Thanksgiving Leftovers And More... :) Shangy! >Here are the details on our ShangyFunList: Group Web Site: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/ShangyFunList.html Group email address: bcrsystems@earthlink.net Shangrala Family Fun: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/ ================ *~* A REMINDER: PLEASE Send me sweet, interesting, funny, inspiring, family type forwards ANY TIME here... bcrsystems@earthlink.net I Need them, Love them, Use them, and Share them! THANK YOU!! AND For Facebook Users: Please Like Me here... http://tinyurl.com/cma6all AND Please Share This email with All Your Friends And Family! ^~^ May God SUPER BLESS You As You Do! THANK YOU! ================ __ __ ,-' `' \ _---``-- / _ _ ; __ `. / / `' \; /`----- ) / .-/ ,( ), \-. ; | \( \ / )/; | - _5 `7 -; / ( ___-' `-____ | ( ___`-_ \ ____| \ / `,/ \ _(\__ / \ \ ; \ .' /' `i. / | | \ _-'( _\__-/ `- | | ` ,` `_ | BP * Don't forget to follow us on social media for our latest updates and uproarious funny and inspiring pages! On Facebook: https://tinyurl.com/y8dcm8x7 On Twitter: http://tinyurl.com/n5uf3dxv ================ *~* We Had A Fabulous Month Of Caring And Sharing Last Month! &oo{ _____ _____ _____ _____ ____ __ __ /~~~~~~\ | ___| | | _ | _ | __ |\ \ / / /__________\ |___ | | | | |_| | |_| | __| \ / |______| ---|_____|_|___|_____|_____|_|-----|_|-------|______|---- ------------------------------------------------------------- ->Be Sure To Visit And Share These With All Your Friends... Tricks For Treats 8! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/tricksfortreats8.html Folklore Monsters! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/folkloremonsters.html Inspirational Short Stories! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/stories.html Amazing Trivia Facts 12! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/triviafacts12.html Chicken Wire Art! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/chickenwireart.html Strange Cars! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/strangecars.html God's Night Lights 4! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/night4.html World's Most Scenic Shores! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/scenicshores.html _ ______ / `'. ,-"` '. / /'-.'. ___ .' \ \/ '.\.' ' | .| .'`\ | /`"'--., / \ , _.--'` \/_ | ,----.| _ `_--;` ``` `\-. | | \ | -- C -- _/ \ \ | \ 0 0 / . | | \| ) | '. _.' |.__/ ; \ `'---` / / __ '. .' | (__) /'-._____,-` \ /---'.-""-.\ '. / ||,- \\ ;---`;-._||-= |\ , ."""-. \ ) `|'.___.' \ ___ \'. / '-. \ /`-`-; / \ ,/ `) \ \| \ `` | | \|| / /'.| )_ / || | | \/ .' \ \ .-'/ ` |` |.-' .-~ ~-~-._ |.'` \ ` '-. \___/,__/ ~` _ `~~-., `-.,_\_)`-.,_\) `~-,___ ~___~,,..-~~/ jgs \___/`\____/'._.' * May God Smile On All Our Sweet Contributors! Thank You! :) ======================================================== >-->From AJokeADay: .--. .--. : (\ ". _......_ ." /) : '. ` ` .' /' _ _ `\ / 0} {0 \ | / \ | | /' `\ | \ | . .==. . | / '._ \.' \__/ './ _.' jgs / ``'._-''-_.'`` \ `--` Young Billy was sitting in his mother's kitchen, watching her prepare the Thanksgiving meal. "What are you doing?" Billy asked. "Oh, I'm just stuffing the turkey," his mother replied. "That's cool!" Billy said. "Are you going to hang it next to the bear?" -<>- Q: Why did the Turkey snicker alongside the stuffing? A: It was an inside joke. -<>- My wife texted me “I love u”. I said that’s my favorite letter, too. -<>- The first time my son was on a bike with training wheels, I shouted, "Step back on the pedals and the bike will brake!" He nodded but still rode straight into a bush. "Why didn’t you push back on the pedals?" I asked, helping him up. "You said if I did, the bike would break." -<>- _____ /.---.\ |`````| \ / `-.-' ____ | /\ .' /\ __|__ |K----; | | jgs`-----` \/ '.___\/ Q: What do you call it when you mix alcohol and American Literature? A: Tequila Mockingbird. -<>- I know. I know. People say, "It's the thought that counts, not the gift." But couldn't people learn to think a bit bigger?!?! -<>- While studying the occult, a teacher asked one of the boys in her class, "Can people predict the future with cards?" His response was, "My mother can." The teacher replied, "Really?" The young boy was quick to explain, "Yes, she takes one look at my report card and tells me what will happen when my father gets home." -<>- ______ _\ _~-\___ = = ==(____AA____D \_____\___________________,-~~~~~~~`-.._ / o O o o o o O O o o o o o o O o |\_ `~-.__ ___..----.. ) `---~~\___________/------------````` = ===(_________D -Roland A student was heading home for the holidays. When she got to the airline counter, she presented her ticket to New York and as she gave the agent her luggage she asked, "I'd like you to send my green suitcase to Hawaii, and my red suitcase to London." The confused agent said, "I'm sorry, we can't do that." "Really? I am so relieved to hear you say that because, that's exactly what you did to my luggage last year!" -<>- Give a man a fish, and he’ll Instagram it... Teach a man to fish, and he’ll still Instagram it. -<>- _.-'`'-._ .-' _ '-. `-.__ `\_.-' | `-``\| jgs `-.....-A # # >Thoughts Of The Day * Any Fool Can Criticize “Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain - and most do.” - Dale Carnegie * Happiness By Choice "Happiness is not by chance but by choice." - Jim Rohn * Person With Big Dreams “Never give up on what you really want to do. The person with big dreams is more powerful than one with all the facts.” - Albert Einstein * Keep Your Temper “Keep your temper. Nobody else wants it.” - Dearborn Independent Tell me about it..... ...hiiii haaaaaan... \ /\/\ / / / _/,/ / _/` (/"/////, ( '```--.___ /' _), ,- '-. /, / \ (\ \, \_()/ \) )' =_ )) | | | .