The Difference Is Clear And More... :) Shangy! >Here are the details on our Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com To UnSubscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com Group home page: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ShangyFunList or Web Site: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/ShangyFunList.html Group email address: ShangyFunList@yahoogroups.com or email me here: bcrsystems@earthlink.net ================ *~* A REMINDER: PLEASE Send me sweet, interesting, funny, inspiring, family type forwards ANY TIME here... bcrsystems@earthlink.net I Need them, Love them, Use them, and Share them! THANK YOU!! AND For Facebook Users: Please Friend Me / Like Me here... http://tinyurl.com/cma6all AND For Google Plus Users: You can find me here... Shangy Bigham https://plus.google.com/106648555948034085752/posts AND Please Share This email with All Your Friends And Family! ^~^ May God SUPER BLESS You As You Do! THANK YOU! :) -<>- * NOTE: An easy way to adjust the size of print in email or any page is to hold down the Ctrl tab while moving the scroll button on the mouse. You can also use the keyboard to change the font size in your web browser or emails. Hold down the Ctrl key while pressing the + key for larger text or the - key for smaller text! ================ >-->In The 'Shangy' News :) ____ || | ||___| _)__<__ _ _ |____|__|:|___|:|_ | |_.---._|___| _ | o| | | |_o_| | || |/| |\| | |_||____|`\___/'|___| V _/-\_ fsc I've been continuing to work hard on reducing large images so that the web site pages load up to 3 times faster. Along with that I have been sprucing up pages and dividing large pages into two pages so those with iphones or other such devices will have less wait time loading them. I'm pretty sure I've got 2016 and now 2015 totally done. I haven't been sticking strictly to editing only by the year and have skipped around quite a bit trying to get the Fall and Halloween pages done as well as many linking pages. It's a process but I am making some good progress. :) >3 HOT Off The 'Shangy' Press :) Our first red hot page is from our friend LouiseAu. It is one that rather was astonishing to me. It always amazed me what the Egyptians did to try and secure their afterlife kings for their blessings. However, this page shows me that the Egyptians were not the only ones with such fanciful notions - China had them as well. Check out this amazing one here... ,(\_/) ((((^`\ (((( (6 \ ((((( , \ ,,,_ ((((( /"._ ,`, ((((\\ ,... (((( / `-.-' ))) ;' `"'"'"(((( ( ((( / ((( \ )) | | (( | . ' | )) \ _ ' `\ ,.'Y ( | y;---,-""'"-.\ \/ ) / ./ ) / `\ \ |./ ( ( / /' || \\ //'| jgs || \\ _// || || )) |_/ || \_\ |_/ || `'" \_\ `'" Army Of Terracotta Cave http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/armyterracottacave.html --- ...Wow! Thank God we have Jesus Christ! Thanks LouiseAu! Our next 2 flaming hot new pages come from compiled forwards from our friends Linda, LouiseAu, Geniann and PatDeE. These are sure to give you your aww quota for the day! Check these our here... ___ ___ /_/\\___//\_\ //\_/\\ Ruff! \ \_/ / Clover Fernchild aka cf /| o |\ __/\/ | | | \/\__ (_____((_|_))_____) Dog-Tired Dogs http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/dogtired.html Dog-Tired Dogs 2 http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/dogtired2.html --- ...Awww! There are some sweet gems here! Thanks my Friends! -<>- _._ .' `. | | "=======" $ ^ ^ $ ` # ' `._.' _.'< ' >'-._ .' \ / ' / v \ / . .: . | . `' .: ` ' : ` :. `. : :. ` / \ : : < ) / \ : : : ` `*=---=* . / : ) | ' ` ) \` `.' :; | ( `\-. \( / |. \ ) ) ` ( `-' _Y- `'\' \ | )\ ) : ) \ : . \ ` | \ ` , ( : . :' \ \ ` | . \ : | ' ) \ \ : ) .' mb \ .' | | ( a:f \ (__| (__) \ .__.--..' ; | `-..--.--, \ +._____.-=__] [__.--===::-' *~* We Had A Super Month Of Caring And Sharing Last Month! Be sure to visit and share all these with your friends and family: CATtitude! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/cattitude.html Proud Of Our Troops 8! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/troops8.html World's Spectacular Places 4! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/spectacularplaces4.html World's Spectacular Places 5! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/spectacularplaces5.html Military Dogs! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/militarydogs.html Old Delivery Trucks! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/deliverytrucks.html Old Delivery Trucks 2! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/deliverytrucks2.html Beautiful Galapagos Islands! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/galapagos.html Beautiful Galapagos Islands 2! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/galapagos2.html Werribee Open Range Zoo! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/werribeezoo.html Farmers Gone Wild 2! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/farm2.html Farmers Gone Wild 3! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/farm3.html *~* May God Abundantly Bless All Our Thoughtful Contributors! ======================================================= >-->From SmileZilla: ____ \ \ _\___\_ / " _) ((\__-_\ / \\ /__| /\\ UUU / / | /,_/ |/|\ |__ /__\____\ gnv A Republican and a Democrat were walking down the street when they came to a homeless person. The Republican gave the homeless person his business card and told him to come to his business for a job. He then took twenty dollars out of his pocket and gave it to the homeless person. The Democrat was very impressed, and when they came to another homeless person, he decided to help. He walked over to the homeless person and gave him directions to the welfare office. He then reached into the Republican's pocket and gave the homeless person fifty dollars. Now you understand the difference between Republicans and Democrats. -<>- \ / __ \/ _ ---===##===---_________________________-------------- _ [ ~~~=================###=###=###=###=###=================~~ ] / || | |~\ ;;;; PKP ;;; ET22-689 ;;;; /~| | || \ /___||__| | \ ;;;; [_] ;;;; / | |__||___\ [\ |__| ;;;; ;;;; ;;;; ;;; ;;;; ;;;; ;;;; |__| /] (=| ____[-]_______________________________________[-]____Kraq|=) / /___/|#(__)=o########o=(__)#||___|#(__)=o#########o=(__)#|\___\ _________-=\__/=--=\__/=--=\__/=-_____-=\__/=--=\__/=--=\__/=-______ Lady: Is this my train? Station Master: No, it belongs to the Railway Company. Lady: Don't try to be funny. I mean to ask if I can take this train to Kuala Lumpur. Station Master: No Madam, I'm afraid it's too heavy. -<>- A woman brought an old picture of her dead husband, wearing a hat, to the photographer. She asked the photographer if he could remove the hat from the picture. He convinced her he could easily do that, and asked her what side of his head he parted his hair on. "I forget," she said. "But you can see that for yourself when you take off his hat." -<>- The professor for the college's Wills and Trusts course posed this question to the students: "Why do people choose to have their children, rather than their siblings, inherit their estate?" After students offered various theories, one fellow raised his hand. "This may be a bit off topic," he said, "but when I was little, when my brother and sister finished playing with me, they would put me into a drawer." ======================================================= +------------ BIZARRE HOLIDAYS ------------+ October 3 is Techies Day and Virus Appreciation Day October 4 is National Golf Day and National Frappe Day October 5 is Do Something Nice Day and World Teacher's Day October 6 is Mad Hatter Day and Physician Assistant Day October 7 is Bald and Free Day and World Smile Day October 8 is American Touch Tag Day October 9 is Curious Events Day, Fire Prevention Day, Leif Erikson Day and Moldy Cheese Day ======================================================= >-->From GoodCleanFun: _ .-. .--''` ) _ | |/` .-'` ( `\ /` _) _. -'._ /` .' .-.-; `).' / \ \ (`, \_o/_o/__ / .-''` ``'-. { /` ,___.--''` { ; '-. \ \ _ _ { |'-....-`'.\_\ / './ '. \ \ `"` _ \ \ | \ \ ( '-.J \_..----.._ __) `\--..__ .-` ` `\ ''--...--. (_,.--""`/` .- `\ .__ _) | ( } .__ _) \_, '. }_ - _.' \_, '. } `'--' '._. ,_) / | / .' \ | _ .-' \__/;--.||-' _|| _||__ __ _ __.-` "`)(` `" ```._) jgs (_`,- ,-' `''-. '-._) ( ( / '.__.' `"`'--' >Favorite Animal Our teacher asked us what our favorite animal was, and I said, "Fried chicken." She said I wasn't funny, but she couldn't have been right, everyone else in the class laughed. My parents told me to always be truthful and honest, and I am. Fried chicken is my favorite animal. I told my dad what happened, and he said my teacher was probably a member of PETA. He said they love animals very much. I do, too. Especially chicken, pork and beef. Anyway, my teacher sent me to the principal's office. I told him what happened, and he laughed too. Then he told me not to do it again. The next day in class my teacher asked me what my favorite "live" animal was. I told her it was chicken. She asked me why, just like she'd asked the other children. So I told her it was because you could make them into fried chicken. She sent me back to the principal's office again. He laughed, and told me not to do it again. I don't understand. My parents taught me to be honest, but my teacher doesn't like it when I am. Today, my teacher asked us to tell her what famous person we admire most. I told her, "Colonel Sanders." Guess where I am now... -<>- >Concert Program When my youngest daughter was three, she begged to be allowed to attend a concert with her older sister and brother. She assured me she was a big girl and would behave herself. As we took our seats in the orchestra hall, I handed programs to the kids. Following the lead of her older siblings, my three-year- old opened her program, and in her most grown-up voice said, "Mommy, I'll have the chicken, please..." -<>- >Dented Bumper Recently, my husband put his car in reverse and accidentally drove it into a wall. He took it to his mechanic, who replaced the dented bumper. A few days later, he did it again. "I'm so embarrassed," he moaned, reaching for the phone. "Why not tell him it was me this time?" I suggested. "Maybe I will," he said while dialing. "It worked the last time." -<>- >Man of the House Before he left on a business trip, my brother-in-law took his young son aside. He said, "I'm trusting you to take care of the family. You'll be the man of the house." Comprehending the gravity of the situation, the son said, "In that case I'm going to need the remote." -<>- >Spy Hunter The Irish Intelligence Agency loses track of one of its agents, so they call in their top spy hunter. The head of the Agency says, "All I can tell you is that his name is Murphy and that he's somewhere in Dublin. Once you think you've located him, say the code words, 'The weather forecast calls for mist in the morning.' If it's him, he'll answer, 'Yes, and for mist at noon as well.'" The spy hunter goes stops in a bar on the outskirts of Dublin. He says to the bartender, "Maybe you can help me. I'm looking for a fella named Murphy." The bartender says, "There's lots o' guys named Murphy around here. There's Murphy the baker, who runs the pastry shop on the next block, there's Murphy the banker, president of the savings bank, there's Murphy the blacksmith, who works at the stables, and, as a matter of fact, my name's Murphy, too." Since the guy's a Murphy, the spy hunter says to himself, "I'd better be tryin' the code words on this lad." He says, "The weather forecast calls for mist in the morning." "Oh, you're looking for Paddy Murphy the spy. He lives in the apartment above the butcher shop." ========================================================= >-->From Our Friend LouiseA :) .