"Lizzie's No. 1."
*-- Man called 911 to make wife go to bed --*
WESLEY CHAPEL, Fla. - A Florida man serving a 60-day jail
sentence for misuse of 911 called the emergency line
because his wife would not leave him alone to check his
Facebook. The Pasco County Sheriff's Office said Doyle
Hardwick, who began serving his sentence Tuesday, called
911 on Sept. 24 and told the dispatcher his wife refused
to stop sitting next to him and go to bed, the Tampa Bay
Times, St. Petersburg, Fla., reported Thursday. Hardwick,
57, told the operator his wife told him she would go to
bed if he let her drink some beers, but she refused to
leave the seat next to him upon finishing her beverages.
He said he was upset his wife would not let him "look at
Facebook peacefully," the 911 transcript states. Deputies
said both Hardwick and his wife smelled of alcohol when
they arrived at their home. Hardwick pleaded no contest to
misuse of 911 in February and an arrest warrant was issued
when he failed to show up to serve his sentence. He turned
himself in Tuesday and began serving his 60 days.
*-- Medical pot delivery man: Ninjas robbed me --*
WEST COVINA, Calif. - Police in Southern California said a
medical marijuana delivery man told them he was robbed by
two people dressed as ninjas. West Covina police said the
man, who is in his 40s, told investigators he was return-
ing to his vehicle after making a delivery shortly before
10 p.m. Friday when "he was approached by two subjects in
ninja costumes who chased him with batons," the San Gabriel
Valley (Calif.) Tribune reported Monday. "The victim said
he was scared and he dropped a bag with some marijuana and
money. The suspects took it," police Lt. Alan Henley said.
Police said they had no reports of other recent crimes in
which perpetrators were dressed as ninjas.
*-- $26 hot dog on Rangers Ballpark menu --*
ARLINGTON, Texas - The company that handles concessions
for the Texas Rangers said fans at Rangers Ballpark will
be able to buy a 1-pound hot dog for $26. Concessions
firm Sportsservice said the "Boomstick" hot dog, named
in honor of right fielder Nelson Cruz, is topped with
shredded cheese, chili, sauteed onions and fries,
ESPNDallas.com reported Monday. "I don't know how many
calories are in this thing, but it's got to be 2,000
or 3,000," said Casey Rapp, operations manager for
Sportsservice. "We did a half-pound hot dog during the
World Series and wanted to top it," Rapp said. "Our
company had to have the hot dog made special and we had
to find a local bakery to make the bun. The bun is like
a loaf of bread just to hold this thing."
=========================================================
"=.
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|=-./~\___/~\ / `-._\
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// `~-.=`"`' || ||
LGB || _.-_/| || |\_.-_
_.-_/| /_.-._/ |\_.-_ \_.-._\
/_.-._/ \_.-._\
>-->CLASSIFIEDS
The following were taken from actual classified ads in
newspapers:
AMANA WASHER $100.
OWNED BY CLEAN BACHELOR WHO SELDOM WASHED.
FREE PUPPIES...PART GERMAN SHEPHERD - PART DOG
COWS, CALVES NEVER BRED...
ALSO 1 GAY BULL FOR SALE.
83 TOYOTA HUNCHBACK -- $2000
FREE PUPPIES:
1/2 COCKER SPANIEL -
1/2 SNEAKY NEIGHBOR'S DOG
SOFT & GENITAL BATH TISSUES OR FACIAL TISSUE
89 cents
GERMAN SHEPHERD 85 lbs.
NEUTERED. SPEAKS GERMAN. FREE.
SHAKESPEARE'S PIZZA - FREE CHOPSTICKS
FOUND: DIRTY WHITE DOG.
LOOKS LIKE A RAT...
BEEN OUT AWHILE..
BETTER BE REWARD.
HUMMELS - LARGEST SELECTION EVER
"IF IT'S IN STOCK, WE HAVE IT!"
GET A LITTLE JOHN:
THE TRAVELING URINAL
HOLDS 2 1/2 BOTTLES OF BEER.
FREE: FARM KITTENS. READY TO EAT.
AMERICAN FLAG
60 STARS - POLE INCLUDED
$100
NOTICE:
TO THE PERSON OR PERSONS WHO TOOK THE LARGE
PUMPKIN ON HIGHWAY 87 NEAR SOUTHRIDGE STORAGE:
PLEASE RETURN THE PUMPKIN AND BE CHECKED.
PUMPKIN MAY BE RADIOACTIVE.
ALL OTHER PLANTS IN VICINITY ARE DEAD.
EXERCISE EQUIPMENT:
QUEEN SIZE MATTRESS & BOX SPRINGS -$175.