// _/) ( ( \_ // / \ >_,\ (/)= / | | | \ #\| / |=| |=|\ ( ( (=> ( >( >),) | | |=| \ ( ( / / / / ) |/ \ /_( /_( , || )/.,_ ). /\\_(\,/, //- / /_(_( / ,\. b'ger .- '-'-'-,)\/.')) * Follow the Masses “Always be careful when you follow the masses. Sometimes the m is silent.” - Unknown ======================================================== +------------ BIZARRE HOLIDAYS ------------+ December 2 is Cyber Monday, World Computer Literacy Day, National Fritters Day, Walt Disney Day, International Day for the Abolition of Slavery and World Pollution Prevention Day December 3 is Make a Gift Day, National Roof over Your Head Day, International Day of Persons with Disabilities, Giving Tuesday and Let’s Hug Day December 4 is National Cookie Day, Santa’s List Day and Wear Brown Shoes Day, International Cheetah Day and World Wildlife Conservation Day December 5 is Bathtub Party Day, Repeal Day – The 21st Amendment ends Prohibition, and World Soil Day December 6 is Bartender Appreciation Day, St. Nicholas Day, Mitten Tree Day and Put on your own Shoes Day December 7 is International Civil Aviation Day, Letter Writing Day, National Cotton Candy Day, Global Fat Bike Day and Pearl Harbor Day December 8 is International Children’s Day, National Brownie Day, National Lard Day and Take it in the Ear Day ======================================================== >-->From Mikey'sFunnies: _ _|_|_ ,|_| |_|_ || | | |_| || | | | | || | | | | _|| | | | | ||)\ ^ ^ ^ | || | | || | | || | | \\ | \\ / ejm )\ ( / \ \ / \ \ \ \ >EVERYDAY THANKSGIVING Even though I huddle in my bed and put off rising, thank you Lord, that I have the strength to rise. There are many who are bedridden. Even though the first hour of my day is hectic, when socks are lost, toast is burned, and tempers are short, my children are so loud, thank you, Lord, for my family. There are many who are lonely. Even though our breakfast table never looks like the pictures in magazines and the menu is at times unbalanced, thank you, Lord, for the food we have. There are many who are hungry. Even though the routine of my job is often monotonous, thank you, Lord, for the opportunity to work. There are many who have no job. Even though I grumble and bemoan my fate from day to day and wish my circumstances were not so modest, thank you, Lord, for life itself. -<>- Stop telling God how big your storm is. Instead, tell your storm how big your God is. -<>- ______ ) /|_|_|_\ ) ~^^^~~~~~~~~^^^~~^^~~~~^ \ | \ "I Eat therfore I Am" / | \__\)\________________/ | \ ) / \__ _ _ _/ ) / \_|_|_|/ ____ _ _ ____ ____ ____ ____ ____ __ ____ ____ ____ (_ _)( )_( )( ___) ( _ \(_ _)( ___) ( ___) /__\ (_ _)( ___)( _ \ )( ) _ ( )__) )___/ _)(_ )__) )__) /(__)\ )( )__) ) / (__) (_) (_)(____) (__) (____)(____) (____)(__)(__) (__) (____)(_)\_) ThePieMaster@thepieeater.demon.co.uk >SIGNS YOU'RE OVERDOING THANKSGIVING ~ Doctor tells you your weight would be perfect for a man 17 feet tall. ~ You are responsible for a slight but measurable shift in the earth's axis. ~ You have five TV sets side-by-side to catch all the football games. ~ You spill more food on you than the local soup kitchen dispenses. ~ Paramedics bring in the Jaws of Life to pry you out of the EZ-Boy. ~ You set off 3 earthquake seismographs on your morning jog Friday. ~ Pricking your finger for cholesterol screening only yielded gravy. ~ Representatives from the Butterball Hall of Fame called twice. ~ Your arms are too short to reach the keyboard and delete this. -<>- Thanksgiving is the only holiday you deep-fry the mascot. -<>- \\\/// \(..)/ ( _> ) _/'--/_ /^ _ _ `\ .' / \ ) | \' '// ,, < < | | \ ,, ||, `. \\ . /, \ ,|| =|||===(((==========)))===|||= ||^ /`:----/\ `|| `` ( \ / \ `` | /`^\ | | | | | | / \ | / `| |^ \ | / \ | | | | | / \ | \ gnv .oooO LOoo >EXERCISE IN PREPARATION FOR THANKSGIVING Begin by standing on a comfortable surface, where you have plenty of room at each side. With a 5-lb potato sack in each hand, extend your arms straight out from your sides and hold them there as long as you can. Try to reach a full minute, and then relax. Each day, you'll find that you can hold this position for just a bit longer. After a couple of weeks, move up to 10-lb potato sacks. Then try 50-lb potato sacks and then eventually try to get to where you can lift a 100-lb potato sack in each hand and hold your arms straight for more than a full minute. After you feel confident at that level, put a potato in each of the sacks. -<>- .--. {\ / q {\ { `\ \ (-(~` { '.{`\ \ \ ) {'-{ ' \ .-""'-. \ \ {._{'.' \/ '.) \ {_.{. {` | {._{ ' { ;'-=-. | {-.{.' { ';-=-.` / {._.{.; '-=- .' {_.-' `'.__ _,-' jgs |||` .='==, What do you call a running turkey? Fast food. ======================================================== >-->From Our Friend LouiseAu :) | | | _ | | <_> | | | | | `-._ | |`-._| | | _________________________________|____ `-._ `-._ | `-._ `-._ | kat `-._ `-._ >SMILES "If you ever spent a Sunday with me instead of watching football I swear I would drop dead," she screamed. "There's no point in trying to bribe me," replied the husband. ------------ Stumpy and his wife Martha went to the state fair every year. Every year Stumpy would say, "Martha, I'd like to ride in that there airplane." And every year Martha would say, "I know Stumpy, but that airplane ride costs ten dollars, and ten dollars is ten dollars." One year Stumpy and Martha went to the fair and Stumpy said, "Martha, I'm 71 years old. If I don't ride that airplane this year I may never get another chance." Martha replied, "Stumpy, that there airplane ride costs ten dollars, and ten dollars is ten dollars." The pilot overheard them and said, "Folks, I'll make you a deal, I'll take you both up for a ride. If you can stay quiet for the