-. | | |=| |=| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | |=| jgs |=| |_| .=/I\=. ////V\\\\ |#######| ||||||||| ||||||||| ||||||||| >SMILES It was mid-October and I was waiting for my wife, Julie, at the checkout at Walmart supermarket in Worcester, Massachusetts, USA, I noticed that someone had left behind their broom. When no one came to claim it, I went outside to search for a couple I remembered seeing at the cashier's desk. I spotted them getting into their truck and hurried over. 'Excuse me,' I said to the young woman, 'but did you by any chance leave your broom inside?' 'No,' she retorted quickly and with a smile, 'we came by truck.' -------- My fellow firefighters and I are required to wear our full gear on all safety calls, even to advise homeowners of a county ordinance against burning leaves after dark. Last Halloween, two co-workers waited on the porch of one such offending household, helmets in hand, until a woman finally opened the door. Promptly dropping a candy bar into each helmet, she remarked, "You boys are a little old for this sort of thing, aren't you?" and closed the door. -------- My two daughters were having a discussion about family resemblance. "I look like Mom," said my nine-year-old, "but I have Dad's eyes and Dad's lips." The six-year-old said, "And I look just like Dad but I have light hair." Then she turned to me. "Mom," she asked, "what does Dad have to do with us being born, anyway?" Her older sister jumped right in, "Don't be stupid, Christina. Dad is the one who drove Mom to the hospital." -------- "Doctor, can you tell me what I can do to keep from getting pregnant?" "Why certainly, just eat peanut brittle." "I LOVE peanut brittle! Before or after?" "Neither before nor after -- instead of!" ---------- On my first trip to the West Coast, I was looking forward to sampling seafood from the Pacific. At a small open-air restaurant near San Francisco, I selected the clam chowder. "Is it fresh?" I asked the waitress. "Oh yes," she reassured me, "We opened the can just this morning." -------- "How was your golf game, dear?" asked Jack's wife Jill. "Well, I was hitting pretty well, but my eyesight's gotten so bad I couldn't see where the ball went." "But you're seventy-five years old, Jack!" admonished his wife, "Why don't you take my brother Peter along?" "But he's eighty-five and doesn't even play golf anymore," protested Jack. "But he's got perfect eyesight. He could watch your ball," Jill pointed out. The next day Jack teed off with Peter looking on. Jack swung, and the ball disappeared down the middle of the fairway. "Do you see it?" asked Jack. "Yup," Peter answered. "Well, where is it?" yelled Jack, peering off into the distance. "I forgot." ------- So this guy took his wife on a fishing trip, and she did everything wrong. First, she kept talking out loud; everybody know that scares the fish away! Then she used the wrong bait. And then she was reeling in the line too soon. But worst of all, she caught a lot more fish than he did! ------- Rhonda went to a pet shop and immediately spotted a large beautiful parrot. There was a sign on the cage that said $50.00. "Why so little?" she asked the pet store owner. The owner replied, "Look, I should tell you first that this bird used to live in a house of prostitution, and sometimes it says some pretty vulgar stuff." The woman thought about this, but decided she had to have the bird anyway. She took it home and hung the bird's cage up in her living room and waited for it to say something. The bird looked around the room, then at her, and said, "New house, new madam." The woman was a bit shocked at the implication, but then thought "That's not so bad." When her two teenage daughters returned from school the bird saw them and said, "New house, new madam, new girls." The girls and the woman were a bit offended but then began to laugh about the situation. Moments later, the woman's husband, Robert, came home from work. The bird looked at him and said, "Hi Robert." -------- A drunk was hanging on to a lamppost for support when an old lady walked by. She stopped and asked, "Why don't you take a bus home?" The drunk replied, "My wife would never let me keep it!" ------- I was sitting at a long stop light yesterday, minding my own business and patiently waiting for it to turn green, even though there was no on-coming traffic. A carload of bearded, young, loud men, shouting Anti-American slogans, with a half-burned American Flag duct-taped on the trunk of their car, and a 'Remember 9-11' slogan spray painted on the side, was stopped next to me. Suddenly they yelled, "Allah Akbar! Praise Allah! Death to America!" and took off before the light changed. Out of nowhere an 18-wheeler came speeding through the intersection and ran directly over their car, crushing it completely, killing everyone in it! For several minutes I sat in my car, thinking to myself, "Man... that could have been me!" Today, bright and early, I went out and got a job as a truck driver! --- ...Oh My! LOL! Thanks LouiseAu! ========================================================= >-->From Our Friend Geniann :) ________ /________\ //( ( ( ( \\ || ((|| ||) ) ` ) )|| || (\___( ( || \|) ) \)_|/ / ((\_v_/ \ / /) x \ \ | | x | | | \ x / | | | x | | | |\ x /| | | |/\ x /\| | | | \x/ | | | | V | | /____\ /____\ | | | | / \ / \ | | | | `~~| |~~' |\ /| | \ / | |___V___| | / \ | | / \ | |/ \| / \ / \ ______/ \_______ ============================ Alyssa >The Way Women Think Husband’s Text Message to wife: Honey, I got hit by a car outside the office. Paula brought me to the Hospital. Doctors presently doing tests and taking X-rays. Severe blow to my head but not likely to have any lasting effects. Wound required 19 stitches. I have three broken ribs, a broken arm and compound fracture in the left leg. Amputation of my right foot is a possibility. Love you. Wife’s Response: Who's Paula? -<>- _,---. (/_/)))) \c e_e) . \ = ) _| ,-` -(_ |o| / `-'\\ |#{) /__| ._ _)y / < \ (\_/ `.