KELLOGG'S POT TARTS - $1.99 box
FULLY COOKED BONELESS SMOKED MAN - $2.09 lb.
=============================================================
>-->From LaughAndLift:
*/The Lift/*
_
_( )_
( (o___
| _ 7
\ (")
/ \ \
( ) )
| \ __/
| |
( /
\ /
) /(_
| (___)
\___)
kurt scaletta
Alone
(by Dr. James L. Wilson)
I love the solitude of a Trout stream or a good book, and every now and
then, when life gets hectic, I'll say, 'I just wish everyone will leave
me alone.'
A few years ago I was isolated from people after drinking radioactive
iodine as a treatment for papillary cancer. I wasn't allowed any
visitors, not even the doctor, instead, he stood behind a lead screen
at the door to talk to me. The first few hours was wonderful, but after
that, I needed human contact. Though periods of solitude are a welcome
respite from 'busyness,' the truth is, I hate being alone.
It's not just me either, something happens to people when they are
isolated.
Every now and then, a television reporter will put a microphone into
the face of a serial killer's neighbor and ask for a description of the
criminal. Inevitably, the same term will surface, 'He was a 'loner,''
they'll say, 'He kinda kept to himself.'
The FBI describes Eric Rudolph, the suspected bomber of Centennial
Olympic Park during the 1996 Olympic Games, as a 'loner.' You'll
remember that reporters used the same term to describe the convicted
Unabomber, Ted Kaczynski, when he was arrested near Lincoln, Montana
in May of 1996.
God said, 'It is not good that man should be alone,' (Gen. 2:18) so He
created Eve as a wife for Adam. When Jesus sent his disciples on a
mission trip, He sent them out in pairs.
Yet, many Christians find themselves in spiritual isolation. They
minister alone, study alone and live their Christian life alone. Though
times of solitude are helpful to everyone, there is something unhealthy
about being a 'Lone Ranger' Christian.
After all, even the Lone Ranger had Tonto.
-<>-
|
--====|====--
|
.-"""""-.
.'_________'.
/_/_|__|__|_\_\
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jgs `"-// \\.._\ /_..// \\-"`
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`"` ``---`` `"`
>Travel Agent Stories
The following are actual stories provided by travel agents:
I had someone ask for an aisle seat on the plane so that their hair
wouldn't get messed up by being near the window.
A client called in inquiring about a package to Hawaii. After going
over all the cost info, she asked "Would it be cheaper to fly to
California and then take the train to Hawaii?"
I got a call from a woman who wanted to go to Capetown. I started to
explain the length of the flight and the passport information when she
interrupted me with "I'm not trying to make you look stupid, but
Capetown is in Massachusetts."
Without trying to make her look stupid, I calmly explained, "Capecod is
in Massachusetts, Capetown is in Africa." Her response...click.
A man called, furious about a Florida package we did. I asked what was
wrong with the vacation in Orlando. He said he was expecting an
ocean-view room. I tried to explain that is not possible since Orlando
is in the middle of the state. He replied "Don't lie to me. I looked on
the map and Florida is a very thin state."
I got a call from a man who asked "Is it possible to see England from
Canada?" I said "No" He said "But they look so close on the map."
Another man called and asked if he could rent a car in Dallas. When I
pulled up the reservation, I noticed he had a 1 hour lay-over in
Dallas. When I asked him why he wanted to rent a car, he said "I heard
Dallas was a big airport and I need a car to drive between the gates to
save time."
A nice lady just called. She needed to know how it was possible that
her flight from Detroit left at 8:20 am and got into Chicago at 8:33am.
I tried to explain that Michigan was an hour ahead of Illinois, but she
could not understand the concept of time zones. Finally I told her the
plane went very fast, and she bought that!
A woman called and asked "Do airlines put your physical description on
your bag so they know who's luggage belongs to who?" I said "No, why do
you ask?" She replied "Well, when I checked in with the airline they
put a tag on my luggage that said FAT, and I'm overweight, is there any
connection?" After putting her on hold for a minute while I looked into
it (I was actually laughing) I came back and explained the city code
for Fresno is FAT and that the airline was just putting a destination
tag on her luggage.
I just got off the phone with a man who asked "How do I know which
plane to get on?" I asked him what exactly he meant, to which he
replied, "I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these planes
have numbers on them."