entire ride and not say one word, I won't charge you, but if you say one word it's ten dollars." Stumpy and Martha agreed and up they went. The pilot did all kinds of twists and turns, rolls and dives, but not a word was heard. He did all his tricks over again, but still not a word. They landed and the pilot turned to Stumpy, "By golly, I did everything I could think of to get you to yell out, but you didn't." Stumpy replied, "Well, I was gonna say something when Martha fell out, but ten dollars is ten dollars." ------------ Two assassins are hired to kill a dictator in South America. They follow his every move for months, and find out that every day at noon he goes outside and does his stretching exercises. So the assassins set up shop right across the street, get all of their sights set, load the guns, and have everything ready to go. Noon comes, no dictator... 10 minutes longer... no dictator... 10 minutes longer... Still no dictator. One assassin turns to the other and says, "Gee, I hope nothing happened to him." ------------ * * ,,, ____()() } ======= ( \\ \ \\____===. ______) ( )\(____ / ___/ \ [%]__ \ //|| // \ ||\\ || ||__^^^ ^^^___|| || ejm97 ||/____\_/----\_/_____\|| | ____________________ || || || || || || || || || || || || || || || Q: After eating a meal at a restaurant, what did the duck say to the waiter? A: Put it on my bill. ------------ A businessman boarded a plane to find, sitting next to him, an elegant woman wearing the largest, most stunning diamond ring he had ever seen. He asked her about it. "This is the Masterson diamond," she said. "It is beautiful, but there is a terrible curse that goes with it." "Oh? What's the curse?" the man asked. "Mr. Masterson." ------------ Two attorneys went into a diner and ordered two drinks. Then they produced sandwiches from their briefcases and started to eat. The owner became quite concerned and marched over and told them, "You can't eat your own sandwiches in here!" The attorneys looked at each other, shrugged their shoulders and then exchanged sandwiches. ------------ .-------. |Jackpot| ____________|_______|____________ | __ __ ___ _____ __ | | / _\ / / /___\/__ \ / _\ | | \ \ / / // // / /\ \\ \ 25| | _\ \/ /___/ \_// / / \/_\ \ []| | \__/\____/\___/ \/ \__/ []| |===_______===_______===_______===| ||*|\_ |*| _____ |*|\_ |*|| ||*|| \ _ |*|| ||*|| \ _ |*|| ||*| \_(_) |*||*BAR*||*| \_(_) |*|| ||*| (_) |*||_____||*| (_) |*|| __ ||*|_______|*|_______|*|_______|*||(__) |===_______===_______===_______===| || ||*| _____ |*|\_ |*| ___ |*|| || ||*|| ||*|| \ _ |*| |_ | |*|| || ||*||*BAR*||*| \_(_) |*| / / |*|| || ||*||_____||*| (_) |*| /_/ |*|| || ||*|_______|*|_______|*|_______|*||_// |===_______===_______===_______===|_/ ||*| ___ |*| | |*| _____ |*|| ||*| |_ | |*| / \ |*|| ||*|| ||*| / / |*| /_ _\ |*||*BAR*||*|| ||*| /_/ |*| O |*||_____||*|| ||*|_______|*|_______|*|_______|*|| |lc=___________________________===| | /___________________________\ | | | | | _| \_______________________/ |_ (_____________________________________) Two blonde gals went together to play the slot machines at the casino. Each agreed that when her allotted money was gone, she would go to the front of the casino and sit on the bench to wait for the other. Connie quickly lost all her money and went to sit on the bench. She waited and waited. After what seemed an eternity, she finally saw Lori coming toward her, carrying this huge sack of coins. "Hey, Connie," said Lori, "how'd you do?" "Not very good," came the reply. "I've been waiting here for hours." Lori said, "You should have been with me... did I ever find a good machine! It's way in the back. Come! I'll show it to you. You can't lose! Ever time you put a dollar in, you win four quarters!" -<>- _______ / \__ ( ) ""\ (" ) \ / \__ __/ \ ( __ ) """"""""//"""""" \\\\\\//\\\\\\\\ \\\\ \\\\\\\\\\\ \\\\//\\\ \\ \\\ \\//\\\ \\\\\\\\ \\\ \\\\\\ \\\ \\ //\\\\ \\\\\\\\\ \\ \\\__\ \/HHH\\ //\,-' \\ o| \ \/\ _\ C|' \ SMA /__\_,-' ,; *x* /dd >Camping Tips: * A potato baked in the coals for one hour makes an excellent side dish. A potato baked in the coals for three hours makes an excellent hockey puck. * You can start a fire without matches by eating Mexican food, then breathing on a pile of dry sticks. * In emergency situations, you can survive in the wilderness by shooting small game with a sling-shot made from the elastic waistband of your underwear. * The guitar of the noisy teenager at the next campsite makes excellent kindling. * Check the washing instructions before purchasing any apparel to be worn camping. Buy only those with cleaning instructions that read "Beat on a rock in stream." * It's entirely possible to spend your whole vacation on a winding mountain road behind a large motor home. * In an emergency, a drawstring from a parka hood can be used to strangle a snoring tent mate. --- ....Oh My! LMAO! Thanks LouiseAu! -<>- __:.__ (_:..'"= |:/ o o\ AHAH! ;'-' (_) Spaceman Spiff . '-._ ;-' wins again ! _'._|\/: /:; ; . '- ' /_ /.; ; ;, \__ _/, "_< |;|..| ;| '._____ _) |.|.'| || _ ___ _/ / snd |.|..| :/ =uu\___`;--| \;|..|:': _ _ _ ||_\| .. _||__|:\_\.''..' ) ___________ ( )_)||_|| :....::''::/ |::;:|''| "/ /_=_=_=_=_=/ :_[__'_\3_) '''' '-''-'-'.__)-' >At Age... At age 4 success is . . . not peeing in your pants. At age 12 success is . . . having friends. At age 16 success is . . . having a drivers license. At age 20 success is . . . having a girlfriend that thinks you are really good looking. At age 35 success is . . . having money. At age 50 success is . . . having money. At age 60 success is . . . having a girlfriend that thinks you are really good looking. At age 70 success is . . . having a drivers license At age 75 success is . . . having friends. At age 80 success is . . . not peeing in your pants --- ...TeeHee! Nailed it! Thanks LouiseAu! -<>- .