Valentine Smiles And More... :) Shangy! >Here are the details on our Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com To UnSubscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com Group home page: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ShangyFunList Through no fault of my own we suddenly became an adult club in the love and romance directory so you will have to confirm that you are an adult when you go here. I still have no idea how to change this back as it sends me around in a circle when I try! or Web Site: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/ShangyFunList.html Group email address: ShangyFunList@yahoogroups.com or email me here: bcrsystems@earthlink.net ================ *~* A REMINDER: PLEASE Send me sweet, interesting, funny, inspiring, family type forwards ANY TIME here... bcrsystems@earthlink.net I Need them, Love them, Use them, and Share them! THANK YOU!! AND For Facebook Users: Please Friend Me / Like Me here... http://tinyurl.com/cma6all AND Please Share This email with All Your Friends And Family! ^~^ May God SUPER BLESS You As You Do! THANK YOU! :) ================ >-->HOT Off The 'Shangy' Press :) This amazing Hot one comes from our friends Linda and Geniann. It is sure to astonish you the amount of work and patience that this took! Check it out here... ,@@@@@@@, ,,,. ,@@@@@@/@@, .oo8888o. ,&%%&%&&%,@@@@@/@@@@@@,8888\88/8o ,%&\%&&%&&%,@@@\@@@/@@@88\88888/88' %&&%&%&/%&&%@@\@@/ /@@@88888\88888' %&&%/ %&%%&&@@\ V /@@' `88\8 `/88' `&%\ ` /%&' |.| \ '|8' |o| | | | | |.| | | | | jgs \\/ ._\//_/__/ ,\_//__\\/. \_//__/_ Tree Trunk Art http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/trunkart.html --- ...Wow! Simply Awesome! Thanks Ladies! ======================================================= >-->From TheFunnyBone: Vow Of Silence ___ Brother Maury entered the 'Monastery of .' '. Silence,' and the Chief Priest said, "Brother, ## ## this is a silent monastery, you are welcome # _ _ # here as long as you like, but you may not ( e e ) speak until I direct you to do so." | > | \ - / Brother Maury lived in the monastery for a .-/`---'\-. full year before the Chief Priest said to / ;.___.; \ him: "Brother Maury, you have been here / \ / \ a year now, you may speak two words." / \ / \ ; | _|_ | ; Brother Maury hesitated, then said, | | | | | "Hard Bed." | \ | / | / |=,_____,=| \ "I'm sorry to hear that," the Chief \ / )\ \ / Priest said. "We will get you a better __/'._/ || \_.'\__ bed." '-. / | || | \ .-' / / / \\ \ \ \ The next year, Brother Maury was called '-' | /| | '-' by the Chief Priest. "You may say | || | another two words Brother Maury." \ ^| | | ^ / "Cold Food," said Brother Maury, and | | the Chief Priest assured him that the food / \ would be better in the future. | | jgs | | On his third anniversary at the monastery, '-._______.-' the Chief Priest again called Brother Maury |_/ \_| into his office. "Two words you may say today," says he. "I Quit!" said Brother Maury. "That's probably best." said the Chief Priest. "All you have done since you got here is complain." ======================================================= +------------ BIZARRE HOLIDAYS ------------+ February 10 is Umbrella Day February 11 is White Tee-Shirt Day and Don't Cry Over Spilled Milk Day February 12 is National Plum Pudding Day February 13 is Get A Different Name Day and Dream Your Sweet Day February 14 is Ferris Wheel Day and National Heart to Heart Day February 15 is National Gum Drop Day February 16 is Do A Grouch A Favor Day ======================================================= >-->From GoodCleanFun: ) ( ( ) ________[]_ [] /^=^-^-^=^-^\ /^~^~^~^~^~^~\ /^-^-^-^-^-^-^\ /^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^\ /__^_^_^_^^_^_^_\ /_^_^_^^_^_^_^_^_\ | .==. | ___ | .--. | ^^| |LI| [}{] |^^^^^ /___\ ^^^^^| [}{] |[]| |^^^^^ &&|__|__|_______|&& ." | ". 88|________|__|__|888 ==== (o_|_o) ==== jgs ==== u u ==== >Cottage We were staying at a country resort and became friendly with the handyman. "My neighbor has a nice little cottage for sale, case you're interested," he told us. Despite its run-down appearance, we fell in love with the place and bought it "as is." The day we moved in, our new friend dropped by. "You got a good buy, " he admitted. "Cottage needs some work though. Roof leaks, plumbing's shot and the well runs dry in the summer." Dismayed, I retorted, "Why didn't you tell us that before we bought it?" "Weren't neighbors then," he replied. -<>- >New Bed? The doctor suggested that my husband, because of his back problems, not sleep on our waterbed. When we discussed what type of bed should replace it, he said that he wanted a firm mattress on a queen-size bed. I preferred a softer mattress in a double size, and as our discussion grew more heated, it became obvious we would have difficulty reaching agreement. Then our young son, who had overheard our