\ ____\ ,>>> | .==T=T==.__| | | / | |\ |_______| \ / /\ \ / ,' `. \ / / \ \ <\_\_ \ \ `---` (_`-\_ `---' hjw >THINGS I TRUST MORE THAN HILLARY CLINTON * Mexican tap water * A rattlesnake with a ‘pet me’ sign * OJ Simpson showing me his knife collection * A fart when I have diarrhea * An elevator ride with Ray Rice * Taking pills offered by Bill Cosby * Michael Jackson's Doctor * An Obama Nuclear deal with Iran * A Palestinian on a motorcycle * Gas station Sushi * A Jimmy Carter economic plan * Brian Williams news reports * Loch Ness monster sightings * Prayers for peace from Al Sharpton * An Obama endorsement -<>- /\ ( ;`~v/~~~ ;._ ,/'"/^) ' < o\ '".~'\\\--, ,/",/W u '`. ~ >,._.., )' ,/' w ,U^v ;//^)/')/^\;~)' ,/"'/ W` ^v W |; )/' ;'' | v' v`" W } \\ " .'\ v `v/^W,) '\)\.)\/) `\ ,/,)' ''')/^"-;' \ ". >The difference is clear: In CALIFORNIA The Governor of California is jogging with his dog along a nature trail. A coyote, hiding in the bushes, leaps out and attacks the Governor's dog, then bites the Governor. The Governor starts to intervene, but reflects upon the movie "Bambi" and then realizes he should stop because the coyote is only doing what is natural. He calls animal control. Animal Control captures the coyote and bills the state $200 testing it for diseases and $500 for relocating it. He calls a veterinarian. The vet collects the dead dog and bills the state $200 testing it for diseases. The Governor goes to hospital and spends $3,500 getting checked for diseases from the coyote and on getting his bite wound bandaged. The running trail gets shut down for 6 months while Fish & Game conducts a $100,000 survey to make sure the area is now free of dangerous animals. The Governor spends $50,000 in state funds implementing a "coyote awareness program" for residents of the area. The State legislature spends $2 million to study how to better treat rabies and how to permanently eradicate the disease throughout the world. The Governor's security agent is fired for not stopping the attack. The state spends $150,000 to hire and train a new agent with additional special training on the nature of coyotes. PETA protests the coyote's relocation and files a $5 million suit against the state. ,'-', :-----: (''' , - , ''') \ ' . , ` / \ ' ^ ? / \ ` - ,' `j_ _,' ,- -`\ \ /f ,- \_\/_/'- , `, , , /\ \ | / \ ', , f : :`, , <...\ , : ,- ' \,,,,\ ; : j ' \ \ :/^^^^' \ \ ; ''': \ -, -`.../ ' - -,`,--` \_._'-- '---: Storm In TEXAS The Governor of Texas is jogging with his dog along a nature trail. A coyote, hiding in the bushes, leaps out and attacks his dog. The Governor shoots the coyote with his state-issued pistol and keeps jogging. The Governor has spent $.50 on a .45 ACP hollow point cartridge. Buzzards eat the dead coyote. And that, my friends, is why California is broke and Texas is not. ======================================================= >-->In The Worldly News: Trey Gowdy Just Revealed Obama’s Biggest Failure [And Hillary's too!] http://tinyurl.com/jmale32 BOMB SHELL: Supreme Court Proves Hillary Wrong Clinton Wrong: Supreme Court Says ‘Stop-and-Frisk’ Is Constitutional http://tinyurl.com/ja7h75q Ivanka Trump Stars In New Ad Aimed At Working Mothers "... understands the needs of a modern workforce." http://tinyurl.com/hp4hu3r BREAKING: Comey Drops 3-Word Bombshell About Hillary Investigation... He’s Finished http://conservativetribune.com/comey-bombshell-hillary/ ‘Missing’ State Dept. Email Brings ANOTHER Clinton Family Member In Heat Of Scandal "Clinton truly left her mark on the State Department ..." http://tinyurl.com/z4474pt -<>- >From BizarreNews: Enemas have been around for centuries, as have hazing and alcohol, but leave it to the innovative members of University of Tennessee's Phi Kappa Alpha fraternity to combine them all. Now enemas have been around for a long time. In fact, they are still popular in certain circles for their therapeutic properties. Popular enema "recipes" include coffee, chamomile or green teas or even a dilution of lemon juice. Who am I to say what a person should or shouldn't squirt up his or her backside? However, alcohol is a different matter altogether since whatever is in the enema is absorbed straight into the bloodstream through the colon while bypassing the liver's filters. This important little datum was learned the hard way by 20-year-old Alexander Broughton who was admitted to UT Medical Center unconscious and unresponsive. He had a blood alcohol content level greater than 0.4, which is considered toxic and potentially deadly. Legal intoxication is 0.08. Investigators determined the incident happened at Phi Kappa Alpha's house on campus where they found several other people, including three men, still passed out the next morning. Investigators are working to determine if Broughton was assaulted or made the decision to engage in the behavior himself. UT suspended the Phi Kappa Alpha chapter for 30 days or until a decision is made about the chapter's future. The one thing the story didn't specify is what kind of alcohol was used for the enema. That really makes me wonder. What do you think