Survivor Texas Style And More ... :) Shangy! >Here are the details on our Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com To UnSubscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com Group home page: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ShangyFunList Through no fault of my own we suddenly became an adult club in the love and romance directory so you will have to confirm that you are an adult when you go here. I still have no idea how to change this back as it sends me around in a circle when I try! or Web Site: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/ShangyFunList.html Group email address: ShangyFunList@yahoogroups.com or email me here: bcrsystems@earthlink.net ================ >-->In The 'Shangy' News :) .-=":-=") |_.'|_.' /" /" : / / / .' .' : .-'-.---. / .--"""""--.. : .((((__ .\ ___.:-//\\\\\\-._ -. __..--'"` [.]-[.] \\_. ` `""--..__ ..---\ ___(/_ | /___ /---.. """",-/_...---'"`` \,_ /.- ``"'---..__\-,"""" " /"""'"'""""/ " \`'-.__.-' \___ aa/wkm "._________".' * READER COMMENTS * From Sassyann: All have red X's no pictures --- ...Sorry. Yahoo hosts the web site - when Yahoo has trouble, my pictures don't display. Please try again. Thank You! From Gail When you send these lists there are a couple of jokes I'd like to send to my friends, but there is no option to send just the one joke. In particular I wanted to send the survivor texas style. Please advise. -Gail -- ...You can copy and paste any joke you wish to send to your friends or family. I'd like that the whole of it were shared in tact but do realize my emails are quite long, so I don't hold people to it. If you don't know how to copy and paste, here is instructions on how to do it. Click this link: http://tinyurl.com/6aa4svd -<>- FACEBOOK USES I thought I would remind you that you can visit me on Facebook. I sure would appreciate your 'likes'! It's looking pretty bleak with only 30 of them! Please go here and cast a 'LIKE' vote for ShangralaFamilyFun.com http://tinyurl.com/cll4d2u Thank You - Thank You - Thank You! GOD BLESS YOU AS YOU DO! I've been sharing wonderful images from our friend Brenda there too! --- ...These are a delight! Thank You Brenda! -<>- >-->2 HOT Off The 'Shangy' Press :) \ ,,,,,, /e ''( (_ ` \ ___> \ / ,_\-.___ \_ / _)/ / \ | \ / ` _ | __\____/ / ' | / _ /______/ / _/ \,_____/o ( \__)/` \ / \__________/_/_ _/ \ \ )/ \ / / | /\ ( \_____/ ___/ \ \ _/ \ ______/_/___|_| ) \ / / o\ o\ / / /\ b'ger,,,'-----^--',,,,,,',,|_,,\_ ,,\/,, Today we have two wonderful thought provoking inspirations. They are both classics done up quite nicely for your viewing pleasure! This first sizzling hottie is from our friends Linda and NancyF. It reminds us that your attitude makes all the difference! Check it out here... Rich VS Poor http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/richvspoor.html --- ...Awww, a most wonderful perspective! Thank You Linda and NancyF! This next too hot to handle one comes from our friends PatDeE and NancyF. It reminds us to stop taking our life for granted. Check it out here... Paradox Of Our Times http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/paradoxofourtimes.html --- ...awww, Most Beautifully done! Thank You PatDeE and NancyF! -<>- *~* We Had A SUPER Blessing Of Caring And Sharing Last Month! . `: : : . __.'_ .' : _.--' `-._.' .-'.. .. `. : .-. .--.`. : : : : : : : : :`;; :`; ; : `.`O;' `O;.' : .' .---. .--. ; . : '._ :' ; :: : .-`-.; . .' .': `. ``` `. :-' : : `-.__ ._ _.' : ; : ;``` : `. _.-.' . ``-._ : `.-' : : `-. : _.: ` `-._ `, `._.-' ; `.`-. ;_, _., : `.: ;' ;-' ; : ``.___.' : : ;_..--' `. ; `-.__ ...' : : : jgs :-:__; : : : .-~~~--..__: : :___..---.. .'.' : `, :,' : `; ; `: _.'`._ :,' `~~~'----'' `'-.____....' Be sure to view and share these with all your friends and family! Big Boy Toys! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/bigboytoys.html Honor Nature! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/honornature.html Hearts In Nature! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/heartsinnature.html Hearts In Nature 2! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/heartsinnature2.html Trucks! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/trucks.html Running Horses! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/runninghorses.html Creation Vs Coincidence! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/creationvscoincidence.html Got A Nanosecond 3? http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/nano3.html *~* Our Heartfelt Thanks & Appreciation Goes Out To Our Contributors! You Enrich our lives! God's Most Abundant Blessings To You! ======================================================= >-->From TheFunnyBone: Sure I've Gotten Old... I've had 2 Bypass surgeries. A hip replacement, new knees. Fought prostate cancer, and diabetes. I'm half blind, can't hear anything quieter than a jet engine, take 40 different medications that make me dizzy, winded, and subject to blackouts. Have bouts with dementia. Have poor circulation, hardly feel my hands and feet anymore. Can't remember if I'm 85 or 92. Have lost all my friends. But.....Thank God, I still have my Florida driver's license! ___________________________ / _______ \ || .sss. | F L O R I D A | ||SS"""S | | ||S a\aS | Xxxxx Xxxxxxx | ||S = / | 2892 XxxxxxXx | ||_/ -'__| XXXX, XXX 32708 | |htxx wtxx RR302042 | jgs \____________________________/ ======================================================= +------------ BIZARRE HOLIDAYS ------------+ March 4 is Holy Experiment Day March 5 is Multiple Personalities Day March 6 is National Frozen Food Day March 7 is National Crown Roast Of Pork Day March 8 is Be Nasty Day March 9 is Panic Day March 10 is Festival Of Life In The Cracks Day March 11 is Johnny Appleseed Day and Worship ======================================================= >-->From GoodCleanFun: ___ ,-'" "`-. ,'_ `. / / \ ,- \ __ | \_0 --- | / | | | \ \ `--.