-----------------------. |ALWAYS a bad-hair-day! | \ |/ , .'-----------------------' /\\(^/, ' @ @ -\ c /\ = \ tre ________________________________________________ >Phyllis Diller Humor As your beauty fades, so will his eyesight. - Phyllis Diller Housework can't kill you, but why take a chance? -Phyllis Diller Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing up is like shoveling the sidewalk before it stops snowing. -Phyllis Diller The reason women don't play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public. - Phyllis Diller Best way to get rid of kitchen odors: Eat out. -Phyllis Diller A bachelor is a guy who never made the same mistake once. - Phyllis Diller I want my children to have all the things I couldn't afford. Then I want to move in with them. -Phyllis Diller Most children threaten at times to run away from home. This is the only thing that keeps some parents going. -Phyllis Diller Any time three New Yorkers get into a cab without an argument, a bank has just been robbed. -Phyllis Diller We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve years telling them to sit down and shut up. -Phyllis Diller Burt Reynolds once asked me out. I was in his room. -Phyllis Diller What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day. -Phyllis Diller The only time I ever enjoyed ironing was the day I accidentally got gin in the steam iron. -Phyllis Diller His finest hour lasted a minute and a half. -Phyllis Diller Old age is when the liver spots show through your gloves. -Phyllis Diller My photographs don't do me justice -they look just like me. -Phyllis Diller Tranquilizers work only if you follow the advice on the bottle - keep away from children. -Phyllis Diller I asked the waiter, 'Is this milk fresh?' He said, 'Lady, three hours ago it was grass.' -Phyllis Diller The reason the golf pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can't see him laughing. -Phyllis Diller You know you're old if they have discontinued your blood type. -Phyllis Diller --- ...LOL! She was such a riot! Thanks LouiseAu! ======================================================== >-->From HandyHints: ____ ___ _.--"""-, / ) / \ .' `\ / _\ / \/ \ / .-' / _ | /.-.--.-.-.)/ / ( )\_ .\|(_._.__._._) / \,' \/ \ \ / : , | 0 _ 0 |/ : \ _/ (_) |`\ ,' `; "\ \ / / | | | /'. '._.' .' / \_,' .( '-----'` .'-. '-._ .-'\ '. [ `''''') ) `\ { ( ( ,\ / /\ '-..-'/ ; .-' ( '. / | .' ) `;---'` | /' /__.-' } / / O ' '----' ; / ! ___ { ! }/ \ ( _--- / | ___----'(__ .-' !\___/ .---' / .-.--' '------'------ --( ____)/ _-' (;(;;---'' (_(_(;; miraculis /jgs >Deck the Halls: Creative Holiday Decorating Tips for Your Home * Festive Flair: Creative Tips for Decorating Your Home for the Holidays Decorating for the holidays can transform your home into a cozy, festive haven and set the tone for gatherings with friends and family. Whether you're preparing for Christmas, Hanukkah, or any other holiday, thoughtful decorations can create a magical atmosphere. Here are some creative and practical tips for holiday decor that will inspire you to make your space beautiful and welcoming during the holiday season. 1. Start with a Theme Choosing a theme for your holiday decorations can help create a cohesive look and feel throughout your home. Whether you prefer a classic red- and-green Christmas style, a snowy winter wonderland, or a more modern take with metallics and minimalistic touches, having a theme makes decorating easier and more fun. If you have children, involve them in picking the theme-they may love contributing their ideas for playful holiday touches. Some popular holiday themes include: Traditional: Red, green, gold, and silver are timeless colors that never go out of style. Think of garlands, wreaths, and stockings hung by the chimney with care. Rustic: Wood, burlap, and pinecones, combined with plaid patterns and earthy tones, create a cozy, farmhouse-inspired vibe. Winter Wonderland: Focus on icy whites, frosty blues, and metallic silvers. Snowflakes, twinkling lights, and faux snow create a magical ambiance. Modern/Minimalist: Simple, elegant, and sleek decor with clean lines and neutral tones, accented by metallic or matte finishes for a refined look. 2. Adorn Your Entryway The entryway is the first thing guests see when they arrive, so it's essential to make a strong first impression. A festive wreath on the front door is a holiday classic. You can choose a traditional pinecone wreath, a colorful one with ornaments, or even a DIY wreath made from natural elements like holly and eucalyptus. For a modern twist, try a metallic wreath or one made from unexpected materials like fabric, wood slices, or felt. Add a welcome mat with a seasonal message or pattern, and line the walkway with string lights or lanterns to guide guests into your home. 3. Deck the Halls with Garland Garlands are a versatile holiday decoration that can be used in various areas of your home. You can hang them on stair rails, mantels, and even across windows and doors. Traditional evergreen garlands are beautiful, but consider mixing in artificial ones that feature lights or colorful decorations like berries, ribbons, or ornaments for extra flair. If you're looking for a natural touch, create your own garland by stringing popcorn and cranberries together or using fresh greenery like pine, holly, or magnolia leaves. For a modern aesthetic, go for metallic or beaded garlands in silver, gold, or copper to complement contemporary decor styles. 