The Perfect Crime And More ... :) Shangy! >Here are the details on our Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com To UnSubscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com Group home page: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ShangyFunList Through no fault of my own we suddenly became an adult club in the love and romance directory so you will have to confirm that you are an adult when you go here. I still have no idea how to change this back as it sends me around in a circle when I try! or Web Site: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/ShangyFunList.html Group email address: ShangyFunList@yahoogroups.com or email me here: bcrsystems@earthlink.net ================ *~* A REMINDER: PLEASE Send me sweet, interesting, funny, inspiring, family type forwards ANY TIME here... bcrsystems@earthlink.net I Need them, Love them, Use them, and Share them! THANK YOU!! AND For Facebook Users: Please Friend Me / Like Me here... http://tinyurl.com/cma6all AND Please Share This email with All Your Friends And Family! ^~^ May God SUPER BLESS You As You Do! THANK YOU! :) ================ >-->HOT Off The 'Shangy' Press :) This too hot to handle one comes from our friend Linda. These animals are so incredible! Be sure to watch the video at the end. ######################### ######################### #######' '####### ####' '#### ### ### ## |\ ## # |V \_ # # | ' \ # # ) ,_\ # # / | # ## / \ ## ### | \ ### ####. \ \ .#### ######-._| \.###### #########| |# |###### ###jgs###/ |#'. /###### ######################### ######################### Beautiful Wolves http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/wolves.html --- ...Very handsome animals indeed! Thanks Linda! ======================================================= >-->From TheFunnyBone: Two Free Tickets To The Show _ mMm _[_]_ A young couple got married and went away on /(")\ (") their honeymoon. After two weeks they came //)^(\\//:\\ back and finally put away all of the presents /(/&@&\\/|~|/ they received from friends and family. Since / /-~`~-\ ||| this was a new home, the process took some `/ \||| time. `----------'-- The silver went into the closet, items were put on the walls for display and some of the more intimate apparel was put in the bedroom drawers. A week later, they received in the mail two tickets for a popular show where tickets were impossible to get. They were very excited and warmed by the gesture of the person who sent this. Inside the envelope, however, was only a small piece of paper with a single line. "Guess who sent them." The pair had much fun trying to identify the donor, but failed in the effort. They went to the theatre, and had a wonderful time. On their return home late at night, still trying to guess the identity of the unknown host, they found the house stripped of every article of value. And on the bare table in the dining-room was a piece of paper on which was written in the same hand as the enclosure with the tickets: "Now you know!" ======================================================= +------------ BIZARRE HOLIDAYS ------------+ August 11 is Son and Daughter Day August 12 is Middle Child's Day August 13 is Left Hander's Day August 14/15 V-J Day - which date do you mark the end of WWII? August 15 is Relaxation Day - now this one's for me! August 16 is National Tell a Joke Day August 17 is National Thriftshop Day ======================================================= >-->From GoodCleanFun: .======================================. | ___ ___ ___ _ _ _ | | \_/ \_/ \_/ C|||C|||C||| |-| |-| |-| | | _|_ _|_ _|_ ||| ||| ||| |_| |_| |_| | '===================================== ,sSSSs DUFFY'S WATERING HOLE SSSS "( .:. SSS@ =/ \~/ C|||' SSSS_(_ _Y_ ___|||______________________________SS/ _)_) /.- [____________________________________] \ /\// | ____ ____ ____ ____ | \|==(\_/ | (____) (____) (____) (____) | (/ ; | | | | | | | | | | |____| | | | | | | | | | | \ |\ | | | | | | | | | | ) ) ) | |____| |____| |____| |____| | ( |/ | I====I I====I I====I I====I | /\ | jgs | | | | | | | | | /.