conversation, suggested, "Why don't you just get bunk beds?" -<>- >Pink Vanilla An eight-year-old boy was waiting in line at an ice cream stand and hanging on to the hand of his three-year-old cousin, who kept yelling impatiently, "I want vanilla!" The stand was out of vanilla, but the older boy handled the situation with all the skill of a child psychologist. He bought two strawberry cones and handed one to his cousin, saying, "Here you are - pink vanilla!" -<>- >Toy Computer I was recently attending a birthday party for my mother-in-law, when my three-year-old grandson came to me with a Strawberry Shortcake toy computer that can help with spelling and some other things. He wanted me to turn it on for him. I opened it up, looked around for an on/off switch, and slid a couple of switches left and right, but it wouldn't come on. I gave it back to him saying that I couldn't help him. He took the computer and gave it to the mother of the little girl it belonged to. She opened it up and pushed a button, it came on, and she gave it back to him. I asked her what she had pushed to get it to come on. She replied, "On/Off." When I said I couldn't figure it out and I work on computers for a living, she replied, "I wouldn't tell that to anyone." -<>- >Whole World I packed the car and gathered our daughters for a visit to my sister's house . On my way out the door, my husband, who wasn't going, said: "Be very careful ... my whole world is in that car!" Later, during lunch, I repeated the words of my sentimental and loving husband to my sister, and my oldest daughter cracked, "Yeah, Dad's golf clubs are in the trunk!" ========================================================= >-->VALENTINE SMILES ,@@@@@@, ,@@@@@""@@, ( _ _ , @@@@@ 6.6\@ :\ ( \/ ) {{^\@@@C _-_)@ : \ \ / {{:\\@@@) (@@' : \ \/ (\/) {{::\\ / \---.:.__\_ \/ \`::\( , \---:---._) `"`"; \ \|_.-;====I======{> | \ _.-': / (\/) | `"/ : / \/ // \/ : / \\_ \ :/ \ \ | ( ) ) ) / / / jgs / / /_ (_(____) Girl: "I can't be your valentine for medical reasons." Boy: "Really?" Girl: "Yeah, you make me sick!" Q: What did the valentines day card say to the stamp? A: Stick with me and you'll go places Q: What do farmers give their wives on Valentine's Day? A: Hog and kisses! Q: What did the painter say to her boyfriend? A: "I love you with all my art!" Q: What do single people call Valentine's Day? A: Happy Independance Day Q: What is the difference between a calendar and you? A: A calendar has a date on Valentine's day. Q: What's the best part about Valentines Day? A: The day after when all the chocolate goes on sale. Q: What would you get it you crossed Odie with the god of love? A: A stupid cupid! Q: Why did the pig give his girlfriend a box of candy? A: It was Valenswine's Day! Q: Do skunks celebrate Valentine's Day? A: Sure, they're very scent-imental! Q: What is another way of saying Happy Valentines day! A: S.A.D, Singles Awareness Day! _.-"""""'. .;__ `\ / `\ | ;a/ a `'. _ | ,_ |/_ _) / .-.-. {(}`\ \.___, \.' | | '--''-.( \_ _ / \ / .-\_ _."-.... ;_ ` .-.-. _/ '--. \ | | ."\ _/\ , | \ / / \_.' /'./ ; ` \__.' '-./ ' / __/ `\ / .' ``""--..__\___/ / | | , | \ ';_ / \ \`'-...-' \ \ | __ \ \ /-----; '. .--\_.-"\ | \ jgs / |._______|\ \ \_____,__/ '.__| Q: What did the man with the broken leg say to his nurse? A: "I've got a crutch on you!" Q: Did you hear about the romance in the tropical fish tank? A: It was a case of guppy love. Q: What do you call two birds in love? A: Tweethearts! Q: What do you call a very small valentine? A: A valentiny! Q: What did the chocolate syrup say to the ice cream? A: "I'm sweet on you!" Q: What did the paper clip say to the magnet? A: "I find you very attractive." .--. .--. : _ \/ _ : _\/ \ 6 6 / \__\ ' / \'--'/ \__/_ /\ /\ \ / \/ \ \ / jgs _\ /_ (__\ /__) Q: What did the French chef give his wife for Valentine's Day? A: A hug and a quiche! Q: What would you call a woman who goes out with Jon Gosselin? A: Desperate! Q: What did one pickle say to the other? A: "You mean a great dill to me." Knock, Knock! Who's there? Olive. Olive who? Olive you! Q: What did the elephant say to his girlfriend? A: "I love you a ton!" Q: What did the bat say to his girlfriend? A: "You're fun to hang around with." Q: What happened when the man fell in love with his garden? A: It made him wed his plants! Q: Did you hear about the nearsighted porcupine? A: He fell in love with a pincushion! Q: Why did the stupid boy put clothes on the valentines he was sending? A: Because they needed to be ad-dressed! ) ( ( ) ( ) ( ) ) ( ) ( /^\ /^\ /^\ /^\ /^\ /^\ jgs (_K_) (_I_) (_S_) (_S_) (_E_) (_S_) Q: What is the true purpose of Valentine's Day? A: To remind single people they are single. Q: Why is Valentine's Day the best day for a celebration? A: Because you can really party hearty! Q: What did one oar say to the other? A: "Can I interest you in a little row-mance?" Q: What did the pencil say to the paper? A: "I dot my i's on you!" Q: Why did the cannibal break up with his girlfriend? A: She didn't suit his taste! From: http://tinyurl.com/lv8h7rt ====================================================== >-->From Our Friend KarenF :) On the topic of celebrity soldiers .