would make a good enema? Beer? Wine? Almost certainly not hard liquor, although with a BAC of 0.4 I wouldn't rule it out. I think personally I would go with a nice, sparkling wine. -<>- I guess the moral of this story would be; be careful of what kinds of women you meet on the Internet. I realize that the Internet has desensitized us to a lot of what used to be considered bizarre, but when your date starts stabbing you during foreplay, you should be thinking to yourself that you made a bad call. Maybe I should start this story from the beginning. Last week an 18-year-old Arizona man traveled to Milwaukee, Wisconsin by bus to meet a woman he met online. Two days later a police investigation began Sunday night after cops responded to a report of a possible stabbing. Officers found the Arizona man bleeding from the neck, arms and back. He told cops that after arriving at the home of a woman he met online, he was bound and was stabbed numerous times over a timeframe of what he described as two days. A blood trail led police to a third floor apartment where they spotted a large amount of blood on the floor and on bedding in a bedroom. They also saw duct tape, which was fashioned in a manner that appeared to be a restraint. While at the apartment building, police were approached by Rebecca Chandler, 22, who stated, "I think you are here looking for me." Chandler told cops that she had engaged in relations with the Arizona man "and that the cutting was consensual but that it got quickly out of hand." As it turned out young Rebecca and her roommate--whom she identified only as "Scarlett"--are Satanists. You can almost picture it in your head. The young guy shows up to find two women instead of one. Suddenly they say they want to tie him up and he starts thinking he has scored a very kinky jackpot. But over 300 cuts and stabs later he was probably reconsidering. In a post on his Facebook wall after he was released from the hospital the man offered a one-word update: "stitches." *-- Angry deer attempts to enter SUV after being hit by driver --* HOWELL, N.J. - A New Jersey woman fended off an attack from an angry deer seeking revenge after she hit the animal with her car. Howell police Patrolman Nicholas Austin captured dash cam footage of the encounter between driver Ellen Sager and the angry deer who crossed the road and attempted to enter her vehicle, according to New Jersey.com. "It was mad, real mad," Sager said. "It happened so fast. I just grabbed a handful of antlers and tried to keep it from killing me." The deer managed to pry Sager's door open, ultimately forcing her to kick the wounded animal down to the ground, according to PIX11. Sager suffered a minor knee injury from the scuffle and police said the deer eventually died due to injuries sustained from the crash. *- Seattle man asks police to help find briefcase full of cocaine -* SEATTLE - A man in Seattle, Wash., was arrested after attempting to claim a misplaced briefcase filled with cocaine. According to the Seattle police department blotter, a man brought the briefcase to officer Doug Jorgenson saying another man left the briefcase behind after walking his dog. Jorgenson opened the briefcase in hopes of identifying the owner and found four large bags and 27 smaller ones filled with cocaine. In addition, the briefcase contained a scale, 50 diazepam pills, and a small amount of marijuana as well as a 19-year-old man's ID card and cellphone. The 19-year-old later approached officers outside of a Seattle Seahawks game inquiring about the missing briefcase. "It contained some important work paperwork and he really needed it back," he said, according to officers. Police said the man was later arrested for possession of narcotics with intent to distribute. *- Police question bridge-crossing clown when umbrella is mistaken for gun -* MOUNT PLEASANT, S.C. - Police in South Carolina questioned a bridge- crossing clown after a 911 caller mistook the costumed character's umbrella for a gun. Mount Pleasant police said a witness called 911 Wednesday to report a man in full clown regalia was crossing the Ravenel Bridge and appeared to be carrying a gun. "It appeared to be a male, but he had full face makeup on dressed like a clown," the caller told 911 dispatchers in records obtained by WCIV-TV. "It's a thing, and it's a little sketchy, and he appeared to have a rifle underneath his right arm. Could have been something else." The caller attempted to describe the clown's attributes, but had a difficult time through the clown's costume and makeup. "When I looked, my impression was that's a crazy 50-some-year-old perv. I mean, I can't give you anything solid on that," the caller said. "To look at him, he looks all rainbow. I think from the front there's more color." The caller made a second pass across the bridge to get a better look at the clown. "They won't miss him. He's half red, half yellow, and... OK, I'm sorry that is absolutely an umbrella he is carrying, not a gun," the caller said. "Oh I'm glad I was able to verify that. I'm sorry that I guessed that wrong. Like I said, I just saw the wooden part and said what I thought it was." Charleston police arrived and shut down the right lane of traffic to speak with the clown. Officers said the man wasn't up to any funny business and was crossing the bridge in costume as a tribute to a recently deceased clown comrade. The clown was allowed to finish his walk. "He's just a clown walking across the bridge," Mount Pleasant Police Inspector Chip Googe told The Post and Courier. "He said he was paying tribute to another clown that had apparently passed away or had some other troubles." *-- Colorado woman stabbed by her knife-loving dog --* HUDSON, Colo. - A