______,-/ | ___) \ ,--"" ,/ | / _ \ \-_____,- / \__-/ \ | `. ,' \___/ < ´--------' \__/\ | Wny \__// >Clocks A man died and went to heaven, where he met St. Peter sitting at a desk in the middle of a great hall. On the walls were millions of clocks. "What are those used for?" he asked. St. Peter said, "There's one of them for every living person on Earth ticking out the days of their lives." The newcomer noticed that the hands of some of the clocks were moving faster than others. "Why do they move at different speeds," he asked. St. Peter said, "Every time you tell a lie you lose one hour of your life and your clock speeds up." The newcomer looked around and then asked, "Do you have one of these for my congressman?" St. Peter answered, "Sure! It's in the back room. We use it for a ceiling fan." -<>- >Lost Cell Phone My wife called me after driving to an appointment. She arrived and I could tell from her voice that she was getting frustrated. Finally she said, "I know I had my cell phone with me. And now I can't find it!" I replied, "Aren't you talking on it?" There was a solid period of stunned silence as the reality of the situation sank in, followed by, "You are NOT going to tell anybody about this!" -<>- >Perfume The young man says to his date, "I really like the perfume you're wearing. What's it called?" The young lady looks puzzled for a minute then searches through her purse, finally dumping the contents on the table between them. She searches through the pile and finally finds a small spray bottle. She examines the label and announces, "Here it is ... 'Unforgettable'." -<>- >Professional Photographer People don't like to look dumpy in their own photos, which is why a local professional photographer gets a lot of requests asking him to retouch photos. You know, erase the crow's-feet, lop off the 'love handles' -- that sort of thing. Therefore, he wasn't surprised when one woman, pointing to a family portrait, asked him, "Can you take thirty pounds off me?" until she added, "and put it on my sister?" -<>- >Subway Drop The Manhattan Commuter train was packed. Suddenly there was a jingle on the floor. Most necks were craned. One elderly gentleman, however, bent down and picked something up. He then asked, "Did anyone drop a half dollar?" "I did," answered three men at once. "Well," said the elderly gent with a smile, "here's a dime of it." ========================================================= >-->From Our Friend Linda :) , `.-- .,-"" . ._,' . _,. `. , / .'.oo`.. `. `- .__.-' :: .; "-()-"`. \.-. / doida ; /'". ,"`'. "-- "-" .': : `----' "-" ' >Stay Young My Friend We all need to read this one over and over - until it becomes part of who we are! HOW TO STAY YOUNG 1. Try everything twice. [as long as it is not evil!] On one woman's tombstone she said she wanted this epitaph: "Tried everything twice. Loved it both times!" 2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down. (Keep this in mind if you are one of those grouches!) 3. Keep learning: Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever... Never let the brain get idle. 'An idle mind is the devil's workshop.' And the devil's name is Alzheimer's! 4. Enjoy the simple things. 5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath. And if you have a friend who makes you laugh, spend lots and lots of time with HIM /HER. 6. The tears happen: Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. LIVE while you are alive. 7. Surround yourself with what you love: whether it's family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever.. Your home is your refuge. 8. Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help. 9. Don't take guilt trips.. Take a trip to the mall, even to the next city, state, to a foreign country, but NOT to where the guilt is. 10. Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity. I love you, my special friend. 11. Forgive now those who made you cry. You might not get a second chance. And if you don't send this to at least 4 people - who cares? But do share this with someone. Remember! Lost time can never be found. Be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle. Wine does not make you FAT ..... - it makes you LEAN ..... (Against tables, chairs, floors, walls and ugly people.) --- ...LOL! Thanks Linda! ========================================================== >-->From Our Friend LouiseA :) ,'-', :-----: (''' , - , ''') \ ' . , ` / \ ' ^ ? / \ ` - ,' `j_ _,' ,- -`\ \ /f ,- \_\/_/'- , `, , , /\ \ | / \ ', , f : :`, , <...\ , : ,- ' \,,,,\ ; : j ' \ \ :/^^^^' \ \ ; ''': \ -, -`.../ ' - -,`,--` \_._'-- '---: Storm >Worthy of re-posting - "Survivor - Texas Style" Due to the popularity of the "Survivor" shows, Texas is planning to do one entitled: "Survivor - Texas-Style!" The lucky contestants will all start in Dallas, drive to Waco, Austin, San Antonio, then over to Houston and down to Brownsville. They will then proceed up to Del Rio, El Paso, Odessa, Midland, Lubbock, and Amarillo. From there they will go on to Abilene and Fort Worth. Finally back to Dallas. Each contestant will be driving a pink Prius with 15 bumper stickers which will read: 1. "I'm A Democrat" 2. "Amnesty For Illegals" 3. "I Love The Dixie Chicks" 4. "Boycott Beef" 5. "I Voted For Obama" 6. "George Strait Sucks" 7. "Re-elect Obama In 2016" 8. "Vote Eric Holder Texas Governor" 9. "Rosie O’Donnell Is Texas Born" 10. "I Love Obama Care and Chuck Schumer" 11. "Barney Frank Is My Hero" 12. "I Side With Jane Fonda" 13. "It's Bush's Fault" 14. “Islam Is A Peace-Loving Religion ..and the last sticker is… 15. "I'm Here To Confiscate Your Guns" The first contestant to make it back to Dallas alive wins. --- ...LMAO! Ode to the Heart Of Texas! Thanks LouiseA! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n1fZbIAOsoE -<>- _____ _ _____ ____ /_ /, | ,-, ) /'_`\ |_ _| | __| \ \> | `-'< | (_) | | | | _| ) )__ ,_ |_|`\_\ \___/ |_| |_| (_.-'_)__$ ;-'' pb >SMILES Tim decided to tie the knot with his long time girlfriend. One evening, after the honeymoon, he was assembling some shell reloads for an upcoming hunt. His wife was standing there at the bench. After along period of silence she finally speaks. "Honey, I've been thinking, now that we are married I think it's time you quit hunting, shooting, hand loading, and fishing. Maybe you should sell your guns and boat." Tim gets this horrified look on his face. She says, "Darling, what's wrong?" "There for a minute you were sounding like my ex-wife." "Ex wife!" she screams, "I didn't know you were married before!" "I wasn't." ---------- Mary Clancy goes up to Father O'Grady after his Sunday morning service, and she's in tears. He says, "So what's bothering you, dear?" She says, "Oh, Father, I've got terrible news. My husband passed away last night." The priest says, "Oh, Mary, that's terrible. Tell me, Mary, did he have any last requests?" She says, "That he did, Father..." The priest says, "What did he ask, Mary?" She says, "He said, 'Please, Mary, put down that gun...'" ----------- Sally and