---. ___ /_____\ /\.-`( '.' ) / / \_-_/_ \ `-.-"`'V'//-. `.__, |// , \ |Ll //Ll|\ \ |__// | \_\ /---|[]==| / / \__/ | \/\/ /_ | Ll_\| |`^"""^`| | | | | | | | | | | | | L___l___J jgs |_ | _| (___|___) ^^^ ^^^ >We Were Men .... Back Then Stewart Hayden, US Marines and OSS. Smuggled guns into Yugoslavia and parachuted into Croatia. James Stewart, US Army Air Corps. Bomber pilot who rose to the rank of General. Ernest Borgnine, US Navy. Gunners Mate 1c, destroyer USS Lamberton. Ed McMahon, US Marines. Fighter Pilot. (Flew OE-1 Bird Dogs over Korea as well.) Telly Savalas, US Army. Walter Matthau, US Army Air Corps., B-24 Radioman/Gunner and cryptographer. Steve Forrest, US Army. Wounded, Battle of the Bulge. Jonathan Winters, USMC. Battleship USS Wisconsin and Carrier USS Bon Homme Richard. Anti-aircraft gunner, Battle of Okinawa. Paul Newman, US Navy Rear seat gunner/radioman, torpedo bombers of USS Bunker Hill Kirk Douglas, US Navy. Sub-chaser in the Pacific. Wounded in action and medically discharged. Robert Mitchum, US Army. Dale Robertson, US Army. Tank Commander in North Africa under Patton. Wounded twice. Battlefield Commission. Henry Fonda, US Navy. Destroyer USS Satterlee. John Carroll, US Army Air Corps. Pilot in North Africa. Broke his back in a crash. Lee Marvin US Marines. Sniper. Wounded in action on Saipan. Buried in Arlington National Cemetery, Sec. 7A next to Greg Boyington and Joe Louis. Art Carney, US Army. Wounded on Normandy beach, D-Day. Limped for the rest of his life. Wayne Morris, US Navy fighter pilot, USS Essex. Downed seven Japanese fighters. Rod Steiger, US Navy. Was aboard one of the ships that launched the Doolittle Raid. Tony Curtis, US Navy. Sub tender USS Proteus. In Tokyo Bay for the surrender of Japan. Larry Storch. US Navy. Sub tender USS Proteus with Tony Curtis. Forrest Tucker, US Army. Enlisted as a private, rose to Lieutenant. Robert Montgomery, US Navy. George Kennedy, US Army. Enlisted after Pearl Harbor, stayed in sixteen years. Mickey Rooney, US Army under Patton. Bronze Star. Denver Pyle, US Navy. Wounded in the Battle of Guadalcanal. Medically discharged. Burgess Meredith, US Army Air Corps. DeForest Kelley, US Army Air Corps. Robert Stack, US Navy. Gunnery Officer. Neville Brand, US Army, Europe. Was awarded the Silver Star and Purple Heart. Tyrone Power, US Marines. Transport pilot in the Pacific Theater. Charlton Heston, US Army Air Corps. Radio operator and aerial gunner on a B-25, Aleutians. Danny Aiello, US Army. Lied about his age to enlist at 16. Served three years. James Arness, US Army. As an infantryman, he was severely wounded at Anzio, Italy. Efram Zimbalist, Jr., US Army. Purple Heart for a severe wound received at Huertgen Forest. Mickey Spillane, US Army Air Corps, Fighter Pilot and later Instructor Pilot. Rod Serling. US Army. 11th Airborne Division in the Pacific. He jumped at Tagaytay in the Philippines and was later wounded in Manila. Gene Autry, US Army Air Corps. Crewman on transports that ferried supplies over "The Hump" in the China-Burma-India Theater. Wiliam Holden, US Army Air Corps. Alan Hale Jr, US Coast Guard. Harry Dean Stanton, US Navy. Battle of Okinawa. Russell Johnson, US Army Air Corps. B-24 crewman who was awarded Purple Heart when his aircraft was shot down by the Japanese in the Philippines. William Conrad, US Army Air Corps. Fighter Pilot. Jack Klugman, US Army. Frank Sutton, US Army. Took part in 14 assault landings, including Leyte, Luzon, Bataan and Corregidor. Jackie Coogan, US Army Air Corps. Volunteered for gliders and flew troops and materials into Burma behind enemy lines. Tom Bosley, US Navy. Claude Akins, US Army. Signal Corps., Burma and the Philippines. Chuck Connors, US Army. Tank-warfare instructor. Harry Carey Jr., US Navy. Mel Brooks, US Army. Combat Engineer. Saw action in the Battle of the Bulge. Robert Altman, US Army Air Corps. B-24 Co-Pilot. Pat Hingle, US Navy. Destroyer USS Marshall Fred Gwynne, US Navy. Radioman. Karl Malden, US Army Air Corps. 8th Air Force, NCO. Earl Holliman. US Navy. Lied about his age to enlist. Discharged after a year when they Navy found out. Rock Hudson, US Navy. Aircraft mechanic, the Philippines. Harvey Korman, US Navy. Aldo Ray. US Navy. UDT frogman, Okinawa. Don Knotts, US Army, Pacific Theater. Don Rickles, US Navy aboard USS Cyrene. Harry Dean Stanton, US Navy. Served aboard an LST in the Battle of Okinawa. Robert Stack, US Navy. Gunnery Instructor. Soupy Sales, US Navy. Served on USS Randall in the South Pacific. Lee Van Cleef, US Navy. Served aboard a sub chaser then a mine sweeper. Clifton James, US Army, South Pacific. Was awarded the Silver Star, Bronze Star, and Purple Heart. Ted Knight, US Army, Combat Engineers. Jack Warden, US Navy, 1938-1942, then US Army, 1942-1945. 