Colorado woman hospitalized with a cut on her arm told authorities she was accidentally stabbed -- by her dog. Celinda Haynes of Hudson was rushed to Platte Valley Medical Center on Wednesday with a 4-inch-long gash in her arm. Suspicious hospital workers contacted authorities when Haynes told them she was stabbed by her dog, Mia. "She's lovable," Haynes told KDVR-TV. "She'll kill you with kindness." Haynes said the incident began when Mia grabbed a freshly sharpened pairing knife in her mouth with the blade pointed outward and down. Haynes said she attempted to use treats to entice Mia to drop the knife, but the canine decided to bring her "new toy" along for the ride. "When [Mia] went over to eat the treat, she ran the knife across my arm and cut a big old gash about four 4 inches long," Haynes said. Deputy Zach Johnson of Hudson's Marshal Service said he was stumped when the call came in from the dispatcher. "When dispatch said that there was a person who was stabbed by a dog, I had to make sure I heard that correctly," Johnson said. "Of course, my initial thought was, 'What's really going on here?'" Johnson said deputies investigated the suspected domestic violence, but settled on Mia as their sole suspect in the case. "Obviously, we're not charging Mia with anything because she's a dog," Johnson said. Haynes said her arm is healing while she tries to figure out a way to deal with Mia's fascination with knives. "[Mia] even pulls them out of the knife block," Haynes said. "Anything for me to chase her, she'll do it." ========================================================= >-->From CleanLaffs: ... {@} * {@} {@} * {@} * {@} : * {@} * {@} * .; {@} * {@} * {@} * {@} * ; * ; {@} * ; * : ;\ \ \ \| / / /; \\ \ Y/ / / `_\ |/ _' / \\Y// \ ( ,-}={-, ) \_//((\_/ //))(\ (/ )) (( valkyrie \) I'm not the easiest guy in the world to get along with. So when our anniversary rolled around, I wanted my wife to know how much I appreciated her tolerating me for the past 20 years. I ordered flowers and told the florist to enclose a card that read, 'Thanks for putting up with me so long.' When my wife got the delivery, she called me at work. "Just where do you think you going?" she asked. "What do you mean?" I said. She read the card aloud as the florist had written it: "Thanks for putting up with me. So long." -<>- An elderly gentleman checked into a New York hotel. The clerk mentioned the phone service the establishment made available for calling guests who wished to rise at an early hour. "No need for that, young man," snapped the old timer. "I always wake up at five A.M. sharp - without an alarm clock." "Very good, sir," the clerk replied, then asked, "Would you mind calling me at six?" -<>- A customer at a coffee shop was clearly peeved by the text message he'd just received. "You ever have that ex-girlfriend who just won't go away?" he asked his friend. "Yeah," came the reply. "My wife." -<>- Years of smoking finally caught up with my friend John one morning when he keeled over at work, clutching his heart. He was rushed to a hospital and peppered with questions. "Do you smoke?" asked a paramedic. "No," John whispered. "I quit." "That's good. When did you quit?" "Around 9:30 this morning." -<>- While visiting Annapolis, a lady tourist noticed several students on their hands and knees assessing the courtyard with pencils and clipboards in hand. "What are they doing?" she asked the tour guide. "Each year," he replied with a grin, "the upperclassmen ask the freshmen how many bricks it took to finish paving this courtyard." When they were out of earshot of the freshmen, the curious lady asked the guide: "So, what's the answer?" The guide replied: "One." -<>- As a jet was flying over Arizona on a clear day, the copilot was providing his passengers with a running commentary about landmarks over the PA system. "Coming up on the right, you can see the Meteor Crater, which is a major tourist attraction in northern Arizona. It was formed when a lump of nickel and iron, roughly 150 feet in diameter and weighing 300,000 tons, struck the earth 50,000 years ago at about 40,000 miles an hour, scattering white-hot debris for miles in every direction. The hole measures nearly a mile across and is 570 feet deep." The lady sitting next to me exclaimed: "Wow, look! It just missed the highway!" -<>- A homeowner was delighted with the way the painter had done all the work on his house. "You did a great job." he said and handed the man a check. "Also, as a bonus, here's an extra $100 to take the missus out to dinner and a movie." Later that night, the doorbell rang and it was the painter. "What's the matter," asked the homeowner, "did you forget something?" "Nope." replied the painter. "I'm just here to take your missus out to dinner and a movie like you asked." -<>- A logician's wife is having a baby. The doctor immediately hands the newborn to the dad. His wife asks impatiently: "So, is it a boy or a girl?" The logician replies: "Yes!" ========================================================= >-->From Our Friend Fran :) ___ ,'._,`. (-.___.-) (-.___.-) `-.___.-' (( @ @| . __ \ ` | ,\ |`. @| | | _.-._ __`.`=-=mm===mm:: | | |`. | | | ,'=` '=`. ( `-'|:/ /:/ `/ @| | | |, @| @| /---)W(---\ \ \ / / / / @| | ' (----| |----) ,~ |\ \ / /| / / @| \---| |---/ | | \ V /||/ / `.-| |-,' | | `-' |V / \| |/ @' | , |-' __| |__ | .;: _,-. ,--""..| |..""--. ;;:::' " ) (`--::__|_|__::--') ,-" _, / \`--...___...--'/ ( -:--'/ / /`--...___...--'\ "-._ `"'._/ /`---...___...---'\ "-._ "---. (`---....___....---') .' ",._ ,' ) |`---....___....---'| /`._| `| | (`---....___....---') ( \ | / \`---...___...---'/ `. `, ^"" `:--...___...--;' `.,' hh `-._______.