4. Twinkle with Lights Lights are one of the easiest and most effective ways to create a warm, festive ambiance in your home. Whether you string them along your roofline, around windows, or through a mantelpiece, fairy lights can instantly brighten your space and set the tone for the season. When choosing lights, consider the following: Twinkling Lights: These create a magical effect that can make your decor feel even more festive. String Lights: Perfect for draping over a tree, winding through garlands, or lining shelves and mantels. Candles: Battery-operated LED candles with flickering effects are a safer option for adding warmth to your decorations. Place them in candleholders, lanterns, or around the house to create a welcoming glow. Read this full article here: https://tinyurl.com/226w9s8n ======================================================== >-->In The Worldly News: President Donald J. Trump https://www.donaldjtrump.com/ Latest From Lifezette News: https://www.lifezette.com/ Tucker Carlson On Rumble https://rumble.com/c/TuckerCarlson Latest Eric Bolling: https://ericbolling.com/ Latest From Hannity: https://hannity.com/ Latest From American Action News: https://americanactionnews.com/ Latest From Reliable News: https://reliablenewsnow.com/ Latest From Newsmax: https://www.newsmax.com/ Latest From Expose: https://expose-news.com/ Latest From Billings Report: https://billingsreport.com/ Latest From AFA: http://tinyurl.com/j7lakqw Latest From OperationRescue: http://www.operationrescue.org/ Latest Product Alert: http://www.emergencyemail.org/products/?fmt=text Latest Health Alert: http://www.emergencyemail.org/health/?fmt=text Click to Give Free https://greatergood.com/clicktogive/ggc/home -<>- >From Archives BizarreNews: There is 'eating out' your ex-girlfriend, and then there is eating your ex-girlfriend. One will get you an awkward next morning with someone you thought you had ended a relationship with, the other will get you a lifetime in a metal and concrete cage while criminology experts examine you through a tiny window. This Indiana man will not have to worry about having that awkward next morning conversation with his ex. Clark County has charged 34-year-old Joseph Oberhansley with murder and abuse of a corpse in the death of 46-year-old Tammy Jo Blanton in September. According to court documents, Oberhansley told police he broke into Blanton's home and killed and mutilated her, then ate her heart and parts of her brain and lung. That's right; real, live Hannibal Lecter stuff. And if you think this story couldn't possible get any worse, Clark County Prosecutor Jeremy Mull just recently asked for a rape charge to be added. In Indiana, aggravated circumstances needed for a jury to consider the death penalty include rape, burglary and dismemberment. I didn't think things could get much more aggravated than eating somebody's brains, but I guess I was wrong. *--- Nudists Plan Roller-Coaster World Record ---* A British nudist group is organizing an attempt at breaking the Guinness World Record by having more than 100 people ride a roller-coaster while naked. British Naturism said it is hoping at least 103 people will participate in the attempt to break the record for most naked riders on a theme park ride at Blackpool Pleasure Beach. The current record was set in 2010, when 102 naked people took a ride on the Green Scream roller- coaster at Adventure Island in Southend-on-Sea, Essex, England. The new attempt will take place on the notoriously bumpy Grand National roller-coaster. Participants are being asked to bring a bathrobe, flip-flops or tennis shoes, a towel to sit on and a bag to store their clothes. The record attempt will be followed by a "skinny dip" event at the Sandcastle Waterpark, which will allow people to ride the water slides in the buff for three hours. --- ...Good thing for the towel else they'd have to hose down the seats afterward! *--- Gorilla Arrested ---* A man wearing a gorilla costume last week broke into a Louisiana residence, according to cops who fought with the suspect after finding him hiding under a mattress. The investigation began when Sulphur City police got a call about a suspicious person in an all-black costume walking the streets and going into residents yards. When officers arrived on the scene they learned a male subject was looking through windows of homes and sneaking through yards. "Who goes around in a gorilla suit, peeking in windows?" said one resident. When officers located the suspect--later identified as Jeremie Joseph Moran, 34--he fled into a nearby residence, ignoring police demands to stop. During a subsequent search of the home, cops found Moran wearing a "black gorilla suit" investigators say. Moran tussled with cops trying to handcuff him, but he was eventually subdued and placed under arrest. He was charged with multiple offenses, including unauthorized entry of an inhabited dwelling, methamphetamine possession, resisting a police officer with violence or force, and wearing a mask or hood in public. ========================================================= >-->From Our Friend WilmaP :) ^^ .