101st Airborne Division. Don Adams. US Marines. Wounded on Guadalcanal, then served as a Drill Instructor. James Gregory, US Navy and US Marines. Brian Keith, US Marines. Radioman/Gunner in Dauntless dive-bombers. Fess Parker, US Navy and US Marines. Booted from pilot training for being too tall, joined Marines as a radio operator. Charles Durning. US Army. Landed at Normandy on D-Day. Shot multiple times. Awarded the Silver Star and Bronze Star and three Purple Hearts. Survived Malmedy Massacre. Raymond Burr, US Navy. Shot in the stomach on Okinawa and medically discharged. Hugh O'Brian, US Marines. Robert Ryan, US Marines. Eddie Albert, US Coast Guard. Bronze Star with Combat V for saving several Marines under heavy fire as pilot of a landing craft during the invasion of Tarawa. Cark Gable, US Army Air Corps. B-17 gunner over Europe. Charles Bronson, US Army Air Corps. B-29 gunner, wounded in action. Peter Graves, US Army Air Corps. Buddy Hackett, US Army anti-aircraft gunner. Victor Mature, US Coast Guard. Jack Palance, US Army Air Corps. Severely injured bailing out of a burning B-24 bomber. Robert Preston, US Army Air Corps. Intelligence Officer Cesar Romero, US Coast Guard. Coast Guard. Participated in the invasions of Tinian and Saipan on the assault transport USS Cavalier. Norman Fell, US Army Air Corps., Tail Gunner, Pacific Theater. Jason Robards, US Navy. was aboard heavy cruiser USS Northampton when it was sunk off Guadalcanal. Also served on the USS Nashville during the invasion of the Philippines, surviving a kamikaze hit that caused 223 casualties. Steve Reeves, US Army, Philippines. Dennis Weaver, US Navy. Pilot. Robert Taylor, US Navy. Instructor Pilot. Randolph Scott. Tried to enlist in the Marines but was rejected due to injuries sustained in US Army, World War 1. Ronald Reagan. US Army. Was a 2nd Lt. in the Cavalry Reserves before the war. His poor eyesight kept him from being sent overseas with his unit when war came so he transferred to the Army Air Corps Public Relations Unit where he served for the duration. John Wayne. Declared "4F medically unfit" due to pre-existing injuries, he nonetheless attempted to volunteer three times (Army, Navy and Film Corps.) so he gets honorable mention. And of course we have Audie Murphy, America's most-decorated soldier, who became a Hollywood star as a result of his US Army service that included his being awarded the Medal of Honor. Would someone please remind me again how many of today's Hollywood elite put their careers on hold to enlist in Iraq or Afghanistan? The only one who even comes close was Pat Tillman, who turned down a contract offer of $3.6 million over three years from the Arizona Cardinals to enlist in the US Army after September, 11, 2001 and serve as a Ranger in Afghanistan, where he died in 2004. But rather than being lauded for his choice and his decision to put his country before his career, he was mocked and derided by many of his peers and the Left. Ladies and Gentlemen, I submit to you that this is not the America today that it was seventy years ago. And I, for one, am saddened. --- ...Pretty awesome to read! Thanks Karen! Our men and woman who served who are not listed here are just as awesome to me! Great show of patriotism! One does have to remember that now we have an all volunteer service where we didn't back then. ============================================================ >-->In The Worldly News: >From BizarreNews: A Florida resident said he thinks a monkey photographed in his neighborhood might have been behind a pair of car break- ins. The monkey in the Mirabay neighborhood of Apollo Beach was photographed recently by a neighborhood resident, and experts said it appears to be a rhesus macaque. Corey Beckman, a photojournalist, said he spotted the monkey a couple weeks ago while relaxing at his home and soon came to suspect the primate of being behind two car break-ins the previous week. Beckman said the cars were ransacked, but nothing was taken. "You'd think anybody breaking into a car wound find it nice seeing a GPS there an iPod but they just left it all sitting here," Beckman said. "Maybe it didn't like my music," Beckman joked. The monkey hasn't caused any injuries and neighbors said they would like to see it relocated without being harmed. -<>- Police responding to reports of screaming coming from a home in Maine didn't find a victim of domestic violence as they feared. Instead, they found an amorous pig. State police say a woman called last week after hearing what she believed to be a fight coming from a neighbor's home in the town of China. The caller said she heard screaming and thought there was a domestic assault. Four state troopers responded and talked to the