A woman called and said "I need to fly to Pepsi-cola on one of those
computer planes." I asked if she meant to fly to Pensacola on a
commuter plane. She said "Yeah, whatever"
A business man called and had a question about the documents he needed
in order to fly to China. After a lengthy discussion about passports, I
reminded him he needed a visa. "Oh no I don't, I've been to China many
times and never had to have one of those." I double checked and sure
enough, his stay required a visa. When I told him this he said, "Look,
I've been to China four times and every time they have accepted my
American Express!"
A woman called to make reservations "I want to go from Chicago to
Hippopotamus, New York" The agent was at a loss for words. Finally, the
agent asked "Are you sure that's the name of the town?" "Yes, what
flights do you have?" replied the customer. After some searching, the
agent came back with "I'm sorry, ma'am, I've looked up every airport
code in the country and can't find a Hippopotamus anywhere" The
customer retorted, "Oh don't be silly! Everyone knows where it is.
Check your map!" The agent scoured a map of the state of New York and
finally offered "You don't mean Buffalo, do you?" "That's it! I knew it
was a big animal" was the reply.
_SUBSCRIBE INFO_
Want to receive a Christian inspirational item AND great clean humor in
an email to you each day of the week? It's easy and FREE! Read all
about Laugh & Lift at http://www.laughandlift.com
=============================================================
>-->From CleanLaffs:
_____________
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"------"
As I was on the way home from a long and stressful day at
the office, the car phone rang. It was my husband.
"Will you be joining me in the whirlpool tonight?" he asked.
"What a lovely way to spend an evening," I thought. I was
about to tell him how considerate he was when he continued,
"Because if you're not, I need to start adding more water
to the tub."
-<>-
When his auto mechanic came in for an operation, Dr. Grimley
couldn't help but take the opportunity to turn the tables on
him.
"Well Frank," said the doctor, "It's going to take at least
five days for the parts to get in. As for the cost, there's
no way to tell until we get in there and see exactly what
the problem is."
-<>-
John was tasked with taking the Christmas decorations up to
the attic for another year's storage. During one trek up the
stairs, heavily laden with boxes, he slipped and luckily
only fell about two steps before landing square on his
behind.
His wife heard the noise and yelled, "What was that thump?"
"I just fell down the stairs," he explained.
She rushed into the room, "Anything broken?!"
"No, no, I'm fine."
There was just a slight pause before his loving wife said,
"No, I meant my decorations? Are any of them broken?"
-<>-
A woman came into my pharmacy with a shopping list. As she
asked for items such as hair spray and toothpaste, I inquired
what size of each she wanted. Everything was going well until
she requested a bottle of Pepto-Bismol.
I was surprised when, in response to my usual question, "What
size?" she said, "What size would you suggest? I'm only having
four for dinner."
-<>-
While I was shopping in the mall with my three children, a
display in the window of a lingerie store caught my eye.
"Do you think Daddy would like this?" I asked the kids, as
I pointed to the lacy pijamas with matching robe.
"No way," my horrified six-year-old son replied. "Daddy
would NEVER wear that!"
-<>-
|\ ___
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L L \ ./--+///___)_.--' /\ -. \ d e f g /
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| J_.L_.' \ / _\_/\ (
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`---'
One semester when my brother, Peter, attended the University
of Minnesota in Minneapolis, an art-student friend of his
asked if he could paint Peter's portrait for a class assign-
ment. Peter agreed, and the art student painted and submitted
the portrait, only to receive a C minus.
The art student approached the professor to ask why the grade
was so poor.
The teacher told him that the proportions in the painting
were all incorrect. "The head is too big," the professor
explained. "The shoulders are too narrow, and the neck is
way too long."
The next day, the art student brought Peter to see the pro-
fessor.
He took one look at my brother and said, "Okay, A minus."
-<>-
In a very exclusive private school near California's Silicon
Valley, a third-grade teacher was lecturing her upper-high-
class students about the less fortunate. She asked them each
to write an essay about a poor family in the area.
One little girl's paper began: "Once upon a time there was a
poor family. The father was poor. The mother was poor. The
children were poor. The nannies were poor. The pool man was
poor. The personal trainer was poor. The gardners were poor.
This was a very poor family!
-<>-
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_/ _); `. ` `-. .`\ ) +++/ \ ,," %&-. ; \\|
`-` `-=.;_,.__.__\_,/ )_/___+_/_________\,"(_//_(__)______:-._)
gpyy
A high school senior saw an inspirational advertisement on
television about becoming a teacher. She called the number
shown: 1-800-45TEACH. After a woman answered, the student
babbled on about how she thought she had found her life's
calling and could she send her some information.
The lady who answered the phone asked the student what
number she was calling. The student told her and there was
a pause. Then she said, "You misspelled TEACH."