-' >SMILES My father and I belong to the religion of Sikhism. We both wear the traditional turban and often encounter strange comments and questions. Once, in a restaurant, a child stared with amazement at my father. She finally got the courage to ask, "Are you a genie?" Her mother, caught off guard, turned red in the face and apologized for the remark. But my dad took no offense and decided to humor the child. He replied, "Why, yes I am. I can grant you three wishes." The child's mother blurted out, "Really?" ¤»«¤*´`*»§«:¤:»§«*´`*¤»«¤¤»«¤*´`*»§«:¤:»§«*´`*¤»«¤ Two bees met in a field. One said to the other, "The weather has been cold, wet and damp, and there aren't any flowers, so I can't make honey." "No problem," responded the first bee, "Just fly down five blocks and turn left. Keep going until you see all the cars. There's a Bar Mitzvah going on, and there are all kinds of fresh flowers and fresh fruit." "Thanks for the tip," answered the second bee, and flew away. A few hours later the two bees ran into each other again. The first bee asked, "How did it go?" "Great!" exclaimed the second bee. "It was everything you said it would be. There was plenty of fruit and, oh, such huge floral arrangements on every table." "Uh, what's that thing on your head?" asked the first bee. "That's my yarmulke," answered the second bee. "I didn't want them to think I was a wasp." ¤»«¤*´`*»§«:¤:»§«*´`*¤»«¤¤»«¤*´`*»§«:¤:»§«*´`*¤»«¤ In the historic first manned mission to Mars, two Astronauts were charting the Martian surface. "Look at that," said one to the other, "how beautiful this alien landscape is, untouched by man." At that point, he was Using an emissions detector, they followed the source of the interference until they reached the rim of a crater. "Do you see what the source of that noise is?" asked the first astronaut. "I don't know," replied the second, "but it might be coming from that Starbucks behind you." ¤»«¤*´`*»§«:¤:»§«*´`*¤»«¤¤»«¤*´`*»§«:¤:»§«*´`*¤»«¤ .-------------------.__ /` ( I don't get paid ) O/ __ ( enough for this #@#$!% ) / / / `---O-------------------' O/ O/O/ o o _ . ,---. oOO___;-`-._,.,-. _.._,' __ `. ______| |_|| | (___ ;' `. ; /' / .' `'`-' ``\\ / ; ; / / ,,))\ ,' ,' _,'`\/ `---' ; ; ; `. `. __,-' ,------`--`---. ((( _ _ __) .',' ' `. -------. |\\//\\//\\//\\//\| `. |//\\//\\//\\//\\/| | |\\//\\//\\//\\//\| ________/ \\\_\___________/ jv Walking along the beach, John tripped over a half-buried kerosene lantern. He rubbed its side and sure enough, a genie materialized. "I can't grant your wishes," explained the freed spirit, "But I'll give you three gifts for releasing me: a potion to cure ill health, a very large diamond and a dinner date with a famous movie star. By tomorrow afternoon, you will have received all these gifts." When John returned home from work the next evening, he excitedly asked his mother if anything had been delivered. "Yes," she replied. "It's been an unusual day. At 2 PM, a 55- gallon drum of chicken soup arrived. About a half-hour later, a telegram came, saying that a long-lost relative had left you a minor-league baseball stadium. And just ten minutes ago, MGM called, inviting you to dinner with Lassie tonight." ¤»«¤*´`*»§«:¤:»§«*´`*¤»«¤¤»«¤*´`*»§«:¤:»§«*´`*¤»«¤ There were four churches and a synagogue in a small Ohio town: a Presbyterian church, a Baptist church, a Methodist church, a Catholic church and a Jewish synagogue. Each church and the synagogue had a problem with squirrels. The Presbyterian Church called a meeting to decide what to do about their squirrels. After much prayer and consideration they determined the squirrels were predestined to be there and they shouldn't interfere with God's divine will. At the Baptist church the squirrels had taken an interest in the baptistery. The deacons met and decided to put a water slide on the baptistery and let the squirrels drown themselves. The squirrels liked the slide and, unfortunately, knew instinctively how to swim so twice as many squirrels showed up the following week. The Methodist church decided that they were not in a position to harm any of God's creatures. So, they humanely trapped their squirrels and set them free near the Baptist Church. Two weeks later the squirrels were back when the Baptists took down the water slide. But the Catholic Church came up with a very creative strategy. They baptized all the squirrels and consecrated them as members of the church. Now they only see them on Christmas and Easter. Not much was heard from the Jewish synagogue, but it's rumored that they took one squirrel and circumcised him and they haven't seen a squirrel on their property since. --- ...LOL! Thanks Fran! ========================================================= >-->FUN Places To Net Visit :) World Of Squirrels!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/worldofsquirrels.html Detroit Steel!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/detroitsteel.html MacGyver - How To Do It!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/macgyver.html Big Boy Toys!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/bigboytoys.html Luxury Yacht!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/luxyacht.html Classic Woodies!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/woodcars.html Chevy Selling It!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/chevysi.html Why Me? Moments!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/whyme.html Life's Little Oops!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/whoops.html Parenting No-No's!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/parenting.html Got A Nanosecond?- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/nano.html Fighter Aircraft!