neighbor. The neighbor explained that she raises pigs and the screaming was coming from an overjoyed male pig that had been placed in a pen with five sows in heat. I think many of us can sympathize. Police say there was no assault and no disturbance "other than the screaming male pig." *-- Man allegedly bites off brother's ear in post-Super Bowl party fight --* ROCHESTER, N.Y. - A Rochester, N. Y., man allegedly bit off part of his brother's ear following a Super Bowl party Sunday, City Court documents said. Sean Fallon-Nebbia, 27, was charged with felony first-degree assault after he and his brother Frank, 26, fought in Fallon-Nebbia's apartment late Sunday. He is also accused of punching Frank Fallon-Nebbia in the face and rendering him unconscious when emergency responders arrived, the (Rochester, N.Y.) Democrat and Chronicle reported Tuesday. Court documents allege the brothers shared a bottle of whiskey and more at a party, and were roughhousing after the game when the incident occurred. Another unidentified resident of the apartment said the brothers were drunk and "play wrestling" before they "turned violent and aggressive." Sean Fallon-Nebbia pleaded not guilty Monday in City Court and was remanded to the Monroe County Jail. Frank Fallon-Nebbia received a court order of protection from his brother, and a doctor at Rochester's Strong Memorial Hospital said the ear was permanently disfigured. Sean Fallon-Nebbia is scheduled to return to court Friday. *-- Middle Eastern restaurant dubbed 'The Bomb' --* EASTPOINTE, Mich. - A Syrian couple opening a Detroit area restaurant called "The Bomb" said they want to invoke the slang term for "awesome" rather than terrorism. George and Rana Kasar, who are from Syria, said they wanted to rebrand after purchasing the Eastpointe restaurant, which was called Ideli under previous management, WWJ Detroit reported Tuesday. "It's his idea, my husband's idea," Rana Kasar said. "I said, 'No! It's too much!' He's like, 'No, no, no. I think it's going to be perfect.'" "[It's] a little bit scary. They think we're terrorists now," Rana Kasar said of local residents. However, she said terrorism is not what the name is designed to invoke. "Something like, when they eat something they're like, 'Wow! It's the bomb,'" she said. The eatery will serve both Middle Eastern and other dishes, with their signature creation being "The Bomb Fajita." *-- Woman arrested, charged for allegedly selling heroin at McDonald's --* PITTSBURGH - A McDonald's restaurant worker in Pittsburgh has been accused of selling heroin in Happy Meal boxes, authorities said. Shantia Dennis, 26, was arrested Wednesday by an undercover officer who discovered the alleged scheme, CNN reported. Customers looking to buy heroin were told to go through the drive-through and say "I'd like to buy a toy," said a statement from Mike Manko, communications director for the Allegheny County District Attorney's Office. Buyers then pulled up to the first window, where they were handed a Happy Meal box containing heroin, the statement said. When the undercover officer carried out the drug buy, he recovered 10 stamp bags of heroin inside of a Happy Meal box, the statement said. Officers recovered 50 more bags of heroin, as well as some marijuana, from inside the restaurant, Manko said. Dennis was arrested at the scene and charged with two counts of possession, one count of criminal use of a communication facility, one count of prohibited acts of delivery and one count of possession with intent to deliver, CNN reported. Authorities said the heroin being sold at Dennis' McDonald's was not related to potentially lethal batches of heroin being sold in Western Pennsylvania. *-- No charges for woman who attacked boyfriend in cuddling argument --* BRADENTON, Fla. - Prosecutors in Florida said they have decided not to pursue a case against a woman accused of beating her boyfriend for refusing to cuddle with her in bed. A Jan. 24 Circuit Court filing from an assistant state attorney said prosecutors have decided not to pursue the misdemeanor battery charge against Shavonna Rumph, 31, who allegedly attacked live-in boyfriend Henry Price, 33, after a night of drinking, the Smoking Gun website reported Thursday. The Manatee County Sheriff's Office arrest report said Rumph became angry at Price Dec. 28 when he refused to cuddle with her while they were in bed. Rumph allegedly tore Price's shirt and threatened him with a knife during the ensuing argument. ========================================================= >-->From Our Friend LouiseA :) ,;;;;;;;;;, /////////\\\\ |// __ __ \\| \/=(_o)^(o_)=\/ (_ (___) _) \ \_____/ / `-._ _.-' __.