Harry have been married for 50 years and are being interviewed by a reporter from the local newspaper. "So, Sally," asks the reporter, "I know today is your golden wedding anniversary, how old, exactly, are you?" "I am 78 years old," replies Sally proudly. "And I hope I live to be 100." "Well I hope your wish comes true," says the reporter. He then turned to Harry and asked, "And how old are you, Harry?" "I'm also 78 years old," replies Harry, "and, please God, I should live to be 101." "But why," asked the reporter, "would you want to live one year longer than your wife?" "Well, to tell you the truth," replies Harry, "I would like to have at least one year of peace and quiet." --------- >Signs Of The Times: Sign in a Laundromat: AUTOMATIC WASHING MACHINES: PLEASE REMOVE ALL YOUR CLOTHES WHEN THE LIGHT GOES OUT In an office: WOULD THE PERSON WHO TOOK THE STEP LADDER YESTERDAY PLEASE BRING IT BACK OR FURTHER STEPS WILL BE TAKEN Outside a farm: HORSE MANURE 50p PER PRE-PACKED BAG 20p DO-IT-YOURSELF In an office: AFTER TEA BREAK STAFF SHOULD EMPTY THE TEAPOT AND STAND UPSIDE DOWN ON THE DRAINING BOARD On a church door: THIS IS THE GATE OF HEAVEN. ENTER YE ALL BY THIS DOOR. THIS DOOR IS KEPT LOCKED BECAUSE OF THE DRAFT. (PLEASE USE SIDE DOOR.) English sign in a German cafe: MOTHERS, PLEASE WASH YOUR HANS BEFORE EATING Outside a secondhand shop: WE EXCHANGE ANYTHING - BICYCLES, WASHING MACHINES ETC. WHY NOT BRING YOUR WIFE ALONG AND GET A WONDERFUL BARGAIN? Notice in health food shop window: CLOSED DUE TO ILLNESS Spotted in a safari park: ELEPHANTS PLEASE STAY IN YOUR CAR Seen during a conference: FOR ANYONE WHO HAS CHILDREN AND DOESN'T KNOW IT, THERE IS A DAY CARE ON THE FIRST FLOOR Message on a leaflet: IF YOU CANNOT READ, THIS LEAFLET WILL TELL YOU HOW TO GET LESSONS Sign on a repair shop door: WE CAN REPAIR ANYTHING. (PLEASE KNOCK HARD ON THE DOOR - THE BELL DOESN'T WORK) Spotted in a toilet in a London office block: TOILET OUT OF ORDER. PLEASE USE FLOOR BELOW -------- >CHILDREARING Q&A Q. Should I have a baby after 35? A. No, 35 children is enough. Q. I'm two months pregnant now. When will my baby move? A. With any luck, right after he finishes college. Q. How will I know if my vomiting is morning sickness or the flu? A. If it's the flu, you'll get better. Q. What is the most common pregnancy craving? A.. For men to be the ones who get pregnant. Q. What is the most reliable method to determine a baby's sex? A. Childbirth. Q. My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that sometimes she's borderline irrational. A. So what's your question? Q. How long is the average woman in labor? A. Whatever she says divided by two. Q. My childbirth instructor says it's not pain I'll feel during labor, but pressure. Is she right? A. Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air current. Q. When is the best time to get an epidural? A. Right after you find out you're pregnant. Q. Is there any reason I have to be in the delivery room while my wife is in labor? A. Not unless the word "alimony" means anything to you. Q. Is there anything I should avoid while recovering from childbirth? A. Yes, pregnancy. Q. Does pregnancy cause headaches? A. Pregnancy causes anything you want to blame it for. Q. Do I have to have a baby shower? A. Not if you change the baby's diaper very quickly. Q. Our baby was born last week. When will my wife begin to feel and act normal again? A. When the kids are in college. ------------ This fellow who had spent his whole life in the desert comes to visit a friend. He'd never seen a train or the tracks they run on. While standing in the middle of the railroad tracks one day, he hears the whistle, "Whooee Whoee!" but doesn't know what it is. Predictably, he's hit -- but only a glancing blow -- and is thrown, to the side of the tracks, with some minor internal injuries, a few broken bones, and some bruises. After weeks in the hospital recovering, he's at his friend's house attending a party one evening. While in the kitchen, he suddenly hears the teakettle whistling. He grabs a baseball bat from the nearby closet and proceeds to batter and bash the tea kettle into an unrecognizable lump of metal. His friend, hearing the ruckus, rushes into the kitchen, sees what's happened, and asks the man from the desert, "Why did you ruin my good tea kettle?" The desert man replies, "Man, you gotta kill these things when they're small!" ----------------- One night at the dinner table, she commented, "When we were first married, you took the small piece of steak and gave me the larger. Now you take the large one and leave me the smaller. You don't love me any more?" "Nonsense, darling," he replied, "you just cook better now." ----------------- As she sat by him, he whispered, eyes full of tears, "You know what? You have been with me all through the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to support me. When my business failed, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you stayed right here. When my health started failing, you were still by my side... You know what Martha?" "What dear?" she gently asked, smiling as her heart began to fill with warmth. "I'm beginning to think you're bad luck." ------------ A Virginia State trooper pulled a car over on I-64 about 2 miles south of the Virginia/ West Virginia Stateline. When the trooper asked the driver why he was speeding, the driver said he was a Magician and Juggler and was on his way to Beckley WV to do a show at the Shrine Circus. He didn't want to be late. The trooper told the driver he was fascinated by juggling and said if the driver would do a little juggling for him then he wouldn't give him a ticket. He told the trooper he had sent his equipment ahead and didn't have anything to juggle. The trooper said he had some flares in the trunk and asked if he could juggle them. The juggler said he could, so the trooper got 5 flares, lit them and handed them to him. While the man was juggling, a car pulled in behind the patrol car. A drunken good old boy from West Virginia got out, watched the performance, then went over to the patrol car, opened the rear door and got in. The trooper observed him and went over to the patrol car, opened the door asking the drunk what he thought he was doing. The drunk replied, "You might as well take my butt to jail, cause there ain't no way I can pass that test." --------------- When I was young my intent was to go to medical school, but I was confused by the entrance