-=-=-=-. ^^ ^^ (`-=-=-=-=-`) ^^ (`-=-=-=-=-=-=-`) ^^ ^^ ^^ (`-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-`) ^^ ^^ ( `-=-=-=-(@)-=-=-` ) ^^ (`-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-`) ^^ (`-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-`) ^^ (`-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-`) ^^ (`-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-`) ^^ (`-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-`) ^^ (`-=-=-=-=-=-=-`) ^^ ^^ jgs (`-=-=-=-=-`) `-=-=-=-=-` >Honey! ** DON’T THROW IT OUT... Great advice from a bee keeper ** So, periodically someone will complain that a jar of honey in their cupboard has gone bad, when Honey actually never goes bad! It looks crystalized or like it is separated in the jar. Crystalization happens when there is an imbalance of the two sugars in honey — glucose and fructose. Usually the bees get that balance perfect, but sometimes honey is harvested from a comb before all of the honey is capped. The bees didn’t get to finish the job. But it’s no problem. You see, some jars get crystalized or separated honey from beehives. It can happen slowly over time. So, here’s how to whip that honey back into shape: All you do is put the jar in some warm — not hot water — and slowly stir the honey. In about 20 minutes the jar is back to its perfect golden self. Tastes great. Unless honey is somehow contaminated with a foreign substance it will NEVER spoil or go bad. Did you know archaeologists have found 3,000-year-old honey in Egyptian tombs and it was perfectly edible? Don’t throw it out. Honey is expensive. Just warm it up and put it back in the cupboard ready for your next biscuit and butter. HOPE THAT HELPS. --- ...A great tip! Thanks WilmaP! ========================================================= >-->From Cleanlaughs: _ |-| |~| |:| WINE AND CHEESE .'.'. / ::\ |_____| __ _ |:.:;.| <:__:> .-'o\ |_____| \ ::/ .o' O. o\ | ::| '..' |--o.--o--| | ;:| || |._._o_._.| \_____/ .''. '----' pjb It's getting about that time. I need to start thinking about Christmas shopping which, for me, involves a case of booze and cheese...probably. Maybe some salami. I gave up on buying actually gifts years ago, and it has saved me immeasurable stress. Yep, if you're friends with old Joe you'll never have to worry about going without cheese on Christmas. Laugh it up, Joe -<>- At a fancy reception a young man was asked by a widow to guess her age. "You must have some idea," she urged when he hesitated. "I have a couple ideas," he admitted with a smile. "The trouble is that I don't know whether to make it ten years younger, because of your looks, or ten years older, because of your intelligence." -<>- Our Supply Clerk at the factory where I work, discovered a box that was left on the loading dock with this warning printed on it: DANGER DO NOT TOUCH! Management was called and all employees were told to stay clear of the box until it could be analyzed. When the foreman arrived, he donned gloves and safety glasses, and then, very carefully opened the box. Inside were 250 signs that read: DANGER! DO NOT TOUCH! -<>- _,---. (/_/)))) \c e_e) . \ = ) _| ,-` -(_ |o| / `-'\\ |#{) /__| ._ _)y / < \ (\_/ `.\ ____\ ,>>> | .==T=T==.__| | | / | |\ |_______| \ / /\ \ / ,' `. \ / / \ \ <\_\_ \ \ `---` (_`-\_ `---' hjw As a single, never-married woman in my 40s, I have been questioned endlessly about my status by my friends, relatives, and co-workers. Over the years, I've noticed a subtle change in the nature of their inquiries. In my teens, friends would ask, "Who are you going out with this weekend?" In my 20s, relatives would say, "Who are you dating?" In my 30s, co-workers might inquire, "So, are you dating anyone yet ?" Now people ask, "Where did you get that adorable purse?" -<>- A man pacing back and forth glanced at his watch and yelled upstairs to his wife, "Honey, are you ready yet?" Shouting back, the woman replies, "For crying out loud, Ed, I've been telling you for the last half hour...I'll be ready in a minute!" -<>- One semester when my brother, Peter, attended the University of Minnesota in Minneapolis, an art-student friend of his asked if he could paint Peter's portrait for a class assignment. Peter agreed, and the art student painted and submitted the portrait, only to receive a C minus. The art student approached the professor to ask why the grade was so poor. The teacher told him that the proportions in the painting were incorrect. "The head is too big," the professor explained. "The shoulders are too wide, and the feet are enormous." The next day, the art student brought Peter to see the professor. He took one look at my brother and said, "Okay, A minus." -<>- .`:;ij;f,;, .`;sk568G6itz,-", .\a\x68888888886r/,-' -._sV888P^98^"^9888k,-_" `.-\Q889" " `888/,-', .-_J88f 188KJ-_. ,-;388| o o |888[=- _".>88l j88E:._" _"Z3886._ ,J.__.488R=;. .'/288888888888888S^._" '"j^7Z988888885R^L`-. ,'./jQV9TYVR\[\`". '|'|! |'|`. " ./ l | \ .'_ _.\ j, `._,. (_)_)._) (_.__,._) itz A visiting minister waxed eloquent during the offertory prayer. "Dear Lord," he began with arms extended and a rapturous look on his upturned face, "without you we are but dust..." He would have continued but at that moment my very obedient daughter (who was listening carefully for a change!) leaned over to me and asked quite audibly in her shrill little girl voice, "Mom, what is butt dust?" ========================================================= >-->From Our Friend Geniann :) , , /////| ///// | ///// | |~~~| | | |===| |/| | B |/| | | I | | | | B | | | | L | / | E | / |===|/ jgs '---' >Sunday Funnies: A father was approached by his small son who told him proudly, "I know what the Bible means!" His father smiled and replied, "What do you mean, you 'know' what the Bible means? The son replied, "I do know!" "Okay," said his father. "What does the Bible mean?" "That's easy, Daddy..." the young boy replied excitedly, "It stands for 'Basic Information Before Leaving Earth.' (This one is my favorite) ======== There was a very gracious lady who was mailing an old family Bible to her brother in another part of the country. "Is there anything breakable in here?" asked the postal clerk. "Only the Ten Commandments." answered the lady. ======== "Somebody has said there are only two kinds of people in the world. There are those who wake up in the morning and say, "Good morning, Lord," and there are those who wake up in the morning and say, "Good Lord, it's morning." ======== , __ _.-"` `'-. /||\'._ __{}_( |||| |'--.__\ | L.( ^_\^ \ .