-)_(-,__ ./' \_\_/_/ `\. / > | //\ | < \ / \ | |/| | / \ / |\ | |/| | /| \ / /| \ | |/| | / |\ \ ( ( | \| |/| |/ | ) ) \ \| Y |/| Y |/ / \ | o| |/| |- | / `\ | | `^` | | /' `| o|=[Ll=|- |' | / \ | ~~|` \ `|~~ >SMILES After a very long day of listening to a visiting businessman from Texas brag about his state a New Yorker decided to show the guy the Empire State Building. When the Texan then put down New York's well-known landmark by saying "Heck, that's nothing. In Texas, we have outhouses bigger than that!" The New Yorker responded with, "Well you no doubt need them!" -------- A group of Americans were traveling by tour bus through Holland. As they stopped at a cheese farm, a young guide led them through the process of cheese making, explaining that goat's milk was used. She showed the group a lovely hillside where many goats were grazing. "These," she explained, "are the older goats put out to pasture when they no longer produce." She then asked, "What do you do in America with your old goats?" A spry old gentleman answered, "They send us on bus tours!" -------- Two men were sitting at a bar recounting their dreams. "I dreamed I was on vacation," one man said fondly. "It was just me and my fishing rod and this big beautiful lake. What a dream." "I had a great dream too," said the other. "I dreamed I was in bed with two beautiful women and having the time of my life." His companion looked over and exhorted, "You dreamed you had two women, and you didn't call me?" "Oh, I did," said the other, "but when I called, your wife said you'd gone fishing. -------- A blond carpenter was fixing some wooden window frames on a fifty-story building. He was using an electric saw and accidentally cut off one of his ears. A guy was walking along the street below him, so he called out, "Hey, you! On the street, can you see my ear down there?" The man on the street picks up an ear, saying, "Is this it?" "No," was the reply from the blond carpenter. "Mine had a pencil behind it." --- ...LOL! Thanks LouiseA! ========================================================= >-->From CleanLaffs: .--------. ( ? ? ? ) '--,-----' .-"""""-. o / _____/\_\ o //`__ __ \\ O // (o) (o) \\ (_ (___) _) \ _____ / `-._ _.-' __.-)_(-,__ ./'/ |_| \`\. jgs / `""""""""""` \ Arriving home from work at my usual hour of 5 p.m., I dis- covered that it had not been one of my wife's better days. Nothing I said or did seemed to be right. By 7 p.m. things had not changed, so before a fight started in earnest I suggested I go outside, pretend I had just gotten home, and start all over again. My wife agreed. I went outside, came back in and, with a big smile, announced, "Honey, I'm home!" "And just where have you been?" she replied sharply. "It's after seven o'clock!" -<>- "What kind of music do you sing?" "Aqua-pella." "Don't you mean 'a cappella', singing without instrumental accompaniment?" "Nope. I mean 'aqua-pella', singing accompanied only by the water coming out of the shower-head." -<>- One cold night my furnace died, so I went to my parents' house. In the morning, a neighbor called to tell me that my water pipes had burst and flooded my town house and hers. I raced home and on the way got a speeding ticket. Then the furnace repairman arrived and told me he didn't think he had the proper fuse but would check in his truck. Meanwhile, the plumber cut holes in my bathroom wall to locate the leak. When the furnace repairman returned, he held aloft a fuse. "I had the right one after all," he said triumphantly. "This must be your lucky day." -<>- Hygiene is in the eye of the beholder, I have decided. One lunchtime I watched the woman in the sandwich shop spreading mayonnaise on my bread, and noticed part of her grubby work shirt was dragging across it. "Excuse me," I ventured, "your sleeve is in the mayo." "No problem," she reassured me. "I need to wash it anyway." -<>- There are women whose thoughtful husbands buy them flowers for no reason. And then there's me. One day I couldn't stand it any longer. "Why don't you ever bring me flowers?" I asked. "What's the point?" my husband said. "They die after about a week." "So could you," I shot back, "but I still like having you around." -<>- An elderly couple came back from a wedding one afternoon and were in a pretty romantic mood. While sitting on their loveseat, the elderly woman looked at her companion and said, "I remember when you used to kiss me every chance you had." The old man feeling a bit obliged leaned over and gave her a peck on the cheek. Then she said, "I also remember when you used to hold my hand at every opportunity." The old man again feeling obligated reached over and gently placed his arm around her shoulders. The elderly woman then stated," I also remember when you used to nibble on my neck and send chills down my spine." This time the old man started to get up off the couch. As he began to walk out of the livingroom his wife asked, "Was it something I said, where are you going?" The old man looked at her and replied, "I'm going to the bathroom to get my teeth!" ========================================================= >-->From TheMouth: .