(=\ Y\_\ >The Cocktail A man goes into a bar very thirsty. He sits down waiting for the bartender to see him. The man next to him calls for the bartender saying, "I'll have another Waterloo." The bartender gives him a tall ice cold drink, then asks the newcomer what he would like to drink. Wanting to try this new drink he says, "I'll have a Waterloo, too." The bartender gives him a tall ice-cold drink. He takes a big drink and says, "HEY! This isn't any good. It tastes just like water!" The man next to him looks at the bartender and says, "Well, it is water ... right, Lou?" -<>- >Compensation My brother was on a plane that had taken off and was approaching cruising altitude, when one of the flight attendants came on the public- address system. She announced that she was sorry, but the plane's restroom was out of order. The flight attendant went on to apologize to the passengers for any inconvenience. But then she finished cheerily with: "So, as compensation, free drinks will be served." -<>- >Courier? After my wife landed a coveted job offer from courier company DHL, we went out of town to celebrate. While on our trip, she was contacted by the company's Human Resources Department with an urgent request to complete and send back her tax forms. "No problem," she said. "I'll FedEx them right over." -<>- >Nose Ring I was hanging out with a friend of mine when we saw a woman walk by us with a nose ring attached to an earring by a chain. My friend said, "Wouldn't the chain rip out every time she turned her head?" I had to explain that a person's nose and ear remain the same distance apart no matter which way the head is turned. -<>- ,;;;, ;;;;;;; .-'`\, '/_ .' \ ("`(_) / `-,.'\ \_/ \ \/\ `--` \ \ \ / /| | /_/ |_| jgs ( _\ ( _\ #:## #:## #:## #:## #:## #:## #:## >Third Biggest Lie Ann Landers (1918-2002) challenged her readers to come up with the world's third biggest lie -- right after "The check is in the mail" and "I'm from the government and I'm here to help you." Here is a sampling from the thousands she received: - "It's a good thing you came in today. We only have two more in stock." - "Five pounds is nothing on a person of your height." - "You made it yourself? I never would have guessed." - "You don't look a day over 40." - "Dad, I need to move out of the dorm into an apartment of my own so I can have some peace and quiet when I study." - "It's delicious, but I can't eat another bite." - "The new ownership won't affect you. The company will remain the same." - "The puppy won't be any trouble, Mom. I promise I'll take care of it myself." - "Your hair looks just fine." - "Put away the map. I know exactly how to get there." - "You don't need it in writing. You have my personal guarantee." ========================================================= >-->From Our Friend LouiseA :) __________ |DAILY NEWS| |&&& ======| |=== ======| |=== == %%$| |[_] ======| |=== ===!##| ejm97 |__________| >20 REAL NEWSPAPER HEADLINES 1. Include Your Children When Baking Cookies 2. Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Experts Say 3. Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers 4. Drunks Get Nine Months in Violin Case 5. Iraqi Head Seeks Arms 6. British Left Waffles on Falkland Islands 7. Teacher Strikes Idle Kids 8. Clinton Wins Budget; More Lies Ahead 9. Plane Too Close to Ground, Crash Probe Told 10. Miners Refuse to Work After Death 11. Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant 12. Two Sisters Reunited after 18 Years in Checkout Counter 13. War Dims Hope for Peace 14. If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last a While 15. Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide 16. Man Struck by Lightning Faces Battery Charge 17. New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group 18. Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Space 19. Kids Make Nutritious Snacks 20. Typhoon Rips through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead -<>- .----. ===(_)== THIS WONT HURT A BIT... // 6 6 \\ / ( 7 ) \ '--' / \_ ._/ __) (__ /"`/`\`V/`\`\ / \ `Y _/_ \ / [DR]\_ |/ / /\ | ( \/ / / / \ \ \ / \ `-/` _.