exam. The deciding question was, "Re-arrange the letters P N E S I to spell out an important part of the human body that is more useful when erect." Those who spelled SPINE became doctors. The rest are in Congress. --------------- A blonde man shouts frantically into the phone "My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart!" "Is this her first child?" asks the Doctor. "No!" he shouts, "this is her husband!" --------------- A man stopped at a local gas station and after filling his tank, he paid the bill and bought a soft drink. He stood by his car to drink his cola and watched a couple of men working along the roadside. One man would dig a hole two or three feet deep and then move on. The other man came along behind him and filled in the hole. While one was digging a new hole, the other was 25 feet behind filling in the hole. The men worked right past the guy with the soft drink and went on down the road. "I can't stand this," said the man tossing the can into a recycle container and heading down the road toward the men. "Hold it, hold it," he said to the men. "Can you tell me what's going on here with all this digging and refilling?" "Well, we work for the government and we're just doing our job," one of the men said. "But one of you is digging a hole and the other fills it up. You're not accomplishing anything. Aren't you wasting the taxpayers' money?" "You don't understand, mister," one of the men said, leaning on his shovel and wiping his brow. "Normally there's three of us: me, Greg and Matt. I dig the hole, Greg sticks in the tree, and Matt here puts the dirt back. Greg's job's been cut so now it's just me an' Matt." --- ...LOL! Lots of good ones! Thanks LouiseA! ================================================================= >-->In The Worldly News: >From BizarreNews: I felt a great disturbance; as if a thousand fan boys screamed out at once and were suddenly silenced. At least that is what I imagine it was like when a Montana television station's regular programming was interrupted by news of a zombie apocalypse. The Montana Television Network says hackers broke into the Emergency Alert System of Great Falls affiliate KRTV. KRTV says on its website the hackers broadcast that, 'dead bodies are rising from their graves' in several Montana counties. The alert claimed the bodies were 'attacking the living' and warned people not to 'approach or apprehend these bodies as they are extremely dangerous.' I can just picture thousands of single, 30-year-old virgins in the Great Falls area scouring their parents' basement for their replica 'Highlander' swords in anticipation of decapitating some walking dead, and then sinking into a depression of disappointment when the network said there was no emergency. The station's engineers are investigating and the hoax alert has not generated any calls to police. *-- Ear lobe bitten off in brawl --* STAMFORD, Conn. - A man's ear lobe was bitten off and swallowed by his cousin during a brawl over loud music in Stamford, Conn., police said. Emilio Mendoza, 27, was charged with first-degree assault, interfering with police, forgery and disorderly conduct. After he was released from a hospital, the injured man Ruiz Clemente-Perez, 39, was charged with third-degree assault, police records said. Police were called to the apartment of Mendoza and Clemente- Perez early Monday morning. Clemente-Perez told police his cousin, Mendoza, began playing loud music, which started a fight. "It was a pretty bloody scene," said police Lt. Diedrich Hohn. Mendoza bit the left ear of Clemente-Perez and tore off the ear lobe, Holm said. Sgt. Richard Barbagallo said Mendoza, who was intoxicated at the time, told him he swallowed the ear lobe. Mendoza also showed the police fake identification when he was taken to police headquarters Monday, the Stamford Advocate reported. Mendoza is scheduled to be arraigned Wednesday. *-- Taiwan zoo to dissect poop as attraction --* TAIPEI, Taiwan - Zoo officials in Taiwan are turning to an odd point of interest to draw visitors during the winter season: animal poop. The Taipei Zoo, seeking to capitalize on renewed interest in animals after the release of the 3-D movie "Life of Pi," directed by Taiwanese-born film- maker Ang Lee, said it will dissect and explain the contents of animal poop three times per week for any zoo visitors interested in the smelly demonstration. The movie depicts a young Hindu boy who survives a shipwreck and is stranded on a lifeboat for 227 days. Several animals join him on the surrealist journey. As for how that translates into dissecting poop, zoo officials explained the display has a pointed demographic similar to the movie, Central News Agency said Sunday. "Somehow the poo topic is very stimulating for boys from 5 to 9 years old. They could be our target audience during winter vacation," project manager Lin Jun-lan said. *-- Woman's hand stuck in glove box --* STOCKPORT, England - British firefighters said they were called to a woman's home to free her hand from the glove compartment of her car. Stuart Hall, crew manager of the Stockport, England, fire crew, said firefighters were called to the 49-year-old woman's home when her hand became stuck in the glove box while she was attempting to retrieve something, The Mirror reported Monday. "She wasn't able to move her hand -- either to push it in or pull it out," Hall said. "There was a man there with her and he tried for a long time to no avail so they had no other option but to call us." The firefighters freed the woman by first removing her wristwatch., the newspaper said. "As soon as the watch came off it was fine; they were a little embarrassed as we were a last resort," Hall said. "But if someone is stuck they are stuck, they can't stay there all night. We don't train for something exactly like this but we will always be able get people free somehow." The woman suffered slight bruising and soreness in her wrist, Hall said. *-- Long-distance runner retires at age 101 --* HONG KONG - A 101-year-old man who has been in nine marathons since taking up distance running when he was 89 said he retired after a weekend race in Hong Kong. Fauja Singh, whose running and style of dress earned him the title "Turbaned Tornado," said Sunday's 6.2-mile race was his final competitive run, CNN reported Monday. Singh said he completed the Hong Kong event in 32 minutes and 28 seconds, shaving 4 minutes off his time from last year. "Five or six kilometers into the race, I really decided to go for it," he said. "I had lots of power today because I was very happy." Singh said he moved from India to Britain following the death of his son and began running marathons in 2000. He became the first centenarian to complete a marathon when he ran the Toronto Waterfront Marathon in 8 hours, 11 minutes and 6 seconds in 2011. "It's because of the happiness I get out of it. If something makes you happy, you'll do it well," Singh said. ================================================================ .