---. /_/ \_\ ,;;;, ( '>') (((( )) \ -/ ('<' ))) )-(_ \= ((( / `-\'--.)_())) | \ |--./--' \ |\ \;_ /\\_ / | |_\___|_/) / / / | / /_/\ \ || | ((( | | || | | | || | | | || |_____| | || || | jgs |__||_ ||_| (___)_) ((_/Y >CHRISTIAN PICK UP LINES 1) Honesty is like a kiss on the lips...and baby i never lie. (Proverbs 24:26 "He who gives a right answer kisses the lips.") 2) Hey baby, you wanna take the church van for a spin. 3) I'm not like those other (insert your church name here) guys. 4) Has anyone ever told you, your eyes are like doves and your neck like the tower of David? 5) Excuse me, is this pew taken? 6) I don't speak in tongues, but i kiss that way. 7) God broke the mold when He made your sweet face. 8) Hello, will you be my shulamite? 9) Boy, you've really been a visual minister to me! 10) Do you know the difference between making out and a sermon? ... No? Wanna go to church with me? 11) Hi, my name's will...God's will. 12) [check the person's shirt tag] "Just as i thought... made in heaven." 13) Hey, need a ride to church? 14) I'd pick you over Satan any day 15) God was showing off when he made you. 16) I'm pretty flexible. I don't think a woman should be submissive on the first date. 17) I would like to pray with you. 18) You know Jesus? Me too? 19) No, I'm not coveting, I intend to make you mine. 20) How about a hug, sister? ========================================================== >-->FUN Places To Net Visit :) (\/) \/ (\/) .-. .-. \/ ((`-)(-`)) \\ // (\/) \\ // \/ .="""=._))((_.="""=. / ., .' '. ,. \ /__(,_.-' '-._,)__\ ` /| |\ ` /_|__ __|_\ | `)) ((` | | | jgs -"== =="- SPECIAL LINKS For Valentine's Day.... POEMS: Friends Together http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/poems/together.html I Need A Hug! http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/poems/hug.html It Takes Two! http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/poems/two.html Love's Lust! http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/poems/desire.html Moody Is My Day http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/poems/need.html TEACHINGS: Our Valuable Anchor http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/BibleStudy/ouranchor.html Choose His Children? http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/BibleStudy/choosehischildren.html You Are The Only You God Has http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/BibleStudy/onlyyougodhas.html SPECIAL PAGES: That's God! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/thatsgod.html Best Friends! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/poems/bestfriends.html Friendship! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/friendship.html I Believe... http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/believe.html God's Little Love Notes http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/notes.html Love Thoughts http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/love.html Love Story http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/lovestory.html Love Test http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/lovetest.html What Is Love 1 http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/wlove1.html What Is Love 2 http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/wlove2.html What Is Love 3 http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/wlove3.html Would You Care? http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/care.html Jesus Laughing Art http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/Jesusart.htm Akiane Child Prodigy http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/prodigy.html Tale Of Two Swallows http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/swallows.html -<>- >From Our Friend Linda :) Recess at the Asylum... She sent us one we have here... Humor In Politics 5 http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/politics5.html --- ...Good one! Thanks Linda! Snowbirds! http://www.youtube.com/embed/WsOMeru8pxQ --- ...LOL! Thanks Linda! I shoveled off a little area to feed the birds. A squirrel hopped all through the over-his-head snow to reach the spot. I was surprised to see him still there almost an hour afterwards. I figured he must have decided since it was so hard to get to, he might as well stay and munch for a while before heading out over the snow again. HaHa! -<>- >From Our Friend Geniann :) (The same applies here... So, if you are Canadian, whenever you hear the word "American", substitute the word "Canadian".) Please watch this video – it's less than 4 minutes and share it as well. It is simple and to the point and is exactly the message we need to spread across America. https://youtube.googleapis.com/v/4FrGxO2Fn_M What A Performance! https://www.youtube.com/embed/7-UTRIln9Pk B-24 ... Built Ford Tough Bet you didn't know that Ford had its own pilots to test the B-24 