-' | _ | | | )\___/ | \-'`:._] jgs \__/; '-. A minister parked his car in a no-parking zone in a large city because he was short of time and couldn't find a space with a meter. Then he put a note under the windshield wiper that read: "I have circled the block 10 times. If I don't park here, I'll miss my appointment. Forgive us our trespasses." When he returned, he found a citation from a police officer along with this note "I've circled this block for 10 years. If I don't give you a ticket I'll lose my job. Lead us not into temptation." ======== There is the story of a pastor who got up one Sunday and announced to his congregation: "I have good news and bad news. The good news is, we have enough money to pay for our new building program. The bad news is, it's still out there in your pockets." ======== While driving in Pennsylvania, a family caught up to an Amish carriage. The owner of the carriage obviously had a sense of humor, because attached to the back of the carriage was a hand printed sign... "Energy efficient vehicle: Runs on oats and grass. Caution: Do not step in exhaust." ======== _|_ ____|____ #%@@ /~~~~.~~~~\ @@%# @%%#%%, /~~~~/ \~~~~\ ,%%#%%@ %%@@%%@%/~~~~/ : \~~~~\%@%%@@%% `@%%%@#@/____/ (X) \____\@%%%@#@` @@\@%%@`|.`.| ___ |.`.|`@%%@/@@ `#%/@ |:x:|| .||:x:| @\%#` || |:x:|| ||:x:| || -_|| _-|:x:||~ .||:x:|-_ ||_- !-!-!-!-!-|___||___||___|-!-!-!-!-!lc A Sunday School teacher began her lesson with a question, "Boys and girls, what do we know about God?" A hand shot up in the air. "He is an artist!" said the kindergarten boy. "Really? How do you know?" the teacher asked. "You know - Our Father, who does art in Heaven.." ======== A minister waited in line to have his car filled with gas just before a long holiday weekend. The attendant worked quickly, but there were many cars ahead of him. Finally, the attendant motioned him toward a vacant pump. "Reverend," said the young man, "I'm so sorry about the delay. It seems as if everyone waits until the last minute to get ready for a long trip." The minister chuckled, "I know what you mean. It's the same in my business." ======== People want the front of the bus, the back of the church, and the center of attention. ======== Sunday after church, a Mom asked her very young daughter what the lesson was about. The daughter answered, "Don't be scared, you'll get your quilt." Needless to say, the Mom was perplexed. Later in the day, the pastor stopped by for tea and the Mom asked him what that morning's Sunday school lesson was about. He said "Be not afraid, thy comforter is coming." ======== Last, but not least, a great one: ^ ,| ]. /] ] ] ]\ /] ] ] ] ] ]\ |\ | ] ] ] ] ] ] ] /| | |\ /] ] ] ] ] ] ] ]\ /| | | | ||| ] ] ] ] ] ] ] ] ]|| | | |U|U||| ] ] ] ] ] ] ] ] ]||U|U| |"\| |||U]U]U]U]U]U]U]U]U]|| |/"| | \ ||| ] ] ] ] ] ] ] ] ]|| / | ||\ \||| ]_]-'""@""`-|_] ]||/ /|| || L |`\ , |_____| . /'| T || || |\ | |{ `"""""' }| | /| || |`"""'| | \ / | |`"""'| `"""""[__| |_______| |__]"""""' `-.|"""""""|.-' Ojo'98 The minister was preoccupied with thoughts of how he was going to ask the congregation to come up with more money than they were expecting for repairs to the church building. Therefore, he was annoyed to find that the regular organist was sick and a substitute had been brought in at the last minute. The substitute wanted to know what to play. "Here's a copy of the service," he said impatiently. "But, you'll have to think of something to play after I make the announcement about the finances." During the service, the minister paused and said, "Brothers and Sisters, we are in great difficulty; the roof repairs cost twice as much as we expected and we need $4,000 more. Any of you who can pledge $100 or more, please stand up." At that moment, the substitute organist played "The Star Spangled Banner." And that is how the substitute became the regular organist! ======= _.---**""**-. ._ .-' /|`. \`.' / | `. V ( ; \ L _.- -. `' \ / `-. _.' \ ; : __ ; _ | :`-.___.+-*"': ` ; .' `. | |`-/ `--*' / / /`.\| : : \ :`.| ; | | . ;/ .' ' / : : / ` :__.' \`._.-' / | : ) : ; :----.._ | / : .-. `. / \ `._ / /`- / : .' \ ) .-' `-----*"' [bug] Just Sayin' - When you carry the Bible, Satan gets a headache... When you open it, he collapses... When he sees you reading it, he faints... When he sees that you are living what you read, he flees... And when you are about to forward this message... He will try and discourage you! I just defeated him!!! Any other takers? --- ...(Raising my hand) - ME! Good ones! Thanks Geniann! ========================================================= >-->FUN Places To Net Visit :) Witty Comebacks!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/comebacks.html Big Boy Toys!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/bigboytoys.html Longleat's Meals On Wheels! http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/meals.html Awesome Bikes!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/awesomebikes.html Eye Catching Humor!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/eyecatching.html Unique Designer Shoes!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/shoes.html World's Fastest Cars!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/fastcars.html There's Something About Mona 2!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/monalisa2.html Werribee's Open Range Zoo!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/werribeezoo.html Luxury Golf Carts!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/golfcarts.html Volkner Mobil RV!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/rv.html All About Hugs!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/hugs.html Disney Wisdom!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/disneywisdom.html Attitude Is Everything 3!