========================================================
>-->FUN Places To Net Visit :)
Cost Of A Child
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/costofchild.html
How True It Is!
http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/nyear.html
Journey Through Life!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/journey.html
Chainsaw Wood Carving
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/woodcarving.html
Paper Art
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/paperart.html
Amazing Horse Trainer
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/horsetrainer.html
Elephant Rescue!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/elephants.html
Great White Shark!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/greatwhite.html
Thinkers And Their Desks
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/desks.html
World Of Big Cats
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/bigcats.html
-<>-
>From Our Friend Johanna :)
She wished me a happy birthday by going here...
http://www.minibite.com/cards/birthday/ihope.htm
---
...LOL! Aww, Thank You Bunches Johanna!
-<>-
>From Our Friend Brenda :)
Little Bobby Harrison, Trumpet Player
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jXHrv6s3pQE&feature=related
---
...Great talent! Thanks Brenda!
-<>-
>From Our Friend Linda :)
MAKE SURE YOU WATCH THIS ONE - ONLY 52 SECONDS
Make sure your wife, husband, TEENAGERS, and all your friends see this!
No sound, just watch. You will be flabbergasted. It COULD have happened
To anyone of us. If you notice he got away with her car, purse, and keys
Without touching her . . .
Worst of all, she couldn't even give a description of the person to the
Police!
I could see myself doing exactly what she did!
I'm glad I saw this video. Please watch and pass it on.
Creative Car Thief Caught on Security Camera
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NXu4vhstK0s
---
...Yeppers! Thanks Linda!
-<>-
>From Our Friend Bunni :)
Best Glock Gun Commercial
http://www.youtube.com/embed/vsVCHE7ayPE?rel=0
---
...Oh Yeah! Thanks Bunni!
-<>-
>From Our Friend PatDeE :)
Cup Of Coffee
http://tinyurl.com/6zxf54r
---
...Nice One! Thanks!
-<>-
>From Our Friend Wesley :)
ripped : oxford dictionaries spelling challenge
http://blog.oxforddictionaries.com/media/spelling-bee-2011/
---
...Hey! They don't have beginner level? HaHa! Thanks Wesley!
==============================================================
>-->Quotes & Thunkers:
"Some things just aren't funny. Beatings aren't funny. Mimes
aren't funny. But beating a mime - why is that so hilarious?"
-- Dave Attell
"Instead of saying 'hello', my mother gets on the phone and
says, 'Guess who died?'" --Dom Irrera
"Whenever I see one of those ads where you get eight CDs for
a penny, and then you have to pay another panny for the next
CD, I immediately call up and demand to know why the last one
is so expensive. Why does it cost eight times as much as the
others?" --Bill Dwyer
"The frightening reality is every day this society seems to
make its legal decisions in much the same way the Archies
picked their vacation spots -- blindfold Jughead, give him
a dart and spin the globe." --Dennis Miller
"You ever have somebody owe you money, and have the nerve to
wear new clothes around you? Brand-new clothes, and they point
them out, like, 'Hey, look what I just picked up!' 'Well, did
you see my money while you were down there?'" --Chris Rock
"They added up all the people in this country who consider
themselves a minority and it added up to more than the pop-
ulation of the country." --Bill Maher
"What is it with dads? They turn forty or fifty and suddenly
they become Mr. Fix-it. You find them cruising around the
house with a screwdriver in one hand. 'I'm gonna tighten
something.'" --Gary Barkin
"We're fishing and my wife had a problem with killing the
fish. I wasn't exactly crazy with that part either, but I
figured, if we just wait for them to die naturally, it could
take forever. Certainly till after supper." --Paul Reiser
"You need to have a stupid girlfriend so that on a bad day
you can call her. 'Tanya, I'm having a bad day, tell me
something stupid you've done. You caught on fire, and you
tried to put it out with alcohol?'" --Ellen Cleghorne
>Updated FUN STUFF URLS - Oh Yeah :) Shangy!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/urls.html
FUN URLS
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
-->BECOMING A CHRISTIAN
HOW TO BE A CHRISTIAN!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
-->FULL LENGTH - FREE On line AUDIO MP3 Christian Foundational Class
http://www.truthortradition.com/modules.php?name=News&file=article&sid=61
NEW LIFE IN CHRIST!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
-->This is for all you who love food andd DARE to make it at home Yep.
You guessed it - Recipes. These are Tried and True, Yummy to the Tummy,
good old fashioned home cooking recipes that are EASY to do :)
Visit Shangy's Easy-Does-It Home Recipes:
http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/easy.html
Home Recipes
>Got A good Recipe? SHARE IT HERE:
Share
A Recipe
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