Liberators it was building for the ARMY at the rate of one every 55 MINUTES!! A little bit of history for aviation buffs. This was BEFORE Pearl Harbor ! Ford's B-24 Bomber Plant at Willow Run, Mich. Henry Ford was determined that he could mass produce bombers just as he had done with cars. He built the Willow Run assembly plant and proved it. It was the world's largest building under one roof. This film will absolutely blow you away - one B-24 every 55 minutes. Neither Adolf Hitler (nor the Japanese) had any idea the U.S. was capable of this kind of thing. http://www.youtube.com/embed/iKlt6rNciTo?rel=0 --- ...Great links! Thanks Geniann! -<>- >From Our Friend LouiseA :) This trick might not actually be all that impressive. That's because according to a study, the most popular PIN codes for phones are 1234 and 0000. This illusionist seems like he preys on some easy pickings. As I've said many times, don't use common passwords and passcodes to protect your data. http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=Mx7UhU5Wxmk Get ready for an optical illusion that could actually creep you out a little bit. Can you figure out why your brain can't handle it? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jdADSx8JpfI&feature=player_embedded Who knew toy poodles could be so instinctively protective of babies? You will believe this little dog would guard his baby sister with his life if he had to. Thankfully, the only danger is the sound made by a pet grooming blow dryer. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YBQJcYvRO9A&feature=player_embedded A crow solves a problem that requires eight separate stages that must be completed in a specific order. https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=AVaITA7eBZE --- ...COOL! I'm thinking the crow solved this before. Thanks LouiseA! LMAO over the comment 'i had to watch it twice to get it?' Reminds me of this one: At The Car Wash http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/carwash.html ========================================================= >-->Quotes & Thunkers: "Valentine's Day is weird. A nude flying baby that shoots arrows isn't a holiday. It's a horror movie." -Jimmy Kimmel "According to a leaked report from an upcoming U.N. study on climate change, solar activity may play a greater role in global warming than previously thought. The sun may be involved in global warming. It's always the last place you'd think, isn't it?" -Jay Leno "Anybody in town for the Westminster Kennel Club's dog show? The winner of the dog show gets a beautiful blue ribbon and a toilet full of champagne." -David Letterman "A lot of people make money off of weddings, such as caterers, photographers, and divorce lawyers." -Craig Ferguson "Hard to believe it's February. The Super Bowl is over. The football season is over. You know what that means guys... It's time to take down those Christmas lights." --Jay Leno "A new study found that running for two minutes is just as good for you as working out for 90 minutes. That doesn't sound like a study it sounds like something a chubby guy says after being on the treadmill for two minutes." -Jimmy Fallon "A company announced they are now selling waffle-flavored vodka. Who is this for, the drunks that still think break- fast is the most important meal of the day?" -Jay Leno "Today, President Obama honored more than 20 researchers for their contributions to science and technology. Unfortunately, it was overshadowed by the football game - or as those researchers put it, 'Man, high school never ends, does it?'" -Jimmy Fallon >Updated FUN STUFF URLS - Oh Yeah :) Shangy! ------------------------------------------------------------------------ http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/urls.html FUN URLS ------------------------------------------------------------------------ -->BECOMING A CHRISTIAN HOW TO BE A CHRISTIAN! ------------------------------------------------------------------------ -->FULL LENGTH - FREE On line AUDIO MP3 Christian Foundational Class http://www.truthortradition.com/modules.php?name=News&file=article&sid=61 NEW LIFE IN CHRIST! ------------------------------------------------------------------------ -->This is for all you who love food and DARE to make it at home Yep. You guessed it - Recipes. These are Tried and True, Yummy to the Tummy, good old fashioned home cooking recipes that are EASY to do :) Visit Shangy's Easy-Does-It Home Recipes: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/easy.html Home Recipes >Got A good Recipe? SHARE IT HERE: Share A Recipe ************************************************************************ >TO SUBSCRIBE: Visit Here This Weeks regular Shangy emails OR For the Yahoo ShangyFunList: To Subscribe send a blank email to ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com ************************************************************************