--. .--. (_ _) "SICK" (_ _) I CANNOT GO TO SCHOOL TODAY )( -by Shel Silverstein )( Said little Peggy Ann McKay. /__\ /__\ [____] __,--"""""""--,__ [____] "I have the measles and the mumps, ) ( _/ \_ ) ( A gash, a rash, and purple bumps. \__/ / ((((((()))) \ \__/ My mouth is wet, my throat is dry, [ _]/ (((((((())))))) \[ ] I'm going blind in my right eye. [(_`"-._((((((( ))))))--"`_) ] [ ) (((( ,_ _, )))) ( ] My tonsils are as big as rocks, [ / (() |*| |*| (() \ ] I've counted sixteen chicken pox. [/ ()) ''' ''' ()) \ ] And there's one more- ( (() '' ^ '' (() )] ...that's seventeen! [ ())'. C====O.'()) / ] And don't you think [(\_/) (() '-._____.-' (()( ( ] ...my face looks green? ./o o\())____/ \____())____) . :(= Y =)@-----'---`-----@--------: My leg is cut, my eyes are blue- |/`----'/|\ /|\ \It might be instamatic flu. |``________________________________ I cough and sneeze and gasp and choke | |\'.'''.'''.".'.'".'..'".'.'.'."" I'm sure that my left leg is broke. | |'\.'"..'...."'"'..'...'.'.'.'.'..'.\ | |.'\.''.'...'''"'..'..'.'.'.'..'. My hip hurts when I move my chin, | |.'.\.'"..'.'."".'".'..'.'.".'.'. My belly button's caving in, | |.'.'\'.".'.".'.".''.'".'.'".'.'. My back is wrenched, | |.".'.\'.'..'.".'.'.-".'.'.'.- '.' ...my ankle's sprained, | |.'.' .\'.'.''.''.''.''.'.'.''.'' My 'pendix pains each time it rains. | |'.'.' .\'".'.-".'.''".''.-'".'.'.'.".'.'.'.\ \ |.'.'." .\".'.'-'.'".'..'.'.'.'.' My nose is cold, my toes are numb, \|.'.'..".'\".'.''.'..".'.''-'''.' I have a sliver in my thumb. \'.'.'.''.'\.'.''.'..'".'.'..'.'. My neck is stiff, my spine is weak. \.'.'.'".'.\'.'".'.'.'".'.".".'. I hardly whisper when I speak. \'".'.".".'\".'.'.".'.'-".'.".'.'.'."."-".'.'.'\ \.'.".'.".'\'.'.".'-'.''.'.'.'.'.'.".'.'.".'.'.\ \'.'.'".".'\'.'.".'.-''".".'. My tongue is filling up my mouth, \'.".'.'.".\'.'.'.'.".'.'.'. I think my hair is falling out. \".'.".'.".\".'-".." .".'.' My elbow's bent- \ \'.".''.".'\".'.'." .'.' ". ...my spine ain't straight. \".'.-'.".'\.'.'- .'.".'. My temperature is one-o-eight. \".".'.'.'|~.-~~-.~~-~.'~-~-.-'~-~..~~'-~-~-~-~| \'.'.''.'|.".'.'..-'.'. My brain is shrunk, I cannot hear, \".'..".|".''.''.'.".' There is a hole inside my ear. \'.".'.|".''..'.'.'.' I have a hangnail, and my heart is- \".'.'|".-.'..'..-'.' ...WHAT? \'.'.|.'.'.-'.'.'.".'..'".'.'.".'.'.".'"..| \'.'|'.'.".'.'..'. What's that? What's that you say? \.'|".''.'-'.'.'. You say today is...Saturday? \'|.-.'-'.-".'." G'bye, I'm going out to play!" \|jgs''.'.'.'.'.'-'.'".'.'.'".'.'.'.'"| ~~~~`~~~`~~~``~~~~```~~~~~`~~~~`~~~~~ >-->Ten Common Full-Time Employee Illness 1. The Macy's One Day Sale Flu. 2. The Drivers License Renewal Appointment 24-Hour Virus. 3. The Friday-Afternoon-Start-The-Weekend-Early Sudden Unbearable Stomach Pains. 4. The I'm Looking for a New Job and I Don't Know How Long It's Going to Take, but I Want To Stay On The Payroll Until Then Mysterious Infection. 5. The My Boyfriend's Got the Week Off So Suddenly I'm Too Contagious To Come In To The Office Disease. 6. The I Need a Hair Cut and My Stylist Doesn't Make Evening Appointments Bout of Influenza. 7. The There's No Federal Holidays for Two Months and I Want a Day Off Sickness. 8. The It's Spring Break and I Want To Pretend I'm a Teenager Again General Ailment. 9. The I've Messed Up Royally and I Won't Come In To Face the Music Terminal Illness. 10. The I Really Am Sick and I've Got The Doctor's Bills and the Completed Medical Expense Reimbursement Forms to Prove It Infirmity. ========================================================== >-->From Our Friend Geniann :) _.---.( ..--._) (_.' `''-.'` `'. / / \_) (_| _,.-'""'-,-'""'-.,_ | \ /.--' '--.\ /_) ,__\ ) (_(_( )_)_) ) /__, \ (_, ( o) ( o) / / `--.-` '-' c '-' `-'-` (O\ (O) '-.....__w__.....-' .-' '-. >Mary's checkbook Tired of having to balance his wife Mary's checkbook, Dave made a deal with her, he would only look at it after she had spent a few hours trying to get it into shape. Only then would he lend his expertise. The following night, after spending hours poring over the figures, Mary said, "There! I did it! I made it balance!" Dave was impressed and came over to take a look. "Let's see ... mortgage, seven hundred dollars; Electricity, sixty-four dollars and twelve cents; Telephone, thirty-eight dollars and seventy-three cents..." His brow wrinkled as he read the last entry. "It says here ESP, six hundred and forty-four dollars. What is that?" "Oh," she said, "that means `Error Some Place'." ----------- >Hospital A recent article in the Kentucky Post reported that a woman,one Anne Maynard has sued St Lukes hospital, saying that after her husband was treated there recently, he had lost all interest in sex. A hospital spokesman replied, “Mr Maynard was actually admitted in Ophthalmology - all we did was correct his eyesight.” ------------ .===. _ _ / _/\ \ / )%.===.%( \ \/6.6\/ | // ,,, \\ | ( _ ) \/ \/6.6\/ \/ .===. _)---(_ /\ ( _ ) /\ / ,,, \ / `~` \ ^^ /()-()\ ^^ ( /6.6\ ) /\/ \/\ / /o o\ \ )( _ )( \ | | / (._\ Y /_.) (_/;---;\_) \|_____|/ (O_`&`_O) / `"*"` \ | L | / / \ \ ( (_.@._) ) |__|__| / ()/^\() \ /'._\|/_.'\ | | | /. . . . . . .\ /. . . . . .\ |_|_| `"`"`|`|`|`"`"` `"`"|"|"|"`"` jgs _|_|_|_ _|_|_|_ _|_|_|_ (___|___) (___|___) (___|___) >Out of the mouth of babes! While I sat in the reception area of my doctor's office, a woman rolled an elderly man in a wheelchair into the room. As she went to the receptionist's desk, the man sat there, alone and silent. Just as I was thinking I should make small talk with him, a little boy slipped off his mother's lap and walked over to the wheelchair. Placing his hand on the man's, he said, I know how you feel. My Mom makes me ride in the stroller too..' -<>- As I was nursing my baby, my cousin's six-year-old daughter, Krissy, came into the room. Never having seen anyone breast feed before, she was intrigued and full of all kinds of questions about what I was doing. After mulling over my answers, she remarked, 'My mom has some of those, but I don't think she knows how to use them..' -<>- Out bicycling one day with my eight-year-old Granddaughter, Carolyn, I got a little wistful. 