` jgs `=. `=./ `"` >THINGS YOU DON'T WANT TO HEAR DURING SURGERY ~ Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy. ~ Someone call the janitor. We're going to need a mop. ~ Bo! Bo! Come back with that! Bad dog! ~ Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what's that? ~ Hand me that, uh, that uh, thingie. ~ Oh no! I just lost my Rolex. ~ Oops! Hey, has anyone ever survived 500ml of this stuff before? ~ Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens! ~ What's this doing here? ~ I wish I hadn't forgotten my glasses. ~ Well folks, this will be an experiment for us all. ~ Sterile, shcmerile. The floor's clean, right? ~ Anyone see where I left that scalpel? ~ Oh no! Page 47 of the manual is missing! -<>- >More SMILES 69696969 69696969 6969 696969 696969 6969 969 69 6969696 6969 6969 696 969 696969696 696969696969 696 969 69696969696 6969696969696 696 696 9696969696969 969696969696 969 696 696969696969 969696969 969 696 696 96969 _=_ 9696969 69 696 9696 969696 q(-_-)p 696969 6969 96969696 '_) (_` 69696969 96 /__/ \ 69 69 _(<_ / )_ 96 6969 (__\_\_|_/__) 9696 There is a story about a monastery in Europe perched high on a cliff several hundred feet in the air. The only way to reach the monastery was to be suspended in a basket which was pulled to the top by several monks who pulled and tugged with all their strength. Obviously, the ride up the steep cliff in that basket was terrifying. One tourist got exceedingly nervous about half-way up as he noticed that the rope by which he was suspended was old and frayed. With a trembling voice he asked the monk who was riding with him in the basket how often they changed the rope. The monk thought for a moment and answered brusquely, "Whenever it breaks." ------- "What's the date today?" asks a blonde. "I don't know. You've got a newspaper in your hands... why don't you look at it?" "That wouldn't do any good, it's yesterday's paper ------- At his request, each morning three-year-old Ray's mother pinned a bath towel to the back shoulders of his size two T-shirt. Immediately in his young imaginative mind the towel became a brilliant magic blue and red cape. And he became Superman. Outfitted each day in his "cape," Ray's days were packed with adventure and daring escapades. He was Superman. This fact was clearly pointed out last fall when his mother enrolled him in kindergarten class. During the course of the interview, the teacher asked Ray his name. "Superman," he answered politely and without pause. The teacher smiled, cast an appreciative glance at his mother, and asked again, "Your real name, please." Again, Ray answered, "Superman." Realizing the situation demanded more authority, or maybe to hide amusement, the teacher closed her eyes for a moment, then in a voice quite stern, said, "I will have to have your real name for the records." Sensing he'd have to play straight with the teacher, Ray slid his eyes around the room, hunched closer to her, and patting a corner of frayed towel at his shoulder, answered in a voice hushed with conspiracy, "Clark Kent." ------- One day a government worker was digging through his office drawers when suddenly he came upon a magic lamp. (Oh, c'mon, I'm sure there's one buried in your desk too.) Since he'd heard these jokes before, he knew that he had to rub the lamp and make the genie come out. So he rubbed the lamp and -- oh, surprise -- out popped a genie. The genie asked, as genies will, "What is your first wish?" The government worker thought about it for a second, then replied, "I would like to be rich!" So the genie granted him his wish, and poof the man was surrounded by piles of money rivaling the heaps of even Martha Stewart and Bill Gates. Since the government worker knew the whole wish process, the genie didn't even have to ask for number two before he said, "My second wish is to be on an island with beautiful women surrounding me and obeying my every command!" And poof, he was there. Then the government worker -- or, as I like to call him, civil servant -- decided on his third wish, "I don't want to do any work ever again!" and poof -- ubiquitous ironic twist -- he was back in his office. --- ...LMAO! Thanks LouiseA! =========================================================== >-->From Our Friend PatDeE :) _, `(. )- `` )/, '\\ =/= ))) \\ < D/ \\ e_ / \\_ __\ \____ / 7// )/` /\ |(_/ ) (/ ( \ '_/\ \ \ ^\ /\ \__/ \______|<-_\ )_7___\ )_/ /` ( \ / \_ / '\/\ | / , | | | | | | * | | | * | | | * | ' | ``, | | | + + # |___/|___/ ___|/ ?