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/fighteraircraft.html 50s Concept Car!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/conceptcars.html All Occasion Cars!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/allcar.html Detroit Autorama!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/detroitauto.html Only ONE Job!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/onejob.html Over The Limit!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/overthelimit.html Pucker Up, Baby!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/babypucker.html -<>- >From Our Friend LouiseAu :) She sent us ones we have here... About Dogs And People http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/aboutdogs.html Owls In Camouflage! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/owls.html --- ...Hard to see some of these! Thanks LouiseAu! Amazing Owl Transformation http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WRXT_TrUbiw&feature=player_embedded We've all had those days where we just can't go on anymore and these 10 Animals Who Have Had Enough demonstrate that it's not just humans who get tired. I know the feeling of these animals that just want to be left alone and take a nice long nap and can't seem to get any peace and quiet. As for the cat that is sticking his head under the faucet he must have had a really bad day. https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=PiHoIqfdkhM A hilarious sketch that will make you think again about the names of all these devices. This is one favorite comedy sketches of all times! http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=kAG39jKi0lI --- ...LNAO! Good ones! Thanks LouiseAu! -<>- >From Our Friend Geniann :) She sent us this one... COOLEST MAN TOY We Have Here... WaterCar's Panther! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/panther.html These are amazing! It's the only way I will get to see some of these places, they are breath taking. Outstanding Chapple photos, the accompanying Dubai ones are good also. Looks like the Mumbai suburb needs a little rehab or just remove people and a big fire. Sure contrast with other extraordinary photos. Pretty breathtaking. Confident you will enjoy--- http://tinyurl.com/nzsqpn7 Remember these gas stations? Some of us even worked at them - filling up tanks, checking oil, washing windshields and more.... I remember these days and gas 25-30 cents a gallon. Never be this way again. Old fuel stops: http://hipspics.freewebspace.com/gas/gas.html This was a guest speaker at an actual Conference on Aging in California; The speaker is a weatherman, but SHOULD be a stand up comic. I hope no one is offended . . . he is hysterical. https://www.youtube.com/embed/LR2qZ0A8vic?rel=0 --- ...LMAO! Thanks Geniann! ======================================================= >-->Quotes & Thunkers: "Sometimes I sit for hours weighing the fine distinctions among the words spunk, pluck, nerve, chutzpah, gall and moxie." --George Carlin A Photon checks into a hotel and the bellhop asks him if he has any luggage. The Photon replies, "No I'm traveling light." "A restaurant here in New York is serving a grilled cheese- flavored martini. Or as parents put it, 'Finally, a way to get my kids to finish their martinis.'" -Jimmy Fallon "Vin Diesel is with us tonight. Vin is not his real name. His real name is Vehicle Identification Number." -Jimmy Kimmel "A new study finds that if you're drunk around sober people, you'll think you're less drunk than if you're around other drunk people. And if you're drunk around sober people, chances are you've got a problem." -Jimmy Fallon "A man is getting bar mitzvah'd at age 113. They're hoping the attendance is better than last year when he got circumcised." -Conan O'Brien "This week a study was released by the World Health Organization showing that the United States is the third most depressing country in the world after India and China. When Americans heard the news they were like, 'Oh, we only got third?'" -James Corden "A new study says we should change how we feed cows so they don't produce so much of the greenhouse gas methane. First up, they recommend eliminating taco night." -Conan O'Brien "A guacamole-themed restaurant is set to open in New York on Friday, and it already turned brown." -Seth Meyers "A school in Tennessee is facing criticism for separating students with bad grades from students with good grades at lunch. That's crazy! You don't use grades to separate kids. Everyone knows that kids should be separated by clothes, looks, and how much money their parents make." -Jimmy Fallon >Updated FUN STUFF URLS - Oh Yeah :) Shangy! ------------------------------------------------------------------------ http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/urls.html FUN URLS ------------------------------------------------------------------------ -->FULL LENGTH - FREE On line AUDIO MP3 Christian Foundational Class http://www.truthortradition.com/modules.php?name=News&file=article&sid=61 NEW LIFE IN CHRIST! ------------------------------------------------------------------------ -->This is for all you who love food and DARE to make it at home Yep. You guessed it - Recipes. These are Tried and True, Yummy to the Tummy, good old fashioned home cooking recipes that are EASY to do :) Visit Shangy's Easy-Does-It Home Recipes: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/easy.html Home Recipes >Got A good Recipe? SHARE IT HERE: Share A Recipe ************************************************************************ >TO SUBSCRIBE: Visit Here This Weeks regular Shangy emails OR For the Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com ************************************************************************