'In ten years,' I said, 'you'll want to be with your friends and you won't go walking, biking, and swimming with me like you do now. Carolyn shrugged. 'In ten years you'll be too old to do all those things anyway.' -<>- Working as a pediatric nurse, I had the difficult assignment of giving immunization shots to children...One day, I entered the examining room to give four-year-old Lizzie her needle. 'No, no, no!' she screamed. 'Lizzie,' scolded her mother, 'that's not polite behavior.' With that, the girl yelled even louder, 'No, thank you! No, thank you! -<>- On the way back from a Cub Scout meeting, my grandson innocently said to my son, 'Dad, I know babies come from mommies' tummies, but how do they get there in the first place?' After my son hemmed and hawed awhile, my grandson finally spoke up in disgust, 'You don't have to make up something, Dad. It's okay if you don't know the answer.' -<>- Just before I was deployed to Iraq, I sat my eight-year-old son down and broke the news to him. 'I'm going to be away for a long time,' I told him. 'I'm going to Iraq ..' 'Why?' he asked. 'Don't you know there's a war going on over there?' -<>- Paul Newman founded the Hole in the Wall Gang Camp for children stricken with cancer, AIDS, and blood diseases. One afternoon, he and is wife, Joanne Woodward, stopped by to have lunch with the kids. A counselor at a nearby table, suspecting the young patients wouldn't know Newman was a famous movie star, explained, that's the man who made this camp possible. Maybe you've seen his picture on his salad dressing bottle?' Blank stares. 'Well, you've probably seen his face on his lemonade carton.' An eight-year-old girl perked up. 'How long was he missing?' ... And my personal favorite ..God's Problem Now: His wife's graveside service was just barely finished, when there was a massive clap of thunder, followed by a tremendous bolt of lightning, accompanied by even more thunder rumbling in the distance. The little, old man looked at the pastor and calmly said, "Well, she's there." A smile - is a sign of joy. A hug - is a sign of love. A laugh - is a sign of happiness. And a friend like me? - Well that's just a sign of good taste! PS: NEVER GROW A WISHBONE WHERE A BACKBONE OUGHT TO BE. --- ...LOL! Good Ones! Thanks Geniann! ========================================================== >-->From Our Friend Sharon :) + \\^// ~~ 1 III ,o/ [#] (#) ,o/ III 1 _[#]__[#]__(#)_[_#_](_#_)_(#)__[#]__[#]_ ::::: ::::: ::::: ::::: 2 _ _ _ _ _ _ _ 2 _(#)__(#)__(#)__(#)_ _(#)__(#)__(#)_ ::::: ::::: ::::: ::::: 3::::: ::::: ::::: ::::: 3 ::::: ::::: ::::: ::::: ::::: ::::: ::::: ::::: 4 ::::: ::::: _ ::::: :::::4 ::::: :::::_(#)_::::: ::::: ::::: ::::: ::::: ::::: 5::::: ::::: ::::: ::::: 5 ::::: ::::: ::::: ::::: ::::: ::::: ::::: ::::: 6 ::::: ::::: ::::: :::::6 ::::: ::::: ::::: ::::: ::::: ::::: ::::: ::::: 7 _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ 7 _(_)__(_)__(_)__(_)__(_)__(_)__(_)__(_)_ + \\^// 8 III ,o/ [ ] ( ) ,o/ III 8 _[_]__[_]__(_)_[___](___)_(_)__[_]__[_]_ H G F E D C B A unknown This was written by a black gentleman in Texas and is so funny. What a great sense of humor and creativity!!! >When U Black, U Black When I was born, I was BLACK, When I grew up, I was BLACK, When I went in the sun, I stayed BLACK, When I got cold, I was BLACK, When I was scared, I was BLACK, When I was sick, I was BLACK, And when I die, I'll still be BLACK. NOW, You 'white' folks... When you're born, you're PINK, When you grow-up, you're WHITE, When you go in the sun, you get RED, When you're cold, you turn BLUE, When you're scared, you're YELLOW, When you get sick, you're GREEN, When you bruise, you turn PURPLE, And when you die, you look GRAY. So who y'all be callin' COLORED Folks? --- ...Checkmate! LOL! Telling it like it is. Thanks Sharon! I heard Oprah say 'People Of Color' on her show before. ========================================================= >-->From Our Friend Johanna :) _.--._ \ ** / (<>) . ) ( . )\_.._/ /\ \_.._/( (*_<>_ _<>_*) )/ '' \ \/ / '' \( ' ) ( ' ( ) ) ( (<>) / ** \ /.-..-.\ There were two Catholic boys, Timothy Murphy and Antonio Secola, whose lives parallel each other in amazing ways. In the same year Timothy was born in Ireland , Antonio was born in Italy . Faithfully they attended parochial School from kindergarten through their senior year in high school. They took their vows to enter the priesthood early in college, and upon graduation, became priests. Their careers had come to amaze the world, but it was generally acknowledged that Antonio Secola was just a wee cut above Timothy Murphy in all respects. Their rise through the ranks of Bishop, Archbishop and finally Cardinal was swift to say the least, and the Catholic world knew that when the present Pope died, it would be one of the two who would become the next Pope. In time, the Pope did die, and the College of Cardinals went to work. In less time than anyone had expected, white smoke rose from the chimney and the world waited to see whom they had chosen. The world, Catholic, Protestant and secular, was surprised to learn that Timothy Murphy had been elected Pope! Antonio Secola was beyond surprise. He was devastated, because even with all of Timothy's gifts, Antonio knew he was just a bit better qualified. With gall that shocked the Cardinals, Antonio Secola asked for a private session with them in which he candidly asked, "Why Timothy?" After a long silence, an old Cardinal took pity on the bewildered man and rose to reply. "We knew you were the better of the two, but we just could not bear the thought of the leader of the Roman Catholic Church being called POPE SE-COLA! --- __ .' '\._ \ @ /; __ ;::'--':;. _ .' '. :;:: _.'._ \ @ / ;;.-:/ | \:.'--; :___......._ '. {{__..--""-,_'-.: {{[_ _ _ _ _'--.} ___ ____ {[| | || || | |-.]} /\ ___ | \ ___ / \ | {[\-'-':-::-:-'/ ]} / \ | \ |___/ | \ | __ | | | {[ \ \ _\_/ / ~]} /----\ |___/ | \ |___/ | \ |__| | {{[\ .-' '-./]}} / \ | \ | \ | \ \___/ | | ( ) {[.:-"'\ /'"-'.]} | \ | \ | | {[' __/ \__ :]} {[::' _) (_ ' :]} {{[: : ] [ : :]} {[: : ( ) :]}} {{[: : '-' :]} [ : :_.:';. :]} {{[_.' _ _ _ '-._]} {|\\|~|_|_|_|~| ] } jim{{ '""''~~~""-- _' ''""""""""""""'' . | . -:--|--:- ' | ' _|_ | | \ / / \ ...ARGH! LOL! Thanks Johanna! =============================================================== >-->From CleanLaffs: _......._ .