____ /( )\ / | U ) \_ /^/ \^\ _/_'- /__/- /__ \_/_/ \_\ __b'ger__ -- >Divorce vs Murder ...? A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, walked up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said, "I would like to buy some cyanide." The pharmacist asked, "Why in the world do you need cyanide?" The lady replied, "I need it to poison my husband." The pharmacist's eyes got big and he explained, "Lord have mercy! I can't give you cyanide to kill your husband, that's against the law? I'll lose my license! They'll throw both of us in jail! All kinds of bad things will happen. Absolutely not! You CANNOT have any cyanide!" The lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the pharmacist's wife. The pharmacist looked at the picture and replied, "You didn't tell me you had a prescription." --- ...LOL! Thanks PatDeE! ============================================================= >-->In The Worldly News: >From American Family Association: Navy orders Bibles removed from base hotels Navy Lodge http://tinyurl.com/p5oprt3 -<>- >From BizarreNews: *The perfect crime* It seemed like the perfect crime. You have a few drinks, maybe smoke a little dope, and then steal a snake. Who would ever expect a person high on dope to steal a snake? No one, that's who. But no plan is fool-proof, as the perpetrator of this particular herpetological heist learned. Authorities say a New York woman who crashed her car into a Long Island fire house was found to be in possession of marijuana - and a stolen snake. Nassau County police say 22-year-old Sarah Espinosa, of Albany, was driving on Jericho Turnpike when she crossed the median and collided with a vehicle. They say she continued through the front door of the New Hyde Park fire house and hit two fire trucks. Fire personnel found that the small ball python she had stolen had wrapped itself around her neck. Authorities say the snake was stolen from a nearby pet store before the accident. Espinosa was arraigned on charges including petit larceny, reckless endangerment and driving while intoxicated. *-- Woman tells police she is a 'god' after Raisinets theft allegations --* MARTIN COUNTY, Fla. (UPI) - A woman who allegedly swiped a bag of Raisinets from a Cumberland Farms store in Florida felt that the candy caper was justified because she is a "god." Nancy Mullis was allegedly seen taking a $2.99 bag of Raisinets and then leaving the store. Once she was outside, the suspect "flaunted the stolen property at the store clerk." The 52-year-old was given a trespass warning and a court summons for theft. The candies made their way back onto the shelves at the store. Later on in the day, Mullis went to a Discount Family Dollar and caused a scene. "Mullis was waving her arms wildly and cursing," TC Palm reported a court affidavit as saying. "Mullis was stating that she was a god and could do what she wanted." Apparently what Mullis wanted to do was flip over a newspaper stand and knock items off of shelves at the store. The "sacred" suspect was arrested on a disorderly conducted charge and given another trespass warning. *-- Man allegedly takes Florida woman on date so friend can steal her purse --* BOCA RATON, Fla. (UPI) - A Florida man may not have been looking for a cheap date, but he was apparently hoping to make a few bucks by going on one. Boca Raton police responded after a woman called and reported that a man came up and snatched her purse while she was making out with a friend on the beach. Neither of the kissers were identified, but the woman told officers that the individual who had dropped her and her date off at the beach, Daniel Eisemann, was the man who took her purse. She had never met Eisemann before he arrived with her date to pick her up. After the 27-year-old snatched the purse, which contained her cell phone and $500 cash, the woman's date took off after him, the Sun Sentinel reported. When he didn't come back, the woman sought assistance and called police. The woman's date, Eisemann and another man were found at a nearby Red Roof Inn. The purse, minus the cash, was recovered. Eisemann was charged with grand theft. *-- Alleged Alabama burglar smokes dead woman's ashes thinking they were drugs --* CITRONELLE, Ala. (UPI) - Vietnam War veteran Phillip McMullen likely saw some bad things during his time in the service, but what he saw when returned to his Alabama home ranks right up there. McMullen came back to his Citronelle residence after visiting some friends out of town and discovered that his home had been burglarized. The gun safe at McMullen's house had been damaged, but it wasn't broken into. The same could not be said for the plastic box which held his deceased wife's ashes. "They even took my wife's ashes off my headboard, strewed them around, looked like they tried to smoke some of them or something," McMullen told FOX10 News. "I bet that was a nasty taste when they (did) that." McMullen and his wife were married for 22 years and he says the violation makes him "want to fight again." If the Mobile County Sheriff's Office is able to catch the crook, it's possible they will be charged with desecration of a grave. "It's hard to put in words, it makes me want to fight again, and I don't like to fight," McMullen said. "I don't know if God will forgive them for what they've done or not." ========================================================= >-->From CleanLaffs: __ @@;, ( ; ? : ); _| |_ | | || | | _| |_ | \ \ \/ || \/ ___ / / | __| |\ __||____||___||______/| | ||| | |_______ _________| | ||| ||| |____ | | ____| ||| Design by \ \______ ) | | / ______/ / || | | | | | /___| || Samule J. Neptune || | | |_ /| | |\ _| || || || | \__, / | | | \<__/ | || My husband retired, and for the first time in over 40 years I had to think about preparing midday meals. Tired of it after several months, I said, "I married you for better or worse, but not for lunch." "Fair enough. From now on I'll make my own," he replied. A few weeks later he had to go downtown on business and invited me to join him afterwards. "We could have lunch at that Chinese place we both like," he suggested. I happily agreed. At the restaurant the next day we were seated, and the waiter came to take our order. My husband looked up and with a straight face said, "Separate checks, please." -<>- An English professor announced to the class; "There are two words I don't allow in my class. One is gross and the other is cool." From the back of the room a voice called out, "Yeah? So, what are the words?" -<>- When Peters learned that he was being fired, he went to see the head of human resources. "Since I've been with the firm for so long," he said, "I think I deserve at least a letter of recommendation." The human resources director agreed and said he'd have the letter that next day. The following morning, Peters found the letter on his desk. It read, "Jonathan Peters worked for our company for eleven years. When he left us, we were very satisfied." -<>- A vacationer called a seaside hotel to ask its location. "It's only a stone's throw from the beach," he was told. "But how will I recognize it?" asked the man. Came the reply: "It's the one with all the broken windows." -<>- Every time I say that I'm ready to order in a restaurant, what I really mean is that I'm not ready but the panic will help me make a decision. -<>- I hide photos on my computer of me petting animals at the zoo in a file named Fireworks and vacuums so my dog won't find them. -<>- It's important to have a good vocabulary. If I had known the difference between the words antidote and anecdote, one of my good friends would still be alive today. -<>- When a young man left his dorm and moved into an apartment, he went shopping for cleaning equipment. His cart was loaded with a broom, mop, dust-pan, sponges and a full array of cleaning products. At the last minute he topped off his cart with a lone food purchase -- a large bag of potato chips. Seeing the checkout clerk's quizzical look, he explained, "I'm a very messy eater." -<>- A mother traveled 2,000 miles to be with her only son on the day he was to receive his Air Force wings and also get married. "It was wonderful," she said later. "It isn't every day that a mother watches her son receive his wings in the morning and have them clipped in the evening." -<>- Having trouble with the doctor's notes on an emergency case which read, "Shot in the lumbar region," the poor girl was flustered and at her wit's end. At last she thought she had it figured out and brightened up as she typed up the record, "Wounded in the woods." ========================================================= >-->From Laugh&Lift: ____ _ /////|\\ ``````\\\ `/` ))) \`, ((( `--- ,\\\ ,---/ )),))) / , `(( ((( `--. ) `__)) ________ | | ,-./\ \ _,-' \ \__,-. \ \,-' /`.