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/attitude3.html High Tech Toys 2!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/techtoys2.html Wild Kisses And Snuggles 2!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/wildkisses2.html US Civil War In Color!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/civilwar.html FULL 9/11 And Troops INDEX!- http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/911andtroopsindex.html -<>- How to Become a Christian - How to Get Born Again / How to Get Saved / Romans 10:9 & 10 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DMzblR8YDQ0 Bible https://quod.lib.umich.edu/k/kjv/ Bible Study VIDEO Topics: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL26wBwzo4McoJavqV5eMTdA0hKDJceD54 -<>- >-->From Our Friend LouiseAu :) Animals That Asked People For Help & Kindness - Best Moments Of 2023 Animals are some of nature’s most beautiful creations. But sometimes, these precious creatures end up in unfortunate situations that they just can’t escape. But luckily for them, there are kind and brave people out there that are willing to help. So join us as we look at a hundred of the most heartwarming animal rescues that will make you cry and restore your faith in humanity! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rxh6nghYJB4 If you'd like to restore your faith in humanity take 4 minutes and watch this compilation of amazing animal rescues filmed around the world. Cats, dogs, ducks, and other animals sometimes find themselves in a precarious position where they need a little help from a human hand to rescue them. The ability to show love and compassion towards animals is something that should be cherished in life on this planet. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=btiDHCuWyBA --- ...Aww, so heartwarming! Thanks LouiseAu! I do love animal rescues - as you can tell, I have a bunch of pages about them! Here's Just a few of my favorites: Eagle Rescue http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/eaglerescue.html BiBi's Rescue http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/dogrescue.html True Fish Tale http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/fishrescue.html Elephant Rescue http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/elephant3.html Bear Rescue 2 http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/bearrescue2.html Fawn Rescue 2 http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/fawnrescue2.html Deer Rescue http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/deerrescue.html Goose Calls For Cops http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/mothergoose.html Penguin Rescue Story http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/penguinrescue.html True Duck Tale http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/duck.html Dog Rescues 2 http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/dogrescues2.html Whale Rescue 2 http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/whalerescue2.html ======================================================= >-->Quotes & Thunkers: "At the airport they asked me if anybody I didn't know gave me anything. Even the people I know don't give me anything." --George Wallace "When you get married and have a kid, you can't do all of those things you wanted to do as a young existentialist of seventeen or eighteen... like kill yourself." --Al Rae "I'm very, very jealous. Sometimes I walk down the street and I see a beautiful woman and I think to myself: "I'll bet my boyfriend would like to sleep with her" and I get SO ANGRY. I run right home and smack him, and say, 'How much more of this do you think I can take?'" --Denise Munro The movie "Alexander the Great" is not doing too well at the box office. In fact, by the weekend it may be downgraded to "Alexander the Video." --Jay Leno "I was in the elevator today and heard some Kenny G Christmas music. Finally I had to say, 'Hey, Kenny, take it to the stairs.'" --Dave Letterman "The new commerce secretary is the former CEO of Kellogg's. After the announcement, the President said that maybe he shouldn't make nominations on an empty stomach." --Conan O'Brien "I tried to make money as a kid. I had a lemonade stand for about six weeks. I made no money. I had to burn it down and collect insurance." --Brian Kiley "My girlfriend is at that stage when her biological clock is telling her it's time for her to be making me feel guilty and immature." --Kevin Hench "My father would say things that made no sense at all, like, 'If I were the last person on earth, some moron would turn left in front of me.'" --Louie Anderson >Updated FUN STUFF URLS - Oh Yeah, Shangy! ---------------------------------------------------------------------- http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/urls.html FUN URLS ---------------------------------------------------------------------- -->ShangyFunList AD RATES: $35 will get your a message (of up to 40 words) out to all web site list readers. Email me to secure dates. Ad Request ---------------------------------------------------------------------- -->FULL LENGTH - FREE On line AUDIO MP3 Christian Foundational Class NEW LIFE IN CHRIST! ---------------------------------------------------------------------- -->This is for all you who love food and DARE to make it at home Yep. You guessed it - Recipes. These are Tried and True, Yummy to the Tummy, good old fashioned home cooking recipes that are EASY to do Visit Shangy's Easy-Does-It Home Recipes: http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/easy.html Home Recipes >Got A good Recipe? SHARE IT HERE: Share A Recipe **********************************************************************