-'.'.'.'.'.'.`-. .'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.'.`. /.'.' '.\ |.' _.--...--._ | \ `._.-.....-._.' / | _..- .-. -.._ | .-.' `. ((@)) .' '.-. CleanLaffs aways makes me ( ^ \ `--. .-' / ^ ) \ / . . \ / S M I L E ! / .' '. .- \ ( _.\ \ (_`-._.-'_) /._\) `-' \ ' .--. / `-' | / /|_| `-._.'\ | | | |_| | /-.._ _..-\ `.--.______.' | \ ..... | `. .' `. / \ .' LGB `-..___..-` Taking advantage of a balmy day in New York, a priest and three other men of the cloth swapped their clerical garb for polos and khakis and time out on the golf course. After several really horrible shots, their caddy asked, "You guys wouldn't be priests by any chance?" "Actually, yes, we are," one cleric replied. "How did you know?" "Easy," said the caddy, "I've never seen such bad golf and such clean language!" -<>- A Sunday school teacher was teaching her class about the difference between right and wrong. "All right children, let's take another example," she said. "If I were to get into a man's pocket and take his billfold with all his money, what would I be?" Little Johnny raises his hand, and with a confident smile he blurts out, "You'd be his wife!" -<>- After many years of faithful duty with the US Forest Service, their beloved fire prevention mascot was unceremoniously "re- tired." Still in the prime of his life and bearing one of the world's most recognizable faces, he quickly found work as a spokesman for the world's leading exporter of diamonds. He's now working as "Smokey DeBeers." -<>- It was the day after Christmas at a church in San Francisco. The pastor of the church was looking over the cradle when he noticed that the baby Jesus was missing from among the figures. Immediately he turned and went outside and saw a little boy with a red wagon, and in the wagon was the figure of the little infant, Jesus. So he walked up to the boy and said, "Well, where did you get Him, my little friend?" The little boy replied, "I got him from the church." "And why did you take him?" The boy said, "Well, about a week before Christmas I prayed to the little Lord Jesus and I told him if he would bring me a red wagon for Christmas I would give him a ride around the block in it. -<>- My husband had reluctantly agreed to come shopping with me. But when he found himself stuck in a lingerie shop while I tried on one garment after another, he regretted his decision. Impatient and bored he asked a salesclerk, "Is there anything in the store for men?" "Sir," she said, "everything in this store is for men." [Reader's Digest.] -<>- The other day while driving home, after beng delayed at my office, I suddenly saw flashing lights in my rearview mirror. The police officer pulled me over for speeding. Hoping for a little leniency I explained to him that I was rushing home to be with my wife on our first anniversary. But rather than letting me off with just a warning, he went ahead and wrote out the ticket, handed it to me, and said, "Congratulations! The first year is paper, right?" -<>- A few years ago a refugee from Laos came to the US in one of the resettlement influxes. He had been an announcer in radio back in Laos, and he wanted to get into the same line of work here. The first thing he did was join AFTRA (American Federation of Television and Radio Announcers). He tried to pursue a job, but of course, he had problems with the English language, being a new resident. In order to keep body and soul together while going to English classes, he took up barbering. Soon, he became a very good barber, giving haircuts, stylings, and shaves. He seemed to be an artist with the straight razor. In fact, the shop where he worked made him specialize in giving shaves. Thus, he became known as an AFTRA shave Laotian. -<>- The bride was anything but a tidy housekeeper. It didn't bother her much until one evening when her husband called from the hall, somewhat dismayed: "Honey, what happened to the dust on this table? I had a phone number written on it." -<>- During his freshman year, my son Steve couldn't get home for Christmas. So he sent me a set of inexpensive cuff links and a note reading: "Dear Dad, This is not much, but it's all you could afford." ========================================================= *\o_ _c/* / * * \ <\ *\o/* /> ) c/* / > *\o <\ /> __o */\ /\* c__ * /> <\ * /\* __o_ _c__ */\ * / * * \ * <\ /> *\c/* ejm97 __)__ >-->From TheMouth: >Do you recognize these well known adages? (Answers below). 1. All articles that coruscate with resplendence are not truly auriferous. 2. Sorting on the part of mendicants must be interdicted. 3. A revolving lithic conglomerate accumulates no congeries of small, green, biophytic plant. 4. Members of an avian species of identical plumage tend to congregate. 5. It is fruitless to become lachrymose of precipitately departed lacteal fluid. 6. It is fruitless to attempt to indoctrinate a super- annuated canine with innovative maneuvers. 7. Surveillance should precede saltation. 8. Individuals who make their abodes in vitreous edifices would be advised to refrain from catapulting petrious projectiles. 9. Where there are visible vapors having their provenance in ignited carbonaceous materials, there is conflagration. ------------------------------------------------------------- ANSWERS: 1. All that Glitters is not Gold. 2. Beggars cannot be choosers. 3. A Rolling Stone gathers no Moss. 4. Birds of a feather flock together. 5. Don't cry over Spilt Milk. 6. You cant teach an Old Dog new Tricks. 7. Look before you leap. 8. Those who live Glass Houses should cast no stones. 