__,-'_,-\ `-. / \____`--'____________ | \ Starshine >Quick Jokes While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins, I used to take my 4-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds. She was unfailingly intrigued by the various appliances of old age, particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs. One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and whispered, 'The tooth fairy will never believe this!' -------- "Save the earth.....It's the only planet with chocolate!" :) -------- An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman, a Latvian, a Chinese, a Japanese, a Kiwi, a Canuck, an Eskimo, a Fijian, a Turk, an Aussie, a Yank, an Egyptian, a Spaniard, a Mongolian, a Tibetan, a Polack, a Mexican, a Spaniard, a Greek, a Russian, an Estonian, a German, an Indian, an Italian, a Brazilian, a Kenyan, a South African, a Filipino, a Pakistani, a Korean, an Argentinean, a Lithuanian, a Dane, a Finn, a Swede, an Israeli, a Romanian, a Bulgarian, a Serb, a Czech, a Croat, and a Panamanian go to a fancy bar... The bouncer says: "Sorry. I can't let you in without a Thai. " -------- A Girl Scout troop in Waukesha, Wis., sold cookies to several people who then failed to pay. Now the troop is taking the deadbeats to small- claims court to make them pay up. According to an April 29, 2005, Associated Press story, the amounts owed by two couples and three other women ranged from $301.42 to $1,485.68. "We call many times before taking this step," Slowinski said. "We send them letters. When all else fails, this is our last resort." Previous letters seeking payment have suggested creation of a repayment plan. My question is: Who buys $1500 worth of Girl Scout cookies? I mean, I like Samoas as much as the next guy, but please.... ------- . . :"-. .-"; |:`.`.__..__.'.';| || :-" "-; || :; :; / .==. .==. \ : _.--._ ; ; .--.' `--' `.--. : : __;` ':__ ; ; ' '-._:;_.-' ' : '. `--' .' ."-._ _.-". .' ""------"" `. /`- -'\ /`- -'\ :`- .' `. -'; ; / \ : : : ; ; ; ; : : ':_:.' '.;_;' :_ _; ; "-._ -" :`-. _.._ :_ () _; "--::__. `. \"- -"/`._ : .-"-. -"-. ""--..____.' / .__ __. \ : / , / "" \ . \ ; bug "-:___..--" "--..___;-" My friend Allison adopted a stray cat and took him to the vet to be neutered. "I'm about 90 percent certain he's been fixed," the vet said. "How can I be 100 percent sure?" Allison asked. "Watch to see if he does any 'male' things." "He already lies on the couch all day," she said. "If he starts hogging the remote, I'll bring him in." -------- A thief in Paris planned to steal some paintings from the Louvre Museum. After careful planning, he got past security, stole the paintings, and made it safely to his van. However, he was captured only two blocks away when his van ran out of gas. When asked how he could mastermind such a crime and then make such an obvious error, he replied, "Monsieur, that is the reason I stole the paintings. I had no Monet to buy Degas to make the Van Gogh." (See if you have De Gaulle to send this on to someone else. I sent it to you because I figured I had nothing Toulouse.) -------- "A Woman's Prayer" Dear Lord, I pray for Wisdom to understand my man; Love to forgive him: and Patience for his moods. Because Lord, if I pray for strength, I'll beat him to death! Amen! -<>- && && &&&&. &&& .&&&&& && &&& &&&&&&&&& &&&&&&&&& & &` && && .&&&&& &&&; &8 .&&&: && &` & && 8&& & `& && && .&_ oO_&.-.-. && ( __ -/--' &&~ .'-__-'& &&&~`'\`& &&&~` _& &&&&` && &&8&&&& &&&&&&& & &&&&&&& &&;&&&&&&& &&&&&&&&&& ~~~ .~~~~~ `&&&&&&&&& ~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~;!&&&&&&&&&&~/~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~\~~~~&/` \`~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~ `~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~ ~~~~ ~~~~ BP >Catchy signs! Plumber: "We repair what your husband fixed." Pizza shop slogan: "7 days without pizza makes one Weak." At a tire shop in Milwaukee: "Invite us to your next blowout." Door of a plastic surgeons office: "Hello, can we pick your nose?" At a Towing Company: "We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows." Billboard on the side of the road: "Keep your eyes on the road and stop reading these signs." On an Electricians truck: "Let us remove your shorts." In a Nonsmoking Area: "If we see smoking we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action." On Maternity Room Door: "Push, Push, Push." At an Optometrists Office "If you don't see what your looking for, you've come to the right place." On a Taxidermist's window: "We really know our stuff." In a Podiatrist's office: "Time wounds all heels." On a fence: "Salesmen Welcome, Dog food is expensive." Outside a Muffler Shop: "No appointment necessary, we'll hear you coming." In a Veterinarians waiting room: "Be back in 5 minutes, Sit! Stay!" Inside a Bowling Alley: "Please be quiet, we need to hear a pin drop." In the front yard