9. Where there is smoke, there will be fire. -<>- >Top Ten Things I've Learned From Being An Accountant 10. When you know the right people at the post office, it can be April 15 whenever you want 9. White-Out and 7-Up — surprisingly refreshing 8. If you're confused by something on the tax form, just write "Huh?" 7. You do the taxes; don't let the taxes do you 6. People will pay you a lot of money if you pretend to know how the tax code works 5. The only thing more satisfying than getting a client a sizeable refund is the garlic shrimp scampi at Red Lobster 4. Numbers is hard 3. After completing tax returns for 12 straight hours, your calculator starts talking to you 2. Always put your clients first... unless you get an offer to go on Letterman 1. Women want me. Men want to be me. OR Visa Versa for woman accountants -<>- > Questions For Dad A father and son went fishing one day. While they were out in the boat, the boy suddenly became curious about the world around him. He asked his father, "How does this boat float? The father replied, "Don't rightly know son." A little later, the boy looked at his father and asked, "How do fish breath underwater?" Once again the father replied, "Don't rightly know son." A little later the boy asked his father, "Why is the sky blue?" Again, the father replied. "Don't rightly know son." Finally, the boy asked his father, "Dad, do you mind my asking you all of these questions?" The father replied, "Of course not, you don't ask questions, you never learn nothin'." -<>- _ _,-"" ""-._ ,-' `-. ,' `. ,' `. ,' `. / \ / Y O U D O N ' T K N O W \ / ___ \ : | /| / \ | / : : | / | | | / : : | /__| | |/\ : : | / | | | \ : : .__/ / | \___/ | \ : | | | | | ..::::::.. ..::::::.. | ,-. | .::"'____ """ """ ____`"::. | ,-. |\ \| .' `8P`-. .'`8P `. |/ /| |/\ | `-____-' : : `-___-' | /\| || \| : : |/ || ||_|| : : ||_|| 8888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888 888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888[dd]888 8888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888 >Top Ten Signs You Have A Lame Computer Virus 10. Computer occasionally emits the odor of steamed clams 9. Signs onto ebay as you; places several modest bids on Burt Reynolds memorabilia 8. Only music you can download is Kenny Loggins 7. Tech support guy says give your computer rest and plenty of fluids 6. Computer e-mails your friends catty comments about the size of your ass 5. MapQuest directions always lead you to a Cinnabon in Yonkers 4. No matter what book you order on Amazon, you get Artie Lange's "Too Fat to Fish" 3. When you hit the F7 key, your pants fall down 2. Only Web site you can access is for "The Slanket," the blanket with sleeves 1. Replaces hilarious Top Ten jokes with entries that aren't funny ======================================================= >-->FUN Places To Net Visit :) Texas Rules Of Etiquette http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/texas.html Rules For US Citizens http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/rules.html Woman - Darkest Before Dawn http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/womandbd.html Freaky Art Vans http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/artvan.html In The Wild With Brendon Cremer http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/inthewild.html Sandy's Can Cars http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/cancars.html Amazing Homes Around The World http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/ahouse.html -<>- >From our friend Linda :) She sent us one we have here... True Duck Tale http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/duck.html">True Duck Tale --- ...Love this one! Thanks Linda! -<>- >From our friend Johanna :) ROME - Since his owner died two months ago, Tommy the dog has not missed a single mass in the small church in southern Italy where his mistress's funeral was held, Italian media said Wednesday. View all images and side notes here: http://tinyurl.com/ba4tnhl --- ...Aww, so sweet! Thanks Johanna! Alpine Coaster with no brakes! Jaw dropping, high-speed, brakeless journey down the mountain. Austrian downhill coaster is nevertheless terrifying.” The coaster located Mieders, Austria, starts at the top of a mountain, reachable by a cable car. It’s pretty simple: single pipe, single person, single giant sloping, winding hill. But throw hundreds of pine trees whizzing past you on tight bank curves and it gets a bit scarier. Oh, and try not to clutch the brake — that’s right no brake. http://zanylol.com/coaster.html --- ...Scary! Thanks Johanna! ========================================================= >-->Quotes & Thunkers: "One day one of my little nephews came up to me and asked me if the equator was a real line that went around the Earth, or just an imaginary one. I had to laugh. Laugh and laugh. Because I didn't know, and I thought that maybe by laughing he would forget what he asked me." --Jack Handy "You can buy anything on eBay. I just bought the world's oldest globe. It's flat." --Buzz Nutley "A good rule of thumb is if you've made it to thirty-five and your job still requires you to wear a name tag, you've made a serious vocational error." --Dennis Miller "Did you hear about this guy in Maine? He was driving a truck, but naked. He drove through three towns naked, in the wrong direction, and was speeding before crashing into a police car. Driving naked, the wrong way and speeding. Basically, this guy is me without a show." -Dave Letterman "He uses all those Texas expressions. He said 'He'd leave when the kettle starts whistling at the frying pan.' What does that mean?" --Jay Leno "Do not worry about your difficulties in Mathematics. I can assure you mine are still greater." - Albert Einstein "We don't have user-centricity. Until we understand context, which is way beyond presence--presence is the most trivial notion of context." --Bill Gates attempting to explain his company's .net initiative. --- ...Hey! I understand this! Sad, huh? LOL! :) >Updated FUN STUFF URLS - Oh Yeah :) Shangy! ------------------------------------------------------------------------- http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/urls.html FUN URLS ------------------------------------------------------------------------- -->BECOMING A CHRISTIAN HOW TO BE A CHRISTIAN! ------------------------------------------------------------------------- -->FULL LENGTH - FREE On line AUDIO MP3 Christian Foundational Class http://www.truthortradition.com/modules.php?name=News&file=article&sid=61 NEW LIFE IN CHRIST! ------------------------------------------------------------------------- -->This is for all you who love food andd DARE to make it at home Yep. You guessed it - Recipes. These are Tried and True, Yummy to the Tummy, good old fashioned home cooking recipes that are EASY to do :) Visit Shangy's Easy-Does-It Home Recipes: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/easy.html Home Recipes >Got A good Recipe? SHARE IT HERE: Share A Recipe ************************************************************************ >TO SUBSCRIBE: Visit Here This Weeks regular Shangy emails OR For the Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com ************************************************************************