of a funeral home: "Drive carefully, we'll wait." In a counselors office: "Growing old is mandatory, growing wise is optional." Read all about Laugh & Lift at http://www.laughandlift.com ==================================================== >-->FUN Places To Net Visit :) Amazing Football Facts http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/footballfacts.html Arrows Across America http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/arrows.html Attitude is everything 3 http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/attitude3.html Fighter Aircraft http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/fighteraircraft.html Mabel The Chicken http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/chicken.html That's God! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/thatsgod.html Sand Sculpture Art 3 http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/sandart3.html Amazing Bus Stops http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/bus.html Elephant Rescue http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/elephants.html Jay Leno's Garage http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/jaylenogarage.html -<>- >From Our Friend LouiseA :) Swing! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=18F_sIaimGM&feature=share Pilots will love this...and so will every American. http://www.youtube.com/v/RU1oB8sGyYM You know: US OLD GUYS WERE NOT BORN OLD http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=RU1oB8sGyYM The Air Force is developing this stunning spy drone that behaves and looks like a bird to fight terrorism. A related tiny drone could fly around like a bug for closer surveillance, even indoors. http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=_5YkQ9w3PJ4 Extreme 300-foot rope swing http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=fdJc1_IBKJA --- ...Wowsers! Thanks LouiseA! -<>- >From Our Friend Melody :) Star Spangled Banner as you have never heard before http://stg.do/video/?v=kkPf God's Not Dead (Movie( http://tinyurl.com/mvt3spx --- ...Awesome! Thanks Melody! Will Obama's Executive Order Lead To The End Of Christian Education http://tinyurl.com/kxpcj8m --- ...Scary. Thanks Melody! ========================================================= >-->Quotes & Thunkers: "Police in Ohio are looking for two women who tried to rob a bakery but left with only two glazed donuts because there was no money in the register. The cops are offering a small reward for information on the women, and a huge reward for info on those doughnuts." -Jimmy Fallon "A 44-year-old mother in New York was arrested after she left her 7-year-old unattended at a Long Island Lego store. Luckily by the time the police found the child, he had already built a better mother." -Seth Meyers "Kia is recalling more than 50,000 cars because of an issue with the steering system caused by the wrong type of adhesive holding together certain parts. Then Kia drivers said, 'Wait, these cars are GLUED together?'" -Jimmy Fallon "Scrabble is adding 5,000 new words including 'chillax' and 'selfie.' So kids, there's never been a better time to challenge your grandparents to a game of Scrabble." -Conan O'Brien "Tonight's CMA Music Festival was held in Nashville - which is a coincidence because I was held in Nashville once." -Craig Ferguson "According to a new study, one in four Americans admits to not exercising at all. As a result, one in four Americans is actually TWO in four Americans." -Seth Meyers "Home Depot is now selling 3D printers, which customers can use to print out tools and parts. It's all part of Home Depot's plan to immediately go out of business." -Jimmy Fallon "It's a great day for Pope Francis. He released his top 10 tips for feeling happier. Most of the Pope's tips were what I expected, like No. 7, 'Respect nature.' No. 3, 'Be calm.' Except No. 1 - start every day by watching the video of Justin Bieber getting punched in face." -Craig Ferguson "Congress is now getting ready to take a month off. From what?" -Dave Letterman "A Massachusetts man was arrested for illegally keeping over 400 birds in his home. He tried to keep it a secret, but he couldn't keep the birds from tweeting about it." -Craig Ferguson "A company in India is releasing the first-ever 'smart shoe' that connects with Google Maps to track your footsteps. 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